HSOS #5: Why Women Over 40 Should Stop Weighing Themselves

The scale has never told the full story. In this episode, Kim shares her personal journey of letting the number on the scale define her worth and why women over 40 need to stop chasing weight loss. She explains how hormones, metabolism, and muscle change in midlife, why strength and protein are the true keys to fat loss, and how to measure progress without relying on the scale. This shift opens the door to more energy, confidence, and vitality—and sets the stage for the 5-Day Midlife Momentum Challenge.

Let’s talk.

Welcome to Her Season of Strength—where women over 40 reclaim their bodies, their energy, and their voices, without apologies. I'm Kim Duffy—registered dietitian, personal trainer, mom, and your biggest hype woman when it comes to aging like you mean it.

This show isn’t about chasing skinny or counting wrinkles. It’s about building real strength—physical, emotional, and hormonal. Each week, I’ll share straight-talking nutrition tips, sustainable fitness strategies, and conversations that help you feel powerful in your skin once again.

Menopause is not an ending, it is only the beginning. This is your season of strength.

📝 What You’ll Hear in This Episode

• Kim’s college story of weighing herself daily and letting the scale define her worth
• Why weight loss is the wrong goal for women over 40
• The limitations of the scale and BMI in measuring health
• Hormonal changes in peri- and post-menopause that impact fat storage
• How age-related muscle loss slows metabolism and increases fat gain
• Why muscle is the true marker of health and success in midlife
• The benefits of strength training for metabolism, bone health, mood, and balance
• Practical ways to measure progress without the scale:
  • Increases in strength and reps
  • Steadier energy and better recovery
  • Clothes fitting differently and body composition changes
  • Improved mobility and endurance
  • Confidence and mindset shifts
• The role of protein in satiety, blood sugar balance, cravings, and muscle repair
• Simple protein goals and food swaps to make meals more satisfying
• The mindset shift from “How do I lose weight?” to “How can I get stronger?”
• Invitation to join the free 5-Day Midlife Momentum Challenge starting September 15th, 2025.  Get registered at: https://www.strengthinnutrition.com/5-day-free-fitness-challenge

Links & resources for this episode:

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Free cheat sheet: "20 Tips to Crushing Menopause"

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Hi there, and welcome to her season of Strength, where women over 40 reclaim their bodies, their energy, and their voices, without apologies. I'm Kim Duffy, registered dietician, personal trainer, mom, and your biggest hype woman. When it comes to aging like you mean it, this show isn't about chasing skinny or counting wrinkles.

It's about building real strength, physical, emotional, and hormonal. Each week, I'll share straight talking, nutrition tips, sustainable fitness strategies. And conversations that help you feel powerful in your skin. Once again, menopause isn't an ending. It's only the beginning. This is your season of strength.

Hey there and welcome back to her season of strength. I wanna take you back just for a minute in this episode. To me in college, envision me standing on a bathroom scale every single morning and not just standing there. I made sure I didn't have a lick of clothing on 'cause heaven forbid. Any kind of clothing, adding an extra ounce or two to that weight, and every day [00:01:00] that number decided how I felt about myself if it was up.

I punished myself with extra exercise or cutting calories. If it was down, I rewarded myself, quote unquote. My entire worth was wrapped up in what that number said, and I know I'm not alone. I see women every single day coming to me with those same. Struggles and that scale dictating every day how they feel about themselves.

And so many women carry that same baggage with the scale. But here's the truth, the scale has never told us the full story. That's why in today's episode we're gonna flip that script. We're gonna talk about why women over 40 need to stop chasing weight loss and stop letting that scale dictate their success and what we should be focusing on instead.

Things like strength muscle. Building a metabolism that actually works with us and for us rather than against us. So let's get into it. First of all, why weight loss is the wrong goal? First of all, the [00:02:00] scale does not me, measure your health, your energy levels, or your strength and fitness. Says nothing about that.

That's why we've gotten away from that BMI term. 'cause BMI doesn't tell you how much muscle you have. You can have a guy who's 300 pounds, but he is full of muscle that says he is morbidly obese because of his BMI, when that man is actually in very good health. Maybe he doesn't have any other kind of factors as far as high cholesterol or diabetes or cardiovascular disease.

Any other the other risk factors. So that scale doesn't measure those things. Our weight also naturally fluctuates daily. It's gonna fluctuate because of, maybe we're well hydrated or dehydrated, maybe our hormones are up or down. Especially, in perimenopause, before your period, we know that you bloat because of that estrogen increase.

And then after your period, we know that you're gonna have less water weight because of that progesterone. And then lastly, digestion. Obviously if you haven't pooped in a day or two, you're gonna, [00:03:00] your weight's gonna be higher than if you're going regularly. And lastly, chasing that lower number, it's just gonna lead us to frustration.

It's gonna lead us to yo-yo dieting and it's also gonna lead us to that loss of muscle. Why is that? Is because, when we are doing those quick. Fix diets when we're constantly striving to lose weight, when we're losing weight too quickly, and we're not focused on, getting in adequate protein and fueling our bodies well.

And also combining it with strength training. We are gonna see muscle loss and in the end, that's gonna lead to a decrease in the number of calories we're burning every day, or our, in other words, our metabolism. So what really changes after age 40? We know that we have hormonal shifts, right?

We're seeing, estrogen and progesterone. Now during perimenopause, we can see them up and down, causing irregular periods, longer periods, heavier periods, shorter periods. But then once we hit menopause and we are in post menopause, [00:04:00] that estro, those estrogen and progesterone levels are lower, but we are gonna see more.

Storage of fat and specifically it is gonna cause more storage of fat in our belly area. That is natural and that is normal due to that change in our hormones. But there are ways that we can counteract that. Secondly, muscle mass declines just naturally three to 8% per decade without strength training.

When we're not strength training, we are gonna see just a natural decline with age of our muscle, and thus we're also gonna see that natural decrease in our metabolism. So that's where, you might say I'm eating the exact same amount of calories or the. The same diet that I've always eaten, but all of a sudden I'm seeing weight gain.

And that's why is because our body doesn't need as many calories as it did before because we don't have as much muscle and our metabolism is declining. So that's where we can see just that natural slow steady weight gain once we hit 40 and especially after we hit [00:05:00] menopause our resting metabolic great.

It slows. Typically women burn around 150 fewer calories per day simply from muscle loss with age. And stress and sleep changes can also increase our cortisol levels, which is that fight or flight hormone. And can, that can promote more fat storage as well. So that's where, techniques to improve.

Or deal with stress better as well as promote better quality and quantity of sleep. Can make a difference when it comes to those levels. So why is muscle the new goal? Weight? Muscle drives metabolism. The more muscle we have, the more calories that we are gonna burn at rest. So strength training helps us to improve bone health, joint health, mood, and balance.

What is strength training? That's resistance training. That is. Something where you're using resistance or weight to challenge those muscles, to fatigue those muscles and in then the [00:06:00] adaptation of those muscles. And once we rest and let them heal, they are gonna get stronger. Okay? But strength training also is gonna improve our bone health, which we know, we know that our bones become less dense as we get older, and especially once we hit menopause it's gonna help to improve joint health.

And it's gonna improve mood, our mental health as well. I know that this is huge for me. Exercise is, it is my therapy. I don't know, when I'm struggling, when I'm having a challenging day, when I'm stressed out or frustrated, there is nothing that will kick me in the butt and really. Help me to feel more focused, more productive, and help me to feel just better in general.

Happier is just movement and exercise. And then not to mention we do know, balance can be challenged as we get older. And strength training definitely helps with balance, especially when you're incorporating and balance training, which I do with all of my clients. Next, more muscle is going to [00:07:00] equal better insulin sensitivity.

Which is gonna promote less belly fat and fewer cravings. We know that management of our blood sugars. Is huge when it's it's just so important when it's related to our hormones keeping, supporting them, helping with our energy levels and helping with decreasing weight gain.

Insulin sensitivity and prevention of insulin resistance is very important. And strength training is a key factor to helping with that. And then also, an appearance shift. We know that we, we look stronger, leaner, even though that's, we're not gonna see that on the scale.

Even if we're not gonna see the scale going down, we can see inches lost because, muscle takes up less space than that same weight in fat. And losing inches, but we're not gonna necessarily see that on the scale. So how are, what are some ways that we can measure progress by not using the scale?

We can measure it by [00:08:00] increasing strength. So maybe we are lifting heavier weights. Maybe we are able to do more repetitions of exercises. Or maybe we're able to do new, exercises or moves that we couldn't do before. Maybe we can, take our pushups from our knees to our toes, or maybe we could never do a pull up before and now we can do a pull up.

Or maybe we just, can improve our form because our body is stronger. The next thing that we can use to measure progress is our energy levels. That's just huge. We know that those hormonal changes can make us feel more tired and more fatigued. So measuring your energy levels can really be a great way to measure progress.

If you're feeling less fatigued, if you're feeling that your energy levels are more steady during the day that can. Can also give us an indicator of that you're, balancing your macronutrients, that your blood sugars are, better and under better control, more regulated.

They're not, you're not [00:09:00] having those highs and lows in that rollercoaster of blood sugars because, your energy levels usually are gonna go up and down with that. So when your energy levels are more balanced, we know that you probably have a little bit better blood sugar control. And it also might indicate that you're sleeping better and your stress levels are lower too.

Next, your clothes can fit differently. Like I said, muscle is gonna take up less space than fat. So maybe, maybe you see that you're able to button your jeans a little easier. They're less tighter on the waist or your shirts are a little bit less tighter on the arms. That's an easy way to know.

We all know that feeling of oh gosh, I haven't, worn these jeans in a year. I didn't think I could wear 'em anymore. And now all of a sudden I can put 'em on. That goes hand in hand with body composition. So sometimes, rather than getting on the scale, if you are looking for fat loss, if you are looking for increasing strength, increasing muscle, you can do body composition measurements.

Maybe you do you check on like a bioelectrical impedance scale. And trend. [00:10:00] Trend that to see, how your numbers, taking measurements like waist to hip or arm measurements or even just taking progress photos. I think that's huge because you can see oh gosh, you know what?

I can tell that that I've lost some inches. I can tell that, my face look is less rounder. Or I just, I am. You just feel better, you look better. You feel more confident. I think progress photos, you can see that. Next is mobility and endurance, so you might find that you're climbing the stairs easier, you're able to walk further, you're recovering faster after exercise.

You know you're not sore for five days after, maybe you're a little bit sore the next day, and then after that you're like, you bounce back. Fine. And then lastly, the last way we can measure progress without the scale is just through our confidence and mindset. If you're feeling stronger mentally, if you feel like, you're standing a little taller, you're caring less about the scale this is also a great way to measure that progress.

But you know what, you're not gonna, you're not gonna know [00:11:00] these things, or you're not gonna pay attention to these things unless you pay attention to these things, right? And actually think about 'em, and maybe even journal. Where does protein fit into this, into, all of this getting away from the scale?

Protein is gonna help to support that muscle repair and growth, right? So if you are putting your time into strength training, then make sure that you're eating enough protein to help to support that muscle repair and growth protein is also gonna help us to feel fuller and more satisfied.

And thus decrease those cravings. It helps to promote that good blood sugar control that I was talking about before. And when your blood sugars are more steady, we're gonna see less ups and downs with energy levels. And we're also gonna see that, we're not looking for those sweets or treats or snacks two seconds after we eat dinner because it, the dinner will have been more filling and protein actually [00:12:00] even helps to turn off that.

Signal. That signal in your brain that tells you that you're hungry. It actually tells you, Hey, no, I'm good. I always use the analogy of, you, if you're eating a processed carb or if you're eating like a box of crackers or chips or something that, why is it that you can sit down while you're watching television and you can eat that entire sleeve of thin MIT Girl Scout cookies or that whole box of crackers or that whole bag of chips without even a thought, and that's just because.

Those carbohydrates are not feeling, they're not telling your body that you're done. They're hyper palpable. They're, they don't satiate, they don't tell you're full. Whereas, if you sit down and ate a chicken breast, you're not gonna sit there and eat until you've eaten a pound of it, right?

Usually after, four or five ounces. Depending, I guess on the person, if you're a big guy, you could probably eat a lot more. Usually after you have that you're like, okay, I'm good, I'm done. That's also why you're not gonna sit down and go, I just can't stop eating this giant bowl of [00:13:00] salad.

Fiber does the same thing as that protein is. It tells us that we're done. That's why, we incorporate good protein sources and good fiber sources with every single meal. We're gonna find that we eat a little bit less and with eating just a little bit less, we can see, ultimately that calorie deficit, which can promote weight loss.

So when it comes to protein, I want you to aim for 25 to 30 grams per meal. You're gonna spread it out through the day. So consistently, 25 to 30 grams, and just as a as a thought, one ounce of meat or fish or pork or beef or chicken or poultry is gonna be seven grams. So that means about four ounces of meter fish.

You can also get that from beans and legumes, black beans, garbanzo beans, chickpeas soy beans at a mame. Those are all great sources of protein. You're also gonna get it from dairy products, things like, yogurt or cottage cheese milk or cow's milk or soy milk. [00:14:00] Those are gonna be good sources of protein.

Swaps, do simple swaps out and change up your snacks and try to get, at least, I'd say try to get at least 10 grams of protein, each of your snacks as well. So next I want you to make that mindset shift. So instead of asking yourself, how do I lose weight? I want you to ask yourself, how can I get stronger?

What do I need to do to get stronger? How can I start, incorporating in some strength training, maybe with some dumbbells or barbells or kettlebells or resistance bands, or even just your own body weight. How can I start doing that? Next question is, how can I fuel my body better? How can I, maybe get rid of some of those more ultra processed foods that aren't providing me with the vitamins and the minerals and the nutrients that other foods might be.

How can I get in? A few extra grams of fiber a day. How can I get in a few extra, [00:15:00] grams of protein a day, or maybe I'm shooting for hitting that a hundred grams of protein in a day, but how can I fuel my body better so that it is actually feeling more full and satisfied? It's promoting better energy regulation as well as blood sugar regulation.

And lastly, how can I build a metabolism that actually works with me, not against me? And that goes right along with. The strength training building muscle because we know muscle burns, more calories than fat. Adding in that protein, which is also gonna help you to build muscle and to maintain, kind of combat that muscle loss that we're seeing happening just naturally as we're getting older and especially once we hit menopause.

So I'd like to close up this loop, and I just want to reiterate that the scale isn't the goal. Your strength, your muscle, your metabolism, and your confidence, that's what will carry you through [00:16:00] midlife with energy and vigor and vitality. If you're unsure where to start or if you feel like you need a little accountability and motivation to get started, I would love to have you join me and other women over 40 in my free five day Midlife Momentum challenge.

It starts here in just a few weeks. On September 15th, 2025, you're gonna get short. Effective workouts right into your very own phone app. You can do 'em anywhere, anytime you want. Gonna get daily nutrition challenges to help you fuel your body. Hello Protein and I have made short daily simple coaching videos to keep you motivated.

It's five days. Just to prove to yourself that you can do this and to build the momentum that you've been missing. I'm gonna drop the link in the show notes. Go ahead, sign up, and we're gonna do this together. And as always, if this episode resonated with you, I'd love for you to leave a rating share with a friend, or message me to let me know what landed for you.

And remember, this is about [00:17:00] progress over perfection. We're in this for the long haul and this is your season of strength.