Bad Days Are Worth Gold

Season 2, Episode 16

I’m riding a wave of optimism while also dealing with knee pain that’s starting to tug at my mental health. I talk through how I keep myself from sliding into isolation by leaning on practical tools, supportive people, and a more hopeful inner voice. 
• song of the week and why bad days can still be “worth gold” 
• knee injury update, physio appointment, and being sent for an MRI 
• the link between physical pain and psychological wellbeing 
• choosing a short-term response without letting it become long-term 
• using exercise that fits the injury, including swimming and physio work 
• prioritising connection to avoid the isolation spiral 
• simple breathing practice on waking and drinking water for hydration 
• sleep disruption from pain and how it affects patience and relationships 
• why mentoring helps turn big goals into small achievable steps 
• finding community through shared interests like quilting and sewing 
You can find me on Facebook and Instagram, and don't forget to like and follow. 

Song of the Week:

Luke Combs: Days Like These

https://youtu.be/uGsmAZCwrG8?si=Y1E-fiz9XHlE4Gwu

Thought of the Week:

The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and The Horse - Charlie Mackesy

"I'm not afraid" said the mole, "if I wasn't caught in this snare I'd kill you" said the fox. "if you stay in that snare you will die" said the mole. So the mole chewed through the wire with his tiny teeth"

Transcript

Welcome To Mad Mel’s Mic

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey there, welcome to Mad Mel's Mike. Thanks for joining me. My name is Melissa and this is the podcast all about me. About my life. About my life with PTSD. About my life with the husband and kids and friends and everything in between. Thanks for tuning in. Hey everybody, and welcome to Mad Mel's Mic Season 2, Episode 16. Let's just jump straight into it and get this episode started. So here we are, thanks again everybody for tuning in. Episode 16 of season 2. It's been a fun week, very, very fun week, and there is a bit of sarcasm in that. But at the minute I'm feeling pretty good and very optimistic about life ahead.

Song Of The Week And Meaning

SPEAKER_00 0:47

But let's get into the song of the week. And I was actually sent this by a mate of mine who I met as an inpatient stay in actually a few impatience days, and we've become good friends, and she messages me often, and she sent me this song literally just the other day. And as you know, I sometimes struggle for the song of the week, and she sent me this, so thank you. She will know who it is when she listens to it. Um it's a song by Luke Combs called Days Like These. So let's have a listen.

SPEAKER_01 1:25

Days like thee. But the can be ball, and it can be still on days like thee. When the sunshine's bright, I feel like it's on gonna be alright.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

What I like particularly about those few little lines that I just played there was that days like these they are worth gold. But they can't be bought and they can't be sold. But what I think it's important to realize is that these could be the bad days just as much as the good days, and I think it's important to remember that even during the bad days, we are learning so much about ourselves and about life and about resilience. And yesterday, bad days are hard and they're tiring, and I wish they never happened to any of us. But unfortunately, on this journey that we call life, we are going to have bad days, we are gonna have good days, and we are gonna have mediocre days. But whether they are the good or the bad or the mediocre, they are still worth gold because during all of that process we are learning, and learning is such a fundamental key to our inner purpose and our inner health, and whether that be our physical health or our psychological health, it is so important to be continually learning, and when you make it through that bad day or that bad hour or that bad minute, you've come through, and I know that a lot of people who are listening are stuck in that bad six months or whatever it is, but there is still light at the end of the tunnel, so yeah, just remember that even in the bad days, days like these are still worth gold. So I really

Knee Injury And Mental Spiral

SPEAKER_00 3:25

like that song. So thank you for sharing it. Um, talking about bad days, I am still having ongoing issues with my knee, and I'm gonna be completely frank, it's making me really sad, and I can feel my mental health spiraling. Um, so it's something that I really need to look after and take care of myself. I was at the physio yesterday, ended up getting a cancellation appointment, and I'm being sent off for an MRI. So who knows what that's going to look like? Um, but I know that this physical injury doesn't define me, and I am so much more than a broken knee, but it is so hard to get out of the mindset that a physical injury doesn't have a psychological effect on me as well. They sort of go hand in hand, and I like I don't think you need to be diagnosed with anything to have that effect as well. Like when you're not feeling good physically, you're not feeling good psychologically and emotionally. So it's about for me in the next couple of days and a week until I get my MRI and um find out what is actually going on with my knee, is to try and focus on the positive things and not let myself spiral out of control because we all know where I have ended as a result of a physical injury. I've ended up as an inpatient in St. John of God, and that was the best thing that happened to me. I'm not going to sugarcoat it and lie and say that it was a terrible thing. Like I had learned so much from my inpatient stays, but I don't want this physical injury or this setback push me back into the hospital. And look, if it does, it does. That's that's fine. But if I can have a look at some of the tools that I have learnt through my multiple inpatient stays about trying to keep my head above water when these things pop up, um, I think that's important as well. So I'm just some of the things that I know that I can work on is exercise. And I know that sounds really, really silly because I have a sore knee. Um, yes, but I am still able to swim. I went for a swim this morning. I didn't want to get up. Cliff and I have been swimming, or we haven't swimmed the last couple of weeks because he hurt his back last week, and the week before that I was away. So um we went this morning, and it's the same every morning, like neither of us want to get up out of bed. And but we went and the my knee actually held up surprisingly well in the pool. So that's one form of exercise that I can still do because that exercise helps your mental state as well. So I can keep doing that. I am going to continue doing my physio exercises because they're important for my strength, and I know that strength is very important as well. But there's other things that I am going to be doing to help myself with this physical injury that I'm carrying at the moment, and I think one of the big ones for me is connection. I think it's important for me to still reach out to my mates and my loved ones and not start to hide back in that hole and that go down the spiral of isolation because we all know that that's just the tip of the iceberg, and then it just is a massive spiral from there. So, and it's hard to want to get out of the house when it's I can still walk, yes, but it hurts, and that being able to get out of the house and catch up with a mate is going to be so important over the next couple of weeks as well, so I don't um really really lose my head in all of this. So, um, two of the things I'm gonna be working on is my exercise, whether that be swimming, my physio exercises, um see how I go with a walk. I look, I don't think I'm gonna cause too much more injuries if I or any more injuries if I continue to play basketball on it and things like that. So I will turn up to basketball next week and see how it feels. Um, but I'm certainly not going to do anything stupid and risk even more significant injury than what I already have. So exercise and connection, they're going to be the two things that I'm going to be working on as

Exercise, Connection, And Staying Afloat

SPEAKER_00 7:59

well. But one of the things that I learned from the change room course that I did two weeks ago was the importance of breathing, and just little thing in the morning is when I wake up in the morning, is take those purposeful, intentional breaths. Um, because we are our heart rate drops and we don't get as much oxygen into our body, and um, that's important for us to take four breaths, four big, deep, a big deep breath for four seconds and exhaling for slightly longer. So try and do that four or five times as I'm laying in bed, waking up and having a large glass of water as well, because as we're sleeping, we become dehydrated. So there's just some things I'm going to be working on in the next couple of weeks. And I think it's important for my listeners to realize that yes, the last sort of six months, maybe more, I've been doing quite well with my mental health, but I think it's so important to be still utilizing these tools that I have learned over the course of my inpatient stays, my outpatient courses, and the last change room course that I have done as well. Because if we get into the habit of doing them when we're well, then they will become second nature when we aren't doing as well. So, yeah, that's that's something that I actually am going to have to be very mindful of and conscious of moving forward because I can see the potential that this knee hurting and causing me pain is going sorry, can have an impact on my head as well. But I'm going to be looking at it from an optimistic mindset opposed to a pessimistic mindset and go, this is not going to affect my head. I am going to be able to get through this temporary speed bump without it having a long-term effect or even a medium-term effect on my mental health. And yes, it's going to have a short-term effect on my mental health because I can't do the things that I want it to do, but that's okay, and then that's normal. Um, I think it becomes a problem then when it becomes a medium-term um impact on my head. So um, yeah, we'll just um move forward and see what happens with the MRI when I get that done. Um, but another thing that my knee has been affecting has been my sleep. And last night was particularly bad. I kept waking up with lots of pain, and um we all know that sleep is so important for us, and if I'm not getting a decent night's sleep, then everything else just seems to spiral. I keep saying spiral this episode. I find that I have a different word each episode that I continually use, and the word of the this episode is spiral. Um but yeah, I um I just I I took some Botaran last night and some panadol, and um it still just kept me up because I just can't get in a comfortable sleep. So that's another thing I need to be mindful of sort of moving forward, is that I have been getting a decent night's sleep, which means my irritability is quite high and my patience is quite low, and that then can have an effect on the kids and my relationships and stuff like that as well. So I just need to be mindful of that.

Sleep Pain And Short Fuse

SPEAKER_00 11:35

So, what else have I been up to this week? Um I don't think I've really done a lot. It's well, it is only Tuesday, so that doesn't help. Uh, we spent the weekend at home. It's cool, it's winter here for my other side of the equator listeners. Um, yeah, I haven't really been getting up to a lot, just been spending time with the kids and with Mel and chatting with other people and things like that. I've been watching a renovation show and I've nearly finished that, so I'm going to be looking for a new um series soon. So if you have any suggestions, let me know. I finished my another quilting project. I um ended up doing a quilted sort of in like a bricklay pattern um blanket, it's sort of like a throw, it's quite large actually, a throw rug for when I'm sitting on the lounge because it's so cold at the moment. We do have the heater on so we're not um freezing, but um yeah, so we've been doing that. Rory finished one of her quilts and she did an amazing job as that. And it's nice actually just spending time together with her and quilting and talking about our projects and things like that, and it's nice to have that sort of shared interest with her. Um yeah, I haven't really been up to a lot. I feel like there was a lot of catch-up from when I was away. There it I was really tired when I got back. I had driven a lot of K's, and that takes its toll, and then you throw in the knee amongst it as well. They sort of um don't really have the energy or the motivation to to do much as

The Change Room Mentor Mindset

SPEAKER_00 13:26

well. So I know I've spoken about a lot, but I just want to go back and have another chat about the change room course. And what I find so good about this course is that each participant of the course is given a mentor, and there's a couple of sessions, one-on-one sessions over Zoom or Teams or a phone call before the face-to-face part and component of the course, and then these one-on-ones also continue after um the face-to-face, and I had um a face-to-face, a one-on-one, sorry, this morning with Matt Elliot, who you know is my mentor, and it's just just so nice to be able to bounce different ideas and thoughts, and whether these thoughts and ideas are so well appear to be so out of my reach, but to have him go, well, no, that's not unachievable, and that is attainable, and just giving different suggestions and things like that, and that has been so helpful this morning with my head and my motivation because, like I said, I was having a bit of a pity party in relation to my knee, and then having that phone call with him, it was just so nice because he gave me a different perspective and gave me things to work on, and so whether it's you're working on little things-well, not little things, but something like you want to be happier, and or you want to work on your breathing, like your mentor will be able to put little achievable steps in place to just instead of eating the apple all at once, we take little bites and we don't get to where we want to be by doing one massive step at one time. It's about taking those little stairs and slowly working up and working up. And I think it's so nice to have somebody in my corner to say, All right, Mel, so if we look at you want to get to XYZ, well, let's where where are you now in terms of working towards XYZ? And for example, I might be at C or you might be at F, and then start working on the next letter and the next step to make your goal a reality. And Matt Elliott is a big advocate for your internal dialogue and reverse engineering, in his words, your your thought process and things like that. And um, I don't know, it's just so rewarding and comforting and humbling and exciting to know that I have somebody so awesome and amazing, and I'm sure he's probably going to listen to this and go, stop fucking blowing smoke up my ass. But it's true, like it's it's so nice to have somebody like him in my corner with the shared interest. We're not necessarily the same goal, but the same interest of wanting the same thing out of me, and I think that is so so nice, and it's refreshing, and it's lit that spark in my belly again to go, you know what? You may be down with your knee, but you're not out, and there's still things that you can do, still little steps that we can do to get your long-term goal in place, and yeah, it was just really nice. So, Matt, if you are listening to this, thank you again. Um, if you haven't listened to his TED Talk, I can't highly recommend it enough. I will this week put another link to his TED Talk on my socials, um, and I must say, there, whilst I'm talking about socials, I'm a bit proud of myself because I have been making a more concerted effort with my socials. Um, my next step is to get more active on TikTok, and that um takes a little bit more work because I have to put together a video. Um, but I know that the once I have um reels and TikToks out, that the downloads increase significantly. So I need to do this for my own good. Um I plan on interviewing a friend who I met in hospital in the next couple of weeks, so keep your eye out for that.

Finding Community Through Shared Interests

SPEAKER_00 17:41

Um this week, maybe forward, we got Origin, what day is today? Tuesday, we got Origin tomorrow night, so go New South Wales. Um, and I actually went to a sewing group last week as well, and I was very nervous isn't the right word, but I I think we all have the fear of the unknown. And I messaged it was at a mate's house, so that also that made it a lot easier. But I messaged her and I said, like, what do you need me to bring? And she only said sewing, and that wasn't particularly helpful. Like, do I bring my sewing machine? Like, I wasn't actually up to the sewing part of my project anyway, so I just brought the fabric and my cutting board and my rotary blade. Um yeah, I sound like I know what I'm doing. Um, so yeah, but it was really nice because that I think it's going to be nice to be able to ask for pointers and tips and like just little things that can help me and make my life or make the project a little bit easier and come up with ideas and stuff like that, and just being somewhere in an environment who people have this shared interest, and that's what I was speaking about last week about find your community, whether that is a sewing group or a running group or a book club or church or a sporting group or a walking group, find your community, and then once you have that shared interest, then you have something to talk about, and and you can go from there. But community is so important moving forward.

Thought Of The Week And Goodbye

SPEAKER_00 19:10

Thank you so much for tuning in. And before I nearly forgot, before we finish, I'm gonna finish with the thought of the week. So I've got my trusty book here, The Boy, the Mole, The Fox and the Horse by Charlie Maxie, and I'm going to open it up to a random page. Well, I think I've done that one. I'm trying to open it to a random page. But I've starting to run out of my first times because I've done getting through this book. All right, so it says, Well, hello. Do you have a favorite saying? asked the boy. Yes, said the mole. What is it? If at first you don't succeed, have some cake. I see, does it work? Every time. I'm pretty certain I've read that one again, so I'm gonna find another one. Because I didn't understand that the first time. Because I don't really like cake, so that doesn't help. Okay. So the actual thought of the week. I'm not afraid, said the mole. If I wasn't caught in this snare, I'd kill you, said the fox. If you stay in that snare, you will die, said the mole. So the mole chewed through the wire with his tiny teeth. I'm not sure what that means. I'm not afraid, said the mole. But the mole's caught in a snare. But he's not afraid. So I guess we can look at life. Yes, we're caught in a bad situation. But what does fear do to us? Have a good week. Thanks for tuning in and be kind to yourself. Thanks for tuning in to Mad Mail's Mike. I'm Melissa Smith, and I hope you've enjoyed listening. You can find me on Facebook and Instagram, and don't forget to like and follow. Have a great week, and don't forget to be kind to yourself.