EP 46: The JOY of Serving Our Country; Happy 250th America!

Fourth of July isn’t just a day off when your life is tied to the military. It can be a rush of pride, a lump in your throat, and a flash of memories you didn’t ask for all at once. We’re talking about the joy and delight of serving our country and how to celebrate Independence Day with a clear heart, especially as a military spouse, active duty service member, or veteran.

We anchor the conversation in Jeremiah 29:7, seeking the welfare of the place God has sent us, and we connect that to the real work of protecting a nation’s ability to live, worship, and raise families in peace. We also get practical about the awkward moment everyone knows: when someone says, “Thank you for your service.” We share simple ways to receive gratitude without feeding pride, and why it matters to remember that the ability to serve is itself a grace.

From there we go deeper into endurance and sacrifice through John 15:13, and we name two easy ditches to fall into on patriotic holidays: idolizing America or constantly tearing it down. We talk about getting back on the road by revisiting the Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, and even your oath of enlistment or oath of office. We also make space for veterans, because fireworks, survivor guilt, and unprocessed emotions can make this week heavy, not festive.

If you found this helpful, subscribe, share it with a military friend, and leave a review so more families can find the encouragement. What’s one way you can support a service member or veteran this week?

Connect with us at hello@militarywellnesscollective.com

Transcript

Welcome And Why July Fourth Hits

SPEAKER_01 0:22

Hey y'all. Welcome back to another episode of the Military Wellness Collective. I'm Brittany Brown, and I'm going to be your host today. My husband and I have the pleasure of serving at Pillar Church of Topsell, right outside of Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune. And my husband Joshua is here today. I am here. And then he's here. I don't know when he hasn't been here. And then, of course, we have the privilege of uh hosting this podcast with our sweet friends Brian and Kelly O'Day, who serve at Pillar Church of Jacksonville and happen to be our sending church as we planted to the opposite side.

SPEAKER_03 0:54

Just so happened to be.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

Yeah, just so happened to be great. Very big influential part of our story. But that's another podcast. Today we're super excited. Happy birthday, America. Happy birthday. Wow. Yeah, I feel like we could have some like a oh, I should have brought those like little things.

SPEAKER_02 1:16

I don't know that that would have gone through the speaker very well. It would have sounded horrible.

SPEAKER_03 1:22

Yeah, you mentioned our director last episode, I think. Joshua's our director. Uh he's our producer.

SPEAKER_01 1:28

Oh, producer.

SPEAKER_02 1:29

Producer is the one holding up the which really just means I have the clock and I play with the volumes and the microphones.

SPEAKER_01 1:36

So if you ever have a problem, email us. He does it right now. Uh so we're really excited, you guys. Fourth of July is here as a military spouse. I get really emotional on this holiday. I was a military kid. So just really cool in 250 years. I love a good firework show. I love a good God bless America, you know, like those kind of things. So we're gonna talk about the joy and delight of serving our country today and just what that means, just how we can revel and celebrate the 4th of July. And so I just want to ask, I think Brian has a scripture he's gonna read for for us from Jeremiah 29. And just what are your thoughts when you hear that, Brian? The joy of serving your country.

SPEAKER_03 2:22

Yeah, I'll just I'll read the short version 29, verse seven. Seek in what this is Jeremiah chapter 29, verse 7. Seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you

Jeremiah 29 And Seeking Welfare

SPEAKER_03 2:35

into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare. And so we as Christians are exiles in whatever nation we find ourselves in. And we should seek the welfare of the city, the country that we find ourselves in. And serving in the military is protecting the welfare of our country, right? That's what it is. We are protecting it from people who don't want to allow us to do all the stuff that's before that in Jeremiah, like build houses and have families and eat the produce and everything else. And so I joined the military in the wake of September 11th, 2001. I know a lot of our audience wasn't born and doesn't remember uh September 11th, 2001. I get all that, but I joined, I I saw people fly planes into buildings and I had this sense of that should not happen. And somebody should do something about it.

SPEAKER_04 3:41

Right.

SPEAKER_03 3:41

And I think it's a good thing to to do something about it and to serve in our military. And when I see our folks that are in our church now, who some of them don't even remember that, and we we had relative peace for a few years that a lot of you folks were joining during, but you still said, hey, there's something, there's there's still bad actors in the world, there's still people who are trying to disrupt our life. And I just want to encourage you, you're doing a good thing. Now, some of you are, you know, there's ways to do it poorly, and there's ways to do it evilly. Um, but we're gonna assume that you're doing it well. And so I want to encourage you this week, this weekend, if you get some time off, take a break, take a knee, drink water, and replenish, like remind yourself why you're doing this and remind yourself that this is a good thing before the Lord and before other people, what you're doing, seeking the welfare of your city, or in this case, of your country.

SPEAKER_01 4:36

I love that you said read that verse because this is not advocating for idleness, it's advocating for intentionality and purposefully purposeful action to seek civil welfare. Yeah, which I really love that passage.

SPEAKER_02 4:53

When you said idle there, you said I be L E.

SPEAKER_01 4:56

Yes, not like idle, idle.

SPEAKER_02 4:59

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 5:00

I don't even know.

SPEAKER_02 5:03

Let's use the word passivity. Well, you need to talk about action.

SPEAKER_01 5:06

So I I think it's like you're not just passivity. Yeah, you're not just sitting there. You're active and and seeking the welfare of the city. Is there anything that comes to your mind, babe, when you think of the joy of serving?

SPEAKER_02 5:21

Yeah, so it's it's kind of a weird, a weird thing because most people that want to serve the country and they're they're selfless and they're putting their you know, lives on the line, literally and figuratively. Typically

Receiving Thanks Without Feeding Pride

SPEAKER_02 5:38

they don't like to have to be put on a pedestal. And so often during our nation's birthday, sometimes that can happen. And I would just encourage all of you out there that are serving your country, like be gracious in anything that comes of that and just enjoy it. And I I was I was pulled aside one one time many, many years ago, about how to deal with some of that and not fall into that prideful thought process and that that that state of mind. And and it was just like, hey, look, you don't have to say, Oh, don't thank me, you know, or just say, Oh, I appreciate that, and then move on. Um, and and appreciate that they're that you're appreciated, and then and celebrate. There's times of celebration, there's times of mourning, there's times of of of war, there's times of peace. So take this as a time of celebration, a milestone. Look back on the the time that you've been alive and been able to be in this country, being able to serve the country, and then the times before that, and then look to the future.

SPEAKER_03 6:45

Yeah, we talked about this a couple episodes ago. Graciously receive gratitude, gratitude. Like it's similar to graciously receiving praise. So when you get an award, when you get a promotion, was a context we talked about it a few episodes ago. Yeah, that's right. But I think it was whose glory are you working for? Yeah. Well, you can receive gratitude. So if you're at like a Fourth of July celebration with friends and family, and you know, somebody finds out that you're a service member or veteran, and and they're like, Man, thank you so much for your service. We can say I think a good default is thank you for your support. And or thank you for acknowledging it. Praise God that He's given me the ability to do that. Or say what Chick files is. My pleasure. It's my pleasure.

SPEAKER_01 7:33

It's my pleasure, it's my pleasure.

SPEAKER_03 7:35

Or the the slightly obnoxious tongue-in-cheek thing, a guy I served with, his retirement announcement. He said his retirement announcement was you're welcome for my service. That was a little uh obnoxious, but it went with his personality. But yeah, just like, hey, thank you for your support. Praise God that I'm able to do this. You know, Joshua, you're a recruiter once upon a time. Does everybody who walks in the recruiter office are they even qualified to serve in the military? Very few. Very few are even qualified, physically, physically qualified to serve in the military.

SPEAKER_02 8:10

Yeah, so there's there's a lot of requirements, and most people don't actually fit those requirements, and that pool of people is getting smaller as requirements, and the society changes.

SPEAKER_03 8:22

Right. And so, like, it's a like if you're if you're physically, mentally, emotionally able to serve in the military, then God has graced you with that. God has given you that ability, and so praise God for it, deflect some of that praise towards the Lord, and but and and also find joy in it, like God is not honored in just this begrudged, you know, grumbling. Like, God's not honored in that.

SPEAKER_00 8:50

Yeah. I think if your heart is going towards that grumbling place, I think it's good to step back and kind of think on those things and think, yeah, just like why is your husband serving or your spouse or whatever, and what are your thoughts on it all? I did I didn't grow up being near military. I didn't know much about it until I started dating you. And one thing that is just I don't know, it's just been so cool to have an up close, really up close, like just experience, I guess, in the military and what men and women they sacrifice their time with family, their lives. Like we have we've seen people die, you know, give up their life. I've I've faced my husband dying in combat deployments, you know, just like possibly dying. Sorry, not dying. Like, but just the possibility, like knowing that was and that is a very real thing. And God in his beautiful sovereignty has like grown me to love and appreciate the military and grown me closer to himself through all of it. But just I have we just have this unique privilege to see these families go through so much, like so many hardships apart. And in some in some ways, we're like, why are we doing this? This is just uncomfortable and it's hard. Like, why? And and there's that pull of like, let's not do this, let's get out and take the easy road. But you know, like so much comes with sacrifice. We have our freedoms and so many things in this country because of men and women willing to to give their lives and their time away from family. And it it makes me so proud and it makes me want to just continue to encourage the families like to keep going. And they yeah, that you're doing such a bigger thing that you can't even always see really.

SPEAKER_03 10:41

Yeah, I want to encourage folks like don't quit before you finish. I that was a title of a recent sermon of mine, and I stole it from a title of a book, Don't Quit Before You Finish. But like, don't quit just because it's hard. Don't quit until God makes it clear that it's time for you to be done. And

Endurance And Love That Sacrifices

SPEAKER_03 11:02

and He will. I just trust that God's gonna do that. Finish your service. So use these times where again, I'm trusting most people will get a little bit of time off. We could speak to those who don't, but if you get a little bit of time off, use this for encouragement to keep going, to keep doing the good thing that you're doing. Don't get discouraged and keep going. I I was talking to a guy who runs a collegiate ministry recently. And one of the reasons he's able to be on all these really secular university campuses with a Christian ministry is he was explaining, he's like, Well, the college knows that people that are involved in extracurricular activities, students that are involved, they are more apt to stay in school. And the college wants people staying in school. Right, right. They want people to graduate. It's a big problem for the university. And he made this assumption about us and our churches. He's like, I bet members of your churches are more apt to stay in the military, and they're able to endure in the military. And I was like, Man, I hope that's true. I don't know if it is or not. But I I feel like Christians should be able to endure the hardships of the military better than anybody. And so for Christians, we should be able to endure. Like we honor endurance, we honor steadfastness. The Lord shows his steadfast love. And so we should we should be able to endure until it's time to leave. And there's always a time for us to leave. It may be at 10 years, it may be at 20 years, it may be at four years, it may be at 30 years, who knows? But go until God calls you out. And so this is an exciting time to think about those things.

SPEAKER_01 12:46

I love what you said about God, honors endurance, like and he also honors sacrifice. And I think you have John 15 open. Can you read that, please, Brian?

SPEAKER_03 12:54

Yeah, this is a powerful statement. It gets used a lot around Christian military circles, but John 15, 13, Jesus tells his disciples, greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. And Jesus is talking about himself because he's about to lay down his life for his friends, his disciples, but then he's also calling them to do that for one another, which they do. They die for the faith, with you know, one kind of exception in John, but they die for the faith. And so sacrifice, a life of sacrifice is a good life. It is the most loving thing to do, is to sacrifice your rights, your freedoms, your privileges on behalf of other people. And that's what you're doing. If you're in this for selfish reasons, you should stop and um do it for sacrificial loving reasons. And you know, when you're hanging around friends and family, if you're able to do so, like, oh yeah, this is what we're doing, this is why we're doing this, so this can keep happening. We've been in war torn war-torn countries, and they don't get to like hang out in freedom and do what they want.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

Not having a barbecue.

SPEAKER_02 14:08

I love kind of scary, actually.

SPEAKER_01 14:11

So Brian just read John 15, 13. And I love John 15. The beginning of that passage is about the vine, and he's talking about pruning the vine so that there can be more fruit. And then before he Jesus says that, he says, I no longer call you, or I now call you friends, you're no longer servants. And then he talks about laying down his life for his friends. And so one of the greatest joys that I've had of being a military wife is living in community with so many people that are so willing to lay it all down because they love people they've never met. And if you really, yeah, like as we celebrate 250 years, like and think back on this nation's history and what we're actually celebrating, like, I know there's a bunch of whack stuff too, but seriously, y'all, these were people that were seeking religious freedoms and having something greater for their children, and we are benefiting from that. And so when I said the Fourth of July makes me emotional, I I am sentimental and a very like reflective person. And I love to journal. And I just think through some of this as a military spouse, like I sleep at night next to a man who was willing to give his life for our country, but also for our family and our children to have the freedoms and maintain the things that we have in this country. And no matter what anybody says to me, I think that's amazing. And so I just commend all you young families out there that are, you know, enduring the hardship now on this side. Like we're cheering for you. We've been there, we've done it, we see what you're going through, we understand it. And we are proud of you. We delight in what you are doing and are very, very grateful for it. And so I echo Brian's sentiments. Have fun this weekend, enjoy it, celebrate, be thankful. Yes, and and see it from the perspective, like reflect on why you actually joined the military. And as a spouse, maybe ask your husband some questions, like, what are we doing this for? Help help me remember so we can press on and see the joy in this.

SPEAKER_02 16:16

Can I bring up two ditches really quick and then give the like where are we in? Okay. Man, so you could be on one ditch of just not really paying much attention to what America stands for or what this Fourth of July means. And you could just be that, you know, guy who's there's there's a funny gif that I see on the on my phone every once in a while,

Avoiding The Two Patriotism Ditches

SPEAKER_02 16:37

where it's the guy out in the rain and it's like super windy, and he's holding an American flag and like a gun in the other hand, shirtless, just like American flag sports on it. Yeah, he's just doing the thing. He's just you know, you talk to that guy, and he's like, Merca, because guns and stuff, you know. That's one side of the category where people are just like all for they're putting the the nation on a pedestal.

SPEAKER_03 17:03

Which would cause you to believe things like America's never done anything wrong, right? We don't have real problems, that's right. But like we're all good, and the only you know, the only solution to solving real problems is well, if you don't like it, get out of here. Like that would so that's kind of the mentality you're pushing. That's one ditch. So that's one of the things that you're gonna do.

SPEAKER_01 17:26

So let's just remember that French.

SPEAKER_02 17:28

So the other ditch is these people who just want to bash on America all the time. And like it's an evil country, and all these people.

SPEAKER_00 17:35

Take our freedoms for granted in how they came to be. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 17:39

I would invite all of us to get back on the road, read the independent the Declaration of Independence, read the Constitution, Bill of Rights, and actually go back to okay, this is the foundation of our country, this is what you're serving to protect and defend. Get back on the road of that, and then understand how uh awesome it is that we live in this country where we have these rights, and then take those rights and then realize, oh, this is a responsibility as well. That we have the freedom to spread the gospel freely. We shouldn't take advantage of that and just kind of dismiss it and forget our rights and then just and use them for God's glory, because quite honestly, most people in the world don't have that freedom. And so yeah, I would just encourage you to celebrate that fact and stay on the road.

SPEAKER_03 18:33

Yeah. So we have rights and privileges to profess the gospel, to declare the gospel, and so we should take advantage of that. Like there's a very growing massive underground church in lots of countries in the world. They're they're prof you know, they're professing Christ even when they don't have those freedoms. We should profess Christ all the more with our freedoms to do that. So yeah, yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_01 19:01

I love what you bringing that up. Takes me back to what Brian said in 29, uh, Jeremiah 29, right? Like we can seek the welfare and love the city we live in. Like God did not say you can't love where you're at or don't defend what I've given you. Like, so we have to be careful not to misapply certain scriptures. What are you guys as hang on, let me reframe that. As we come to celebrate the Fourth of July this year, do you guys have any favorite memories of being in the military? Do you have a place maybe when you weren't in the United States that you celebrated the Fourth of July? How did that feel?

SPEAKER_03 19:42

Yeah, I uh I celebrated a Fourth of July in Afghanistan. And it was just good. Like it was very un celebratory in some ways, but we were part of an artillery battery and we gathered the guys around around the guns, and it was just it was just good, just to be like, hey guys, this is what we're

Deployment Memories And Helpful Traditions

SPEAKER_03 20:03

doing. And it was just a good excuse to gather around and remind ourselves what we're doing and why we're doing it. Part of me wishes I would have taken more advantage of that opportunity, but it's a good thing. I think another kind of habit that I started several years ago, I don't know when, is to read the Declaration of Independence on Independence Day on July 4th. That's what it is. It's it's the birthday of that, um, not other things. But reading the Declaration of Independence, I think helps remind us of some of why we came into existence as a country and what the ideals were. The other one I would encourage for those who are still on active duty is to read your oath of enlistment or read your oath of office. We're supposed to be doing that every time we re-enlist or every time for officers, it's usually every time you get promoted that you re restate, reaffirm your oath of enlistment or oath of office. And there's just some good things in there, and people do weird stuff with it, but let's do Christian stuff with it. Let's say this is a good thing to support and defend these ideals that this country is based on, and the freedoms and the rights and the privileges that we provide for folks.

SPEAKER_02 21:20

I'm trying to remember w what Fourth of July in Iraq was my first deployment.

SPEAKER_01 21:26

I can remember where I was in last year and on that deployment.

SPEAKER_02 21:29

All I remember was it was so hot and I was wearing so much gear and I was sweating so much, and it was just sand everywhere. It was miserable. And I but I don't remember what fourth of July. Like we were we were out, like there was a lot of deployed two other ones, and I can't remember what we did. We didn't pay attention to what day it was. It was like, hey, by the way, 4th of July. You were protecting our freedom, right now. Yeah, it was it was one of those times where it was like you just lost track of what day it was because you were just living, you know, water bottle by water bottle, you know.

SPEAKER_01 22:06

It's interesting you say that because I remember it when I asked that question just now, I was like, whoa, those memories popped in my head. Your first deployment to Iraq, the fourth of July. I mean, it was huge. We were on Camp Pendleton. On the beach that they have different artists that will come and do the military, you know, Fourth of July events. But this one was massive. I think Rascal Flats was there. The guy who wrote, I don't want to say it because it's not appropriate. The after September 11th. Oh, Toby. Yes, Toby Keep. Thank you. You hear the lyrics. Um, he was there, and it the beach was filled with military wives. There were few men there, but I mean the base at that point was pretty cleared up. You went with a friend that was so yes, we were both pregnant. I was pregnant with Tatum. This is July. I had her in October, and my friend was pregnant, and her water broke while we were there, and her husband was gone. And like everybody was just so excited around us, and like, whoa, America, she's having a baby, you know, and like I just remember the security people taking us on the little golf cart, you know, and like it just the base was just so filled with excitement, even though we were all so I don't want to say fearful, but worried about the news we could receive the next morning, you know. So when I think of like the joy of being an American, I just think back of or joy of serving our country. I think back to those moments with these young women. And some of their husbands didn't come home. And our friend who went into labor, sadly, he was one of the stats of the 22 veterans a day later on. But I just like there's so much joy that can be had in this community when we surround one another and remember what we're doing. And something I remember distinctly was when Jesus said he was going to sacrifice. Like Brittany, you're doing nothing that he hasn't already done for you. And that was something during that season that became very clear to me. Like when God asks us to sacrifice in ministry or sacrifice in the military, we are imaging him. And I don't ever want to lose sight of that.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

Yeah, we can do it with joy and delight. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 24:30

Can I make a plea to think about our veterans since you mentioned so uh these patriotic holidays can be especially difficult for veterans for a couple reasons. One is thinking about what we did and why we did it, and we often have a whole lot of unprocessed thoughts and emotions about it all.

Supporting Veterans And Celebrating Safely

SPEAKER_03 24:52

And so thinking about that, we have friends, people, friends, guys we worked for, guys we worked over that did not come home, and so we have some survivor guilt from that. And then we also just like I don't I don't like fireworks. I I just don't. So I usually detach from the firework aspects of the Fourth of July. And so when you sit, just keep in mind your veterans, they they're doing a lot as they do that. Active duty, sometimes you guys are really good at like next thing, next thing, next thing, and not thinking about it. But part of the like challenge for veterans is we do nothing but process our service sometimes. And so just keep in mind, so if you s if you're around a veteran, you know, pull up beside them, especially as an active duty person, they you're gonna learn some things about service hearing somebody think about it in the past, and you're going to really encourage them that there's a next generation that's stepping up to the thing that they stepped up to as well.

SPEAKER_01 25:57

Did you have something you were gonna say about that? Nope. Yeah, I just I like that, Brian. Think of the veterans. My dad was a United States Marine, but sadly he was a statistic too of suicide. But he did love the Fourth of July and he loved talking with Joshua about the Marine Corps. He was like anytime he could talk about the good old days or just what it was like for him serving, it Joshua's like the golden son. He never truly you're a Marine.

SPEAKER_03 26:31

Yeah, and when they ask, when a veteran asks you about what's going on in your life, take that opportunity, like share about it, but then also ask them, hey, what was it like in your day? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:42

Oh man, and he liked to talk about that. Yeah, let me tell you, with Marine Corps, not the Marine Corps, it used to be, you know, I just remember that. There's just so much excitement around this holiday, and this is a big one. 250. I mean, I here where we're at in eastern North Carolina, I don't know where y'all are at out there listening, but people got their banners out already. It's already been for a while, I feel like. Um we got the flag slions and all the things. So just you know, gather some people, have a barbecue, talk about what y'all are doing and why you're doing it, encourage one another, have fun. I don't put a little kiddie pool out for your toddlers, let them play and do all the things and celebrate. I don't think in the Christian life sometimes we just don't celebrate enough in the West. Like we're really good at like being stoic and doing hard things, but we need to celebrate.

SPEAKER_03 27:34

Yeah, celebrate smart too. It's a dangerous holiday. Yes, we're mixing pyrotechnics and alcohol. Um or pyrotechnics and toddlers, and just like be smart out there.

SPEAKER_02 27:46

Let's not add unnecessary tragedy to celebration pyrotechnics, toddlers, alcohol, and firearms. Just throw them all together and see what happens.

SPEAKER_01 27:58

Yeah, yeah, be smart. Be wise.

SPEAKER_02 28:00

Um make it memorable, but also and make it memorable in good ways. 250 years is a long time. And you can take some time to reflect on that, but it's also a very short.

SPEAKER_01 28:11

I'm just thinking that like we're baby, we're a baby country.

SPEAKER_02 28:16

But who yeah, take the time to just remember that and realize that you're living through historic moments and and it it can reflect on that because history is just a I mean, if you read a history book, it's really just talking about what happened from one war to the next war, and how people's borders changed from this place to that place, or which countries got taken over by other countries and the birth of certain nations, and then the ending of certain nations. And we're at 250, and that's a good time to reflect on that, where where we came from and how short but how long of a time that is.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

Yeah. Does anybody have any last minute thoughts they're just burning to say?

SPEAKER_03 28:56

Happy birthday. Yeah, I love it. Happy birthday, America.

SPEAKER_01 28:59

We love you guys. We're so glad that you joined us today. We hope you guys have a happy Fourth of July. Stay safe out there and uh celebrate with one another. If you have questions or ideas that you would like us to chat about and have conversations over, you can email us at hello at military wellness collective.com. Again, that's hello at military wellness collective.com, and we'll take an episode to talk with you. Thanks, guys.