Kitchen-Table Revolution For Raising Aligned Kids

What if the clearest parenting answers aren’t in a method but already living in you. We pull back the curtain on soul-aligned parenting and make a bold claim: real change starts at the kitchen table, not from the top down. Through a candid client story and decades of experience with families across the spectrum, we map how generational patterns quietly shape our choices and why tackling “symptoms” like screens or sleep without touching the root keeps us stuck.

We walk through the fear of choosing differently than our parents—will honesty feel like disloyalty—and offer a compassionate reframe: evolution honors our lineage. You’ll hear why healing yourself is the most practical strategy you can use, how nervous system regulation becomes the delivery system for co-regulation, and what it looks like to parent from your higher self with clarity, empathy, and steady boundaries. No playbook for every scenario, but a way of being that makes decisions feel grounded instead of wobbly.

We define soul-led parenting beyond any single faith tradition, focusing on connection, agency, and purpose. Expect real-world examples—from “depression pancakes” to modern tech overwhelm—that show how scarcity and fear echo across generations, and how to keep the love while releasing the residue. We also share the Soul Shine Moms path: a 12-week, community-powered container designed to help you break cycles, raise the light, and build a bond your teen may eye-roll through today but live by tomorrow. Subscribe, share this with a mom who’s ready to lead from within, and leave a review telling us the one pattern you’re rewriting next.

Thanks for listening! 

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I'd love for you to message me what you thought, what it made you think about, your reflections, and of course what’s been coming up for your or causing you anxiety lately. I will never share your name or info unless you say it’s okay!

Transcript

Tempo: 120.0

SPEAKER_01 0:47

Let's do this consciously. Welcome back. I'm Nicole, your host, and we're talking about soul-aligned parenting. We're talking about energy. We're talking about living our most aligned lives and raising up our most aligned children. Because when we look around the world, we have plenty of complaints. Who's going to fix it? Truly changing the world, making it a more beautiful, a more just, a more grounded and aligned place. That comes down to the mothers. It's not coming from the top down. Hear me out. It's not coming from the top down. It's not coming from misguided, ungrounded, unaligned adults. To truly change things for future generations, we start with us. We start with what we can control. And we help our children to develop these skills so that we can raise a healed children. Children who are focused on higher order problems, then their anxiety, their lack, their scarcity, who then go on to raise healed children so that they can tackle higher order problems, so that our world can progress and evolve into a more beautiful, more just place to live. This is how we leave our world better than we found it. Now, I was with a client last week when something just clicked so far into place that I had to share it with you. It became so, so clear. Most of the women that I work with are moms, and we tend to wrestle with, you know, mostly the same types of questioning ourselves. Now, she was specifically questioning how she should handle a situation with her middle school-aged daughter. And I don't know one of us who hasn't been there, unless your kids are just not in middle school yet. So it's coming, and you currently have your own set of variables with whatever age and stage that your child is currently in. Whatever age our child is, we wonder what's okay for our kids in this ever-changing world. And our world is, it is ever-changing. The technology that they are currently growing up with, like, we didn't even know about it. It wasn't even in our imaginations for the most part. Like some of us had to still get up and change the channel on the TV. Some of us also maybe accidentally recorded over our Carpenter Sisters cassette tape because you know how the cassette recorders, the record button is right next to the play button. And sometimes you get a little fat-fingered right there, and you could hit both at the same time, and then accidentally record over the Carpenter Sisters with the radio. And yeah, that was me. And it wasn't even good radio. Like I think it was a lot of commercials. So that was a really tough day. So we sit here and we wonder am I making the right choices for my kid? Am I going to damage them irreparably? Am I going to have to pay like how much in therapy in their 20s? Here we've been put in charge of this little soul, this little human that we've got to keep alive and ideally form them into people who can be successful in this ever-changing world because it's not going to stop. This is no small task. It's daunting at best. And so it's easy to question ourselves when we see what everyone else is doing, what everyone else is not doing, what their opinions are, the different parenting programs, chore charts, sticker charts, discipline, gentle parenting, free-range parenting. It's all overwhelming. And then if you're in a split or a blighted family, fully forget about it because there's a whole new set of variables to navigate between people who already didn't see eye to eye to begin with. And I see that a lot with parents of teenagers. That's a different episode. Now, with so many options, how do we know what's actually right? Like, how do we know and feel secure in that knowing? Feel good in that knowing. As wonderful and as easy as it would be to just give you a parenting playbook, like open to the page of, you know, my kids said that they were going to work, but instead they went and hung out with their friends. What do I do? Well, I can't do that for you. I could tell you how I handled that, but I'm not going to. Because the answer isn't in what anybody else has ever done. The answer is in you. You already have all of the answers. I am here to help you unlock them. Now, it's not just as simple as sitting and thinking, like, what should I do here? Or which parenting trend seems right for my child or their temperament? The real answer, the real truth is in healing you. And if I just heard a collective groan from everyone who is listening to this at this moment, right now, too, because this is work and generally humans like we feel incredibly resistant to things that don't come to us with ease. And hmm, that's work. So you're not wrong to feel that way. I felt that way too. 100% I felt that way. Now, that said, if you truly want to raise soul-aligned, happy people for whom success in life is inevitable, you've got to work on you first. Why? Well, it does feel safer to do something that's agreed upon, something that's socially acceptable, something that's on trend. It's just that it's a trend. They come and they go. Or do you want to feel so deeply soul aligned in raising your children that you are unshakable as a parent? Do you want to feel grounded, to feel settled in your decisions rather than constantly questioning yourself? Because your child is not a trend. Your relationship with your child is not a trend. And there is a way to mother your children and feel secure in all of your decision making. There is a way to mother your children and feel totally secure that you are doing the right thing. Here's the trick the right thing is not something that society has approved. The right thing is what comes from in you. It comes from your higher self, your higher mother. It can be done with empathy, with compassion. And yes, it can create children that are so pleasant, that are self-aware, and that follow their soul's path in joy. How does that sound for someone living in your house? Somebody that's pleasant, self-aware, and follows their soul's path and joy. And isn't that what we want for our kids? Better than we have experienced. Oh, did that trigger something? Like if we actively say that we're trying to do better, does that negate the parents that poured their love into us? And here we actually come to the crux of my client's issue. She was questioning if I handled this situation so differently than it would have been handled for me by my parents, I feel as though I'm going to have to explain myself to them. And if I speak the truth that I believe, if I speak my truth that I want to do things differently and that I want to give my daughter a better, more rounded emotional experience. Am I proverbially slapping my mother in the face? Will she be offended? Maybe. But that's not your business, and it's also not your responsibility. So that's one of the first hurdles that we work through. You are not responsible for the emotions or the emotional reactions of others. You are responsible for your reactions. You are responsible for your truth and standing in it. So what about our parents then and our grandparents and their grandparents? Well, they were doing the best they could with the information and the tools that they had available to them. And they had their own traumas and they had the traumas of their ancestors to contend with. And I'm willing to bet that if you're listening to this right now, you are probably only two or three generations removed from ancestors who lived through the Great Depression, which may actually be the cleanest example of how generational trauma carries through subsequent generations. It's like this. My Nana grew up in the Great Depression. She was the only person from her family to graduate high school, like the first and only. And she didn't actually make it there that many days because she had to stay home and help her mom take in the washing so that, you know, they could eat. Nana brought that into her adulthood. She was known for being very frugal. So, you know, the crusties pancake batter. Well, not the batter, it's actually dry. So you put that powder into the bowl and then you add water, you mix it up. Well, my Nana didn't use the instructions. She put a little bit of the powder into the bowl and then she added a lot of water, and she did this to stretch the batter, to make that powder last longer before they would have to buy more. It didn't matter that it wasn't the Great Depression anymore. It didn't matter that there wasn't food scarcity that she was experiencing, that there wasn't lack that she was experiencing. That was something that she carried with her. It was a part of her core. It was something that she did. Now, we all loved those pancakes. We called them depression pancakes in jest. And we love them because they're very thin, like a crepe. It's actually like a delicacy in my house now. So we haven't brought the trauma, just the depression pancakes, forward to our generation. All in all, it's not a shock that they were careful with money. And it's not a shock that that trickled down. Their daughter, my mom, grew up with this rhetoric of, well, we don't buy it if it's not on sale. Which many would agree with. It sounds very, very sensible. Who doesn't like a sale? Girl math. It's actually also dude math whenever it's about a TV. I experienced that one recently. So if you grew up with this kind of rhetoric being spoken about shopping, then you probably also experience a little ping of guilt when you purchase something for yourself, or even if you purchase something for the family, but it wasn't a need. You probably are also able to talk yourself out of that little ping of guilt fairly easily. It's a small example, but it's one that shows the way that our ancestors lived trauma informs ours. What else do we carry? Ideas about discipline, sleep, schooling, screen time, social media. And we all carry our own stories about what we would do differently. What we would never say to our children. And then we hear those words fly right out of our mouths, usually when we're low on patience or we haven't gotten very much sleep because mom life, or we have other chaos or other stressors going on in life because who doesn't? And truly, these things we're talking about, the bedtime, the schooling, the sleep, the discipline, the social media, when we have problems with those, those are symptoms. They're not root problems. They are symptoms. They are all signs, they're all data to follow when we're addressing the symptoms. So if we address that symptom, like screen time, that symptom may get better. Your child might start to regulate their screen time, but it also may manifest in a new and inventive way. Kids are great at that. We've got to address the root. And the root is your child's soul experience. So, how do we function as the best mom that we can be? Being responsible for this little person with their little fingers and their little toes and help them grow into an aligned, centered human with the skills to thrive in our changing world. It's down to you, mama. It is down to you. You show them the way. You are your child's first and most impactful teacher, which is actually why I work with moms and not their kids. You were picked for this. Your child chose you, and you have the opportunity now to rise to the occasion. Or you could just leave it for the next generation. And if you did default there to, I'll leave it for the next generation. I'm not going to do that work. Well, you probably want a new podcast because we're talking about transformational change here. Because this is for the mamas that are accepting the assignment. This is for the mamas that are accepting the assignment to soul-led parenting, who are more concerned about the welfare of their children's souls than what is going on in the parenting trends and what others are doing in the right now. Let me clarify that when I talk about the welfare of our children's souls, I'm not talking about, you know, this religion versus that religion. You can apply this to literally any religion. I'm talking about how they thrive in life, how connected to themselves and others that they are. Mamas who accept this assignment are looking for something deeper. They're looking for something lasting. They're looking for the kind of relationship with their child that results in a true and lasting bond. Where your children come to you with issues that worry their souls and truly listen to the wisdom that you have to contribute and bring forth. Now that doesn't mean they're not going to do it with an attitude. There will be attitude. They are, you know, these children that turn into teenagers at some point. So the attitude is a given, but they will listen and you will see it. It's just going to come a little bit later. They don't want to show you that they're listening. Mamas who accept this assignment are the same ones whose inner voice is whispering to them that there has to be something more. There has to be a better way. There is. It's you. You have all the wisdom and intelligence of your ancestors, your own lived experience, your soul, yourself. Yourself with a capital S will always, always guide you to what is the greatest good of all. And your soul, open to your child, will build the kind of connection that cannot be severed. So, how do we get there? Well, this is where I've got you. I call it breaking the cycle and raising the light. And what I do is I work with the mama first to heal their relationship with self, to learn to regulate their nervous system, replace the old patterns that don't align with their soul purpose so that they can lead their family with absolute and unshakable confidence and to finally model the exact behaviors they want to see and that they want to integrate into their new connected way of being with their family and in their children's lives. The results are amazing.

SPEAKER_00 19:14

Like it's beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

That's her two-year-old. We're absolutely starting every morning and every day this week with a thankful meditation, and it's giving me more tools to help him with processing his big feelings. Beautiful. We start with you because when you heal yourself, you heal everyone around you. You heal your children, your grandchildren, your great-grandchildren, your mother, your grandmother, your husband. You heal your friends, you heal everyone around you. There is only upside here. And I wanted to get this process into the hands of as many mamas as possible, which is why I created Love You for Mamas. It's kind of a university on connecting with and loving and appreciating yourself and just starting to form that relationship with self, that self with a capital S. Well, after running Love You for Mamas, it started to, as loving creations tend to do, it started to morph into something bigger, something more encapsulating, something more loving and more connective. It evolved into Soul Shine Moms, where I, a mom, a master of education who has worked with thousands and thousands of families covering the spectrum from high trauma to affluent. I've seen thousands of different parenting styles from consistent to inconsistent to permissive and strict, loving to heartbreaking, which has absolutely nothing to do with the affluence of the parents, by the way. I've used all of my breadth of experience. Experience with kids, with parents, with my unique understanding as a scientist of the human body and nervous system, and my background in spiritual psychology with its own therapeutic techniques to access, to learn self. And I've used all of this to bring you the first parenting program of its kind. This is born from a life spent teaching, mentoring, and supporting young people and their families. Soul Shine Moms is where my education, intuition, and lived experience come together, touching and transforming the source of what goes off the rails, not the symptoms. I always say, give me 12 weeks and I will give you the rest of your life in relationship with your child. You can do this, mama. There are so many ways to engage here. The first and most structure, the easiest structure is going to be our 12-week Soul Shine mom's course. And we begin this May. This is your Mother's Day. This is your all-encompassing healing yourself to leading your family all in one, including the community that is raising their mom frequency with you, that is making the changes and doing the reflection with you. Here to support you on your soul shine parenting journey. If you prefer to not be in a group, you are always welcome to come in for one-on-one sessions. However, y'all, the group experience is something else. Connecting with other moms, it's so healing to witness each other, to witness each other's trauma, to witness each other's problems, to witness each other shepherding through, shepherding each other through transformation. Community is such an important part of a newer, kinder, and more beautiful world that we're building with our children. Because again, it is not going to come from the adults. It's not going to become from the misguidance that's already grown up. It's going to come from a new leadership. And that new leadership, that's our kids. It has to come from the ground level. Okay. We have to change humanity from the inside out. And moms, we're where it begins. So stick around, bees. Burned out or not burned out, stick around because we are going to be talking a lot more about this. See you next time, bees. Remember, the world doesn't change from the top down. It changes from your kitchen table out. If this hit, subscribe. If it stirred something, sit with it. And if it challenged you, good. That's how we grow. This has been a bird healthy production. And I will see you next time, Mama B.