Is Your Retirement Introvert or Extrovert?

This week on Sherapy with Sheri & Randy, we’re talking about a comment that honestly… stung a little. After our episode joking about the things we swore we’d never do in retirement — early dinners, slowing down, multiple pairs of glasses and all — a viewer challenged us to “get up and move” and stop “acting old.”

But it sparked a bigger conversation… because retirement doesn’t look the same for everyone. Some people are living the “go-go” retirement full of travel, dancing, and activity… while others are navigating health issues, finances, grief, burnout, or simply enjoying a slower pace after decades of hard work.

In this episode, we talk honestly about social media assumptions, feeling judged, and why there’s no one right way to grow older. Whether your retirement is extrovert or introvert, active or restful… your journey is valid. ❤️

👋 Stay connected:
Subscribe, follow  & leave a review if Sherapy made you laugh, cry, or text your therapist.

 Got a comment, story or one word suggestion you'd like to share?
I want to hear it. Share your story (anonymously or not) at:
 sherapypodcast@gmail.com

Want more Sherapy between episodes?
Check out my book on Amazon:
👉 https://a.co/d/bUDtNIU
It’s honest, hilarious, and healing — just like the podcast

More episodes, blog & extras:
sherapywithsheritodd.com

Follow the chaos (and healing) here:
Instagram →@sherapywithsheriandrandy

Facebook →https://www.facebook.com/sherapywithsheriandrandy

YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/@CruisintheIE

Theme music by: Sheri Todd and MakeBestMusic

Written & hosted by: Sheri Todd

 Recorded somewhere between healing and humor.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Have you ever had someone judge your entire life from one moment? Because that just happened to me. And I'm gonna be honest, it's dung. And not because it was kind of mean, but because it assumed everything about me, about us, from one video. Now, before we get into this, if you're new here, this is Cherby. Sherry and Randy, yeah. And we're a commute, a growing community where we talk about real life after 50, after 60, the good, the hard, everything between. So if that's your kind of conversation, go ahead and hit subscribe. That was your job, Randy.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Oh, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 0:42

And come along with us because today's topic, it all started with one comment. Last little stay a while. Retired life still makes a smile. Shelly and be cruising along. Welcome to Cherry where you belong. So this comment that we're gonna talk about came from our last episode. And it was the episode where we were talking about uh all the things we swore that we would never do in retirement. We were laughing at ourselves because life changes.

SPEAKER_00 1:22

Big time.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

And then this comment came in talking about staying active, going to the gym, getting your hair done, going out dancing, and taking care of yourself, and even saying things like, you need to get up and move around and stop acting like a 90-year-old. And again, there's truth in parts of that. But I think what hit me was realizing how easy it is, especially on social media, for someone to take one moment, a clip, uh, a conversation, and build it into a whole story. Yeah, that's really not what's going on. That's not true. And that's just kind of where we are now in society. People are gonna be blunt, sometimes a little harsh, not even realize how it lands.

SPEAKER_00 2:14

Well, you know, I I've read it, we both read it, and I take it as a somebody. I would think a woman. I'm not sure of that, but I would think it was me.

SPEAKER_01 2:25

Yeah, I'm not sure if it was a man or a woman. But either way, uh I mean it was just well in the comment it also, which proves to me that this person was just going by the video. They really didn't know Randy and I talk about you know, wearing perfume and going out dancing and doing stuff romantic. And you know, Randy and I are brothers and sisters. We're we're, you know, we're not that kind of brother and sister.

SPEAKER_00 2:51

Nope.

SPEAKER_01 2:52

Obvious. They thought we were married, and that got me to thought, you know, there's different kinds of retirement. And there's the go-go retirement, the kind that she's talking about traveling, the dancing, the going out, staying active, going to the gym, putting on perfume and going to a piano bar. You know, if you're gonna do that with your husband or wife, I guess.

SPEAKER_00 3:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:13

And that's a great thing. That's that's great. And that's a version of a lot of people have, honestly, when they think about retirement. And we love that. I I it's it's something. But and and that's part of what we do with crews in the IE. We go out and we explore and we see what's around us.

SPEAKER_00 3:33

We meet new friends, new people, new associates. It's it's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 3:37

You know, but then there's the other side, the one that people don't really talk a lot about. It's the slowing down, dealing with health issues, finances, loss, or just plain exhaustion after years of working hard at a hard, exhausting job.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

Yeah. And it bitters you. It's just sad.

SPEAKER_01 3:55

And that's another comment that she brought up that she was taught, or he, I we don't know, just a 63-year-old retired person who used to be a chef, saying that they were taught to save money. And um, okay, everybody's taught to save money. You can plan that type of retirement, but then life is gonna come in and slap you upside the face, and you're gonna have health changes, money changes, life changes. And all of a sudden the version that you thought you were gonna have isn't what is the reality.

SPEAKER_00 4:27

Think about it, just before the pandemic hits. How many lives were changed retirement-wise because of that pandemic, that pandemic? I mean, it's it's gotta be an I wish I knew the numbers. It's gotta be uh astronomical. How many seniors got hurt with that?

SPEAKER_01 4:43

Hurt how?

SPEAKER_00 4:44

Financially or physically, the house is into an early retirement. Yeah. You know, lots of things, you know.

SPEAKER_01 4:51

Because they lost their jobs. Yeah. Jobs went away.

SPEAKER_00 4:53

I mean, it's you know, that's why you can look at it in all different kinds of ways, retirement, but man, I'll tell you, take care of yourself and what surrounds you. I know things outside sometimes dictate what you what happens in your life. But if you worry just about yourself and your your inner circle of people, that's what it's all about. Yeah, it really is. That's why we talk about because there's so many different things that retired people or older people go through. That young people just don't understand.

SPEAKER_01 5:22

And in the last episode, we were joking about that, we were laughing at ourselves, talking about how life had shifted when we've got into retirement. And but what was received was something very different. And the message in the comment wasn't bad, but the assumption didn't match the reality. And I kind of felt we were being judged, or and I think a lot of it was directed towards me without being fully seen. Now, listen, I knew when we went into this, me being out there that people are going to comment about my weight and my health and everything else, and I know a lot of it is out of kindness. If it was super, super mean, I would definitely have blocked them. But I know that's gonna come where I'm gonna block people because they're gonna be downright rude, and that's gonna happen. I know that. Um but I am healthy, but people assume being overweight, you're not healthy. And I I don't know what to tell you. I mean, I am I'm who I am. I don't can't afford to go out and get my hair done for 300 bucks where people go out and get them colored and get it cut. You know, I'm at great clips. That's where I'm going to get my hair cut. And still that's expensive because I it's like $25, $35 would tip. That's a lot for somebody who's living only on Social Security. So maybe you're out there dancing, traveling, staying active.

SPEAKER_00 6:48

I hope you are. I wish the best for everything.

SPEAKER_01 6:50

I mean that is awesome.

SPEAKER_00 6:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:53

But if you're in that season of slowing down, healing, just figuring things out, or maybe you're somewhere in between. And again, that's what cruising the IU is all is all about. It's not showing a perfect version of life, but reminding people that getting out, even in small ways, still matters. It doesn't have to be big. Sometimes it's just getting in the car and going somewhere different.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

And like she said, it was our way of kind of showing how we feel with people.

SPEAKER_01 7:21

You know, even at our age, you can get out and go out and explore. And that's what cruising the IE is all about.

SPEAKER_00 7:28

It's all new things, man. It's awesome. I love it. It's just great.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

It's a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_00 7:32

I mean, it's local for us pretty much, you know, to an extent, but it's like traveling.

SPEAKER_01 7:37

Yeah, well, exactly. Well, you went to Vegas this weekend. How tiring was that for you?

SPEAKER_00 7:42

Oh, I couldn't wait to get home.

SPEAKER_01 7:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:44

We were only there a day.

SPEAKER_01 7:45

Because sometimes you go on a vacation, I think most people know this. It's not relaxing.

SPEAKER_00 7:50

No.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

Because you spend maybe a day or two after getting home just recovering. But you know, because you're seeing all the sights and you're going, going.

SPEAKER_00 7:57

But it was all worth it for me to watch my grandson play basketball and he's freaking turned out he's a good player. And that made my whole weekend, that was awesome. And that's another thing, too. I mean, you live as a uh I guess I'm kind of rolling into this, is that when you do get older, you have your grandchildren too. And the opportunities of being able to see them and grow and do things that they love to do is the most incredible feeling in the world. I was so proud of my grandson yesterday. And um I wouldn't change that for the world.

SPEAKER_01 8:28

You're either an extrovert or an introvert. You know, and a therapist told me once, you're one or the other. You can't change that. And I think retirement's the same way. If you're an extrovert, you're probably gonna have the kind of retirement where you're out running around doing a whole bunch of fun and and traveling and you know, going to clubs or whatever, whatever you enjoy doing. You're more active. I think if you're an introvert, your retirement's gonna be also a little quieter. You're perfectly happy staying home on the weekends, eating a pizza and watching a movie. That's okay with you, or having some friends over and playing some cards or whatever. That's okay. And we've had other comments that have, you know, kind of they've been, I don't want to say critical, but they've been something about my weight. You know, I need to stop eating sugar, things like that. Randy needs to dance. Somebody said, Randy needs to get out and dance more. So I was thinking what we need to do, Randy, is like every day we need to do a little video that says, have you danced today? And we'll dance to something.

SPEAKER_00 9:38

What?

SPEAKER_01 9:39

Whatever.

SPEAKER_00 9:40

I guess that's fine.

SPEAKER_01 9:41

I'll have Alexa say.

SPEAKER_00 9:43

I'm I'm into embarrassing myself, so right on.

SPEAKER_01 9:46

At this age, who cares?

SPEAKER_00 9:48

That's it.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

We'll probably get some comments. People make advanced.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

I'm sure we'll get some comments.

SPEAKER_01 9:51

We don't care anymore. That's a part of being old. That's right. So I think we're gonna start doing a dance a day. Have you dance today? And Randy and I will be dancing too come song.

SPEAKER_00 10:02

I do have a dance I want to try, I keep trying to make myself do. It's too late. No, it's not. It's too late. People will still like it.

SPEAKER_01 10:09

It's too late because the trend is over. He's talking about the Bruno Mars.

SPEAKER_00 10:14

Yeah, but I can I can do that.

SPEAKER_01 10:15

It's too late.

SPEAKER_00 10:17

Fine. Okay, how many people want to see me dance to Bruno Mars and take my Austrian tank with me and play it as a guitar? Huh? You bet that's funny stuff. Keep your eye open.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

If one person says, please do that, Randy, we will do it. Yeah. But we've been trying to do it since the trend started out over a month ago, and Randy still hasn't.

SPEAKER_00 10:39

No, the dance is hard.

SPEAKER_01 10:42

Well then why do you want to do it if it's hard?

SPEAKER_00 10:45

I think it looks so stupid. It might want people to come to our thing.

SPEAKER_01 10:50

Did you ever go to clubs? Yeah. Okay, what was like the dance that everybody did?

SPEAKER_00 10:54

Oh, I can't remember.

SPEAKER_01 10:56

The hustle?

SPEAKER_00 10:57

Yeah, the hustle was one of them. Um, a lot of beey stuff. Lots of bee gees because Saturday Night Live or Saturday Night Fever? Yeah. A lot of that stuff.

SPEAKER_01 11:06

We couldn't dance like John Travolta.

SPEAKER_00 11:09

Oh, I tell you what, those guys out there dressed like them and everything, man. It was a trip. Old bell bottoms of the big old high boots.

SPEAKER_01 11:16

Polyester suits.

SPEAKER_00 11:17

Polyester suits. We'd walk out thinking we were so freaking hot, man. With those nylon shirts and shit.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

Well, you still got the jewelry on, but so that hasn't changed. I always said jewelry, but that's what we're gonna do. People have mentioned it more than once about dancing, so apparently there's something to it. So we're going to do a dance-a-day video.

SPEAKER_00 11:37

Yay.

SPEAKER_01 11:39

So, to the person that left the comment, I want to say thank you. Because even though it stung at first, it started a conversation that needed to happen. And I do believe your heart was in the right place. But here's what I hope everyone takes away from this. There's no right way to do this stage of your life. You can be doing your best and still look different from someone else. And that doesn't make you wrong, it makes you real. So we want to thank everyone for following and subscribing to Cheropee. It means a whole lot. We're growing into a pretty great community, and we humbly appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 12:18

Very much so.

SPEAKER_01 12:19

So wherever you are right now, keep going. In your way, at your pace, and whatever journey you are on, always remember to embrace your voice. See you next time.

SPEAKER_00 12:30

Thanks, guys. Take care. Thanks for listening to Sheropee with Sherry and Randy. Be sure to subscribe on YouTube and follow us wherever you get your podcasts. Have a great week.