49: Why You Attracted A Narcissist - Reprogram Your Subconscious Brain (Part 3)

This is the third part of a mini series dedicated to the buzzword at the moment… narcissism.

In this episode I focus on:

• Recap of the series
• Subconscious brain patterns
• How to reprogram your brain
• Rendering your reality 
• Using intuition to change limiting beliefs 
• Soul path vs emotional imbalance 
• Your creator field

If you just want to get to the real truth of how this universe really works, and why you were in a narcissist dynamic, this is the episode for you. 

We might not of had the same childhood, but we would have had similar thought patterns to see this in our reality.

Dive on in! 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi everyone and welcome back to Intuitive Diaries with me, Emily Marie. If you're watching this on video, guys, I just can't even get on the sofa today. I am not in the middle of this space. I'm sure that we will do lots of shuffling throughout the episode. So today we're gonna go back to talking about the root cause of narcissism and why I attracted this into my life to help other people understand why they have encountered this dynamic before, and maybe why they are in this dynamic at this moment in time. I'm also going to talk about why other people sometimes literally cannot see the side to the narcissism, the narcissistic personality or dynamic situation that you can see. We are already getting lots of shuffles around with Majuki. So this is going to be the final episode of my little mini-series, and I'm really hoping that it's going to bring clarity to people and help people like understand okay, this was to do with me because in my healing journey, right at the very start, and I hate the word healing journey, but you get what I mean. I think the word heal implies that there's something wrong with you when there isn't, and I just associate the word heal with like a roll-eye energy, like the healing journey, but I just don't know what else to call it to be honest. So I was like, okay, we'll just go with that. But at the start of my journey into understanding what the hell had happened to me, like I literally just left an emotionally abusive relationship, I had been there for 11 years, and I really wanted to understand why my brain had let me be in there for 11 years and why my brain could not see another perspective, like why it kept me in there. So my podcast is all about neuroscience but mixed in with spirituality as well, to literally give you guys the clarity that I needed back in the day when I was just like, What the hell just happened to me? I just could not figure it out. And after years and years and years of research, trial and error, doing different healing modalities, going to therapy, doing this, reading this book, looking at this like course, literally just doing all the things for so so long. This is the highest frequency information that has changed my life. This is the thing. So the first mini-series, the first part of it, I was talking about my experience, so you guys can see that I'm the real deal, that you know what I'm talking about. In the second part, I talked about my childhood programming. I'm not sure why I like the word programming either, but that's what our brain is. Our brain basically runs on programs, it runs on automatic thought patterns. We have a 5% conscious brain that we are consciously aware of, and a 95% subconscious brain, which basically means that most of our thought patterns of our automatic reactions of our actions that we put out into the world are just below our conscious awareness, which means we are actually not aware of the things we are telling ourselves in our own heads, and these limiting belief systems, like a belief, is just repeated messaging, it's not an inner knowing. So these types of thought patterns are formed in well, they literally can be formed from anywhere. So obviously, childhood is just literally the huge biggest one, but it's also repeated messaging from marketing, from the outside world, from social media, it can also be from a traumatic experience that you had, and this could be like a one-off experience, or it could be repeated experiences, and basically your nervous system has like marked that experience and it is now living within your body. So every time you encounter some type of similar experience, that's basically what we call a trigger. When someone basically triggers you, you go back, your body, your nervous system goes back to that moment in time and thinks that whatever is going on is a threat, that you are in danger, that you are going back to that moment where you experience a trauma or basically a highly elevated emotion. And this could be yes, crazy, crazy things, but it also could be you're crying as a two-year-old and no one picked you up. It could be you are talking in class, you've got like the stage, and you are on stage and you're talking, you've got like a presentation, a show and tell, whatever the thing is, and you might clock someone laughing at you, and in that moment in time, your brain has decided that people laugh at you when you talk out loud, and basically it's just a running program that goes in your brain, goes in your brain, and repeated messaging when you have an elevated emotion attached to that kind of experience, and usually, yes, you can have like you know, nice elevated emotions, but what we're talking about at this moment in time is usually negative associated negative um emotions. No emotions are negative or positive, but in our human perception, they are so when we experience something that gave us an elevated negative experience, an elevated negative emotion, we clock that, we clock that in our brains, we clock that in our body, and basically our brains, our body are so so amazing. They don't want us to experience that again, they don't want us to experience that pain, that anger, that harm, that hurt. It's always scanning our reality. We have a reticular activating system in our brain that basically scans our reality and feeds back our reality to make our belief systems to prove that our belief systems are true, and the reason is that it wants to keep us safe. So, for example, let's say that somebody laughed at me when I was on stage when I was, I don't know, like seven years old or something, and this really made a repeating thought pattern in my brain that when I talk out loud, when I try and voice an opinion, that people laugh at me, people will laugh at me, and my brain, if I literally feed that thought, it will become a subconscious thought pattern. I might not even be consciously aware that I'm thinking this, but it will be in my brain, it will be in my body, and I'll basically be scanning my reality to make sure that that experience does not happen to me again. It's super, super interesting. Like, I've just done so much research about this for years and years to help me understand why I was in these kind of dynamics, and it just gave me so much clarity, it gave me so much understanding, like I understood myself more, I understood my brain, I I got why I literally couldn't leave and why I didn't get what was happening to me. And if you don't watch any other podcast episode of mine, if you literally just after a minute switch this off, this is what I want everybody in the world to hear. Like, this isn't spiritual woo-woo, this is literally your brain. Everything that you're experiencing right now, like your reality, is because of your subconscious. So if you're having financial problems at the moment, it's your subconscious. If you don't like where you're living, it's your subconscious mind, like it's not the world being shit to you, it's not other people being awful to you, it's you, it's your subconscious mind. How I literally up-leveled my whole life was combining spiritual knowledge with neuroscience tools. But if you just literally switch off after this episode, whatever, but that's all I want people to realize is the key to whatever you want in this world, whatever your goal is, whatever you want is in your subconscious mind, and we are literally operating from our subconscious 95% of the time, which means 95% of everything that we are doing in the day is below our conscious awareness, and that seems so so crazy because when I first heard this, I was like, that's bullshit. Like, I completely know what's going on. Like, how can I have 95% of my subconscious? Like, and I don't know what's going on, that just does not make sense, but you don't know what you don't know. We are only aware of the 5% because that's what we've always known, because that's what we have access to. Your subconscious mind is like an iceberg. Imagine an iceberg, and you see the tip of the iceberg, that is the conscious brain, and what is underneath the iceberg, you know, like huge, huge, huge iceberg normally is underneath what you can see above, that's the subconscious, and it is the foundation, like it is the thing, the iceberg is the thing underneath the water, it's not the little tip that's coming out the top, which in this analogy is the conscious brain. So if you just don't listen to anything else, whatever you're looking for, whatever you're wanting out of life, it is in your subconscious. So just go do loads of research on it. Go, like honestly, read books, audiobooks, podcasts, whatever your thing is, however, you get information into your brain, whatever you are looking for, you'll find it in there. So we talked about my experiences, we talked about childhood programming and basically the subconscious mind in general, and then we spoke about the creator field, which is basically our electromagnetic field, and that literally that attracts our reality into our life. Imagine I heard this and I just absolutely bloody love it. I just loved it and I think about it a lot all the time, and it helps me, it helps me to realize more about what the creator field is. Imagine that we're all in the video game, okay. Imagine we're all in a video game and we're walking around and we're basically like rendering our reality as we're walking, we're rendering our reality as we're walking. Now, that sounds crazy, but honestly, there's so much scientific evidence about that. Like, I am gonna do so so much in-depth scientific stuff to get my own analytical brain around it and to get other people's analytical brains around it as well. But just imagine you're rendering your reality, okay. Just play with me here, and while you're doing that, whatever you are seeing can only come into your reality because of what you are radiating out, so because of your electromagnetic field, and then it's you are pulling it into your reality, you're pulling in different circumstances, situations, people, dynamics, what people are saying to you, how you perceive things to be, how you interpret your own reality is because of your subconscious mind and because of your creator field. So, just to recap the whole like narcissistic dynamic that I was seeing, I had a limiting belief that was in my subconscious. I had no idea that it was there. Basically, every time that I thought about myself, I suppressed it and I thought it was bad to think about myself. I thought that it was bad and selfish to put myself first. I literally just every time I had a thought about me, I snapped myself out of it. This was all childhood programming, not just through parents, guys, through all childhood, through things that I was watching on TV, through education programs, teachers, child minders, other family members. I don't want to put everything on my actual like parents. This is just the world that I lived in when I was a child. Basically, it taught me to just not think about myself, to not put myself first, to always put other people first. And I'm also beforehand, I was speaking about being Catholic, and I just really wanted to say that I absolutely loved being Catholic. I loved that it gave me an awareness that there is something bigger than me. I don't think I would have been able to go straight into spirituality having not been Catholic and just having that inner knowing that there is a God, there is something bigger, whatever you want to call it, source the universe. It's basically a word for the same thing, it's like a parent energy. We had to come from something, and whatever our parent energy is, we have still a connection to it. We must do so. I loved that, and also I loved prayer. Now I do something really different, I just call it like setting intentions. Like it is the same thing. I'm literally walking around setting intentions all the time. If my dad saw what I was doing, he would interpret that as prayer. If my grandma saw me and like heard what I was saying, she'd be like, Oh, she's praying. Everybody has their own interpretation of what we are doing, and I'm again not saying that being a Catholic was like, Oh my god, it was so awful. I actually had a beautiful, beautiful childhood, and I just want to put that out there, and I learned so many amazing things from it. There's always gonna be, you know, pros and cons of every situation, and my childhood programming, my baby brain just picked up on limiting thought patterns and built it up in my electromagnetic field in my subconscious. I was not consciously aware of it, but I just want to put that out there. There is nothing wrong with being Catholic, there's nothing wrong. Okay, I loved the experience, I love the things that I took from it. My baby brain just picked up on different programming, so I've got this subconscious thought pattern that every time I think about myself, it's wrong. I shouldn't, I shouldn't, I shouldn't. And guys, our brains, this is mad when I realize this. I was like, whoa, our subconscious brains have no idea that anyone else exists in this universe, it has no idea that anyone else exists in this universe, so my subconscious is always going to be thinking about me, what I should be doing, like how I should be acting, it's always going to be about me. You are the universe, I am the universe. Like, this is my lifetime. My subconscious brain is always going to be talking and thinking about me, it's always going to be scanning for threats for me, it's always going to be doing things for me. So every time I had a conscious awareness that I was thinking about myself, I shoved it back down. But I'm always going to be thinking about myself in my subconscious because my subconscious has no idea that there's another living soul on this planet, which is another reason why I absolutely loved the episode about confession by projection. If you're interested in this topic, please go and have a look. Super, super, super fascinating. So I had a thought pattern that I was thinking about myself too much. Everything is just a perception because I wasn't thinking about myself too much, because this whole lifetime is about me. But because in my subconscious thought pattern, it was I'm thinking about myself too much, I'm thinking about myself too much, it's all about me, it's all about me, it's all about me. Then I attracted someone to reflect back to me what I was thinking in my subconscious, so then you are going to attract a person that is just thinking about themselves to reflect that back, like you can use your creative field in the most amazing ways. This is actually what happened to me, guys. Now, I'm not saying that everybody has to have the same childhood experiences as me to have this brain programming, I'm just saying that you, if you've experienced narcissistic dynamic, then this would have been in your subconscious. You feel like you are thinking about yourself too much, and you shouldn't be. Your creator field, your reality, is always going to reflect back what is in your energy. So if you're not liking what you're seeing in your reality at this moment in time, it's literally just reflecting back a part of you, and because it is a part of you, you can change it, you can change it through neuroscience tools. It has been done. I have been doing this for years and years. I have literally changed everything in my whole life through changing my electromagnetic field. And if you don't believe in that, that's cool. I didn't for the literally for like a whole when I first heard of this, I was like bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. I was like, no, like I've just well, I never heard that of that in science. I just went on a whole journey, went down the rabbit hole, and I completely get why people would be wary of something that they haven't heard of before because I have been there, and I'm always just going to be an open, honest book and literally be like, I had that too, and it was only when I went through and but back all like my memories or my experiences that I had been in my life, and I remembered the mindset and the thought patterns that I had back then, and it clicked that all the thought patterns I had back then were reflecting the dynamics that I was experiencing at that time in my life. It is just amazing, and what really really installed this belief is when I did start to do self-development work when I started to shift through using the neuroscience tools, and I changed my creator field, and then I saw different situations like people being completely different to me, and I was like, holy shit, it works, it it's mad, and yeah, I don't know what else to say, just go and try it for yourself, or just like I get a journal, write down experiences that you've had in your lifetime, and then think, okay, what was I like? What kind of mental state was I in at that moment in life? What was going on in my life? Was my mental state and how I was being to myself reflecting my outer reality? Because I always thought, guys, I'm 38 in human years, literally for like 37 human years, 37 years, I thought if I did something to someone else, so if I was like a really, really good girlfriend, like if I helped someone else, they would help me, but it's not that at all. It's are you helping yourself? I thought that if I wasn't self-critical to my my ex, if I was supportive to him, if I was super nice to him, he would be super supportive to me, and for years, 11 uh years, I waited for that to be reflected back. For 11 years, I waited for a nice word for him to be supportive to me, for him to just big me up or just say. Something positive or something nice, and all I got was criticism, criticism, criticism. It doesn't matter what you put out to other people. I'm always going to say, obviously, still be the best person to other people, but the most thing that you needed to think about, prioritize how you are being to yourself. I was self-critical to myself in my own head. So he had no choice to reflect that back into my reality, to reflect that back to me, to show me that I needed to shift, to get back into balance. It is only there to show you how to get back onto path, like how to shift your perception, how to shift back into basically like happiness. I was not happy, I was not happy to myself, and it was there to show me how to shift back into happiness, but I focused so much on the other person. I was always so focused on the other person. He's doing this to me, that happened to me. Oh my god, she's like being a complete bitch to me. And it's literally, I I feel guys, I feel like I've wasted my whole life wasting all my energy on how other people are being when I could have just been working on myself. I know intuitively, and this is really really hard for me to say. Like honestly, I know that I could have done this sooner, that I could like I could have literally done this 10 years ago. I am an intuitive, I know that this could have been done sooner, but I was just repeating patterns, repeating patterns, repeating patterns, and I'm literally just putting my shit out there because I don't want anybody else to repeat another fucking year of their shit thinking that the other person needs to change when it's them that needs to change. I don't want another person out there to repeat the same fucking day, let alone a year. 11 years guys, repeating the same fucking day, waiting for him to be nice to me when all I had to do was be nice to myself, like fuck me. That is like the saddest but the most amazing thing that I've ever heard, and honestly, someone out there is gonna have a huge aha moment like I did. This is just life-changing, and now I'm gonna go into how I did it, guys. So, how I reprogrammed my brain because it's so easy for me to be like, right, you know, shift, shift your energy, reprogram your brain. How the fuck did you do it? And I again for years and years and years research this, and I've just done so many different modalities, and I'm just gonna say, What how I did it the best modality that worked for me was basically changing my memories, looking back through my memories, and then changing them. That was the best thing for me. There's loads of different ways that you can access your subconscious mind. There's breath work, there's meditation, there's hypnosis, there's so many different ways. This is what I did. I reprogrammed my brain through neuroscience tools, and whatever my limiting belief was, I've done this with loads of different limiting beliefs, I've done this with self-worth, I've done this with the fear of being seen. Like, I'm literally sitting here on a podcast. There's no way that I would have been able to do this years ago, and I worked on my fear of being seen. Honestly, guys, I I couldn't even talk in a friendship group. People who know me now, if you would have met me a few years ago, you would have been like, Oh my god, she's a bloody mute. Like, I did not talk. I did not talk. I was a nodder, guys. I was a smile and nod person. You know what I mean? I was one of them people like what for me to actually have an opinion. Oh my god, for me to actually like talk in a conversation. Wow, this is just reflection work from me. Like, I have just done so much work on myself, and how I did that, like, I don't understand when people are like, oh, just push yourself, and like, yes, you've got to have that mentality as well. But when you've got a subconscious program that literally thinks that you are going to fucking die if you speak out loud, that was what my brain programming is. It doesn't matter how much you try and push yourself because the 5% conscious awareness of your subcont of your subconscious mind, 5% of your conscious awareness is not going to tackle, it's not going to do anything against the 95% of the subconscious brain. Imagine the iceberg analogy again. So it's like the tip of the iceberg, the tip of the iceberg can't do fuck all to the whole iceberg that's underneath the ocean. Like it's just super, super hard. I don't know how other people have done that. I don't think that they have. I think that they must have just done something subconsciously and they didn't realize it. But you have to access your subconscious brain. So basically, for me to even be here, I access my subconscious brain and I changed my limiting belief. Instead of fearing talking out loud, I put positivity in talking out loud. I said it was safe to my brain. Like, yes, we will like we will get fulfillment for talking out loud. This is what our soul came here to do. It is safe for me to have an opinion, and I it's like, guys, I'm not gonna lie, it's a lot of work, it was work, you have to do like daily. I did this, I did this daily, and I just thank the previous version of me that did that, and when I saw a huge change, then I focused on other things. I focused on self-worth, I focused on self-love, I focused on my body image. It is so so mad. If you saw photos of me, I've literally looked the exact same, I've looked the exact same, guys. I was like a size 8 to 10 when I was 16. I'm 38, I'm a size 8 to 10. I've always been the same size, and this is the most comfortable and confident I have been in my body. I absolutely love my body, and I've looked the exact same, nothing's actually changed within my body. I actually feel like I probably have more cellulite, I've probably got more like lines and stuff on my face, but I just love myself more, so I'm seeing myself, I'm seeing my body in a different way. My brain is allowing myself to see myself in a different way. It is just mental. So, this is how, first of all, you need to know what it is that you need to reprogram, and I've done this through intuition. Like you need to be self-aware of what you you know your thing is that you need to work on at this time. If you're listening to this specific episode, then it probably has got to do with like self-worth because me feeling that I can't think about myself, that I can't do something for myself, that it was selfish of me to put myself first, that all comes down to self-worth. So my first thing was like actually, you know what? I had a lot of things to reprogram. I had a lot of things to reprogram. Oh my gosh. But yeah, self-worth was a huge one, the fear of being seen was a huge one, the not being self-critical to myself in my own head, that was a huge one. Like, they were all huge, huge ones, like because it all up leveled my reality in a huge way through intuition. I can basically be like if I need to do that again, which we all need to be working on ourselves, it's just what we are here to do, which is not really taught about it. We're all here to work on ourselves to do the inner work so it changes our external world, so we get the soul growth, so we get the memories, so we get the fulfillment. So, me at this time, I intuit what my higher self wants me to work on at this moment, what is going to give me the greatest growth, and then I work on that. So, literally, there's so many things out there, guys. Like, there's so many different ways to access your subconscious mind and change your limiting beliefs, and again, I do this intuitively because there's so many modalities. I'm not gonna just say this is the exact way to do it because we have all different brain programmings, we have all come here to learn different lessons, and our healing modalities will probably be very different. So, there's so many different ways. What I would suggest to do is have a look online, set the intent if this is what you want to do, if you do want to change your reality, set the intent, say it out loud, say it in your head, right? Hi self. I want to get the best healing modality for me at this moment in time. Like, what do you want me to explore? What do you want me to come across? What do you think is going to be the greatest growth for me right now? Have a little Google, whatever comes at the top, that's for you guys. Like, it's that simple. That is what intuition is there to do. Your higher self is always leading you and putting you in front of information. That's the perfect information for us. We just don't have belief in ourselves, and we just think, oh no, that's a con uh coincidence, like we can't be doing that, or we just dismiss things when it's literally been put in front of our bases for our highest growth. So if this is really calling to you and you really do want to change something, have a little Google. Honestly, the best way to do it is through train if I can get my words out, trained intuition. This, after everything that I have been through, now I can just intuit within like 10 seconds, maybe less. Be like, okay, this is what you need to do, this is the way to do it. Intuition is absolutely amazing and incredible. But if you haven't got trained intuition, it's all good. It doesn't mean that you need to be stuck, still keep working on it. There's so many things out there, just see it as like, okay, I'm gonna be curious, come with it with the energy of curiosity, and honestly, like whatever you come across, don't tell yourself it's wrong, it is right. Whatever you come across, it's the perfect thing, the perfect timing for you to explore. If you have been in this type of dynamic and done loads of like healing work on it, which is exactly what happened to me, you might be thinking, but why? Again, this is what I thought. I was like, but why did that happen to me? So, with the creator field, it basically, if you have a reflection, what I call like reflections, most people call them like triggers. Basically, everything is a reflection of your energy anyway. But if you have a trigger moment that is calling your attention to something, to say that you have basically got an emotional imbalance, that you have fallen out of happiness, that you have perceived yourself in a different way, you have a misperception of self, and it is showing you this trigger for you to get back into balance. So, this is the the difference between emotional imbalances and soul paths that I'm going to get into right now. So, every time you get a trigger, it is literally just showing you your misperception of self and it's telling you where you need to basically heal, where you need to do inner work, it's not the other person. I would absolutely love to be like, Yes, it's the other person, we don't need to do anything, we could just sit here and watch TV and blah blah blah blah blah and it's just the other person stuff. No, everything in this world is about us, and if somebody else triggers you, unfortunately, it means you need to shift something from within you, and that thing won't trigger you anymore, or you just won't see it in your reality. With me, I have intuited that my relationship dynamic for 11 years, my past relationship dynamic was a soul path, so it was something that my soul wanted to experience. Cheers, like honestly, cheers, but my soul wanted to experience it to really live and breathe it and get all these different angles to understand everything that there is to understand about these kind of emotionally abusive dynamics from the emotional aspect of it to the gaslighting to the manipulation to the narcissism to the physical abuse to everything that there is to literally have to experience. My soul chose that, and the reason why is to help other people. This is a soul path, is if it is a repeating pattern, if it's a repeating pattern in your life, most likely your soul has chosen to experience it, so you can gain so much knowledge and soul growth from it, but also probably it's also to help other people, it's to be like, Okay, I've had this experience now. I can take it out into the world and help other people with it, even if it's one other person, even if it's literally just one other person. I am saying this because we are all here to basically surf, and we're all here to basically elevate the frequency of the earth, even if you're doing that with like a product, it doesn't have to be a service, it doesn't have to be okay. Um, I'm a spiritual teacher or whatever. You could be helping people um with a product, it could be something that is like absolutely amazing, amazing product that's going to change people's lives. That could be something fucking inventive, or it could be a toilet brush. I know that that sounds crazy, but it's still gonna change people's lives. Like it doesn't matter about the capacity, we are all here to change the frequency of the planet and to help other people. So if you have experienced this kind of dynamic in a way where you just can't understand like what the actual hell, there's no way that I can help somebody with that. But have you spoken to other people about it? Like maybe you haven't, but you might in the future. Honestly, like everything that we go through, we go through for a bigger reason. It might just be soul growth, but I really, really do feel that we are all here to help other people, and I know that I went through that dynamic to help other people to experience it. So, other people, when they come to me and they're like, which I have had my whole life, which is absolutely mad, when they're like, Oh god, this happened to me. I'm like, Yeah, that's fine, that happened to me for like five years, or like I'm just not shocked by what people are saying, I'm very emotionally in neutral, and I can advise and suggest straight away because I have been through it. So, this is the difference between a soul path and an emotional imbalance. Spoiler alert, you still have to have the emotional imbalance. So, with a soul path, I still have to have the emotional imbalance to have that attracted into my reality for me to even see that so I could get onto my soul path, so I could experience it in my life. So, even if something is a soul path, you still have to have the emotional imbalance, and there's so many different timelines out there, you can shift your emotional imbalance to shift back into self unconditional self-love, to shift shift back into happiness, whatever you think, um, whatever your like feeling is, whatever you want to call that neutral loving state. It's basically just there to show you that you have a limiting belief about self and that you can you can shift it. It's just there showing you where you have a limiting belief about yourself, a misperception of self, and you can shift it. When I'm channeling, I like stutter so much because I have so much information in my head and I'm just like trying to get it out because I'm so passionate about this, it's so funny because when I edit it and I'm just like editing it, and all I can hear is so yeah, I'll probably have to do a lot of editing, which is absolutely hilarious, but it's just because I'm so passionate about it because I know that this is gonna change someone's life. And for the ending of this episode, I just want to talk about why other people can't see the narcissistic quality that you could experience. Some people do see it, some people don't. I had this for such a long time when I was talking about my ex-boyfriend, and I with some people I would talk about him and they'd be like, Yeah, I saw that from day one, and other people are like I have not experienced that from him. I literally just see him as like a really fun, friendly person, like he's really nice to me, he's done that to me. I've only seen him be nice to you. I don't know what you're on about. For the life of me, this frustrated me so much, and I would literally just like bring up situations, I would bring up memories, and I'd be like, Well, what about this party? I just like spat, I'm so so passionate, I just spat. Oh my god, I'd be like, What about this party and this memory at this like exact certain time when he said this to me and everybody like was silent, and they'd be like, Oh, I don't remember that. And then I would bring up another memory, and I would like, you know, this was years ago. Sometimes I'd bring up text messages, what about this? What do you think of this? And they'd they'd read it and they'd be like, I just don't see it in that way. I'd be like, You fucker, what the hell is wrong with you? Honestly, it would just frustrate me for the craziest, craziest time. I figured out why, guys, because they have a different electromagnetic field, they can't see that perception because they literally cannot have it filtered into their reality because they have a different subconscious mind, they have something completely different, so their reticular activating system is helping them perceive their reality in a completely different way, which is why some people see dynamics, like let's say, okay, let's say there's an argument in the street, and there's so many people walking around, and so many people looking at that argument. One person could be like, Go girl, you know, go girl, like you tell him kind of thing. Another person could be like, oh my god, like they're literally just about to beat each other up. That is absolutely crazy. I need to call the other the police. Another person could be like, Well, that's absolutely hilarious. I'm gonna film that. Another person could be like, how dare they bring their stuff into the public? It needs to be kept. Kept quiet, put like go back into your house. And if you've got conflict, you say it behind closed doors. Somebody else could be like, Oh my god, that person is like gaslighting that other person. Another person could be like, Well, that man is bullying that woman, another person could perceive it and be like, That woman is, oh my god, like she is bullying that man, she's emotionally abusing that man. Everybody is perceiving their reality in a different way according to their subconscious beliefs, which was programmed through mainly childhood, but also the outside world that we live in at this moment in time. Their subconscious has literally created thought patterns. Your thought patterns help make your actions, your memories are also in your electromagnetic field, just a whole big concoction of you. So you will only see your reality based on your own energy, which is why some people literally cannot see the side that you saw of the person in your relationship. They cannot see it because it is not in their electromagnetic field, it's not in their subconscious brain, their reticular activating system is filtering out their brain differently. So it doesn't matter how much like evidence you you bring up or how much you really, really like sit someone down and tell them all of this stuff, the person could empathize with you, of course. Like we all have empathy, but it doesn't mean that they will perceive it in your way, and it also means like, do you know? Do you ever feel like you've just really clicked with someone? Because oh, you see that person in the same way, and you're just like, Yeah, that person really, really gets me. It's usually because you have very similar subconscious brains, you see reality the same way, you perceive people in the same light, so you click, you are an energy match for each other because you perceive the reality that you are in in a very similar way, which blew my mind as well. What I want to be the biggest takeaway from this episode, from this whole mini-series, is one okay. This whole life is about you. This whole lifetime is about you. Whether you believe in reincarnation or not, I have an inner knowing that reincarnation is real. I only get to be Emily in this lifetime, like this lifetime is about Emily. If you don't believe, you know what? If you don't believe in reincarnation, then it's even more like holy fuck, if you really think that we only have one life, like wow, that's even more a motivation to be like, okay, if you get one life, then fucking live it for yourself. Put yourself first. We are here to put ourselves first, we are here to literally fulfill our soul's mission. Our subconscious brain can only perceive our reality that we are living in. It literally only thinks that we are on this planet Earth. So just forget about other people for a minute because that's what your subconscious brain does 24/7 on the clock all the time. It is not selfish to think about yourself, put yourself first. This is what we are here to do. That is one key takeaway that I want someone to understand. Another key takeaway is if you don't like what you are seeing in your reality at this moment in time, you can change it. You can change it. Our brains are malleable. We have neuroplasticity in our brains, which basically is the power to change our neural pathways. For example, with me, my neural pathway was going towards like negative low self-worth. I had low self-worth, I changed that to high self-worth. You can do it. Like thousands, hundreds, millions of people are teaching this right now. It's just not like I was about to say it's not really mainstream. In someone's reality, it's mainstream, in my reality, it's not mainstream, it's not like an unheard of thing. The creator field is very unheard of, but the whole subconscious mind thing that's not unheard of. Like, this is just how our brain works. You can change your reality, you can have your reticular activating system to filter your reality different if you change yourself, and that is what I want to leave you with. I love you guys so so much. Thank you, thank you so much for being with me for listening to this whole mini series. If you have listened to this little mini-series, then it means that you probably have experienced this kind of dynamic in the past or you're experiencing it now. And I really want to honor what you have experienced, it doesn't take away from what we've experienced. We are all here to feel our emotions, and all of our emotions, all our experiences are valid. It doesn't take away from what you've experienced, it just means that you can take control of it and you can change it. Please feel free to send this to someone who you might think is going to really benefit from listening to it. Whoever pops into your head that is the perfect person to send it to. Please feel free to get on my email list, guys. Like, honestly, get on the website, it takes two seconds. Get on the email list. I am going to be coming out with the most amazing things, and you guys will be the first people to know. You also get notifications of when a new podcast is live. Again, thank you so much for listening, and I will see you all in the next one. The next one, guys, is going to be such a super special episode, very, very much down to my heart because I'm going to have my sister from Qatar on the green sofa with me. She's literally going to be in the UK. We are going to do an amazing, amazing episode together. So come back next week to listen to that one. See you then.