Savor Wellness: How Chocolate Builds Resilience

Is your daily life stuck on autopilot? Mindfulness often feels abstract or intimidating, but today’s guest proves it can be both decadent and simple. Dr. C sits down with Melissa Mueller-Douglas, a Licensed Master Social Worker and CEO of MYRetreat Inc., to explore her award-winning framework: Chocolate Mindfulness™. Melissa shares how she transforms a simple piece of chocolate into a powerful anchor to ground your senses, reduce anxiety, and build lasting resilience in both life and business.

In this episode, you will learn:

• The Science of Savoring: How to rewire your brain to identify ease instead of stress using tangible rewards.
• Corporate Connection: Why leaders are replacing outdated "trust falls" with gratitude journaling and chocolate to boost team culture.
• Architecting Your Legacy: Strategies to build bold boundaries and design a life of purpose, from daily habits to immersive retreats.
• Practical Application: A guided walkthrough on how to eat chocolate mindfully for instant stress relief.

Get exclusive listener discounts at mydeals.page/jhrt. Click any deal, and the code LIFEPODCAST applies automatically at checkout to save you money and support the show.

Thank you for listening! We'd love to hear from you!

Transcript

Dr C 0:00

Hola and welcome to live podcast. I'm your host, Dr. C. Let me ask you something. When was the last time you truly slowed down? Not just not working, but truly disconnected from the noise of the world to hear your own voice again. For so many of us, life feels like a constant rush. We're managing careers, families, and the endless to-do lists. And our own well-being slips to the bottom of that pile. We know we should be more mindful, but the practice can feel intimidating, abstract, or just one more thing to do. But what if I told you the path to greater peace, clarity, and resilience can be both simple and decadent. My guest today is here to show us how. Melissa Mueller Douglas, a licensed social worker, a mindfulness expert, and the founder of My Retreat. She created Chocolate Mindfulness, a guided experience that pairs chocolate tasting with meditation. Partnering with forward-thinking companies, she helps leaders and teams replace outdated trust balls with chocolate for team building, strengthening focus, resilience, and connection. Today, we're going to explore the three flavors of her work. From an app you can use today to powerful team workshops to a luxurious retreat in Grand Cayman designed to help you become the architect of your legacy. Melissa, welcome to the live podcast. We're so happy to have you here today.

Melissa 1:39

Thank you so much for having me. I'm thrilled to be here with you and your listeners.

Dr C 1:44

I'm excited to talk about the word chocolate because I've never associated chocolate with mindfulness. So it's never been in the same sentence, but definitely a win because it is. So if we could start with the foundation for our listeners, when we hear the word mindfulness, we hear it everywhere. So from a clinical perspective, we often define it as paying attention on purpose, in being in the present moment without judgment. But how do you define mindfulness? And where on earth does chocolate come into the picture?

Melissa 2:19

Mindfulness is the practice of gifting yourself your full attention. And that's without rushing. The chocolate comes in because we pair the mindfulness with chocolate since our minds are craving something tangible. When you hold a piece of chocolate, and especially when you taste it, we hear that people aren't worrying about the past or thinking about the future. And your mind immediately shifts out of autopilot. Your senses wake up and your mind slows down. So chocolate becomes that anchor that helps you stay present long enough to actually feel the benefits of mindfulness instead of just understanding it conceptually or clinically.

Dr C 3:06

Wow, I love that. Thank you. Because I know you asked me to have some chocolate with me today. And I had a Snickers bar cut into a piece because I don't think you wanted me to have a whole Snickers bar for our time together, but it's sitting there looking at me, and I cannot wait to the moment where we actually bring chocolate into the picture. That's powerful to think that you know it's not a gimmick, it's an anchor, right? And it brings us into the present moment. And I think you call it like a tangible reward in your workshop guide. So you're taking a very abstract concept of being present and grounding it in a physical and sensory experience. And the science on this underlying practices is so clear, right? So your guide for teens, for example, talks about the body scan. Um, noting that the body scan is a practice significantly related to improvements in psychological well-being and decrease in anxiety. You put a positive spin on it instead of just scanning for discomfort, which many traditional body scans do, your methods ask us to identify parts of your body that have a feeling of ease. So tell me about that choice.

Melissa 4:17

You're absolutely right. Most people already know where stress lives in their body, whether that's their shoulders, their neck, their back, and they're subconsciously scanning for attention all day long. So instead, when we intentionally look for ease within our bodies, we are rewiring the brain to identify comfort. And that is a ritual or a skill that we support people in beginning for themselves.

Dr C 4:50

You know, share that story. Maybe a real world example of someone who came to you, maybe to a workshop or one of your retreats, and they were feeling stuck or overwhelmed. How do these practices help them find that clarity and build a new foundation for their life?

Melissa 5:05

Every day I hear another story, whether it's from ladies who came with us to the Cayman Islands or have experienced anyone, all genders, right, who have experienced the workshops or are using the My Retreat app. But the most recent story from this week is the one that I'll share with you today. And so I was leading a chocolate mindfulness workshop to an intimate group, just 25 people. And uh I led a guided imagery practice. And afterwards, I always asked for people to share what it felt like for them, you know, what their their takeaway was. And one of the women came up to me afterwards and said that she was as a child in a position where she really had to be like another parent, where she had to act more mature, had to take care of her siblings, and that because of that, she has put up this armor, this external armor where uh nobody makes her cry. And she she shared or disclosed, right? Nobody has ever made her cry. And yet, while she was listening to that live meditation that I was facilitating around guided imagery and connecting with your most vulnerable self, she said she wasn't anticipating that I was going to have her imagine her most vulnerable self standing on a on a beach. And and that when I said that part of the meditation, she saw her younger self. So she saw her younger self and she said that that made her start to tear up. And it was so interesting to her because she she never thought that meditation could lead to that. But when I asked her what her takeaway was or what gift she gave her most vulnerable self, she said it was to let go and let God. And that was a really powerful message to give her younger self, her current self, right? Just that that grace of whatever is meant to be will be.

Dr C 7:17

So I really love you know the idea of letting go and you know, having some grace for yourself as well.

Melissa 7:23

Yes. If I may, I'll just share one more, which is much faster. So the next day, I was invited to a networking event that had a lot of the same people who came to the chocolate mindfulness retreat. And so I showed up, and the staff who organized the workshop were also at this event. And uh, one of the people who who brought me in said, Did you hear what she just said? You know, a colleague of his, he said, I've never heard her say no when I asked for you know her to do something. And she said no. He's like, I think she's listening and implementing some of what you're talking about, that if it's not gonna, you know, bring her value or serve her in that moment, or if she's just at capacity and can't take on one more thing without being overburdened, that she said no. And he said he never saw that, but he loved it, loved seeing it in action in that moment.

Dr C 8:15

So let's talk about the distinct flavors that you have, right? That you engage with in your work. I believe you have three flavors that you talk about. Brilliant. So let's start with the most accessible one: your My Retreat app. For the listeners who are hearing this and thinking, I need this in my life today. What will they find when they download it?

Melissa 8:38

Bite-sized meditations designed for real people with real schedules. There's weekly live chocolate mindfulness sessions. They're called live retreats. They happen on Wednesdays in the afternoons and just starting this month on Thursdays in the evening, because we understand if you're doing it at work, maybe it's your night shift, evening shift. But also if you can't get away in the middle of the day to take care of yourself, then you can join us in the evening. And additionally, we have a chocolate subscription. So although I heard one of your favorite chocolates is a Snickers bar, and you can get that anywhere, many, many places, right? For some, they want to try something new, something that maybe is a higher cacao content or just a chocolate from a different place. So we have chocolates from Ecuador that we ship out. I just shipped out chocolates today to our subscribers. And so the people receiving it in the next couple of days are getting our variety chocolates, which are a white milk and dark. And what we find is oftentimes, if you don't actually have enough chocolate, right? Or or little bite-sized pieces of chocolate to have every single day, that you're gonna say, you know, you're gonna use something else. We've seen people use a banana, barbecue chips, uh, all sorts of alternatives because they didn't have chocolate on hand. But the other reason why we suggest the chocolate subscription is because when you see it, when you keep it in your, you know, desk drawer or in your briefcase, wherever you might keep it, it's that reminder to actually pause and take a break in the day, which many people are just zooming past thinking they'll be more productive if they don't pause.

Dr C 10:26

Yes, yes. Well, that's fantastic. I'm gonna download the retreat myself because I could always use mindfulness in my pocket, right? Just being able to grab it and and take care of myself in the moment. So I love that. And you're shipping chocolate to people. So that's a winner, right? Definitely something that I'm interested in. So let's talk about the second flavor is chocolate mindfulness for teams.

Melissa 10:49

That's right. Teams are craving connection, and mindfulness gives them a shared experience that dissolves tension. And because the practices that we share in the workshop are repeatable, teams leave with practical tools that they can use between meetings, during stressful projects, or when communication breaks down. It's the opposite of performative team building because it's real embodied connection.

Dr C 11:22

And that's so critical, right? It's not just a perk, but it's part of a tool for better work, right? So your guide notes that instilling and expressing gratitude is a simple way companies can increase employee job satisfaction. So your framework includes gratitude journaling, and that has real measurable benefits, right? For for individuals, but tell me more about the benefits to a company's culture.

Melissa 11:48

Particularly with the gratitude journaling?

Dr C 11:51

Yes.

Melissa 11:52

Yes, okay. So I'll just tell a story because we have so many of them as an example. So there was a team that had meetings, of course, we all do, right? But they had the typical meetings where people were dreading going because they felt like it was going to be the exact same thing every single time. But what they realized after doing our gratitude journaling was this particular group was a philanthropic group. And so they know what they do when they're working with donors, right? Individuals or groups that are giving money to the communities. And what they do is they kind of sandwich it, right? So they start with a compliment, they go in for the ask, and they end with gratitude. And that's part of their training, you know, how they engage with funders. And yet, what they realized was during their meetings, their internal meetings, that they didn't have any recipe for how to let their guard down, how to engage with a human-to-human connection instead of just going right to business. And so what they now do and began doing right after our workshop was at the beginning of every meeting, their their weekly meeting, their team meeting, they now gratitude journal right before. And it gives them an opportunity to share what's top of mind that they're thankful for. And organically, typically there are shout-outs that are happening where they're saying, I didn't have a chance to let you know after that last sprint, or, you know, whatever, whatever the case may be in the work cycle, that you really had my back, you really helped me out. And it it helps to bring that to the beginning of their meetings. And they're really liking that transformation of setting the tone, setting the energy for work that has to get done, but it it mixes it up and helps them feel like something new is going to unfold before they get into the traditional ways of doing their meetings.

Dr C 14:05

Yeah. And that's the Grand Cayman Chocolate Mindfulness Retreat. It's a six-day retreat at the Black Urchin Resort.

Melissa 14:18

Right, a woman-owned resort.

Dr C 14:20

What what happens there at the immersive experience?

Melissa 14:24

It's for women who carry a lot, leaders, founders, executives, and caregivers, women who have a powerful story to tell. And that's the the secret saucer, the differentiator. I created it so that people who have these strengths in their personal lives and professional lives can have a platform and an intimate setting to share their stories through masterminds. So I help co-create masterminds in advance based on the ladies who are going to be attending. And then our speaker participants have that leadership role for a one-hour mastermind. And for the remainder of those six days, they become the participants and get to be in front of their peers and hear their masterminds. And then the car rides to the restaurants in the afternoons, to the adventures like the crystal caves, when we go on the bioluminescence tour, that's where the real magic happens because they're synthesizing what they've learned, those aha moments, and they're not just, you know, going to a presentation, leaving, and not having an opportunity to share what resonated, give that real-time feedback. It's like a hybrid of you know being in a living room because this is the room behind me that we have these masterminds. It's a really beautiful setting. But also this opportunity to have like a real life focused group because these ladies are living in ensuites right with you in our villa. And so they're able, after our morning mindful swims, or after the massage in the afternoon, or the rest that is baked into every single day of our itinerary, to say, you know, I thought of something else I wanted to share. I thought of how I'm going to implement this into my life starting now. So we gather at this private oceanfront villa where we have immersive chocolate mindfulness workshops, and of course, a private chef coming in for our meals as well. The theme in March is to be the architect of your legacy. And that's those themes are what anchors are weak. So women leave with clarity, they leave with confidence, they leave with a blueprint for how they want to lead their next chapter. So it's an opportunity to connect, play, and rest, all wrapped into one retreat.

Dr C 16:56

That sounds like an amazing time. Um so just to poke the bear a little bit, right? So it's a retreat and everybody's feeling really good and they're having a great time. Then they get back home. Reality hits, emails pile up, laundry, you know, you name it, right? So, how do you help them integrate what they've learned so it becomes part of their daily life, not just a beautiful memory or beautiful experience? I know you offer virtual pre-post-retreat reunions. So tell me a little bit more about that.

Melissa 17:29

Integration is everything. That's why we start before the retreat with virtual meet and greets and a 21-day chocolate mindfulness challenge, so that women arrive already connected, knowing what each other does through gifts. Like this time in December, everybody's receiving a pair of custom AI-tailored shoes that are the company's called Iambic, and Dave Wing is one of the co-founders who will be with us in December. So everybody is gonna know and feel what it is that she does so well. And then when she when we're all there, we get to know more about who we are and our whys behind what we do, what we do. So, so after the retreat, after we arrive back home to kids, to partners, to deadlines, we meet for quarterly virtual reunions to keep the transformation alive. So we revisit what's working, what needs care, and how practices are evolving. And what we find is that ladies are flying to visit one another, uh, they're supporting each other on their boards, they are purchasing products, engaging in services. All of that I would never promise because, you know, I can't say I'm gonna be mindful, right? I'm not gonna say what is going to happen with each cohort, but it's consistently happening. And it's so incredible to see that support and camaraderie because with genuine connection, they want to stay connected and they want to grow in those relationships because they've made new friends and created new boundaries and you know, built up their their confidence and they want to continue to engage with the people that they they've done that with that work with. That's pretty awesome.

Dr C 19:28

So now is the time that I'm so excited for because I want you to walk us through an opportunity so that I can have my chocolate.

Melissa 19:39

Well, if there's one takeaway from our conversation today, it is to eat your chocolate mindfully. So we are going to go ahead and do that together. What I'll say though is for those who don't have chocolate with you, right now it is okay. We've got your back. If you join the live retreat tomorrow or any Wednesday, if you're listening to this on a replay, there's opportunity to have a live 20-minute free retreat virtual with me and whoever else joins us. It's a moment of presence that can shift your entire day. And when repeated, that can shift your whole life. So with that, it's chocolate mindfulness time. Join me in taking your chocolate, holding it in the palm of your hand, noticing its weight. Listen to the sound as you unwrap the wrapper. Look at the colors, the texture, the shape and size, areas of dullness or shine. And what could look to the untrained eye like an area of imperfection. Yet there is no such thing in chocolate. As you bring that chocolate up to your lips, notice any changes that may be happening in your mouth. As you take three deep breaths in. So listen to the sound and break the chocolate in half. If not. Join me in taking the chocolate, placing it on your tongue, rolling it around as you notice the flavors register on your taste buds. What is it like chocolate? Smell it.

Dr C 22:46

And and thinking about how excited I was to buy penny candy.

Melissa 22:52

Yes.

Dr C 22:54

So it was an experience, right? So that's what came to my mind. So that that was a different way of kind of embracing the moment and what I had the chocolate. I was I've never eaten chocolate mindfully. And I really enjoyed that. That was really good.

Melissa 23:13

Beautiful, beautiful. Well, I thank you for sharing your reflections. But when you intentionally shift to focusing on the look of the chocolate and realizing that, you know, it does have little ridges or you know, little swirls from the way that it was made, or even just the mouthfeel and playing with that, as you may be aware subconsciously or otherwise, if you were to have had chocolate with some tea or coffee, right? Whether that's hot coffee or iced coffee, the mouthfeel is going to be completely different. So when somebody tells me during one of these workshops, oh, you know, it was kind of gritty, I didn't really like my chocolate, I'll ask them. I'll say, okay, that's, you know, of course it's valid. And it's your prerogative to never have it again. And tell me about that drink that you have right there. And they'll say, you know, oh, it's an ice, whatever. And so enlighten them, right? If they didn't already know that the cold, cool temperature impacts the cacao and the cocoa butter in the chocolate. So it might get gritty or just an unpleasant texture. And so that's less about the chocolate and more about life, right? Before coming into a meeting, before getting onto stage, we likely are opening, you know, mail that might be surprising, shocking, or seeing something on social media that was jarring or upsetting. And so it's not all about that one moment, like it's a clean slate always, or like ran a vacuum and you know, you're you're there to be your best self at all times. But if you can be aware of the fact, first of all, what impacts you in a way that shifts your emotions and your, you know, the way that you present and engage with others, then you can intentionally pause and do something for yourself, like a body scan to feel where you're feeling good. So you can shift your mindset or do a gratitude journaling. And it takes less than 60 seconds to do the gratitude journaling the way that we do in our workshop. So it is feasible in the amount of time it would take to take a quick bio break to actually journal and to help balance yourself and get back centered. Uh so that chocolate reminder helps to spill into other parts of our lives as well and our relationships and the way that we show up and engage with one another.

Dr C 25:51

This is a question that we ask all our guests. Okay. So if our listeners could do just one thing differently tomorrow, to begin their evolution, to start being the architect of their own legacy, what would you recommend?

Melissa 26:07

If we think about being the architect of our legacy, we want to make sure that the stories that people are able to tell about us are ones that we want to be remembered by and for. And there's that quote that we all know well about people not necessarily remembering what you said, but the way that you made them feel. And so begin each interaction or at minimum each day by setting an intention for how you want to ideally make people feel, right? What is your intention for how you want people to feel? And that can help guide how you communicate, how you engage your next steps. Certainly it's helped me in my personal and professional lives, and I hear that it helps others. So that would be the next thing for tomorrow. The first thing you do when you wake up, instead of first scrolling or, you know, just getting right to the stove and making breakfast so you can get into your day, just pause and ask yourself what's your intention for how ideally you would want others to feel. And that can help frame the flow of your day.

Dr C 27:22

Simple, actionable, and available to everyone. Thank you so much for being with us here today. I appreciate you sharing your expertise. And I really appreciate you sent me sharing all the three flavors of chocolate mindfulness. I'm sure that our listeners are going to find extreme value in your products, as well as you may even get some people signing up for Grand Caden. Okay. So thank you so much. I look forward to us connecting again.

Melissa 27:50

It has been a gift to share space with you. And I hope everyone listening gifts themselves one small moment of presence today, because we all deserve it.

Dr C 28:02

What a beautiful conversation. It's amazing, isn't it, to think that something as simple as joyful as a piece of chocolate when we pair with intention can be a gateway to so much. My big takeaway today is that mindfulness doesn't have to be this rigid, stoic, or cold practice. It can be rich and warm and sensory. It's about using all of our senses to saborlight, to slow down, to truly be where we are. My other big takeaway is the power of that phrase. Be the architect of your legacy. That requires bold boundaries and the courage to step away from the noise so that you can hear your own voice. So here's your call to action today. Prioritize you. Choose one step. You don't have to book a flight to the Grand Canyon tomorrow. Although that sounds amazing. But maybe it's downloading the My Retreat app. Maybe it's taking that one thing Melissa recommended and trying it, right? Or maybe it's just the next time you have a cup of coffee or a piece of fruit, or yes, a piece of chocolate, whatever. You just pause. And for 60 seconds, you just give yourself that gift. Thank you for investing in your well-being by being here today. Until next time. Keep on learning, stay inspired, continue to flourish, and never stop evolving. I'm your host, Dr. C, and this is the Life Podcast. Ready to live your best life?

Melissa 29:39

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