The Struggle is Real

In this episode of Higher Valleys, Spencer and Jelani get real about what it means to be fathers in transition. From navigating personal anxiety and moments of dysregulation, to apologizing to their kids and showing up with honesty, the conversation goes deep into vulnerability, legacy, and resilience.

They share stories of parenting through tough mornings, moving homes, and managing sickness in the family — while still finding humor, perspective, and even superhero jokes in the chaos. Along the way, they touch on midlife transitions, creating happiness intentionally, and why saying sorry to your kids can be one of the most powerful tools a father has.

The episode also dives into cultural commentary — from Drewski’s controversial “whiteface” skit to bigger questions about comedy, racism, and the role of satire as a mirror for society.

Together, the hosts explore:

• The power of apologizing to your kids and owning your humanity.
• Finding ways to manufacture happiness in the midst of transition.
• How fatherhood reshapes vulnerability and presence.
• Why cultural skits spark backlash — and what they reveal about comedy as social commentary.
• Balancing humor and heaviness as fathers building legacy.

Quotes

“It’s really hard to be a dad. When I don’t sleep, when I feel pressure to provide, I get frustrated — but I owe it to my kids to own that and say sorry.” – JELANI


“We’re the first generation where vulnerability with your kids isn’t optional. You have to present yourself that way to raise well-rounded kids.” – SPENCER


“Sometimes you have to manufacture happiness. Obligations are real, but joy has to be created on purpose.” – SPENCER


“Let’s stop taking life so serious. Laugh through it. Apologize when you’re off. Keep the dialogue open.” – JELANI