We Answered MORE Controversial Reddit Posts 🤓 Officially Unofficially #27

You LOVED our last Reddit AITA chat, so we thought we'd do it again. 

We also discuss stag dos, dog ownership and the pleasure of being introverted.

Please rate 5 stars and post a comment - we really do read them all <3

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

We're looking at more. Am I the assholes? Am I overreacting zuz? And also, I've cool call. I slipped in a pro revenge in there. I've got what? Yeah, yeah. We've judged these based off titles. That's that's the current plan. Just title only, are they good?

SPEAKER_01 0:17

Yeah, I I went controversial as well. So controversial is always more fun. You're more of a top man because you like it when it's like, am I the arsehole that I I left my mum after she beat me? No.

SPEAKER_02 0:27

No, depends what you did wrong.

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Yeah, probably not.

SPEAKER_02 0:30

Zero up votes, 730 comments. You know you're in for a good ride when it's that disparate. Um am I the arsehole for quote ruining my daughter's birthday party? I thought he's already soft victim blamed his daughter. A little bit, yeah, the ruining. Yeah, okay. I, 45 male, have three kids 16 male, 14 male, and 12 female. This story concerns 12 female.

SPEAKER_01 0:57

Okay, this is not the sexic friendly, but carry on. Okay. Got three kids.

SPEAKER_02 1:00

Now, my daughter's birthday falls on New Year's, so it tends to be disregarded, never on purpose, because it's between two big holidays, but we've always tried to make her feel special. My daughter is a known introvert and tends to spend a lot of her time in her room, and if for a family event, she just sits in a corner on her phone. There's no way you respect that.

SPEAKER_01 1:18

I completely carry on about how you respect that.

SPEAKER_02 1:21

She's also very, quote, unconventional, in the sense that she doesn't desire a lot of the things that are typical of girls her age. Me and my wife have tried to fix this and get her to open up more, but to no avail. The issue arose because when me and my wife asked her how she wanted to spend her birthday, she said something along the lines of alone with snacks in my room. My girl, hell yes. This request wasn't outlandish for her. It would also reflect poorly on us as the family likes big celebrations. Oh, okay. So instead, we invited family over on her birthday for a birthday/slash New Year's celebration. It was a barbecue with lots of snacks, a projector that my brother brought and rented a bouncy castle. I thought she would realize that this was better and a more productive way to spend her birthday.

SPEAKER_00 2:20

But just I was wrong. I get it now, like Danny DeVito in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

SPEAKER_02 2:29

Is that the whole thing? No, no, no, there's a bit more. But there's no way that you can read that you can read this back and think, yeah, we thought we could just fix her. We thought we could tell our daughter how she actually does want to have fun, and she would then agree with us. She'd be like, Yeah, no, this is great. I'm glad I get to chat with weird cousin Andy for the next four hours. Thanks, father. Um she was miserable the whole time and just sat in the corner.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

Good for her.

SPEAKER_02 2:53

When everyone left late at night, she started screaming at me and my wife about how we quote ruined her birthday. My wife did most of the scolding and she was sent to her room. So that's just a not a punishment. That's what she wanted. Go to your room and eat birthday cake. For any other child, it'd be like, right, you've been naughty, go to the bounty castle. Uh my wife's most scolding, she was sent to her room. How could we ruin her birthday if her plans were just bedrotting? She was also mad because she didn't get the gift she wanted, which was a hot chocolate machine. She's the only family member who drinks hot chocolate and she's not 50. So we got her something else that we thought she would appreciate more.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

What a fucking tabagotchi, a polypocket. Here you go, love. Why are you being a dickhead to your hot chocolate? What birthday was this? Was it her 12th?

SPEAKER_01 3:47

I guess her 12th, yeah, I assume so, yeah. Okay. Yeah, two young fat chocolate, famously.

SPEAKER_02 3:51

Junk fat chocolate, and she's not 50. You're not 50. This morning she ignored all of us, including my sons who are who are on our side because they think she's being ungrateful since the party was great. I was trying to make her birthday special. Am I the Arsehole?

SPEAKER_01 4:11

Yes! Yes! Oh my god, I hate this parent. The girl, Julie, she wants to spend a day to herself. That's totally fair. If there's if there's an upcoming family event, you know, it's it's your cousin's birthday, it's your mum's birthday, whatever, she can suck it up, grin and bear.

SPEAKER_02 4:29

Yeah, you have a day of discomfort that you're not gonna love it. My brother was very similar when we were growing up. I was always like kind of fine hanging out with family, he always hated it. But it's just you gotta fucking do things sometimes that you don't want to do. You're gonna go to the barbecue, you're gonna go to the big Christmas thing. At some point, yes, have time to yourself, cool, whatever. But in life, you're gonna have to fucking do things that you don't want to do, and that's good to learn.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

Life is just uh a constant carousel of trying to find time to yourself and having to do things with people. Not if you're like me and my girl Julie.

SPEAKER_02 5:04

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, you and Julie can bedrock together. You can bedrock with a 12-year-old. How does that sound?

SPEAKER_01 5:08

Genuinely, so you know, as you mentioned, we were at your stag um over the weekend, and my day yesterday, because we we worked for ourselves, um, we we took a day off, and I took a day soft off. I was at my computer, I ate probably about 9,000 calories between chocolate and pizzas and snacks. Do you know what I mean? Like that's that's my vice, that's how I recharge. And then I went and stayed and I was like, yeah, woo, how do I become a better man? But yesterday I did nothing, and it was great. And to have someone take that away from me for quote, my own good.

SPEAKER_02 5:38

That's the annoying thing. It's it's the fact that the dad reckons. It's such a fucking classic parent thing, where it's like, I'm doing this because I know you better. And every now and then, I am sure there are moments where parents have been correct about that. Of course. Every now and then, whatever. Obviously. But like the situation for this is okay, what are the main things my daughter wants? The present will fuck that off. She's not 50. That's so weird.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

It's also like because no one else uses hot chocolate. Okay, no one else wants a polypocket, but you can't assist that she gets that.

SPEAKER_02 6:12

It's for her. She wants that. It's her birthday. My mum got me Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 for a birthday. She's not fucking hopping on the sticks.

SPEAKER_01 6:20

Mate, your mum couldn't have handled Modern Warfare 2. She'd have cried if she was in the lobby. On Xbox. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 6:28

On terminal.

SPEAKER_01 6:30

Ooh, that'd be racist.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

That's what your mum would have said to me. By the looks of things, no cheers. Um, nobody in the comments is on her, is on his side, this parent's side. I'm actually sorry. Sad about that. I I hope that we'd be the freaks here, just you, me, and Julie. Uh top comment. You're the asshole. You cannot be this obtuse. You asked her what she wanted, she told you, you ignored her and did the exact opposite. Twice.

SPEAKER_01 6:54

Twice. Not just the the present, but the day. He ignored everything about it.

SPEAKER_02 6:58

Someone replied to that saying, quote, guys, my daughter told me exactly what she wanted for her birthday, and instead I did the opposite of that. I couldn't possibly be wrong, could I? Like, the way that they that this dad could have done this is say, look, we can absolutely have this like a bit of a bed rot, but we'll make it like we all make a big old pillow for in the living room, we'll have a m a snack day with the family, we'll have fucking burgers, whatever. It will be a bedrock day, and we're hanging out if that's something that is a nice middle ground between the two. Because then at least then you're not inviting fucking everybody over.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

I'm sorry, I don't think Julie needs a middle ground. I don't think Julie deserves a middle ground. I think Julie deserves if she wants a day to herself, she can have a day to herself. It's it's maybe it's sad for the parents. Maybe the parents wish that Julie would want to hang out with them. But also, maybe the parents wish that she liked pink rather than wearing black. Maybe the parents wished that she liked playing uh netball like all the other girls instead of football. But that's not their fucking problem, frankly, because Julie, in my opinion, is old enough to have her own opinions at 12 and they they should be respected. I'm not saying because it's her birthday, you know, everyone else bends over backwards. Yeah, yeah. She's not but she's not asking people she's asking for something passive. That's that's why I'm saying just let her have it. If she was asking for something active, if she was saying, Daddy, I want a big party and I want a horse, no, I I can't I can't afford that, I don't want to do that, I can't take a day off work, etc. But he is projecting activeness when she wants passiveness, and that's what really irks me about this, because I've been her, I've been her, and it is important to have recharge days. When we're at an event, you know, I I I I think similar to you, where I try and be as social as possible, I try and do all the things, I go out at night, I wake up, I'm in the green room hanging out and chatting. But if we're at an event for say a week, when it comes to that one day, I need to take that day.

SPEAKER_02 8:44

Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I recharge on my own as well. Like, and I I find that very important. Or I just doing nothing. I did say to a couple of people, if you see me at the bottom of the garden at the stagdo, on my own, I'm having a great time. I am do not come and say hello to me. I didn't see that, did you? No, I didn't actually go down. Uh I was actually social the entire time, and I was also very drunk the entire time, and it was brilliant. I had a great time. I was proud of you. I was proud of you. Uh, but yeah, like I think the recharging is very important. I think for a birthday it's worth, I was about to say it's worth making it special, but I do also agree that if she wants this, then that is absolutely fine for her to have her thing. It seems like though she does seem to have this all the time, every day. Maybe it would just be a case of because you do sometimes need to push a kid. No, that's fair. I was thinking if if you let her just get into the mindset of I'm on my own and that's all I want to do, that can be destructive. That can be I get that. I get that. You might need he went way too far the other way. He's definitely not the good guy. He was actively rebelling against her mind. That's why I'm so like salty about that. And he's a piece of shit for doing that. But I think that, yes, there are good intentions there, but it's also completely incorrect, which is why I do think that to an extent, maybe not the whole families, you know. Like when I say the whole family, it's like the two sons, the dad and the mum. And then you then say, okay, you get to pick what you know the family does on that day. Basically, we'll have your bed rock day, which you really want to have, but you do fucking have that every fucking day. So that's something a little bit different. You can have that in the living room. We will make it a, you know, comfy blankets, duvets, whatever everywhere. You can be everyone's in there, basically have a big old family PJ day. It's whatever. You can have whatever you want for dinner. That is a nice thing. You can still do that together. That's a that's a good thing overall.

SPEAKER_01 10:37

My if if if you were to come to uh uh Cool Cole's family practice, where I give all the best advice, and uh because I obviously have an experienced children and experienced father myself, I would say, look, Julie, it's your birthday, you're it's yourself, fine. But at 7 pm, we're gonna watch Men in Black 2. It's your favourite film. We're gonna watch it downstairs, we're gonna have your favourite food. If you decide not to join us, hey, that's on you, because we're gonna eat all the cake. You might as well come and give watching the film with us a try. Still introverted. I guess that's a good one. And the cousin off.

SPEAKER_02 11:13

Oh my god, fuck the fuck these.

SPEAKER_01 11:15

Exactly, the weird cousin's not there, it's just us. Oh, okay. You know, either come and watch it or don't. And it would be a bit disappointing if you didn't, but ultimately it's up to you. It's your day. But we're gonna have a good time with or without you, so you might as well come join us. And I bought you a hot chocolate machine.

SPEAKER_02 11:30

Here it is. And also, here's the one present you asked for, which probably costs about 80 quid. Here you go, Julie, on your 12th birthday. I'm not going to be a massive fucking twat and buy you a tutu instead. I would love to know the present that he bought instead.

SPEAKER_01 11:46

I would love to in the comments. Is there any other comments from OP?

SPEAKER_02 11:49

Let me see if OP. This was three months ago and they deleted their account.

SPEAKER_00 11:53

No! Oh, the ultimate spineless coward move. Stand by what you've said. That's so funny.

SPEAKER_02 12:03

Father. That is so fucking funny. Oh, and also actually, saying to get us more on uh Julie's side, of I imagine we're not already. Um it says my daughter's birthday falls on New Year's, so it tends to be disregarded never on purpose. I completely forgot about that. That doesn't matter if it's on purpose or not. You forget your daughter's birthday. You don't do that's awful. So maybe she's trained herself to quote unquote not care. Fuck the fuck the fucking living room shit fucking uh movie day off. Pillow four. Fuck that off. Judy never gets a birthday. Give that bitch a cake in bed. Doesn't fucking matter what you want, Dad, you horrible.

SPEAKER_00 12:48

Get her a new kettle. She wants a new kettle, get it for her. That's called.

SPEAKER_02 12:54

I also, yeah, this as I'm reading somebody's comment, where they say Yeah, let's see some comments.

SPEAKER_01 12:57

Let's see some comments.

SPEAKER_02 12:58

Quote, um, you're the arsehole for this, if nothing else. Brackets, it's not nothing else. Quote, me and my wife have tried to fix this and get her to open up more, but to no avail. You are a colossal arsehole for this. She has her own personality and interest that you don't think is conventional or typical. Seriously, as someone who lived through that, I cannot call you a fraction of what I want to on this sub. That is a brilliant comment. You've ignored her birthday for years. Intentional or not, you did it. This year, you actually bothered to ask how she wanted to spend her birthday. Which imagine how good that feels. Like, oh my god, I've not had my proper birthday for like four years or something. Oh my dad's asked. Like, oh my god, my dad's asked me what I want. I get, oh my god, this is great. She answered, but you decided that wasn't good and it would reflect badly on you because the family likes parties.

SPEAKER_01 13:50

Well, then play that she's a freak as well. You're not 50. Like, okay, horrible. Right. So why A-I-T-A, yes, you are.

SPEAKER_02 14:01

Yes, you are an unequivocal fucking prick.

SPEAKER_01 14:04

Yep, yeah, big prick. Uh, shall we go next?

SPEAKER_02 14:08

Yes, okay, straight on. Next one. And also, everybody, if you're enjoying this episode of officially.

SPEAKER_01 14:13

Unofficially.

SPEAKER_02 14:14

The best podcast on the internet.

unknown 14:17

If you're going to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_02 14:18

And then we then do the credits. Then we do then do the credits. Roll credits. Then it comes back to us. Make sure that you like it. Make sure you drop a comment. Let us know if Devil Dad was actually a piece of shit and that you would have. Are you on Julie's side or dad's side? That's what I want to do.

SPEAKER_01 14:42

I think if if you're on dad's side, don't sub. We don't want you. If you're on if you're on dad's side, we don't want your lot. We don't want your lot. Uh okay, good, good shout. Lovely, lovely, lovely little link there. Um, okay, is is is A H is that asshole? Is that is the H just whole? Yeah, asshole. How come sometimes it's H and other times it's A-I-T-A? Don't know, mate. Cool. Um Am I the asshole because our dog pushed over a little kid at a party? My husband and I moved to a new city a few months ago, and we met Kayla and Jeff through a friend. Last weekend, Kayla and Jeff hosted a housewarming party. Kayla insisted multiple times that we bring our dog as well, who she adores. Okay. Okay. I asked if there were going to be any kids coming, because our dog isn't trained with kids and we wouldn't be comfortable bringing her in that case. To which they said no.

SPEAKER_02 15:28

Okay, so they said there's been no children here. I love your dog. Bring your dog over. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 15:34

I presume quite a big dog as well, based on what they've said. Okay. Uh, but it hasn't said the breed yet. The day of the party, I texted Kayla to let her know that we'd be a bit late because of an appointment running long. She said that it's fine if we're late, but not to bring the dog as well, even if it doubles our travel time. Oh no, sorry, sorry, sorry. Oh, yeah, ignore that. She said that it's fine if we're late, but to bring the dog as well, even if it doubles our travel time. Oh, so she doubled down on bring the dog. Bring that dog. We need Roma. As soon as we walked into the house, we saw one of the other guests had brought their two-year-old who was walking around largely unsupervised by his parents and throwing around food. Okay. I was miffed because I was going to have to hold on to our dog the entire evening.

SPEAKER_02 16:13

That changes how a dog is at and is at a party. That dog can no longer free roam. If there's cake and there's bits of onions from burgers or whatever, you gotta keep an eye on the dog.

SPEAKER_01 16:21

Little kid shaking the raisin packet about. About 20 minutes later, Kayla came around and asked me if she could carry our dog for a while. And I could get some food. Okay, maybe a small dog then. Okay. And I could get some food in the meantime. I told her that would be fine, but to not let her down unsupervised.

SPEAKER_02 16:36

Okay. Alright. So far, the the dog owner has been, as both of us are dog owners, that has done great. They've done well, they've double checked if the dog should be there. The person who was hosting the party has said, yep, double up, bang, bring that motherfucking dog. There's gonna be no kids here. They've been great, kept it on the lead, brilliant.

SPEAKER_01 16:53

About 15 minutes later, I heard the kid crying loudly from the other side of the room and our dog whining. I rushed over to check and found the mum trying to calm him down while glaring daggers at my dog. Kayla was nowhere in sight. Apparently, Kayla thought the kid would like meeting our dog and let her down. Now we've trained our dog to approach a new person, but wait until they greet or pat her before putting her paws on them to sniff them. When someone pets her, she stands on her hind legs with front paws on the person and gives them her good old sniff test. Okay, she's a small dog, so this isn't really a concern of an adult. I agree that the the rules for dogs are different if they're big or small, of course. A hundred percent pop up and stuff.

SPEAKER_02 17:29

You own a small dog, I own a big dog. They are then they they exist in very different places, and I would not want my dog, who's German shepherd sized, to then put his paws up on people to then greet them. I would. I'd want that.

SPEAKER_01 17:41

I'd I'd love your dog to give me. You would. It would not be good. Not a little four-year-old rolling. Nor should a four-year-old my dog jump on a four-year-old either, but again, it's different. On an adult, that is okay. Uh Caleb put down our dog, told the kid to greet the dog, and then got called away by another guest meeting something.

SPEAKER_00 18:00

She's fucks off.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

Since the kid petted our dog, she put her paws on him and bowled him over. Okay. He hit his head on the floor and started crying. When I went over, the mum told me when my dog pi pushed her kid and I shouldn't be letting her go around unsupervised if I'm going to bring a dog to a house swimming party. We apologised profusely and made sure the kid was okay. Kayla came back over before we left and I told her what happened, to which she said she didn't think the dog would try to jump on the kid, but it's not a big deal because kids bump their heads all the time. That's true.

SPEAKER_02 18:31

I mean, Kayla's got a point.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

Yeah, she doesn't fall over. I was too pissed to say anything, so we left shortly after and haven't spoken to them since. Am I the arsehole in this situation? Anyone with common sense would have heeded my warning, but at the end of the day, our dog is our responsibility, and we would be on the hook if she hurt anyone or got hurt herself, which is what is making me wonder if I'm TA for trusting Kayla to handle her after she'd already misled us by telling us there wouldn't be any kids at the party and insisting we bring her despite knowing there was a kid present. Up vote bosh.

SPEAKER_02 19:02

Yeah. Disgust. So, okay, before we get to the comments, I do not think that the person who brought the dog, the dog owner, is the asshole. I d I think that they've actually done pretty much everything that they could have done to mitigate the circumstances from being bad at all. Because I think the main thing that you want to do as a dog owner in this situation is make sure that your dog is looked after and not being annoying to other people. If then the owner of the house has said, Oh, I'll look after the dog for a minute while you get food, and you've given them a strict instruction to look after the dog, then I think that you are exonerated.

SPEAKER_01 19:42

Ah, exonerated is too strong for me. So that is where we deviate. So up to that point, yeah, up to that point, are there gonna be kids there? No, I'll bring my dog there. Are you sure I should bring my dog? Yeah, definitely bring your dog. Double down that. Yeah. Brilliant. I brought the dog. I get there, there's a little kid running around, I'm really annoyed. I'm really, really annoyed. And they have right to be pissed off. Yeah. So I'm I'm annoyed there. I'm instantly in a bad mood. I know because I've been there, you know, you're gonna have to someone's gotta keep an eye on that dog. Yeah. If you're with a partner, you can trade it, but someone always basically in a public place or private public, you know what I mean. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Strangers, someone has to have eyes on your dog. However, if Kayla came up to me and said, I'll look after your dog, I there's a lot of permutations going on in my head. Is Kayla a dog person? Does she know my dog? Does she know my dog's limits? Is she aware that dogs can't eat certain things? Does she know that my dog being an animal around someone it doesn't know is more likely to misbehave? All these things were going through my mind. I wouldn't just think, oh, go on then, Kayla.

SPEAKER_02 20:39

But Kayla has said that she really likes the dog. So Kayla's met this dog lots of times to form enough of a bond with it to really enjoy the dog's company. She has then offered, the person has then also given the instruction, which was then not stuck to. The instruction was just don't put my dog down. This this entire situation said the same thing to the vet the next day as well. Please. This entire situation only hinges on the fact that Kayla deliberately not deliberately, whatever, that Kayla thoughtlessly did the opposite instruction of what she was told to do. I think that this falls entirely on Kayla.

SPEAKER_01 21:19

I don't think you can trust Kayla. Kayla has already clearly misjudged the importance of a child being there. Kayla probably thought, oh, it'll be fine. And you must have had people with Enzo who go, oh, it's fine, and you know, no, it's not fine.

SPEAKER_02 21:34

You say that. You say it'll be fine. Ah, he'll love me. It'll figure out me.

SPEAKER_01 21:39

No, he'll love me, but it's different with me, because I'm a dog guy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'll go in there. What I'm gonna do when I because I've never met Enzo, right? Which still breaks my heart. Six years. I know. So I'm gonna uh I'll probably walk straight into your house, I'll see him, I'm like, oh hi there, you alright? And I'll probably give him a little should be really close.

SPEAKER_02 21:55

Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

Yeah, yeah, get up close to him, eye contact, and then sort of like quite firmly. Stroke the pat, I'll probably pat his head.

SPEAKER_02 22:01

Probably, yeah, that's fair.

SPEAKER_01 22:03

Probably the head pat. That's okay because I'm a dog guy. I'm a dog guy. But do you hear my point though? They'll be like, I'll look after Enzo, and you're like, No, you fucking won't.

SPEAKER_02 22:11

End of the lead swinging about.

SPEAKER_01 22:12

Yeah, yeah. They're trying to be polite. They're not trying to, they're not trying to sort of put you in or him in trouble or danger, but you just know that if your dog goes stiff or if he's sniffing something, or if he sees something that you know he'll eat. I get his vibe.

SPEAKER_02 22:26

Yeah. Yeah, I can tell what he's about to do based off. I don't even know. I couldn't quantify why I know he's about to eat something. I know, and I've I've realized this, when we're walking, I would instinctively reach for a poo bag when he's still walking normally. Because I know for he's changed his gait by 1%. I know that he's about to have a poo. And I've already got a poo bag in hand by the time he's squatting. And I don't know why I know that, but I know his behaviour so intricately that I that I lock in on that. I just think that it's not the dog's fault either. Dog's actually been good here. Dog's been fine, dog has done precisely what it's trained to do. And it sounds like it's a well-trained dog as well.

SPEAKER_01 23:06

It's it's not that they've trained it to jump up. That's that's something else. Like whenever Yeah, I don't love it.

SPEAKER_02 23:11

But at least the dog is doing what it's trained to do, but I don't love what it's been trained to do.

SPEAKER_01 23:16

That is a weird well, like I say, like I while I said it's sort of accept more acceptable for a dog to a small dog to jump up. It doesn't mean I've trained my dog to jump up. When he meets someone new, we always go, Jasper, don't jump up. He won't always listen to that because he's not a robo dog and we're not perfect dog owners by any means, but we won't be like, oh, who's that? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And he will. Uh, but by no means have we trained him to do that. That's odd training, that's peculiar.

SPEAKER_02 23:40

It's okay for that dog to do that to an adult. Because this dog sounds like it's Yay. I'm imagining freeze. I guess like, yeah, sort of like the size of I don't know, what I'm really about dog breeze. What size dog would that be? About some I guess about the size the same size as your dog. Similarly.

SPEAKER_01 24:02

So Jasper, Jasper's a Bichon Freeze cross. He's a Cavachon, so um The Sean of the Bichon, and then a Cavalier King Charles. But you're your smaller dog, like a mini poodle, like a little teeny tiny, wiry little cuddly poodle.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

When it's got its hands up, it it will get to about your knee to just like your lower thigh.

SPEAKER_01 24:18

Yeah, thigh action.

SPEAKER_02 24:21

Yeah, that feels like an odd that's a great dog size to do that with. If it was a German Shepherd or like a fucking uh Romanian mongrel. Yeah, if there's any, you can't be doing it. That's that's that like that cannot happen. So this dog to me feels like it's at least at least it's a good sized dog to be doing that compared to a big dog. I still don't love the behaviour. Yeah, I don't but I don't know why. Why why is it the owner's fault in this situation? Yes, to an extent, to a very, very, very large extent, you as an owner are responsible for everything your dog does. I definitely agree with that.

SPEAKER_01 24:56

Let me let me let me double down on that then. Okay, so I bring my dog that I know doesn't like kids to a party being told.

SPEAKER_02 25:03

They didn't say that it doesn't like kids. They said that it wasn't tra it said it wasn't trained around kids. Okay, that's close enough then.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

My dog who I don't know how this dog interacts with. Okay, no, no, but that's what I'm saying, it's close enough. My dog, I don't know how my dog interacts with kids. I go somewhere, I've been told there's not a kid, there's a kid.

SPEAKER_02 25:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:21

Very rest of the day, for the rest of the day, I don't care if everyone else there says to me, I'll look after your dog. I don't care if they're a dog trainer. I'm keeping an eye on my dog and that kid. So if the the host comes up to me and says, I'll look after your dog, I'm thinking there's a kid strolling about, maybe tantruming, maybe shouting, might grab my dog's tail. I don't know how my dog is with children. And even if I did, your dog can be good with kids and still one yanked tail bite their face. You should not take your eyes off that dog.

SPEAKER_02 25:51

My hand is up, may I interject?

SPEAKER_01 25:53

Yeah, of course. That's why I stopped.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Person who owns the dog said, hold the dog at all times. Keep the dog in the air at all times. The dog owner has given the information to mitigate this exact circumstance from happening. And then not only have they put the dog down, they have then left. Caleb.

SPEAKER_00 26:13

Why did she have a dog?

SPEAKER_02 26:13

I don't know why she left that mental. Oh, so then the person who wants the dog can get food. So she's like, she was hungry. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:20

I'd still keep the dog by me. I'd keep the dog. You could scoop the dog in one hand, you can have it on a dog.

SPEAKER_02 26:28

It's annoying. It's real annoying. It's horrible. Having a dog floating there while you're then grabbing food and it's a good thing. Okay, but keep it on a short lead.

SPEAKER_01 26:35

Keep it on a short lead then.

SPEAKER_02 26:36

Below you. I agree that that would be preferable.

SPEAKER_01 26:40

But you can't give your dog to someone else who isn't a dog expert and isn't a dog expert on your dog, even though they've met, while there's a kid running about and they go, Oh my god, a mistake happened with the kid and the dog. You she's she's justified in being annoyed, but you have to suck that up and be annoyed all day. You can't then because what if the dog had bitten that child? It takes one second. It does. I'm not denying that. Yeah. But even even like even when I'm there with Jasper, I think you know, I I've I've I'm sure you've had it with Enzo, nights where he's a dickhead, where he sort of growled at me or whatever, if I've taken his bone wrong. They're animals at the end of the day, and you try and train it out of them. But when Jasper meets children, I am a hundred percent, hundred percent aware of every movement. And like my arms are always ready to in, you know, get in the way. And I'm telling Jasper, it's okay, buddy, and I'm keeping an eye on every part of his body. If I get any sense that anything's wrong, I'm politely, you know, go, oh come on, Jasper, we need to go over here. I'm not saying, oh my god, that's it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:42

And I didn't do that. I I I get that, and I completely understand that. And that is the preferable situation. The preferable situation is that the owner has the dog on a short lead, or they ask the person whose housewarming it is, I'll keep my dog, could you just grab me a plate of food? You know what I like. We're mates. Can you grab me a plate of food? I'll then eat in the corner, and it'll all be okay. That's the preferable situation. 100%. Yep. But I don't think I think that the owner, aside from them being there, they have done nothing wrong, I don't think. What do the comments think? Because we can go we can go in circles on this. What do the comments think?

SPEAKER_01 28:19

Oh yeah, I think we both put our thoughts across. Uh you're the arsehole. You trained your dog to jump up on people. Why? Why would you ever encourage or allow that behaviour? It isn't a concern of an adult. Yes, yes, it is. I don't want dogs jumping up on me, regardless of the size. I've had so many outfits dirtied up the second I walk into a house by dogs jumping up, and now I have dirty paw prints on me for the rest of the day. That's very free.

SPEAKER_02 28:42

That's a very as we said, it's good, I guess, that the dog stuck to the thing that they were taught, but I don't love that they were taught that behaviour.

SPEAKER_01 28:50

Mm-hmm. Um so that's that's the and then other people are right with that. Uh next comment, ESH? Uh everyone sucks it. Everyone sucks it. Okay, I agree, I agree. That's fair. Okay, I'm I'm alright with that. Kayla shouldn't be dictating what you do. She also shouldn't have left a child unsupervised with a dog. Tick. You should have had a backbone and said no. Since you did bring your dog, you're still responsible for her and shouldn't have left her unsupervised when you know kids were around. Train your dog not to pour at people. The mum sucks are getting mad at you when she should have been supervising her child. That's I didn't even think of that.

SPEAKER_02 29:22

Oh yeah, oh yeah, okay, you know that must be ridiculous.

SPEAKER_01 29:26

Knowing there was an unleashed dog around. All of you failed, the dog and the kid, and anything could have happened. That sums it up for me. I think, yeah, I think I'm Ash, I'm team Ash.

SPEAKER_02 29:34

I think also, I completely forgot about the mum in this situation. Me too, me too. What annoys me is when a child is also walking around unsupervised at any given event. Adults are big and also very clumsy, right? A child doesn't know what's happening a lot of the time. If they're just walking around and the mum's looking somewhere else completely, that child could slip and fall. It it's two years old.

SPEAKER_01 29:57

Especially with food. They don't pick up on cues, they don't think, oh, oven's opening, best give them some clear space. Exactly like they think, ooh, shiny thing in the opposite side.

SPEAKER_02 30:05

Yeah, and they'll just they will not be looking around. Yeah, the the mum is also the mum fucking sucks here too. Because then she's basically saying, This is completely on the dog owner, and it is not on me leaving my child alone with a dog. A dog that is been passed over to not its owner as well. Yes, exactly. I think that also the mum should have been kneeling down next to if the if this meeting was happening, whatever, the mum said, Oh, it'd be so good for the dog to meet my kid, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:31

The mum should be kneeling down, should then be so ready to put her hand just in the fucking way. If something goes wrong, you just go bang. I grab the dog, I fucking fling it across the floor. Cool, dog's bounce, it's fine.

SPEAKER_00 30:43

I'm not Zelonio fling with fucking gone.

SPEAKER_02 30:46

No, no, but if it has to, do you know what I mean? Like, if it's a dog like that and it was my child, I would I'd I'd I'd have a hand on the back of my kid because kids fucking fall over, it's two years old. And then also ready to catch, yeah. Ready to, if the dog is getting looking a little bit funky, genuinely grab and fling. Like just slide it away. Just get the fuck out of here.

SPEAKER_01 31:04

Like funnily enough, though, all of this is why it is so difficult to introduce a child to a to a dog, because what you're describing is true. However, dogs pick up on that as well. You know, as soon as you're talking about it. Nervous energy. Yeah, exactly. So that's something I again, something I, an experienced dog owner, try to factor in when Jasper, and I'm sure you do as well, when Enzo, if if any child is Do you ever let Enzo see kids? Because obviously I know he's passed.

SPEAKER_02 31:29

At one point when he was younger.

SPEAKER_01 31:31

Just just for context, just for really quick for context. So Stumpy's, correct if I'm wrong here, you adopted Enzo, he was like a Romanian street urchin. Yeah, yeah. Don't have a clue of his breed, sort of German Shepherd, sort of not.

SPEAKER_02 31:41

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big German shepherd-sized dog, trouble.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

A lot of his pu a lot of his puppyhood was sort of scrapping for food. So when you got him, fucking nightmare in so many ways. Well now he's very well trained and you're hard on it, etc.

SPEAKER_02 31:52

Um, but he is still less reactive than he was, but I'd still say he's a very reactive dog in the grand scheme of things. Doesn't like people in the house, but now I can put him upstairs, he'll bark for 20 seconds, and then he'll be quiet for five hours. Like me. Yes, sure. Um and uh yeah, at one point when he was a puppy, uh, he uh where he used to live round the corner was a primary school. It was 3 p.m., kids getting out of school, he got out the front door with no lead or anything on and ran straight into crowds of children. Oh, this is when he was like under a year old, and this is when he's at like at the peak of his reactivity. And I was like, oh my fucking god, he's about to maul a child. Um when he went out there, he was then just running between all the families, all the people across the road and stuff, really bad, like bad dog ownership ultimately, because he got through the airlock of my porch, uh-huh, got gets out, I then had to go out there, and again, you see the nervous energy. I can't be like, oh my god, Enzo, oh my god, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 32:54

You got me running away, going, What's over here? This is fun.

SPEAKER_02 32:56

Because then all of a sudden he's then thinking, Wait, what's going on? Oh my god, uh shit, and then starts biting things. I had to be really excited and then be like, oh my god, Enzo, I guess play. And I was then running around, he was running after me, running after kids. I was then shouting, like, make sure you don't pet him, let's not pet him, don't go near my dog. But then I'm looking like a fucking weirdo running around with a dog chasing me, saying, Don't touch him, and everything. There's like kids. I then eventually then um get over to him. But he just settled next to some kids that were stroking him. And then I was like, Oh, good boy, really good. Like, grab this collar and like slow, made sure it wasn't then like because he's done really well ultimately.

SPEAKER_01 33:37

But also, what you don't want is for him to then associate you being with him as oh, I was having fun until I was on my lead. Now I'm having now I'm being told off.

SPEAKER_02 33:44

Which is where recall is the hardest thing to train when a dog is having loads of fun off lead and you then call them in to then leave the place where they're having fun. You need to recall them like eight times in a walk, so then they then don't know which one is going to be the one that ends all the fun. So then all of it is fun. So yeah, so that happened. He's also got off the lead at a um uh near a lake in Milton Keynes where there's like a load of like uh like lakeside restaurants, right? And he ran into a Pizza Express. He like he got completely off lead, really busy, middle of summer. Um, I got he like slipped backwards out of his like harness or collar or something. He then ran off and he looked at me when he was off lead. I looked at him, and it it was almost like he went, see you later, fucker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then just ran, like ran the other way, was running up and down, like going into other dogs, barking at them, growling, kids, prams, two-year-olds, whatever. He then ran runs into a Pizza Express, the main bit of the restaurant, and I'm there just like shouting, again, trying to be like, God, imagine that from the diner's perspective. And then somebody coming, like all camp and excited, like, hey Doug, hey, wow, you're in it. And I'm like, come on. And I'm literally, I like run into the Pizza Express, I then run back out again, shaking his lead. He then sees me and goes, Oh my god, we're playing. This is so fun. Runs out of the Pizza Express. I then run around to like the back, he's then chasing me. He then goes like back behind. I tried to find like the smelly things so that he would like to sniff. So I went like round the back to the bins. Yeah, and then I got him back on his collar and I just sat on the floor and by the stinky fucking pizza bins.

SPEAKER_01 35:18

Someone from the Pizza Express finished right there. They were just paying. They saw this absolute crackhead running after a giant dog, and they went, Oh, I'm sure there's an explanation. Then when they got out, there was just this same person lying by the bins. They were like, Oh, he's troubled. Exhausted. He's troubled, he's troubled.

SPEAKER_02 35:34

Like, yeah, so that those that's like the most stressful thing. But thankfully, nothing bad happened those times, which is very good. But yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:39

The only time I've had Jasper escape or run away. Um he got out of the house once, and um uh I was I wasn't there, but Linnea, so I think someone across the road, in a helpful way, because they saw what was happening, sort of cooled him. Um, and I think if they hadn't, then he'd have like been very close to getting run over or something. Yeah, yeah. It was it was the the quick thinking of a stranger, or not even a strange, I think it was like our neighbour that really helped. Um, but the one time it's happened to me was when I took Jasper for a walk on his lead to our to our gym, then Linnea went into the gym, and then after that, I then went to like there's a big field outside the gym. So I then went to that big field, right, with him, and I thought, okay, Lanea's in the gym, we'll play. So I got him to sit and I let him to look at me, and I gave him a tree, and then I took his lead off, and I said, Okay, come on, let's go over this way. And similar to to you with Enzo, he looked at me, and then he just absolutely pelted round the corner to the to the to the gym, the car park of the gym, and I just went, Oh shit. So then, but by then it was too late for me to run the other way and go, come on, he was off, he was off. He wasn't in his mind anymore. So I sprinted round through the car park, and he was at the door of the gym, sort of pouring out. Oh my god. Yeah, that's the last time I've let him off there. Yeah. It's so long story short, long story short, about how good a dog owner you are, and neither of us are perfect, but we're pretty good, I like to think. You're gonna have moments, which is why I would lock this one in as everyone sucks here, but the main antagonist, unfortunately, and I hope it's a lesson that they'll learn, is the op, in my opinion, because you cannot, for a second, when there's a kid trotting about, in my opinion, leave your dog without keeping an eye on it.

SPEAKER_02 37:20

I disagree with your final conclusion. I would I'll I'll meet you at everyone sucks here. Yep. The mum, the dog owner, oh lesson, they're not fully exonerated, but I still think they're one of the more innocent people in this situation. I think the biggest asshole in this situation is Kayla. Yeah, I think you said that there wouldn't be any kids there. OP was very specific, like I don't want my dog around kids or whatever they said in a text exchange. There wasn't a kid there, you then said, I'll look after the dog, and then you've then gone against direct orders to then make it so that the dog isn't in an unsafe situation for itself and for a child. I think they had the biggest dickhead there. I think that is the worst one.

unknown 37:54

Cool.

SPEAKER_01 37:55

But let us know what you guys in the comments. Yeah, please do post comments, hit like and all that. Okay, I have got a uh a pro-revenge. So let should we say So pro revenge is when this happened to me and this is how I got this person back. This is my story.

SPEAKER_02 38:10

This this is my own back, yes. So this is just a story that happened, but we should also say, do we think they went too far? Have you read this yet? Do you think that's not? No, I've not. I've read the title.

unknown 38:19

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 38:20

But do we think the debate of this sub? I've never seen a subreddit in my life. Oh, do the people in comments tend to discuss it was too far or about right?

SPEAKER_02 38:27

No, normally they just say, That's fucking sick. Normally they're like, that's really good. Very good. Uh but let's see if they went too far. Because sometimes I've read them and then people are like, you know, I then made him get he he cut me off on a parking spot and I made him get a divorce or whatever. Well, that's not equivalent exchange. That doesn't work. Okay. So did they go too far? Pro revenge. My ex-mother-in-law sent her church friends to harass my daughters and I. I have now exposed her family to her church community, and she's getting shamed and shunned at church. Okay. So my 46F daughters, 17 and 15, have a strange relationship with my ex-husband's parents, 78 and 80. My ex passed away in an accident last year, and we've had some major family drama since due to his cheating and him leaving and him leaving two boys born with his affair partner orphaned. She also died. Good God. Alright, there's people dying all over the shop in this situation. Is that the revenge?

SPEAKER_00 39:30

Because I'd say that's too far.

SPEAKER_02 39:33

Um, part of the drama has been my ex-in-laws trying to get custody of my daughters and them also trying to live with us. First one we're going to court over, second one will never happen. Okay. So OP has got two daughters with somebody who has died. Yep. Who has fully orphaned two other different children. So four kids in total, two of which two of which are relevant, I assume, to this story. Yeah. Yeah. Uh to OP. Um, and then the parents of the guy who died are trying to get custody of OP's daughters and also trying to move in with OP and her kids.

SPEAKER_03 40:07

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 40:08

Where we live, there's a weekend market with fresh produce, eggs, meats, and other products straight from farmers. This week was extra special since it was my youngest birthday. Uh since her party is later in the month, I decided to give her a budget and set her loose on the market to get whatever she wanted, mostly chocolate and sweets. That sounds great. Nice. Yep. After an hour, I did start getting worried, and just before I called her, she called me. She was crying, saying some weird people have cornered her. I ran to her with my oldest daughter to find six older women berating my daughter for being unchristian and refusing to spend time with her paternal grandparents or for wanting to be a quote, good big sister to her poor orphaned baby brothers.

SPEAKER_00 40:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 40:48

My daughters are the ones that found out about my ex cheating and the babies, so they aren't fond of the kids. It's trauma, and they are working with this with a therapist. I got between the group and my daughter, telling my eldest to go pay for the stuff her sister had got and go to the car. Then I turned to the women, some of who some who I knew from when we went to my ex-in-laws' church, and I ripped them a new one. They told me I was worse for refusing to obey my ex's in-laws like a good Christian wife. Eventually, the screaming to uh turned too loud and we were all asked to leave the market. I met with my girls in the car, the women following me like a group of vultures. I managed to get in the car and drove away. Right, okay.

SPEAKER_01 41:29

So these six middle-aged women are baroning a 16-year-old kid for not hanging out with elderly ex-grandparents.

SPEAKER_02 41:38

Uh, their actual grandparents. The kids' actual grandparents, but it's OP's extra.

SPEAKER_01 41:44

Oh, is is the ex the dad? Is the ex their dad?

SPEAKER_02 41:46

The ex is their dad, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:47

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 41:48

And then he also then has affair children, and these kids discovered the affair. Yeah, okay. That's bad. Yep. Yep. After my girls went to bed, I got online to talk to another member of that church that I'm in, got that I'm on good terms with. I told him about what happened, and after he apologised, he told me what was going on. My ex-mother-in-law posted this massive story in the church's Facebook group about how horrible my daughters and I are, how we are leaving them homeless and penniless. They inherited my ex's personal bank account and his life insurance, and how my daughters don't even talk to them. She also accused of accused us of being the reason she lost her grandsons. The boy's now living with distant relatives of my ex-husband. Basically, it was a substory worthy of a Hallmark movie. And of course, they were getting all the love and support from the more extremist members of their church. Yeah. So they're their sympathy grabbing. Yeah, they are, they are, they are. This church and its members are a bit annoying, especially with LGBTQ plus topics, but they have a small save in grace. They are incredibly strict about cheating. So, but then didn't the ex cheat?

SPEAKER_01 42:51

So I don't understand how. So I guess that's where it's going. I guess where it's going is saying, oh, there was cheating and there was cheating a foot.

SPEAKER_02 42:58

It's a big no-no, be it from a husband or a wife equally. Now, how did she get around blaming me about a fair children without exposing the cheating? She claimed the other woman was our surrogate since I was unable to have more children. Then said I didn't want the babies because they were boys, which is absolutely disgusting to be accused of. Okay. I decided it was time to clean this mess up. And since I was mid-divorced when my ex died, I had all the evidence needed.

SPEAKER_01 43:24

And since she she was like the whole story, so the the the grandparents have been telling complete lies, saying it wasn't cheating. Well, they wouldn't say that, they just said, Oh, it's a surrogate, and then she decided that she wouldn't want them post-birth. Basically, yeah, a big lump of us, the poor old grandparents.

SPEAKER_02 43:38

Where this where OP, the bitch, is now just with her two daughters because she didn't want boys, living it up with my husband with my son's money. Yeah, exactly. Um, and since the divorce wasn't completed, I didn't have any legal ramification for releasing all the evidence. What was he gonna do? Sue you? I guess yeah, you can't sue the dog. Yeah. Um I was off the next day and went to a print shop. To get all the copies of all the delightful pictures of my ex cheating, his text conversations with his affair partner, the ones with his parents confessing to his cheating and getting support from them, my ex-in-laws harassing me about the divorce and my coup de gras, all the emails and text messages of them bullying my daughters about their baby brothers. Oh my god. In one of them, they call my daughters bastards and telling them it was all their fault their father died since they told me about the affair and I began the divorce. This was literally two days after my ex died. Oh my god. So they've been traumatizing these kids. Yeah, and they're saying your mum's a real piece of shit. Also, you killed your dad. You killed your dad, lol, because you told your mum that your dad was cheating. And now they're therapy for this.

SPEAKER_01 44:50

In in three seconds, let's say the name of the country that we both think this is in. Three. Three, two, one. America.

SPEAKER_02 44:59

Carry on, carry on. So American. Um a pay for all of this be printed in beautiful, high-quality paper. The GSM on this shit is unreal. And then when I got home, I sat down for hours to make delightfully personalized binders that look like the little prayer song packets the church gives everyone to take to sing hymns. Oh, nice. So it's a surprise. You open it thinking it's one thing. Thinking it's hymns in the in the church. That's so good. The first picture when opening the binders is my ex and his sidewoman making out in our living room. Their faces are easy to discern, and the girl looks nothing like me. Different skin tones and hair colour. Underneath I wrote ex-husband's name and a fair girl's name, love story. I took them to the church before service. There's a desk in the back with the songbooks of people that need such forget their own and they never check them. Oh my god. That is unreal. Um, the gossip mill was quick and harsh.

SPEAKER_01 46:02

Please tell me there's a picture of this somewhere. I want to see.

SPEAKER_02 46:05

Not in this main body. I'll see if then they've responded with it. Okay, I really hope so. The gossip mill was quick and harsh. The names my ex and his affair partner got called in the Facebook were so bad the pastor himself had to get involved just to keep things relatively PG. People were angry at my ex-in-laws for their abuse to my daughters, but what made me laugh was that I was still in the wrong for the divorce. But quote, it's understandable that I failed on my duties after the shock, and I possibly will one day return to the light, unlike my cheating husband and his Jezebel.

SPEAKER_01 46:39

Who are both now in hell being tortured for all eternity.

SPEAKER_02 46:42

Yes, exactly. They've just been God is like God picked up a pamphlet and was like, He went, oh myself. Jesus Christ. Yeah?

SPEAKER_00 46:57

Son.

SPEAKER_02 46:58

Bloody hell, get in here. Um they used another word I can't use here, I imagine. I got two apology letters in the mail for my girl and the invitation to join the church for support. As for my ex-in-laws, they got shamed into leaving the church. My ex-mother-in-law made a post on her wall about how alienated she feels and how no one cares for the elderly anymore. It's always like their category.

SPEAKER_01 47:24

It's never them, it's always their category.

SPEAKER_02 47:25

Yeah. Um, how she wished her quote great son was still alive since he would have taken care of her and her husband. With what money, I don't know, since I was the breadwinner. Explanation on the will. Uh, my ex-husband had a will that named his parents as beneficiaries. As far as I was aware, he had told me he had named our daughters, not them. I never pushed for me to be the beneficiary, as my own will has my daughters as the beneficiaries, not him. That is stunning.

SPEAKER_01 47:55

That is stunning. Yeah, no, I think completely fair enough as well. I I think that is uh I want to believe I always find with these stories, do I believe them? Like, do I believe it fully? That's why I want to see this picture. I want to see this picture of like, I don't know, of Sarah and Carl making out on their sofa.

SPEAKER_02 48:14

Um, no, there's not, unfortunately.

SPEAKER_01 48:17

That's unbelievable. That's outrageous.

SPEAKER_02 48:19

Yeah, but yeah, so I love how like using the hypocrisy of the church and then weaponizing that against the people that are using that to attack you. It's literally just the Una reverse card. And putting it all in the hymn books, in the song books, is so clever. I thought she was gonna print them out, put them on the walls or whatever of the church, and then walk away. But the fact that also everybody was opening it up at the same time. Oh, turn to page three.

SPEAKER_01 48:51

It's just Carl cock deep in Sarah.

SPEAKER_02 48:54

To the fucking hilt in Sarah.

SPEAKER_01 48:56

Oh man. Oh, well done. Well done, her. Very good.

SPEAKER_02 48:59

Well done, Scary Cat on Reddit. Great job.

SPEAKER_01 49:03

But she does need to post a picture immediately. This was a year ago, unfortunately. So then she better get on with it. Like she really, when I say immediately, I mean immediately. Yeah, that's fair.

SPEAKER_02 49:12

Yeah, that kind of I felt like there's there's levels to pro-revenge where sometimes you do think like, was it worth it for you to go to all of that hassle because somebody wronged you in some way? Is there also just a solace in moving on and just ignoring it? This is not that time.

SPEAKER_01 49:28

No, the the This is not that time. That's the perfect level. The best revenge story I've ever heard, I heard on the radio, where um a woman was cheated on, okay, by uh by a husband or a partner, and uh the the guy ended up with the house uh somehow and she didn't, so she had to move, right? But before she left, she stuffed a curtain pole with like, I don't know, prawns or like seafood or something so that over time the smell would get worse and worse.

SPEAKER_00 49:55

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 49:56

And he he could never figure out what it was. You know, he's sort of sort of spraying it, he got professional cleaners and it's not.

SPEAKER_02 50:00

You're not gonna check the curtain poles.

SPEAKER_01 50:02

Right, exactly. Um and eventually got to the point where he sold the house for a massive loss because that it had this unknown smell, so he put it on auction or whatever, and he got like, you know, pennies on the pound. Um the funny thing is that she saw him when he was then moving out, yeah, and he took the curtain pole with him.

SPEAKER_02 50:20

Oh my fucking god. So he takes this sloppy seafood curtain pole with him to the new house.

SPEAKER_00 50:26

So, so says the story. So, so says the other one.

SPEAKER_02 50:30

I choose at some point where you have to just choose to believe it, otherwise you become nothing ever happens guy.

SPEAKER_00 50:37

Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_02 50:37

And nobody likes nothing about that's brilliant. That is so fucking good.

SPEAKER_01 50:41

I love that.

SPEAKER_02 50:42

Alright, have you got one more Howie over at the Arsehole type thing?

SPEAKER_01 50:46

Well, this one, um, maybe sort of what we say on this one could be could be could be pertinent for the future. Okay. Maybe it was me that posted this one. Okay. Would I be the arsehole for attending a movie premiere instead of my friend's wedding? Any thoughts off the bat?

SPEAKER_02 51:03

There's situation there's very few situations where you are not the arsehole here.

SPEAKER_00 51:10

Okay, actually, before I read it, what what situation would you think would make you NTC?

SPEAKER_01 51:14

If you I guess if you're in the film, if you're in the film.

SPEAKER_02 51:16

If it's a really, really big thing for your career and you are just there as another day guest, if you are just one of the 70 day guests that are going, you can give it a miss. If somebody said to me, genuinely, if someone said that to me and they were like, look, I've got this huge thing for work, I'm really sorry, I just can't go to your wedding. I'd I would genuinely I would get it. I'd be I'd be completely fine with that. If they were part of my wedding party, if they were a groomsman of themselves, a groomsman that I record a podcast with and talk to every single day of my life of themselves. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is no fucking way they should go.

SPEAKER_00 51:54

Really? None. Stream's a stream though. I think it's like nice to keep the momentum up. Good to keep it ticking along. Okay. Yeah, exactly. We hit 35 viewers. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 52:07

I, 24 female, have known my friend, 25 male, since we were six. We went to the same elementary, middle, and high schools. Our elementary and middle school classes were around 20-ish kids, private Catholic school. So pretty much the whole class was close. Our graduating class all went to different high schools, but I ended up going to the same high school as this friend. So they know each other very well. However, we were in very different friend we were in very different friend groups. He was popular, I was not. So we didn't really keep in touch other than saying hi in the halls and stuff. For some background, I'm close friends with some of the girls in our elementary and middle school class. This friend is one of two boys in our grade that we kept in touch with. When this friend told us he was getting married, our friends immediately asked if we were invited. To me, our invites felt like a well, I have to invite them because they asked. As he told us there was already close to 300 people on the guest list. That's a big that's a big boy, isn't it? That's an expensive fucking elephant.

SPEAKER_02 53:07

Three hundred people.

SPEAKER_01 53:09

Yeah, that's that's a fat old boy.

SPEAKER_02 53:12

For reference, mine is 17 people. You sprayed together about 15, didn't you? 15 people. It's just a stagdo again, though. It's it's it's it's 70 people for the day, 130 for the evening. But we are we've we've barely hit a hundred on the evening. We've got like 30 going spare. Like I there's no world where you actually invite 300 people that you care about all of them going. You just don't.

SPEAKER_01 53:37

That's a flex number, isn't it? Yeah. That's a that's a bit like keeping up with Jones's like, oh, you had two. Oh yeah, we had 300 at ours.

SPEAKER_02 53:43

Yeah, that's bullshit. That's too many people.

SPEAKER_01 53:45

So my concern isn't really for him being upset, I'm missing the wedding, but more so for my friends being upset with me. For more context, he's the first of our group to be getting married.

SPEAKER_02 53:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 53:56

The next paragraph. The next paragraph doesn't be like. You know, you know, before this we were sort of saying, like, oh, what would actually make it fair enough a big thing for my career? And then I joked about, like, oh, I'm streams of streams. Yeah, yeah. My favourite actors, Josh Jackson and Katie Holmes, are at a rom com together. Dawson's Creek fans know how huge this is. The two will be at a screen Okay, okay. The two will be at a screening of this movie on the same day of the wedding. It's a dream to go to this screening and see their movie with them in the audio. Okay, I fucking charge my own. Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 54:28

Honestly, I I had the fucking red. Same, same, same. I've gradually lowered the pitch for because they've said apparently Dawson Creek's trying to give a shit.

SPEAKER_01 54:37

This is why uh syntax in a sentence is so important. The fact that they started that with my favourite actors, you're thinking, Wanker, if they'd started it with there's this amazing screening that once in a lifetime, you think fair enough. Anyway, um it's a dream to go to this screening and see their movie with them in the audience. There's also that small chance of meeting them before and after the screening. For more context, I met the whole cast of DC in September of Christmas Creek. But it was more of a quick 15-second group photo where I had zero time to process anyone around me. Okay. That being said, this wouldn't be my first time seeing them in person or technically even meeting them.

SPEAKER_02 55:10

Okay, it's different, but it is different. One's a little meeting group that you probably paid honestly a grand for. They they're so expensive. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:19

I feel guilty for possibly missing his wedding to go see a movie with the actors present, but I know I'd regret it big time if I didn't go. I already RSVP'd to the wedding, but have a few days before the deadline to change it. There are screenings of the movie on other days, but this is the only screening that the two actors will be at. My girlfriends also bought an Airbnb so we can hang out after the wedding, and I already paid my share, but won't be asking for it back if I do end up not going to this wedding. My boyfriend, 24 male, doesn't think it's a big deal if I miss it, but my sister, 24 female, does, since my friend's the first of us to get married. Plus I know my mom would be pretty mad at me if I didn't go, but she doesn't understand the love I have for Josh and Katie Lowell. I like the lol, bit of self-awareness. Yeah, that's fair, yeah. Okay, okay. Uh TLDR, my childhood friend that I'm not super close with is getting married in June, but my favourite actors will be at their movie premiere on the same day. Would I be an asshole for missing the wedding to go to the movie?

SPEAKER_02 56:18

I would like to hear your perspective first. As myself, a man that is in several months getting married, I have probably, I assume, a slightly different opinion to you, a different perspective, but what do you think they are the arsehole? Or would they be the asshole?

SPEAKER_01 56:34

Would they be? I think the the key thing for this is this person, what's this person's name? Um cute bozo. Cute bozo really made a point. Big Cheryl. Okay, Cheryl made a point of not knowing this person that well. They're sort of a loose friend, you know, on the edge of their friendship.

SPEAKER_02 56:51

But but was a good friend and is still one of the auxiliary friends of the friend group.

SPEAKER_01 56:57

And grew up with this person and grew up with other people that you're closer to, you know, like a seven people removed sort of thing. You might not be closer that person at the other end of your friend group, but you're closer to this person, close to that person, closer to that person. You are expected to be there. Or your mates will be there. I would say, in all seriousness, they are the asshole. I think you should go. Doesn't matter if there's 300 people invited, you're one of them. Uh you're part of that cluster of friends. If it was like a colleague, if it was just a colleague and they're like, Oh, we had some spare invites, do you want one? Oh no, thank you. I've got plans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm part of a big friendship group. Yeah. You know, and in my in my group, there's people that I'm really, really super tight with and others that I don't see quite as much, but we get on at a barbecue, you know? They'll still be invited as a part of the group. You're gonna have different levels, and for like stags and weddings, it's sort of assumed that everyone in this sort of Facebook chat that we've had since 2011 is probably gonna be. It's a it's a statement if not. Yeah. And it's a statement not to go. So I'd say based on that, I think this person would be TA. But you're smirking.

SPEAKER_02 57:56

I cannot believe that we disagree in this in this way. I cannot believe that we disagree. So uh I think that if they don't go, they have done everything right. They have said as soon as they mentioned the Airbnb, and they said, I'll pay for it regardless. Cool, you're tick, done, fine. That that you are you are good in that scenario.

SPEAKER_01 58:19

So no one no one gets screwed over.

SPEAKER_02 58:21

No one gets screwed over by you being late, not even indecisive, but changing your mind. Like nobody gets screwed over in that situation. Um very importantly, they have also and they will be changing the RSVP before the RSVP date is is ended, right?

SPEAKER_01 58:38

That has a big is that is that set by the wedding venue then? Do they say anything after this date is paid for or what? How does that work?

SPEAKER_02 58:44

Essentially, yeah, they say like it's say it's a no uh six weeks before normally it's like final payments for stuff. They'll then say just lock in your um uh your uh guest list, including, bear in mind, eating options, um any like disabilities, whatever, uh any like special things that people might need extra um on top, any fucking gluten intolerances, they'll need to then buy X amount of these things for the thing.

SPEAKER_03 59:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 59:08

Um it sounds to me like they're not that, but that's just kind of I guess what they um put in there for. If someone changes their RSVP for my wedding, I would be more hurt because there's only 70 people going to my day. Yes. Three hundred people going to their wedding is so many people that's such a big room. You can't a meal after that. You genuinely can't speak to all of them. Because then a minute chat to every one of your guests is then like five hours. That's so long, you cannot talk to all of them. It's so impersonal when you get to that amount of numbers. You're not important to the proceedings of the day. They're an audience, you're in the audience, yeah, exactly. Like you you won't be visible to them, there won't be an empty seat where you were meant to be because people will just move up one. Like, I think like it's not a close friend, it's somebody else. What I would say, if you can go to any part of the wedding, I would I would do that. If it if it's like you know, a four-hour flight away, you can't do it. Cool, fine, you're out. I I'd I go to the premiere. I really would say go to the premier because it's it's this situation specifically that you're so unimportant to the day that you just you would regret missing this more, you'd regret missing the movie premiere more than you would regret going to the than you'd regret missing the wedding.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:40

Now don't get me wrong, so selfishly I agree with that. But I'm I'm just it's it's the it's the long-term statement that you've made and set. I'm assuming that this is her friendship group, and this person is in her friendship group, and they'll put on the you know the group WhatsApp, like, hey, anyone, you know, come in for this drink tonight or whatever. Once you detach it, once you recuse yourself from that for something that wasn't set when the wedding was, you it's not like, oh, I I would love to, but I've already chosen to do this thing, I've already committed to this thing, I've already bought my tickets. Which I do have the opportunity.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:11

Would you say that they also wouldn't be a bad guy if they had if this is if the premier had come before the wedding invite?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:17

Zero percent. Yeah, that's completely fair. You say, look, I'm already done this once in a lifetime thing, uh, you know, you wouldn't say this, but you're not my best mate. You cannot be done if I'm not there. I'm one of 300.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:27

We know where I sit and that's okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:30

Yeah, so I think that'd be completely fine. However, actively choosing this once you've already said yes over the wedding is more of a statement. Would you be able to because I presume these people get on, right? You know, Cheryl and um Bill, Bill who's getting married. If Bill then the next week, you go, Oh, you sorry, you un RSVP'd to go to this thing instead of my wedding. It changes things. It's more of a statement. It's more of a statement.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:54

It changes things, and basically you need to say to yourself, would it be worth it? To me, as a creek head of myself in this situation, as a real creekhead, Sarah Holmes and Jason Donovan being in the same event um at the same time. I would be. Oh, it's Josh Jackson and Katie Holmes. I'm not Jason Donovan.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:18

No, who is he?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:19

I don't know. He's like an Australian bloke that was on Armored Celebrity about 20 years ago.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:23

Oh, good for him.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:24

Um I think that I think you're fine. I really do think you are fine not going to the wedding. You just have to accept the consequences. Because there will be consequences. You'll be looked at like a dick. You will be. People will think, fucking hell, mate. Really? You went to fucking see two people from Dawson's Creek for a rom com film premiere. So it's not even about Dawson's Creek. Really? You then have to be like, yeah, I know. It's just I love it. And yeah, and yeah. Yeah, that's fair. You have to own it. Whatever you do, you can't then be regretful afterwards. You have to own it.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:58

Well, let's see what the people said. Yeah, we are sold. Your favourite actors don't care that you attend the premiere. Your friend cares about whether you attend their wedding. Do they? There's 300 people. Op replied and said, said this to another person, but of course the actors don't care. I don't expect them to. Yeah. And as I said in my post, I don't think my attendance or lack thereof would make a difference to my friend since we aren't close and the guess this is huge. Thank you for your input. Seems fair enough.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:21

Yeah, I agree with OP on that, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:24

Your favourite actors are Josh Jackson and Katie Holmes. YTA.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:29

You love Dawson's Creek. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:31

Then a cute cute bozo said this made me giggle lol, and it was on minus four. I'll give it an upvote. That's a very that's funny. Yeah, that's playing along. Are they not the RC? You are SUP and now you want to ditch the wedding. I wouldn't be your friend after that.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:45

I would think of them differently. I'd definitely be like, mate, really? Fucking hell. Well, like, I thought we were closer than that. But then obviously you don't. You don't think you're closer than that, because you're one of 300. Does anyone agree with me?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:59

What's YWBTA? You would be the arsehole.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:02

Okay. I also hate when there's all these fucking.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:05

I know. Fuck off, Reddit. Uh genuinely, I'm scrolling. I don't think anyone has said not. Wow. You literally risk losing this friend if you are okay with that for a movie, then you do you. Yeah, there's consequences.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:19

Which to me, you it feels like a worthy consequence.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:24

Yeah. Which also, I get. I get. Everyone is like fully against this person. I'm not fully against this person. I totally like understand. Ah! Oh come on. Flow to Ebb to Flow. Seven hours ago. Come on. Not the arsehole. If the reason you want to go is because of your friends and not because of the groom, that's a great point. That tells me all I need to know. He's not important to you, and you can choose your own interests over someone not important to you. Yeah, fair. That's genuinely the only not. Um final post from OP. Thank you all for your comments. I think I've replied to mostly everyone, and to be fair, this person has fair play. Okay. Down vote's gonna be one. Um Yeah, yeah. And I'm getting a bit tired of it, so I think I'll stop here. But I do really appreciate the input. I do also think some of you are reading the title and not the story, and assuming this is about a close female friend. It's not. But for those of you who actually read and said something in substance, thank you. But they didn't say what they're gonna be doing. No, I I think um I think they are gonna be going to the film. I think they're going to the film. At which point, decision made, so no point ganging up.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:26

Yeah, I think so. I'd love to know. Anybody listening does anybody agree on something? Like please go in. Yeah. If anybody agrees with me, please let me know. I'm amazed that we land at different sides of this. Me too. Not by much, because I know that you're sort of like slightly towards the wedding, go to the wedding instead, would you say, or are you more strong?

SPEAKER_01 1:05:50

To to to to this one. Um I I think you're locked into the wedding, unfortunately.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:53

If even if you don't want to go, grit your teeth and bear it, sucks. What if they did then change their mind to then go to the wedding, I wouldn't be like. You fucked it. You idiot. You fool. I've like, oh you know what? Fair play. You've then picked the other thing. That's also okay. I think just go to the thing that makes you happier, but then just accept that there will be negative consequences for your friend group.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:12

Yeah, I I think as as a man from a large historical friend group of of school.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:16

As I am too, though, bear in mind. Oh yeah. Is yours still a big boy? Yeah, very much so. Like most of the people on that stag were like uh from that friend group. We've known for like 20 years, there's like the group is about 20 odd people.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:27

But again we're not gonna die going into gone.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:30

I was gonna say, but then we like we'd invite the group to things, and if you can't go to a thing, it's not held against you. A wedding is different, obviously, but it's not held against you.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:39

It was so funny, um, sort of uh yeah, because I went to this stag and I'd sort of met the people, a few of the people there a couple of times, but it was you know mostly you that I knew well. And a couple of times people sort of said to me, like, Oh, what's what's his name? Is that you know, is that Ryan or is that James? I'm like, obviously you know that. You've known this person for 25 years, because in my mind, they all know each other.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:59

You're the only one coming in.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:00

Yeah, exactly. But actually, there were like was it was it like two main chunks of people uni chunk and school chunk? Was it four groups?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:07

What was the other two then? It was three from uh my unigroup. It was then you are you're your own group. You make up.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:14

I was the only one of me.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:15

I was the only one of me. There was two up north uh friends, uh, and then the others, then there was like probably about eight or nine from the main group at home. So it was like four groups, but there was one main group essentially.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:28

Um well they were all very nice and welcoming and handsome. And um we went to uh we went to uh Ninja Warrior Stoke and vouch vouch 12 quid for 12 quid. I know you get to bounce about in the bouncatorium for an hour. In the inflatable thing is, yeah, like inflatable as hell and you're sort of barging through the boying easy and stuff like that. Really good. Um and then after that you do the actual Ninja Warrior stuff with like the monkey bars and stuff. Really good fun. Very good fun. Really, really good. Enjoyed it very much and enjoyed hanging out with all your mates and racing and pushing each other over and stuff like that. I felt a sense of childhood wonder. Good. That was the vibe. I must admit, because I must admit.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:09

There was like us that was like between 31 and 37, and then every other person there putting on spray, putting on knee pads, stretching. Oh, yeah, we were stretching in the lobby because everyone was so worried about pulling something. Every other person was either a parent or eight years old. That that that was that was the difference.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:29

Which surprised me because it's sort of quite it can be quite an adult activity. Do you know what I mean? I I th I thought they were gonna shut it for us for an hour and we paid for that, and we were gonna be wrestling and stuff. But honestly, like we were falling over, then you'd look up, and a little kid was like two inches away from you.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:44

I threw a child off a thing. Did you see me throw a child?

SPEAKER_00 1:08:48

No, I saw I saw Sam chuck one, you know, the batons that you fight each other with. I saw him chuck one of those up when this kid was crossing and catch him in the face. Yeah, it was on that hook.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:57

I then climbed up, and then there was a kid in front of me, and I wanted to have a fight. So I just literally picked him up and threw him off the edge and he landed on the inflatable thing. Then he then laughed. His mate, I then felt him pushing me. So I thought, let's make a memory here for them. I then did like the Hollywood full like jump.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:16

Maybe I did see that.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:17

I then jumped off backwards, then fell off. And then he went, yeah, and he like cheered that you pushed the big guy off. And it was all very funny. It was lovely, it was really good. But yeah, so hence my voice is hoarse. Um, and everybody. My spirit is high. My spirit is high. And this was episode number. Oh, I want to say 27. Let's go, 27 then. 27. Officially.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:36

Unofficially.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:37

The best podcast on the internet. Thank you all. Make sure that you drop it a follow, drop it a subscription. Um we are racing to 1,000 subs so that we can get this shit monetized. It'd be very appreciated. If you can do your part, check us out on all the shorts, on the socials, on YouTube, on Instagram, on uh TikTok, everywhere that there is a socials thing, uh, we probably are. So make sure you give it a look. Thank you all. I do we. Are we all good? Yeah, piss off. Lovely. Cheers, everyone. Goodbye.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:03

Oh, actually, final thing. Uh the one that I'll link will be the other Reddit one we've done rather than the previous episode. If you like this, click wherever the hell it is for the previous Reddit one that's like this. Yeah.