Kindergarten... JK APRIL FOOLS DAY BRACKET!

Did we trick you? Did we trick you fools?

It's just a goof off with Nas as the Apryle Foole drops by with a twisted movie challenge.

Transcript

SPEAKER_06 0:00

So when my wife and I first met, she's like, oh, I was at this bar. It was awesome. It was called Barcade. And I was like, oh, what what where is it? Is it? She's like, oh, there's one in Brooklyn, there's one on Laurie's side. I was like, oh, it's like a chain. I was like, what's their thing? And she's like, oh, you know, they have good cocktails. Um, they use four roses bourbon as their house. And they have a bunch of pinball machines. And I was like, oh, is it Barcade you're thinking of? And she's like, no, no, it's Barcade. It's Barcade. Little did I know. She was talking about Barcade. But I was like, don't you think it should be called Barcade? Because it's a bar and an arcade. Barcade? It is called Barcade.

SPEAKER_03 0:40

That's exactly what it is.

SPEAKER_06 0:43

Do you think that the owner could be like a caging guy though?

SPEAKER_07 0:45

And he's like, no, I don't call Barcade.

SPEAKER_04 0:48

When you s when I I learned I learned you weren't a real New Yorker when you said she described it as a bar where there's a lot of pinball machines and you didn't say, uh, sun sun sun dry cleaners. Um, which is the laundromat um barcade.

SPEAKER_06 1:05

Oh yeah. Well I was like, oh, let's go to Rayos. Yes. Yeah, and then I was like, let's go to Rayos on um uh Houston Street.

SPEAKER_04 1:14

Rayos is closing down. Did it already close down?

SPEAKER_06 1:16

Yeah, did it close down? Really? I knew that you had to like have a member. Don't you have to have like a membership to go to it? Like, you have to be like a billionaire. You know this. Greek? You're Greek?

SPEAKER_03 1:24

What why would I fucking know? Because Greeks know all the shit about Greek.

SPEAKER_04 1:27

And Greeks are basically Italians. That's true.

SPEAKER_03 1:31

That's actually true.

SPEAKER_06 1:34

We got you. I've been to your parties.

SPEAKER_03 1:37

Here's the thing: don't ever eat Greek spaghetti though. Even though culturally they're quite similar overall, Greeks did not take any of the spaghetti lessons.

SPEAKER_06 1:48

I have a question about Greeks. Do they have a room in their house where they put like fur um plastic covering on the furniture and they're like, you don't go into this room?

SPEAKER_03 1:56

Well, yeah, I mean, first of all, uh in the 80s and 90s, yes, but I think that was kind of a lot of uh at least immigrant families that I, you know, I also went to their houses too, not specifically Greek. Okay. Like the plastic covering was a very much like a 70s, 80s thing, protect your investments, yeah, and you would like you would like open presents in that room, you know, and then like you wouldn't go there for the rest of the year. Yeah, well, yeah, I don't I think it would just be like the living room would just have plastic everywhere because also don't forget, like, and it wasn't that long ago, everyone was a fucking degenerate smoking and dropping ashes everywhere. Yes, actually, I didn't even think about it. So at least the plastic was one preventative layer from your entire couch going up in flames.

SPEAKER_04 2:47

Yeah. I did have at least one or two friends, and at their house they had like a room with a velvet like cord up, like a velvet rope, and they were like, oh, that's like our that's our like event showroom.

SPEAKER_06 3:02

Do they have like a giant guy that would like lift up the rope to like let you in?

SPEAKER_04 3:05

Not at that time because it was closed off. But like for there, that would be the one like that where you would have Christmas party or like something like that.

SPEAKER_03 3:12

Is that like a fun bit that they were doing with the velvet rope, or like they were not a little bit of a few years? It was just like seriously.

SPEAKER_04 3:17

Yeah, you don't go in that room unless it's because it was plastic on the furniture, all the antiques in there, really nice carpet.

SPEAKER_06 3:23

Um You don't go in that room unless the room goes to you.

SPEAKER_04 3:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 3:27

It'll ask you, you'll feel it. You had a point about uh but what? Greeks and oh, I was just wondering like if Greeks and Italians were super similar. I could see it.

SPEAKER_03 3:38

Yeah, I mean, you know, loosely Mediterranean vibe.

SPEAKER_06 3:42

Yeah. Um kind of like neurotic sometimes.

SPEAKER_04 3:44

The gods, you guys worship the same gods basically.

SPEAKER_03 3:48

There's a god for everything.

SPEAKER_06 3:49

Yeah, the Romans got they stole them from they did steal them. Oh my god, dude, at this Greek party, this the guy that was hosting it was like doing the thing where he was like my big fat Greek wedding, where he was like, Oh, and actually, if you think about it historically, Hellenic culture influenced America in the 19th century and caused them to do the civil war to free the slaves.

SPEAKER_03 4:14

So this is I would say the spirit of that is actually very accurate because so I went to um I went to Greek American school, which is like you do English lessons, most of your schools that in your most of your classes are in English, but then there's like the Greek portion of the day and very famously uh Abraham. Yeah, many of the Greek faculty would you know, a bunch of stolen valor kind of stuff. Um, you know, Christopher Columbus was Greek.

SPEAKER_06 4:47

Um what though that no, no, dude, the Italians, they ha that's the that's all they have.

SPEAKER_03 4:52

Hey, I'm just telling you what they tried to program our little child brains.

SPEAKER_06 4:56

Whoa, okay, so Christopher Columbus and Abraham Lincoln?

SPEAKER_03 4:59

I don't know about Abraham. Well, he maybe Abraham Lincoln, but yeah, there was this whole thing of like recognize Hellenic culture even when it was never there. Also, sometimes when it was there, but like a lot of times it was like just really misappropriated stuff. That's wild. I love it. I love Greek people.

SPEAKER_04 5:21

Two questions. Windex?

SPEAKER_03 5:24

That's fake.

SPEAKER_04 5:24

That's fake.

SPEAKER_03 5:25

Fake news.

SPEAKER_04 5:26

Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 5:28

Completely that's made up.

SPEAKER_04 5:31

And then other question Are women really so hairy?

SPEAKER_06 5:40

Yeah, back it up, girl. That's that I guess is true though for both Italian and Greek. Yeah, why do Italian men grow mustaches? Why? So they can look like their mother.

SPEAKER_04 5:52

Welcome to Squequels. It's a sequel podcast. It's also a lifestyle podcast. Uh, we believe every movie deserves a sequel. We believe in the great overarching power of the voice. Yes, and we believe that the power to gump up lies within us all. Yes. Every week uh we come in with a movie, we pitch three possible sequels to that movie, and then on this week, the the opposing, the the secondary week, we read that sequel. Uh this week we are getting into kindergarten cop, or our sequel kindergarten class pet. Oh shit. Who's that figure at your window? Hold on. A dark image, a dark silhouette?

SPEAKER_06 6:40

Open the window, one, two, three, and the April fool you'll soon to see. I guess we should open the window. I wouldn't open that window. Oh, I've been unleashed, ooh, is this the Squeak Who's podcast?

SPEAKER_04 6:56

You don't talk like that the whole time.

SPEAKER_06 7:01

Try as I will, try as I might.

SPEAKER_04 7:03

The April Fool has arrived by night. Shit, it is night, and that arrived. Um, hello, April. I guess it is April Fool's Day, wasn't it? It is, it's coming up! No, it's right now.

SPEAKER_05 7:19

Yes, and I've got a big red rocket just thinking about my favorite day.

SPEAKER_03 7:26

I think this guy's a little weird.

SPEAKER_04 7:28

Yeah, he's a little twisted. Well, you know what comes before April? What's that? Marzo. Oh, we were talking about the Greek and Roman gods. Marzo, uh, the god of famously of uh war.

SPEAKER_05 7:46

Yes, war and hand jobs.

SPEAKER_06 7:50

Anyway, the real point is that March is the month of insanity. I did not know that.

SPEAKER_04 8:01

I guess it is Pisces season, which uh my girlfriend got a little crazy.

SPEAKER_06 8:07

Oh yes, my girlfriend Harley Quinn is also quite crazy.

SPEAKER_03 8:14

Wait, are you the Balatro guy?

SPEAKER_04 8:16

That's me, Ballatro B. Your deep lore already established here. Wait, so what comes before April is March, right? Yes. Famously. Famously. It's the month of madness.

SPEAKER_06 8:33

Oh, I see, like March Madness. That's exactly right.

SPEAKER_04 8:37

I'm also a fan of the NCAA. I I've often heard the adage, um, if April Fools brings March Madness, what does March madness bring? And I guess it's an NCAA bracket, right, buddy?

SPEAKER_05 8:56

You got it right! Yes, I'm here. I've I've uh I've I've sequestered your podcast.

SPEAKER_06 9:02

I've got Jude's mouth shut, and I'm jerking him off with the other hand that's not holding his mouth shut, and I'm giving you a movie bracket.

SPEAKER_04 9:12

This is some foolish activity.

SPEAKER_03 9:14

Can you just stop vaping? It's just really hard for me to even see you.

SPEAKER_06 9:19

That's natural smoke that comes out of my nostrils. I vape out of my books.

SPEAKER_04 9:24

That's crazy.

SPEAKER_06 9:25

Yes, okay.

SPEAKER_05 9:26

I need to stop talking like this. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 9:29

I wish you would.

SPEAKER_06 9:30

I'm going to leave my brackets and go leave from once I came.

SPEAKER_04 9:36

It's crazy that the April fool just appeared so suddenly like a record scratch in the middle of my sentence.

SPEAKER_06 9:45

Oh my god. That was crazy.

SPEAKER_04 9:47

Jude, you came so much.

SPEAKER_06 9:50

Yeah, and I'm not. Well, yeah, it's been a it's been a minute.

SPEAKER_04 9:55

Right. Because your wife is pregnant.

SPEAKER_06 9:57

Yeah, exactly. That's why I'm full of cum. I'm young, dumb, and full of cum. She's like, there you put too much cum in me already. No more, Jude. Yeah, this sh this shall not pass. Yeah. Said the mucus barrier that's separating the fetus from the cum.

SPEAKER_04 10:13

Jude, what is that what is that image that the that the Apriel fool scrawled onto your chest with his dagger?

SPEAKER_06 10:21

Well, judging from judging from the file name, it's ChatGPT image, March 23rd, 2026, 11 underscore 52. It's a movie bracket.

SPEAKER_04 10:31

Of course that that wicked fool would use generative AI.

SPEAKER_06 10:36

Did he also forward it to you fellas?

SPEAKER_03 10:38

Oh, yeah, actually. He just airdropped me a photo of it's either his elbow or his nutsack.

SPEAKER_00 10:45

I'm not sure. Oh, this says movie madness.

SPEAKER_06 10:51

Okay, so how does this work? Alright, so basically the April Fool, he dropped me a line in my DMs, and he said, You have to pick your favorite movie, and they're gonna fight. Now the issue is that there's sixteen movies, and they're all divided into four different categories. The categories are horror, romance, thriller, and comedy.

SPEAKER_04 11:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 11:12

I like all those. Okay, so we have to discuss in power rank our favorite movies, and at the end we're gonna make the two fight.

SPEAKER_03 11:20

How do they fight?

SPEAKER_04 11:21

Uh with In a kindergarten class, with all the accoutrement available to them.

SPEAKER_06 11:27

With all with all the metal rulers you can imagine.

SPEAKER_04 11:30

So this is just favored movies?

SPEAKER_06 11:32

This is I was thinking about doing like letterbox scores, but I don't know. I think it should be we decide. Yeah. Yeah. Not the people. Um, so usually in March Madness, are you guys b fans of the tournament? What what is that? Colleges use student athletes as a reason to get money for our marketing materials. And they pay them lots of money now, and they have them join their programs, and they get together, and a group of shadowy figures ranks all the teams. A cabal. A shadowy cabal? A cabal. A cabal. They all get together, and in between orgies, they rank all the teams one through 64, and then they have a big tournament, and then they have different regions in the tournament, and then they put like 16, 16, 16, 16, whatever, and they make them fight. And then at the end you have a champion. And they've been doing this for like 50 years. Dude, what's the Big Ten? The Big Ten is one of these regions, these athletic regions. Okay. So they've got the Big Ten, you've got the ACC, you've got the SEC. You used to have the Pac 12, but you no longer have the Pac-12, they got rid of it. Because West Coast stuff is gay.

SPEAKER_04 12:52

The SCC won't let me be, so everybody. Yes. Follow me.

SPEAKER_06 12:56

That's a different SEC. That's a security and exchange commission. Okay. But we're thinking of the Southeastern Conference. Okay. They also won't let me be because I haven't paid my dues to the University of Alabama for all the arson that I did. Anyway. They basically have these tournaments. There's there's the uh Atlantic 10. There is the Big Ten. There's lots of tens. There's actually a big 12. Is there a little 10? There's there's no little 10, but they should consider it.

SPEAKER_03 13:26

Or at least a regular 10.

SPEAKER_06 13:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:28

I'm pretty sure this is.

SPEAKER_06 13:29

Because it's like big in in comparative to what?

SPEAKER_07 13:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 13:34

There's the Sun Conference. And then there's the Patriot League. Is any of this necessary to what we're gonna be doing? Not at all.

SPEAKER_04 13:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 13:44

I like the Patriot League. Alright, so we're gonna imagine that each one of these segments here, this is all from the April Fool, this isn't from Jude. Um is like a different zone. So like horror is like the SEC. You know, romance is like the ACC. Thriller is like the Big Ten. And comedy, let's call it the Pac-12. Because all funny stuff comes from gays. So we have to pick this and and randomly or assign a fight thing.

SPEAKER_04 14:14

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 14:16

That's probably the body.

SPEAKER_04 14:17

No, it's probably the April Fool. The April Fool. The April Fool. Yeah, I guess we're way you know, we're like going crazy. Jude had a crazy story.

SPEAKER_06 14:26

Yeah, dude, okay that he was telling me pre-pod, and I said save for the pod. So there's this blog I subscribe to. It's called Defector, and it's amazing. It's basically there was a blog called Deadspin that got bought by Gawker, and they got bought out by like a private equity firm or whatever, and all the writers said, fuck you, bitch, gonna leave. They started their own private um collective journalism thing. It's similar to like Hellgate kind of like the same model. Um and they they write articles about mostly about sports, culture, all this other shit. And they wrote an article about Grammarly, and the writer of the article mentioned Tyler, who is like a very famous and sexual and beautiful advertisement that Grammarly did.

SPEAKER_04 15:11

It was like one of Grammarly's like most famous, most successful ad campaigns featuring, yeah, like an Adonis figure.

SPEAKER_06 15:20

An Adonis figure, myself.

SPEAKER_03 15:23

I know about those.

SPEAKER_06 15:25

Okay, yeah, anyway.

SPEAKER_04 15:26

You're sitting at the feet of Tyler.

SPEAKER_06 15:30

Yeah, yeah. It's Radiant. Yeah, I'm I'm actually Radiant. I'm a golden god.

SPEAKER_04 15:35

Um what you might not know, and what I just need to remind listeners of, is that uh there's like a eugenics uh German on YouTube who did a whole deconstruction of Tyler from Grammar LinkedIn.

SPEAKER_06 15:49

Yeah, but YouTube channel's called like Raiding Guys or something. Okay. And about how Tyler is like the uh He's the epitome of like a uh a beta. He's like, look at his pussy face. Yeah, he is he's like the antithesis of the masculine ideal. Yeah. He's like, look at him subjugating to his boss Anita. He'll never write an email to her, and they will never copulate because of his weak sperm. That's like pre like that could have been a line from it.

SPEAKER_04 16:20

Um, but somebody had something nice to say about this.

SPEAKER_06 16:23

No, they just wrote about it. They were like, you know, but because Grammarly is basically like using AI models, and basically Grammarly said I was like, oh, we're we're gonna use um like Stephen King's writing techniques to like edit your writing, but like you obviously can't mention that, right? Because it's like saying, Oh, we're gonna take Stephen King's on writing. I mean the balls on these people is exactly, and I think that's that's what the article was basically saying on Defector, but they mentioned Tyler and I reached out and I'm like, Oh, I'm Tyler from Grammarly, like what's what's up, you know? And they responded, and they were like, Oh, um, we're trying to do advertising for Defector. They're like, Will you shoot a commercial for us, like a fake commercial? Like, this is Taylor. Taylor thinks that Grammarly sucks or whatever. Like, Defector is amazing. And I was like, Yeah, dude, I'll do it for whatever. And they were super nice. Um, so we're trying to like work out the logistics of it, but they have really good pop culture writers and sports writers, and we should try and get them on the pod, is the point.

SPEAKER_04 17:23

It is crazy. I did just get a casting call for Defector, and it says they're looking for a Jude Flannelly type for character Taylor.

SPEAKER_06 17:34

They never will. You'll never fuck like Jude. You'll never be hung like this.

SPEAKER_04 17:40

Have you ever just very quickly, because I think there was a moment where I went into a casting and your face was used as one of the um like reference photos for like type they were looking for. Wow. And I like took a picture and sent it to you. Um, which was very funny. Um, also, my friend Paul Gayette is like a he does a lot of voiceover work, and I got a voiceover thing that was like voice types we're looking for. Paul Gayette, and I was like, he's not a famous actor. Ask him to do your commercial. No, Paul's.

SPEAKER_06 18:15

How does that work? I don't know. I think like the commercial thing is like it's like five middle-aged women that all could be confused for each other that have like different offices, and they don't you ever don't don't case about these women.

SPEAKER_04 18:32

No, there is Stacey Gallo is a queen, Beth Melski. I love me.

SPEAKER_06 18:37

They literally are using the same. There's literally people I'm thinking of. It's like, yeah, uh Liz Lewis.

SPEAKER_04 18:45

Yes, Liz Lewis casting. How dare you? Uh they're all amazing. I want to have and they all are distinct and beautiful in their own way. And I hope when you see me, I look distinctly different than Jude. You do, you do. That like sets us apart because when we're in the room together, I I get a bad feeling in the pit of my stuff.

SPEAKER_06 19:07

I think magic things can happen when we're in the room together. I always said, like, dude, we should do our own Mario and Luigi movie. He's already wearing the green suit. Yeah, dude, we should do the movie where they fuck.

SPEAKER_04 19:18

Yeah, that's somebody had something nice to say about Tyler, which is a nice change of pace. Well, they were like Because I feel like the internet has gotten on the side of that.

SPEAKER_06 19:27

But they did say the thing. Um They did say the thing where they were like, Oh my god, you really captured that pussy so well.

SPEAKER_04 19:37

We didn't expect you to be bold enough to reach out to us.

SPEAKER_06 19:40

Yeah, exactly. They were like, damn, wow. No, but I told them I was like, hey, I played Tyler, and I'm a huge fan, because I've been subscribing to them for like five years. And I was like, I'm a huge I feel I read all your articles, and they're like, that's pathetic. They're like, oh, I can't believe Tyler from Grammarly is a fan. But like their main guy, or one of the main writers, I think the CEO is his name's David Roth, and he they they shared it in their Slack group, and he said, flannelly sounds like my closet. Oh, because he wears a lot of flannels. That's really good. Yeah, but we should ask if he wants to be on the podcast. I think he would be.

SPEAKER_04 20:15

Yeah, let's ask everybody if they want to be on the podcast. This is not me being facetious. It's like I've been scheduling, you know, all of our all of our sit-ins and our guests, and uh I would love you to do one fucking thing for this guy.

SPEAKER_06 20:30

That's what I'm trying. I'm honestly I'm trying. I'm really trying. I'm trying to get some big fish in here.

SPEAKER_03 20:34

Um did Danny DeVito ever get back to you?

SPEAKER_06 20:37

No, no, he's he's a bitch. His Quando did though.

SPEAKER_04 20:42

Quando is that what it's called? Quado? His Quado. Yeah. Quaddo, Quado, Quado, Quado. Then will you grow out my skin? Um you need to be reined in. You're out of control, mister. When dead I'm going crazy. I'm letting you run this episode, and I'm fucking I'm going, I'm taking on the Jude role.

SPEAKER_05 21:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:04

When they called you pathetic for being a lover of Dead uh Deadspin, not what's Oh, actually, it's the wrong thing.

SPEAKER_06 21:11

It's actually called Defector. If you had actually done your research and prepared, go back and do that line again. See, I'm Jordan now.

SPEAKER_04 21:19

This does sound like me. When when they called you pathetic for loving defector, did you pull out your dick and start jerking off? No. Like Tyler the Cuck.

SPEAKER_03 21:28

I don't say yes. He won't obviously. Yes, I did.

SPEAKER_06 21:31

I pulled out my penis erotically and started to touch it with the intention of producing sperm. Um, Tyler the Cuck creator. Yes. And Earl Scum shirt.

SPEAKER_04 21:48

All right, let's get into this bracket.

SPEAKER_06 21:51

Yes. Okay, so where should we start? Should we start in the horror section? So should we go over the movies first? Let's go over the movies. I'm the only one that's acting professional today. This is ridiculous.

SPEAKER_04 21:58

Let's go over just so we're not overwhelmed. Let's do each bracket at a you know at a time.

SPEAKER_06 22:04

Okay. So horror. So keep in mind, I wanted to do this like movies that start with the and like movies with Gary Busey in them, but I decided it would just be easier if it's genre. So for horror, we have The Thing is playing the Shining, Rosemary's Baby is playing Alien, and they're seated. So the thing it I'm sorry, the Shining is one, the Thing is four, Rosemary's Baby's two, Alien is three.

SPEAKER_04 22:33

I think this is a good top four for just like horror that most people would be aware of.

SPEAKER_03 22:39

Yeah, that's what I but also very competitive. Yes. These are all amazing for different reasons. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 22:47

You guys are like uh congratulating me, like I drew like a really nice picture in like elementary school. You're like, you did so good. Well you didn't do any of this. No, ChatGPT did it, but I but I gave it all the movies. So you cheated. I did a little bit. Well, it's for the graphics. I said for the horror section it should be blah blah blah blah blah.

SPEAKER_04 23:07

Um, alright, so our first uh our first matchup is The Thing and the Shining. Yes. I mean, one you get like your Cronenberg, you know, body horror kind of uh paranoia and all that, and the other you get your Kubrick just dread and uh surrealism.

SPEAKER_06 23:26

Yeah, okay, so you're dragged around um both claustrophobic films. Yeah. Architecture that can exist, things that can exist. I'm gonna have to go with uh for me a little hometown. My favorite movie is The Shining. I'm gonna have to go with The Shining.

SPEAKER_03 23:42

So is it just I mean it's hard to pick a favorite here.

SPEAKER_06 23:47

Um you don't have to. You can I think it's a tie, and then and then you have more power for the next round.

SPEAKER_03 23:55

So are we just doing thing and shining right now? I think I fucking love the thing. The thing is just I mean, the practical effect I think is so iconic. I mean, whether it's the dog or the you know the head with the crab leg the spider legs.

SPEAKER_06 24:14

There's no wrong answers here. Like, honestly, and that's the thing. There's upsets all the time. Like there I wouldn't call these Cinderellas, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 24:21

I I don't like sports, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 24:23

Okay. Like a Cinderella would be like Cinderella's a folk tale about a girl and a prince.

SPEAKER_06 24:30

I don't like folk tales and a slipper. You're gonna hate college basketball, because that's all the only metaphors. No, but I'm saying like the the the Cinderella metaphor would be like if like you got a power, you got Duke, right? And Duke is a big thing.

SPEAKER_04 24:43

Yeah, you know, you know this college this this sports metaphor that I'm describing so that you because you don't understand sports. Let me use some more sports to explain it.

SPEAKER_03 24:51

Getting angrier as the explanation is conceded. Sorry, I didn't mean it like that.

SPEAKER_06 24:55

I'm just saying, like, when the most powerful thing falls to the weakest thing, but it's it's a close game. It's it's a game of odds, you know.

SPEAKER_03 25:05

I look I'm gonna go with the thing just because I feel like you know, visually, and film is a visual medium.

SPEAKER_04 25:14

Oh, okay, we've never talked about that before.

SPEAKER_03 25:16

There's a difference between film and podcast.

SPEAKER_04 25:18

Yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_03 25:19

I just feel like there are so many. I mean to me, the the nightmare of the thing and all the horrible, horrible creatures within it are they just haunt me to this day. So you hate dogs? I fucking hate dogs.

SPEAKER_06 25:36

I guess a dog brings the thing in.

SPEAKER_04 25:38

Yes, um, I I think I'm gonna go with uh Nas on this one. Is the thing I've probably watched more than The Shining. Um I think they're both fantastic, um, but an otherworldly threat sometimes, as you might see, is more fun to me than uh a threat coming from within. I also um will get into a fight with anybody. Jack Nicholson is an overrated actor. Wow. Okay, he is such a fucking ham in that movie. Um, and uh I think that you can make a movie without just torturing fucking people. So uh Stanley Kubrick, suck my fucking left nut.

SPEAKER_06 26:17

You're out. Wow, disagree big time with you both. I'll let it fly simply because you know what I didn't realize is the thing does that uh that vampire aspect too, where they're like, oh, it's okay, I'm fine. I don't feel anything. Oh yeah, you know, but they do feel something, and it is the thing.

SPEAKER_04 26:37

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 26:38

Also, John Carpenter, let's go. Um, you're fine. The thing moves on. The shining is dead. Hell yeah. Jack Nicholson is done.

SPEAKER_03 26:45

Oh, we're just deciding there. Okay, cool.

SPEAKER_06 26:47

Yeah, yeah, because you guys won the vote. Alright, shall we move on to the next? It's Rosemary's Nina or Bebe with an accent on the second E versus Extra Telestial. The dark version. Yes, the dark version of Alien. Um Alien. I'm kidding. It's Alien versus Rosemary's baby. What are you picking?

SPEAKER_04 27:12

I okay, so I mean, Alien is one of my favorite movies of all time.

SPEAKER_03 27:16

Same, same. It's so much my favorite. Um, because like, so I had unfettered access to uh the John Fetterman biography called Unfettered. Unfettered access. Fuck him. Uh uh Unfettered access to HBO. And so I definitely saw Alien too early, recurring nightmares of the xenomorph. Yeah. But it's so good, and it kind of really set a baseline for all the horror stuff I liked after that. That's that's a great standard, I feel like it doesn't get better than that. And again, both excellent. I love both those movies, but for me, Culturally Alien is such a gigantic icon. Uh, not all of it as good as you know certain other ones, but it's to me, it just really set my whole foundation for horror movies.

SPEAKER_04 28:13

Um, I like I like this matchup because I think they're both like feminist films, too. Um, Rosemary's Baby is like very clearly, you know, this like whole fucking metaphor for like the experience of like what it means to like learn how to be a fucking woman and mother and all these things, and like how you feel like your identity is being like stripped away by some sort of like otherworldly essence.

SPEAKER_06 28:35

Yeah, and like don't trust your old neighbors.

SPEAKER_04 28:37

I feel like that's like um and then Alien is you know, you're set up that you're um what's his face, the captain, um the actor. Why am I asking you, Jude? Um that's a great point. Um but you're set up that in like you have all these great fucking actors of that time, and and all of them are set up to kind of be the lead, and then Sigourney Weaver steps up and she's like takes control of the ship, and um, like such a fucking killer performance from her.

SPEAKER_06 29:08

Um I tell you my favorite story about Ellian.

SPEAKER_04 29:10

Yeah. Ellian Gonzalez.

SPEAKER_06 29:13

Ellian Gonzalez. My favorite story is when they got him out of that damn closet. Alright, can I tell you It's funny I was just talking about this yesterday.

SPEAKER_04 29:22

He's an icon. Is he bad? He's of the moment. He's like, I was watching the Steven.

SPEAKER_06 29:26

Because of ice ice got him. No, I'm not even kidding. That was ice. Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. No, sorry, go ahead. Oh, oh, this has kind of changed the subject. But do you remember we worked at Attaboy together? Yeah. Do you remember Macau Lee? Like the drink? Yeah. Uh yeah, yeah, yeah. Some like a table was like, What what is like what is Makoli like look like?

SPEAKER_03 29:48

And I was like, Oh, I think we know where this is going.

SPEAKER_06 29:51

Yeah, I was like, I just I took a moment and I was like, I'm gonna go for it. I was like, have you seen the movie Alien? And like everyone at the table's like, yeah, and one guy's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, do you know when like Ian Holm they like cut his head off and then he like comes back to life and like starts speaking, and like all that shit comes out of his mouth? Yeah. I was like, and like everyone at the table was like, no. And like one guy was like, Yeah. And I was like, it looks like that. It's like milk. And then you kissed.

SPEAKER_04 30:18

And well, I was like, I could have just said milk. And and we weren't even really serving Mokoli either. It was mostly a talkju, which is I mean, I don't even want to get into that. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06 30:28

Um, you were saying auditioning for Fraser 3. Uh Fraser Unleashed. Fraser Unleashed Fraser Park.

SPEAKER_07 30:35

Fraser Park. It's a dinosaur! Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:39

Well, I didn't want to say anything in front of um you were saying you were watching Steven versus Steven?

SPEAKER_03 30:44

No, I was just watching yeah, Steven versus Steven, and they were doing on the old daily show. I don't know if you remember, but they were doing a an even Steven, you know, arguing, you know, for sending Elian Gonzalez home or keeping him. I mean, what the fuck are we doing?

SPEAKER_04 31:02

I mean, I I've said this on something.

SPEAKER_03 31:05

We just continue to not know what the fuck we're doing.

SPEAKER_06 31:08

It's that was it was contentious though. Oh, I was in Florida, I forgot. I had one distinct point of view. Oh, okay. You were like, where can I find that raft? Um, no, there were laws back then. That's probably not around, but it was like if you were a Cuban and you got one foot of the American soil, you were a citizen. That was the law. That was like it was like it was like a game.

SPEAKER_04 31:31

It was. Um, finally, on this bracket, I just want to say Rosemary's baby black and white?

SPEAKER_03 31:40

Boring.

SPEAKER_04 31:40

Boring. Get it out of here. Fuck you, Rosemary's baby.

SPEAKER_06 31:47

Well, all I can say is its eyes. What's wrong with its eyes? That's the end. And they're all saying, emotep. Emotep.

SPEAKER_04 31:59

Have either of you watched the like uh prequel to Rosemary's Baby?

SPEAKER_06 32:03

I thought you were gonna say, like, have you seen the Mummy recently? And I was gonna be like, yeah, I have.

SPEAKER_04 32:07

Yeah. More recently than that new one coming out.

SPEAKER_03 32:10

Mummy Reboot?

SPEAKER_04 32:12

Um, well, there's Mummy Reboot coming out, but there's also the one that's like um produced by the Universal Mummy, is it is it that one?

SPEAKER_03 32:20

No, that one happened already, right? They're doing another one.

SPEAKER_04 32:23

They're doing another one, and it's like by some like prestige horror guy. Um, and it's like this couple's kid got like kidnapped, like trafficked, and then they found the kid in like an ancient burial ground inside of a thousand-year-old tomb, and now they have this daughter who's like all decrepit and decayed. Cursed.

SPEAKER_06 32:44

That sounds like Ellen Gonzalez a little bit. Um, yeah. Alright, we can't let the defective people listen to this podcast. They're gonna get so mad. Alright, so now we're on to uh Roman. Should we move on to like the next? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'll just do that. Also, the April Fool spells his name A-P-R-Y-L-E-F-O-O-L-E. April Foolie.

unknown 33:08

Fuck that.

SPEAKER_06 33:09

So now we're in romance. So you have four movies here. You got Shrek, Shrek 2, Jerry Maguire, and when Harry Met Sally.

SPEAKER_04 33:17

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 33:18

I love Shrek V Shrek 2. Shrek 1 versus Shrek 2 in terms of love. Where do you guys stand? Let's start Nuss. This is a hard one. This is a humd.

SPEAKER_03 33:28

I believe I saw Shrek 1. What happens in Shrek 2? Oh my god. I'm not I don't my vote really shouldn't count on this one, honestly.

SPEAKER_06 33:37

They go back to the the the uh what is it, Happily Ever After, which is where Fiona's from. They meet her parents. John Cleese and somebody else. Yes, and then she was supposed to marry Prince Charming, who, in like a very similar plot line to Kindergarten Cop, is like influenced by his fairy godmother that he needs to marry Fiona the whole time. So they need to break them up so that he can marry Fiona and break the curse, because if he doesn't break the curse, he doesn't have agency. I see.

SPEAKER_04 34:06

Introduces uh Antonio Benderas as Positive.

SPEAKER_03 34:09

Oh, then yes, I he wasn't in the first one. No. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 34:13

Um, this is I mean, Shrek 2 is one of the like founding reasons that I started this podcast.

SPEAKER_06 34:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 34:21

When I talk about sequels that are better than the original, and I, you know, I think that Shrek 1 was formative and foundational, but Shrek 2, I think, is a much better film in the world.

SPEAKER_06 34:31

That's also another pillar of Islam. They added another one.

SPEAKER_03 34:35

So well, you know, yeah, in that case, I would say, you know. Watch Shrek 2. I'm gonna watch Shrek 2 now.

SPEAKER_06 34:45

Watch Shrek 2 to see what that Shrek does.

SPEAKER_03 34:48

Wow. Off the top of the dome.

SPEAKER_06 34:50

That's almost like the April Fool was.

SPEAKER_03 34:52

You sold me on Shrek 2. Just because yeah.

SPEAKER_04 34:55

And I remember I like Antonio Benderas, so it's got, I think, maybe like three times the amount of musical numbers than the first one.

SPEAKER_06 35:03

Yeah, it starts off with Electric Avenue.

SPEAKER_04 35:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 35:06

Okay, you guys are both wrong because Shrek has love in it. Shrek 2, like, doesn't. There's like no love. Like, who's in love in Shrek 2? Other than Shrek and Fiona, who already fell in love in the original. Why why are we doing this? Donkey plus Dragon. Dragon have baby.

SPEAKER_04 35:22

They have baby. They fucked? Oh yeah, they fuck and they have hybrid mutant babies. Yeah, they keep talking about it. Yeah. And then it's also about self-love because um, you know, Shrek realizes that, like, oh, he's good enough as he is.

SPEAKER_06 35:36

Alright, if you guys want Shrek 2 to advance, I'll begrudgingly let it happen.

SPEAKER_04 35:40

Why are you the arbiter of what goes on? Why is it not the vote? Alright. Oh, and it's all scripted, I forgot.

SPEAKER_06 35:46

Yeah. Now, on to the second round. This is romance. This takes place in the city of love, which is I don't know, Louisville, Kentucky. Because that is where people have sex. It's Jerry Maguire versus when Harry met Sally. What do you think? Um, I mean. Okay, do you want to know the betting lines? I'll look it up on DraftCamp. Yeah. Alright, when Harry met Sally is like minus 400, and Jerry Maguire is plus 250.

SPEAKER_04 36:26

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 36:27

So like it's priced in. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 36:30

I've only seen Jerry Maguire once, and I definitely think it was at a time in my life where like I did not want to watch a movie like Jerry Maguire. Um, didn't like Tom Cruise, didn't like Renee Zellweger. And also like Cuba Gooden Jr. just got arrested. Yeah. Yeah. Um Did you know the average human head weighs eight pounds? You know, fucking what's it? Ricky Stanicki or whatever that kid's name is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you complete you comp you complete me. Yes. All that stuff. You had wasn't it? Like you had me at hello, too. You had me at hello, Renee's always. All that shit.

SPEAKER_03 37:06

I yeah, I was never charmed by Tom Cruise's character in that. I thought he was kind of a prick. Yeah. He was.

SPEAKER_04 37:14

But also Billy Crystal in When Harry Met Sally, kind of a prick.

SPEAKER_03 37:18

I also don't like Billy Crystal. That's the other thing that makes this tough for me.

SPEAKER_06 37:22

But also, I feel like we're getting a different crystal in this. I like I feel like this is like the most authentic. This is like uh the kindergarten cop of Billy Crystal's career. Kind of out of nowhere, very vulnerable, not very comedic. Just like straight man. I don't know. I I'll I'll defer to you on this one, Jude. I'm definitely going when Harry Metz Alley. I mean, just the iconic romantic shots of oh, New York City. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 37:46

This city movie. Beautiful New York movie. Beautiful New York.

SPEAKER_04 37:50

It's almost like uh it's it's it's in the thruple.

SPEAKER_06 37:53

Okay, so we've decided. We've got the thing.

SPEAKER_04 37:56

Can I just talk about them walking through Central Park?

SPEAKER_06 38:00

Well, yeah, if you're talking about Jeremy McGuire, you're gonna talk about running. Being a cat's deli in that pastrami sandwich.

SPEAKER_04 38:08

Yeah. This is not what I do. You're being more annoying than me. I'm no, I'm being at your level of annoying with a my own version of it. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_06 38:17

That's fair. That's fair. Okay, so far we have The Thing. Is it Rosemary's Baby?

unknown 38:23

No.

SPEAKER_06 38:25

Okay, yeah, sorry. Fuck black and white. Okay. The Thing, Alien, Shrek 2, when Harry Met Sally.

SPEAKER_04 38:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 38:32

Now we move on to the thriller portion. This takes the most thrilling city in the United States, which is Seattle, because that's where the ring was shot. Number one seed for Thriller, Chinatown. Number two seed, Silence of Lamb. No, that can't work. Alright. Number one seed, Sansa Lambs. Number two, Jaws. Number three, Chinatown. Number four, Misery. Jordan. Yeah. Sansa Lambs facing down against Chinatown. Going down to proverbial Chinatown, where Roman Polanski is waiting with his dick in his hands.

SPEAKER_04 39:09

Yeah, but he doesn't want me. He wants like a 14-year-old girl. Female version of you. Which I've thought about, which I've constructed in my head many times. So this is the other end of it, because like Jack Nicholson, I do think is like come around on him. And you've also got another Polanski on here. Yeah. Oh yeah. Let's kick both the Polanskys out. Um sorry, Jude. It's not Chinatown. Sunset Lambs is also like a near-perfect movie, too.

SPEAKER_06 39:39

Yeah, well, too good. Have you done the thing where you watched it? I will say. Have you done the thing where you watched it with all the Yes. Have you put on Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon and started it where um multiple Migs throws cum on our young Jody Foster? No. It lines up perfectly. The lambs are still screaming. What were you gonna say originally? Have you done the thing where Oh, you turn all the lights on and watch it? And like it starts to be funny. Like if you watch it, they make so much eye contact directly into the camera that it it it gets to be insane. Like you start to laugh a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 40:20

Did like Jody Foster does?

unknown 40:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:23

Cause she's 'cause she's doing this thing a little bit.

SPEAKER_07 40:26

And she's like, and then I walked into the barn. He's like, and then what did you do? And I opened the door. And the lambs. What were they doing?

SPEAKER_05 40:39

They were screaming. The children. The children were screaming.

SPEAKER_06 40:45

What did you do? What did you say? Um I love it. I love multiple MIGs.

SPEAKER_04 40:53

I love it when he's he's my favorite part of the thing.

SPEAKER_06 40:56

Yeah, multiple MIGs, very low. Like he could have his own verse, honestly. Multiple MIGs in the next cell, what did he say to you?

SPEAKER_07 41:03

A bleeding. He said, I can smell your gun.

SPEAKER_06 41:10

I for one cannot. Do you know what you look to me, Lieutenant Starling? With your cheap bag and your expensive shoes, you look like a rube.

SPEAKER_05 41:22

Dreaming all those days in the back seat of your boyfriend's car that you'd make it all the way to the F eye.

SPEAKER_04 41:32

What a little cunt. Not Jody Foster. Uh yeah, Anthony Hawk. He's goofy. He's goofy. He's he's be he's a he's being cunty in that movie.

SPEAKER_03 41:42

Yeah, real little prick in that in that movie.

SPEAKER_06 41:47

Yeah. I like it when he like cuts the guy's face off and puts it on and he like does like the dance and like the camera happens.

SPEAKER_04 41:54

When I first watched that movie, and that part happens, that was like Shyamalan-esque twist for me. Yeah, because I like had no idea it was coming. It was so cool.

SPEAKER_06 42:09

I think I've seen that movie too many times, and it's a little goofy. I have to say, it's a little goofy.

SPEAKER_04 42:18

You know, horror in a sense should be a little goofy.

SPEAKER_06 42:21

I'm gonna pick Chinatown here to be contrarian.

SPEAKER_03 42:25

Just to be contrarian? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 42:29

Nas, what do you what are you saying? Um be the tiebreaker. Go with your heart, not your dick.

SPEAKER_03 42:36

I'm gonna go silence of the lambs. I I really We're all against you. I was gonna say let's go. And I said let's stop.

SPEAKER_06 42:43

I I really Nas, you don't have to do it because Jordan is like psychically urging you to do it, which I feel like he is.

SPEAKER_03 42:49

We just have different tastes, okay. No, I just like I mean I just love the kind of cop thriller. Um and I mean his performance is so like he said it's so cunty, it's so specific, it's so recognizable. I don't know. I I that's just my gut.

SPEAKER_06 43:12

Chinatown, it's about water, but it could be about the Epstein list. You know what I mean? Yeah, sounds like it's pretty timely.

SPEAKER_03 43:20

For sure. Um is it timely?

SPEAKER_06 43:22

Yes, but you just said you were in LA, you love LA, Nice. I know nothing about you, but you just said you were in LA. And now you're gonna turn on the city of the the the gilded city of angels. Of angels? City of angels.

SPEAKER_04 43:34

Sometimes I think just in this time, it's like we're choosing hope over like nihilism. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 43:40

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 43:41

Oh, I see. Okay, because it's hopeful.

SPEAKER_03 43:43

I'm Chinatown, nothing's ever gonna get better.

SPEAKER_06 43:45

The end of the Sons of Lamp ends with a pun. That's what I don't like. He's like, I'm meeting an old friend Sadina. That's not a pun.

SPEAKER_03 43:55

Oh boy, don't get him started on this.

SPEAKER_06 43:57

Oh my god. What is it? They're about play on.

SPEAKER_04 44:00

Words. That's exactly what it is. I thought a pun definition is a play on the honestly just a clever turn of phrase. Because it's not a play on words. He's just meeting a friend for dinner.

SPEAKER_06 44:10

He's eating his the guy. That's what he's saying. Yeah. But he's saying, I'm meeting an old friend for dinner. So it's like, if I was gonna meet you and jack you off, I'd be like, I'm rubbing one out or something. You know what I mean? Right, but that's that's not a pun?

SPEAKER_04 44:28

No. A pun is literally like replacing a word with another word that to change the meaning of the thing, but the words are essentially the same. Okay. So like if you were seeing some monkeys like horsing around and you were like, that's some monkey business, that is not a pun. Because monkey just means monkey. Um, even so far as like derivative things won't be like I'm actually confused.

SPEAKER_06 44:55

Wait, okay.

SPEAKER_04 44:56

So if I said That's I'm not surprised. Well, I'm I'm being the I'm being the try-hard ass hole.

SPEAKER_06 45:02

Totally activated. Alright, so if I said like Is it in the same vein as like let's eat grandma, right? That's a classic syntax error. Let's eat comma grandma. If you don't put the comma in it, it sounds like let's eat grandma. Let's all eat grandma, right? So let's eat comma grandma, let's eat grandma, dinner's ready.

SPEAKER_04 45:23

A hundred cent.

SPEAKER_06 45:24

Is that a pun?

SPEAKER_04 45:25

No. A pun is something like um my grandfather's definition of pun.

SPEAKER_06 45:30

If you went to the uh Oxford English Dictionary right now, like you're graduating from high school, okay. Oxford English Dictionary defines pun as togetherness. It would say like a play on words. No. Would it not? No. I mean, it is a play on words, but if we're going to Miriam Webster.

SPEAKER_04 45:49

I think we're getting his ass. No. I brought it up. I was I had one of the most successful pun podcasts in the world. I went down to pun competitions in Austin, Texas. You went to a pun competition? I've been to many, many pun competitions.

SPEAKER_03 46:05

You don't know about this freak?

SPEAKER_06 46:06

Um I know he loves puns. He got me with one the other day. He's got a problem with puns.

SPEAKER_04 46:11

The it's called Vizosucht. Uh, it is the compulsion to pun. Um a pun is the usually humorous use of a word in such a way as to suggest two or more of its meanings or the meaning of another word similar in sound.

SPEAKER_06 46:25

That's literally what he does.

SPEAKER_04 46:27

I'm meeting an old friend for dinner. You're not replacing, you're not using another word to change this thing. It the the the clever turn of phrase is that they are going to be having dinner together, but he is going to be eating him, but it doesn't change the meaning of the sentence to say he's meeting him for dinner. No, it's like the thing In either regard, he's meeting him for dinner.

SPEAKER_06 46:49

Jordan, it's like the it's the Batman thing. It's this it's the Batman thing.

SPEAKER_03 46:53

It's like This is the last episode of this.

SPEAKER_06 46:55

It's like this is going this is going to hurt for you. Like, it's like I'm meeting an old freaking up the Yes.

SPEAKER_04 47:03

You keep bringing all of these for dinner. This is a play on words. It is a play on words. That is not a pun. A play on words does not a pun me.

SPEAKER_06 47:11

Repeat the pun definition.

SPEAKER_04 47:12

It can it's like saying a rectangle is a square, a square doesn't or a square is a rectangle, a rectangle doesn't have to be a square. A pun is a play on words, a play on words does not a pun make. I think we're in wrong. A pun is a very specific play on words where you are literally like mo using a word to suggest a double meaning. So, like if my fa my grandfather used to say, eat every carrot and pee on your plate. Yes. That is a pun.

SPEAKER_06 47:37

Okay, because eat every carrot and then pee on your plate and then piss on your plate.

SPEAKER_04 47:42

Because it could mean pee or piss on your plate.

SPEAKER_06 47:44

What does dinner mean in this context?

SPEAKER_04 47:46

It means dinner.

SPEAKER_02 47:47

That's it.

SPEAKER_04 47:49

Whether or not he the guy is also eating does not change that it means dinner. But it's humorous.

SPEAKER_06 47:58

This is what I don't understand. It said, it said on the thing. It's like for humorous effect, a word having two or more meanings. But it only has one meaning has two meanings.

SPEAKER_04 48:06

It only has one meaning. Dinner.

SPEAKER_06 48:07

No.

SPEAKER_04 48:09

Whether or not the guy is participating in eating doesn't change the fact that it is dinner. Jordan, dinner for sustenance.

SPEAKER_06 48:17

As opposed to dinner. He's saying for food. I'm meeting an replace dinner with food. I'm meeting an old friend for food. It means the same thing. No, the friend is food.

SPEAKER_04 48:30

That's the that's why it's a play on words, right? It is, yes, it is a play on words. So it's a pun. No. Oh my god. Because dinner means dinner. It's like it's exactly what I said. It's like monkeying around. It just because the idea is broader in its scope or like could reference something else, it it is the same word. You're using the word to describe the word. So dinner is not changing in any regard. Our perception of what dinner means. It is changing the perception. Because the perception the perception doesn't matter. That's what I'm saying. Is the perception of our word does change, but the actual meaning of the word does not change.

SPEAKER_06 49:14

No. It changes because he's eating a human link. But he can't. Jordan, that is important. Honestly, I think you're gonna get owned. By who? By the the grammar police. Oh yeah, I forgot. Tyler from Grammar police. Yeah, Tyler from Grammarly is about to step in.

SPEAKER_04 49:33

Okay, so once again. And get you.

SPEAKER_06 49:35

Look at him, he's sweating, his hands are shaking.

SPEAKER_04 49:38

I am at the Jude point because I'm like tearing off my clothes and Chinatown wins because of all this.

SPEAKER_06 49:44

Well, because we can't continue now, because it makes Jordan too upset. Alright, so now we so now we have to move on to our two and three. This is a hostile takeover. This is. This is not what this is a leveraged buyout LBO. I'm going Nabisco on your pussy. And we're moving into Misery and Jaws. Misery wins because Jaws is terrible.

SPEAKER_04 50:08

I'll agree, not that Jaws is terrible, but that Misery is a better movie than Jaws.

SPEAKER_03 50:12

Yeah, I this Wow.

SPEAKER_04 50:14

I wasn't expecting that.

SPEAKER_03 50:14

And I think with Jaws. But um Yeah, I mean, insane performance from Kathy Bates.

SPEAKER_04 50:27

I mean, Oscar winning? Yeah, Oscar winning.

SPEAKER_03 50:30

Yeah. Yeah, she won Oscar. Like, yeah, Jaws is a good movie, but I don't know, man. Kathy Bates really just makes misery a whole other level of thing.

SPEAKER_04 50:39

I mean, you're getting great performances in Jaws, but the fucking like powerhouse, it's like a begonia of like, you know, James Conn and Kathy Bates is crazy.

SPEAKER_08 50:49

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 50:50

I have nothing else to say. Uh, misery is one of my favorites. Uh it pwns Jaws. Sharks go to the toilet.

SPEAKER_04 51:00

Dude, imagine like on our on our old episode where that guy, Steven or whatever, fought the shark. Imagine Kathy Bates in the water with that sledgehammer.

SPEAKER_06 51:10

Just two fins together. Like she puts the wood in between the fins where they like kind of jut out, and she takes the hammer and puts it there, and the shark's like, oh, I'll change it! Okay. Now we're in the comedy territory. The comedy territory has to take place in the funniest city in the United States, which has to be Tampa. Uh, number one seed, best in show. Number two seed, young Frankenstein, three seed, how high, four seed, caddyshack.

SPEAKER_04 51:41

This is my favorite bracket of the night. Um, we have Caddyshack Young Frankenstein in in the first matchup. Um hey, that's a nice hat. Does it come with a bowl of soup? Is that a pun, you bitch? No. Um this I'm glad that I'm in another relationship where people are just gonna start asking me, is that a pun? Just facetiously too.

SPEAKER_03 52:06

I think I've casually heard you and your brother talking about that so many times that's a good thing.

SPEAKER_06 52:12

Wait, explain it for the podcast. Because I know you said this thing about like Joe Firestone does like the pun all okay. I thought you meant another time explain what a pun is. So I was like, I feel like Explain for the listeners why you're so annoying about this.

SPEAKER_04 52:25

I uh I used to compete competitively in puns with my brother, um Jersey Guzdowski, um, who um is like he's like very um well known in the pun circle. Um you can look this up online the Gwiazdowski, Jersey Gwizdowski, Jordan Gwizdowski, my brother Tobias. Um, Toby started doing it more recently and has been more active than either of us. And uh you can look up the Austin O. Henry Punoff. That's that's like a stooges situation. Like the brothers are all successful at it. Uh, we started doing it together at Punderdome in Brooklyn, hosted by then Joe Firestone and her father Fred Firestone. Fred only hosts it now. Joe has become, you know, successful and famous um and left her dad in the dust. Um, they're like some of the sweetest people ever. Um, but it's you know, the pun scene I think is like very fun, queer, inclusive, nerdy, which I loved. Um I just never felt like the actual competitive scene was to my standards. Um, but my brother and I ran a podcast called uh Punkast, a pun cast. That is a pun. Um, and we would do little pun games and things like that. And one of our very specific moments in that was uh whenever we would do a play on words that was not a pun, we would knock each other with not a pun. Still good.

SPEAKER_06 53:54

Why did you never tell me this? I never knew this about you in Jersey.

SPEAKER_04 53:58

Um, it's it's a part of my life that I'm like ashamed to talk about. I left it behind. I have not done pun competition in quite a while.

SPEAKER_06 54:07

So we gotta bring you back. You you you did make this pun that I actually do keep thinking about. You um we talked about how the Buffalo Wild Wings uh Buffalo like was explains that he's he's bisexual in the ads for like someone from Middle America, and then you said that he said, and I'm bi, son. Yeah. That made me laugh this morning. Actually, I had a terrible migraine this morning. I woke up at three in the morning and I was walking around with a bag of peas on my fucking head like an asshole, and I was trying to think of anything to make me laugh because it's the only thing that would make me not think of the migraine, and I thought about Jordan's pun.

SPEAKER_03 54:49

And so that reminded you of I'm meeting a friend for dinner. No, no, no, that's no they're the same thing.

SPEAKER_04 54:57

No, I'm I'm gonna die on that hill. Um second uh oh Caddyshack versus Young Frankenstein. I mean, Mel Mel Mel Mel Brooks' goat for me on this one.

SPEAKER_03 55:08

Yeah, it's honestly it's not even fair for me to like it's I've probably seen Caddyshack more times just absorbed through the television.

SPEAKER_04 55:16

I've seen Caddyshack two more times uh absorbed to television.

SPEAKER_00 55:20

But uh Rollin's a hey, rollin' roll in the hay.

SPEAKER_06 55:25

Alright, uh I go out, you grab the bags. Alright, I'll take this one, you take the other one. No, I'll take the blonde, you take the frenette. That shit gets me every time.

SPEAKER_04 55:34

Walk this way, dude.

SPEAKER_06 55:36

Friggin' banana! Caddyshack also did get Happy Gilmore. I feel like I feel like Happy Gilmore is legitimately funnier than Caddyshack. And in like, respectfully, I still think Caddyshack is funny. But I think like Happy Gilmore is just like funnier, I guess.

SPEAKER_03 55:52

Yeah, I had a distance. There was like too much distance with like the whole golfing thing for me for Caddyshack. So I never really connected with it in the same way that young Frankenstein. I was like already kind of into horror, and I really liked Looney Tunes and all the other Mel Brooks things, so I was like, oh, this is like a vibe for me. So I was just so always so partial to that.

SPEAKER_06 56:12

Is is Caddyshack in the the Ivan Reitberg verse? It might be because it's uh what's it called?

SPEAKER_04 56:18

Animal house. Yeah, that kind of lampoon stuff.

SPEAKER_06 56:21

There's a part where like they're talking to um uh Chevy Chase, and they're like He's like when I was in Vietnam, this happened. They're like, oh, you're in Vietnam fighting the war? He's like, no. That was a homo. And like that was the joke.

SPEAKER_03 56:38

Classic fucking.

SPEAKER_06 56:39

But that's like the kind of like caddyshack humor, I guess. Yeah. Um and also like Bill Murray is like not funny in that movie either. No, like Mushmouth from Bill Murray fighting the gopher.

SPEAKER_03 56:53

That was pretty low-tier Bill Murray.

SPEAKER_06 56:55

Yeah, okay, this movie sucks.

SPEAKER_04 56:56

This is gonna be this is gonna be one of the hardest matchups, I think, in the How High Bestin show. How high V Bastin show.

SPEAKER_03 57:03

Oh my god. Vastly different, but they do equally powerful.

SPEAKER_06 57:09

The Field of Dreams parody with Method Man and Red Man in How High is unbelievable. When they smoke with like Ben Franklin and the conceit was that if you smoked uh the body of a dead person, they would appear. And Ben Franklin was like, Oh, you smoked that good kush, and then he like does this dance at the end. Ugh so good.

SPEAKER_03 57:30

The bad guy fire fighting a gorilla. Like, who can you can make an argument for either one?

SPEAKER_04 57:34

Yeah. I I do think with Best in Show, it's like it might not be my favorite guest movie, but I think some of the most top-tier of all the characters are in them.

SPEAKER_06 57:46

I I completely agree. It like and also the fucking like the line like everyone was firing at the top of what they could fire, I guess. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 57:57

But when um this was also pre-sexy Eugene Levy. Eugene Levy's gotten like a late stage glow-up, and I I like ugly Levy.

SPEAKER_06 58:08

He's so ugly.

SPEAKER_03 58:09

Wait, so how different is he? Are you eyebrows are the same?

SPEAKER_06 58:13

Oh, he was like he was also like uglier than American Pie, I think.

SPEAKER_04 58:16

Yeah, way uglier than the buck teeth to he's like, oh, I had I had two left feet.

SPEAKER_06 58:21

No, seriously, I had two left feet. If I walked in a straight line for long enough, I'd come back again in the circle. And his wife's a toe. They called me Lucy. Also, like it was so ahead of the game with like yuppies with um Oh yeah, Parker Posey.

SPEAKER_07 58:39

Did you get his busy pay?

SPEAKER_04 58:41

The the story where they meet where she's like, I was sitting at Starbucks looking at my LLB catalog, and I noticed he was at the Starbucks across the street.

SPEAKER_05 58:51

Which was a straight up bit from like fucking Louis Black, where he's like, the end of the universe is a Starbucks. Across from a Starbucks.

SPEAKER_06 59:03

That was it.

SPEAKER_04 59:05

Um also Michael McKean and uh what's his face were like one of my first exposures to like uh yeah, like an open gay couple.

SPEAKER_06 59:13

And they just kept like being like, You got mean in here?

SPEAKER_03 59:15

That was like the old yeah, one one's a one's a richer text, but the other's also a very funny text.

SPEAKER_04 59:23

Yeah. Should we go at the upset on this one with a high how high?

SPEAKER_06 59:27

That would be epic. Yeah. That would be, yeah. Uh oh, I said epic again without like mentioning it. I was like, can I use this word? It would be epic. It would be legend that dot dot wait for it.

SPEAKER_04 59:39

Very epic. Anna? Anna! Get on the cast!

unknown 59:44

What do you want from me?

SPEAKER_04 59:46

Uh we just decided that how high was better than um Best and Show. Best in show.

SPEAKER_01 59:52

I've never seen How High.

SPEAKER_04 59:55

We gotta watch it.

SPEAKER_01 59:56

But um not to go back three hours, but I did have a friend with a ferret in high school.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:04

And what where is he now?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:05

His name is Buffalo. I have no idea. Well, his last name was Befar. Shout out to Buffalo.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:10

The friend or the ferret's name?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:12

The friend's name.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:13

She loves to shout out people on this podcast. She's a real what's her address?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:18

Um I can find that favorite. I haven't talked to him in like 20 years, but does his dad give guitar lessons? Probably. Um, yeah, he had a like a I don't know, I'm in traffic.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:29

No, it's good. He had a This is a goofy cast.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:32

Like a shed, and they turned it into like the ferret's house, essentially, and it had like a huge cage like lining the whole like one wall, and it stunk so bad. And we would go in there and we would like to go. Because of the glance.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:45

Get closer, get closer.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:47

We would go into Buffo's shed.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:51

Just hotbox. Tell us what happened in Buffo's shed. Just hotbox yourself on the free. Tell us what happened in Buffo shed, Clarence.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:58

I can still hear the ferret.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:02

They're screaming.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:04

They're screaming. Um, my friend Buffo had a sh a ferret shed, and we would go in there and we would play DDR. And play with big was the shed. Huh?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:14

You had the DDR pads laid out and the ferrets were in there?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:18

Yes, I think so. From what I remember. This is the very last one. Extremely stinky, and we smoked weed, so all of those scents combined. The weed might actually cut through everything else. I think that's what made it bearable.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:31

Because we were like high and they oftentimes are referred to weed as skunk.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:36

We referred to it as ferret.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:38

The cousins in Connecticut it's called ferret.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:40

In Connecticut, it's called Buffalo's Ferret.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:42

So that was actually a uh, just so you know, context-wise, that's a throwback to last week, actually. So you're going back a week. I love in the past. Alright, I think we're gonna have to lightning round on uh the next match.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:56

I think we should Because we've already talked about him. Well, we said we're gonna do two hours. Yeah, we did say Nas said he wasn't hungry.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:02

Yeah. Uh Anna, feel free to chime in on any of these. Horror, we've got the thing going up against alien.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:09

Two aliens two aliens all fucking both designed by the same guy, right? Is this both? Oh no, one jumper. Giger. Yeah. Giga. Giga. I think it's Giga.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:21

I am H I Giga. That's only from Colour. Everything to me. Everything to me is a pussy or a dick.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:28

I love you, Lady Giger. You're so ugly, Lady Gig. You're so fucking ugly, but I fucking love you.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:39

I I if if we're just going on design here, like I love the fucking like horrific uh absurdity of a carpenter monster in the thing, but the I mean Giger's design is just like The Xenomorph still scares me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:56

It is the pinnacle of a fucking nightmare.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:59

Really? I don't like him. Sorry. What for what? I don't know why. I just don't I think they look like weird uh chill like children's spiders. And I've don't have any reason. I've not thought this out. I'm not being contrarian. I just never was that scared of them. The face huggers? Weird. Yeah. Like if my it's also a nightmare.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:21

I mean, like I'm lumping them all in. And it lays eggs inside of you. The life cycle is a nightmare.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:26

The thing might be too fantastical for me to believe, but if I saw the thing shit. I'd hate it.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:36

It's imagine a little spider head crawling from around the corner there.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:40

Yeah, because it's like, oh, you think you killed it, and then like it's like when you think you kill a bug, but like part of the bug keeps like splinters off into a new bug.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:46

Yeah, and you're like, oh, I made more bugs.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:51

Um there's a fun little kind of like lore connection between the two because both are like the impetus of their uh invasion upon the movie is like because they essentially killed a larger or like life form that was keeping them captive. Um in it's the whatever the what are they called in alien? They're like big humanoids. That are progenitors, yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever they are. Yeah. So like you see the corpse of that one, and then all the eggs are like around there, and like they created this bioweapon or whatever that is the xenomorph. And then in the thing, um was it in ice?

SPEAKER_03 1:04:33

Didn't they find it in ice?

SPEAKER_04 1:04:34

They find it in ice, but what there's like a very quick opening, like cold open thing where it shows like a spaceship above the earth that like crashes. Um, and then there's a deleted scene where they actually like you see the alien species that was in that ship, and people were like, Oh, that's the thing, but no, that was some sort of like like zookeeper species that was transporting the thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:01

I think it's like there was one studio that just got like a really good image of like the earth and like something firing into it, and they did like Predator 2, you know? Yeah. In the 80s. They were just like, they were a hot commodity back then.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:13

I'm ride or die alien.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:15

I'll go alien too. Okay, I'll take the thing to be contrarian, but alien to no avail.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:23

Then we've got Shrek 2 V Harry met Sally.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:27

I think this is pretty easy for me. I was pretty sus about Shrek 2 to start with. Yeah, they're kind of the same movie. When Harry met Shrek, Harry screamed. I'll have what she's heavy. I'll have what she's have. I'll have what haggas pastromi is like onions. Yeah, yo, the the layouts had layer. The the onion thing always was so good. I I remember being a kid and thinking, damn, like onions are aughts are like onions. They have Layers. Like a puff. Hey, was me.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:04

I'm actually not gonna do it. Yeah. What if there was like a pre-slap? Like somebody slapped Eddie Murphy at the Oscars. That'd been cool. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:15

Hold up. Okay. Go back. Eddie Murphy was not involved in the slap.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:21

I know. I'm saying it would have been cool if there was like a proto slap.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:25

Oh, oh, like a like an alien. No, like a never mind. Like a butterfly effect, but slap. Yes. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:36

So Harry Metzally, are we saying is going on?

SPEAKER_03 1:06:40

Yeah, I think so.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:41

I mean, I agree with you guys. So if you guys want to take the opposite because I suck, then do it. But I think the April fool.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:46

He's totally demoralized.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:48

The April fool put$200 on. He lost his mojo. Alright, now we're in Thriller. We got Silencio de las Cabras versus Misery?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:00

Yeah. Miserio. Anthony Hopkins versus Kathy Bates.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:06

Did you know that Kathy Bates was like roommates with Francis McDormant and like the Coens and stuff? Really?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:12

Yeah, they're all pals.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:14

Yeah. But I didn't know that. But they never put Kathy Bates in a movie.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:18

Really? Was she not in like uh are we going Toss of the Lambs?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:22

I'm still gonna go Misery. Just because it's so I can't quote Misery like I can Silence of Lambs. That's true.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:28

You may not be able to quote it, but there are more characters too in Silence of the Lambs. And they could probably beat beat up the cast of Misery. What are you, size six?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:38

I mean Anthony Hopkins would kill everyone in Misery successfully.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:42

Was she a great big fat woman?

SPEAKER_04 1:07:43

Or Buffalo Bill would say Silence of the Lambs.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:47

Alright, I'll go Silence of the Lambs. Um Goodbye Horses. As Silence of the Lambs pushes on to the final four. The April Fool is pleased. Now we move back to the comedy section in Tampa. We've got Young Frankenstein versus How High.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:08

How high. This is gonna feel, you know. Young Frankenstein I think is like one of my favorite comedies of all time. But I also love weed.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:20

I don't smoke weed.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:22

I think it would be anti the ethos to the Stoner movie to try to forcefully elevate it above something like young Frankenstein.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:33

But also, isn't how high like though it is the kind of the like isn't stuffy white people shit, you know, like we do it better. We taking over.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:44

We we we do be taking over. We do be smoking this bitch. Did you guys see that uh Afroman trial?

SPEAKER_04 1:08:51

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean that's a topic for another.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:54

Well, Defector wrote a great article about it just to like be like Defector, come be on our podcast, but they did write a great article about it, and it was awesome. We love you, Afro Man. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:05

Yeah, he did great. He did great in the deposition and good for him, and fuck that cop.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:10

Yeah, that they really did make themselves look stupid.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:13

Um also, when asked about Donald Trump, he said, I don't agree with a lot of what he says, but I do want to get those bathrooms right. So we contain multitudes. He's talking about the golden toilets. Um where are we doing? What are we doing? We move on. Wait, how higher best and show?

SPEAKER_03 1:09:33

I say young Frankenstein, I with maximum respect for both.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:38

Okay. Okay. Uh I will say how high because I am an anti-racist.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:45

Yeah, because I'm an anti-racist, unlike Nas, and I like getting tracked me. Yeah, exactly. And I love getting high. I'm gonna say how high.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:55

I hate getting high. Okay, alright, let's move on. Okay, we're in We're in the semifinals. We're in the semifinals. We're in the final four. So what's that? Yeah, not that's the important thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:09

So imagine Duke and Dude, imagine Michael Jordan.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:16

I know him. Yeah. Okay. Versus Patrick Ewing. I know him. You might be a little bit more familiar with this than you might think your buddy.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:27

Mid-90s Knicks bulls basketball pretty well.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:31

Okay, let's keep going here.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:34

Don't dig any deeper.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:36

Uh Karim Abdul Jabal. You know him. Buddy, I've got a school for you. It's called Kentucky. That's where he played. And they were also in the final four. Larry Bird. Larry Bird, Indiana State. For you.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:50

Pippin versus Bird. I know that. Pippin versus Bird? Magic. That was a video game.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:57

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:57

There's a Pippin versus Bird.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:59

That's a weird combo. That's like. Did I make that up? Did I make it? Well, no, I'm not. I'm not calling you out on sports non-s, but the classic thing in the 80s was like Larry Bird versus Magic Johnson. And then you get into the 90s and you get like Michael Jordan with Scottie Pippen. So like it would be like a straight it would be an older man versus a younger, less talented man, but probably more athletically inclined.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:22

I heard that's the reason the Eagles didn't carry Frodo to Mount Doom.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:26

The Eagles didn't carry Frodo to Mount Doom because Hell Froze Over.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:32

Is that a pun?

SPEAKER_06 1:11:33

No. It kind of is.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:35

It kinda is, but I'm gonna say no just so we don't have to.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:38

What about my pun where it was like Hell Froze Over? Because the Eagles band did the Hell Freezes Over tour.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:43

That's not a pun.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:45

Um I'm playing Please let's just continue.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:48

Yeah, we got it, we got it, we got it finished.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:50

You are so pathetic.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:52

Uh we're in the we're in the red zone or in the paint. We're in the paint. We're in the paint. We've always been in the paint. Okay. Um, so it's Alien V Harry Met Sally. What is that true?

SPEAKER_06 1:12:04

I believe so. Alright. Okay, so Alien v. Harry Met Sally. I mean, they're dead. Wait, we're now we're just going off like your dad could beat up my dad and why based off my dad's physical attributes. Xenomurph versus Billy Crystal. Who do you think amongst our dads could beat the dad? Who do let's do this. Let's settle this.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:27

Whose dad? What was that again? Refresh?

SPEAKER_06 1:12:30

Who which one of our dads could beat up the other dads? Three on three, dads. One dad survives. My dad is 6'2, but had stage four cancer two years ago, but he's in remission. Okay. My dad is about six feet tall. Uh he did HVAC most of his life. Oh, he's probably a specimen, I bet. He's a specimen. He's like You could take a like a like In the way that the thing is a specimen.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:55

My problem is a good thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:56

You could take a like a like a like a what is it? The things that uh windshield wiper? Yeah. To get the sweat off of his back, your man is salt to the earth. This could be a fight. This could be a dad fight.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:09

My dad's not on paper uh threatening he was a carpenter, but he can get incandescently mad.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:17

So your dad's an angry Greek carpenter. Does he practice forgiveness?

SPEAKER_04 1:13:24

Does he flip over tables in the temple? Temple? Yeah, when people are when traitors are there.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:31

Or like they're like doing their when it's the house of the Lord and they're they're trading. Does your dad ever cast the first stone?

SPEAKER_04 1:13:41

Does your dad get when he gets when he gets unnaturally mad, is it sometimes at a fig tree which is not producing fruit?

SPEAKER_06 1:13:50

Is there like a period of your dad's life between the ages of like six and thirty that we're not sure where he was or what he was doing and could have been in Utah?

SPEAKER_02 1:13:59

I'm feeling very uncomfortable with this where this one's going.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:02

Why are you glowing? You are the sequel to Christ. You are the son of the son of God. You're double God. What? Okay, so Alien takes it. Silence of the Lambs v How High.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:16

Okay. So you guys but backed yourself in a corner here.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:20

Two of the greatest movies of all time.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:22

Well, you guys said you like Silence of the Lambs so much. You better follow through. Because I think How High is the better movie.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:29

I would re-watch How High more times than I would want to re-watch Silence of the Lambs. Yeah. So based on that, I will now go with How High.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:39

Yep. How High. I'm I'm there.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:41

I would happily rewatch How High many, many times.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 1:14:45

Okay.

unknown 1:14:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:47

Is there any like uh songs you can remember from How High? Any like classic songs that maybe came out of that movie? Because I don't I can't think of one.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:55

One of my favorites from that is How to Roll a Blunt by Redman. So, you know, there's some memorable tracks. I think we I mean it's two we got two votes for it, Judy. Do you oppose our How High moving on?

SPEAKER_06 1:15:07

Yeah, just out of like No, no, I don't oppose. Good, good.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:10

I thought you were an anti-racist.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:12

No, no, that's why I chose it. Okay. That's why I chose it originally before I even did the The April Fool was like, oh, how high's on the list. I was like, oh, that's going to the finals because of black exit.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:20

Well, it is. It's now in the finals V. Perfect. Alien? Alien. Alien V How High. So I never like to see this, but it is like black on black violence. We've got a xenomorph, jet black. And you know when a xenomorph gets pulled over, it's completely different. Do you know who I am? It says. Yeah. I'm currently on tour. Yeah. Have you seen the video? This is gonna be super.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:48

This is gonna ruin the tour.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:50

And then and then when they do when they do his ethnicity on his forest. And he's like, come on, guys, white. Yeah. Just kidding. Just kidding. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:03

This is a pitch.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:04

That'd be a good idea. This is a pitch. This is a pitch. Justin Timberlake, if you're out there.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:09

Come on the podcast. Come on the podcast. We will get a DUI in your place. I would gladly be his tribute for the.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:16

Would you take a DUI for Justin Timberlake? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:21

Yes. I could get that thing off. 100%. 10 grand. I would ask him. I'd be like, pay me, give me 10 grand, Venomie Fenton, 10 grand for the court case. I have to go to therapy like five times.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:31

You know Will Schuster, the teacher from Glee? Of course. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:35

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:35

Um, and he's going on the Broadway right now. Yeah, Mr. Shu. I feel like him and Justin Timberlike have the same action.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:41

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't even put I I kind of made them into one guy. Yeah. They're kind of the same.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:46

And Ryan Philippe?

SPEAKER_06 1:16:48

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:48

Ryan Philippe is um. He's not a Philippe Sance right now. We we've seen him in a number of lifetime movies.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:55

That's not a Renaissance. Yo, yo, I I actually had a podcast with my brother where we talked about renaissances. And it's really popular. And that's not a renaissance. You dumb cunt. You dumb cunt. This will ruin the show. Dude, Noss, don't get us scared. Okay, how high V alien? How high V alien?

SPEAKER_03 1:17:11

Uh again, I'm just gonna go alien by default here. It's my it's a core foundational thing for me.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:19

I'm going alien. Are you kidding me? Fucking Bilbo Baggins jacking out that Macau Lee out of his hot mouth. That's how that's just the way the cookie crumbles. I'm sorry, Method Man. I'm sorry, red man. R.I.P. to ODB.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:38

ODB, yes! Shimish. Um, I'm gonna go with how high because I am the only remaining anti-racist on this podcast.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:46

I just walk. This was a demented vision of a pr of a shoe.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:52

I mean once again. I knew that's gonna have my way with all my friends. This is exactly what this appreh fool wanted. That's right! The Aprio Fool! I'm here to show you my four nipples. Where are your fucking pants? I didn't pants? I've never heard of them.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:13

But well, my father was a habadasher, but my mother was a boar! And all they did was make sweaty love, and I just asked for more.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:26

And in those eternal words, um we've all been caught in the in the in the tender trap of that April fool. And we leave the March madness behind, and we look forward to, as Justin Timberlike famously said, it's gonna be May.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:50

It's going to be May, and I'm going to be operating heavy machinery under the influence.