Mom Bomb, with Nicole
Mom Bomb
Reclaim Motherhood. Leave the world better than you found it.
Motherhood is not small work.
It is civilization-shaping work.
In a world addicted to outrage, distraction, and division, the most radical thing a woman can do is come home to herself — and raise children from that place.
Mom Bomb is where science meets soul.
Where nervous system regulation meets spiritual alignment.
Where we stop parenting from anxiety and start parenting from clarity.
This podcast is for mothers who understand that they are their child’s first and most influential teacher — not just of behavior, but of emotional regulation, integrity, empathy, and truth.
We talk about:
• breaking generational patterns
• raising soul-aligned kids
• regulating yourself before correcting your child
• the neuroscience behind anxiety and overfunctioning
• modeling compassion in a divided world
• and building change from the inside out
This is not about perfection.
It’s about awareness.
It’s about alignment.
It’s about reclaiming the quiet, grounded power of motherhood.
Because the world does not change from the top down.
It changes from the living room out.
If you’re ready to stop reacting and start leading your home with intention, this is your place.
Welcome to Mom Bomb.
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🔥 Join the rebellion, reclaim your wholeness, and let’s burn the system down—not ourselves.
Mom Bomb, with Nicole
Why Schools Dodge Discipline: Funding, ADA, And OCR Explained
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What if the classroom chaos you’re managing isn’t a “behavior problem” or a “teacher problem,” but a money problem wearing a restorative justice mask? We pull back the curtain on how per-pupil funding, enrollment counts, average daily attendance, and civil rights compliance quietly steer discipline decisions—and why suspensions vanish even as disruptions spike.
We break down the funding formula in plain English: a base dollar amount per student plus added weights for English learners, special education, poverty, grade level, and district type. Then we connect the dots to ADA, where each missed day becomes lost revenue, turning every removal into a budget decision. Add the pressure of disproportionality flags and potential OCR investigations, and you get a system that avoids formal discipline, reroutes students through informal pathways, and sends them back to class to keep the numbers clean.
Along the way, we name the human cost the dashboards can’t see: teachers absorbing escalations, planning time evaporating, classmates losing hours of instruction, and communities mistaking lower suspension stats for genuine safety. We talk about why ISS often doesn’t happen—counted as a removal, under staffed, and expensive—and how Title I grants create the illusion of resources while tying services to narrow rules. We also dive into trauma and chronic stress, explaining how they reshape regulation and make de-escalation harder without real support, not just slogans.
This conversation is a map: follow the incentives and you’ll understand the decisions. If you’ve been told to just “de-escalate” and “be compassionate” while your room burns, you’re not imagining the mismatch between language and reality. Ready to rethink the design? Press play, share this with a teacher bestie, and help us push for policies that fund real support, protect learning time, and stop treating teachers as shock absorbers. If this hit your soul or your sarcasm gland, subscribe, leave a review, and come hang out on Instagram at the burned out bee—let’s keep the real talk going.
Thanks for listening!
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I'd love for you to message me what you thought, what it made you think about, your reflections, and of course what’s been coming up for your or causing you anxiety lately. I will never share your name or info unless you say it’s okay!
Welcome to the Burned Out Bean, dear teachers, the podcast for educators who are two seconds away from flipping a desk but still somehow remember to take attendance. Or maybe you didn't. I'm Nicole, the Burned Out Bean, who's a former classroom teacher, curriculum builder, interrupter of bullshit, and professional wearer of the I'm fine mask. Around here, we say the quiet parts out loud. We call out the systems that run on guilt, glitter, and unpaid labor. And we absolutely do not accept toxic positivity as a wellness plan. Grab your lukewarm coffee, lock your classroom door, and take a breath. You're home. Is that we talk about kids these days, classroom management, and restorative justice. But we almost never talk about the actual engine running underneath all of it. It's gotta be no child left behind, right? Literacy for all. In the name of learning. No. No, we're not stupid. But here's something that, you know, my husband used to tell me that I thought was a little bit jaded. It's truly not. And the saying goes like this follow a man's money and it will lead you to his heart. Well, here's the real engine running underneath all of it. It's money. We get that money, and by we, I mean schools, not us, schools, through compliance, through funding formulas, and through data points that administrators are absolutely terrified of. And who's getting all of the blowback? You are. Like, don't we just have a certain number of enrolled students and that's it? Well, no. And actually, not all students are created equal as far as their funding is concerned. I'm gonna really quickly break down cash per student. And this is typically what's coming from state funding, not local. And it makes up about 50% overall, depending on the district, makes up about 50% of the overall school's funding. Okay, so state funding has this, it's called a per pupil formula, and it's the core funding that is most impacted by you know these more bureaucratic metrics. So every state has a formula, it's called the school funding formula, and you can look it up for your state. So I'm gonna give you a general idea, and it starts with a base amount per student. Okay, so everything else aside, each student is worth a certain amount of money to the school that they attend. That could be anywhere between$7,500 and$14,000, just depending on what state you're in. Then the state adjusts that money based on enrollment. How many total bodies do you have? Attendance, we call this ADA, average daily attendance. The student needs, whether they're ELL, SPED, they have high trauma, they're in high poverty, what type of a district, urban versus rural, their grade level, so elementary versus high school, they have different weights. And each of these weights is going to add funding, like adding toppings on your base pizza. So, like we're at mod now, and I'm terrible at mod because I revert into like my whole fat kid self, and I just want one of literally everything on my pizza. It's inedible by the time that I've done, I've had to stop going. So, for example, our little student pizza here, our base funding for student, let's assume$10,000. Okay, just right in the middle of that$75 to$1,400 range or$14,000 range. An ELL, so English language learner multiplier would be somewhere in the neighborhood of$1,200. Special ed multiplier,$5,000, low income multiplier,$800, high school multiplier,$450. So a high need student could bring in$17,000, while a general education student might bring in$10,000. And where do most of our behavioral issues come from? It's not any secret when I say it's usually our higher need students. So enrollment determines your district's foundational budget. If we lose 100 students, we could be losing hundreds of thousands of dollars. We gain a hundred students, windfall. And so this is why districts panic about charter schools, homeschooling, vouchers or ESA programs, boundary changes, and population declines. Our enrollment determines staffing allocations, class sizes, whether programs get to stay or whether they get cut, whether a school even stays open. This is life or death to our administrators. Let's move on to ADA. Again, that's the average daily attendance. This one affects real-time money in many states. So even if 1,000 kids are enrolled, if only 880 attend regularly, the district may be funded as if they only have 880 students. This is why we hear attendance matters. Please make sure your child is in class. This is why we have truancy crackdowns. This is why literally administrators will drive themselves to students' houses and pick them up and bring them to school. I know that I'm not the only person that has seen that go on. This is why schools are begging parents not to take vacations during the school year. And I'm here saying, take your kids to Disneyland. Do it when it's cheaper during the year because you're a teacher for crying out loud. So ADA creates a massive volatility for schools that serve sick students, students with unstable housing, students who are dealing with trauma, students who have transportation issues, the most vulnerable kids are also the least predictable funding. Now I know that this is not the entire reason that you're here. You want to know why we're not suspending kids. Well, let's talk about the discipline data. I thought you would never ask. So believe it or not, this discipline affects our funding in two major ways. The first one is suspensions and expulsions. This is lost ADA. We understand that now. If a student is removed from class or off campus, that student isn't attending and the school loses their daily funding. The second major way might be even scarier. It's civil rights compliance. Did you get like a full body, like, oh, full body shiver there? Because I did. The Office of Civil Rights, OCR for short, they monitor over suspension of students of color, sped discipline violations, and restraint and seclusions. Districts with disproportionality issues, they have to either spend local money to fix it. That's a different bag. It's a different bag than our federal money. Or they will lose their federal money. Government's coming in hot, huh? A little over their skis for someone who's not even in the classroom. So let's talk a little bit more about the weights, right? Because the more high needs your population, the more money the district should receive. The extra funding actually rarely covers the cost of services, but like it's better to have it than to not, right? Right? It's better than a punch in the face. Students who are more expensive are our SPED education students, those who are in poverty, experiencing homelessness, English language learners, or those who have out-of-area placements, who don't just have a bus that already comes to their neighborhood. There's also categorical grants for these are just like pots of money. And schools apply for these grants. They apply for STEM, for having CTE programs, for arts, for mental health, for behavioral intervention, for literacy, and for college and career readiness. And so if you're at a Title I school, they probably have literally every single one of these things. Do they function very well? I don't know. Like, are they doing it for the good of the students or for the money? They might be crazy understaffed. They might not receive all of the training that they actually need. These funds have to be spent in very narrow ways, which creates the illusion of lots of money when in reality their teachers still can't get their basic supplies. So if a kid is off campus, the school loses attendance dollars for every single day. Now I know what you're thinking is, well, what about ISI? Like, why won't we just put them in ISI? Like they don't have to keep disrupting my classroom and stopping the learning of 28 other students. Because if a kid isn't physically in the building, even if they're stapling worksheets in a closet, like the school does keep the money, right? Well, that brings us to our next part. Why does admin also avoid ISS? Because you think that that would be the compromise. But actually, there's a couple of reasons why we don't just put students in ISS. Number one, a lot of Title I schools don't have the staff to run it. They don't have enough paras. They don't have the behavior specialists, they have, you know, no counselor half of the time, the psychologist to share it among six buildings. So ISS is kind of like the shell game where we're trying to find somebody to put there, and someone ends up losing supervision in another area that's important. But there's bigger reasons than that. My school had somebody to sit in there. So why didn't my school put kids in ISI? Well, it's because that ISI still counts as a removal in the discipline data. They get you coming and going. So here's this perfect storm part one. We can keep them in the school and keep them in the funding, even if they cuss out the teacher, even if they flip the desks, even if they're threatening peers, even if they're unsafe, even if the entire freaking class is losing instruction. Administrators will try literally everything to avoid ISS. They'll avoid, they'll do everything to avoid out of school suspension. We'll have a buddy teacher. Have you ever been somebody's safe adult? Yeah, that's it. Take a walk, have a restorative chat, cool down space, like just oh, can we just sit in the counselor's office for this, you know, for this class today? And then there's all those endless parent calls. Why is this? It's because too many ISI placements look like disproportionate discipline. And if you hit that threshold of disproportionate discipline or the definition of, well, then you have the Office of Civil Rights, you have investigations, you have corrective action plans, you have monitoring, you have funding risks, you have to do actual work. It's not just swimming along anymore. Oh my God, we're gonna have to make something better. Administrators do not want that. So they send the kid back to class. We call it restorative justice, and we avoid creating a paper trail. Perfect Storm Part two, Title I and poor communities get punished for trauma behaviors. So what's going on here? And we all know this, even probably if we haven't worked at a Title I school. Students in poverty are overexposed to community violence. They're living with food insecurity, they're oftentimes supporting or babysitting their siblings, they're experiencing housing instability, they're managing untreated mental health systems, they're living with inconsistent support, they're experiencing chronic stress. Chronic stress changes the brain, especially the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex. And y'all, the prefrontal cortex is so important. All of our reasoning goes there. These kids react faster, they have lower thresholds, they have weaker emotional regulation, they're more likely to escalate, they're harder to de-escalate. Schools can't respond without a school suspension because they can't lose ADA money. They get flagged by civil rights for disproportionate discipline. They lose Title I funds. They'd have to provide SPED services in a different way. So the school almost always does nothing. Perfect Storm Part Three. You ready? Administrators are fucking terrified of discipline data. Every school gets a report card. Suspensions, especially out-of-school suspension, directly impacts their state ratings, their federal compliance, their grants, their Title I funding renewal, their district or public perception, whether the admin keeps their job, hot lists for intervention, and we're right back at the OCR, the Office of Civil Rights Investigations. So more suspensions make you look like you're a failing school. This is a case of the scoreboard, doesn't always show the story of the game. Look, we can say whatever words that we want, it doesn't make them true. Oh, but the data says, oh, the data is bullshit. We know what's going on in our classrooms. It's fucking insane. This is why administrators say things like just de-escalate. Oh, that wasn't his intent. It's not that big of a deal. I don't want to ruin their life over one mistake. Let's be compassionate. We have to reduce our suspension numbers. Teachers hear that this is all about compassion. Administrators know this is all about metrics. Discipline disproportionately kills federal funding. So naturally, what do we do? Not discipline. We put that shit right under the rug. Sweep, sweep. So here's where it gets dark. I know, like it wasn't already. Yeah, here's where it gets dark. Because you might think, right? Like I've heard this argument a thousand times. Well, if one student is destroying the learning of 28 others, don't those students have rights? Can't we use OCR to protect them? Well, legally, yeah. Every child has the right to learn in a safe environment. But in practice, districts will do anything to avoid triggering an OCR investigation. Listen to my words. Districts will do anything to avoid triggering an OCR investigation. Even if it means sacrificing the majority for the one. Because here is the district's internal equation. Removing that disruptive student, that's a risk. Keeping them in class, though, that's just an inconvenience for teachers. And guess which one is cheaper? Schools don't avoid discipline because they're restorative. They avoid discipline because suspensions suspensions lower attendance and that leads to funding loss. ISS requires staffing. That leads to money loss. Patterns of suspension lead to disproportionality flags. Disproportionality flags lead to civil rights investigations. Civil rights investigations lead to massive costs and public shame. Bad discipline data leads to lower state ratings, leads to lower enrollment, leads to even more lost funding. Do we see how this is all about the money now? Teachers are absorbing unchecked behavior. They're doing the emotional labor of the deal escalation. They're losing their planning time, taking verbal abuse, being expected to build relationships as a substitute for boundaries. They're being told to reflect on their part in the conflict. And oh, believe you me, we have a big conversation to have about that next week. And all the while, the funding system guarantees that unsafe behavior is normalized, that classrooms become unpredictable, that teachers develop anxiety, dread, and hypervigilance. That burnout skyrockets. You want to know why they're not worried about you? How many years have you been there? You could get fully burned out and have to go reevaluate your life, and there will always be a younger, cheaper cog to put in your place. Behavior rises, funding becomes more fragile. It's a cycle that literally cannot be won inside the current system. So the message becomes keep the kid in class. Let the teacher absorb it. She could figure it out. She's so good with them. Let the other kids adapt. The world isn't perfect. They're gonna have you know unruly people around them in life. Do not suspend unless you want the entire district on fire. I want to say this so plainly. An admin won't say this out loud, but this is the calculation happening behind every don't suspend him conversation. A class of 29 kids is losing learning time. Well, that costs nothing. A teacher's stress, panic, and burnout costs nothing. A misbehaving student missing class that costs$88. A discipline pattern that costs reputation, that costs compliance metrics, an OCR investigation. Well, that costs federal money and political capital. So, yes, the disruptive students' rights get protected more aggressively. Not because they matter more, but because they present a legal and financial risk. The well-behaved majority, the ones trying to do their best, the ones who are afraid, the ones losing hundreds of hours of learning every year. The girl that cried in my arms after there was a gang fight in our room. Her suffering doesn't show up on the spreadsheet. And if it doesn't show up on a spreadsheet, the system doesn't care. I don't give a fuck. You're not imagining it, you're not overreacting. You're not needing better classroom management. You are living inside a system where, and this is not your imagination, discipline is discouraged, behavior is tolerated, teachers are shock absorbers, students with trauma are unsupported, classmates lose learning time daily. Safety is optional, and metrics matter more than humans. And isn't that the biggest? Like, what the fuck? This whole thing is supposed to be about humans. And you're not crazy for feeling betrayed because it is a betrayal. It's a betrayal of trust, it's a betrayal of professionalism, it's a betrayal of the kids who deserve better. And the more teachers understand about the funding behind the discipline crisis, the more clearly we can name what's happening. This is not a classroom problem. This is a structural, financial, and political problem. And we are done pretending otherwise. Till next time, peace. Whoo! If this episode dragged any skeletons out of your filing cabinet, just now. Same. Thanks for listening to the burned out bee, dear teachers. If it hit you in the soul or in the sarcasm gland, send it to your teacher bestie. You know the one. Follow the show, smash that subscribe button like it's a broken coffee machine. And come hang out on Instagram at the burned out bee, where the real talk continues. And remember, you weren't meant to be a martyr with a lanyard. You were meant to rise. See you next time, Pete.