The ARMC

If you Met Yourself Today... Would You Trust Her?

• Kylie & Gina • Season 3 • Episode 8

Share episode

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 30:09

Send us Fan Mail

We ask a blunt question: if you met yourself today, would you trust her. We draw the line between being seen as trustworthy and actually trusting your own no, then set a seven-day experiment to rebuild that self-trust with small, consistent acts.

• difference between external trustworthiness and internal self-trust
• people-pleasing, overexplaining, and resentment as self-betrayal
• boundaries as maintenance, not meanness
• anxiety, uncertainty, and trusting process over perfect plans
• experiments vs goals for low-drama growth
• saying no cleanly and keeping one small promise daily
• rest guilt, the “easy button,” and invisible emotional debts
• simple practices to protect time and energy

“DM us your experiment or just your word started. Let us know and check back with yourself and even us in seven days”
“Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok at the ARMC”
“Remember, you’re not broken, you’re becoming”


Support the show

Welcome And The Uncomfortable Question

SPEAKER_01

You're listening to the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club, the podcast for moms who love their kids deeply and still feel anxious, exhausted, and overstimulated.

SPEAKER_00

Here, we talk about the messy stuff, the thoughts we don't say out loud, the pressure to do it all, and the journey back to ourselves. Progress over perfection always. Let's go. Okay, I want to start with a question that made me uncomfortable the first time I thought about it. Because as Gina likes to say, it's 2026 and we're doing it uncomfortable. All of the things that are uncomfortable.

Trustworthy To Others Vs Trusting Yourself

SPEAKER_01

Yep, and that's usually how we know it's a good one.

SPEAKER_00

If you met yourself today, not who you used to be, not who you're trying to become, would you trust her? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I'm pretty awesome. I'm pretty trustworthy. I am I am trustworthy. I will, you know what though, in bringing this up, I do want to say something really quick though. I think that there are times where people and I've had people think that I'm not trustworthy.

SPEAKER_00

I know you can't see us, but I'm intently staring at her because I'm scared to death of what is going to fall out of her fucking mouth.

SPEAKER_02

So let's go.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_01

I think that some there are people, I'm sure, in my life that I've met along the way that if um may think in their minds if I am or am not trustworthy, right? And they may not think I am. Because I think that there's been so many times now.

SPEAKER_00

I'm scouring. I'm just like I'm gonna give a play-by-play today because that's what I feel like doing. Now I'm scouring. Like, who doesn't trust you? Because they're fucking trees.

SPEAKER_02

They don't know me. If you listen to our last episode, you'll know what we're talking about.

SPEAKER_01

From now on, that is our code. You're just a tree. You're just a tree. Um I don't know. I think that there's a lot of times where you know, I can talk to somebody and tell them, you know, here's my truce. I, you know, like people, don't like people, did this, did that, whatever. And the I remember even there was an employee that worked for me, and I um really got along with this person well. And I heard after that that person left that the one comment made was just so you know, whatever you don't trust Gina. And I just started laughing because I never did anything that wasn't trustworthy, but I just think that there's times where people don't know a whole story, don't talk about it, and then they think somebody's not trustworthy.

SPEAKER_00

Does that make sense? What I'm saying, yeah. Does it make sense? I want to know who this person is so I can go kick him in the face.

SPEAKER_01

But I mean, I think there's times where I had I had a guy, and I really don't care for him. And of course I don't care for him because he's I mean, he's that this is a different person that he had said he didn't know me for very well with the old old company that I worked for. Um, and he actually told somebody that I'm negative.

SPEAKER_00

You should have been like a new Mac Kylie.

SPEAKER_01

I'm a negative person. And I was like, number one reason why I don't like him, because he's stupid and he is a tree. But I was like, negative, I'm not negative, but I think what he didn't like about me was that if you have meetings, I just say what I the truth. I'm not again, I'm not a mean, ignorant person. I don't like sit around and like say crazy stuff, but I do tell you, like, if even if at work, if you're to tell me this is what we need to do, and if I think it's stupid, I will tell you that I think your idea is dumb, but I will try it. I don't think there's anything wrong with doing that. I don't think it's what he liked about me. So I mean, like he didn't want you to be honest. He didn't want me to be honest. I don't think people like honesty. They say they do, but they don't. You know, you're probably not wrong. Are you kind of like you get where I'm going with this? Yes. Or am I just talking like crazy and everybody just says, What is she talking about? No, I get it. I get it. It's why I say not everybody likes me. I'm sure I'm a tree to somebody. Not very many, hopefully. And if you are, you don't care. I don't care. Right. Just like him. You think I'm negative, bite me because I'm not. But if that's what you believe, it's fine. I don't care. Like, I don't care if somebody says, Oh my god, Gina told me this and that, and then all of a sudden I saw this or that. And now I'm I don't know. I'm kind of questioning. Question all you want. If I told you something, it was the truth. Your truth. I don't know. Maybe that didn't make sense to me. I just, you know. I just sometimes throw it out there. There's sometimes people that don't, I think don't always ask us after they see something that they maybe can interpret however they want. You know what I mean? You assume, which you should never do because you make an ass out of you and me. You should never assume, but sometimes we do, and then sometimes you might think somebody's not trustworthy, or maybe they did something that you're like questioning, and maybe you should talk to them.

SPEAKER_00

Or a therapist. Either way. Okay, anyways, either way. I I don't even remember the question.

Honesty, Labels, And Being Called Negative

SPEAKER_01

So you had said if you met yourself today, um, would you trust her? Yes, I would. I'm very trustworthy.

SPEAKER_00

Go on. So not as a mom or a partner, as a woman, with your time, with your boundaries and your decisions. You've 1000% trust yourself. Yes.

SPEAKER_01

So you're perfect. No, I just think I'm trustworthy. I'm not perfect and I've done things, but I wouldn't, I mean, if somebody even said, Well, I heard you did, I'll say, I mean, ask me and I'd tell you. I don't really, I don't, I think the thing about is have I made mistakes in my life? Yes. Have I probably, especially when I was younger, have I ever done something against who somebody maybe said something, done something wrong? Yes. I'm not, I'm not a perfect person. I'm human. Have I ever gossiped about somebody? Yes. Have I ever made fun of somebody? Yes. I mean, growing up, you I mean, who the hell hasn't? Right. That's called being human. But I think I've learned, I've grown, and I've definitely changed into where I'm very, I would definitely if I I wish there was more of me in this world, you know. I need a Gina in my life. Fuck you.

SPEAKER_00

I'm trying, but I don't trust myself, apparently. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

I want to I no, I hate this. Well, trust isn't just something though that we give other people, it is something we either have with ourselves or we don't. So do you trust yourself? Would you trust you? Be honest.

SPEAKER_00

For me, it's saying yes when my whole body is saying no. The part we don't talk about. Resentment is often self-betrayal. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

I am growing. That's the whole goal. Well, okay, we've talked about before, anyways. I mean, believe me, I've had to grow through my life. So me being the old decrepit one over here, I definitely have grown. That's why I say I can look back at different ages and say, I mean, I had to learn some different things along the way. I don't think I ever intentionally tried to do anything wrong to anybody. That doesn't mean I never did anything wrong. You know what I mean? But I never did that with intention. Yeah. But I learned from any of my mistakes and I grew from them.

SPEAKER_00

So I think I was a tad bit thrown off because I feel like there is a difference between like being trustworthy and trusting yourself. Do I feel like I am trustworthy? Abs fucking lutely. Like I have morals, I stand by them, I'm trustworthy, I can keep a secret, I'm a good person, you know, all of those things. So I do feel like I'm trustworthy. But do I trust myself? For what?

SPEAKER_01

What do you mean? What do you mean like trust yourself? What do you trust? Like, do you trust yourself?

SPEAKER_00

For what? For my time, my boundaries, my life, where I'm going, where I've you know what I mean? Like, you don't trust yourself for that? I have a lot of question marks and a lot of uncertainty right now, and that makes me feel anxious or lost a little bit. Like I don't, you know, I I like to plan and I like to have a plan, and from a very early age, this is how I not this. This is not how I saw my life.

SPEAKER_01

When I was growing up, I thought that I would be one full of anxiety person, right?

SPEAKER_00

But I like to know where I'm going, and I feel right now I'm like unsure. I don't know. I don't know where this the podcast leads us, and I don't know where my job's gonna ultimately lead me.

Boundaries, People-Pleasing, And Self-Betrayal

SPEAKER_01

Okay, but don't you trust that I guess this is where I come from. So I can say things. I feel like I'm trustworthy. So, like if there was like as a friend, co-worker, partner, whatever, I find that I'm very trustworthy. As far as like trusting, even to not, even though I feel like do I know a hundred percent what my future looks like? 100% no. I don't know that you ever 100% would. I think you have goals and ideas.

SPEAKER_00

Am I trusting the decisions that I'm making every single day? Are the decisions that I'm making every single day bettering my future? Right. That is where I don't you don't trust. I don't trust right now. Yeah, see, I I do.

SPEAKER_01

You're helping me. I'm I'm growing. I trust that I will always question myself. I will always look inside to see if I'm part of a problem. I'll always check myself and I'll always rethink if I did something and I feel like first of all, I also think you have to sometimes try shit to see if it's the right avenue. And you might go, oh, that was wrong. That doesn't mean it was wrong. You know what I mean? Or like not that's why I trust myself not to do something stupid or make myself like ruin my life or do something horrible or yeah, I don't think I'm gonna go commit murder.

SPEAKER_00

Murder, you idiot.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, like fucking. I don't trust myself to not commit murder at this point. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

I'm like a fucking wrecking ball. I that's a see I try, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

I think I I think that's a bit for me. I guess I when I look at it, the thing about trusting, I think is about, you know, do I trust myself to make sound decisions? Yes, yes, because I'm always willing to look back at myself. And if I make mistakes, I trust myself to not make the mistake so full-blown that I'm so self-driving.

SPEAKER_00

So self-trust erodes quietly. It's not just one big thing, it's a it's a thousand little things where we keep overriding ourselves. So, like canceling plans if we need or overexplaining. That's where I feel like if I make a decision, I have to explain it to everyone. And I want to just be confident in the my decisions that I'm making, that I don't have to explain to anyone. I don't have to get feedback from everyone. Like I need to make a decision, I need to stand firm in it and not give a rat's ass what anybody else thinks. Like that's just where I feel I guess I'm equating it more to confidence. Yeah. See, to me, that's confidence. Yeah. Than self-trust.

SPEAKER_01

Than self-trust. Self-trust would be, I mean, that you have to know you have. I guess to me, I like this. There's boundaries for every aspect of your life. I have boundaries when it comes to maybe, you know, your my family in general, you know, like my immediate family, kids, you know, grandkids, husband, parents, whatever it is. Um, friendships, you know, work. I mean, I think that those are all certain things can be, you know, it's hard to sometimes put down a boundary.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so I'm gonna ask you this.

SPEAKER_00

What do you say yes to that you don't actually mean? Or for you, are there times where you should say no? But you say yes.

SPEAKER_01

I okay, I will I will say I probably say yes so that it just seems like if your hand if you are dealing with me, it seems like it's I'm it's I'm easy. I'm low maintenance. That's even true at work. I'd never want to be the person that can that the people are saying, Oh my god. Like they're so high.

SPEAKER_00

But you're also exhausted. So sometimes you have to say no. You can't be everything for everybody.

SPEAKER_01

No, and the freaking and I and that is where sometimes I will say is probably that's probably my biggest downfall if I had anything, which is a is more of a boundary, is that I just really want to be the easy button. But see, that's what makes me good in my work because I'm the easy button. I'm the person that you want to call because I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna take, I will take the extra time with you. I will do more than somebody else will do. So when it comes to competition, you're getting more out of me than you're gonna get out of my competition. You know what I mean? So, like I want to be that for all day at work. It is kind of it is hard to not have that same idea going towards my family. And it is what it makes me exhausted. There's no doubt about it. There's times where definitely I crash and burn a little bit or get a little frustrated, or sometimes I feel like I get frustrated because people don't, I feel like nobody notices that I do that. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00

Resentment.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I think if people like sometimes even just said, are you sure sure you're gonna do this? Because I mean, hello, like you take on a lot. I think if even somebody just said, I would still say I appreciate, I would just appreciate the the acknowledgement. I still would take on too much. That's fine, because that's just who I am. But like it would help my brain not, I think, become so overloaded just to acknowledge what I am doing.

SPEAKER_00

So you said you're the easy button, but I think that we I think we confuse being flexible with being trustworthy. Flexibility is great, but self-abandonment is not. Like being flexible and easy, but not having any boundaries, like you gotta be careful because you've also got to take care of yourself and protect yourself. Yes.

Anxiety, Uncertainty, And Life Plans

SPEAKER_01

And I will say sometimes I feel like when I protect myself, it makes people think like I'm being, I don't know. And I know it's a me thing. This isn't, I don't even think this is, I'll be honest with you, it's probably not even true when I say this. It probably some other people will be listening to it. My kids can be listening to this and say, I don't think that, but I can honestly tell I if I were to say, I really can't do that, or this is too much for me, it's the too much button, you know. But then all of a sudden they'd be like, Okay, well, I mean, what are you doing? That's too much. Like, I'm not doing enough. I always feel like I'm not doing enough. That's a me thing. That's why I say competition is against myself. It's probably my biggest downfall at the same time because I'm always competing against myself. Can I do more? If my husband will tell you, so and my dad does this too. It's kind of funny. So if I walk into a room and the TV's on, I will stand and watch the TV show. I might stand there even for 10, 15 minutes. I will not sit. My dad does the same thing. He'll come in sometimes, just stand there. And so he's brought it up to me. He's like, I think you guys are the only two people I've ever seen that come in and watch TV standing up. And I'm like, because I probably could be doing something. So if I'm sitting there, I literally feel like when people even come in and see me laying on the couch, I my mind, they think I've been laying there all day. When I've probably done 25 other things all day, I finally got time to lay on my couch. And it, but it makes me like feel like you think I've been laying there, even though you say nothing. You didn't say that to me. That's a me thing. So I will stand, watch 10 minutes, because a commercial probably come on. I could probably go do a couple dishes or I could go throw some laundry and I could do something.

SPEAKER_00

But if I sit, I may not want to get up. See, my mom and I just had this conversation because y'all need to check your Netflix plans because at some point in time they took everyone and increased them to the highest plan. So it's like$24.99 a month when like the lowest is$7.99 a month. At some point, they did an update, and like my mom and my brother both mentioned it. They were paying$24.99.

SPEAKER_01

So they went, Hell, I better check my shit.

SPEAKER_00

Seriously, I want you to check it.

SPEAKER_01

Um, and so what's it giving me? Anything, is it giving me something? Or just said we just wanted your dumb ass to get paid charge$24.99.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I mean, it was just automatic. Automatic didn't no commercials.

SPEAKER_01

Screw you and your no commercial. So we I hate them commercial. I do, I have a little bit. I even had to, I was just signing up for like Hulu and HBO, and I even told Tom, okay, like for$8 more. Okay, we could get rid of the commercials. Do we do it or do we not do it? And he's like, I go, but it's eight dollars. As much as it doesn't sound like shit, I'm still like, that's still eight dollars.$96. I'm not kidding you. I was watching a show though yesterday with a commercial. I'm like, I freaking want to throw this shit. So it's so funny.

SPEAKER_00

So my mom, so we switched, we switched phone carriers, and through our new carrier, she gets free Netflix. So I canceled her$24.99 plan and she was signing up for$7.99. And literally within hours, she texts me and she's like, I don't know how I feel about these commercials. And I was like, freaking hate them. I was like, Are you kidding me? That's the only good, that's the only way I get no so she was funny because she said, and now I want a KFC bowl.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, that is one thing because it'll make you hungry. That's what my husband always talks about. He said, This thing is seriously making me starving.

SPEAKER_00

I said, Are you freaking kidding me? That's the only time I get things done. Like, that is how I motivate myself. Like on commercials, you'll get up and you'll unload the dish before. Okay. On commercials, you'll go ahead and sew.

SPEAKER_01

See, and but that's why I now see. But that's why though it's the only time I'll sit my ass on the couch and not move. See, if there's no commercials, I will sit and watch the show. So, like, I can I'll be like, okay, I need to get my stuff done and then I'm gonna go sit on the couch. Because if I didn't get it done before I go sit my butt on the couch with no commercial shows that I can sit, I will watch them all the time when I go to bed.

SPEAKER_00

So, see, I'm gonna save$96 and get commercials because I'm more productive. I need to go back to my standing watching TV when the commercial comes on, I go to do something.

SPEAKER_01

I'm can't the bad thing about me, and this is why I probably think people think this is because once I sit down like that, I I'm done, I want to be done. Like I want to sit. I mean, that doesn't mean I don't ever I even though when I talk about like I stand there and watch TV and then I do that, it's until like a certain time. Like it might be till like 7 or 7:30. And then by then I'm like, okay, some I used to sometimes even do it till 8:30 or 9, but I've kind of made it more now. I don't have kids running around that I need to worry about. So maybe by 7:30, I'll be like, okay, I just need to sit and watch and enjoy TV and then go to bed. But before that hour, I love TV. I would be TV.

SPEAKER_00

I love it so much.

SPEAKER_01

I would be more apt to then during commercials go get stuff done and not sit because the moment I sit at that point, I want to be done. I don't want to get back up off that couch unless I have to go to the bathroom. Otherwise, I want to watch my shows.

SPEAKER_00

But see, that's just I guess it depends on what I'm watching too. But I don't anyway. So I looked it up and I'm like, well, for$17.99, and I'm like, that's$10 more dollars. It's$120 a year. And she's like, commercials, it is.

Confidence, Self-Trust, And Saying No

SPEAKER_01

It's the truth. When you sit and you think about it, you're like, this is maybe dumb, but I swear to God, we were watching, we were watching the movie Roleplay. Have you seen that? So it's pretty good. It's not the greatest show ever, but I mean it is, it's a pretty good show. Um, and it had commercials and it was on Prime. It was killing me. And even I was like, why do we have this many commercials? I swear they put more commercials in than if you watch a show just to aggravate you, so you'll pay the money. Oh, 1000%. Seriously, we just watched a show for five minutes and you're back on a commercial. Come on. And then you might go for a while and then they give you a commercial, then all of a sudden be again like five, 10 minutes, and then they do another. I'd be like, You're doing this because you want me to pay more money.

SPEAKER_00

See, but then I I doom scroll probably through commercials and then yeah. Or I get up and do something properly. I have to get to be.

SPEAKER_01

It is when I usually like, well, I guess if there's a commercial, I can do something because I can't stand watching them anymore. Okay, so let's pivot for a second.

SPEAKER_00

What are you watching on HBO Max, Gina? Well, I just finished the pit.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, I love the pit. Yes, I love it. You finished it, you couldn't have finished it. They're they're dropping episodes every week. Well, I finished where it got me up to and then it stopped. So I'm now I have to get back to my now. I have to start the every time I'm a bobber or whatever. But um, I I do, I really, really like that one. And then found. I'm finishing, I'm in the the I don't know, middle of the second season or something like that. Loving it.

SPEAKER_00

Um the pit back to the pit for a second. The pit is on HBO Max, and it is the original doctor from ER back in the day. If you ever watched ER. And um, now it's Dr. Robbie on the pit. And it is a season is just one shift at a hospital in Pittsburgh. It's so good. It's so good. It probably isn't great for the people, the medical professionals in the world. I know sometimes shows like that get on nurses. You know what, though?

SPEAKER_01

I read something that they were saying that they have actually a lot of people who work in these situations who say it's about time they finally put a show on that like kind of shows more of what goes on. And um, even though I do think some of the stuff I'm like, okay, like they don't allow family members to stand there and watch as they're cutting you open. But they do a lot on the pit. That's the only thing I'm like, I mean, they would make them leave. I mean, let's be honest. But other than that, they said though that they feel that um it kind of actually is shares more with their families and friends what they really go through every single day. So I do kind of like the how it shows, I don't know, how it just entangles these family members and the stuff that happens.

SPEAKER_00

And I don't know, it was good. I like it. I like it. I love the pit. And then the other one that I'm trying to get Gina to start is on Apple TV and it's called Shrinking.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, which I will start watching, but I'm not watching it until I finish Found because I'm totally messed up. I have to finish Found. Once I finish it though, which I told you, I'm all I'm not, I'll finish that this weekend for sure. And then I'm gonna turn that one on and see how that one goes.

SPEAKER_00

Yes. Found is good too. Found is um someone that was kidnapped is a little girl, and she now has gone on to start her own practice image. Finding lost kids.

SPEAKER_01

Well, not necessarily kids, though. Lost people. Just lost people, people that are like, you know, taken, lost, whatever. And then she kidnaps her person that had taken her years before. And he actually is helping her solve cases. It's totally cool. And he's Zach Morris from Save Bell. Which is kind of funny to me because on one hand, I you just think of him as like this upbeat, happy kid.

SPEAKER_00

And now all of a sudden he's kind of like for being a sociopath. I still like him. Likeable.

SPEAKER_01

This is the bad thing. And this is like um what's that other show I loved? And it's a long, long, long one where the criminal. Oh my god, why is it not on the tip of my tongue? The guy that's the criminal, and he um like a national kind of thing. He's always flying. Oh my god, this is like a super popular movie. Anyways, everybody gets to love him too. Like, I think that's what this guy's like. Dexter. I like Dexter. I really like Dexter, dude. No, not Dexter. I mean, you gotta kinda had to like him. He was cleaning up in the world, you know. But I know I really like him on there. He's um he is something I can tell as time goes on. The more and more you just you have you're gonna like like him, and then you're like, this is kind of wrong that you like him because you're not supposed to like bad people, but you kind of didn't know. You know what? You kind of didn't.

SPEAKER_00

I okay, okay, okay. I I think these TV producers are on to something because there's also a new series out there called Memory of a Killer. Oh, yeah, I want to watch that. And it's Patrick Dimsey, and he's a hitman, but you just like I think I text you like Patrick Dimsey is hot. Patrick Dimsey murdering people is really fucking hot.

SPEAKER_01

It must be something they're making these villains of these shows be really awesome people, and um but I think because I think they they do show that they have a human side one way or the other, even if it's distorted. And so you kind of find like you almost feel compassion in a way to the respect. So I'm liking that show so much.

The Easy Button Trap And Resentment

SPEAKER_00

So Memory of a Killer is um there are just two episodes out total, and so it's a new series and it's dropping weekly, but he is a hitman and he's battling early onset Alzheimer's. So it's the first two episodes were were awesome. I it's not frequent that I will watch something twice, but I will say I have watched um shrinking, a new series just started. So I watched the first episode of episode or of series three. Not series, that's not the word I'm looking for. What's the word I'm looking for? Season, season three, episode one. I watched it and then I started watching the whole thing over again. And then Memory of a Killer. There's only two episodes out, but it it's just one that you can you're gonna love. So yeah, some shows to check out.

unknown

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01

Well, that's totally off subject of everything that we're talking about. I said I was gonna pivot talking.

SPEAKER_00

I said I was gonna pivot. Pivot back. I don't even know what we're talking about. Because now I've got back Patrick Dempsey on the minds.

SPEAKER_01

So we're talking about self-trust. That's what we're talking about. And commercials. And we have to remember it's about follow-through and honoring your no. And, you know, about if you met yourself today. Would you believe her when she said, I've got you.

SPEAKER_00

I've got you. We're gonna figure it out. I've got you. Yeah, we're getting there.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

We're definitely getting there.

SPEAKER_01

I think so. I think that um I do think that everyone needs to make sure that they spend some time to reflect if you are trustworthy, if you um, and if you also can trust your instincts, I guess you would say. Right? I mean, that's one of the it's your instincts that sets your boundaries. We're not setting goals, we're running on experiments.

SPEAKER_00

Okay. For the next seven days, we are each committing to one self-trust experiment. Not to be perfect, just to observe. My experiment is saying no without explaining.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's a good one. Uh, no justification, no essay. Nope. Just a clean nope. And sitting with the discomfort.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_01

Right. So mine is keeping one promise to myself every day. Uh small, like uh maybe well, I don't know. Right now it's too cold to say I'm gonna go for a walk. You love to work. Or stopping work when I said I would, which I will honestly tell you, the company I work for now, I do love that. I don't feel like that's not really my an issue so much. I do feel like I have a good, you know, bearing on that. So I have to figure out what I don't even know what I would say is my promise I'm gonna keep every day. I know what it is. I'm going to make sure that I have something I can't say daily because I don't know if I take do this daily yet, but I could at least weekly. I used to, even the kids were young, I used to always have at least a show that was a show only I enjoyed. So I would for one hour go in my room. Nobody was allowed to come in that room for one hour.

SPEAKER_02

There you go.

SPEAKER_01

It was once a week. And it really was good for me because it was a show I enjoyed. I did find a lot of times I'd have to shut the door completely, sometimes even maybe lock it, because and I'd have to say, I am going in here. I am watching this show. So I'm going to go back to the show.

SPEAKER_00

My kids are so damn savage. I was going to the bathroom the other day, and I don't normally even lock the door, like whatever, but I needed a moment. I needed to go to the bathroom. I locked the door. My kid goes and gets a butter knife to unlock the door and come in. I'm like, what? The door was locked to tell me like the most bizarre. Like it was like, I don't care. I'm going to the bathroom. Leave me alone. There are no boundaries in this house. We've got to set some boundaries, people. Gosh darn.

SPEAKER_01

I'm so like. That's why I think we always have to have set some sort of time for ourselves.

SPEAKER_00

The door was shut.

SPEAKER_01

It was kind of an indication. Maybe you need to put a sign on the bathroom door that just is a stop sign.

SPEAKER_00

Oh Lord.

SPEAKER_01

I'm like, or you know, like what is it in college, you know, where they wrap the tie around the door, not meaning don't enter. I'm a little busy.

SPEAKER_00

I was gonna say, do you know what that actually means? Because I think you know. But anyway, self-trust isn't built with grand gestures, it's built with consistency. We just have to be consistent and be consistent, consistent with ourselves. We want you to choose your own experiment. Here are a few ideas, but you'll know what you need. Saying no without explaining, not overfunctioning for others, keeping one promise to yourself daily, asking for what you need once, letting something be good enough. Pick one, just one.

SPEAKER_01

This will feel uncomfortable, but that's how we know it's working. You might feel guilty or selfish, or even maybe a little anxious. Because that's what we do here.

Productivity, Commercials, And Rest Guilt

SPEAKER_00

Right. But it doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. It means you're doing something new. And self-trust isn't loud, it's quiet, but it changes everything. If you met yourself today and didn't fully trust her, that's okay. You're like me. We've got that in common. And trust can be rebuilt. One kept promise, one honored no, one week, hell, one day, one minute at a time. DM us your experiment or just your word started. Let us know and check back with yourself and even us in seven days. You're rebuilding.

SPEAKER_01

Thanks for spending time with us.

SPEAKER_00

Take what you need, leave what you don't, and be gentle with yourself. And if you want to stay connected, follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok at the ARMC. And remember, you're not broken, you're becoming.