E43: What Happens When Food Noise Goes Quiet?

If food noise gets quieter, don't just pay attention to what disappears. Pay attention to what emerges. Because sometimes the most important discoveries happen in the silence.

What happens when food noise goes quiet?

As GLP-1 medications become more common, most conversations focus on weight loss.

But what happens when appetite changes, along with your relationship with reward, pleasure, motivation, and desire?

In this episode, we're exploring the emotional and identity shifts that may accompany significant changes in appetite and reward pathways.

This is not an argument for or against GLP-1 medications.

It's an invitation to understand the whole picture.

You'll learn:

• How reward pathways influence behavior
• Why food is often about more than hunger
• The connection between dopamine, pleasure, and motivation
• Why some people report changes in shopping, alcohol use, and cravings
• The powerful question every woman should ask before pursuing weight loss

Weight loss may be the most visible change.

But identity is the biggest one.

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Transcript

What happens when food noise goes quiet?

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Let me ask you, what if losing your appetite changed more than just your eating habits? What if it changed your whole relationship with pleasure, with comfort, with reward, with desire, with yourself? Today we're going to talk about something that has fascinated me, both as a nurse and as a midlife woman, watching the explosion of GLP1 medications. And let me be clear from the beginning: this is not an argument for or against GLP1 medications. For many people, these medications have been or can be life-changing. They've improved their blood sugar control, they've reduced the food noise, they've supported them through significant weight loss, improved their overall metabolic health, which is going to improve their long-term longevity. So this episode is not about whether or not you should take them. What I want to focus on today is understanding that when you change your appetite, you may also be changing other things, especially up here in your brain. And if you are considering these medications or you're already taking these medications, then you deserve to have all of the information.

Welcome to part 3 of a series.

SPEAKER_01 1:10

Welcome to Unmute Your Midlife. I'm Joyce, a nurse-turned midlife strategist. This is where midlife gets explained and standards get raised.

SPEAKER_00 1:19

Think of every episode like your strategic briefing. You'll leave knowing exactly what to observe, what to adjust, and what to implement next. Midlife is not a decline. It's a leadership test. So let's

The question that started this episode.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

begin.

SPEAKER_01 1:34

So over the last couple of years, as GLP1s are being used by more and more people, I have heard women describe something kind of fascinating. You know, as a girl who grew up with diet culture in the 80s and 90s and who, you know, was an athlete and in dance and always trying to watch my weight. What do we know? The minute you start a diet, that's when somebody has a birthday party and they bring cake, or that's when your mom invites you over for a homemade chocolate pudding. So it's not just that people are saying that they're eating less. I'm hearing people say things like, I don't even think about food anymore. Like it is a non-issue. I don't have cravings. Sometimes I completely forget to eat. And I might even hear some of them say, like some of the wine moms, oh yeah, I don't really even feel like I need that anymore. They don't um, they don't enjoy other things either, like shopping, you know, they don't feel that pull to go spend an hour wandering around the aisles of Target or combing through the clearance racks at Kohl's. But then sometimes I'll even notice them say that they're they're just not that interested in anything anymore. Like they don't just lose their propensity to overeat, they lose the propensity to over-shop, overindulge in other things. They don't just lose their interest in food, they might lose their interest in in sex, they might lose their interest in hanging out with friends, with doing hobbies that they used to really enjoy.

Food was always doing more than feeding you.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

So all of that got me wondering what happens when the food noise goes quiet? Because let's be honest, food was never just food. Food wasn't just feeding your body. I mean, we don't just eat when we're hungry, we eat when we're celebrating, we eat when we're sad, we eat when we're bored. We don't come home from work after a stressful day and grab a bag of chips or a bag of jet-puffed marshmallows because we need the nutrients in those items. We do it because we're looking for relief. Food is woven into our lives. It's comfort, it's connection, it's tradition, it's culture, it's a reward, it's entertainment, it's a hobby for some people, it's a way to manage stress or get pleasure. And sometimes even it's just a routine. You don't eat because you're hungry, you eat because, well, it's lunchtime. I'm supposed to eat now. So for a lot of women, food becomes one of the reliable ways to trigger dopamine release throughout their day. And so when your appetite changes dramatically because you're taking this medication that affects your dopamine, it makes sense that other experiences are affected as well.

Let’s talk about dopamine.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

Okay, let's get just semi-nerdy here and talk about dopamine. Dopamine is your feel-good chemical, but that's not entirely an accurate way to describe it. Dopamine is more about anticipation, motivation, seeking, wanting. It's part of what drives us towards rewards or pleasure or novelty, towards experiences that are going to make us feel good. Food activates those pathways. For some people, shopping activates those pathways. Alcohol can activate those pathways. Social media, or even uh video games, you know, for boys, scrolling for everyone. There have been tons of studies that show that that kind of engagement activates those pathways, those dopamine pathways. Achievement can activate those pathways. You know, that's why some people are so motivated to achieve, because they want the dopamine hit. Generally, human beings, we are wired to seek reward. That's part of our survival. And it's also part of how we experience joy.

The new emotional work you have now.

SPEAKER_01 5:12

So the reason all of that matters, and the reason that I'm making this episode today, is because there have been reports from people who take the GLP 1 medications that sometimes the changes go far beyond food. Researchers are now actively exploring those effects, but some of these individuals are reporting that they have a reduced interest in alcohol, a reduced compulsion in shopping. They have noticed reduced impulsive behaviors, if that's something that they struggle with before. And then just reduced cravings in general for anything that you might have a craving for. I know we probably still have a lot to learn about why this happens and how significant it is, but it's definitely raising some fascinating questions about reward pathways and human behavior. Because think about it, if the volume gets turned down on the form of one reward system, then what else is changing? So here is a question that I think more women need to ask. If food isn't providing comfort anymore, then what are you feeling now? And I think even if you're not using a GLP1, but you are losing weight or have lost weight, this is still something that could be healthy for you to examine in your own life. Because as we said, food is a way of self-soothing. So if we're not eating as much food as we used to, then we're not self-soothing with that method now. So what's taking its place? How are you getting your comfort if you're not getting it from food? I mean, food did a lot of different emotional work for people. Sometimes it soothed loneliness, sometimes it soothed stress, sometimes it soothed boredom or gave you an excuse to take a break. I mean, sometimes we use it as a reward after carrying everyone else's load all day. You come home, you're like, I deserve that. Fill in the blank, whatever your favorite treat was. So when you take that coping mechanism out of the picture or the need for it becomes quieter, then the emotions that were previously buffered by feeding our face, they they're going to become more noticeable. This reminds me of when my dad gave up smoking and he said he'd be um standing around with the guys on their smoke break, and he didn't know what to do with his hands. Like he didn't miss the nicotine, he didn't miss the cigarette anymore. He definitely didn't enjoy the smell of the cigarettes anymore, but he still didn't know what to do with his hands. And this was before they had fidget spinners and fidget rings and stuff like that. And so we were all trying to figure out what to tell him to do with his hands in those situations.

The loss you didn’t get warned about.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

So while everyone is talking about losing pounds, nobody's really talking about losing a relationship. I mean, you kind of had a relationship with food. It was a routine, a comfort, an identity. And when you shed a large amount of weight and you shed those eating habits, it's almost like you're losing a companion. Because for some women, you know, food has been a companion for decades. It's been their Friday night treat. Say the glass of wine after work, the reward after a hard day, comfort during grief. So when those rituals change, there can be this unexpected adjustment period. I mean, maybe even grief, you know, because it is a loss. Like you might miss some of the things. I was really getting into making these decorated cookies. And now I kind of I only do it when there is a special occasion or someone requests them from me. I don't just do them all the time for the fun of it because I can't really eat them. I could, I can, I have the option, but like I don't want to sit and eat a dozen cookies, and so I don't want to make them and have them sitting around all the time. And I don't like how all that sugar makes me feel. Like it literally makes me feel sick. And so this hobby that I was getting really good at that people looked forward to, you know, getting my cookies, now I'm not making them very much. I mean, it's been a couple of years now, but initially I was like, Oh, I kind of miss making my cookies, or I miss, you know, not always having cookies in the fridge to to pull out and give to somebody, you know. And that's that's a silly thing. But then again, it's not because I didn't even really realize until I started doing this, you know, deep thinking about all the subject of today's episode that that it was um, that it was something that I kind of lost. And then you think, well, what are you filling your time with instead? You can be grateful for your improved health. I am definitely grateful for my improved health, for my increased energy, for knowing that I'm doing right by my body so that I can have a better long-term, you know, longevity, that I'll be able to keep my independence, that I will be able to prevent dementia. I mean, maybe, maybe not, but I'm doing all the things I can that I know of to prevent cancer, dementia, the things that I've seen attack my family that I don't want to go through. And so I am grateful for my improved health. I am grateful that the food noise isn't such a struggle anymore. But I can also acknowledge that something is different. Kind of like both things can be true at the same time. Because I do find myself thinking, like when there's a special occasion, you know, I used to go maybe to the bakery. If I didn't make my own cookies for them, I would go to the bakery and get one of those cute fancy cupcakes. And now I don't do that because I think, well, I don't want someone to give that to me because, you know, I don't want to eat that stuff on a regular basis because I don't want to poison my body. And so if I don't want to do that to myself, I'm certainly not going to do it to the other people I care about. So I have to come up with other ideas, like, well, would they want a book? Would they want a journal? Would they want an experience? And then you used to go out for ice cream as a family or snow cones. And now that's like, well, do I want to do that? How much sugar have I had today? Not because I'm being like legalistic about my weight or anything, but because I am being protective about my brain. I know what sugar does, excess sugar. I know what excess sugar does. So you have to rethink how you're gonna celebrate things. It's definitely food

Your post weight loss identity.

SPEAKER_01 11:07

for thought. Which brings me back around full circle to what today's conversation is supposed to be about, which is so many women who have struggled with their weight, they think to themselves, when I lose weight, everything is gonna be better. I'll be happier, I'll be more confident, I'll feel more fulfilled, I'll be more loved. They might think I'm gonna be more secure, I'm definitely gonna be more successful. Then the weight comes off and they discover something really surprising. They're still them. They're still themselves. It's the same person, the same skinny person was inside the bigger body. So they probably still have the same insecurities, they may still have some of the same relationship patterns, they may still have some of the same emotional wounds that they had before. Weight loss changes the body, but they have to do identity work if they want to change their life.

Don't assume every change means something is wrong.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

So I said that we're doing a five-part series. This was part three. The theme of the whole series: just because something feels true doesn't mean that you've identified the root cause. So, relating to this week's theme, if you're experiencing major shifts in your appetite, in your desire, in your motivation, in your reward or your pleasure while you're going through weight loss, with or without a GLP one, but especially with. Get curious. Observe, you know, I like to look for patterns. Take some time to journal, even if that's not your thing. Make sure that you're reflecting on the changes that are happening. Don't rush to conclusions. Don't assume that every change means something is wrong. Don't assume that every emotional shift is going to be permanent. And last of all, allow yourself some time to understand what you're experiencing.

Your ONE lever for this week.

SPEAKER_01 12:42

So here's your one thing to do this week. Grab a piece of paper or your journal. I want you to journal on this one question. What am I hoping weight loss will solve? Now be honest. Don't just write what sounds good or what you think someone else would want to read. Because you're the only one reading it. But write what's true. I mean, how are you hoping to feel? Are you hoping to feel confident? Are you hoping to feel more visible, more desirable? If you want to be more desirable, then to who? Your husband? Everyone? Are you thinking it's going to make you feel safe or more accepted, more worthy? Are you thinking it's going to give you more energy? The reason you want to ask yourself these questions and know what it is you need, what you're looking for, because sometimes the answer that you're looking for has very little to do with the number on the scale. And you need to understand that. Remember, the weight loss changes the outside appearance, but identity work is what's going to change the things going on inside.

Shrinking your SELF is not the goal.

SPEAKER_01 13:35

Again, GLP1 medications, they are changing lives. For many people, they're providing tools that never existed before. But every tool comes with a ripple effect. And the more we understand those ripple effects, the more empowered we become. Weight loss might be the most visible change, but identity is your biggest change. And if this midlife season is teaching us anything, it's that the goal is not just to shrink your body. The goal is to understand yourself. Next week, part four, I'm going to talk about another hidden influence that affects midlife women.

How to work with me.

SPEAKER_01 14:10

Now, if this episode raised your standard, good. Go implement it. If you're ready for structured implementation, unmute your midlife is where we do this kind of work. You can schedule a free unmute session, put it as a best plan for you. And while you're here, click on whichever link video pops up for more estimates to follow back with more new stuff in the video. Thanks for listening.