The Courage to Seek Help: Why Therapy Isn't Just for Crisis Moments

What Are The Top Misconceptions About Therapists?

Tired of hearing that therapy is only for those in crisis or with "serious issues"? This episode shatters the myths surrounding mental health support while offering a refreshing perspective on who really benefits from therapy—spoiler alert: it's probably you.

Licensed clinical social worker Anne Chester delivers powerful insights about the preventative power of therapy, explaining why waiting until you're at your breaking point means missing the entire purpose of therapeutic support. She challenges the statistic that only 5.5% of U.S. adults experience serious mental illness, making it clear that therapy serves a much broader population—anyone experiencing the complex emotions of being human.

We explore common misconceptions about therapy, including the belief that it requires endless rehashing of childhood trauma or represents a lifelong commitment. Anne shares compelling real-world examples of clients who sought help before crisis struck—from career transitions to addressing relationship patterns that might have damaged important connections. These stories demonstrate how therapy serves as a tool for growth rather than merely crisis management.

The conversation takes an illuminating turn when Anne explains why our well-meaning friends can't replace professional support. While friends offer validation, therapists provide the neutral perspective needed to recognize patterns and challenge unhealthy behaviors. She identifies everyday signs that might indicate therapy would be beneficial: recurring relationship patterns, diminished joy, sleep disturbances, or simply feeling something's "off" but being unable to identify the source.

Whether you're struggling, curious, or somewhere in between, this episode provides the clarity and encouragement needed to take that first step toward professional support. 

To learn more about Anne Chester™, LCSW Counseling visit:
https://www.AnneChester.com
Anne Chester™, LCSW Counseling 
122 River Oaks Drive 
Southlake, Texas 76092 
817-939-7884 

Transcript

Introducing Ask Ann Chester

Speaker 1 0:04

You're listening to Ask Ann Chester. Therapy Talks, the podcast where life's tough moments meet real talk, a little humor and the expertise of Ann Chester, licensed clinical social worker. Ann helps Texan women in the middle of life navigate anxiety, depression and trauma with compassion and a no-nonsense edge. If you've ever thought there's got to be a better way, you're in the right place. And good news, you can schedule a free 15-minute consultation with Ann because, as she says, it doesn't have to be that way. Now let's dive in.

Speaker 2 0:50

Let's bust some myths wide open. Anne dives into what therapy really is, who it's for and why. Waiting until you're in crisis misses the whole point. Welcome back everyone. I'm Sophia Yvette, co-host and producer. Back in the studio today with Ann Chester, licensed clinical social worker. Ann, how are you this morning?

Speaker 3 1:13

I am doing well. How are you Sophia?

Speaker 2 1:16

I'm also doing well and it's great to be back with you for another deep dive. So this one's all about busting therapy myths and shining a light on when and why to get help. Talk to us about the top misconceptions about therapists, why you don't have to be crazy to go to therapy, and how do you know you need to go to therapy.

Speaker 3 1:40

Well, those are great questions and I get asked that all the time. Or people will make comments like well, I'm not like one of those crazy people. You see, first and foremost, when we look at statistics national statistics, whether it's the National Institute of Health or some other body that measures statistics the average number of people that have serious mental illness is five and a half percent of adults in the US. So if it's only five and a half percent of the adults, I'm not going to have a job. So you do not have to be mentally ill to come into therapy.

Speaker 3 2:16

As human beings, our life is full of experience some good, some bad and we live life in our whole entire bodies, and you have feelings, and having feelings and living life makes you a candidate for therapy. You don't have to be in crisis. It's just sometimes you're struggling to process something in life. There's a why question you can't answer. So therapy is really for people that are strong. It's for people that want to do things better. They're curious about a different way of living life, or maybe they just want to process some stuff that did happen in the past.

Speaker 2 3:01

Understood. Now, what's one stereotype about therapy clients that bothers you the most, aside from what we just discussed?

Speaker 3 3:13

That you never graduate from therapy. You should be able to graduate from therapy at some point. Maybe you go back into therapy, but you should be able to graduate. It's not permanent, or it doesn't have to be, unless you just really want it to be permanent, and it doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to rehash all of your childhood issues. So that's a big stereotype too. If I go to therapy, we're just going to unpack all these childhood issues I didn't have. If you're in a toxic work environment, we're not rehashing childhood issues.

Speaker 2 3:52

We're thinking about strategies to either cope with the environment or looking at the decision of do I need to move on Now? Can you give an example of someone who benefited from therapy before things fell apart?

Speaker 3 4:07

I can give you lots and lots of those examples.

Speaker 3 4:08

I can even give you personal examples from my own life.

Speaker 3 4:09

When there's been a change and my husband and I need to address an issue with our kids, we might go talk to a marriage counselor on how to communicate better and come together and help our kids out. But in my office when I think of cases with that, I had a young lady several years ago that came in because she had a job and it wasn't necessarily a bad job, but she just wasn't happy and in the process of therapy she realized that making a change in her life and her career was going to make her happy and she was able to do that before she just kind of fell off the ledge of depression. I've had people that come in because they have a history of some sort of trauma and they, without really being aware of it, they're projecting their own feelings on their children or a really good friend and they start noticing, hmm, I'm assigning my feelings to someone else and we talk about it and we're able to resolve whatever the trauma is without losing a relationship or damaging kids. So those would be some really concrete examples.

Speaker 2 5:21

Now, why do you think women in midlife wait so long to seek help?

Speaker 3 5:27

Well, life is busy. We're moms, we work and we hang out with our girlfriends and we're really good at talking to our girlfriends and we often feel like our girlfriends can give us the help we need. But the thing about my girlfriends and I'm sure this is true for most people is my girlfriends are on my side and they're really great at validating my feelings, but they're not so great at challenging me when I need to think about something different or maybe looking at how I was part of the problem. So a therapist is a neutral person. They're not your friend, they don't hang out with you on a regular basis, and so when you talk to a therapist, they're able to ask you maybe some probing questions that you didn't think about. They're not necessarily there to validate that your perspective is correct. Sometimes we do that and we do that a lot, but a lot of times we're asking that question so that maybe you get a different perspective.

Speaker 2 6:28

Now. Thank you for sharing that with us. And what are some everyday signs someone might need therapy, even if they're functioning?

Speaker 3 6:38

So this is an example I use with my clients all the time. Sometimes we get stuck in relationship patterns that we don't even know. So my example of that is when I just get really warm, fuzzy people feelings around a certain person and I know what that feeling feels like. That is a red flag for me that I can't maintain a healthy relationship with that person, usually because that person has some kind of situation where I feel like I need to fix or rescue them. So when you notice that you're in the same relationship pattern same song, second verse, different person that's a reason to go to therapy right then and there. Because you want to know why do I keep getting into this situation? Therapy, right then and there. Because you want to know why do I keep getting into this situation? That other person may not be a problem. They may not be. I hear a lot of people say, oh, that person was just a narcissist. That person may not in fact be a narcissist. It may be the way that you engage with that type of person and a therapy issue for you.

Speaker 3 7:46

Another big one is when you kind of lose your joy or your motivation and energy to do life. You find yourself more exhausted than usual If you find yourself constantly replaying things in your head or asking those what if? Questions, and they keep you up at night. Maybe you have some sleep disturbance. Sometimes just going through a big transition, you had to move for a job. You had no choice.

Speaker 3 8:06

I know I had a client that lived here in the state of Texas for years and years and years. Her family was here and her company was like you can either move to Atlanta or you don't have a job, and she had to make a decision on what she was going to do with that. And that was a great topic to come to therapy with. Sometimes you're just curious and you just want to grow and do life differently, or you just feel like something's off and you just can't quite put your finger on it. Those are big signs that say, hey, I need to go to therapy. You know it's not A shameful thing. To go to. Therapy is just getting a different perspective. And whether you're in crisis or you're navigating change or wondering if there's more to life than being in survival mode, therapy helps you find some clarity and strength and peace and you don't have to do life alone. It doesn't have to be that way.

Speaker 2 9:05

Most definitely, I think, in certain times of life life we all need a little therapy yeah, and therapists often go to therapy themselves that's interesting. Now, do you have any final words of wisdom for our listeners today on the in and outs of therapy? Who needs needs it, why you need it and when it's beneficial?

Speaker 3 9:31

So the first thing I like to say to people is, if you have found a therapist and you don't feel like you're benefiting with them, it may just be the wrong fit. We're not all the same. We have different approaches and different personalities. It's good to interview a therapist, it's good to take that 15-minute consultation and get a feel for what they're like. So just because you start with one therapist doesn't mean that's the therapist you need to stay with, and I've even had patients that outgrew me and needed a different approach and we had to talk about that.

Speaker 3 10:06

So that's one thing to recognize. It's not a one size fits all. And then, secondly, when you're going to therapy, it's not the most comfortable experience. You may like your therapist, it might be pleasant, but the therapist is there to challenge you and not be your friend, and peace is not found in your friend and peace is not found in you know. I feel good all the time, you know, or I feel great with this person. We find peace a lot of times through growing in our own issues and accepting changes in life and responding to things differently than we had in the past. So I encourage you, when you go to therapy, go with an open mind. You know when you're defensive. Acknowledge your defensive and that the therapist is hitting something for you, but also acknowledge that sometimes it's just not a good fit and you need to see someone else.

Speaker 2 11:02

Well, anne, thank you so much for calling out what so many of us think but never say. We appreciate the clarity and we'll see you next time on Ask Anne. Chester Therapy Talks. Have a great day.

Speaker 3 11:17

You too, thanks, sophia.

Speaker 1 11:24

Thanks for tuning in to Ask Anne Chester Therapy Talks. Thanks for tuning in to Ask Ann Chester Therapy Talks. If today's episode hit home and you live in Texas, you can schedule a free 15-minute consultation with Ann at annchestercom or just give her a call at 817-939-7884. Let's start the conversation, because it doesn't have to be that way Until next time. Take care.