Badass Thriving: Beyond Mind, Body & Plate

Episode 9- How to Stop Being a Beginner All the Time

• Caressa Dunphy

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Episode 9: How to Stop Being a Beginner All the Time

You’re allowed to learn. You’re not meant to live in restart mode forever.

Hello, my little badasses — this episode is your wake-up call (with love).
 You’re not failing. You’re not broken.
 You’re just stuck in beginner mode… and it’s time to finally move forward.

This isn’t about shaming beginners — being a beginner is brave.
 But staying stuck in the start–stop cycle for months (or years) isn’t growth — it’s perfectionism and fear in disguise.
 Today, I’ll help you break the pattern, step into progress, and finally finish what you start.

You don’t need a new plan.
 You need to stop ghosting yourself.
 You need structure, support, and a system that works when life gets lifey.
 You need someone in your corner who gets it — and who can walk you all the way through it.

Let’s make this the last time you ever start over again.

In This Episode

  • Why you're not actually "starting over" — you're just stuck in restart mode
  • The difference between being a beginner and staying stuck in beginner identity
  • Why perfectionism hides behind “I’m still figuring it out”
  • What follow-through really looks like in real life (spoiler: it’s not sexy)
  • Why coaching is the container that helps you finally finish what you start
  • What to do when motivation fades and life goes sideways
  • How to stop waiting for “the right time” — and use this season to actually rise

Top 7 Takeaways

  1. You are not broken — you’re just stuck in restart mode
  2. There’s a difference between being new and staying stuck
  3. Starting over is a pattern — not a solution
  4. You’ve done the work. You’re ready to rise
  5. This season is your space to recommit
  6. Follow-through isn’t perfection — it’s consistency with support
  7. Coaching gives you the tools to finally finish what you start

Journal Prompts

  1. Where have I been hiding in beginner mode to avoid messy progress?
  2. What is one thing I’ve started that I know it’s time to finish?
  3. What would change if I stayed in it — even when it felt boring or hard?

Mantra of the Week

“I don’t need to start over. I just need to keep going.”
Say it. Write it. Move like you mean it.

Ready to Stop Starting Over?

One-on-one coaching with me is now open for September.

This is your time to:

  • Step out of the start–stop cycle
  • Build real structure
  • Stay consistent — even when life gets lifey
  • Become the woman who finishes what she starts

To apply:

Connect with Me

Leave a Review

If this episode landed:

  • Leave a review
  • Share it with a friend
  • Send it to the version of you who needed this three months ago

That’s how this message spreads.
 That’s how we rise — together.

Stay fierce, stay nourished, and I’ll see you next week.



Hello, my little bad asses. Welcome back to the Badass Thriving Podcast where we go beyond mind, body, and plate, and we talk about what it really means to rebuild the life, body and mindset that you say you want, to. Actually follow through with what it is that you truly want and say that you're going to do. I'm your host. I am Caressa Dunphy. I'm a registered dietician. I'm a military veteran. I'm a mom to two crazy boys, and I am your badass, no nonsense approach coach to all things about consistency, structure, and showing the hell up for yourself. So in today's episode, it is a wake up call, but a very loving, nurturing one that I do truly mean from the depths of my heart to be kind in a way that brings you forward into an era where you can truly embrace. Being the badass that you are deep within. So today's episode is called How to Stop Being a Beginner All the Time. So this isn't about shaming being a beginner. In fact, being a beginner is very brave. It is very courageous to say, I don't know what it is. I don't know, but I am going to try to figure this out. So that is not what I am talking about here. I am talking about the part where we have to be willing to say, I've been in beginner mode for a while, and I just keep restarting. I keep prepping and starting and stopping and starting and stopping, and I'm sort of in this waiting period for it to be perfect and it is a. Different kind of beginner mode in which we oftentimes find ourselves staying stuck in. So I do wanna differentiate between the two. So again, having the courageous audacity to say, I'm going to try something new and I'm gonna allow myself to be a beginner, is very different than the part of that I am calling out of. I'm just gonna stay stuck in this beginner loop of always stuck here, never actually progressing, and that is what I want to speak to. So that is not necessarily. A good thing to be stuck in this beginner mode all the time in this particular way. So it's not growth. When we are stuck in this loop, it is actually fear in disguise. It is this perfectionism that oftentimes holds us back to say, I cannot do it perfectly, so I'm just gonna keep giving up and starting over and giving up and starting over without getting into the messy middle with. Out pushing past that part. And so if you've been learning a lot throughout these different episodes and trying to apply a lot of the different key elements that we have been talking about, then this is the next thing on this journey that I want to talk about. So it's never actually moving forward when we just stay in this stuck loop in this cycle. So this one's for you if this is something that resonates with you, and again, I just wanna remind you that you are not failing. You are just kind of stuck in this programming. And so I'm here to get you off of the ham. And get you back on track. So let's start here. You are not lazy, you are not broken. You're just stuck in this really awful stop start, reset cycle. And there is a way off of it. There's a way out of it and there's a way through it. So you start strong, but then something happens, life schedule, stress, whatever it may be. You often fall off of that. Then the guilt hits, and then instead of recalibrating, you just reset the whole damn thing. So instead of just checking the whole thing And restarting. Let's learn how to just do these little course corrections. So I'm gonna use a little analogy that I once heard and I thought it was really helpful. So, you know, when you're on a commercial airline and you know, the pilot has that plane on autopilot, they're not actually piloting the plane. There's autopilot. That self-corrects a little bit at a time when the plane itself starts to go and drift a little bit off course. So the autopilot is there to make sure that the drift doesn't happen so far that you end up in a completely different continent, country, state, what have you. Right? And so that is exactly what we can do here, is when the plan starts to go a little off track, instead of just letting it go completely off into who knows where. Just do those little course corrects, do those little bits to pull yourself back into what you had originally been planning and working on, instead of just checking the whole thing out the window. Just learn how to get back on track, learn how to do your own sort of. Autopilot corrections so that you can just say, whoops, life got a little away from me for a couple of weeks and I can get right back on track. This is exactly what happened to me in the last couple of weeks. I had a lot of stuff going on. My grandma passed away and you know, of course there is a moment where everything just needs to pause and we need to, just deal with life at that moment. And instead of just, completely throwing in the towel and being like, I'm done here forever with whatever fitness. Goals I gave myself the grace to just say, I will come back to this when I can, when I am up to it again. And that's exactly what I did this week. So again, I hope that applies and is helpful to you. So it's not about just this drastic overhaul, this brand new plan, a new journal, a new Monday, a new whole big overhaul. It is reminding yourself, you're not failing. Just been constantly restarting. And so that is the problem of every time you restart, you reset your progress. You teach yourself that you can't finish, that you can't follow through on a program. And so then you have this break in yourself trust, and we've talked about that. And so that is the issue of you have to learn to completely show up for yourself even when it's not a good time.'cause that is how you build the self trust. So it's not necessarily a discipline issue, it's a pattern, and that is what we need to break. We need to break the old programming that has been sabotaging and hijacking your progress. So the beginner identity trap is where things get tricky. There is a difference between being a beginner and being willing to learn. Willing to show up, make mistakes, and to take this brand new thing that you're learning and move through those kinds of discomforts that we often face as a beginner. But being stuck in beginner mode is where it truly is this unhealthy relationship, and that beginner mode of being stuck means that, you know, that old programming is allowing yourself to just kind of sit here and run on repeat. So being an actual beginner where you're allowing yourself to take messy action. You're falling down, but you're choosing to get back up. So being stuck in that beginner mode looks like always starting over, refusing to be in that messy metal. Ghosting yourself when it gets uncomfortable, telling yourself you're still figuring it out even after years of just that, like circling the drain. Um, but learning the difference between I am learning, but I'm never actually living the lessons. And so there is a. Application component that is often missed there of you can sit there and make the most beautiful Pinterest boards that are so inspirational, but they're not gonna actually do you any good unless you actually apply them. So the action part is missing. And so the one thing in growth is that the form of perfectionism. Can also wear a beginner name tag and keep you stuck in that. And so it is time to realize which one is truly serving you. Which one is, I am gonna be a beginner, I'm gonna allow myself to show up and be messy and take the action. Or is it the, hi, I'm a beginner here and I've been stuck in this cycle for like 12 years it feels like. So figure out which one this one is for you. And if it is the first one, then congratulations. Good job, well done. You're doing the damn work and you're trying your best, and you're probably feeling spectacularly, but you're probably learning some incredible lessons. But if you're the second one, stay tuned. We're gonna keep working through it. So you've done the work, you've done a lot of internal work. If you've been following along on the episodes, we've been talking a lot about that. Internal component that needs to be addressed for making lifelong sustainable changes, especially when we're talking about fitness, especially when we're talking about nutrition, especially when we're talking about making these implement and implementing these changes so that we can build a better foundation to move forward on. If you've done that, if you've been sitting here and doing the hard work to rebuild trust with your body, if you've been naming the things that you are resistant against, if you've been eating with a purpose, to know that it fuels your workouts. If you've been working at trying to figure out the systems that you can put into place, the structures that you can implement so that you can move forward with intention, if you've been figuring out how to be. Disciplined to figure out the difference between motivation and momentum that you've been letting go of this all or nothing thinking if you have been showing up when motivation was nowhere to be found. That is not beginner energy, that is building a foundation, and I want to just give you the biggest job well done. I wanna give you a hug. I wanna give you a high five. I wanna be like, yes, this is what we're talking about. So you don't need a new plan here. You don't need more prep. You are graduating from starting and you are stepping into finishing. And that is exactly, exactly the kind of work to be done here. And if you are new at the. This. If you are trying to figure it out, then yes, exactly. It is going to be messy. It is not gonna be perfect, and I don't want you to think it is going to be, or that it should be progress over perfection. So this season is made for follow through, but if you have been waiting for the right time, if you are not that person that I was just giving the example about, if you have been waiting for the right time, if you've been sitting on the fence, if you've been trying to figure out kind of like when can you schedule it onto your calendar and your day planner on, when is the right time for you to do this particular component or trying to. Figure out when to start implementing doing some of this work. I'm gonna tell you what time it is. It's right fucking now. It is right fucking now o'clock. So go ahead and figure out what time it is on the calendar. It's right now. Okay, so this is the end of. August. There are kids that are going back to school now, so you can hopefully come back from whatever summer mayhem and adventures that you may have enjoyed with your family, and you can get back to structure. The house is going to be quieter and hopefully cleaner for you, so you don't have to be picking up, uh, messes every five seconds. You don't have to be yelling at the kids to do their chores or to, be the referee between the siblings fighting. This is your time to own it. Again, your mornings are gonna be your own again. Once you get them off to the bus stop, this is finally the space that you can focus on you. So I want to invite you to ask yourself a question right now. What are you gonna wait for? Are you waiting for something? Are you waiting for something that is going to be your big old green light in the sky to say, now is the time. Are you waiting until after Halloween? Are you waiting until after Thanksgiving? Are you waiting for the new year to come around? For you to finally get onto those fitness goals that you've been meaning to get around to? Because the time is gonna go by anyway. And if you're just waiting until January 1st, then you're just stuck in the same old programming. You're stuck in that same loop of someday I will do the thing that I know that I need to do for myself to feel better about myself, to feel like I'm taking control of my own health and fitness. Why are we waiting for January 1st? So I want you to think about if you were to start right here, right now, this will be the last time that you ever start again. If you stay committed to messy progress and you refuse to be a beginner again. You are gonna be so much further along in January than you were if you hadn't started that. Time is gonna pass anyway, so why not make it the next three months of dialing it in? So let's be clear. Follow through doesn't mean this perfectionism in the next three months. It just means deciding and backing it up to stop starting over. That you are going to implement the systems that are gonna carry you forward. You are gonna do it right here, right now, and you're gonna take control of your life, your fitness, your health, your nutrition, because there is no better time. Right? Are you gonna wait for some catastrophe to strike? For you to finally go, oh, I really wish I would've taken control of my health. Oh, I just got this horrible health diagnoses. I wish I could have done something about it 10 years ago. Right? Like, what are you waiting for? So staying in it when you start it and to commit to allowing it to be messy, to allowing yourself to make the mistakes, to even allow it to be boring because you get into a routine and sometimes it just feels like it's the most boring thing on earth, but you know that you are doing everything every day, these little tiny micro commitments to push the needle towards your progress. And that is how you show up. That is how you do it. You make your routine as boring as hell and easy as hell to follow so that you can follow through on it every single day. Fitness isn't something that you pay for once and you get it rent free for the rest of your life. No, it is rented. You have to rent your fitness and your nutrition and the rent is due. Every single day, you have to put in the work. You have to be consistent. You have to be consistent with your nutrition. You have to stay consistent with becoming the woman that you keep saying that you want to be every single day. You need to ask yourself. Does this align with the person that I am trying to become, the person that I'm trying to build, the person that I know in my heart I am returning home to. So this is the best time to sign up and become a client because I can be your coach. This is the best time because having a coach in your corner to say. Hey. I see you. I hear you. But here I've got you. I know that you are working on doing some amazing internal work and some healing. You are doing some amazing mindset work. You are building the foundation, but you need a container that keeps you in it. When life gets busy, when life gets heavy, when life gets lifey, you know, so coaching gives you. So much structure and support because there's so many times that those well-meaning persons that are close to us maybe do a little sabotage stuff on us, and we have to remember that it's not about them. That if our well-meaning people in our life are making little, you know, low grade comments about your own fitness and health journey and the things that you are trying to implement, that is not your work. That is them saying stuff about their own life and you are just in somehow some way mirroring it back to them to make them feel all uncomfortable inside. So that is not your business. That is not your business to be like, hey. So and so, um, yeah, maybe you're right. Maybe I should give up on everything I've ever dreamed. No, no, no, no. Fuck that. Okay. You can be like, thank you so much for your concern. I hear you, but I'm gonna keep doing what I have set out to do because it is for me and for me alone. And then you have to just grind it out. You have to put on your blinders and you have to just say, with all the love in the world, please let me be me. Let me do what I gotta do. And you know what? I imagine that at some point they'll come around or they'll fade out, and either way it's okay. Because we are not here to live anybody else's life. We are here to live our own big life, and you can't rescue every single little stray kitten. Like you just can't. You can only be here in this moment trying your hardest to live authentically to who you are and to be kind to those around you and to, hopefully inspire those in your own circle. I am on this journey myself to. Live a big, authentic, beautiful, joy-filled life. I am not here to be nice. Being nice is interconnected with being kind, and I am not here for that. I am here to be kind, but I am also gonna sit here and live my truth, be authentically me, and to hold my boundaries, right? And I can only hope. That is helpful to you because it is helpful to me to say, I am here. I am also trying to help others. I'm going to be kind and I am gonna live my most authentic life. And that can only be done by stepping into the person that you know, that you are supposed to be deep down inside, coming home to yourself and checking in with yourself and saying, what is it I want from this life? You know? And if you are on this plane and you are trying to work towards these amazing, big, beautiful health and nutrition goals. You need someone who understands that you need someone who's also walked this path, who's also a. I had some very well-meaning people in their life, but I had to be like, thank you, I hear you, but also I'm going to continue doing my own thing. You can come along for the ride, or there's the door if you need it to leave Stage Wright, or whatever, right? Like I understand the journey. I have been here, I have walked it for a while, and I, for a long time could not understand why I had to go through some of the most heartbreaking things I've ever gone through alone. Now I know it's because I was put on this earth to help other people to offer a hand when other folks are struggling and say, I know this. I know this journey. I have been there. Literally have been right in your shoes and I understand and I am here to help you. So I am the best coach that you could probably find. In this realm here, because I've done quite a bit of that work myself. And to have someone be able to give that to you with a lot of heart and a lot of badass grit, but a lot of love of, you know, here we are on this plane together doing the damn thing, and I am honored to be here as a part of your journey. So when we coach together. You build a strategy with me, you are the driver in the driver's seat, and I am the co-pilot and I'm the one that has the map that can say, here's how to get from point A to point B, but this is your life. And so we figure out how to make it work for you. You have to be able to put systems and plans in place. That feel good to you, that work for you? Not everything's gonna work. The way that I say, Hey, here's what you should do. Like I'm not gonna shit on you. We're gonna figure out what works together. So we're gonna figure out a system that works when your motivation disappears, we're gonna figure out how to support you so that you can stop ghosting yourself so you can. Stop starting and stopping all the time. And I'm here to keep you accountable. I am here so that I can hold you to your goal, but it's not a rigid goal. It is one that we put flexibility. We plan for the flexibility. We plan that life is gonna life. We plan when shit is gonna go sideways as best as we can. And when we can't plan for stuff, we figure out how to adapt your plan. We don't just throw it all out the window. So you do not need another reset. You just need a system that you can stay on and you can stay in and you can stay moving forward. So my one-on-one coaching spots are now available for September. They're open now. So if you are excited to sign on with me, shoot me an email over at Badass Thriving podcast@gmail.com and we'll get you signed up for coaching spots. They start September 1st and they are open right now, so they're open live. You can check out my website at. A is for avocados.com for more information. And as always, reach out to me on social media. I would love to hear from you. So here are this episode's. Top takeaways. Number one, you are not broken. You're just stuck in restart mode. Number two, there is a difference between being new and staying stuck. Number three, starting over is a pattern, not a solution. Number four, you've done the work, you're ready to rise. Number five, this season is your space to recommit. Number six, follow through isn't perfection. It's consistency with support. Number seven, coaching gives you the tools to finally finish. What you've started. Here is the journal prompts. Where have I been hiding in beginner mode to avoid messy progress? What is one thing I've started that I know it is time to finish. What it would change if I stayed in it, even when it felt boring or hard. Here is your mantra of the week. I don't need to start over. I just need to keep going. Say it, write it, move like you mean it. You've done the prep, you've done the reflection. Now it's time to move forward. No more circling. No more waiting. No more beginner loops. Let's turn this into your turning point. If this episode hit home, please leave a review, comment or share it with a friend. Send it to the version of you who needed this three months ago. This is how this message spreads. This is how we rise together. Stay fierce nourished, and I'll see you next week. You little bad asses. Follow along at the Badass Thriving Podcast on social media, or email me at Badass Thriving podcast@gmail.com. If you want more information about one-on-one coaching or the Badass Rising membership, which launches September 1st.