HSOS #29: The Puzzle Pieces Your Hormones Have Been Waiting For

 Over 150 women from around the world kicked off Strong Start this week, all starting with simple strength workouts and a protein-first approach. Different countries, same complaints: low energy, stubborn weight gain, cravings, and bodies that suddenly feel unfamiliar. This episode breaks down the 5M System and why missing even one piece can make everything else feel harder than it needs to be. 

Let’s talk.

Welcome to Her Season of Strength—where women over 40 reclaim their bodies, their energy, and their voices, without apologies. I'm Kim Duffy—registered dietitian, personal trainer, mom, and your biggest hype woman when it comes to aging like you mean it.

This show isn’t about chasing skinny or counting wrinkles. It’s about building real strength—physical, emotional, and hormonal. Each week, I’ll share straight-talking nutrition tips, sustainable fitness strategies, and conversations that help you feel powerful in your skin once again.

Menopause is not an ending, it is only the beginning. This is your season of strength.

📝 Topics Covered (in order):

• 150 women, five countries, and a whole lot of shared midlife reality
• Why three 30-minute strength workouts were more than enough to start
• Protein as a focus, not a personality trait
• Ditching the “smaller is better” mindset for something way more powerful
• The shockingly similar struggles women everywhere are dealing with
• Why health works like a puzzle and missing pieces matter
• The 5M System and why it covers all the bases
• Macronutrients without rules pulled from your neighbor or Instagram
• Movement that goes beyond cardio guilt and step-count obsession
• Mindfulness and moderation as the reason this actually works long term

Links & resources for this episode:

Fit After 50+ Program: 8-Week Nutrition Coaching & Strength Program for menopausal women.  Join the interest list today for the best discounts, bonuses and updates about the next program coming Fall of 2026!

Free cheat sheet: "20 Tips to Crushing Menopause"

Join my free weekly newsletter list and get a new high protein recipe sent to your inbox every Thursday. 

Find me on social media: Instagram I Facebook I Tiktok

Transcript

[00:00:00] Hi there, and welcome to Her Season of Strength, where women over 40 reclaim their bodies, their energy, and their voices, without apologies. I'm Kim Duffy, registered dietitian, personal trainer, mom, and your biggest hype woman. When it comes to aging like you mean it, this show isn't about chasing skinny or counting wrinkles.

[00:00:20] It's about building real strength, physical, emotional, and hormonal. Each week, I'll share straight talking, nutrition tips, sustainable fitness strategies. And conversations that help you feel powerful in your skin. Once again, menopause isn't an ending. It's only the beginning. This is your season of strength.

[00:00:39] Hello and welcome back to Her Season of Strength. Thanks for just taking a couple minutes to listen into the episode today. So I wanted to start today by telling you about, the Strong Start program that started actually this past Monday, and I'm still kinda sitting with how awesome it's been. We had over 150 women sign up and [00:01:00] they were women from the United States, from the uk, from Canada, from Australia and New Zealand.

[00:01:06] Different time zones, different stages of life, but very similar stories, which. It always amazes me. And this first week was intentionally simple and the whole program I wanted to make very simple because I wanted to make it be about how women can create consistent habits. And the way we do that is by not doing crazy, overwhelming everything all at once.

[00:01:31] It's about doing these small changes and trying to be consistent with them, right? So we started really basic. We're doing three 30 minute workouts this week, so I get to do three live workouts. It's been fun. We do one upper body, one lower body, and one full body, and no crazy volume, no punishment or HIIT training.

[00:01:51] And then nutritionally, our only real focus this week was protein. Not perfection, not tracking everything. Not like 200 grams of [00:02:00] protein a day, 90 grams. That was it. I was just like, because my biggest thing was when I, when you're doing these group programs, you don't want to, I don't want somebody who's used to eating 40 grams of protein to have to.

[00:02:13] Go up to 180 grams of protein. That's just not, that's not sustainable, right? I'd much rather somebody say, okay, I normally eat 40 grams of protein this week. I'm gonna try for 50, or I'm gonna try for 60. Just taking those small steps much easier. And then Tuesday night we had our first live masterclass and it's, it was called from Smaller to Stronger.

[00:02:32] And it's just changing that mindset of the scale and constantly trying to shrink ourselves and I must get smaller and I must lose inches and I must, bring that number, special number down on the scale. And it was really cool 'cause, getting to know these women and being able to maybe give them a little bit of.

[00:02:52] Relief, brain relief, take away some of the stress of being a woman because sometimes we have a lot of [00:03:00] pressure put on us, as and I think especially for older women, women over fifties or forties or whatever we didn't grow up with, the understanding that, you don't necessarily talk about another woman's or a child's body.

[00:03:18] You don't talk about how, oh, you're getting a little chunky or whatever. And I remember my mom, frequently being on a diet, talking about, oh, I can't eat this or I can't eat that. And so we grew up thinking that was the norm, right? And, it's, so we're having to break the brainwashing.

[00:03:38] We're having to break some of those bad habits. But anyway, so getting to know these women in this masterclass, and, kinda starting discussions and stuff. I keep seeing the same themes coming up over and over again. Women talking about having those cravings in the afternoon and evening and, decreased energy and just that weight [00:04:00] gain that they don't know what they're doing wrong, they're doing all the same.

[00:04:03] The thing's the same, and they're still seeing that their weight is just slowly creeping up, and feeling that disconnect. Like their bodies aren't necessarily their own anymore, they're just, it's changing and they can't do much about it. And they may feel like they're doing everything right, but they're still feeling stuck.

[00:04:20] So it's just crazy, you can look worldwide and women from all over, but we're seeing some of the same frustrations. And during the masterclass, I shared something that I use with every single one of my nutrition coaching clients and in, in my group programs True too. And it's my framework that I call my five Ms.

[00:04:40] System and it's your system for basically for women's health overall. It's not for anything specific oh, this is just for fat loss, or this is just for lowering your cholesterol or lowering your diabetes, or whatever. It's for. Overall health in general and the way explained it to them all was [00:05:00] like, you think of your health like a puzzle, not a little kid's puzzle, but like one of those big ones with lots of pieces.

[00:05:05] And when most of the pieces are in place, things feel pretty solid, right? But even when one piece is missing, you can start to see those areas that are touching it start to cave in. So you might be, exercising consistently, but you're not eating enough. So therefore the exercise isn't.

[00:05:24] Isn't doing anything. You're not seeing progress, you're not seeing results from it, or you know you're eating healthy, but you're barely moving your body. So again, you're not seeing you're not seeing benefit, you're not seeing that you're gaining muscle or gaining tone or strength. Or you're doing your both, but then you're running on fumes because your stress is so high or you're not sleeping well, and so you're not seeing progress.

[00:05:49] All of these things are so important and then we start blaming ourselves. I created this system to make sure that we're not just focusing on one piece and hoping [00:06:00] that it magically holds everything together. So today I thought maybe I could talk a little bit about. My 5 M's and talk you through what I think are the most important areas when it comes to women's health and like I said, it's.

[00:06:13] Beneficial for any and all kind of health issues you might have because it covers all the bases. And I'm not saying, I'm telling you this because I want you to suddenly focus on all these things or, try to do them all at once, but just start seeing that maybe, which piece of the puzzle might be missing in your life.

[00:06:31] So my first m and if you can envision this is just basically like a circle and it's five puzzle pieces and they're all interlocking. And my first M is macronutrient balance. This is really my foundation, my base and what that is just looking at. Your balance of what you eat, how much are you getting in enough protein?

[00:06:53] Are you choosing the right types of carbohydrates, the ones you know that are gonna be the higher in fiber and the ones that are better for [00:07:00] you. Are you choosing healthy fats? Are you getting in enough fiber? And yes, total calories makes a difference. That's, I know calories are not a macro, but that it makes a difference, but.

[00:07:12] It all depends on what your goals are, right? So if you do have the goal of fat loss, we do need to create a deficit when it comes to total calories. And I'm super excited 'cause the next step that we're gonna be talking about next Tuesday is we're gonna be talking about how you can actually eat more.

[00:07:31] To crave less. And it's that mix macro macronutrient balance mix. And we talk about, what foods help to turn off the cravings, help to make us feel more full and satisfied, right? Most women they tell me I eat pretty healthy, quote unquote, but when we actually look closer, what I'm seeing is maybe they're, most women are not getting enough protein.

[00:07:51] That's a really common one, right? Then maybe, maybe the carbs are not necessarily the, they think they might be a healthy choice, but [00:08:00] maybe they're overly processed, maybe they're higher in sugar. And they're not realizing that sometimes, especially when we, load up carbs for breakfast, say that sometimes it perpetuates those cravings as the day goes on, it can actually make them worse.

[00:08:14] When we just start with kind of those easy to digest carbohydrates first most women are not getting enough fiber and. Either their calories are too low or they're wildly inconsistent. So maybe they'll be like, oh I eat healthy all week long. And then they just go nuts on the weekends. And a lot of times that is because they are under consuming they're limiting their restricting to such a degree that it's almost they look at the weekends, like the, their cheat days.

[00:08:41] So it it's just a, an odd mix. And. A lot of times it's because maybe women we tend to not have as good of a relationship with food. Like I said, and it tends to come from, how we were raised and how food was discussed, and how our bodies were discussed.

[00:08:56] And and I'm not saying anything about our parents, they, when we were [00:09:00] younger, they didn't realize you know what that does to our, little female psyche when, when we're told we're a little chunky or that, girls need to look a certain way or that we shouldn't eat this, or that we need to work off the calories, that we had, or the cookies we ate, or the pizza we ate, or something like that.

[00:09:19] But what we need to understand about the macronutrients balance, that first m, is that every woman's needs are different. So your macronutrient needs are gonna depend on your age, your height, your weight, how active you are, what are your goals. Like I was saying, maybe your goals are gaining weight or gaining muscle.

[00:09:38] In that case, we need a calorie surplus. Maybe you have high stress, maybe you don't sleep well. So that's why, coming up here we are in the runway for my fit after 50 plus program, which is gonna start February 23rd. And what that is my, my signature eight week. Nutrition and strength [00:10:00] program, and it's covers basically all of these five m's we walk through this system, but it, that's why with this, I start every single woman out with a personalized macronutrient assessment just because that way they don't have to be guessing at how much protein should I be getting?

[00:10:15] Or what is the best, amount of, fat or carbohydrates for me, right? So because a one size plan doesn't fit all. So if you ever, like I have a woman say I was told that all women need a hundred grams of protein, right? That's not necessarily the case. It could be very different from other women.

[00:10:32] If you have a woman who is. Six feet tall and she's an athlete and she wants to gain more muscle, she might need closer to 150, 180 grams of protein, maybe even more. So if you have a friend who says this is what I heard, that you need to do it, it could vary, right? And the problem is that under fueling, not eating enough calories in midlife, it doesn't necessarily lead to fat loss.

[00:10:57] Especially when it's not combined with that strength [00:11:00] training, right? It can lead to fatigue. It can make our cravings even worse. It can make if we're putting in the time to do the strength training and exercise, it can make us look like we're not having, we're not seeing any results.

[00:11:10] We're not getting, we're not seeing progress from that because. We're not fueling our body properly. And that can really lead to a lot of frustration 'cause you're putting all this time and energy in and you're, you're not getting the benefits from it. So the macros aren't about control, they're just about making sure that we're giving our body what it needs.

[00:11:28] And and it can really I'm super excited to jump into that in my next Max Masterclass with the Strong Start Program. Just talk about, how, you know that undereating or under fueling a lot of times can knock us off course. So the second m in my five M system, it's meal planning.

[00:11:46] And this isn't about, making your beautiful Pinterest recipes or cooking seven nights a week. It's just, it's about reducing mental load. Because most women don't [00:12:00] struggle 'cause they don't know what's healthy. They struggle because, they're making dozens of food decisions every single day.

[00:12:06] Especially if you have kids, you're making their lunches or you're thinking about, oh, I gotta make dinner so that I, you can feed the family or whatever. When you're tired at the end of the day. And overwhelmed and you just don't feel like dealing with it. Decision fatigue always wins, right?

[00:12:22] And that's where, you're ordering in or you're, going out to a restaurant or you're, having a bowl of popcorn for your dinner or a bowl of cereal or some toast or something like that. Something just quick and easy. That may not always be the best choice. So meal planning. Is just about creating that structure and forethought so that food stops feeling like such a chore.

[00:12:47] So it you just, you're just making it easier. Not to mention, when we actually think about what we're going to eat in advance, we can make sure we're hitting those macro goals. We make sure we're getting in enough [00:13:00] protein and we're balancing our meals throughout the day as compared to, yeah, having a, a tiny little breakfast and a giant lunch and then, like I said, eating a bowl of popcorn for dinner. You can actually think it through and make sure that you have stuff in the house to make right. Make sure you're hitting the grocery store and you're, it, so it's not a matter of, you need to spend all day Sunday afternoon.

[00:13:23] Making every single meal and snack that you're gonna be eating for the week. It's just a matter of, maybe you do some, a little prep work, maybe you do some chopping, maybe you hit the store so you can make sure that you have the ingredients. In order to make some meals during the week, and then, maybe you write down, the plan.

[00:13:38] Okay, on Monday night we're gonna have tacos and Tuesday night we're gonna have chili or something like that. So you're just actually thinking about it, making sure you have the food and kind of the plan so that, maybe if your hubby gets home from work earlier than you, he can start the process.

[00:13:56] So it's just creating some structure and some [00:14:00] frameworks and flexibility, right? And that's going to, consistency is gonna beat that beautiful recipe. Creativity every time, so even if it's just a matter of you're eating the same meal every night, at least you have the ingredients for it, and it's a plan.

[00:14:18] So the third M is movement, and that's a big m and that's not just weightlifting, it's not just strength training. I know I talk about that a lot, but that's just one piece. You can be you could be lifting weights for 60 minutes four days a week and not see progress because you know you're sitting at a desk.

[00:14:42] In a sedentary position all week long and not doing any other movement. So creating if your goal is fat loss and you're trying to create that deficit, the strength training piece, that's gonna help with metabolism, that's gonna help your body just to burn more calories at [00:15:00] rest for the long term.

[00:15:01] But we also need to talk about, how are we gonna get in some cardio movement? How are we gonna work on that? That cardiovascular endurance, which is very important for our heart health. There's also another component called neat, it's NEAT, and that's non-exercise activity thermogenesis. So that just means the calories that you're burning from doing other movement other than exercise.

[00:15:24] And that's important. That's when you're, at the end of the day you're like, oh, I got in. 10,000 steps or whatever, or I got in 1000 steps 'cause I didn't move all day today. So that can just be, taking the stairs a few more times or going for a short little walk down the hallway or something just to move your body and try to get in a few more steps during the day.

[00:15:42] But most women I work with are either doing way too much or only cardio. That's a common one. 'cause that's easy. I know before I started working out and strength training in my forties, that was my favorite. I love to go outside and go for a walk. Who doesn't? [00:16:00] That's amazing.

[00:16:00] And it's so beneficial for our mental health too, but like walking or going to the gym and getting on the treadmill or the elliptical or the bike for 45 minutes and then stretching and leaving, that was my workout. Because it was easy. I could sit and watch TV and stuff. The strength training, that was the hard part.

[00:16:18] And, and I never had a plan, I would just go to the gym and jump from machine to machine thinking, oh, yep, I strength trained. There was no plan to it. I wasn't like, oh, is this upper body, lower body? What muscles am I am I using, right? But it's just so common for women because that is the that's what we know, it's what we're comfortable with.

[00:16:39] And not to mention, we're so busy in life that many women are just like, I don't have enough time to, to exercise. By the end of the day, I'm tired. I'm too tired in the morning to get up, earlier to work out. Or they're intimidated by the gym. We're afraid of getting hurt.

[00:16:56] They don't really know what to do. They're afraid, when they hear lift [00:17:00] heavy, they're thinking, oh no, I have this back injury and I gotta be careful. I shouldn't lift because I might hurt it. So common, all these things are really common and, but strength training, I talked about this in the masterclass is just, it's not optional for women in midlife.

[00:17:14] It's not optional. It is a must. Because muscle is gonna help us. Some things that happen with menopause is we are gonna see that our metabolism starts to slow. We're gonna see that we start to lose muscle and we lose strength and stability and balance. And we start to see, we have a decrease in bone density.

[00:17:33] Muscle supports all these things. It's gonna help to keep our metabolism up. It's gonna help us to balance those blood sugars because we know that we become less sensitive to insulin. As what after we hit menopause muscle's gonna support our joint health. So when we do have those injuries in that pain, it's all the more important that we are building the muscle around those joints to help to support them.

[00:17:56] And often this will help decrease risk of injury and [00:18:00] decrease risk of, or decreased pain as well. Not to mention the movement piece. I've worked with so many women, one-on-one personal training, and there is just something really cool about seeing a woman gain confidence in her body and her strength, and her ability, just her capability.

[00:18:22] It has nothing to do with oh, you lost, five inches around your waist. No, it's about damn, I, I just lift, bicep, curled 20 pounds or whatever, right? It's not about, crushing yourself. It's just about gradually building strength in a way that it respects your body and your recovery, but helps to build that confidence.

[00:18:42] And that's why, strength can be, or strength training can be addictive because you start to see the progress and the results and you're like, yes, I like this. And I wanna do it more, and I wanna keep going. So the fourth M in my five M system is mindfulness, [00:19:00] and this one gets underestimated all the time.

[00:19:03] And my, because people hear mindfulness and they're like, oh, it's meditation and yoga, and it's doing the woo or the foo type things. And that's absolutely not what it is. Mindfulness can be how you're listening to your body. It can be, being mindful around food and nutrition can just be about listening to your body when it's actually had enough and not pushing yourself to the point of eating until you wanna vomit.

[00:19:28] Which, so often we're running around and doing a million different tasks while we're eating. We're eating in the car, we're eating, standing up in the kitchen over the sink or whatever. And we are multitasking. We're doing a million different things. We're not thinking about the food that we're eating, how it tastes how hungry we are when we start.

[00:19:45] At what point we feel, comfortably full, right? This is a hard one for people. We've got really gotten away from this, but mindfulness also includes sleep. How are you sleeping? I can't even tell you how many times people are [00:20:00] like, I'm doing everything right, but I don't understand why I continue to gain weight.

[00:20:03] And I work with a lot of, after working at the hospital and I'm still actually associated with the hospital and work with one of the hospitals in a program called lifestyle Redesign. And it's a program where I'm just. I'm one part of, I think four people that are meeting with the employees of this hospital.

[00:20:20] And talking to them about my part is the nutrition coaching piece, and kinda tell you how often I'm talking to like nurses and doctors that do, that do shift work. So they're up all night long. And boy, when you mess with that circadian rhythm, even if you're like, I work all night and then I come home and I, I'm going to sleep in a darkened room and everything's quiet and I wear earplugs and blah, blah, blah, their body's still messed up.

[00:20:46] It's still really hard when it is light outside for your body to actually sleep and get into that full REM sleep, right? So sleep is huge. Next is stress. Stress is another one of those. You're doing [00:21:00] everything else but you have high stress levels. That's gonna increase that cortisol.

[00:21:03] We're gonna see more weight gain around our mid. Section. And we know that with menopause we already are seeing an increase in cortisol. We're already seeing that we are starting to gain fat in areas that we never used to. And a lot of it's like around our midsection and around areas that actually can increase our risk for a lot of chronic illnesses.

[00:21:24] And then the last thing, mindfulness is about how you talk to yourself. If you're constantly like you're worthless, you know you're fat, you are lazy, you, or if you have other people, saying that in your ear and making you feel it and believe it. That is huge. Huge. They've seen, they've done a lot of research where it's even if you don't.

[00:21:47] Believe something, but you say it out loud so say you're like, you are beautiful, you are smart, you are kind, blah, blah, blah. Even if you feel like, I'm just saying this and it seems really silly, it's actually shown that it [00:22:00] actually can increase your, dopamine or your neurotransmitters and make you feel actually happier.

[00:22:07] So when it comes to mindfulness, if you're constantly rushed, if you're eating distracted, if you're sleeping poorly, if you're living in that fight or flight, right? With high cortisol levels, your body is never going to feel safe. And when your body doesn't feel safe, it's progress is gonna feel impossible.

[00:22:24] So mindfulness just helps us to regulate our nervous system, and that's truly where. Healing can really start. So if you don't have that mindfulness piece, but if you have everything else, you'll see the other pieces crumbling. The last piece to our five piece puzzle is moderation, and this is where you know that all or nothing thinking shows up.

[00:22:46] I was good all week, I fell off the wagon. I'll start over on Monday. Moderation. Is what we all need to be living in. And it's the idea of that long term sustainable. This is the [00:23:00] way I live, so therefore if I have some Oreos, it's not the end of the day, it's not cheating, it is not, there should not be guilt and shame around it.

[00:23:11] If I go on vacation and I don't get a workout like I normally do, that all is not lost. If I, have a cocktail or eat some chips or something like that, if you have something that knocks you off course to a degree, that is not the end of the world, you are able, moderation is about you being able to move on from that and just go back to what is your norm, your long term, your plan of this is how I live for my long-term health.

[00:23:41] And that in, in Includes, the regular strength training, even if you have a week where you don't get it, you get back on track, right? So this is about structure without rigidity. It's about flexibility without chaos, and it's about confidence without [00:24:00] guilt. And this is where women feel the biggest sense of relief, I think of realizing this isn't a diet, this isn't a short term.

[00:24:09] So here's the big takeaway. You don't need more discipline and you don't need another reset, and you don't need to try harder. You just need structure. You need a system. And this is exactly what we work on inside the Fit After 50 plus program. Like I was saying, the program, the next eight week program for Menopausal Women starts February 23rd.

[00:24:31] And I'm gonna talk a little bit more about it in next week's podcast. And it's not about dying, it's not about extremes or quick fixes, it's just, it's about using that five M system, all of those different pieces to create a sustainable, long-term system that holds all the puzzle pieces together.

[00:24:51] Make sense? If you ask yourself, which of these ums feels hardest right now? Think about that. [00:25:00] Write 'em down. Which one do you need to maybe work on a little bit harder than the other one? And I would love to hear from you. Send me a message and let me know which M is hardest for you.

[00:25:11] If you feel like there is a friend that you have that might benefit from hearing this message, please share this episode and stay tuned because we're gonna keep building on this. I'll talk a little bit more about my master classes that I am teaching here this next week. And. Just remember, this is about progress over perfection.

[00:25:30] We're in this for the long haul and this is your season of strength. Have an amazing day.