This Season Doesn't Define Me

Welcome to Episode 27! Just recapping on last week's episode and wanted to let ya all know that I was not providing commentey about any relationship that I'm in (they are all amazing) when taking about using our precious time carefully. Just wanted to clear that up!! I love you all xox 

The song of the week is Landslide by Fleetwood Mac. Although this is a love song, it reminds me that even mental health journeys have chapters and that those chapters don't need to define us permanently. Thinking about life's seasonality reminds me about life's changing seasons and can help us navigate difficult periods and times with hope and perspective. 

Currently, the season that I'm in is a medication-free season after many years of being medicated. However, I fully aware that i may need another hospital stay at some point again and that i might not always be medication-free.

I've also started playing pickleball, and I've also been given the all-clear to play basketball. I'm so pumped to play.

I also talk about the Aussie Greys Assistance Dogs program, which repurpose racing greyhounds as PTSD support animals. So good!

The thought of the week is "By facing our challenges and overcoming them, we grow stronger, wiser and more compassionate"

Find me on Facebook and Instagram, and don't forget to like and follow. Have a great week, and don't forget to be kind to yourself.

Song Of the Week:

Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

https://youtu.be/WM7-PYtXtJM?si=t4UG40UnqNABTg-X

Transcript

Welcome to Mad Mel's Mic

Speaker 1 0:00

Hey there, welcome to Mad Mel's Mic. Thanks for joining me. My name is Melissa and this is a podcast all about me, about my life, about my life with PTSD, about my life with a husband and kids and friends and everything in between. Thanks for tuning in, hello everybody, and welcome to episode 27. Thanks for tuning in, as so many of you do every week. This week has been a very good week, so let's get this started and we can have a chat about it. Thanks again for tuning in and having a listen Just quickly before we get this episode started, I just wanted to mention, in regards to my episode last week about how we're using our energy and who we're giving our energy to and things like that, I just wanted to let everybody know that it wasn't a direct reflection on any of my relationships or any of my friendships that I have, and I wasn't certainly upset with anybody or anything like that.

Landslide: Seasons of Life

Speaker 1 1:05

I was just sort of it piqued my interest when Taylor had said that and I thought what a great analogy about where we invest our energy and how people can use us and whether or not we're taking comfort in people just saying, oh, can you do this for me? Making comfort in people just saying, oh, can you do this for me? But I think it's important to realize that relationships aren't about what we can do for one another. It's about being there for one another and it's not a transaction Well, it is, in a sense, of a better word, but it's not. Well, if I do this for you, you need to do this for me. It's an ebbs and flows, so I just wanted to let everybody know that my relationships and friendships that I have are amazing, and I understand when people silent on text messages or whatever social media and things like that, and that life does get busy and I'm certainly the first person to understand that sometimes it's just all too much. And I think it's important to realize and remember that having those friendships that are easy, in those relationships where we don't need to work hard at it, they're the ones that we want around, the ones that, when we're at our lowest, are still there having our back. So just yeah, I just wanted to make mention of that sort of before we get started, because I think it is important that we invest our time and our energy on those who deserve it.

Speaker 1 2:40

So let's get into the song of the week, which is Landslide by Fleetwood Mac. Well, I've been afraid of changing. So first of all I just want to say, yes, I understand that this is a love song, but I think there's some important things, particularly in that little snippet that I played, that resonates with me. And it's so weird where these songs come from. Like I haven't heard this song for years and years and years.

Speaker 1 3:36

And I was watching the final episode, or the second final episode of the Handmaid's Tale last night and they played this song and it hit me when it says that can I sail through the changing ocean tides and can I handle the seasons of my life? And I just went. That is so true because I remember a few years ago I was catching up with a good mate and I was bitching about being overweight and how much weight I had put on since all my medication changes and things like that, and it's depressing. So you go on these antidepressants to help with your depression and then you gain weight which just exacerbates your depression. So it's a vicious cycle. Anyway, that's not the point of what I'm getting at here. So my wonderful friend said to me she goes Liz, and that's one of the names I get called. It is just a season of your life at the moment. It will change and I didn't think too much of it then, and then I sort of heard that in that song.

Speaker 1 4:45

Last night while I was watching the Handmaid's Tale, I went you know what? That's exactly right. This is just a season of my life and I'm not the person I was when I joined the cops. I'm certainly not the person I was when I joined the cops. I'm certainly not the person I was when my head first broke. And regardless of where you are at the moment, particularly if you're in a really, really low state, just remember that this is just a season. This season does not define you and I think it's so refreshing to know that you know what. There is light at the end of the tunnel and I can see how evident that has been in the last four years and particularly probably in the last six months for me personally. Like you've all been aware of the continual medication changes, and now I'm currently off all medication and it's been so refreshing to be able to feel again and just seeing that change in me and my mental state in the last six months has been so refreshing and I can sort of look back at things in hindsight and go ah, you know what? That was just a season. It was just a season that I had to go shop at the Biggie's Beautiful section, and that's okay, because I'm still loved and I'm still the person who I am. And it's okay for me to spend multiple stays in the psych ward because it's just a season. Multiple stays in the psych ward because it's just a season and there's no shame to go.

Speaker 1 6:21

You know, I think I might need to go back because that's just where you are in that point in life. So, as hard as it is to not get caught up in our own mental state and look, I am the first person to admit that it is far easier to say than do. But I think it's important to realize that tomorrow things might look a little bit different, and next week they might look different again, and the week after that you might be back as to where we are today. But that's okay and it's about riding that roller coaster and it's about riding that roller coaster and it's about realizing that this is just a section of my life. This is just a season. This is just a chapter in my book. This doesn't define me and I know my husband gets worried sometimes that I'm getting caught up in the whole PTSD world and not letting things go with doing my podcast and particularly getting into the motivational speaking. I think he's concerned that I'm just going to get caught in that loop of PTSD. But for me, I can find it and I haven't done anything yet. But I find it very promising and exciting that this new chapter of my life, this new season, is looking something different and it's getting me excited about doing things again. So that's really been refreshing.

My Week: MRIs and Pickleball

Speaker 1 7:48

So let's get into the week that I have had. It's been a good week. I I feel like I have been ridiculously busy, but also, in the same breath, I feel like I've done absolutely nothing, which I know isn't true, because I have been busy and I'm tired. So I had my MRI on my neck and that's just to make sure that there was no spinal cord compression from my bike accident. I need to make an appointment to see my GP and follow up on the bloods and things like that that the neurologist had me do. So I had a few appointments last week and appointments are draining, so I did that.

Speaker 1 8:32

I've been getting back into my pickleball and I'm loving that, so I played pickleball three times this week and it's just nice and social and spending time with my mates and mates that deserve my energy. So that's been lots of fun as well. And then I have been it's finals for basketball season for the kids at the moment. So I've been up there and I was watching Cliff and I were watching the girls play on Monday night, I think it was and during halftime Cliff and I just got up and bounced the ball and got a bit rough and was defending each other and stuff like that, and I thought you know what I really miss playing team sports and I know I love pickleball, but this is just a whole different ball game for me and that pun was not intended and I really love it.

Speaker 1 9:27

So I thought I'll go see my physio and see how my ankle's going, because I haven't seen her since February. So I went and saw her and she's very happy with how my ankle's going. So I've been given the all clear to get back into basketball, which is awesome. So I've been given the all clear to get back into basketball, which is awesome. So she's going to be ordering me a different type of ankle guard, one that's got the medals on either side, just to give that added protection. She told me how to take my ankle, which was a blessing and a curse, because I always end up with a reaction to the sticky shit always end up with a reaction to the sticky shit. So I now have a very itchy and angry ankle just on my skin, but not internally. So I think the hardest part about seeing a physio is actually doing the exercises, and I know that the only person that's going to benefit is me if I do these exercises. But it's just such a fucking drag. It's like, oh, come on, let's go do some bloody calf raises and stuff like that. But I know that it's going to benefit me in the long run to continue doing these exercises. So I will stop being a stubborn mule and do that for me. So it'll be nice to get back into basketball next season, which will be the start of term four, which I actually have no idea these days when school finishes or when school starts or anything like that. So I guess the kids will tell me one day when I wake them up in the morning and say, oh, you know what, mum, it's school holidays, we don't need to get up, so and then we'll all go back to bed. But yeah, it's been a good week and I've got to spend lots of time with some mates.

Greyhounds as PTSD Assistance Dogs

Speaker 1 11:01

I ended up driving to Bathurst yesterday and caught up with one of my mates, from who I met in hospital, who was actually just picking up a rescue greyhound. And these greyhounds are ex-racing dogs and it's nice to see that they're getting repurposed for something positive. So the company is called Aussie Greys Assistance Dogs and they offer retired racing greyhounds for those with PTSD and they're there for assistance and training and I think the program is so good. Greyhounds, funny animals, and I think you either love them or you hate them and I just find they're beautiful dogs, don't get me wrong, but I just they're so awkward and lanky and it's like when they sit down it's like, oh shit, you look so uncomfortable. But I think the program is so beneficial. So if you want any further information about these Aussie greys and their assistance dogs, let me know and I can give you some information.

Speaker 1 12:11

But it's nice to see that these dogs are being repurposed to help those with PTSD and other things as well. So, and the program is run by an ex-cop and he was there actually yesterday and I just started yarning as I do, because I'm pretty good at talking and he was saying that how he used to be in the cops and stuff like that and was working with the GP dogs, which is general purpose dogs. So now he's running this program and for those who need an assistance dog, the dogs come fully trained so they run through an eight-week program Once they have been selected that they are suitable for the program. They they get trained for eight weeks and then they check your suitability and the suitability of the dog to you as well. So and they offer ongoing support once you have the dog. So it's not like you get the dog and then they wipe your hands off you, but they continue with training and make sure things are settling in well and stuff like that. So I think it's a great, great little program that they have running in, which is which is started by an ex-New South Wales police officer, which is amazing. So, like I said, if you want any further information about the program, just send me a message or something like that and then I can give you what information I have in relation to that. Anyway, that was a little segue.

Speaker 1 13:39

So I went to Bathurst to catch up with my maid and she was feeling a little bit anxious about getting this dog, and it's a huge thing. She's picking up a greyhound who she also has three cats and as racing greyhounds they like to chase things. So this dog has been labeled the unicorn because apparently he's not particularly interested in cats, which is, which is nice. So and I got down there and I got to spend the day in the sun just enjoying spring, and it was, it was beautiful, beautiful weather this weekend. Spring has certainly sprung and it's so refreshing. It's still cool, but it's nice to see the sun again. And it was really nice to catch up with my mate down there. And then I came back and then we went and played pickleball and that was lots of fun.

Future Plans and Thought of Week

Speaker 1 14:38

Oh, also, by the way, I am an NRL follower, which is for those of my listeners. Internationally it is a National Rugby League football competition and I've supported Penrith. And I know people. I can hear people saying, oh, you're only supporting Penrith because you've won the last four seasons. No, I've supported Penrith since the day I met my husband, because I would not be married if I supported anybody other than Penrith, and I remain that fact. They were doing shit for years and years and years and we were still following the good old Panthers. So they won the first finals I don't know what even that's called. So we play again this weekend. So that was fun. I got home from pickleball on Saturday night and Penrith were playing and I walked in and my husband and the kids were all sitting there in the lounge room waiting for me to watch the footy, and it was nice to spend the afternoon and evening all together watching the footy. So finals footy is here. Everybody, let's get it on.

Speaker 1 15:46

I'm also hoping that as this podcast evolves, that I'll be getting a few different people. I know I've interviewed the kids to give us a little bit of insight as to what living with me with my PTSD has been like for them. But I think it's important to get other people's stories of their journeys and things like that, because we learn so much from other people. So my intention is to get a few different people in and mixing up the episodes a little bit as well, and not because I don't enjoy doing this, but I think it's. I'm sort of at the point at the moment where I'm feeling quite good mentally and I'm not having to use my brain power to survive day to day. So I think if we can get some insight on other people, we might be able to learn different things as well. So just keep in mind if you want me to interview you so you can share your story, please let me know, because the more we can get there, the better.

Speaker 1 16:48

And let's, as we always do, finish with the thought of the week, and this week's thought of the week is by facing our challenges and overcoming them, we grow stronger, wiser and more compassionate. So bear that in mind. Mind that every hurdle we face is making us stronger for tomorrow. Look after yourself and have a great week and remember to be kind to yourself, thank you. Thanks for tuning in to Mad Mel's Mic. I'm Melissa Smith and I hope you've enjoyed listening. You can find me on Facebook and Instagram and don't forget to like and follow. Have a great week and don't forget to be kind to yourself.