Your Future Is Being Built by What You Do Today

Bernie Gallerani grew up on food stamps in HUD housing. Today he's built a life of freedom, wealth, and impact, and he did it by refusing to let comfort win. In this episode, Bernie asks a haunting question: is your future self watching you right now? He unpacks how every phone call you avoid, every excuse you make, and every moment of discipline you choose is casting a vote for who you become 15 to 20 years from now. This isn't a feel-good pep talk. It's a direct, uncomfortable look at why your future family's life is hidden inside your current work ethic.

Transcript

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Hello, everybody. Bernie Gallarani. I'm bringing you another episode of Success is Not Convenient. Boy, I'll tell you what, I have an interesting one for us today. Here's the question for you Is your future watching you right now? And the answer to that is yes. We're gonna go into a deep dive here on your future watching your current behavior. And is your current behavior allowing you to have the future that you dream of? Because it all starts with what you're doing right now that really shows its face years down the line, all the struggles and all of the things that you do it quietly where no one's really paying much attention to you. I want us to kind of go mentally into 20 years, 15 years down the line. And I know that's a tough one to grasp because we're so far away from that time frame. But right now, your future self, your 15, 20-year-old future self, your 15 to 20 years later than where you are right now. It's watching your behavior and it's testing you for what is to come. Many of us don't ever reach the future dreams because the future looks at us quitting, looks at our lack of preparation. And that's really on upon us. And everything we do right now is what shows our future in the future. It shows who we are and what we're about. And what I think the challenge for a lot of us is that we see successful people, we forget about all the things that people have to go through because you see successful people, but you don't really pay much attention to all the things they had to do to become successful. See, there's a version of you that's in the future watching every single day, and every decision that you make today is about what you're gonna do in the future, watching whether or not you quit, watching whether or not you delay in making actions or taking actions. And there it's watching whether you keep making excuses for the reasons why you're not successful. It's watching whether or not you finally decide to become the person that you keep talking about wanting to become. I get to see it all the time and coaching people all the time about the dreams that they constantly have for themselves. And it makes me sad because they can't even get out of the way enough to have a future that's worth bragging about, a future worth people being admired for. Your future is not disconnected from your current behavior, your future is being built by it. Most people think life changes in a giant moment. It usually doesn't. It changes in small daily decisions, small daily decisions. And it stays in through consistency and wearing down your own comfort habits. You got to wear those down in time, things become successful. And you look back and you connect the dots and you realize how much you've succeeded, right? Getting up early and making just one more phone call than you're feeling comfortable with. Staying completely disciplined when nobody else is watching you. That's probably the hardest part, is we admire people who've done really great things. But staying disciplined when nobody's paying any attention to you, when you're not getting the accolades, that's where the accolades come in. It's it's it's it's tough because as a coach and a trainer and somebody who really appreciates the fact that it gets quiet most of the time, it's when you're when you're not being watched, what are you doing? It's having the hard conversations, it's saving money instead of spending it. It's working when emotions say stop, continuing when results haven't actually shown up yet. I see that constantly. They give it a little bit of shot, and then they don't people don't uh grow fast enough in that, and then they quit. They're not just quitting on the activity, they're quitting on their future. See, this is where the future is built. Every person listening to this has dreamed about a different life. I know it, the different life than you have today. I have a great life, but I also dream about a better life in one that is even more so powerful, a better business, more freedom in my life, financial peace, having a bigger impact, having a better marriage, having more confidence in yourself, more control, a life where stress doesn't dominate every single thought you have. You know what I'm talking about? We might be shaking our head and going, okay, well, maybe uh Bernie, you're you're off base on me. I don't think so. But dreaming alone changes absolutely nothing. You've got to actually do something about it. A dream without action becomes torture in your life. I get to see it. I mean, whoever's watching this, if you're patting yourself on the back and go, hey, listen, man, I've got everything I ever want, we need to dream a little bit bigger because eventually your mind starts showing up what's possible. Because eventually your mind starts showing you what's possible while your behavior keeps you stuck where you are. That creates frustration and internal conflict inside of you. It creates anger and resentment inside of people if they don't get a chance to fulfill the dreams they always dream about. What is it that you really want out of life and why don't you have it is the question. And we can sit there and blame other people and go, well, you don't understand. And you know, that's fine, I don't understand. But I also have my own story. It's not that you're not incapable, but it's because deep down you know that you're capable of doing more. The future version of you, the future version of who you think you are, the future version of you already exists in imagination. You can see them, you know it, you feel it, you touch, you can kind of like, oh my God, this sounds like it'd be really great. You can feel them. You can picture the house, the business, and the confidence that you need to have, the peace, the amount of great, amazing vacations, the financial freedom that you'll have, the ability to help your family. See, here's the thing that I've always took on as a high-level responsibility. I don't ask for anybody else to have this vision. I don't even ask my spouse to have it, my kids to have it, my parents to give it to me. It doesn't even matter. It's my responsibility. Nobody's responsible for my family success but me. I'm not blaming anybody else. If we got all crap we got to deal with and it prevents us from moving forward, then that's your problem. That's not the truth, though. It's just your story. But that future version of you is silently asking one question. And there's, are you willing to become the person required to create me? And me is the person that you dream of 15 to 20 years from now. Do you have what it takes? Because everybody wants the outcome. Very few people want the transformation. See, success without sacrifice, wealth without any sort of discipline, confidence without any future, growth without discomfort, and leadership without pressure. But life doesn't work that way. That's not how it works. Those things are developed through all of those. The future rewards behavior, not wishes. You don't get anything with wishes. You get it with behavior and consistency. All your thoughts have to become actions, and everything starts with a thought. Everything starts with a thought. Think about this: everything that you see, phones and TVs, and in social media, in cars, and clothes, it started with somebody having a thought that created action. Everything starts with a thought. Every company, every empire, every invention, every moment and every transformation started with a thought. No different than thoughts and ideas that you have. But first it was an idea. Then somebody moved and somebody took action. There might have been 10,000 people that had that idea, but somebody moved on it and made it a success. Most people never move. That's the biggest problem. It's kind of sad because your life is so much more than that. That's why the average person lives average life. I'm going to say this again. We live an average life because we don't want to be in any sort of discomfort. Not because anybody lacks intelligence. There's a lot of smart people because they never consistently acted on the thoughts that could have changed everything forever. Your life changes when thoughts turn into action. Action. That's the key. Moving forward, taking action, plowing through things, regardless of how difficult they are. Not motivation, not inspiration, and not even consuming content is action. Action is a bridge between vision and reality. Why most people stop? Because behavior change is an emotional warfare constantly. We're just so busy being comfortable, and no one wants to be uncomfortable. I can't even tell you how many times I hear people like, oh, that's hard. Life is hard. Life is hard if you're wealthy, and life is hard if you're poor. You just get to choose your hard. See, you're fighting your fear, you're fighting the doubt that you have inside of yourself. Let's just face it. We're fighting some laziness, some comfort there. A lot of insecurity. Like people don't want to take any risk because they're insecure, right? They don't want to be rejected. I'm just tired. Well, we're all tired. You're tired if you're broken, if you're tired if you're rich. So you get to choose whether or not you want to be tired broke or tired rich. We're so stuck in like the old habits that we have and how we behave, and it's just what we know. You know, they the old identities. That's just not me, right? If every time, oh, that's just not who I am. Well, you can change all that. People think, well, that's much as my personality. It's just one you've accepted. Your current behaviors are addicted to your comfort. I'm going to say this in a different way. The way you act today, the way you believe today, is your addiction to you being comfortable. Your future requires discomfort. The question is, are you willing to do it? You know, it's it's so fun to talk to people as I get an opportunity to meet so many professional people around the country and uh get a chance to talk to all sorts of people at different events that I go to. And I always have the same thing. It's like, well, why don't you get out of that thinking process? Your future requires you to have some discomfort. That's the war of it all. That's the difficulty at all. You don't become successful because it's easy. You become successful because eventually your desire for a different life becomes stronger than your attachment to the comfort. I'm going to say this to you again you're so attached to your comfort that that has to be squashed by your desire to be successful. It has to well overexceed your level desire to be successful, has to over exceed your level for comfort. And for most of us, that's not the case. Comfort is our plan, not discomfort. Why would anybody choose discomfort? That's a question. Why would somebody choose discomfort? Because the goal that they've attached to being discomfortable will create absolute pleasure for them in their life. There's something they want so bad that they're willing to kill the old habit and the comfort to go through some discomfort to be wealthy, comfortable in the future. That's when the whole thing changes. Your family is attached to your discipline. This is my responsibility. We don't put that in anybody else when my wife and I have to work. Well, why? Get out of your get out of your box. Don't you owe that to your family? Whether you're a man or a woman, whether you're the husband or the wife, it doesn't really make any difference. If you're in a two-household, what do something about it? You don't have to be this way. Your business, your life doesn't have to be this way. This is how we grow as a person. We're not about we're this conversation. That's by the way, this podcast is called Success is Not Convenient because this is not going to ever be easy. Any of these podcasts are never going to be joyful to hear, by the way. After doing this now for a year, I can tell you, I think this is my, I don't know, 50 something episode. And I would just say this to you: not one of these episodes is ever going to make you feel good, but it will get you to think. So your decisions are not just affecting you, they're affecting your family. Your future family. Think about for a minute, your future family. Think about your kids. Think about your grandchildren. Think about your sisters and your and your aunts and your uncles and your family members. Your your future family experiences are hidden inside of your current work ethic. I know that's that hurts. That hurts to even hear me say that to you, but I take it deep inside of myself and that if my family is going to have wealth, it's going to be up to me. I don't, I don't hold that responsibility for everybody else. Bernie, you're too direct. Good. Maybe somebody needs to be direct. Maybe somebody needs to put that. Well, you're too consumed with this. Yes, I'm consumed with making sure that my family lives the life of the life I dreamed of. My wife is living the life that I'm working hard for so we can both share our dreams together. That's what I'm working for. It's not anybody else's responsibility but my own. Your children may never know how many times you wanted to quit. They may never know that. I can tell you, my kids will never understand the traveled road of what it takes to get to where we've gotten today, how stressed we were at times, and how many sacrifices that I made, how many fears that you thought that you fought through constantly. Nobody will ever understand that. My wife probably sees a lot of that, but I don't even know if the reality is the emotional side that affects you. But they will live inside the results of the discipline. Your grandchildren may someday benefit from all of the things that you become. See, what's so much fun, and I and I and I just I so appreciate what I'm about to say. My grandchildren will benefit from all of this. My children will benefit even at a higher level than they already have from all of this in the future. The business that you built, the assets that you bought, the courage that we all had to have to build great businesses, the standards that we had to create, the examples that you became, the person you are. People think grid only affects the present. No, grit changes generations. So as we think about our selfishness at times about going, well, I like my free time and I like this and I like that. I like my kids to be wealthy too. What a better gift and be able to give your kids so much wealth that they don't have to work. One disciplined person can completely alter the entire family bloodline. And see, this is personal to me because I didn't grow up. I grew up in, you know, my mom raised us on food stamps. I lived in FHA, um, HUD housing developments. Stop waiting to feel ready. Most people delay action waiting for their confidence. Confidence comes after action. People are like, well, I need to be confident and feel good about it. No, take action, see results, and you're gonna get a lot of confidence. That's how identity is changed. Every hard thing that you push through sends a message to yourself that I can handle more than I thought. And that's how identity changes. That's how you change as a person. And here's the dangerous lie that we tell ourselves. One of the biggest lies people tell themselves is I'll start later. Later becomes another year, another decade, another missed opportunity. How many times do we not pay attention and we're just so focused on our comfort that we don't even pay attention to the opportunity? See, when you're living in comfort, opportunity passes you right by because you're not paying attention to it. Guys, opportunity shows up in discomfort, but you won't spend enough time in discomfort. So you miss all the opportunities. And you end up with another regret in your life, right? The scary part about life is eventually your excuses age with you. Oh, that's painful. I just even don't even like saying what I just said. The scary part about our lives is that eventually all the excuses that you made year in and year out, they age with you. And then there comes a point where people realize the life that they wanted required a version of themselves that they never actually became. Let that soak in for a minute. 60, 70, 80, 90. I wished I had. I wished I wasn't so lazy. I wished I didn't party so hard. I wished I didn't drink as much. I wished I focused more on my business. I'm broke, my kids are broke, I leave nothing to nobody, and who I became and the legacy that I have becomes nothing because you didn't stand up and make a difference. And that realization at all, my friends, is super painful because regret weighs way more than discipline ever will. The regret of the pain of not doing the things that you dreamed about. What a life to dream about something so big that you get excited, but never had the discipline because you live too much in comfort, and your discipline will never ever weigh enough to outpower comfort because you never stayed with it long enough. You owe your dreams a level of effort. Stop apologizing for wanting more. There's nothing wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with wanting a bigger life, better financial success in your life. There's nothing wrong with that. People want to make you think that. They might make you feel greedy. Oh, you care about this. I'm gonna tell you something. Yeah, I've worked a lot of hours, but who cares? The life is beautiful on the other side. The freedom. Oh my God, the growth as a human being, the impact that you can not only make in your family, but your friends, the charity events that you can make a big impact in. Being the kind of leader that changes helps people realize different things in life, the amount of abundance you can acquire. The problem is not dreaming big. The problem is dreaming big while living a small life. You owe your dreams a better effort. You owe your family a level of consistency and you owe your future a massive discipline. Imagine your future self standing in front of you right now. Let's imagine that for a minute. The person who is 20 years down the line who did everything maybe that you were supposed to do, right? You imagine your future self just standing there in front of you right now. Maybe you did the work and maybe you didn't. What would what would they say to you? What would the future safe say say to you? Would they thank you? Or would they ask, why did you stop chasing after your dream? Why did you settle for less? Why did you stay comfortable? And why did you waste so much time doubting yourself? Why did you keep shrinking when you were built for absolutely more growth? Your future is watching your habits right now. They're watching your routines. If you don't think your future is connected to who you are right now, you are mistaken. Guys, this is sad. Watching your excuses and watching your standards, the end of the road, you're like, I wish I would have, and you fill in the blank. Because there's going to be a time in your life, I would guess that maybe you look at yourself at some point and go, I wished I had done something, and yet it's too late. I'm not even sure it's really too late because I know somebody who had nothing at 67 and became a multi, multi, multi, multimillionaire within 10 years. So it's never too late. If you're somebody that's in your 50s or 60s or even 70s, don't quit. See, every single day you are either getting closer to them, those dreams, those goals. Every day you're moving closer through discipline and allowing discomfort not to run your life, or you're getting further away from it. Your future is not created someday, it's being created today. And it doesn't look all grand today because you have to go through discomfort. You have to go through change. When you're going through discomfort in an area of doubt, a little bit of financial stress, what you're doing is you're building for who you will be later. So it's being created today, right now, in this particular moment, in the calls that you make, in the conversations that you avoid, in the discipline that you continue to keep, when nobody else is paying attention, it's the sacrifices that you choose, the standards that you tolerate, and the excuses that you continue to be start believing in. Because what happens, I look at all things all the time and go, why do I continue to keep behaving that way? I have to correct this right now. This is a daily, probably an hourly conversation I have with myself. Why do I keep doing this? This doesn't push my dreams and goals forward. Are you challenging yourself in that way? Take a hard look at yourself and just say, why do I keep acting this way? Every action is casting a vote for your future identity. I'm gonna say this a different way. Every time you take action is casting a vote for you, for your future identity. Every action, every difficult call, every tough decision, it's casting a vote for you. We're putting a drop in a bucket going, man, we're voting for that one. John, Sam, Sally, Fred, boy, we think we're gonna do this, man. They just pushed right through this thing. You don't accidentally build a powerful life. You build it by intentionally, repeatedly, through painful daily action. Painful daily action. Painful, tough. Oh my God, would I do it all over again, though, my friends? No matter how hard it all was to get there, I'd do it all over again because the life on the other side is so beautiful from the life I came from. And there will be moments when you feel totally exhausted. Moments where nobody claps for you. Matter of fact, they're throwing stuff at you. Do you know how many things have been thrown at me and people talking about you? You know, I talk to some mentors all the time. They go, man, Bernie, believe me, I can tell you this has got to be a tough climb. But you know what? The top's very lonely, and people want to pull you down. They like it. You know, there's like the pyramid thing, right? Where they talk about all the people at the bottom and then the top's really narrow and there's a few people at the top. They're not even saying at the top. I'm climbing, though. I'm climbing. And they're grabbing my ankles and they're trying to pull me down. All the naysayers. See, there's moments where the results feel like they're totally invisible. You're fighting and climbing and struggling. And what you know what happens? What's I found about me? Man, bring me down, try it all you want. I'm gonna kick you in the frigging teeth. I'm gonna knock you out. And if I come down that mountain and you make me come down that mountain, I'm climbing right back up. You have to keep going regardless of what happens, because seeds grow underground before anybody ever sees them sprout. Your future family deserves your grit. Your dreams deserve your endurance, and your life deserves your fight. Don't ever give up. One day the future version of you will look back at the season and say, Thank God I didn't quit. And that person looking back, go, good job. You had an opportunity to quit and you didn't. And look at your life today because life you wanted was waiting on the other side of all the behaviors that you were willing to fight through. See, this story isn't about it being in your favor. You don't need it's in your favor. Are you in your favor? Not, oh, they had a little bit of luck. Luck's part of the game sometimes, but it's 1% luck. Everything you want is on these other side of these bad behaviors you have to fight through. And this is the fun part about what it is that we're doing here today, is we're shaping ourselves in a manner that allows us to realize that we're fully responsible. And I think we've identified this for ourselves before we go. Is it going to be hard? Yes. Are people not gonna like you for some reason? Yes. Is there gonna be times when you want to go home? For sure. Is there gonna be times where you want to quit? Yes. Is there gonna be times where people are trying to convince you that this is not worth it? A hundred percent. But what does that have to do with anything? Your strength in your future has got to outweigh your comfort most of the time. It's not that you're not gonna fall back because you are, but keep focusing on that dream. Keep focusing on the things that make you empowerful because what I've learned in all of this, guys, is that my family will forever have a better life because of the grit and determination of this person right here who said, I will not die. I will fight all the way to the end for my life and for the future of my family. Hope you guys have a great day.