Ep 32 Otters are Jerks

Emma is convinced vets are operating an underground dog blood syndicate and follows it up with the gripping tale of her aunty’s neighbour’s alpacas. Günter tests the limits of good taste with a collection of highly inappropriate jokes, Margie drops by for a visit to keep us in line, and we uncover the uncomfortable truth... that otters are complete arseholes.

⚠️ Content warning: contains veterinary conspiracies, inappropriate humour, and serious otter defamation. Listener discretion advised. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_05 0:00

This podcast features strong language and questionable content. You know, all the fun stuff. That's the Guava and Laichi Sorbe from Aquia that Gem that Gems bought me. I love it.

SPEAKER_08 0:20

Yes, I think of you as an exotic Southeast Asian dessert.

SPEAKER_05 0:24

Oh, thanks, honey. That's a lovely intro. Yes, let's start with that. I think of you as an exotic dessert.

SPEAKER_08 0:30

Welcome, Dream Cheeses. I'm here with Billy who smells like a lovely Southeast Asian dessert. Guava and lychee.

SPEAKER_07 0:38

What do I smell like?

SPEAKER_09 0:38

Oh cheese. Hi Em. How are you doing?

SPEAKER_07 0:46

Good.

SPEAKER_05 0:46

Good. Thank you for welcoming us both. Emma, you're gonna um have you got a deep dive for me today? Because before you do, I've got an introduction for you.

SPEAKER_08 0:59

Oh no! Okay, she's written something.

SPEAKER_05 1:02

I haven't written it. It's played it. It's played. It's played it. Well, I've written it on the computer. Alright, are you ready? I'm ready. I've got three choices for you. Okay. Here's choice number one.

SPEAKER_07 1:20

Yes. I feel elevated.

SPEAKER_08 1:22

I feel it's one.

SPEAKER_07 1:28

And with your eyes, are she going to take a sally?

SPEAKER_05 1:38

She will take up. That's number one. Number one. And let me go back. Here's number two.

SPEAKER_07 1:56

Sounds like people thinking. I do like that one.

SPEAKER_05 2:15

Okay. I like all those ladies singing for me. Now, this is my favourite one, although it it starts off well and then goes into what I feel is an avatar-esque type soundtrack. Let's see, let's see if you can pick where it changes to you.

SPEAKER_07 2:33

I've not seen the movie. I know of it, obviously.

SPEAKER_05 2:35

Yeah, okay, well, let's hear.

SPEAKER_08 3:11

Spinning in her drive. It's mine key.

SPEAKER_07 3:17

It is the mine kick.

SPEAKER_05 3:26

Any of those take your fancy yet, or do you reckon? Number two. Number two. Yes. As in the second one I played. Yes.

SPEAKER_08 3:33

No, as in the funnest for poop.

SPEAKER_05 3:34

No, well, it's just I've got Emma's deep dive number two, but I actually think I played that first. Oh. So um this one. Yes. Okay. Yes.

SPEAKER_07 4:08

So you guys can sing. Are you not conflicted by this? Because you know the one you made for me for my thing? Um, critical sort of your homework.

SPEAKER_09 4:21

We had to get an intro song for your homework. That's that was fun.

SPEAKER_05 4:25

A podcast. But she came over and said, I'd love an introduction for my podcast. Can you make me one? But what was the full introduction? Normally I'm thinking, you know, Emma's podcast of blah blah blah. And then it had the longest convoluted fields.

SPEAKER_07 4:41

Reflection critical social work.

SPEAKER_06 4:45

And I kept doing it.

SPEAKER_05 4:50

It was fucking hilarious, but it got stuck in your head though.

SPEAKER_07 4:53

Oh, it didn't. It didn't. Catch me out. And then um you noted my slightly condescending hello.

SPEAKER_09 5:01

I loved it. Full intro, and then at the end of it, hello. And today on Critical Thinking.

SPEAKER_05 5:09

That's because Emma's a podcaster. She's got all she had all the setup. She came over to actually use the proper stuff to record it.

SPEAKER_07 5:16

To record it, and you created that. But then I was like, Jay, how cool is this? And Jay was like, I can't believe you use that. I can't believe Billy Gunther used it. Oh, AI. Yep. Yeah. He's like, what are they doing to artists? How are any of the very true? And he was like, they can they're both, you know, I can't believe this. And Jay was fully upset and irate.

SPEAKER_05 5:36

Yeah. And I I absolutely understand that. And we've got a mass, sorry, we're all just looking at the TV because Australia's just scored a goal in the World Cup. We already know.

SPEAKER_08 5:47

Not that we're placing this in particular point of time at all. It's just exactly when Australia just scored a goal in the soccer.

SPEAKER_05 5:57

Yes, because it's two o'clock and oh hello. And we also have Winda here who's who's um giving Em a little bit of love. Um we're puppy. But I agree with Jay. I totally agree with Jay. And it's really tricky, but it's also fun. It's it depends what you're using it for. We are not using it for, you know, to raise money or do something or getting or I don't mean yes, we could have paid an artist to write it and do it for us, but we wouldn't have. So therefore, we're just, you know, having a bit of fun and not making any money from something.

SPEAKER_08 6:28

I look, I'm I'm not gonna jump on the AI bandwagon and say it's all wonderful, right? And Rosie and all the rest of it. It's it's definitely got problems and it definitely causes problems, and it's definitely, you know, it's a big challenge and it's a big part of our emerging reality. But it is a big part of our emerging reality. And to to simply turn around and go that's not cool, and we don't like that, and it's taken away from artists and stuff like this, it's too late for that conversation. It's happened. You know? So we can't go backwards. It's not gonna happen. So I I think there's a huge there should be a huge push towards supporting artists and making sure that artists still survive and can thrive and and have a you know a place and all the rest of it, because that's where, you know, the art comes from in the first place, right? But doing weird AI stuff to generate things quickly is is not going away.

SPEAKER_05 7:19

Do you not also think that it opens it up for some artists? I think it opens it up hugely for a lot of us. Like I can sing, but I can't play or uh you know accompany myself or do anything. I could actually put something out for myself to promote myself without having to, you know, ha if I didn't have the money and didn't have the skills to to do something, yeah, I could use it to do that.

SPEAKER_07 7:43

But should you not learn the skills? You see this is just like night my.

SPEAKER_08 7:48

It's the ten thousand hour argument, right?

SPEAKER_07 7:50

Yes.

SPEAKER_08 7:50

Right? So, you know, i by the time you've learnt the four instruments you need to learn to be able to do anything useful.

SPEAKER_07 7:56

Forty thousand.

SPEAKER_08 7:58

Forty thousand hours have passed, right? And then you go, oh yeah, no, I didn't want to learn that one or that one or that one. I should have learnt this one. Um you know what I'm saying? Like it's it's it's it's a huge investment in time to find out that it may or may not be right for you. Uh, this is a weird argument, right? I'm I'm I'm not really supporting my own logic, if I be honest. But um but to be able to just create something quickly and go, cool, that's an idea. It's a thing, right? It now exists than it didn't before. You know, five times.

SPEAKER_05 8:26

Or just to have a little bit of cheeky fun, which is always very different to not being able to do that.

SPEAKER_08 8:32

And some things will survive that test well, and I think will be great for it, right? And then probably you'll re-record it with a real band and you know all that sort of stuff. But you know, many ideas. How many ideas can you explore if you have to go and record them from scratch? Because I've done this.

SPEAKER_07 8:51

Well, yeah, because I spent years doing this. Uh Dream Called Sane, the um the solo EP from your EP um uh New Bedlam. New Bedlam. No, but what was the was that what the EP was called? What was the EP called?

SPEAKER_08 9:09

Um, wow, it's been a while.

SPEAKER_07 9:11

And I can picture it in my mind that it was breakfast in bedlam. Yes, breakfast in bedlam and then dream oh my god, Billy has traumatized winter. Back to her usual animal second time today, too, that she's yelped with me.

SPEAKER_05 9:26

I'm sorry, little one. Remember when Billy got her foot stuck in the in the headphones?

SPEAKER_07 9:30

Throw back to when Billy said we should throw monkeys into space and kill them in order to But in space you can't hear them scream like that. Oh yeah. Said the best bit about it. That's why she prefers to go to monkeys in space.

SPEAKER_05 9:48

Um well we'll tie that up now, but can I can I just say one more thing? At at my school where I teach currently, they there is a campaign out by a group of your 11 and 12 students, and they've put it forward to the school and to the um hey uh and to um like to the parents, to the staff, and to the students to say no more um AI generated art in the school. So if you'll make a poster or if you're or doing something and you're advertising something in the school, you need to contact someone from the art department or a student or a you know, someone doing photography or whatever it is, and they'll provide you with the art to help you do it. And I was like, okay, that's interesting. Wait, but they've really pushed it, like they've been assemblies, they've been to school council, they've been to everything. Like they've really pushed not having you know, so and and the only time you would use it if a student, if if you've asked these people and people go, we can't make that for you. But you know, you you know, you can't make it.

SPEAKER_08 10:46

How would Rorschart and Jackson Pollock feel about this?

SPEAKER_07 10:49

Yeah, well, you know, I'm just saying it's a weird thing, you know. I think there is an obligation to preserve the integrity of human artistry in all of all its forms. That's I totally agree. And um, and I would like to pose this question to Bruce, as I know you're a big listener, Bruce Springsteen, and Nick Cave also, both long short. I've a um friends of the board. Yeah, we'll make sure I tag them. If if you guys can please address this, um, particularly Bruce, with your ability to story well, actually both of them. And Nick Cave is a modern day sage, and I love his um red hand files. I think they could speak really um on a complex level to it. But now taking it from the ridiculous to the sublime, love it all back again. Um we were talking uh so last night I went to a uh a place, and I would like to be careful where I say. Yep.

SPEAKER_08 11:48

Um you're saying a place internally?

SPEAKER_07 11:50

Uh I went to a place internally, an emotional place um to cheese dive. I went to a physical place where we had fondue cheese. Uh-huh. And it was cheese or cheese fondue. Yes, actually, you're correct.

SPEAKER_06 12:02

Does that make a difference?

SPEAKER_07 12:04

Yes. And as as Gunther said when I explained the experience of the the fondue, it was Fon Don't. But the group are amazing. Huge shout out to the Pilates crew um that we went with 15 years of knowing each other. And we were talking before we went into the Fon Don't, and um and I was talking about how I don't know actually why this comes up, this is me in all context. So this this is proof that this is me in all context, because I was telling them about my auntie's unusual neighbour who had two alpacas in his suburban backyard in Canberra. So he always had two alpacas, irrespective of, you know, one would die with time, obviously, and then they'd be fresh. There's always a duo. So I don't know whether that's a thing and that you should always have two.

SPEAKER_08 12:53

But does that mean you have to have three at some point to have a spare ready? Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 12:56

Is that to keep them company or something? Well, he just always had two, and they were mini ones, and he had like a little Lego.

SPEAKER_08 13:03

How many is a mini alpaca?

SPEAKER_07 13:05

It's as the size of Billy, height-wise.

SPEAKER_05 13:09

Oh okay so five foot ten. You wish. About five, five and a half, five's six, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 13:18

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So Billy obviously has a shorter neck. Um, a lot of alpacas might have a neck.

SPEAKER_09 13:26

She did play rugby for a few years, I think so.

SPEAKER_07 13:29

Alpaca is mostly neck. And then Emily who's mostly. Oh, a shorter neck than the alpaca, right? Yes. Hang on, did I friend? So you did, you did I got it. Yeah. Alpacas have mega necks. Billy does not. But the height is the same. And so they would hang over the back fence. He had a little Lego style car that he would pack them into the back of. They'd have their heads poking up in some roofs. Oh, and what are you serious? Drive round to um why have we never heard about this one this time?

SPEAKER_05 13:56

We're in like episode 33. Why are we just hearing about this now? This is episode one kind of material. This is all.

SPEAKER_07 14:17

That's exactly it. And he would take the alpacas in, they'd pat them happy times. And there was one super cute little um mini brown guy, and um obviously when um alpaca.

SPEAKER_04 14:33

Just ignorance.

SPEAKER_07 14:48

Mum was mini, mini little brown guy. He was smaller than Billy. And he was an alpaca. And so he had to take his alpacas for walks, just like dogs, because they only had a backyard, or they were in the car, which was very small. But he would take them for walks.

SPEAKER_08 15:11

But it had a sunroof, thankfully.

SPEAKER_07 15:12

It had a sunroof, but he put them on leads and take them for walks. Is this your uncle or your uncle's neighbour? No, my auntie and uncle's neighbour. Neighbor, yeah. And then he was out walking the alpacas, and a Rottweiler came, frightened little Brown, he ran off, and then the up the Rottweiler chased him, and then um the big neighbour, he was like a big, he's like from a Nordic country. Like I can't remember if his name is Fritz or Hines or something. He was running after he was he was running after him, and he's like, no, no, crying, crying, because the rottwiler was chewing up. And then he intervened, the rottweiler bit him. Then the rot pulled. Well wow, this this story just turned. Yes, and all the intestines pulled out the intestines and the neighbour. Then little brown ran all the way home, nearly got to the front door and died on the front lawn.

SPEAKER_05 16:07

Were the intestines out of the neighbour? The person. No, the alpaca.

SPEAKER_09 16:12

The rottweiler.

SPEAKER_05 16:13

Yes, the rottweiler chewed on the alpaca. Yes. Little brown. Okay, a little brown.

SPEAKER_07 16:21

That's his that's what he was. He was a little brown guy, super cute. And I wish I had a photo of him. And but he got, but it was really sad. He ran all the way home to try and because he got intestines broken, jumped up, ran. So where was the city? He was crying. He'd been bitten by the row wallah. He was like, come back. And he was like, oh no. And then the man with the rowwala just went rotwala came back and he kept walking.

SPEAKER_05 17:02

No. Yes.

SPEAKER_07 17:04

Did he sue him? So then the story unvolves, evolves. Unvolves. It unvolves. It unvolving. Yeah. And um what happened was that it was tragic. Like the alpaca was dead on the morning, nearly got home. And so he was like, This is so bad, this happened. I don't know, like maybe the Facebook got hold of it or the something. The so the community social. Everyone was like, these this is alpaca man with his beautiful alpaca, little brand's been eaten up, and this man has a let the dangerous dog and b taking no accountability. They found him, they put, I'm pretty sure. Um, then they put him down. The owner. Rottweiler, not the owner. Not quite quite putting the emphasis on where the I I know. I've got some I've had some sort of minor stroke over there. No, no, I'm just a misdirector. They put the rock wheeler down. Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 18:01

Then I I got an Academy Award for misdirection.

SPEAKER_07 18:05

Oh, but um, then he gets put down. Then everyone's like the rock while everyone at the thing last night was like, oh my god, that's terrible. So what that you were talking telling us to someone else. I thought you were just telling it to us. Yes. Then my friend said, Well, my 80-year-old dad was out for a walk in I feel like Blackburn.

SPEAKER_08 18:30

And he put a bit an alpha.

SPEAKER_07 18:33

He had an alpaca? Uh no, something, a dog bit him and bit through his trousers onto his leg. Then the man said, Oh, sorry, mate, and called the dog off. And the 80-year-old man had to hobble home. Then my friend had to go around and give him a um no, actually, my friend didn't give her dad anything. Drove her dad to the hospital. Gave him, they gave him tetanus of all of the sorts. And you know, older people, not being rude, but they've got creepy skin. Yeah. So like really damaged, and it really won't heal well. And I was like, fire out, dogs are out of control. Then the same friend said, Well, she had a dog called TJ. When she was 16, she was walking TJ and same thing, crazy dog, but a malamut. Yeah, mouth's beautiful. Came no, came for TJ and bit TJ. And then TJ started splurting blood, and so she ran TJ to the local, like, luckily, there was a vet around the corner, and um, he needed a blood influ inf transfusion.

SPEAKER_04 19:37

Influsion?

SPEAKER_07 19:38

Influ infusion. Influcer jam. The dog, the melamute. No, not the mount TJ.

SPEAKER_06 19:44

It's what's TJ person?

SPEAKER_07 19:47

Don't TJ's the dog.

SPEAKER_09 19:49

TJ's a hooker.

SPEAKER_07 19:53

No, no, that is a bad name. TJ Hooker, you're the best. Okay, TJ's a dog. So TJ had blood spurting. Yeah. She ran him into the vet. They said, we will need a transfusion. Then I said, What the F. Yeah. Where do they get dog blood from?

SPEAKER_05 20:12

Has anyone ever thought of this? Yeah. Because dogs don't go in to have a blood transfusion. Do they just give them dogs donations?

SPEAKER_08 20:19

Are they doggy blood banks?

SPEAKER_07 20:20

That's what I was saying. Do they go in and they get like a biscuit? Aha. So everyone was like, what the hell? We've never thought of this. But there must be like dogs that have operations that require blood, have blood losses. Yeah, yeah. So then my friend looked it up, and it turns out there is a dog blood bank. Wow. Of course there is. Synthetic blood. No, synthetic blood does not work. Wow. And so one of our other friends said, which I thought would have also been a fair point, perhaps they use cow, sheep, pig blood. No. Not as well.

SPEAKER_08 20:54

You can't cross species blood things. You can't cross type blood stuff. So how many blood types are there in a dog?

SPEAKER_07 21:00

I ooh, I should have deeper dove into that. Deeper dove. Deeper dove. But um how many are our own humans? Four. A, B, C.

SPEAKER_08 21:10

Thirty-one.

SPEAKER_07 21:11

Thirty-one. A, B, and O, isn't it? Negative positive.

SPEAKER_08 21:15

There's apparently give or take, there's 31-ish. Positive, negative.

SPEAKER_07 21:20

Well, actually, how many are there in a dog? And you ask the dog, they're not going to know their blood type. No. So and they can't carry cards unless they've got dog pockets.

SPEAKER_08 21:28

So that's the way the little bracelets.

SPEAKER_07 21:30

Yeah, they're when they look like that.

SPEAKER_08 21:30

That's why we have the collars.

SPEAKER_07 21:32

Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_08 21:32

But who tested dog for their medical alert collars?

SPEAKER_07 21:35

Well, no, but then it says that the otherwise they're not going to out well if you don't do that.

SPEAKER_08 21:40

No, yeah, but you don't. I mean you can give 'em plasma. No, but blood volume goods good with plasma.

SPEAKER_07 21:45

But Billy's saying so she ran in with TJ and they said what blood type is TJ? She's not gonna go, oh negative. I don't know. Yeah, you don't know. Like yeah. Unless you've done it, you've needed it. Yes. Have no knowledge of the blood types of TJ. I've never thought of that in. But I also thought Dog dogs don't go and volunteer. Like Queenie has never said to me, I'd like to go up and give a couple of minutes of blood.

SPEAKER_05 22:06

And you've never gone in your head, oh, I think I should go and take Queenie.

SPEAKER_07 22:10

Take Queenie up to donate her blood. Then also I furthermore thought on it and when we researched it, wow, my speech, they had uh they've got um oh god specifications, um, criteria. They have to be between one and seven years old, they have to be over 25 kg, so queen, I mean they could drain millions of litres of blood. Yep. They have to have all these special and they state that the the dogs volunteer the blood for the blood bank. Well they can sign a form, yeah. You cannot get consent from dog. So then we have this gnarly.

SPEAKER_08 22:51

Make your marquee poor butthole print.

SPEAKER_07 22:55

We had that's our dog signed with their butthole. Um apparently it's fairly unique. I like Billy's face. Um when she did.

SPEAKER_09 23:03

Um what was the connection then?

SPEAKER_07 23:07

Billy was pretending to be a dog, but you didn't get a butthole. And she had a face that was just scrunched up.

SPEAKER_08 23:12

Sorry, I just I thought that was a really down onto them.

SPEAKER_07 23:16

You thought I was saying Billy's face looks like a dog's butthole. The way it kind of comes. So then um we have this gnarly theory that every time you take your healthy pet into blood. They take a little bit of blood for their volunteer vet vampires. Quotation mark. Um is that quotation mark? Sure.

SPEAKER_08 23:39

Um, and yep, yep.

SPEAKER_07 23:42

They take a little tiny bit. Then I said genuinely, people need screeners. Is there dog aids?

SPEAKER_04 23:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 23:50

And then there is. There is dog aids. Yes. And then degades? De gates. There is. And so then Jane said to me. I'm like, does my dad need to get checked for dog aids?

SPEAKER_06 24:05

If it's transferable from what does that say about her dad?

SPEAKER_05 24:11

Then we were like, what happened?

SPEAKER_08 24:13

What kind of toilet books is he going to be?

SPEAKER_07 24:18

But then it's like, are you um Jango's my dad died? And it's like, what did you die from? Dog age? And you're like, sorry, decays? No. Decades. Dog age. Dog age.

SPEAKER_05 24:33

Like, we all die from decayed. Not all of us die from dog aids. We're gonna die. I'm gonna dive deeper into this and ask um Alex to ask her sister, who's a vet, to get us some more information.

SPEAKER_07 24:45

Do we all need to be cautious? Because think about it, when you put your dog in to get their teeth cleaned, they often have to well they do they have to use not euthanizing them. Maybe it's every time you do them.

SPEAKER_05 24:58

Your dogs have blood tests quite often. Sure. And maybe they take extra.

SPEAKER_07 25:02

And how much do they donate? Because people donate a big bag to dogs that need a tiny bag, they're smaller bodies.

SPEAKER_08 25:08

Well, surely the ratio would be much the same.

SPEAKER_07 25:10

So if you take them in though to get their teeth clean, take a little bit. If you take them in for an operation, a little bit. If you take them in.

SPEAKER_09 25:18

Emma's going into real paranoid movements.

SPEAKER_05 25:21

That's alright, they they volunteered in. I can see the little asshole on the paper there.

SPEAKER_08 25:27

Chocolate starts.

SPEAKER_07 25:28

They've just gone with the paper up to their butt. And now I'm genuinely scared because I don't want to be a good one. Emma's now never gonna take peeny into the vet anymore. I'm like in I I was a vaccinator and I am a vaccinator, but maybe guess what? Now I'm not a veteran. Maybe I'm gonna learn to treat my dogs.

SPEAKER_05 25:46

I'm gonna fact find this for you uh with uh Josie.

SPEAKER_07 25:49

Where is this dog bank? Yeah, dog dog blood bank. Where how do you ascertain consent from a dog and if so they don't just give them plasma? Dog plasma. No, because it said dog bank of blood. Okay.

SPEAKER_08 26:03

You'd have to have whole blood if you're gonna do proper operations.

SPEAKER_07 26:06

And TJ needed to be. TJ needed it. He had blood spurting from his and if only it they could have done that for the other pack. What sort of dog was um testing?

SPEAKER_08 26:16

Oh, so I have a I have a bit for you, Emily.

SPEAKER_05 26:18

Can I can I just please add into here? Muggie, I hope this hasn't caused you any trauma because mum was um attacked by a dog by a German Shepherd um puppy, I think it was. When they were sitting at a cafe, it just went up and bit her hand.

unknown 26:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 26:34

And did she have tendon damage? Yeah, she's had all sorts of issues with it. And did the did the owner take accountability? The owner did take accountability, kind of, I think. They ended up um because mum had to decide whether or not to put the dog down, because the dog was a young dog, and quite frankly, it was the owner's fault, not the dog's fault. The owner didn't have control over the dogs' shepherds need a lot of training. Yeah, so mum decided that it was um that she wasn't gonna ask to have the dog.

SPEAKER_07 27:05

But then what if the owner then just keeps taking the dog out to cafes? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the owner that shouldn't have the dog. It's the owner, it's that's yeah.

SPEAKER_05 27:13

Yeah. And and the owners should always have control of their dogs. Like that's how it should be.

SPEAKER_07 27:17

How old was Mangie when this happened? Maybe ten years ago. I know Mum will be able to tell us, but yeah. See, I was bitten by a German shepherd. Really? When when I was eight years old, walking to school with my friend Kohe, and he picked me up and carried me and ran me all the way home to my mum on my leg. And then there was a whole school assembly about dogs and not going near them. And I was like, hey, I didn't go near the dog. The dog's shepherd bit me. Did it just come up to you and bit bite you? Just came up to me and bit me.

SPEAKER_04 27:46

That's weird.

SPEAKER_07 27:46

And then Kohe was brave and carried me all the way home.

SPEAKER_08 27:49

The the bit that always got me about the the the great dog thing was um that that concept that they can smell fear. And that was the thing that made me the most fearful of dogs was the fact that they could smell your fear. It's like I wasn't previously fearful of dogs, and then you told me that, and now I'm fearful of dogs because they can smell my fear. Trying to suppress because they can smell it.

SPEAKER_05 28:10

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_08 28:10

Which is you know, it's one of those recursive kind of nightmarish kind of thoughts that um as a child it plagued me. It was quite weird.

SPEAKER_07 28:19

When we were in um pre when we taught prep, now known as Foundation Billy, remember we used to have to do the something responsible pet ownership responsible pet. And it was about educating preps because they would bring dogs in, but you know, considering not everyone, you know, having a pet is a privilege and not everyone has access to pets, and so they would bring the dog in and show them how to be around a dog safely, but then also would educate around an a dangerous dog. Like, here are signs of a dangerous dog. So they showed a picture of a dog and it looked like it had full rabies, its teeth are bared, and the kids are like, Oh, it's so happy, and then the bad is like what?

SPEAKER_04 28:57

It's like smile, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 29:00

Smiling and I can feel its teeth, it's a happy dog. But also, not all not all dangerous dogs look like that. No, no, no. So therefore it's it was quite buttons.

SPEAKER_08 29:11

But the dogs bare their teeth in a smile in the same way that we do. Hmm.

SPEAKER_05 29:15

Some they do. Staffies do. Staffies smile when they're happy. But they taught them, you know, go up with the back of your hand. You know, if their ears go down, don't touch them, and all that sort of stuff. Like they they were it was good, the responsible, responsible, the responsible penoship. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 29:32

And because the teachers couldn't say the name. They did, yeah, or spell it. Um we can make respectable.

SPEAKER_05 29:46

Why are they putting all these keys in the word responsible? Respectable. Sorry, Guncha.

SPEAKER_07 30:01

What's the case?

SPEAKER_08 30:01

Oh no, there was something I wanted I wanted to tell you, because on on the subject that you were just talking about.

SPEAKER_07 30:05

What? Dogs in German Shepherds' body.

SPEAKER_08 30:09

Um the stem cells for for the biochips I was talking about.

SPEAKER_04 30:13

Oh yeah. Oh.

SPEAKER_08 30:14

Like the cortical lab stuff. We were talking about the neuro kind of chips that are going into AI stuff, and there's gonna be, yep, there's gonna be like data centers for this sort of stuff. And we were freaking out about it. It's freaking out. And you really didn't like it.

SPEAKER_07 30:26

Oh yes. I didn't like it.

SPEAKER_08 30:29

No, okay, so I just wanted to research one particular point for you.

SPEAKER_07 30:32

Oh, thank you.

SPEAKER_08 30:33

To to assuage your fears a little bit.

SPEAKER_05 30:36

But I don't necessarily change your opinion, but I thought I had actually had a nightmare about that. Is it hang on, can you ask an answer question too? Please too tangent massively. Is it assuage? Is that what you just said? Yes. Asway as a swage. Thank you.

SPEAKER_08 30:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 30:55

French?

SPEAKER_08 30:56

Sure.

SPEAKER_05 30:59

Yes.

SPEAKER_08 31:00

And something about the word as well. Um Keep going. No, I the the the the point I just wanted to make to you was you were you were very concerned about the stem cells that you were used to make the neurons that were going into the chips. Yes. Right? And you were talking about, you know, does that come from you know um cortical blood or whatever it is?

SPEAKER_07 31:25

How is it is it ethically sourced? Are we allowed to do that? All that sort of stuff, right?

SPEAKER_08 31:28

And and in the early days, of course, it was exactly what you were thinking. Yes. Right? The early research was based around those sorts of things, like um uh cord blood and whatnot. But um they've now worked out, of course, and have done for some time how to do what are called pluripotent cells. So they've they've actually managed to take either skin cells or blood cells from anyone, right, and revert them back to stem cells.

SPEAKER_07 31:55

Oh, whoa.

SPEAKER_08 31:56

Yeah, so you can take any and you know, pretty much anything that's lying around.

SPEAKER_07 31:59

Like a scrape of flake.

SPEAKER_08 32:01

Skin flake, yep.

SPEAKER_07 32:02

Gandruff.

SPEAKER_08 32:03

Turn that back to a stem cell and then convert that to a neuron.

SPEAKER_07 32:09

Wow, it's a lot of processes, but it makes it a lot of things. It's a lot of processes, but it's ethically a lot more palatable. That yes, because I had images of farming um babies, like just to use the umbilical.

SPEAKER_08 32:24

When I said uh swage some of your fears, uh you know, there there are little elements like the fact that um when they were doing the testing, they used out of rats, it was the hippocampus specifically, extracted parts of the hippocampus, and in mice it was something about the the the the cerebrum, um, and so you know they were really harvesting actual neurons directly. Um and you know, we're pretty narcissist animals, we are pretty narcissistic animals for research.

SPEAKER_07 32:50

But I was also really concerned though, because you were talking about effectively a living organic computer. It is a living organic computer, absolutely. That has elements of feeling and ethically it is so fraught. As in at what point does it express thought, feel feelings, have self-determination?

SPEAKER_08 33:14

That's an incredibly detailed question, because and it's a beautiful question. Because I think that that really is, you know, uh what is conscious?

SPEAKER_07 33:21

Yes. Right?

SPEAKER_08 33:22

Are human beings conscious? Yes. Are dogs conscious? I think yes. Right? Are turtles conscious? I think yes. My personal opinion is that consciousness goes right down to the level of bacteria.

SPEAKER_07 33:35

Well well, cells hold trauma.

SPEAKER_04 33:39

Yes.

SPEAKER_07 33:40

So cells in a computer, like I just think there's ethically, I feel that there are lines that are becoming increasingly blurred and without an underpinning of philosophy, spirituality, religion, critical thought.

SPEAKER_08 33:59

So so would you differentiate a uh a cell uh a chip rather that was made on viruses?

SPEAKER_07 34:06

Do you mean computer viruses?

SPEAKER_08 34:08

No, no. Um, but a computer, you know, that was built around a virus structure, like a biological virus. Would you think about that differently ethically than you would about something that was built with a bacteria or um you know or a neuron?

SPEAKER_07 34:21

Oh, so do you mean like you get the common cold and build a computer from a cold?

SPEAKER_08 34:25

Well, I'm not suggesting you sneeze into a chip and all of a sudden you've got, you know, the world's groundbreaking AI.

SPEAKER_07 34:31

I you know I I would I'd be happy if it was made of farts. If we can make it farts, oh man, yeah.

SPEAKER_08 34:40

I'll I'll yeah, I'll accelerate their research enormously.

SPEAKER_07 34:43

Well, I feel like Hamish alone would probably get it across the line. Just one night. You hooked his blood up to a which speaking of Hamish, um, I sent this three to you. Did you show Gunther already? I haven't seen anything. The photo. Of what? So last night when I went out um to the Pilates cheese fondant, um, we I pulled up in the train station. Oh, sorry, no, I haven't showed Gunter. Yes. So you'll have to show you've got it up and ready. Um I um it was pouring with rain and very dark. So I pulled into this train station, there is no one there parking. And so I pull into a park, we go into the city, and then I return to the car this morning and find this on the windscreen. Can you please read and describe the visual image actually?

SPEAKER_08 35:35

So there's a turtle in the middle, it's a it's a yellow piece of paper, A4 sort of size. Um Wow. It's a it's a sort of outline, or it's a turtle shape thing. Um many three-year-olds have trouble staying within the lines, turtle. Maybe if you practice colouring this turtle, it will keep it will help with your parking.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

Yeah, now scroll across one. That's Emma's park.

SPEAKER_08 36:09

And Emma's at about a 70-degree angle in the parking spot.

SPEAKER_04 36:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 36:13

So someone's gone to the trouble of pre-printing these things. Just to be able to stick in the window of someone's car who parked there.

SPEAKER_05 36:20

He just happens to park back in the.

SPEAKER_08 36:22

That's he that's their gag and and they're just carrying it around with them, waiting for the opportunity.

SPEAKER_07 36:27

Waiting, because when I picked up my car early this morning on a Sunday morning, there were crickets. There were no I get it if it is um a train station at 7am on a Monday morning. And then I would have been more cautious with my part.

SPEAKER_08 36:42

But I'm still I'm really very, very busiest. What is what does practising colouring a turtle have it?

SPEAKER_05 36:48

Colouring between the lines, darling. Staying between the lines. Um stay in the country just like, ah, colour the turtle. That'll help me drive, wouldn't it?

SPEAKER_07 37:02

You have to put it up on the um on the website. I will um on the on the show notes. Yes. Um, but it was it was literally, yeah. If it had been peak hour, I get it. Like you'd be respectful, but it's crickets. Oh, hello. I think this might be muggy. Oh, you kept a muggy visit secret. Secret muggy. Secret. Oh, it's muggy.

SPEAKER_09 37:30

It is the muggy.

SPEAKER_07 37:34

What we were talking about was that my friend last night was saying um convoluted multiple stories, but involving dog bites. And her dad, who is 80, had been bitten by a dog. It went through his trouser leg blood. Yes. And but the man that owned the dog just went um sorry, mate, and walked off. So zero accountability. And then um, talking about um being bitten by a dog and then dogs needing operations as well. And do you know they've got dog blood banks?

SPEAKER_01 38:09

Yes. Did you know that? And horse and horse banks. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, for animals who get sick, of course. I never take that. People take thousand pay thousands to save their dogs. But then, like, they can't ask.

SPEAKER_08 38:23

But how do you get the blood in the first place? Yeah, obviously. But you know when that's interesting because. Emma's theory is that they're taking them secretly every time they take a little blood test. It's a little bit for the blood test, a little bit put aside for the blood break.

SPEAKER_01 38:37

No, I there's another there's another thing.

SPEAKER_08 38:39

I'm not suggesting that's a real theory.

SPEAKER_01 38:41

Yeah, we're just saying Oh, do you know a real? Yeah, it's a real thing. They've got dogs, especially bred somewhere.

SPEAKER_05 38:48

Oh, they breed the dogs to take their blood.

SPEAKER_01 38:50

Blood dogs. I I don't, you know me. I'm something that happens.

SPEAKER_05 38:54

Sounding like an Emma story.

SPEAKER_01 38:56

And and I know, because uh yeah, certain dogs to support other ones when they're sick. It's the same as they do with horses, they do that sort of thing as well.

SPEAKER_08 39:06

So you're saying there's there's sacrificial dogs for other dogs.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

No, no, no, no, no, they don't kill them, they take their blood, like somebody would take your blood. You'd give me your blood if you if I was dying, wouldn't you? Sure. Yeah. So that's what they do with that other person. Oh, so they've got nice lives. Yes, yeah. And then they've got um I I think so. Yes, don't fit for you.

SPEAKER_08 39:26

Muggie, tell us your story about your dog.

SPEAKER_01 39:29

Oh, my dog bite. I actually found the paperwork on that. See, I'm digressing already. Um, that's what we were doing. Digressing is our is our thing. And Brenton would hate it. Um, I do shove him under it. Um, yeah. Um we were out to Berwick at a cafe we always met the Rooneys at, our friends there for um lunch. And it was a special occasion because uh it was um Kathy's birthday, so I went and off and got her a present. Brenton was in the cafe with uh with Roy and Brenton was in the cafe with Roy and Kathy, and I'd been down the street. I came back with the present and they had an outside area uh out the front of the cafe, and people just chatting and everything, and I walked past, and the next minute I know I've got this shepherd, name of Roxy, nine months old, hanging off there there and hanging off there and hanging on my leg. On your leg too!

SPEAKER_08 40:30

I've got to get Mark's indicating her her left little fingers.

SPEAKER_01 40:34

I I won't show you because it's you know, yes. I have dents in my leg and hand. Um yeah, and so I sort of I don't know if I screamed, it's interesting, but I said, Would someone get Brenton? And because he was inside the cafe and they hadn't seen it happen. And anyway, I turned to the uh two young girls sitting on the edge of the uh you know open area, I was saying closed open area, and I said, Oh, she didn't say anything, and I said, Um, oh look look what your dog's just done. And she didn't know what to do because the dog she hadn't had for very long. Anyway, a million people say do rush over. I had a nurse, I had somebody else, had somebody else, and they said, You've got to go to because it it actually tore the tend not tendon. The whole ripped the whole of my little finger down and my ring finger as well.

SPEAKER_07 41:24

I'm imagining blood, like lots of.

SPEAKER_01 41:27

Yeah, so they wrapped me up and then the staff came out and I because you have to log it all, you know, once that something happens, and I said, Could you get my husband? So they did, and then Kathy and Roy came out and I said to Kathy, um, don't let those young people go without getting their names because they immediately left. So they tried to be dodgy. Well, I don't I was I was scared. I was totally scared because the dog had two goes at me. And and I think, and I have no idea why, because I didn't I I'm aware of dogs. You don't if you don't know the dog, you don't you know you look past it or through it, you don't acknowledge it, and it was a a shepherd. And there's certain dogs you're not frightened of, but we're but I think my rings, I don't know if my hand, my left hand was hanging down, and I thought the dog just decided it was a toy and then hung off it. So I was a bit yeah anyway. Long story short, Kathy came out and said, I think I better go to the bathroom because my leg's bleeding. So I had his four teeth in the in that there.

SPEAKER_07 42:25

Through linen, through jeans.

SPEAKER_01 42:29

And anyway, so um Kathy rounded up the young girl again, got the name, and she said, Oh, don't do anything to my dog. And I said, Well, I'm gonna report it. And the cafe wanted me to report it as well.

SPEAKER_07 42:39

Um good thinking though, Maggie, to say don't let them go anywhere.

SPEAKER_01 42:43

No, well have the presentation. They took no responsibility and she was going in the car. And that's when we discovered the dog was nine months old. She had it, but hadn't had much training. So long story short, I ended up at Daniel Hospital, and fortunate for me, because I don't like stitches, they they superglue everything together. But I d and I didn't have to have a tetanus injection. I was going to say, did you have to have a tennis inject? No, because we'd not been it'd been ten years since we went to Vietnam and we had a tetanus injection there and it was still current. So that was a good thing.

SPEAKER_07 43:14

What about this is silly, I know, but what about rabies?

SPEAKER_01 43:17

No, we don't have rabies in this country.

SPEAKER_07 43:19

Oh, so they don't have to be a good thing.

SPEAKER_01 43:21

No.

SPEAKER_07 43:21

What about dog AIDS? Is there such a thing as dog AIDS?

SPEAKER_01 43:25

You mean something in the mouth? Well, germs and stuff, but they they rush me through and did you have antibiotics? Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_07 43:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 43:36

What's that gum disease you get?

SPEAKER_01 43:37

Or gingivitis. Did you get gingivitis? No, I've got pictures. Pictures are great because they're an absolute mess. Anyway. And the one in your leg, what did they do for that? Sorry, um super glue. Just oh my gosh, it had torn it. I torn my pants, and I did say to the young lady, I said, You may owe me a new pair of pants, and then I really exored that. But what I did was I told the the um cafe that I Report reporting it to the council because all I could think of was if that had been a child, they wouldn't have had a face. Oh yes. And then I had the council came around and saw me. It took about three weeks, but they came around and they thought it up. The girl didn't have any contact with me, but I had her name, her car number, I had everything. Um anyway, they came around and I said, Look, I can't put the dog down. And I went, and that was a real battle for me because do you or don't you when you think what that dog because it was quite a nine-month-old, it was quite a large dog. Still a puppy. But untrained, and the owner wasn't taking it. So I had two well, I I said they came around, they took my statement, and I said, That dog will not be put down, but they have to have training. And I want proof of the training. So they got back to me with that.

SPEAKER_08 44:51

And actually showed you the proof. No, I'm gonna say no.

SPEAKER_01 44:57

Yeah, well, I uh the ranger came round twice to the house and took statements. Then he came again to see how I was, and he said, Yes, the girls have and I it was a canine special place where you go and get dogs tracked. So I could do no more, but I couldn't put a dog down. And then I thought, what if, what if, what if. But anyway.

SPEAKER_08 45:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:18

I don't know. So yes. Yeah, for what you said to me.

SPEAKER_08 45:22

I can't say what you're thinking, baby. Sorry. We're close, but we're not making it.

SPEAKER_07 45:25

I know Billy has no microphone. He just giving it to my head.

SPEAKER_09 45:29

You know, you can go over there and just sit next to him.

SPEAKER_07 45:31

Billy points at goodness.

SPEAKER_09 45:32

Points at goodness, says, just fill in this bit for me. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 45:36

Yes, yes, Billy. Billy's sitting there with headphones, giant headphones and a white puffy topic picture. Points the back.

SPEAKER_09 45:47

You talk now.

SPEAKER_01 45:47

Talk now.

SPEAKER_09 45:48

I am producing.

SPEAKER_01 45:49

Maybe you have an opinion on that. What do you think? My puppet contact so you're gonna take a photo. You have to come out. But it's interesting how it does put fear back in. It's like digressing away again, as I do, with the Falls and Balance clinic I went to for four weeks at the um coffee repat and said, do not fall, do not do not fall. And by the time I finished with the do not falling, I was so frightened. Yeah, it's just falling. It's ridiculous. And I actually get they want to.

SPEAKER_08 46:28

The stats are pretty scary.

SPEAKER_01 46:30

Yeah, oh absolutely. But the but I was going there for I saw psych, I saw OTs, I saw we practice falling. God practice falling, that's really funny. Um, take the impact.

SPEAKER_08 46:41

Uh can I can I suggest to you that one of the greatest things you can learn at any age is is judo for falling. Judo's got a really interesting technique for falling. And it's it's not with your arms outstretched, so literally with your arms outstretched and you slap the the mat with your hand and you explode your fingers. And there was a a training thing we used to do where you do this kind of flicking your fingers outwards kind of idea. Um and it and you train for ages to do this. It's quite uncomfortable when you start, but then it becomes, for whatever reason, kind of addictive. Um and when you hit the mat, you hit it with your hand, your arm sort of flat on the mat and your fingers exploding, and it it's meant to release the energy outward.

SPEAKER_01 47:24

Well, they told you. Now I don't know how they said do not fall with your arms straight. You're gonna break a wrist, you're gonna break a shoulder, or you're gonna break a so we we were practicing with wall on on the wall because we didn't want to fall on the floor. And you have to, while you're falling, bend your arms, and then while you're falling, also turn your head so you don't squash your face. And we were all looking at each other the classroom and going, by the time we fall, like instantly. Yeah, you're not gonna think about it.

SPEAKER_08 47:51

It's not something I get which executed it, which is exactly why you practice it.

SPEAKER_01 47:54

I'm not practicing falling.

SPEAKER_07 47:57

I'll push it. And when you've got I've got geopenia now, so I've got fragile bones. So of course they all smash. I have perfect bones, just so you know. Well done. I'm jealous. I'm jealous. You've got great bones, I've always said that. Um you do know that I had a fall, so I was stretching on the mailbox. I had one leg on the ground, one leg on the mailbox. That sounds like a euphemism of being silly in front of Hamish because we were going for a walk, so I was like, I better stretch, limber up. So I had like one leg on the mailbox, one leg on the ground, and then I stepped backwards, thinking my leg would just come with me, and it didn't. So I just fell straight backward onto my back, and then it would look so I went oof, and then um I looked so bad that a car was driving past, they stopped and they're like, Oh my god, are you okay? And I was so embarrassed, and I hit my head and I grazed my elbow and I hurt my butt. That's a lot of falling touching places, so many places were touched. And I understand what you were saying about the um the fall because when I get out of the shower and I lean with on one leg and I've got my eyes closed because of water, I feel dizzy. Do you feel that?

SPEAKER_01 49:12

No, I have this. My brother-in-law Howard put a wonderful railing up just as I get into the shower. I think I need that much. It's a white one, it's rather neat. I don't want old people's rails yet.

SPEAKER_07 49:25

I'd get a safety rail. It's a safety rail. Yeah, I think that's an old person's. No, it's not. It's not. I think it's a young person's sensible rail because when you're in the shower, it's a universal shower rail. Yes, it is. It absolutely, but like we can we sell this on Timu. You've got the yeah, you've got the water in your eyes.

unknown 49:44

That don't work.

SPEAKER_07 49:44

Water in the eyes, one foot, you get unbalanced. Why do you have water in your eyes? That's a good point. Well, when I don't have water in my eyes, so do you go get it?

SPEAKER_08 49:55

So when your shower comes from below.

unknown 50:00

No, come.

SPEAKER_01 50:02

I think it's time I went home.

SPEAKER_05 50:08

I just want to talk to you about otters. Oh, I like your shoes, Michael. Emma's on a tangent already. Sorry, I really do like them though. Um, I want to talk to you about otters. Otters. Yeah. Oh cute. You can cute, beautiful, cute little otters. No. Uh-oh. No, I'm not sure. I'm gonna read you called I want to read you this article called Otters Are Not Cute. They are sick, depraved jerks.

SPEAKER_04 50:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 50:39

Maggie's already I'm just uh shielding my face, my eyes from Maggie as I'm reading this.

SPEAKER_08 50:44

Someone who divorced an otter.

SPEAKER_05 50:45

No, no, no, no. And I've I have actually gone through and um since I've read the article, I did actually go back and fact check this. May 30th is World Otter Day. Okay, a day when your news feeds and your all your stuff all gets filled with these cutesy photographs of these fuzzy little otters, uh holding hands, juggling stones, doing all the cutesy stuff. And they are, they are bloody adorable. They are the cutest little things. However, don't be fooled by this PR campaign. Because behind those beautiful little eyes lie a dark secret. Otters are assholes.

unknown 51:25

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 51:26

It's often pointed out that humans will be foolish to apply their moral compass into nature. However, otters are total jerks. Right. So, not convinced, not yet. Right, there is a lot of evidence that they are sadistic, semi-aquatic ziggles. Right. Sadistic. For starters, they are really, the males especially are really violent and aggressive when they are mating. And the males regularly have been seen holding the female's head under water, biting their faces, and forcing them into submission.

SPEAKER_04 52:04

That's terrible.

SPEAKER_05 52:05

One study found that a considerable portion of the southern sea otters die as a result of the trauma from hyper-aggressive sexual mates.

SPEAKER_08 52:15

Half. Half?

SPEAKER_05 52:16

Half. Yeah. Half of otters die from a considerable portion. Where'd you get half? I don't know where you. Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_08 52:24

I just um it's not a considerable portion.

SPEAKER_07 52:27

Went half in your brain if you're not. It went immediately half in my brain. Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 52:30

Which is not a considerable portion.

SPEAKER_05 52:32

It's just slightly less than you heard half as well. I think so.

SPEAKER_08 52:35

Margaret heard half as well.

SPEAKER_05 52:37

They also don't just stick to their own species. They also force themselves on other aquatic mammals. No. Including hippos? Baby seals. But they did actually ever make a similar no, with a similar method of biting them. Yes, what would that be? Um the young seals also often die because it's aggressive. It's so aggressive, and they drown them. And they drown them. So they look nice and cute, but they are not. And if that wasn't grim enough, they and they have necrophilia. So the sea otters drown the female and then they hang on to the corpse and continue to have sex with the corpse. Drag it around and have continue to have sex with a corpse. For how long? Until they find another one to do.

SPEAKER_08 53:28

So um so in one prior report, I have so many things to say, and so many things I really shouldn't say.

SPEAKER_05 53:35

Yeah, well, on the on breeding mortality, a tagged territorial male sea otter, so he's been tagged, held a struggling female underwater until her body became limp, and then he copulated repeatedly with her carcass. Ten months later, there you go, Em. The same male was observed with the car with the carcass of the female sea otter. In both cases, the male was swimming, diving, guarding, and copulating with the carcass carcass. Oh, yeah. So not so cute otters. They also can grow up to 1.7 meters if you're thinking about the sea otters from snoot to toe. And they're snoot. Snoot. Snoot to toe. Um and they eat uh exclusively meat, but they are they um also if especially males will go into um uh prey behaviour with other animals. So there was there is a story of a monkey that fell into an otter enclosure. No, yes, and the otters then jumped on it, pushed its head underwater, and like and drowned it. Yeah, yep. And smothered it and drowned it until it died.

unknown 54:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 54:51

Absolutely. Very, very territorial. I'm just saying, I'm just saying otters, cute little warm, fuzzy things.

SPEAKER_08 54:59

Also, nightmare.

SPEAKER_05 55:01

Violent, depraved, sadistic sadistic rapists. Yes. So um that's my animal menatrified. Wow, it's the grimmest one that you've ever done. It's pretty grim. Beachless.

SPEAKER_08 55:14

And you're the editor, so you can include that or not.

SPEAKER_05 55:17

No, but I just found that because when you know, going back to when I went to the zoo at the um at Hall's Gap, they were there were three otters, and they were the girls must have stood there for at least 10 minutes watching them. They are just the cutest, cutest things, and they're just adorable, and they have the fish in their hands and they lie on their back and eat. And then so when I this article came up, I went, oh, surely it's crap. But it's not. If you look in if you look into it, there are multiple um uh articles and multiple reports and multiple um studies around otters and why they do that. The fact that the males are jerk so aggressive during their mating season that they hold the female and bite their faces and hold them underwater. They're terrible. Yeah. They're not the things you see on David Attenborough.

SPEAKER_03 56:07

Gunther, time for me to insert Gunther Hop, Guraska, Gunther Science Krapp.

SPEAKER_08 56:13

Oh, that means I have to do something scientific. Okay, cool. Alright, I'll do something scientific. I'm gonna read this because this is just an article that I thought was really cool.

SPEAKER_05 56:21

Um as cool as mine?

SPEAKER_08 56:23

No, yours is way cooler. Um Israeli airstrikes on oil facilities in Tehran on the 7th of March have led to sulfur dioxide emissions equivalent to a small volcanic volcanic eruption, potentially exposing people as far away as China to acid rain and toxic air pollution.

SPEAKER_07 56:41

No. Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 56:43

As part of the US and Israeli second album.

SPEAKER_07 56:47

Toxic rain. Toxic rain.

SPEAKER_04 56:51

No.

SPEAKER_08 56:53

But it might have been purple. Um as part of the US and Israeli campaigns against Iran, warplanes struck several oil depots and refineries that night, sparking massive fires that spewed smoke for days. Black rain containing soot and hydrocarbons fell on the Iranian capital. Residents reported eyes and skin irritations and difficulties breathing. Right. Now, data from a new generation of Chinese satellites has shown that the plume of sulfur dioxide released by these explosions and fires covered 300,000 square kilometres. Wow, that's a lot passing over Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, uh Kurdistan and Kazakhstan and China.

SPEAKER_05 57:35

Wow. So how do they test for that to see if it has actually gone into there if if China won't let anyone in to test for it? Sorry. That's winter.

SPEAKER_08 57:48

Sorry, I'm not quite sure I understand your question.

SPEAKER_05 57:50

Well, no, you're saying it's going into China and such. How do they test surely the Chinese wouldn't let people in to test that sort of thing to see if it's fallen there, if acid rain is falling into China?

SPEAKER_08 58:00

Well, China would test for that.

SPEAKER_07 58:04

Yeah, yeah. They they do it um in they did it in um But you can also test by via satellite.

SPEAKER_08 58:09

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 58:10

But even though basically spectroscopy spectroscopy. The reactor in um Chernobyl? Yes. They could test that. Like it they go put it I mean like there's heaps of gadgets that go. So sulfur, what I do in the and that's a good sign. Um sorry to go that's a bad sign. Um so sulfur sulfur dioxide, bad sign, yes.

SPEAKER_05 58:36

Bad sign. So but tell me what that does. Yeah, I was gonna say, what does it do? What is uh what is I mean clearly sulfur dioxide. Clearly it's not a good thing, but what does it cause?

SPEAKER_08 58:44

Well, you're aware of sulfur dioxide, yes.

SPEAKER_05 58:46

No, is this the smelly one? Yeah, that's the smelly one. That's the smelly one, yeah. That comes out of yeah, that's the one that's in Rotorua.

SPEAKER_08 58:53

Yeah, but it's also very, very bad for everyone. Yeah, yes.

SPEAKER_05 58:56

And what does it cause? Cancers, I assume, yeah, like everything else.

SPEAKER_08 58:59

You know, it's you know, bad guesses. Yeah. But it's what comes out of volcanoes, right? So the equation of a bombing attack to a volcano, I think, is where the the the poetry lives in that particular thing, right? You know, we had that whole period where people couldn't fly into parts of Europe because the volcano exploded. Right now, think about that. The result of that would be the same exactly as the bombing run that was done in Iran. Yep. Right? You couldn't fly past these places for the same exact reason.

SPEAKER_04 59:35

Yes.

SPEAKER_08 59:36

Right. So you know, there's it's there's scales and then there's scales. And and uh for me, the the man-made ones are always now it was starting to, you know, outperform the natural ones.

SPEAKER_05 59:48

But there was only one bombing round. There's been multiple bombing rounds, so therefore clearly there's more of that sulfuric sulfuric rain? Sulfuric rain? Yeah, more of that. Sulfuric acid is what of course forms, right? So how do we know if we know when it gets into it?

SPEAKER_08 1:00:05

Sulfuric acid hydrochloric.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:06

How do you know if it gets into people and food and agriculture and stuff? How soon after that sort of stuff are you able to tell?

SPEAKER_08 1:00:13

Well, I think what is is classically the case is we don't really know for a very long time.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 1:00:19

All this stuff is always, you know, you can kind of pick up on on the fact that there might have been something. And and there's a plant. But you know, food chains and and and things and birth defects and blah blah blah blah blah. Uh y that's a really dark version of it, but you know.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:34

Food chains, birth defects, and just birth defects.

SPEAKER_08 1:00:46

And we mommy took it. Be together. Okay, I have four little poems.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:51

Ooh, I love a Gunter poem.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:52

Yes, me too. That needs to be a new section. You said that before, and I said, no. No, it just goes in, it just goes in. Maggie says yes.

SPEAKER_08 1:01:01

I'm calling them poems.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 1:01:03

I consider myself an equal opportunist. So I put little bumps all over my penis, you know. For the blind.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:16

Of course that happens to be the one you're reading when my mother's sitting here listening to the podcast being recorded. Emma's face is just horrifying thinking to read that in front of mum. Um, I'm just gonna say next. Moving on.

SPEAKER_09 1:01:52

Alright, yes, I have three more. Um, little poems.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:56

Thank you for caramel. Yes.

SPEAKER_08 1:02:00

I have a new rule to curb my alcoholism. Last undrink of the previous night must be the first drink of the morning. Now I'm trying to remember if I played penis swizzle stick or not.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:16

Oh, good tell. Why are these all penis related? What is the theme?

SPEAKER_06 1:02:23

Why are these phrases? Why are you deciding to read them now? Because it's perfectly small.

SPEAKER_08 1:02:34

Alright, okay. Okay. Not penis related. I'm not quite sure how to pr pronounce this one, but um or or what frame I should put in it.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:45

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 1:02:46

I asked a professional how to spell ASMR, but I couldn't quite make out the answer.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:53

Ah, because they're like that's a super quiet, creepy toik toykin?

SPEAKER_08 1:03:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:02

Toikin.

SPEAKER_08 1:03:02

It's when it's yes, it's see the penis jokes get laughs.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:08

Too subtle.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:09

Too subtle. Too quiet. All right. Somewhere in between um ASMR and a penis.

SPEAKER_09 1:03:17

That's the sweet spot. Okay. All right.

SPEAKER_08 1:03:29

Taint.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:33

Alright.

SPEAKER_08 1:03:35

Okay. My dry cleaner was complaining he needs a challenge. So I sent him eight dogs and a leopard, and I said, remove only one spot.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:48

Were all the dogs called spot? Booom. Shh. Oh, well don't country is the colour.

SPEAKER_08 1:03:55

And AI's AI's response to this, though.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:58

Oh no, this is the one you told me this morning.

SPEAKER_08 1:04:00

No, this is this is one line that just came out after AI was because I I tell my jokes to AI why I don't know, because it has no idea about Joke.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:07

Jody or Claude?

SPEAKER_08 1:04:09

Uh Jody mostly, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 1:04:11

Um and it literally said, and this is just an excerpt, explains why half your jokes feel like they were written by Douglas Adams with a mild head injury.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:21

And it's like it's kind of it at the same time, it's really high praise and like but you did say something to me this morning, or yesterday morning, where you said, you know, there was something you told me a joke and I didn't find it funny. You said, well, AI finds my jokes funny. And then you read it to me when it said, and didn't you take a screenshot? It was something like it was its praise of your jokes was just ridiculous. It wasn't 11 out of 10 or something.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:45

Like yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:47

It was like it gave it a um Oh, you said that through without context. I was like, is this for our podcast? What is this?

SPEAKER_08 1:04:54

Oh, yes, okay. Well let me let me try and find it.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:56

That'll be in um Signal. Signal, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:00

We've got a special chat for the um the pod.

SPEAKER_08 1:05:04

There is a lot of information in this particular channel that is all very weird.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:08

Um mostly created by Gunter.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:11

Including not recently, and that was your cheese your cheese in there.

SPEAKER_08 1:05:17

If I were scoring it technically, premise originality eight point five out of ten.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:21

Can you start that again and talk a slot, please?

SPEAKER_08 1:05:23

If I were scoring it technically, premise original uh originality eight point five out of ten, compression nine point eight out of ten, surprise reveal nine out of ten, audience groan slash laugh ratio, excellent metric, eleven out of ten.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:38

And but I like it gives you a groan or a laugh.

SPEAKER_08 1:05:42

It very much leans on the you know it's not gonna be just a clean laugh, it's gonna be a groan. My therapist told me to be more open about my feelings. Now we hold hands looking out across the lake. Yes, I kept her hands.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:01

You are an otter! You are an otter. Uh an on that tick. And on that tick. I think it's time to say goodbye. I think I'm just a cheery note. On that cheery, cheery note. Good for's laughing, he's crying. Emma is absolutely horrified, and um, so uh thanks for listening, and we'll catch you on the flip side. Bye everyone.

SPEAKER_08 1:06:24

Bye.