Ep 27 All Chaps are Assless

The DCP format has officially collapsed into chaos. Em uncovers the terrifying truth that wombats are both perfect and somehow capable of killing animals by twerking. Günter launches a full-scale attack on the English language and Billie continues her lifelong mission to snort-laugh directly into the microphone.

⚠️ Warning: This episode contains inappropriate language incorrect grammar, aggressive wombat facts and repeated snorting. Listener discretion advised. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

This show is loud, unfiltered, and probably gonna get us into trouble. Enjoy. Billy, if this is recording, I love you.

SPEAKER_01 0:23

For all those listeners out there, that was a chicken twisty. Chicken twisty.

SPEAKER_03 0:33

We're trying to get a new lot of listeners. So I can hashtag was it ASMR? ASMR.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

I'm gonna hashtag ASMR because Emma's doing ASMR twisties.

SPEAKER_02 0:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 0:48

So should I do the introduction as ASMR introductions?

SPEAKER_01 0:51

Yes. I'd love that. Good.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

My introduction today will be parenthetical. Oh. No, I can't do it.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

I have to put the headphones on because I can't fucking hear you. All I'm heard was you saying pathetic. Did you say pathetic?

SPEAKER_00 1:04

I said rhubarb and sausages.

SPEAKER_01 1:05

Yeah, you said rhubarb and sausages. Okay, we'll be pathetic.

SPEAKER_00 1:14

Welcome back, Dream Cheesers. Uh my name is Gunther. I'm here with lovely Billy and the lovely Emma. My introduction today will be parenthetical, meaning, of course, that I use parentheses andor commas, but I run only really use those to explain parenthetical. So at the moment I mentioned parenthetical. I had not actually used any of them. So I was cl uh clairvoyantly parenthetical. Which feels oddly like a third cult.

SPEAKER_03 1:39

Clairvoyantly parenthetical. Is it parent?

SPEAKER_00 1:42

Paratical parenthetical. Parenthetical.

SPEAKER_03 1:45

Parenthesis. Yes. Okay. And I noticed, because in my head, when you said I'm going to do this parenthetically, I went, you didn't use any. But then of course I dropped it. Did when you were yes, okay. Okay, so you've got a new cult of um clairvoyant parentheticals.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Oh my dad's wanted. Parentheticals. Yes, I've seen him in the meetings.

SPEAKER_01 2:11

He loves, he loves parentheses. Parentheses. No, he he loves grammar and yeah, because he used to be a typesetter.

SPEAKER_03 2:20

And cults. Yes, he used to be a typesetter, so it was his big thing. Grammar and cults. Grammar and cults. Would you say that in the cult? Hi, my in the in the cult of um grammar, would you actually say hi? Is that problematic if he joins the family? Because then the plural and yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:42

Oh, is it then my interests and I? Oh not me and my interests.

SPEAKER_03 2:48

Well, apparently that's incorrect grammar. Me. No, my interests and I is incorrect.

SPEAKER_00 2:54

Is it I and my interests, me and So if it's a person, you have to say I last, but if it's n something like an interest, you have to say you first.

SPEAKER_04 3:02

What? Oh my grammar is terrible. I have my grammar. It's better to be Billy and I.

SPEAKER_00 3:07

Blah blah blah, right? Not I and Billy. I is in me and Billy, right?

SPEAKER_03 3:11

Yes. Billy and me, though, I believe, because it always sounds awkward. It sounds awkward to me, but I believe it's around pronoun and complex compound sentences. Jesus, Emma, you're so good at this shit. I'm terrible. No, I'm not. I that's probably wrong.

SPEAKER_00 3:25

Okay, well this is timingly then. Alright, timingly.

SPEAKER_03 3:27

Just opened his book. Early!

SPEAKER_01 3:29

He's breaking, he's breaking the routine. Ah, my god!

SPEAKER_02 3:41

Cannot compute Billy's head exploding. Sound effect in here.

SPEAKER_00 3:47

So it's just randomly that was connected with what you're saying. So the question for teachers, yes. Why impossible rather than an unpossible?

SPEAKER_03 3:55

Ah yes. That would go. I feel like again, are we having dejavu is everyone having deja vu? I think it's because of the prefix, and if you look at it in an etymological sense. Love that word. So it's all around the prefix structure in words.

SPEAKER_00 4:12

So where it came from originally.

SPEAKER_03 4:13

Correct.

SPEAKER_00 4:14

Great. That's that's unto resting.

SPEAKER_03 4:16

The Gunteresting. Did I tell you about my I got a a job at a a school and it was my first lot of reports at a school. And it's not my current school, it's my school before that. And um wealthy independent school. And I was really nervous because it was my first lot of reports, and we'd done a whole lot of things, and in my reports I was being fancy, and I so an author, I used the word um we've been learning about the um entomology of words.

SPEAKER_01 4:51

And the principal came back as the principal read all the reports and said, I love that your children help them in learning about the bugs of words. And I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, he wrote entomology instead of entomology. I'm like, oh my god, and I felt like the biggest dick. Yeah, that's it.

SPEAKER_00 5:12

Well we talk about bugs all the time in coding.

SPEAKER_01 5:14

We do, yeah, the bugs, but different units.

SPEAKER_00 5:16

We don't talk about the entomology of coding. And that actually would make a lot more sense.

SPEAKER_03 5:20

Yes, well there you go.

SPEAKER_00 5:20

In coding language.

SPEAKER_03 5:21

The entomology of coding. I want to describe the weather as incremental.

unknown 5:25

Incremental.

SPEAKER_01 5:29

Well, there are there are lots of things that I know that I've written incorrect like incorrectly and gotten pulled up on all the time. Uh uncorrectly, sorry. Sorry. Uncorrectly. Let's try and use. Miscorrectly. Misscorrectly.

SPEAKER_03 5:42

Yes, let's try and use the correct things. Discorrectly. Discorrectly. Discorrectly. Discorrectly. Non-correctly.

SPEAKER_01 5:50

Oh my god, this could go forever.

SPEAKER_03 5:53

Incorrectly. It really could go forever. You two are in a circuit loop of Yeah. Circuit loop. Circuit and a loop, yes. Oh that you know what that is? That's infinity. Oh, that's a MOBIS! Freaking Mobius strip! Mobius!

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Mobius strip, not a MOBA strip. Ever's gonna write that in their next report. The MOBIS strip. The MOBIS. And I'll read it.

SPEAKER_00 6:13

The entomology of the Mobus strip.

SPEAKER_01 6:14

The entomology of the MOBA strip.

SPEAKER_03 6:16

Just bugs. In Gunties. In Gunties.

SPEAKER_00 6:22

Let's not let Gunties cut on.

SPEAKER_03 6:24

It's already caught on. Hamish has got it out there. It's a thing. I love you, Pam. And um speaking of Gunties, you spent some hard-earned Gunties up at the supermarket. I did spent some hard-earned Gunties, and Emma is desperate, desperate, to try this. We talked about, if you have not listened to episode, I'm gonna say 24, our last episode prior to this one, which you notice that I'm not saying its name because I haven't named it yet. Um, we talked about a new taste sensation. Taste sensation of twisties and cheese, because cheese twisties, we were talking about um cubies, and then we were talking about how we can put things together to make even a better sensation. And so it had to be daffanoir, which is of course a really um creamy soft creamy um high thick, yeah, yeah, and it needs to be quite thick.

SPEAKER_00 7:25

Um and then triple brie or something right now.

SPEAKER_03 7:27

But we also talked about chicken twisties.

SPEAKER_00 7:29

Why have one brie when you can have it?

SPEAKER_03 7:31

So what is triple brie? Do we need to try the the cheese, the daffanoir and uh uh the twisties uh uh independently before we put the two twisties and the cheese together, or are you just going straight in Emma? I'm no I'm not going for I'm going for purely chicken purely going chicken twisty and daffanoir. Then twisties. Yes, and daffanoir. Yeah, and be scientific about that. Yes, that's what I said. So she's yes, definitely doing the the what do you call it? When you have the I don't know, the thing first that tells you the thing. Control thank you.

SPEAKER_00 8:09

The control control or a baseline.

SPEAKER_01 8:11

Alright, Emma.

SPEAKER_03 8:12

And I'm gonna record it because I can now put up video. Uh it's only taken me a year and a bit to work out um that I needed an app. Oh no, I don't want I don't want the page. I've got a face for podcasting. That's why I've chosen this medium. I'm not gonna film you. I'll film the film Gunther doing the actual building, the actual thing building. We're all a little bit. We're all a little bit Sunday morning, and so none of us are really um ready for what do you call it? Face. Face, face none of us are ready. None of us are ready for face. None of us are ready for face. Okay, but there it is there. There's our Billy, can I ask? Because you did pick up the old Tim Tam with Jack. Was that a subconscious because you're you're thinking cheese cracker combo in one? Did it extend then to chocolate cracker combo?

SPEAKER_01 9:02

Um, it kind of did, except that um I was sorry, I'm trying to film at the same time.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

I was um looking for, as I think I told you, Tim Tams. Oh. That is a new Tim Tam that is either sold out or is not here yet. And that is uh Tim Tams with Gunty, you're missing one.

SPEAKER_00 9:25

Which one am I missing?

SPEAKER_03 9:26

The one with both.

SPEAKER_00 9:27

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 9:28

Um, in that I'm looking for Tim T's sorry, looking for Tim Tams that had um iced Vovos. So it's an iced Vovo Tim Tam. But instead, this is a Jats one. And so it's instead of made of Tim Tam biscuits, it's made of Jats biscuits. So Hyrannosaurus Rex ham. Oh fuck off, I am too. Um it's uh salty. So it's a Tim Tam. Makes someone special. But without the chocolate biscuit, it's got a uh Jats, well it says Jats style, doesn't it, Emma? It doesn't say jats, it says I think it says jats inspired, which basically means it's a um a cracker with salt. Um but there's something about chocolate and salt, and you always do that. If I'm making a chocolate cake or doing anything with chocolate chocolate, I always put a bit of salt in. Your Rocky Road, your world famous Rocky Road. My world famous Rocky Road does actually um contain that looks good. It does contain salt. I think that we should all try simultaneously and give feedback. Oh my god, mine looks like what is Gunther tongue to mine. You're gonna be able to do it. I don't get all three. No, Em's gonna try all three and then we're gonna just try the. I'm just gonna take a photo of the channel. As Gunther did point out, this is a shit ton of cheese. Yeah. Um it is a shit ton of cheese. Just take a little bite, Em. Hang on, just take a bite. Okay. Okay, so Emma's now doing some more ASMR. And hang on, which one are you trying first? The chicken twisty with daffunnoir. This is a new flavour if you're listening to bees. I think the daffemoir overpowered the chicken. Ah, okay. Gunther's going for the both.

SPEAKER_00 11:10

I'm going for a higher ratio of twisty to cheese.

SPEAKER_03 11:12

Hang on, are you just eating the I'm I'm doing a combo. You've done the combo? Okay, I'm going in. You've gone in hard. I'm going in here. I'm just eating the twisted cheese. Do you know what?

SPEAKER_00 11:24

It's like the Mad Max 2 of twisties.

SPEAKER_03 11:27

I don't know what is it about. I love twisties, like I love normal twisties. What the fuck is it about chicken twisties? I love chicken twisties. Okay. I like the crunch and the cream. I like the crunch and the cream. What do you reckon, Em?

SPEAKER_00 11:51

The worst things you eat. Do you know what?

SPEAKER_03 11:52

The Daffemoir is really How can the Daffemoir be more overpowering than a Twistie? I need more twisties on mine. Can you put one more twisty on it? Give me more cheese twisty. Because the cheese twisties are higher in flavour. I thought the twisties, I thought the cheese was going to the daffemoir would overpower the twisty. Other way around. The twisty would overpower the daffony. Me too. But no, the daffonoir is pronounced. It tastes like it's a fish. It almost just tastes like a biscuit with daffunnoir. I think it it actually. I'm disappointed, but it increases the power of daffunoir.

SPEAKER_00 12:30

I've got to clean my palate with a nice gouda.

SPEAKER_03 12:32

If you now have a uh twisty, it's less flavorful. The twisty is less flavourful.

SPEAKER_00 12:43

What are those weird berries you you you have? And then they make everything taste sweet after you're talking about it. No, they're a I can't remember the name of them, but they're a thing. Oh. They change your receptors somewhere.

SPEAKER_03 12:54

What do you reckon, Em? Yeah, maybe you're right. This has been an unusual experiment. First it was the um publisher. The what do you call it? The science journal.

SPEAKER_00 13:07

Science journal.

SPEAKER_03 13:08

And I remember Em when I was saying I realized in my last episode that I was doing this a lot. And that as I was listening, I'm like, oh shit, Gunda's gonna hate that. Because it's paper towel and it's makes a quite a loud noise compared to tissues. And I was blowing my nose with a paper towel because it happened to be closer than the tissue. And is that when we all had collective? It was when we all had the collective noses because we were talking about noses and it made all our noses run. Because Gunda was talking about his sinus not rhinos.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

Rhino sinusinus.

SPEAKER_03 13:38

Rhino sinus rhino sinusous. That could be a seg into something that I had discovered. Love. Which is um one way to treat it, you mentioned was medication. Oh yes. Well, did you know that back in Victorian times, children's medication was often a roll the dice in terms of safety and fatality.

SPEAKER_00 14:03

Because just kind of experimenting.

SPEAKER_03 14:06

Because it contained alcohol and opiates. Yes, of course it can take alcohol. Such as laudenum and morphine. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:14

And a lot of cocaine, I think, in in the old days too.

SPEAKER_03 14:16

And so cocaine was quite the penascal. Because it was about knocking the child out. Actually knocking the child out, particularly for uh nannies who had lots of children in their charge. So they would knock them all out, making their job a little bit easier. And women that had to return to work. So again, going back to your discussion around female um behavioural expectation versus male, and um the women were but had to work, so they would knock the child out during the day. Um come back and have them awake. Oh my god. Come back and yep. You know what? That didn't stop in the odd days. I know that my mum did that to me in the 70s.

SPEAKER_00 14:57

Fanurgan.

SPEAKER_03 14:58

Fanergin. Yep. Furnurgan was it was the drug of choice for a lot of mums to uh get their child through the night. For whatever reason, if we were being um you know, naughty or thingy, they would give us a you know, little naughty, a little hit. I feel like I need to get Muggie online to uh Billy cried a lot.

SPEAKER_00 15:18

She only rarely use morphine, let's face it. That was that was a that was a special.

SPEAKER_03 15:23

I don't think this is true, Maggie. You Yeah, for a self, exactly. To to deal with you, young Billy. Um many included opiates even for seemingly mundane complaints such as colic and wind. Uh wind water heart um the planet is Captain Planet.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

Um the twins activate.

SPEAKER_03 15:46

In a complete English dispensatory, first published in 1718, a noted ap apothecarist apothecarianist said it was a very mischievous way some nurses have got of giving their children this medicine to make them sleep more for their own ease than anything else. By the mid-19th century the practice seemed to have reached epidemic proportions. Um especially among mercenary nurses accused of caring for numerous babies by drugging them with laudanum. Oh wow, laudanum was the big one, wasn't it? We don't use laudanum for things anymore, do they? One Manchester druggist admitted selling a half gallon of the market leader Godfrey's cordial and up to six gallons of a generic equivalent euphemistically called quietness each week. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 16:43

Like a bracing cup of quietness.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

Yes, we have a new medicine for you. It's called quietness.

SPEAKER_03 16:49

Take it for quietness. Poor old um Mary Cotton tried many times to stop giving her baby the opium-based Jeffrey's coil, but found that drugging her child was the only way to continue her low-paid work and afford food for the family. But also the baby would cry when they didn't have it anymore because they were having withdrawals. Yes. Oh my god. Three quarters of deaths, all deaths from opium occurred in children under five. One nine-month-old baby overdosed on four drops of laudanum. Four drops. But also, didn't they did you say cordial? Yes. They're giving it in cordial.

SPEAKER_00 17:28

Called Laudiel.

SPEAKER_03 17:29

Laudel. My dad. My cordial free laudeal cast to make the laudil.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

I really love best. Let's pick the puppies.

SPEAKER_00 17:42

Poppy Cordial. Damn.

SPEAKER_03 17:44

Big the puppies! Chasing the dragon again. So much chasing of the dragon. Then they had this insanely powerful drugs for teething as well. Oh yes. It's the omniscient God never intended that nearly half of the babies born in this country should die as they now do before. They are five years of old, careless, poisonous, white from careless, poisonous white calami powders, and a general ignorance of simple safe remedies to cure their particular diseases. You're saying they had things in calamine lotion. Uh well it was calamite, wasn't it? Calumel. C O L A C A L O M E L. Surely it's got to be from the similar thing as calamine lotion. And then this one is really hard to do.

SPEAKER_00 18:34

Did Mary Poppins approve it?

SPEAKER_03 18:36

A spoonful of laudanum makes the messing go down. Makes the laudanum go down. So then there was Mrs. Winslow's soothing syrup. It features a buxom woman on the front that's the archetype of Kara's but it used Oh, there you go, the founder's persona as an old and experienced nurse to portray a trusted homely product advertised as perfectly harmless and very pleasant to taste. It originally contained alcohol and morphine. And so many children died or fell into comas.

SPEAKER_00 19:17

Yeah, but the parents were having a ball at that time.

SPEAKER_03 19:19

Oh my god. And isn't but what's really, really sad is that we can't get it now. Yes. Like, where do we get it now? No, it's they just didn't there was no like number one, there was no telling what was in it. Like, so they didn't know, but often the doctors didn't know, they just gave it out. But also they would a lot of these people who took it were really uneducated. So they would go, they're still crying, we'll give them more. Or you know, they just but also essential for working and supporting and bringing in coming. Oh gee, that's made my child quiet while they're in a coma. But yeah, yeah, I've been able to work for four days straight now. They they haven't woken up. Woohoo! It's like that's so sad. That's sad.

SPEAKER_00 20:02

I mean they're they're too young to send them down mine before they're five, right? So you know they had it like a year or two more and if had they hung up.

SPEAKER_03 20:09

Or up the chimney, yeah. But it's it's so awkward pre-mining. Up.

unknown 20:15

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 20:15

No, down. It depends if you're glass half full or chimney half empty. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:21

Well, I haven't had something relevant to that.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

Oh, of course you do. Um Gunter's book is very relevant. When hang on, Gunther, I have something to ask you. Okay. What's in the book? What's in the book? Another breakdown of format breaking news.

SPEAKER_00 20:42

To fight the growing slinky epidemic, the government has ordered serious research into stairs that only go up.

SPEAKER_02 20:50

Bodom.

SPEAKER_03 20:51

Shh.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

Did you write that or did did um No, I wrote that. Did Josh? I should have known.

SPEAKER_00 20:58

Of course I've read that.

SPEAKER_01 20:59

Guntu, what are your things?

SPEAKER_00 21:00

How are we coming along with that?

SPEAKER_01 21:01

Is it because your dad jokes get worse as you get older? Is that the what's meant to happen? The dad jokes get worse as they get older.

SPEAKER_03 21:08

Weather, it's incremental. Uncremental? Um incremental. Emma, can you pass the chicken twisty? See, now I'm addicted. It's the salt, it's the laudanum. You want another bad dad joke? Yes. Yes, give us another bad dad joke while we're on a roll.

SPEAKER_00 21:29

As you know, I am into Lego philosophy. Yes. I have achieved inner pieces.

SPEAKER_03 21:33

Oh, that's very cute. Inner pieces. I like that. I like that too. Oh, couldn't you may want to turn the fly killer off while you're sitting there?

SPEAKER_04 21:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:42

Never. Um and speaking of flies, this is not related. The people who danced themselves to death. In the in 1518, a dance plague saw citizens of French city, yes, Strasbourg, reportedly dancing uncontrollably for days on end with fatal results. It's a bizarre event that continues to fascinate artists. That's where we got MDMA for the Hans Christian Anderson tale. But obviously, based on twelve slippers.

SPEAKER_00 22:17

No.

SPEAKER_03 22:18

But is it a the red slippers? The red slippers is based on that.

SPEAKER_00 22:21

Ah, okay. Well, or maybe this is possibly a buffy episode.

SPEAKER_03 22:24

Yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 22:26

So um the one with the singing.

SPEAKER_03 22:27

You do you reckon they were on some some kind of thing? Or is it a psychological phenomena? You know, that can sometimes be reported. Which also has um surely it's a drug thing.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

Implications for that.

SPEAKER_03 22:41

What in 1518? What? Of course there were drugs around 1518. Really? Yeah. Like all good plague stories, this one begins with omens. A star streaks across the sky, fields floods, fields flood, extreme cold is followed by extreme heat, which is followed inevitably by extreme hunger. Hunger? Hunger, I mean. And then yeah. A woman called Frau Trophia steps into a square and begins to dance.

SPEAKER_00 23:09

And then everyone else.

SPEAKER_02 23:13

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:20

What's that? The what's the becoming word? Oh, I can't think. Break it on. Coming out of a um like a butterfly. Yeah, emergence kind of thing. Yes, yeah, metamorphosis. The emergence of of party drugs.

SPEAKER_03 23:34

Well, also, though.

SPEAKER_00 23:35

Could be cordyceps.

SPEAKER_03 23:36

Is that oh the mushrooms growing and controlling? But also, you know what it could be, where the term dad's craze. Yeah. Um so she uh sounds like that's a little bit made up. No, it's true. No.

SPEAKER_00 23:52

What are your news sources?

SPEAKER_03 23:53

At first, the BBC, the bibs. It's from the bibs. At first, those around her only watch. Curiosity piqued. They watch a woman who will not cannot stop. Can't stop, won't stop. That's what she says. She dances for nearly a week. Well, occasionally by exhaustion. Did she stop doo poo eat? Doo poo. I love that that's your first. When you jump up and down and do that, it makes your bowels move.

SPEAKER_00 24:17

Maybe she was waltzing.

SPEAKER_03 24:18

By August there will be hundreds. Uh a poem from a contemporary chronicle describes women and men who dance and hop in the pu public market in alleys and streets dan night until the sickness finally stops. There's some photos here as well for you, Billy. Um hang on, when?

SPEAKER_00 24:35

From 1580.

SPEAKER_03 24:37

Before the camera was invented. There's some illustrations, Billy.

SPEAKER_00 24:43

There's an oil painting. They're a bit blurry.

SPEAKER_03 24:50

Oh There's show me them. Sorry, my mouth full of chicken twist. The idea is called choriomania, as the phenomenon was later done. I just don't I don't know what to make of that.

SPEAKER_00 25:08

It sounds wrong, doesn't it?

SPEAKER_03 25:09

It sounds like a rave. Like true, it's true. There must have been on mushrooms or something. Like there must have been something.

SPEAKER_00 25:15

Something might have got in the water.

SPEAKER_03 25:16

Yeah, must have been something in the water. Like you just don't have people joining in who in that time needed to work, needed to do stuff to survive.

SPEAKER_00 25:26

I'd love we're in the future now where we don't need to work.

SPEAKER_03 25:29

No, back then, who who would have gone? I can't take a day off because I can't, I you know, I need to drug my kids and go to work.

SPEAKER_01 25:38

Wait a minute. I'm gonna take the drugs myself and dance all day. Woo, woo, woo, woo!

SPEAKER_00 25:44

And you know Okay, so this is after they've they've worked out the drugging band. Where did the music come? So now they're going, oh, we've got this huge overdose of drugs lying around. What are we gonna do with them? Crocodile rock on the harpsichord.

SPEAKER_03 26:03

I'm just also picturing. Picturing people going to bed. Okay, morning. Before I go to work, drag the kids. But it it says Leech, leech, leech. Mom, I'm feeling much better. No, you're not. I don't need the medicine. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. Uncontrollable dance has a bewitching effect on those who contemplate it. One only has to think of the popular hands, Christian Anderson. Fairy tales. Exactly. The red shoes. There you go. Yeah. Um I just ultimately oh boo. I didn't read further. What did it say? Ultimately, the story of surreal summer of a surreal summer in Strasbourg is just that a story. Oh boo!

SPEAKER_00 26:46

Deep dive, my ass. You didn't read the end of the article.

SPEAKER_03 26:49

I didn't, because it says that beyond Frau Treffo is named as the instigator in several uh dance plagues. Beyond that, the details begin to diverge. I want to start a dance plague. Instead of COVID, let's have a dance plague. Where we all have to stay home and just dance. What is it? A portrait. Oh flash mobs, yeah, flash mobs. A portrait is drawn. Sorry, I'm just looking at the birds of returned to the um Capistrana? To the backyard. Oh. Alright, well, you're right. It was multiple pages, and I just could not be asked reading that many. I just was like, M. I'm starting to question your powers of defense. Because, you know, this was a it was a faux deep dive. It was a shallow dive that I tried to mask as M M ran out of branch and she had to come back to the surface.

SPEAKER_00 27:38

You just had your AD that.

SPEAKER_03 27:39

Yeah, no D D. No D D. Exactly. Plus, I had some Laudanum earlier on. That was million bit snippy. This one is a short dive. No. A short dive with verification because it is from C S I R O. Okay. Okay. Do not.

SPEAKER_01 28:11

Yes. Everyone in my head's bugly when they are. They just play it on a bazooka.

SPEAKER_00 28:15

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 28:16

Sorry, Em. Uh so the C S I Row have got mathematical proof wombats are perfect.

SPEAKER_01 28:23

Oh, I'm a wombat. Because it's a bat. Isn't that what a woman?

SPEAKER_03 28:31

Billy, please bring it down. Why must she bring it down? Uh classically. Didn't you have that saying? I didn't even. She's a wombat. She eats roots and leaves. Is that did people use that to describe you, Billy? No. No. No. Never. I didn't have anything. And you never left. Don't you bet. Um, so it turns out wombats are the perfect fit for the golden ratio. While it may look cute and fluffy, a wombat's bum is their biggest weapon. They're made up of four fused plates surrounded by cartilage, fat, skin, and fur. They can use their bum to block or even potentially to crush the skulls of predators against the entrance of their burrow. Ah, I fucking love that. It's a dinosaur.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

So it doesn't matter. Well, that's a dinosaur. Does that mean you have to get the predator's head in your bum first?

SPEAKER_01 29:25

It's got a little smiley face, a little something going in. It's got a little, isn't it's butt look like a like a nut or something that's gonna go in the butt? Like a nut.

SPEAKER_03 29:36

I'm doing dinosaur hair so its head's gonna go in the butt so that we can crush it. Billy, if the person that detects your neighbours comes back, you can crush your buttons.

SPEAKER_01 29:48

I just have to put a nut in there. Wombat pounds.

SPEAKER_03 29:54

But I need four. I need four I didn't you have to join me. I need four plates. Oh yeah, because you've got two technically two butt cheeks. We've got two buttons.

SPEAKER_00 30:05

So you're saying that wombats have four butt cheeks.

SPEAKER_03 30:07

Four buttons. Plates. Plates. So I'm I'm actually, do wombats have butt cracks? Have we looked at this before? No. I haven't looked at a wombat's butt crack before. I'm sure you have, Em. Why am I deja vuing so hard? But they've they've got a lot of people. Because we've talked about animals and butts and things for a long time. I feel like um if you What do you mean by plates? Would you rather Thanos' gall? A silver butt. A silver little wombat butt. I think I prefer the silver little wombat butt. What is the most powerful of the two? One of the glitter ups.

SPEAKER_00 30:40

Well, try to click with a butt. That would be interesting.

SPEAKER_03 30:43

The wombat could defeat Thanos with its butt.

SPEAKER_00 30:46

You reckon?

SPEAKER_03 30:47

If it can get it Apparently, I'm gonna just need to search up wombat. Wombat butt plates.

SPEAKER_00 30:53

Tiger versus wombat.

SPEAKER_03 30:56

Wombat bottoms. Bear versus a spacemat. Type in do wombats have butt cracks. Wombat butts. Oh, there you go. It is a defensive weapon. But with a crack.

SPEAKER_00 31:06

People have said that about my butt.

SPEAKER_03 31:10

It's got four cartilage-based plates. Fat and thick skin creating a rock hard shield. Oh, butt shield. Yeah, I love it. Butt shield.

SPEAKER_04 31:21

Activate.

SPEAKER_03 31:21

Activate. But but do they have butt crack got one of those? Do they have a butt crack? Okay. They've got skull crushing power. It says. That's what it says. Evolution is just weird, right? Oh, but you know what's the best thing about it? I'm I'm just jumping in on M's wombat here. Um for their mating rituals, the butt is used for flirting. They bite each other's rumps during a high speed chase. High speed for a wombat. And they bite each other's rumps. No, no, some wombats can get really fast, up to 30 kilometres, I'm sure.

SPEAKER_00 31:56

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 31:56

Yeah, but over short periods not extended. Yes, they do have a butt crack.

SPEAKER_00 32:00

Printer's not marathoners, but that's a they do have a butt crack.

SPEAKER_03 32:03

They do? Yeah, I'm gonna show you a photo. Well I think that's a um oh no, it's a woman. I'm like, what the fuck is that?

SPEAKER_01 32:11

It's a pouch and a and a baby coming out of the pouch. Because I'm like, because of course they have a backward pouch.

SPEAKER_03 32:17

Oh, I am so yeah, I'm just confused and briefly. I was like going, what the that's that would scare me as a predator. Like is that what their butt looks like? A little baby wombat? Yes, there you go. I was correct. They can reach up to 40 kilometres. Wow. But again, over short distances. Now I'm picturing, you know, um the British Wombat Racing. The British show, top, top, top gear, top gear. Top top wombat. Top wombat. And then you can oh, then it says what animal kills predators by twerking. The wombat will use its butt to crush. Wombat. Wombat invented twerking. I love it. And then there is a YouTube wombats can twerk predators to death. Cause of death twerking. Oh, yeah. So apparently. Oh. Wombats use their butts to block their burrows, as you said, Em. Yeah. So the first thing a fox would see is a wombat's butt as it goes in. There you go. And it and it crushes nipping and kicking. So yeah, they they observe female wombats bum biting and kicking their perspective mates. That's how you got them. It's an uh here we go. Here we go. As part of their research, she also needed to extract hormone concentrations from the wombat's urine, so she developed an important non-evasive technique, tickling their bums hard. This is a person doing research on them. Tickling their butt to make them is that research, or is that just a bit of a kind of a wombat's reproduction is really aggressive, apparently. Male wombats chase the females biting their bums, you say, digging in their claws. Wow, it also sounds really intense. Oh, I bet they do. Oh, it's so cute. They bite each other and run away and try and catch each other. I really think that's cute. It is cute, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00 34:11

So I what about the golden mean?

SPEAKER_03 34:12

Yeah, sorry, what's with the golden triangle thing? Um, it just has that as a picture. Dude, does that make sense? Oh, we'll put it on the Oh, that's a Figuraci, Fibonacci sequence. Yeah. We'll put that on the um show notes. Aha! And in the Fibonacci. Yes, so I've crept into Billy's territory because I've got it. And I also have another one. This is an older article from The Guardian. Um Trevor the Lonely Duck gets a tiny island of N-I-U-E in a flap. So this is an island of New Zealand. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 34:48

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 34:49

Um, and it's a little remote Pacific atoll. Oh, yeah. Yep, just near Auckland. Well, near, I said, three and a half hours away. It only has 1,600 humans. And then this lone duck arrived called Trevor. And he delighted Logan. Was he called Trevor or did they call him Trevor? The speaker of the House of Reps in New Zealand called him Trevor. And he became a celebrity. Um people dropped by with food and to top up the puddle that Trevor lives in. He lives in a little puddle. He lives in a little puddle. And he's only a little guy. He's so happy. It says no one could believe that a duck could fly that far. There's conjecture that he could have stowed away on a yacht, but I think that's less likely. It's part of the mystery. And could he have swamp? Well, it lacks the wetlands and ponds that are the natural habitat. So Trevor has decided to make do with a little puddle alongside a track near the airport. So perhaps he flew in on a plane.

SPEAKER_01 35:49

What happens when it gets?

SPEAKER_00 35:51

That usually doesn't work out well, by the way, for ducks.

SPEAKER_03 35:53

No, it doesn't. Puddles evaporate. People have done their research and they bring uh they they used to do the wrong thing and bring in baguettes. Oh no, no bread, no baguettes. That was a quite fancy baguette, not a loaf of the old Coles bread. No, they were bringing baguettes. But now they bring in more nutritious peas, corn, oats, and rice. Um and the former New Zealand High Commissioner even visits to leave Bokchoy, which seems very specific.

SPEAKER_00 36:21

Um people were considering The Prime Minister really doesn't like Bokchoy. They got left lots left over bokchoy.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

And so everybody was very receptive and inclusive towards him. But then sadly, I I tried to follow up because I knew I wanted to do a proper dog. And we always ask what happened to him. I unfortunately got eaten by no dogs a year later. Oh those fuckers with their dogs. And you know, New Zealand's they're pretty good with their islands of their atolls because they keep um islands free of um like rodents and rodents and specifically possums and stuff. Because they try and get their wildlife, like their native wildlife, especially the um the kiwis and stuff. Yeah. Um so they they make sure that their islands are free of um rats and things. Yeah. Well, little what was his name? Trevor Burrus Trevor. So he had he had a really bad condolences, Trevor. I know.

SPEAKER_00 37:25

Trevor's family.

SPEAKER_03 37:26

Trevor's family. They mourned. Yeah, they ended up um dubbing him the world's loneliest duck. Oh, he wasn't lonely, he had people. He had people, but he didn't have any other he was the only bird of his kind on in the village. Um is that where that skit came from? Well, but uh I mean he had friends in high places because he had the former high commissioner, yeah. He also had the speaker for the house, yeah, but then um the chamber of commerce chief of Nui, or however you pronounce that, he actually was the one behind Trevor's Facebook page. So Trevor had a Facebook page. He had his own Facebook page. He had a following. Um but there I like this comment from him. Um he showed up in January last year after a big storm. We think he flew or blue here. Ah, blue! That makes sense. Blue. Getting blown there in a big storm. He got he got he's flying and then just got an extra. And then he was named after a local politician. So he's got he had all the markings of a successful life, but unfortunately. Why the hell didn't they keep those dogs away from him? Well I know. Let's let's just find out. Um put a fence around his puddle. Well, a cage or something around his puddle. Actually, you know what did happen? What he became friends with a rooster, a chicken, and a um a week. I was gonna say researching this list. And they went on many, many an adventure in a giant peach. Well then the person who used to go top up Trevor's puddle and bring him food said the rooster, chicken, and weaker were looking a little forlorn today, wandering around near the dry puddle. It never needs to be filmed because Trevor's sad. That is very silence in Parliament for silence. No, I made that up. I was in, I was all in M. I was all in after you doubted the dancing plague, and it turned out rightly so.

SPEAKER_04 39:34

Very true.

SPEAKER_03 39:35

Very true. That's me though. No, this is real, it's from the PPC. Keep reading. This is not true. Oh, I didn't read that part. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:45

There was a technical journal that um released a whole bunch of like 10,000 articles or something like this. We're all made-up articles, and they didn't flag them as made-up articles.

SPEAKER_01 39:53

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_00 39:54

Um isn't that illegal these days? And they had to do lots of um retractions and things like this. But they were doing faux studies of things and publishing them as kind of looking like real studies for people who were like, you can do that even more these days.

SPEAKER_03 40:07

Yeah, wow.

SPEAKER_00 40:08

Yeah, very, very dodgy.

SPEAKER_03 40:10

That's why did they do that?

SPEAKER_00 40:12

I think they wanted content.

SPEAKER_03 40:15

Hey, good. Not only do you have a blue book on the table today, you have a um magazine opened to a page on the table today. You know, it's in front of you.

SPEAKER_00 40:22

Yeah, the double magazines. I got double magazines. Oh my god. Well, I was reading this this morning.

SPEAKER_03 40:29

Double magazines, double, but I haven't quite summarised it probably yet. Gunter reads only two magazines, and they are New Scientist and what's the other one? What not to wear? Something No, the other one's a um uh is it QFF something? I don't know. Q effect. No, it's like a multiple letter thing.

SPEAKER_04 40:48

IEEE.

SPEAKER_03 40:49

IEEE.

SPEAKER_01 40:50

There you go. IEEE, see your multiple letter thing. Yeah, fuck, that's a word. I know. Shut up, Emma. I've made her day. I have made Emma's day. She is in prayer mode, sitting there wedding herself. Because I've said Shut up! I realize what I said.

SPEAKER_03 41:08

Multiple letter thing. Uh for five points word. I just to make everyone feel better, I am out of the classroom.

SPEAKER_01 41:18

I'm not teaching a class at the moment. I'm no longer teaching, but I do teach spelling. So I can learn.

SPEAKER_03 41:30

So I can learn. Yes. I learn something new every day. Every day. Every day I learn something new. Oh, good to put one away. Okay. What what IEEE, what does IEEE stand for, Gunter?

SPEAKER_00 41:40

Uh yeah, it's a good question.

SPEAKER_03 41:41

The international It's an engineering.

SPEAKER_00 41:44

Oh, there you go.

SPEAKER_03 41:44

IEEE Spectrum.

SPEAKER_00 41:46

Yeah. But there's a set section here on Hendrix and how he kind of invented, or you know, his engineers kind of invented. I think Jimi Hendrix. Yeah, Jimi Hendrix. Um how they invented a lot of the sort of distortion stuff that was going on at the time.

SPEAKER_02 42:00

Oh, yeah. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 42:02

Purple Hays was absolutely groundbreaking in certain ways. And it was very specific technology that allowed that to happen.

SPEAKER_03 42:12

Billy's doing more tyrannous. He wanted to make me a cheese thing and he just picked up. What do you mean by make me a cheese thing? I waved my hand towards the thing. But then you also shooed him away. I saw him look at you critically, and then you you reversed your hand. I didn't shoe anything. And he was left feeling like the chicken and the weaker and the root. Because it's the book. I need to eat my noisy noisy thing. My noisy feelings. I need to eat my feelings, yeah. Fuck you.

SPEAKER_00 42:45

So I actually had some follow-up bits to um the the um uninteresting uh uninteresting um one that we we did on the book.

SPEAKER_03 42:52

Oh the unin un in uninteresting.

SPEAKER_00 42:55

The imp impossible rather than unpossible. That's unteresting. Um so uh the follow-on question is why misbehave instead of unbehave?

SPEAKER_03 43:05

Yes, well, a misinformation miss. So if you again look at the preface, a miss would be an um an a link etymological link to Greek. Miss being the Greek for blah blah or the Latin for why that instead of non or yeah, so so if there is a miss universe, what do you wear to an ununiverse? Oh, unaffordable.

SPEAKER_00 43:31

Well you could. I've come up with the unbikini.

SPEAKER_03 43:33

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 43:34

Right, which is like a onesie, but just with the boobs and groin cut out.

SPEAKER_03 43:38

Oh my god, actually that reminds me. My I think Kim Kardashian made that Kanye. When my auntie Susie came to visit, so she's in her 70s, she's like, Oh, I've got a nice tankini for cans, but I was like, no. I was like, no, you don't. I was like, no, you don't, and she goes, yeah. And I was picturing the Borat man. Tankini. But the tanchini is actually very respectful. No, it's a tank top with the little boy-legged shorts. But I was like, oh my god, she's going to wear a mankini. And that just reminded me of bikini.

SPEAKER_00 44:08

See what we should actually invent is a full tan.

SPEAKER_03 44:11

Hang on, so what's a kini? Kini must be something. Man kini. If you have a man kini and a and a big tiny. I can only tell you what an unkini is. Yes, yes. Which is a bikini weenie. Yellow poker, unbikini. Unbikini. That's she wanted to the Miss Universe.

SPEAKER_00 44:32

Ununiverse.

SPEAKER_03 44:33

Ununiverse.

SPEAKER_00 44:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:34

Miss Ununiverse. Or just ununiverse. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 44:37

So why dystopian rather than Untopian? Yes. Following the same theme. Because Dystopian has been done to death. My next movie will be Untopian. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 44:46

Kind of like Unent.

SPEAKER_00 44:51

Kind of like Mad Max 2. But the uncostumes are really gonna challenge the senses.

SPEAKER_04 44:58

Uncostumes.

SPEAKER_00 44:59

Yeah, because you know Mad Max 2 costumes, imagine them as uncostumes. Yes. Oh well they already were uncostumes. Unkinies.

SPEAKER_03 45:05

I think they already were uncostumes because they all had no butts to them and stuff. No, but I'm just thinking people wearing normal clothes. That's an uncostume. You've seen Mad Max 2.

SPEAKER_00 45:15

Think about what Mad Max 2 wears and then it take all the bits that they're wearing away and put clothes on the rest of them.

SPEAKER_03 45:20

Have you seen Mad Max 2? A long time. Because it's very um SM. It's very SM. They wear the chaps, you know, Arsless chaps and things like that.

SPEAKER_00 45:30

All chaps are ass.

SPEAKER_03 45:31

All chaps are arsless. Thank you, Gunther. Oh, all chaps are arsless. Thank you, Gunther for sharing.

SPEAKER_00 45:35

Otherwise, they're just pants.

SPEAKER_03 45:36

Oh my god, there's our episode name. All chaps are all chaps are arsless. Right, thank you. I'm just writing that down. That's probably the wisest thing you've ever said to me.

SPEAKER_00 45:49

Such high praise.

unknown 45:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 45:52

Is that when memical men will call chaps? Why are men called chaps then? Because you're assless. Chapies.

SPEAKER_00 46:02

No wombats here.

SPEAKER_03 46:04

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 46:05

Oh. Good link. Continue. Continue.

SPEAKER_00 46:10

I do have more in the book.

SPEAKER_02 46:11

More in the book. I have a weird poem.

SPEAKER_00 46:13

Um, uh I have microplastics in my brain, as we know. Yes, yes. Yes, you do. We all do. We all do. So does that make us recyclable? Yes. Are we worth 10 cents in Adelaide?

SPEAKER_03 46:26

Well, and Melbourne now. Melbourne now. You could argue that organ donor is recycling.

SPEAKER_00 46:33

Yes. Couldn't we always argue argue that?

SPEAKER_03 46:36

Yes. And argue it. Argue, arg me.

SPEAKER_00 46:46

Well, if you want to do it by yourself, it's an arg me, right?

SPEAKER_03 46:48

An arg me. I'm going to argue with myself. Yes. An argument. Oh, that's hard to say.

SPEAKER_00 46:57

Argument. Argument. Fuck.

unknown 46:59

That's fucked.

SPEAKER_03 47:02

Readership poem.

SPEAKER_00 47:03

Is that a B or something?

SPEAKER_01 47:04

Oh, have you got a poem?

SPEAKER_00 47:05

No, no. Oh, I do have a poem. Yes, I've got I've got a poem.

SPEAKER_01 47:08

You had a big long poem.

SPEAKER_00 47:09

I had a big long poem.

SPEAKER_03 47:10

Not read us the big long poem.

SPEAKER_01 47:12

Sorry. Please read us the big long poem.

SPEAKER_03 47:15

I know, Billy. And I'll edit it in post. Because I was feeling bad last night about making up the song Billy is gross, but now to be honest, good you bought it to look. Emma doesn't have a theme song for her little deep dive segment. We need to think of one. Shallow dive as it's been exposed to beach.

SPEAKER_01 47:38

Deep diving. Um dive. Deep diving. No, that's too nice.

SPEAKER_03 47:47

What about deep diving deserves a quiet night? You know. Oh. Yeah. R E M. I don't know R E M. I mean, I know R E M, but I don't know that song. R E M.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

I don't R-E-M. These guys have far more example.

SPEAKER_00 48:02

I've seen your sleep tracker.

SPEAKER_03 48:04

No, very, very true. I don't R E M. I don't R E M. Okay, poem. Please, poem.

SPEAKER_00 48:09

Poem. This is a bit of a thinker.

SPEAKER_03 48:11

Okay. Oh. Okay, wait, wait, wait.

SPEAKER_00 48:13

You ready for it? Okay, gotta get my brain ready.

SPEAKER_03 48:16

A bit of a thinker. Ms. in thinking mode. Mm-hmm. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 48:19

I screamed until I was horse, so I could gallop away from the madness. But madness followed. It would not let me be. So I ate the horse. The first half was easy.

SPEAKER_03 48:31

So personification. You've got personification in there. You've got but why was the first half? First half of the horse? Okay, it's can you explain? It will have a meaning. It will have a meaning. Okay, okay, okay. Let's go again. Read it again. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 48:46

I screamed until I was horse.

SPEAKER_03 48:48

Okay, so you screamed until you were horse.

SPEAKER_00 48:50

So I could gallop away from the madness.

SPEAKER_03 48:52

Love that.

SPEAKER_00 48:52

But madness followed. It would not let me be. So I ate the horse. The first half was easy.

SPEAKER_03 48:59

First horse? Were you eating the hoarseness of your voice?

SPEAKER_00 49:03

Well, that's the that's part of the, you know, entendre or whatever call those things, right? I have become horse.

SPEAKER_01 49:11

Yes. I am the horse.

SPEAKER_00 49:13

You are the first half was easy.

SPEAKER_03 49:16

Because then you couldn't eat yourself when you were just a mouth.

SPEAKER_00 49:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 49:20

Yes. A mouth cannot eat itself. All chaps are easy.

SPEAKER_00 49:22

Well, once you get up to your sort of groin and stomach area, it becomes very much harder to all chaps are assless. Eat yourself. And partly I can't bend that far. But you know.

SPEAKER_03 49:31

Now that's feeling rude. It went from feeling profound to rude very quickly. With his hands, he he was like pointing to his penis. And then Mellon has lost it, and so is Punta. Is he going to eat your face? You want to start doing bugs and looking down at the I can't reach her.

SPEAKER_01 50:06

I know you've tried. Please just don't invent it.

SPEAKER_00 50:08

The opposite of a male. That's why we invented yoga.

SPEAKER_01 50:15

I love that poem. It's very good. I like it a lot.

SPEAKER_03 50:18

Oh, new website section, Gunther's poems. Oh no. No. Poetry Corner. No. No. Yes, no, that just goes in random shit. Poetry Pinata. No, it just goes in random shit. Poetry pinata. We'll tag and then you click on it, and little bits of poems fall out like confetti.

SPEAKER_01 50:34

That'll take Dempsey another year to take it.

SPEAKER_00 50:37

It falls out as confetti. It'll take Dempsey another year to make your stick them together to find the poem.

SPEAKER_01 50:43

Oh, Gunter.

SPEAKER_00 50:44

It's like a jigsaw poem.

SPEAKER_03 50:46

Every time you go on the site, you get another piece. Remember when I um when I used my sister's cane? Blind cane to burst a pinata at my mine adventures in Garden. So sensitive of you. I'd missed my cane because it wasn't working with the stick we had. And then the bottom part of the cane flew off. And everyone was shocked the good bit that you need. To navigate the world. But she told me to use it. Yeah. But anyway, sure she did. It's by the by. But I think she meant fold it up and use it as one solid thing. Oh, like as a mallet. Yeah. Rather than as a tiny little flimsy stick thing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 51:33

Sorry.

SPEAKER_00 51:37

I must have missed it. Look at every face.

SPEAKER_01 51:40

I don't know. It's stupid. We girls have had a bit of a morning. We've had a morning. We've had a morning. Oh, we need to laugh. She said tiny floaty little stupid.

SPEAKER_00 51:51

And looked at me.

SPEAKER_01 51:53

Look in your direction. And it's like when she says German and looks in your direction. Oh you know.

SPEAKER_00 52:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 52:04

Another poem?

SPEAKER_00 52:06

Sure, another poem. This one's far more meaningful. In the cups. And I think it will it'll make much more sense after that last comment. I want to be buried with my family.

SPEAKER_01 52:20

No.

SPEAKER_00 52:20

But we disagree on the timing. That's okay. I do the cooking.

SPEAKER_03 52:25

That's awesome! And you Margie joke around there for dinner. Yeah. No mushroom. That's very good. Mushroom Wellington for me, thanks. That's really clever. I like that. I could see that also on a card or a. And that's a that's a little short one, so that wouldn't take too long to fall down as confetti. Yes. Yeah. I know. I I can we just get the website up first before we start with. We've got to know we start adding. We start stuffing. We're starting adding. Okay, Dempse, I know you don't listen, but now we've got new jobs for you. Hey, can I give a little update why we're doing that? Please. I did say last time that I would check on QB's, our little our friends, our cheese friends. Um we do actually have QBs on the table as we speak. So QB's, of course, just as a reminder, is QB's Crunchy Cheese. They are a New Zealand, in fact, a Nelson-based company. Um, they're New Zealand's original crunchy cheese snack. Um, 100% New Zealand cheese, as they're made in Nelson. We've met them. Lovely, lovely people. Um, perfect for platters and hiking in gym bags. And um hiking in a gym bag. Hiking with a gym bag.

SPEAKER_01 53:34

Um but we were trying to find out if they've made um their biscuits because they were looking at making them into biscuits, but they haven't made biscuits, but they have made crunchy cheese dipsticks.

SPEAKER_03 53:47

Oh yes, I'm just gonna show you well I'll put a photo in the show notes. Yeah, look. Cool.

SPEAKER_01 53:54

So you dip them into uh like into your dips.

SPEAKER_00 53:58

Or like a homage or something.

SPEAKER_01 53:59

Yeah, like a hummetic. That is a really cool idea.

SPEAKER_03 54:02

I like that. And very I I'm not sure because we haven't had these. I might get um Mara. Mara to to send us a packet of the crunchy cheese sticks because my sister lives in Nelson where these are made. Um can you just take a moment crunchy cheese sticks? Yes, it's a lot. It's a lot of a lot of excesses. And if you look at them like they look kind of similar, but I think that that would work better. Because we talked about the fact that they do sometimes get a little bit stuck to the roof of your mouth. But with a dip or something with it, I think that they would be good. Cheesy flavour combo as well. Yeah, yeah, I think I think that would work. So um Marzipan, if you can um send us a pack, go to the uh Nelson Market, because we know that they are at Nelson Market, and for all of you listeners in Nelson, um, which is Ma and Maddie and Justin and Ollie. Um, if one of you can go to Nelson Market and get us a packet of crunchy cheese sticks. QBies, you gotta start with QBies. Oh, yeah. QB cheese, crunchy cheese sticks. They are so clever because they are new. QB. Yeah. Um what does QB stand for, do you reckon? Do we know? What does QB stand for? I'm gonna have to try and find out uh about us. Let's have a look on there. Uh QBies, QB, QB, QB. It doesn't say all right. It's a great Kiwi snack off. And um they selected they were selected uh as the winner, and as we said, they have been on board um Air New Zealand for a while now. Excellent. So Charlotte had some yesterday. Oh, yeah. What did Charci think? Yes, enjoy it. Yeah, uh nationally.

SPEAKER_00 55:52

They they sort of promote their own little products and it's just a lot of people.

SPEAKER_03 55:54

They are really good thing and on Air New Zealand, which is just saying they the New Air New Zealand uh ran a competition called the Great Kiwi Snack Off to s to um uh put a New Zealand snack on their planes, and they won. Oh, cool. Yeah, so yes, um pretty cool.

SPEAKER_00 56:16

While we're on cheese, I have a cheese-related bit.

SPEAKER_03 56:18

Oh good. Please share.

SPEAKER_00 56:21

I think both Andy Warhol and Stany Stanley Kubrick did something interesting. Uh they were so off-beaten original that no one clocked onto the fact that they were being paid off by the big rectangle.

SPEAKER_03 56:32

Big rectangle.

SPEAKER_00 56:34

So is the cheese industry controlled by a big circle or by a big triangle? Possibly a big wedge. And did a big rectangle try and get in on the act by introducing craft singles.

SPEAKER_03 56:48

Oh, but craft singles are squares. Not rectangles. Well a rectangles are.

SPEAKER_00 56:55

All traps are arsenals. All traps are asses.

SPEAKER_01 57:00

That's a better name for it.

SPEAKER_03 57:02

All squares are rectangles, all chaps are asshole. All chaps are asses, all squares are rectangles. Yeah, they could have. Because is Stanley Kubrick the one that did the burn burn dunno? 2001, yes. Yes, oh the slowest moving ever. Yeah. Okay. I like that because.

SPEAKER_00 57:19

And Warhol, of course, put everything in, you know, boxes. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 57:21

Do you understand that big monolith thing at the end?

SPEAKER_00 57:24

Uh only if I'm really stoned.

SPEAKER_03 57:26

Yeah, I don't understand it.

SPEAKER_00 57:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:28

Why don't you ask Jody what it means? AI's interpretation of what is clearly the precursor to. But can you say, can you get really stoned and watch the end of? I don't think so. How? Explain the end of it. Isn't that what it's? Well, Hell, yeah, but Hal's not he they've left Hell by then. Um and then there's monkeys. No, I don't know. It starts with monkeys. It starts with monkeys. I'm thinking. It starts with monkeys. It starts with monkeys and monkeys and the rectangle, doesn't it?

SPEAKER_00 57:57

Yeah, the monolith is and then it evaporates or dis disappears and moves through time.

SPEAKER_03 58:02

Yes, and then it's at the end after they've go through the 27 hours of weird slip effect things.

SPEAKER_00 58:10

Yes. Which does make sense when you're stoned.

SPEAKER_03 58:13

Okay. Doesn't it start?

SPEAKER_00 58:14

Well, well, not to everyone probably, but it did one time when I was once stoned once watching it once. Once because he's only missing. Never be able to recreate that quite that mindset again.

SPEAKER_03 58:23

So those um control group.

SPEAKER_00 58:26

Brief moment means.

SPEAKER_03 58:27

You were the control group and the yes. The control and the test. Um so did we come up with a sol the a solution? Are we saying it's a no for the um the twisty daffamoir? Unfortunately it is from me, I'm sorry. Yeah, it's a no from me. What do you reckon? Good.

SPEAKER_00 58:44

I don't think it's gonna make it into a um so we can cook it.

SPEAKER_03 58:47

And I don't think it's that the twisties are going to ever uh uh uh that daffemoir has any concerns about twisties taking away from their flavour. Because that daffunoir they don't. It's it's yeah, could you eat with it so that it wouldn't be quite Oh, we didn't try it with um some of the Quince paste. Sorry, yes, I know I'm doing little dinosaur hands. Emma's looking at my hands, I'm hiding them now. So it makes me feel self-conscious.

SPEAKER_00 59:15

2001 monolith.

SPEAKER_03 59:16

Yes, what does it say?

SPEAKER_00 59:17

It's deliberately unknowable.

SPEAKER_03 59:19

Oh, is that what it said?

SPEAKER_00 59:20

It represents a jump in consciousness. That is a stupid AI way, every time the monolith appears, something qualitative changes. So ape to tool use, uh, human to spacefaring, astronaut to something post-human.

SPEAKER_03 59:36

Um post-human, I like that. Posthumanism. What is a post-humanism society? It's AI. Oh, Jody is a pluralist society. Oh my god. Of cultural hegemony. Hegemony. It sounds like Emma needs to go home and read. Emma, you've been reading too much. I love it. I mean, I love it. He is an Oscar. Is that what you just call you Italian? No, okay. Gramsky and Grammarski. Hey Gramsci. Hey, Gramsky. He is an Italian uh bloke who worked alongside Marxist theory with his Gramsci's uh hegemony, cultural hegemony.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:16

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:18

Yep. I'm surprised you didn't know that, Gunther. And Jim's mowing. Hey. And Jim's mowing. And the hedge. Yes, we do, of course. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:26

Thank you. That helps.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:27

Yep. On that note, I think we need to uh say goodbye. Do we? Okay. Yeah, we do. It's been a very Emma heavy app this time. I loved it. I love the Emma Hip. Emma Hip? Emma Hepp. I love the Emma Hip episode.

unknown 1:00:41

Yep, yep.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:41

I love the Emma Heavy episodes because they make me laugh. And you know, they give me so much to work with when I'm editing. And um, it's good because I didn't get to my animal, so I've got something for next time. Uh, and mine has a sound effect, so uh stay tuned. Um so um we'll uh catch you on the flip side, guys. Ciao.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:08

Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:09

Bye. Bye bye.