Our Classic Shrimp and Beef Wrap

Now available for a limited time on our "Retro Menu" is how it all began, or should we say ended?

Juicy meat in a dough thing. We talk about movies.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

I love a segment episode. I love a segment episode. I love a bottle episode. Yes. Bottle episode is when in a season they're like running low on money or they just want to make an episode that's very contained so they can save money. And so they set it in like one location. Uh a great example of that is the Breaking Bad episode where they're in the meth lab. The fly. The fly, yes. Yeah. That is a bottle episode.

SPEAKER_05 0:25

Yeah, I feel like it happens on series two. I don't not a big euphoria fan, but I did kind of watch this last season. And apparently they like couldn't get all the actors like in the same room. Because they hate each other. Well, Zendaya apparently hates Sidney Sweeney. But then Jacob Ballory all hate Sydney Sweeney. The world hates Sydney Sweeney. Yeah, but I love those boobs. I can't get enough of them.

SPEAKER_06 0:51

I wish I had a soundboard. I love boobs. I love those boobs.

unknown 0:58

Boy.

SPEAKER_05 0:59

Yeah, uh, my grandfather's last words famously. Um but Jacob Alordi was like apparently very busy, and they had to like film all his stuff later. So his whole like thing in the season is that he's buried underground. Yeah, he's buried alive. He's buried alive because like that's the only time. Yeah. And they like David Blaine. Yeah. And others. Or the the fucking movie with Ryan. With Ryan Reynolds. Yes, yeah. So he basically did that for the last year.

SPEAKER_02 1:27

Yeah. But didn't they do that with like every character kind of? Is they're all in their own, like the trans girl never leaves her bedroom this whole season.

SPEAKER_06 1:36

They're like all in their own sex work journey from what I've heard. I haven't seen it, but I heard everybody does sex work.

SPEAKER_02 1:42

This is actually so great because on my segment notes for an episode, I had Euphoria update, and I was like, I don't think I have any updates on Euphoria.

SPEAKER_05 1:52

I'm glad I was able to cross that off the list for you.

SPEAKER_01 1:55

Without even knowing.

SPEAKER_06 1:59

Well, except for you, a little bit.

SPEAKER_05 2:00

Yeah, a little bit. And Jacob Ballorty dies uh because a rattlesnake goes in his breathing tube in the and that's how you die. And it wasn't planned. It's uh even in the show.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

That was just improv, is that yeah.

SPEAKER_05 2:12

Yeah, actually the rattlesnake just kind of showed up on set and they were like, oh, let's work him in. Yeah, this works. This works. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

Uh so that's a bottle episode.

SPEAKER_05 2:20

Yeah, he really fucking died.

SPEAKER_02 2:22

And then they brought him back in Frankenstein. That's that's why they had to do that movie.

SPEAKER_05 2:27

I was trying to describe how people's heads looked after hair transplants, and I used the example of Jacob Ballorty's Frankenstein. It kind of looks like that. That's what Turkish people look like.

SPEAKER_06 2:40

Not all Turkish people get hair transplants. That's why they invented it. Everyone that goes to Turkey gets transplants.

SPEAKER_05 2:45

No, every Turkish person is born with a hair transplant, and it's part of their culture, and that's why. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 2:51

I'm so uneducated.

SPEAKER_05 2:52

Yeah, dude, it's fine. Just go to Turkey, educate yourself, get yourself some veneers, a hair transplant. Yes, I need some pearly white.

SPEAKER_02 2:59

The other thing that you don't notice is that the people who have had hair transplants also have had brain transplants. That's the other bleeding from the skull. And so when Jude tells you to get your mind right in Turkey, he's also saying get a brain transplant.

SPEAKER_06 3:14

They're all ser they become servants of Erdogan.

SPEAKER_05 3:17

Yes. Okay, so last time, or last tangent, part of this tangent, okay. A friend has you know, friend of a friend has is the manager of one of these like hotels in Turkey where people go to get hair transplants, and she said that like they go through pillowcases like because of all the blood on them. Yeah, so she's like, it's just like uh an expense that we have to deal with. It's totally logical, yeah, but really disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 3:49

My landlord is uh, you know, Jesus Christ. He's I keep hitting this fucking cord. Yeah, my landlord is Jesus Christ. Um, but no, he is like Jesus Christ, uh a carpenter, a landscaper, he's a general contractor.

SPEAKER_03 4:07

Riding around on a dump.

SPEAKER_05 4:09

This is gonna cost me about like five thousand. Uh we got to do the replacements on the wood.

SPEAKER_01 4:15

People misspell Jesus. It's actually spelled with a G. He's a G C was a G C.

SPEAKER_03 4:20

Is it G C Ezus?

SPEAKER_05 4:21

His name is Ezus, and he's a G C.

SPEAKER_01 4:23

G C was a general contractor.

SPEAKER_05 4:25

Yeah, I'm gonna have to call my guy uh Paul. He can kind of do this shit. I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 4:31

We hit a water main, it's bad. They're gonna crucify me for this one.

SPEAKER_02 4:37

It's like mana from heaven. Um, so uh he's a general contractor. He's a you know, he's a he's a property manager. And uh he was saying, like, when you go in and do jobs back in like, you know, even just five, six years ago, when you're talking about like nails, those those little things, those things are just expected on a job because you have to do the general work. Uh, you're just like that's part of cost. That's just factored in and you don't even think about it. And now, right now, it's like, oh, that's another like few thousand dollars on top of a job. So that ends up going into billing as an additional thing, whether it's like you know, if it's a fifty thousand dollar job or like a two thousand dollar job, you now have to figure out like how much are the small supplies going to be.

SPEAKER_05 5:21

Yeah. Um I do the same thing with my daycare center that I run. Yeah. For nails. Specifically.

SPEAKER_06 5:29

A lot of nails there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:31

But that's like for the pillows, it's like that used to just be like, oh, that's sunk cost. We understand that that just goes into everything in the but now it's like if a guy's a big bleeder, they're getting like a pillow charge. Yeah, it's called the bleeder surcharge.

SPEAKER_05 5:46

Yeah, and that's one bad egg just ruins it for everybody. Like one exceptionally doughy fucking head ruins it for everybody.

SPEAKER_06 5:55

Double case it so it doesn't bleed onto the pillows themselves.

SPEAKER_05 5:58

In this economy, hell no. Especially on Turkey.

SPEAKER_06 6:00

Well, I don't know what the economy in Turkey is like.

SPEAKER_02 6:02

Well, the tariffs, you know. The tariffs. The tariffs. It's hurting them and not us.

SPEAKER_06 6:09

The pillow economy is down. Down. You heard it here first. Boo-doo. Invest now. I oh, that didn't even mean that.

SPEAKER_05 6:17

Oh, that was oh I was like, that is the next level. Yeah, that's the next level play on the word.

SPEAKER_02 6:24

Welcome to Squeak Wills. It's a sequel podcast. It is also a lifestyle podcast, but first we believe that every movie deserves a sequel. For a moment, we thought that everything deserved a sequel, right, Jude?

SPEAKER_05 6:37

Yeah, we did think that. I think we went back on that. After careful review.

SPEAKER_02 6:43

Yeah. A few things might need sequels.

SPEAKER_05 6:46

Yeah, a few things, not everything. Everything. We got into a big mess.

SPEAKER_02 6:51

Yeah. Uh so we're still floundering about in our search for meaning and search for purpose, but we will continue to give movies sequels for the time being. Um we are a lifestyle podcast that used to be about gumpism. Then, you know, we're we're we're looking for that.

SPEAKER_05 7:06

Um, but right now we're like cafeteria gumpist right now. Yeah. We have like the Vatican II for gumpism. It's like now it's like anybody can kind of join, so it's like not as special. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:18

Um, I'm on a I feel like I'm on a little bit of a different journey, and that's okay, and I'm gonna talk a little bit about that, but you might feel a little different vibe in the room. Uh, whatever that is, whether it's coming from Jude, coming from me, or coming from Shrimps, our wonderful guest for today.

SPEAKER_06 7:33

Hey.

SPEAKER_02 7:34

Hey. How are you, Shrimps?

SPEAKER_06 7:36

Oh, I'm just dandy.

SPEAKER_02 7:38

So if you're feeling dandy, if you feel shrimp feeling dandy and that makes you feel dandy, go with that vibe. We are a lifestyle podcast. We believe in the voice.

SPEAKER_05 7:49

We love the voice and we wait for its return episode. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:55

Everybody makes that joke.

SPEAKER_02 7:59

Um, and I still, there's a new host of The Voice, I believe, this year.

SPEAKER_05 8:04

There is?

SPEAKER_02 8:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 8:06

Yeah, it's called Swerve the Car.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

It's uh just an AI like character.

SPEAKER_05 8:11

Yeah, the voice that's telling you. The voice in your head, the voice in Jude's head. Swerve in oncoming traffic.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

Yo, that song was swerve!

SPEAKER_05 8:20

Yo, that song was good. Maybe you should do it.

SPEAKER_02 8:24

Um, all of a sudden the little cartoon AI car dances and goes like, this song makes me swerve. That's cool.

SPEAKER_06 8:31

I will be tuning in. I've never watched a single season, but it's like I'm interested.

SPEAKER_02 8:35

It's like when they had Grimes on the singing show. Oh, yeah. She was like, This is so Fortnite.

SPEAKER_06 8:42

This is high tech, and will I am. We want to talk about that show enough. Alter Ego.

SPEAKER_02 8:47

Alter Ego, one of my favorite competition shows ever. Yeah. Um, we are also uh podcast about brothers loving each other. Um true. Specifically Jersey and I. Jersey, I miss you. Come back to the podcast soon. You need to bring balance back. You need to update us on what's going on on Reddit and social media because Jude and I don't check this up. We will not look at it.

SPEAKER_05 9:08

Yeah, and also Jordan. Yeah, we're off social, and Jordan's getting a little upbitty too, so I think he should get his little uh little slap on the wrist.

SPEAKER_01 9:15

You need my little big brother butt blast blast?

SPEAKER_05 9:18

You need your little brother butt blast.

SPEAKER_02 9:22

Um, yeah, that's that's kind of what we believe in. Uh speaking to that um vibe, Jude, would you believe that I have another story about my family more? Oh, I can't.

SPEAKER_05 9:34

Honestly, it's getting crazy. You told Shrimp about how your dad died because he came too hard, right? Yeah, shrimp's nuts. I was hoping that was gonna be the story.

SPEAKER_02 9:41

No, we've already talked about that one. We talked about the AI baby. AI baby, yeah, yeah, yeah. We had a baby, we had AI baby, it's a boy. I had an AI baby, it's a boy. Um, but uh there probably are other family stories that I have to tell you, but instead I have something much more important that Shrimps has also actually already heard about. But. And this one is actually more for you, Stephanie.

SPEAKER_01 10:04

I went to a place in Vegas that was Johnny Max. I had sliced beef on a very special roll. It tasted good when I ate it with horseradish and jew. You guessed it. I had whack. I loved it. Oh my god! I loved it. I loved it.

SPEAKER_05 10:25

I ate whack. I I actually could hear Charlie XEX in the background. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You had your first beef on whack?

SPEAKER_02 10:34

I had my first beef on wick in Nevada.

SPEAKER_05 10:37

In Nevada? Beef on wack? That's crazy, that shouldn't be there. Was it on uh Kimmelick? It had to have been. Kimmelick is okay, so they call them Kimmelick buns.

SPEAKER_02 10:48

Oh yeah, no, that's what is that's beef on wek, right? It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 10:52

And but it's actually caraway seeds.

SPEAKER_02 10:54

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 10:55

Yes. Oh my god, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 10:57

Yeah, because if it was just beef on a roll with horseradish and jus, that's that's a roast beef sandwich.

SPEAKER_05 11:02

Classic beef. So so Oh what the They're importing wec. They're importing wec? Yeah. From over the border. Yeah. Getting it illegally. Uh is it like a Buffalo theme place?

SPEAKER_02 11:15

Uh it is a New York sports bar. Oh, yeah. Yeah, on the Water Street district of uh Henderson, Nevada.

SPEAKER_05 11:22

That's wild. Okay, so give me your uh I need, you know, we need to like establish rankings for beef on wick, like juiciness level out of ten.

SPEAKER_02 11:31

Oh, it was fantastic. It was a beautiful sandwich. The horseradish was horseradishing, which I always loved. Yeah. I had been to a Poke Bowl spot the day before and I was just like scooping scoops of wasabi hoping to feel something. Yes. And then I had this beef on wick, and the horseradish was like, ooh, ooh!

SPEAKER_05 11:50

Oh, I woke you up every time. Oh, I want to wake you up. Oh, the best is when they like do the layering of the beef perfectly so it looks like a little bit of like a like a pussy. Hell yes!

SPEAKER_06 12:01

Hell yes!

SPEAKER_05 12:02

That shit is awesome. When the Kimmelwick is just like open like a little bit, like a little crease, and then like a little bit of like the the beef is coming out.

SPEAKER_06 12:10

I don't even like roast beef, but I order it just for that.

SPEAKER_05 12:13

Dude. I love it when meat looks like a pussy. It is really inspiring.

SPEAKER_02 12:20

Okay, just to get you off of talking about that.

SPEAKER_05 12:24

You said it was like said, Jordan, your dad. Before he almost died.

SPEAKER_06 12:29

Okay, just if it was the reverse, and I was like, I don't even like pussy. I just like roast beef. Oh, get out of here. What the hell? Hey, but I love roast beef so much. I only date women.

SPEAKER_01 12:42

I'll eat pussy because it looks like roast beef.

SPEAKER_05 12:44

Yeah, because I'm confused. Okay, wait, stop.

SPEAKER_01 12:49

I said stop this conversation. We're off the rails.

SPEAKER_06 12:51

This is a bottle episode. Stop this conversation.

SPEAKER_02 12:54

Well, it is kind of a bottle episode because we are doing our recap of movies. But before we get to that, you said something about my parents' quick update. My sister told me that my mom is like bragging about how much her and my dad have sex to Amber. She's like, you won't believe it. Yeah. She's like, since we moved to Florida, we are just, it's changed everything.

SPEAKER_05 13:18

The hot weather.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

Yeah, the hot weather.

SPEAKER_05 13:21

Or it could have been Cialis, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 13:25

Yeah, they might they're on a lot of like supplements and drugs now.

SPEAKER_05 13:29

That kind of makes it kind of tracks, though. Like him out down there. He had a heart attack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you can get him in gas stations. You can get him for free. Dude, you can get it for f I know if I'll give you a gun. You know, I'll give he'll give you that shit for free. Dude, that's good though. Um, it's horrifying for your sister. I feel really fucking bad. Is she kind of like shove it in her face? Like, what's what's what's your sister's husband's name?

SPEAKER_02 13:50

Uh, ex-husband uh is uh he who shall not be named. He like lives in a house that was given to him by my sister's dad. He's like a shut-in. He writes travel articles. Um and he's just like JD Salinger, like growing withered and old in his fingernails.

SPEAKER_05 14:14

He's like he writes travel articles. That's very interesting, actually. That's wild, yeah. I'd like to bring him on. He starts writing about places that don't exist. He's like, visit Orantium. But it's like very mundane. It's like, don't go to the welcome center. It was terrible.

SPEAKER_06 14:32

Yeah, give out any Cialis at the visitor center. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 14:36

Dude, they should start doing that. Like every state visitor center should have something that they give you that's like a little fucked up.

SPEAKER_02 14:42

Yeah, this is like a native mushroom. It's gotta be a pill. It's gotta be a pill. It's all in pill form. But it's yeah, it can be anything. So it's like here's a native mushroom that is, you know, to our region, our certain certain cows, they produce it. It's one of the most psychotropic events you can ever have in your life.

SPEAKER_05 14:58

Yeah, it could be a cube of beef bouillon. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. And they're like, you've got 80 miles to go until the next rest station, so they're all right.

SPEAKER_01 15:08

It provides fucking savory delight and sustenance for the next four days when consumers.

SPEAKER_05 15:14

And they're like, I'm just here for the roast beef. I'm just here for the meat pussy.

SPEAKER_02 15:18

Yeah, and then you stop bringing it up. But then, but then they gesture to a field filled with fertile women.

SPEAKER_03 15:27

And you're like, I've I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 15:29

That's a lot of rose beef. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 15:32

I don't.

SPEAKER_05 15:32

I'm thinking Arby's.

SPEAKER_02 15:34

Please don't keep bringing this up because you know it annoys me. I know, I know. Um, no, I mean, please don't keep I know you will because you know it annoys me. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'm begging you, please don't. Um, so we are on our recap episode. Yeah. Um in our recap era. Yeah, we have done uh we've done four movies. We haven't talked about them for a while because of all of this. I forgot. Yeah, we did four movies. We did kindergarten cop, remember? We did Mrs. Doubtfire. You were there. Yes. We did um Casablanca. I was there for that too. And we did Avatar series. So, um, the first thing that I want to talk about is uh, of course, Kindergarten Cop. Right. What do you guys, you know, your memories of kindergarten cop, how do you feel? That was our first Nas episode.

SPEAKER_05 16:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:32

Uh so Shrimps, you were uh actually ousted there. And from what Jersey told us, um our fandom, there's like two eras of our uh podcast, and there's the dark era, which is every episode before Nas appeared on the show.

SPEAKER_01 16:53

And then the glorious golden era afterwards.

SPEAKER_05 16:56

But some people but some people on the subret really, really like the dark era.

SPEAKER_02 17:00

Like it doesn't mean bad, it just means it is the darkness.

SPEAKER_05 17:04

They view it as darkness, there's a dark exactly there's a or yeah, we do not exist in this good and evil binary like water. Yeah, so that that really woke me up when Jersey was reading those posts. I was getting like really fucking like that.

SPEAKER_02 17:20

But just an update on that. In the dark era, our most listened to episode is wrap it up with shrimps.

SPEAKER_00 17:27

Yeah, let's go.

SPEAKER_05 17:29

I guess people are like, oh, shrimp wrap, that sounds delicious. Yeah, it's misleading.

SPEAKER_02 17:33

They think they're getting like a platter of shrimp along with the podcast episode. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 17:38

Yeah, I just haven't mailed that out yet. So it's me versus Nas in terms of the dark versus the gilded.

SPEAKER_02 17:45

Once again, I don't think we're looking at a binary. Everything needs balance. Sure. I think the YouTube bring different energies. I could see that. Yeah, we'll let um our our fans vote probably on who they like more.

SPEAKER_05 17:59

Yeah, definitely. Nas has a Greek grandpa whose nickname was Nacho in a small Greek village, which I still think about probably like once a day.

SPEAKER_06 18:07

How am I supposed to compete with that? I don't fucking know, dude. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 18:10

Come up with a cute ass little immigrant story like that.

SPEAKER_05 18:13

Yeah. Alright, I'll lie. I'll start making stuff.

SPEAKER_06 18:15

Yeah, make stuff up about your grandpa. You're like, it's easy. It's one of the most beautiful parts of life being able to lie.

SPEAKER_02 18:23

Hell to the fucking yeah. Um have you ever watched a kindergarten cop? No. No, I haven't. Oh god. You gotta. You would love it. Yeah, it's really just like a good time throughout. A buddy movie. No.

SPEAKER_06 18:39

It's not? No, Danny DeVito?

SPEAKER_02 18:41

No. No, that's twins. Uh kindergarten cop is kind of a solo affair from Schwarzenegger where it starts off like a hard-boiled, kind of like violent crime, almost like Robocop levels violence. Yeah. And then it transitions into kind of like a bucolic, like feel-good family film. Yeah, he likes that then devolves back into action at the end.

SPEAKER_05 19:06

Kind of like witness protection. Well, like he's going undercover with a partner.

SPEAKER_02 19:11

Um they get super sick from eating like an egg salad sandwich from a vending machine.

SPEAKER_05 19:16

Yeah, so then like Aron Schwarzenegger has to take on the role of kindergarten teacher, and at first he hates the kids, but then the kids actually end up teaching him a lesson. And then but you can tell, like, in the movie, it's actually he does like a very good job at being like a tender actor with the kids, kind of like grows to teach them that kind of shit. Um but yeah, it's great. Um, but I did see like a group of kids walking down Steinway the other day that are about the age of kindergarten cop, and I was thinking like, these kids are like so stupid. Like, none of these kids are like kindergarten cops. You know, like I was like, damn, the kids in that movie are stupid. They would not have connected with Arnold. No, absolutely not. They would have just been drooling.

SPEAKER_02 19:53

Yeah, you see these kids, they're attached on like a leash chain. Yes, like a chain gang. Yeah, a little chain gang of kids, and you're like, these kids, you know, they don't have the brain power because of screens. Yes, yes, iPad, zombies, iPhone. Get off those things. Yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_06 20:11

I would look at a TV screen instead.

SPEAKER_02 20:14

Yes, watch a movie like kindergarten cards.

SPEAKER_05 20:17

If it were up to me, I would take all those kids that they put on like chain gangs, I would lead them into a casino, and then I would have them like play the penny slots for me. Because they would know how to like press all the buttons and stuff. They love doing that. Collect the jackpot.

SPEAKER_02 20:33

Yeah, create your own little supercomputer.

SPEAKER_05 20:36

That's how the first computer was invented.

SPEAKER_02 20:38

It's like a Bitcoin mining device, but just IRL Bitcoin mining.

SPEAKER_05 20:43

I was just thinking like there's a lot more useful things these kids on leashes could be doing. Yeah, than long. They're not being put to work. They don't put kids to work anymore. No, they don't. It's just like a fucking like two Latina women just arguing about something.

SPEAKER_02 20:56

This is an actual conversation that like two you know 65-year-old men in Florida are.

SPEAKER_05 21:03

I was thinking about like a tech guy in San Francisco.

SPEAKER_02 21:05

He's like There's very little difference, but then fundamentally.

SPEAKER_05 21:10

Oh, really, Ron?

SPEAKER_02 21:12

I think that they could be doing something. I mean, what are they? We're putting them in the schools, teaching them how to be trans cats.

SPEAKER_05 21:18

What are those uh what are what are those things they put in the wheels, the gerbils? Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:24

We could be doing that with all the I don't want to say it, but all the fan sows out there, get them running.

SPEAKER_06 21:30

Well, anyway, we don't want to be on electric though.

SPEAKER_05 21:32

Yeah, and then he like pulls out chat GPT. Gas only. Gas only. He pulls out chat GPT and he's like, look, Ron, I made us Chinese.

SPEAKER_06 21:41

All these electric cars are for communists. But I except for Elon Musk. Oh, Elon Musk. He's a good one. He's a genius. I won't drive an electric car because I don't want people to think I'm gay.

SPEAKER_05 21:53

Yeah, I actually don't want okay, I'm gonna go off a little tangent here. I don't want anyone to judge me, but I did spend a lot of time trying to. Make pictures of me and my friends Chinese on ChatGPT and it wouldn't do it. For a joke. I don't need to. No, it wasn't for Larry, it was for me. I didn't even show it to anybody.

SPEAKER_01 22:12

But like I could Because the results were horrifying.

SPEAKER_05 22:15

No, they were awesome. Thanks, ChatGPT. It wouldn't do Chinese, but it would do Japanese.

SPEAKER_06 22:22

What's the what's the rub here?

SPEAKER_02 22:25

I was hoping that you weren't gonna say what's the difference.

SPEAKER_06 22:28

I was not gonna say that. I know the difference. I've been to school. You don't have to you don't have to impress me. I'm not impressive.

SPEAKER_05 22:38

Good.

SPEAKER_06 22:38

I think the rub you only. So I can be better than Nas and they'll vote for me.

SPEAKER_05 22:44

Vote for me. No, but I'm asking you, seriously though. I had to be like, because the way that I prompted it, I was like, hey, I wonder what me and my group of beloved friends would look like if we were all uh had been from China, and it was like, I'm sorry, this violates our guidelines, I'm not doing that. Same exact verbiage, but I said from Japan, did it in 30 seconds.

SPEAKER_06 23:07

Interesting.

SPEAKER_05 23:08

Not not exaggerating. Well, how did it come out? Looks great.

SPEAKER_06 23:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 23:13

ChatGPT is a great product, very user-friendly. Yeah. Um, I think that's uh I mean it's concerning. I think that there are people talking about AI that are much more, you know, like there's that whole John Oliver fucking segment he just did about how people are like finding ways to get pipe bomb instructions and all that stuff.

SPEAKER_05 23:33

AI psychosis.

SPEAKER_02 23:34

Yeah, people going into AI psychosis. I'm already there. Maybe I should do that.

SPEAKER_05 23:37

I'm pretty much um I think I'm Japanese at this point.

SPEAKER_02 23:40

If you're worried that like our current state of AI is like showing bias to the Chinese government or something, I think that's like just pile that on top of everything.

SPEAKER_05 23:52

Yeah, add it to the field.

SPEAKER_06 23:53

So you're becoming like the Rachel Dolezal of Japan.

SPEAKER_05 23:56

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. Um, but then I did, I did, I well, I don't have that many degrees. It's crazy, like she had so many degrees, and like she's that's wild, man. Well, you could have a degree, dude. But not like that, not like the lozzle. But like, dude, I I did Swedish, I did Persian, and I did um Mormon. And the Mormon one was so free.

SPEAKER_02 24:23

I can't believe he didn't do Filipino with how obsessed he is with Filipino people.

SPEAKER_05 24:27

I didn't either. No, I did Nepalese, because I thought I could get around. I was trying to get around the China thing. I was trying to do like the pipe bomb thing. Right. I was like, doing that to make me Chinese. How close can I get to China? Yes. And I was like, imagine me and my friends are like Kurdistani border, but like very close and were ethnically Chinese. You know what I mean? Like trying to get it to it, and it's like, we we see what you're doing here, you know?

SPEAKER_06 24:50

And they put the kibosh on immediately.

SPEAKER_05 24:52

Well, the Nepalese one, it made us like very like offensively Nepalese. Like it made a like dress like Sherpas? Yeah, and like the red dots and everything, and like all the jewelry, and I was like, oh wow.

SPEAKER_06 25:03

Not surprised that at some point it took an offense.

SPEAKER_05 25:05

And I'm like, please make me Chinese. Please make me specifically Chinese. That's true.

SPEAKER_01 25:10

Alright, Jude, two things. Get the fuck off ChatGPT. Stop using AI for this shit. Yes, that is true. That's the first thing. To get if get the fuck off TikTok, stop you.

SPEAKER_05 25:21

TikTok is the best. I don't touch it. Dude, that algorithm is so crazy. One of us has crazy do one bad thing.

SPEAKER_06 25:27

You're the ChatGPT guy, or I'm the TikTok guy. What do you do?

SPEAKER_02 25:31

Chronically masturbate.

SPEAKER_05 25:33

Alright. Dude, it can help you with that too. I know. Help you do it more. Both of them.

SPEAKER_02 25:38

So, um you know, Bruce uh Arnold Schwarzenegger goes into this kindergarten, takes on a different role, eventually they find out he's a cop, he's not a teacher. There's that moment of like betrayal, but then the the principal says, You might not be a kindergarten teacher, but you're the best I've seen in a while. You know, because he really brings the kids around to him. Um and uh I thought about that. If you're like a school kid and some your teacher is like something other than what they say they are, you know? And how frightening that could be, but also how exciting that could be. If maybe your teacher is an alien, a great book series that I loved when I was a kid. My teacher is an alien. I understand. There's another book series called the Bailey Street School Kids. Are you familiar with these?

SPEAKER_05 26:30

No, I'm only familiar with the boxcar children.

SPEAKER_02 26:32

Okay. Well, the Bailey Street School Kids would often have uh mythic or fantastical beings woven into their lives, and there are these little like cute mysteries about them like suspecting that perhaps uh, you know, their teacher's uh genie or like that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_06 26:53

That's interesting. I was when you brought it up originally, I was imagining something much darker.

SPEAKER_02 27:00

So the teacher my teacher is in alien books, those are those are rather dark for like kids' fiction. But these are a bit lighthearted and goofy often. Okay. Uh with names like wayside school. Yes. Okay. Very much so. Uh with names like Werewolves Don't Go to Summer Camp. Um people might be remembering as I bring these up the very iconic illustrations on the covers of these books, uh, usually like fun. Um you two imagine along with me right now as I as I read a couple more off to you. Santa Claus doesn't mop floors. Hmm. Leprechauns don't play basketball. I remember that one so very specifically.

SPEAKER_05 27:39

It kind of like looks like I'm picturing YouTube thumbnails very easily, you know? Like Santa Claus doesn't mop these floors.

SPEAKER_02 27:48

And there's a big red arrow pointing to like a blurry security camera footage.

SPEAKER_03 27:53

Yeah, you won't believe what Santa Claus won't do.

SPEAKER_02 27:56

Um so I've collected a number of them, and I'm going to read them off to you. And I want you to tell me if these were real books in the series or fake books that I made up in the series. Okay. Are you ready? Yes. Frankenstein doesn't plant petunias.

SPEAKER_05 28:13

That sounds real. I'm gonna say fake.

SPEAKER_02 28:16

It's real. Fuck me. Um dude, fuck me. Poltergeists don't win spelling bees.

SPEAKER_05 28:23

I'm going fake for that one. Oh fake as well.

SPEAKER_02 28:26

It is fake. I made that one up. Skeletons don't play tubas.

SPEAKER_05 28:33

That could be misleading. I'm going fake. I'll fake because it sucks.

SPEAKER_02 28:37

Uh it's true, but it like how would they? Because they don't have lips and the tuba is a brass.

SPEAKER_06 28:42

Yeah, what's a classic lip forward instrument.

SPEAKER_02 28:45

Cupid doesn't flip hamburgers.

SPEAKER_06 28:48

Who?

SPEAKER_02 28:48

Cupid doesn't flip hamburgers. So they're bringing in some sort of like mythos now.

SPEAKER_06 28:52

No, I'm like, that's true for that.

SPEAKER_02 28:55

Uh it is true. Good. I didn't even get to guess. I that's what I said. I said true. We're just gonna have to blitz through these because I have a lot of them. Wizards don't cheat on standardized tests. False. That is false. I bring that one up. Gremlins don't chew bubblegum. True. False. True. Dracula doesn't drink lemonade. True. True. That is true. That's a classic one. Mummies don't coach softball. True. False. True. Angels don't know karate. False. False. That's true. Oh no! God exists.

SPEAKER_03 29:33

The only blank spot. God fucked up one thing.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

Unicorns don't give sleigh rides. False. True. True. Knights don't teach piano. True. True. Which is like now it's just knights. It's just like a kind of person.

SPEAKER_06 29:50

Yeah, just different occupations. Yeah, Dracula. Why don't they?

SPEAKER_05 29:57

But Dracula is like the name of like a specific vampire.

SPEAKER_02 30:00

Yeah, well, does Dracula Dracula doesn't like Salisbury steak? That's true, I feel like. That's false.

SPEAKER_05 30:07

Yeah, but the thing is like Dracula, but other vampires might be. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 30:10

It's no sweat up. Very specifically we've already had a Dracula. So Dracula is a recurring character, it seems, in in these book series. Hercules doesn't pull teeth. False. False. True. He's very big and strong. Of course he can pull teeth. Big boys don't bounce basketballs. That's definitely.

SPEAKER_03 30:35

Okay, it's true. It's false.

SPEAKER_00 30:37

No.

SPEAKER_02 30:38

Frankenstein doesn't slam hockey pucks. False. True. That's true. Ninjas don't bake pumpkin pie. True. Once again, just an uh occupation.

SPEAKER_06 30:48

Yeah, occupation.

SPEAKER_02 30:50

True. True. True. Abe Lincoln doesn't look like a loser. False. False, yeah. Dracula don't do drugs. False. Dracula doesn't rock and roll. True. It's true. He does do drugs. He does do drugs, so he does rock and roll. Dracula doesn't run track and field. False. False. False. That's false. You got it. The bride of Frankenstein doesn't bake cookies. False. True. True. We've introduced the bride of Frankenstein now.

SPEAKER_05 31:23

Oh no.

SPEAKER_02 31:24

Robots don't catch chicken pox. True. True.

SPEAKER_05 31:29

True. How could they? How could they? Have we never talked about Mrs. Frankenstein's thing? Frankenstein doesn't start food fights.

SPEAKER_02 31:36

Shut the fuck up, true. Frankenstein doesn't start food fights. That's true. That's true. It's a classic one, I think. Frankenstein's kid didn't kill his parents and bury them behind their home.

SPEAKER_06 31:48

That should be false.

SPEAKER_02 31:49

Yeah, that's false. Imps don't investigate the murder of the Frankenstein. That's true. That's false. Oh, this is okay, so New York. You're hearing it in the background.

SPEAKER_03 32:01

The imps, dude!

SPEAKER_02 32:02

The impre. The imps are here. We've revealed too much. So a new part of this podcast is there's a fourth guest, and it's always the city of New York.

SPEAKER_05 32:11

Yo, sometimes I feel like I'm fucking dating this city.

SPEAKER_02 32:16

Until I leave New York, the city of New York will always be the third guest up here. No. No. I feel like I'm just saying T T FN.

SPEAKER_05 32:28

TTFN? And then showing like wagging your dick around. Yeah. Uh see you next time.

SPEAKER_02 32:34

Um, so imps uh don't investigate the murder of Frankenstein's. That's false. I made that up. The cigarette smoking man from the X-Files doesn't frame children for murder to cover up national conspiracies. False. I hope the smoking man's in this one. That's true. That's false. Uh dogs are actually interdimensional beings running a shadow government behind our government, and they are installing dark beings like monsters and mythical figures into our children's school system to brainwash them and prepare them for the twisted future that is about to beset humanity.

SPEAKER_05 33:05

Dogs do be doing that, so I'm gonna have to go with true. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:08

That one is true. That one is true.

SPEAKER_05 33:10

Good.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

So that's the Bailey Street School Kids segment.

SPEAKER_01 33:15

Good segment.

SPEAKER_05 33:16

Nice, nice little fit there throwback.

SPEAKER_06 33:19

Um would we say that ACAP applies to the kindergarten cop?

SPEAKER_02 33:26

Yeah. Okay. Oh, he's he's a horrible policeman. He he just goes into like dens and shoots up people that don't like him, you know?

SPEAKER_05 33:35

He does shoot a couple Latinos like right off the bat. Yeah, the guy's like, you can't come in here, and then he's just like Aw, you think about that? What does he say?

SPEAKER_04 33:45

He's like, No, he says something like um Oh, I'm going to be with you every holiday weekend. Oh yeah. After work, before work.

SPEAKER_02 33:59

This woman is scared of um the man that they're trying to like get in jail, and they she has vital information on how he like killed this guy.

SPEAKER_05 34:09

She also has a bit of a drug problem.

SPEAKER_02 34:10

She has a bit of a drug problem. And so he goes into this den, blows all these guys away, and then sits down next to her on a couch and he's like, You, if you don't want to, you know, give a statement, I will be watching you with you every day like your best friend. And he just like really intimidates.

unknown 34:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 34:31

Yeah, well, he's trying to get put this guy behind bars.

SPEAKER_02 34:35

Uh by any means necessary.

SPEAKER_05 34:36

By any means necessary.

SPEAKER_02 34:38

Which honestly, I wish cops thought about more. It's like, why isn't crime taken care of?

SPEAKER_05 34:44

Yeah, dude. Well, like, why can't we just do it on a Tuesday? Sometimes, if like you got a chore to do, you just gotta get it done. And that way you're like, it's all done. But these police officers, they're too busy fucking eating donuts on their iPads.

SPEAKER_06 34:56

On their iPads, too much screen time, dude.

SPEAKER_05 34:59

Yeah. Too much screen time. That's why I'm gonna use the kid. The kid the kid should be on the screens. The cops should be solving the crimes.

SPEAKER_06 35:09

Or teaching the kids if they are perhaps better at that, like a kindergarten cop. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 35:15

He found out he was bad cop, good kindergarten teacher. Don't do drugs. Don't do drugs. Next movie. Next movie, uh, we had Casa Blanca. Um, this was kind of a lost episode with Sarah Rose Kaplan. Jude and I had such a blast uh with her, talking with her, chatting with her, and we only got like tiny little segments from that conversation.

SPEAKER_05 35:42

Um and it was just done. It just wasn't into it.

SPEAKER_02 35:45

Yeah. Uh not a good time in that regard. Um, Jude, your remembrances on Casablanca?

SPEAKER_05 35:53

Casablanca, um Spanish means White House. Um, there weren't enough MMA fights in front of the Casablanca for me to uh really uh have a very visceral visceral memory of it, but I I have been thinking about the blue parrot, which is like the other club that's not takes place, you know? Um and that place is yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a little it's a little stinky in there, you know? They got birds all over the place, a little stinky look full of like fat guys. Um that's what you were thinking about? Yeah, dude. I was thinking about how stinky it is, and I'm thinking about like what kind of it doesn't have to be stinky. Oh dude, it looked it has wild animals in there.

SPEAKER_06 36:36

Like Alright, the wild animals might have a stink to them.

SPEAKER_05 36:39

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But um But yeah, Rick uh did I say Jake? Yeah. I said Jake's place?

SPEAKER_02 36:46

Yeah, that's okay.

SPEAKER_05 36:47

Oh, okay. Dude, I was thinking of fucking Chinatown. Um oh I got China on my brain. Uh but anyway, yeah, Rick's place. Uh Blue Parrot, I I wish I could hang out there more. I wish I I wanna be there. I wanna see like the sequel of Casablanca happening at the Blue Parrot.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

You should go to Morocco.

SPEAKER_05 37:04

I should.

SPEAKER_02 37:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 37:06

I should, I should, I fucking should.

SPEAKER_02 37:08

Experience other cultures. Or go wherever that was shot, which was probably just in like Northern California. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 37:14

Go to Turkey.

SPEAKER_06 37:14

Turkey? Get a hair transplant. Get a veneer.

SPEAKER_05 37:17

Get your mind right. Um, how do we feel about that? How do we how do we all feel about Casablanca? Casablanca.

SPEAKER_02 37:23

Uh Alex still hasn't seen it. I've never seen it. I never will. Um and I never will. This is also just a preview for our upcoming episode, Basketball Diaries, in which Alex is going to write the sequel to Basketball Diaries without ever watching the movie.

SPEAKER_06 37:38

Yes. I don't even know what it's about.

SPEAKER_02 37:40

Yeah. Dude, it's about the Knicks.

SPEAKER_06 37:42

Hell yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:43

Hell yeah, go Knicks. Knicks and five, Nixon Five, Nixon Five.

SPEAKER_05 37:50

And I won the basketball game. I won the game. And that was awesome.

SPEAKER_02 37:53

Um, how would you how surprised would you be to find out that a lot of Casablanca actually takes place in the black market?

SPEAKER_06 38:02

How surprised would I be?

SPEAKER_02 38:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 38:04

Surprised.

SPEAKER_02 38:05

Oh, oh yes. The entire thing. When we talk about Rick's place, when we talk about the blue parrot, those are both centers, hubs of a black market.

SPEAKER_05 38:13

I'm putting on my sunglasses to let you know. There's some illicit activity going on in fucking fucking Rick's place, dude. That sounds like my kind of bar. Yes. And if you play a certain if you if you grab the ox the wrong way in Rick's fucking place, he'll flip out and then he'll start drinking. Because if he hears that one fucking song, he loses mind and then he gets a little he gets a little wasted.

SPEAKER_06 38:35

Could you imagine being in a bar before the invention of the ox?

SPEAKER_03 38:39

That's pretty you have to watch Mesamica. You're just like literally You literally described what the movie's about. Oh, you're gonna love it.

SPEAKER_02 38:49

There's a lot of live singing and piano playing. They hire a guy just to play the piano all day.

SPEAKER_06 38:55

Yeah, and then like I say this movie's good.

SPEAKER_05 38:57

I basically just wrote it myself without even knowing what it's about. Dude, exactly. I that actually happened to me last episode when Jordan was talking about this terrible New Orleans movie. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:06

What are you afraid of? Boop. But that's just because we we think about things with the minds of writers, you know? I'll often be watching a show or a movie, and I already know the next word that the guy's gonna say. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Yes. It's not because the movie is terrible, Mardi Gras Spring Break is not a terrible movie. It's just that you were able to, as a writer, craft the same glorious story in your mind.

SPEAKER_05 39:33

Dude, they gotta make another movie kind of like Mardi Gras Spring Break, but like for a lesser um event at a lesser city.

SPEAKER_02 39:41

I was gonna say for a greater one. So like Venezuela Spring Break. Venezuela Spring Break. We gotta revitalize Venezuela.

SPEAKER_05 39:48

Yes, the president is gone. Um or Gasparilla in Tampa. In Tampa they have Gasparilla, uh, which is like shitty Mardi Gras.

SPEAKER_02 39:58

Oh, I see. I thought you meant like horrific event, how they made Mardi Gras Spring Break in response to Katrina to try to like drum up. So that's the thing. They made a tourism comedy video or movie to like redrum up tourism in New Orleans after Katrina. Okay uh starring Josh Gadd. Yes, so Gasparilla, Florida.

SPEAKER_05 40:18

And it yeah, or Gasparilla, but actually I'm gonna I'm gonna punt on my idea and go on your idea where we should do like terrible tragedies making movies to get people to feel comfortable coming there.

SPEAKER_02 40:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 40:28

Prime example, 9-11. After 9-11, they could be like, oh man, I really want to see a Broadway show. Yes. You know, and it's like, I don't know, man. Aren't there like terrorists there? And they're like, no, dude, there's something even better. It's Williamsburg, you know?

SPEAKER_06 40:44

Williamsburg 2001. Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_05 40:47

They gotta play it, and it's like Matt it's like Matt and Kim or whatever.

SPEAKER_02 40:52

And then you'd be like, pepper, is that why when I came here in 2010, it was like Williamsburg? I was like, oh, it's like if there was a hipster Disneyland. It's because it had be like they had designed that.

SPEAKER_05 41:06

Yeah, and then you yeah, they had already designed it, it was done, and you met like the from another movie, the Philip Seymour Hoffman character from uh Almost Famous, the Lester Bannings guy. Yeah. Amsterdam is over.

SPEAKER_06 41:21

You're like positing that the hipster culture of Williamsburg was to soften the vibe of it was like people don't want to go into Manhattan, so what can we what can we do?

SPEAKER_05 41:34

And they also want to feel like whimsical, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 41:37

They want to feel joy again. Yeah. And the only way to do that is like artisanal bacon sandwiches. Yes.

SPEAKER_05 41:44

Like ladies put on dresses with tights and ballet flats.

SPEAKER_02 41:48

You've heard of a mini mall. Well, this is a mini mall, you know?

SPEAKER_05 41:52

Yes, an artisanal market. I'm wearing I'm wearing the damn December shirt again, dude. It got me. Or, you know, the whole counterpoint, maybe Osama bin Laden just loved little trinkets and shit. And his whole thing was like, I gotta destroy Manhattan so that I can create Williamsburg.

SPEAKER_02 42:11

Right, more artisanal market, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 42:13

Get people eating like unpasteurized cheese and stuff. Right. Oh, what was the beer?

SPEAKER_02 42:18

What was the uh Williamsburg market called? Schmorgisboard. Schmorgisborg and oh, but the the like vintage one. I don't know. Oh fuck. I don't know either. Fuck. Vice.

SPEAKER_05 42:30

Yeah. Vice.com.

SPEAKER_02 42:31

Um so speaking of little vintage markets, speaking of smorgasburg, uh, the black market, to get back to that, I wanted to try to get onto the black market online, see what I could get, some papers maybe to escape this hellhole America that we're in. Um so I searched on Quora, like how to get on the black market, and I just found some interesting questions and posts there. The first one, uh, how would you hold buyers of gold smuggled from Africa accountable for buying black market gold below market price? So somebody was interested in how you're gonna get them to pay taxes.

SPEAKER_05 43:06

Yeah. Okay. Well, they are um they they missed the point of the black market uh completely.

SPEAKER_06 43:14

Yeah, who is we hold all these criminals accountable for doing their crime?

SPEAKER_02 43:19

That is a good question.

SPEAKER_06 43:20

It feels like this is like the head of the FBI, like Cash Patel himself.

SPEAKER_01 43:26

Let's see who really.

SPEAKER_06 43:32

How to stop crime? Who killed Charlie Kirk?

SPEAKER_01 43:36

Um there is no answers to this question. Yeah, yeah, they can smell a fed from a mile away.

SPEAKER_06 43:45

Yeah, and if someone's like, I know how to do this, next thing you know, that guy's knocking at your door.

SPEAKER_04 43:50

Uh, dude, in that Kid Rock song when he's like, I can smell a pig from a mile away.

SPEAKER_05 43:55

I used to think he was like love barbecue. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:58

And hated cops, but that's

SPEAKER_05 44:00

Cowboy. I thought cowboys like love barbecue and it's like this little period from a mile away.

SPEAKER_01 44:06

And it makes my heart leap because they're skipping me safe.

SPEAKER_04 44:10

Absolute these boys are blue today. There's a thin blue line that's keeping me safe.

SPEAKER_06 44:17

Your boot in the barbecue sauce. Oh, look it up. I'm a good little boy.

SPEAKER_01 44:22

Because I'm a little cowboy.

SPEAKER_06 44:25

Good little cowboy.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

What he was saying is that he's a cowboy baby. Not that.

SPEAKER_05 44:29

He is a cowboy baby. It's like a little like greeting card of a baby with like a lasso and some like assless jabs, and it's like, my boots. Yes.

SPEAKER_06 44:40

Gonna lick y'all boot till it shines real nice.

SPEAKER_02 44:44

Um so then this person asked, Have you ever bought something from the black market? What did you buy and how did you buy it? Maybe you know, just asking a soft question to like get, okay, like, well, how did it happen?

SPEAKER_06 44:55

You know, we never committed a crime. Could you admit to it?

SPEAKER_02 44:59

This is a this is entrapment.

SPEAKER_05 45:02

Um can you show me a picture of when the currency was exchanged?

SPEAKER_06 45:08

Do you have uh chat log perhaps of what the crime was about and maybe a location?

SPEAKER_02 45:15

Um it looks like just one person responded to this question. Uh Philippe M. Cross, just not to dox them completely, but this is Philippe M. Cross. Uh says, not really no, but I have always found Toronto's premier vintage and alternative clothing store to have interesting and cheap products.

SPEAKER_01 45:34

Thank you.

SPEAKER_06 45:36

I love an answer to a question begins with no.

SPEAKER_05 45:41

Okay, alright, wait. Sub uh quick tangent. My co-op has a Facebook group, and people will post things on it like, you know, does anybody need this uh, you know, baby monitor? Does anybody need these clothing? Uh this is left in the basement and F building, and there's an old lady on there that responds to every single post as if she thinks she has to, with like, no, not interested. That's awesome. Yes. Like every single post she responds to. Uh it's truly crazy. Well, because she thinks they're like on her page.

SPEAKER_02 46:17

I know, I know.

SPEAKER_05 46:17

Yeah, she thinks it's like for her.

SPEAKER_06 46:19

I heard many and many a tale of people of an older age bracket on dating apps responding no as well. Like people will message them and they're not interested, and there's been no exchange of messages, and they will just say like, no, sorry, I'm not interested. Which is very sweet. Yeah, but uh they don't have to do that.

SPEAKER_05 46:40

Yeah, I would love to like read. You can just not respond.

SPEAKER_02 46:45

That's true.

SPEAKER_05 46:46

Yeah, but like you didn't ghost someone in the 50s at the sock hop.

SPEAKER_02 46:49

No, no, no. You would say you would find a polite way of declining their offer and hope that you can still be friends in the future.

SPEAKER_05 46:55

Exactly. And you'd buy you'd buy you'd buy her a s you'd buy her a salted malt.

SPEAKER_01 47:05

Shrimps. Just like Johnny asked me to prom. What did you say? Well, I said yes so that he didn't beat me.

SPEAKER_06 47:13

I had to say yes, because he had a hammer in his hand.

SPEAKER_05 47:18

He had a hammer in his hand, he'd just come back from the front lines. It was that was the light had completely disappeared from his eyes, and he told me he was gonna fix me.

SPEAKER_06 47:28

Next morning I had to hightail it out of there. I moved to Timbuktu and started a new family and a new life. Well boy. You can't do it anymore because the internet.

SPEAKER_05 47:38

You can't, yeah, you can't just get a shiner anymore from your from your man.

SPEAKER_06 47:43

That's my man. You can't hightail it out of there any longer. No, you can't do it. Because of the cops, because of the internet. Doing crime is not as cool anymore either. Again, because of the internet and technology. You used to be able to get away with crime.

SPEAKER_05 47:57

Doing crime is a good idea.

SPEAKER_06 47:58

You can't get away with crime anymore.

SPEAKER_05 47:59

I can get away with crime, I'll do it again.

SPEAKER_06 48:04

I'm glad that people don't get away from a couple of things. I'm glad that they don't get away with that. But I'm I wish you could get away with like robbing a bank.

SPEAKER_01 48:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 48:14

It's a victimless crime, except for the victims that occasionally happen during that crime. But overall, if people didn't try to be a hero, there'd be no victims.

SPEAKER_02 48:25

Stop being a hero, let people rob banks specifically. And grocery stores.

SPEAKER_05 48:31

Yeah. Yeah, and if she's not interested in you, if Betty's not interested in you, you don't have to hit her with a hammer. You could just buy herself.

SPEAKER_06 48:38

You could just go on Tinder and find a million other way hotter Betty's.

SPEAKER_02 48:42

Yes.

SPEAKER_06 48:43

Oh my god. That also won't answer you, but you don't have access to that.

SPEAKER_02 48:46

Ghosting has saved humanity. That's what I'll say.

SPEAKER_06 48:50

Ghosting's not that bad.

SPEAKER_02 48:51

It's not bad. Ignore people. It's fine. It's fine.

SPEAKER_06 48:55

Um And also, on the topic of saying no with your horror thing, I feel like that should be incorporated way more. Of just responding with no and then a completely unrelated tangent.

SPEAKER_05 49:09

No, I'm not interested in this. Can you fix your mailbox?

SPEAKER_06 49:13

Yeah. No, but also.

SPEAKER_02 49:16

Let me talk about the Well that's I I'm I feel like I'm on a podcast constantly with two people who are more interested in talking about the thing that they want to talk about than the subject at hand.

SPEAKER_06 49:28

We're done with yes and the era of yes and is over. We're in the era of no buttons.

SPEAKER_02 49:32

I know. We've talked about this already before. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 49:35

It's a good principle, and I thought it would be funny at UCB, but they gave me a B plus in the class.

SPEAKER_02 49:41

And that's when I go, so back to the thing. That's me no butting what you're saying. Um Philippe M. Cross.

SPEAKER_05 49:48

What are you doing? Yeah. What the fuck's wrong with you, dude? It looks like black market.

SPEAKER_02 49:53

At first I thought it was an advertisement, like just somebody like advertising their thing. I used to think this. But then their last sponsor is just, and I have never been to Syracuse, New York, so I never got chicken wings either. And I don't know how to. Not even.

SPEAKER_05 50:07

Oh, dude, I I I'm gonna speak for Buffalo here. That Syracuse is, oh yeah. Steph's parents are very specific about this. They're like, Syracuse is not Western New York. They're like, that's Central New York. Syracuse, Ithaca, Central New York, don't fuck with it. Finger Lakes, don't fuck with it. Okay. Rochester, Buffalo, that's Western New York. That's it. Drawing the line.

SPEAKER_01 50:27

And that's the bottom line. And it's the bottom line, brother.

SPEAKER_02 50:32

What? Um, I feel like at some point, speaking of Cash Patel and the FBI, I am going to be on a watch list for just this Quora search. Because the next thing I found is what is the cure for Huntavirus pulmonary syndrome? What are its effects on the body? How much does it cost to buy it from the internet or black market?

SPEAKER_05 50:52

Oh, the huntavirus?

SPEAKER_02 50:54

Yeah, no. They want to know what the cure is, but they also want to know how much it is to buy hontavirus on the black market.

SPEAKER_05 51:00

How much is a sick rat? Can you put it free if you know where to go? Exactly, dude.

SPEAKER_06 51:06

If you can go to if you can fly out to a trash dump in Argentina, you can get hontavirus from you.

SPEAKER_05 51:11

Yeah, you just honestly, you go into the subways. I don't even think it has to be Argentina. You go into the subways, you get a little bit of rat shit, and then you like do like the you know, you put it on your hand and like blow it in somebody's face.

SPEAKER_02 51:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 51:22

You can start some.

SPEAKER_02 51:23

Yeah, you've got your own hantavirus.

SPEAKER_05 51:25

You got yourself a fucking contagion situation, boy.

SPEAKER_06 51:29

It doesn't take much to start a plague. No. People think it takes a lot, it doesn't.

SPEAKER_02 51:34

It takes a lot to uh stop a plague, actually. Yes. That's the hard one. Yeah, containing those things is very hard.

SPEAKER_06 51:43

Um three times if you count the Spanish flu.

SPEAKER_02 51:46

Yeah. Oh, there have been so many.

SPEAKER_05 51:48

Dude, this motherfucker, he has no idea what's going on. Like, I'll give him Hontavirus in Tash Patel or Jordan. Any of these guys on the internet. Oh, the Cora guy. Yeah, exactly. I will I will march over to that subway station. I'll get you Hontavirus in 11 minutes. Yeah, you don't have to pay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 52:04

I'll give it to you for free. Come to New York.

SPEAKER_02 52:08

Um this has I recently read a story about $50,000 worth of milk being stolen from a cargo truck which was transporting it. Who is buying black market milk? Why, and how does someone sell that much milk before?

SPEAKER_05 52:21

That'll be me. I'm the one buying milk. You're the black market milk. I would say libertarian. Milk is expensive.

SPEAKER_02 52:27

Libertarian babies.

SPEAKER_06 52:29

It's cheaper on the black market. And is it raw milk?

SPEAKER_02 52:32

That's what people are looking for. Yeah. All raw milk for that. In like Greenpoint and Bushwick and Williamsburg, there are those like. We talked about this?

SPEAKER_05 52:43

No.

SPEAKER_02 52:44

Oh, so there are like your um black market raw milk like hipster delivery services going on right now.

SPEAKER_05 52:51

Yeah, so it's like a drug dealer. They used to come to your house with like the backpacks, and then they like open the backpack and they're like the Swedish dank.

SPEAKER_06 53:00

Hurdled ass raw nasty dank milk. I just got this in.

SPEAKER_05 53:05

Yeah, I just got this in for Argentito. Drink that. It's called the stinking bishop.

SPEAKER_06 53:11

That's an actual cheese. I know, I know. Okay. That's why I said it. Here's a PSA. Yeah. For all the raw milk drinkers out there. Stop.

SPEAKER_01 53:20

Don't drink that. We all gotta like one bad thing. We all gotta like one bad thing. Mine is raw milk.

SPEAKER_06 53:26

Yeah, you're the raw milk. I'm Chat GPT. You're the raw milk guy. Stop drinking.

SPEAKER_05 53:35

Put it in a metal pipe and fucking smoke it. It's like that fucking bitch.

SPEAKER_06 53:39

It's like that TikTok sound. You're under spells, people. You are under spells. Stop drinking raw milk. It's nasty.

SPEAKER_02 53:51

Um Millie Stuchinsky responds. Um, her occupation is I cook food and says, you are pretty naive. What the thieves do is put the cargo. This is New York.

SPEAKER_05 54:04

You know what Millie Bobby Brown has to say. Oh, looks like uh looks like your mom just uh walked backwards, Jordan. Fuck.

SPEAKER_06 54:11

Badass! A dump truck. Whoa!

SPEAKER_01 54:15

I love that I get to cut that out just because you both blew out your mics.

SPEAKER_05 54:21

You gotta leave that in. Um anyway, uh the things do is it looks like your mom is walking backwards. Yeah, because of the beeping. Yes, you have the truck. The tradition a large truck would make when it backs up to alert those behind it.

SPEAKER_02 54:34

Yeah, and her fucking pussy is so old she comes dust and shit like that. I get it. I get it.

SPEAKER_05 54:44

I didn't say anything about your mother's beautiful nether regions. Your father would be pissed at me. We heard it all. Your dad would be angry at me.

SPEAKER_02 54:53

Um what the thieves do is they put the cargo into refrigerated vans and cruise neighborhoods selling milk at cheap price.

SPEAKER_06 55:01

Okay, that's awesome. That's like a Robin Hood. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 55:06

Do they play like a little song? Like a do-do-do. Steal milk.

SPEAKER_06 55:09

If anybody's listening to this, steal, go steal some milk.

SPEAKER_02 55:12

Steal milk, steal goods. We don't. Don't let companies hoard goods and sell it to you, steal it.

SPEAKER_03 55:20

Hipster guys running towards the like illicit milk milk truck.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Hey, pull up, and then like all these people, oh my god, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 55:28

If the purge was real bob container.

SPEAKER_02 55:31

Oh.

SPEAKER_06 55:32

If the purge was real, I'd be stealing a lot of milk.

SPEAKER_02 55:34

Who's the um who's the fucking guy that uh stone cold milk hoses?

SPEAKER_04 55:40

Uh it was a Goldberg?

SPEAKER_02 55:42

No, it was a bad guy. No, it's like, oh. Anyway, there's like a guy who drank milk all the time. And that was his thing? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 55:53

And then that sucks.

SPEAKER_02 55:55

No. No, okay. It was a bad guy. He was like a he was like a America, like first bad guy weirdo. And he dri uh he was like doing his bid on stage, and then Stone Cold, yeah, I think it may be Kurt Angle.

SPEAKER_00 56:07

He was very American.

SPEAKER_02 56:08

Yeah. And then Stone Cold was wont to like drive in with a beer truck, you know, and hose down guys. And in this particular one, he drives in in a cute little milk truck and then he pulls it up.

SPEAKER_06 56:18

Yeah, I do remember that. Yeah, that's cool.

SPEAKER_02 56:20

That's cool.

SPEAKER_06 56:21

Stone Cold is awesome.

SPEAKER_01 56:22

Stone Cold delivering delivering milk to underprivileged neighborhoods.

SPEAKER_05 56:27

It was Kurt Angle.

SPEAKER_06 56:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 56:30

I'm good at this.

SPEAKER_02 56:33

I'm good at remembering things, but the only the the details of them without the the right information. Yeah, I haven't seen it. Oh, it's such a good one. You gotta watch it. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_06 56:44

I know. I haven't seen it in its entirety, like the whole match.

SPEAKER_02 56:47

Oh no, I just watched the milk blast. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 56:51

I'd I'd be watching that type of stuff too.

SPEAKER_02 56:53

Enjoy little kids. And you just spike. Like a fountain into the sky. He shoots milk up, and all these underprivileged children are like, ah, chit. Yeah, they're running around.

SPEAKER_05 57:05

Dude, my grandma. Sweet. My grandma used to love WWE so much. She would like like we would get like the pay-per-view, and she would like gather all my cousins around and like make us. She'd be like, do it, do it, do it. You'd have to do a royal rumble, and whoever wins gets dinner. Oh, I always won, dude. You have a sad life. I was actually the most powerful cousin. Which is crazy. I believe that.

SPEAKER_06 57:29

Yeah, it's crazy, but I'm sadly not the most powerful. That sucks.

SPEAKER_05 57:33

And I'll admit it. It depends. Like, it in if you go out, like, because I've got like the 30 cousin. Like, if you think of cousins as like going away from the sun, you know, like different like you know, like levels to cousins, you've got like the main son cousins, like the immediate cousins. He's just tier ranking his cousin levels.

SPEAKER_06 57:52

In terms of like their power level quality or closeness.

SPEAKER_05 57:56

Like my mom's direct, you know, brother's kids. My mom's brother's kids. Those are direct cousins, right? But if you go into the third cousin's second cousins. They already have a ranking. They don't need son. Yeah, no, but I want you to think about it after that. I want you to start thinking about it. Like an orbit. Like an orbit. Like it's all or like an orbit. Alright. I'm starting to understand. Alright, can't beat those cousins. Those are bigger cousins. And smarter. See, I've started to like. All your first cousins are bigger than you? No, all my first cousins are weak. Every other cousin is strong. Once you go out, they get more powerful and smarter. Because they've had to live in the dark.

SPEAKER_06 58:41

Yeah, it's like baby. They're further away from the sun.

SPEAKER_02 58:45

On the higher gravity system, yes.

SPEAKER_06 58:49

Well, I don't even know my second or third cousin.

SPEAKER_02 58:51

Is those kept close are um like yeah, little scrawny weaklings, or are those closer are bigger and stronger?

SPEAKER_06 58:57

I have one first cousin who's very strong.

SPEAKER_02 59:01

Because they've bathed in the light of the center being there. I guess such as grandma. Are they military or are they just like No, they're not military.

SPEAKER_06 59:12

They are in I they just graduated PA school, actually. Oh, cool. Yeah. But also uh do powerlifting competitions. Hell yeah. So he's big. PA's that PL.

SPEAKER_01 59:25

I was gonna say the exact same thing.

SPEAKER_05 59:27

With DSLs. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 59:30

Well I'm not alling to that because that's my blood.

SPEAKER_02 59:35

You can fuck a cousin. You can fuck a cousin.

SPEAKER_05 59:37

You can, famously. Um What about Oedipus, but like cousin Oedipus, so it's like not that bad? It's kind of like, oh, really? I guess.

SPEAKER_02 59:45

And then they all poke their eyes out at the end.

SPEAKER_05 59:47

Yeah, no, they don't. They just spoiler. No, dude, cousin Oedipus is kind of just like, I'm not gonna fuck my cousin. And like it's like he gets drunk once.

SPEAKER_06 59:54

Cousin Oedipus is just Alabama.

SPEAKER_02 59:58

Roll tie, baby. Do you know that uh play from Neil Le Boot and it's like about a couple that's like broken up and they're like getting they're like getting back together their first night after seeing each other for a while, and then like an hour in, the twist is that they're like brother and sister.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:14

I don't know that one. I know about the one about the like the art installation, like it's like uh the like the girl is dating the guy, and at the end it's like uh an art installation about how she never like loved him.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:26

Oh. I don't that's I gotta read that one.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:28

That's yeah, it's very in the same vein.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:30

Yeah, he's a he's a funny dude. Anyway, Millie Stachinsky re uh continues by saying, You think I don't know about this? There was one time when I spent $200 on a bunch of meat nicely packaged, even got some crab legs thrown in.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:44

I had to feed my Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:48

I had to feed my kids, and yes, I know there was a meat truck hijacked in Baltimore. I heard it on the news, but I got a lot of meat at a very good price.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:56

As you should, Millie.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:57

Don't ever feel bad for getting cheap crab legs. She doesn't know, too, that the meat came from that truck. She's got a guilty conscience. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:05

Did she buy it off of a person on the street? Yeah, she's got a lot of.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:07

Yeah, she well, she uh she got it. She doesn't say exactly how. She's not gonna give up her. Yeah, she's got that OCD.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:14

She's got the OCD where she sees something on the news and she's like, I did that.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:19

That's just regul well, that's just regular OCD.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:22

I have that, so I can I can attest. Yeah, we'll get it treated, dude, and come back.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:28

I'm trying. Get it treated, brother! Not enough medications in the world for this benogin.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:35

Um, you know that Stone Cold has the best refrigerated delivery truck for distributing.

unknown 1:01:44

For milk truck?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:45

For milk or beer. Yeah, black market meat. And meat. Yeah, he's just gonna be it's stone cold back there.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:52

What? Oh, because it's cold in the name.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:56

Yeah. But I also think he would do I think he's a man of the people. He is a man of the people.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:04

Stone Cold is kind of like the Captain America of professional wrestling. Like he's always held his ideals close by. Even people who performatively say, like, I'm pro-American, and they like spout all these like weird ideals and stuff, like eugenics and fascism and all this stuff. He's like, You don't know what the spirit of America is, brother. You know?

SPEAKER_06 1:02:26

Yeah. He's pro-America in like a good way. Yeah. He believes in the an America that's better.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:33

There's like a focus group for And then he dates a uh he's married to a European. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:38

What the heck is that about it?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:41

His wife is British, that's why his name is Stone Cold. That's right, that's right, I forgot. Because she's like, your tea's gonna get stone cold, darling.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:49

What?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:49

What?

SPEAKER_05 1:02:50

Well, they don't even they don't even refrigerate milk in England. That's the thing. I'm so glad we won the war.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:00

They don't refrigerate their eggs, their w their butter, or their eggs. Oh, disgusting. What was warm milk?

SPEAKER_05 1:03:07

Warm eggs, brother. You're taking me to Sainsbury, brother.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:11

Oh chicken was all broad. The only time And Warn beer, they have warm beer there too! Disgusting. They're backwards people. The only time I become pro-America is when we're talking about the British. And I I defy any British to come here and fight me hand to hand. So fucking televisor.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:29

Alright, dude, we gotta bounce the next movie.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:33

You're fading fast?

SPEAKER_06 1:03:35

Um What's a good movie about the British being losers? The Patriot. The Patriot.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:43

Um, right, that's where it is. Sorry. The James Bond movie where like the bad guys win.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:49

So before we before we move on from Casablanca, uh excuse me. Before we move on from Casablanca, we had Sarah Rose Kaplan on. It was such an honor, so funny. Um we'll get her back on soon. Um, but Sarah was constantly giving us interesting historical facts um that we were just continually impressed by. Um so we have a new segment right now. It's called No Cap with Sarah Rose Kaplan. Uh Sarah Rose Kaplan sent this fun and interesting historical fact over for today. The first known person to introduce tofu to the Americas was Benjamin Franklin. Did you know that?

SPEAKER_06 1:04:27

Is that real? That's not true.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:28

In 1770, he wrote a letter back home from London in which he described his encounter with a Chinese cheese made from soybeans.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:38

Well, how about that? No. Ben Franklin. That horny son of a bitch. That son of a bitch. Found tofu in a whorehouse.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:46

Yeah, you think you think that Ben Franklin wasn't like reading Marco Polo's journals and being like, I'm gonna get me some of that.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:55

Yeah, eating up tofu. Yeah, he went to the part of Marco Polo's journals where he talks about the massage parlors where they jerk you off at the end. He had like a list of them.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:04

Yeah. And he's like, I gotta try out every one of those. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:07

All over the world he had every massage parlor that ended in a J-O.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:11

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Franklin International fuck freak.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:15

Dude, how come he doesn't have an airport named after him? That guy would be a fucking He's got the $100 bill. Oh, that's way better. You're absolutely right, actually. Yeah. I want an airport, dude. I want an airport so bad. They they gave the guy that the the CIA director that like wanted to kill Canon Dulles a uh an airport and like their own. Did he he wanted to kill Canon? Oh, he did. I'm pretty sure like that's like the uh the CIA director that was kind of like uh you know suspected of organizing the whole thing, and they like they made the airport named after him just to be like, gotcha. In Dallas? Yeah. Or no. It is Dallas. Dallas is yeah. Where is Dallas Airport? Isn't it in Dallas? I think it's Dallas.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:59

Dallas is Dallas. Dallas Fort Worth.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:00

Oh, whatever. Dallas is somewhere. Oh, Washington. I'm so sorry. It's in Washington, D.C. Okay. So it's more. Even better. Yeah. All right, Judy.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:11

You said we need to move on. We need to get to Mrs. Doubtfire. Mrs. Doubtfire, I didn't want to do too much here, but I did go to R slash Divorced Dads.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:19

That sounds good.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:21

I've got some posts for you. This one is called Leaving Before I Even Get a Chance to Make a Post. A mod removed my comment just now because I use the word shit. I can't believe it. Half of us are trying to wrap our heads around why our marriages are ending, and we're still getting nagging messages about what language is appropriate for us to be talking about.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:43

Which is not. It's almost as if the mods are saying, it's not what you said, it's how you say it.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:49

If the mod is his ex-wife, I Well, if it that's what it's like here, goodbye.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:57

I'm not gonna go through a divorce and still deal with nagging mods that talk down to me the same way that my ex-wife.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:04

Yes, yes, yes. This guy is awesome. Give him mail this guy a couple Cialises.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:12

No, mail this guy a fucking motorcycle and a fucking mixtape, dude. This guy is like on a journey of self-discovery. David Getta, dude. I love this guy. Yeah. David Getta? Yeah, just imagine him listening though. David Getta. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:27

I think divorce, you know, is a disease. Let's talk about that.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:31

Okay, let's look at this. Dude, I feel like I'm back in the sock hop. What the hell do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:36

Because like divorce is a mentality, you know? Like my grandparents, I no, I'm not I'm not demonizing divorce. I'm just saying that like divorce is something that you have to like focus your mind on. If you really want truly out of something, you have to say, like, I'm going to divorce myself from it, right? Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:54

The concept of divorce, not like marriage divorce specifically.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:57

Yes, but marriage divorce is obviously like a syndrome of the divorce mentality. And marriage syndrome, or and so you can get divorced in a good way. You can make the decision. You can say, I want a clean cut from this and it's gonna happen. Yeah. Or you can get divorced in an unhealthy way and you can become this fucking dude, right? And then you get on divorced dad subreddit, and they make one thing that you don't like, and then you have the same reaction to it, and then you get divorced from divorced dad at subreddit. Yeah. And then you join like a bowling league, and then fucking Tony says something that you don't like, and you get a fight, and then you're divorced from your local bowling league. Right. Until you divorce yourself from everything in your fucking life, and then you divorce yourself from life.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:39

Here's the thing I think that's what people do. Yeah. I know. I know it's a journey, though.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:45

It's part of the journey. I hope it's a journey, but I think for a lot of people it's a downfall. Divorce is a downfall.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:50

Becoming the divorced dad archetype. It's part of the journey of life. Yeah. And without it, we wouldn't have Kinder, we wouldn't have Cedher, all these amazing bands.

SPEAKER_05 1:09:05

It's like no play if there was if it was not for this specific type of divorce. So lips of an angel would have never been rich. It wouldn't have been rich.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:14

I don't want to live in a world.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:16

It's the disaster of a world. So it's like you gotta take a dip into being a divorce dad. You gotta get on the sh the jean shorts, you gotta get the new balances. Hell, get an affliction t-shirt for all I care. And then eventually you meet a nice woman down in Cabo, who's also a divorcee. No, you don't get mad at well, not a big one.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:37

A divorce diva and a divorced dude.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:39

Yes, they meet, and then they're like, you know what, this is good enough. We're gonna die in 20 years, we're not gonna be able to remember anything in ten. So let's just pop a couple pills and get busy.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:50

You know, my parents are um my mother, my sister is a half-sister because my mother is a divorcee who met my dad, and uh they had had a crush on each other in like high school, and then they met back up when they were 30, and my dad was like, Yeah, I still love you.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:06

What a beautiful story.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:08

And she's like, It's really good to hear your voice.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:19

Come on.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:20

Uh we'll continue down this divorce dad track. This guy says Rick Grimes is my king. He says that's the name, that's his username?

SPEAKER_06 1:10:28

That's his username. That's a divorce dad. You didn't even have to tell me that this is the subject, and I can tell that was a divorce dad.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:34

Uh he says, How do I get my daughter to talk to me after my divorce? My daughter was so hurt by my divorce, she hasn't talked to me in nine months. She's 26. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:46

Well, that's interesting. I guess it depends on what the what the situation of the divorce is. Like, was it your fault? Did you do something naughty? Or be like, give it space, you gotta let it breathe.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:57

Or like, what are 26-year-old women like, dude? They like uh Phoebe Bridges.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:01

You're gonna have to learn that as a divorced dad anyway.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:04

You'll have to learn that, and then you're gonna take her to a Phoebe Bridgers concert, sold out, MSG, and you're gonna have the time of your life, you're gonna cry, she's gonna cry. You both have emotional motion sickness. Yeah, black out drunk with your daughter at the Phoebe Bridgers concert.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:20

I think your first question though, Shrimps, really like investigating the situation is probably the smartest, saying, like, well, did you do something naughty? Because somebody says, uh, you know, maybe unless something crazy happened, she just needs to give her time to mature. And he says, I did nothing but ask my wife for a divorce. My daughter came at me in a fit of rage, screaming at me, right up in my face, calling me a loser and a drug addict, weed. I called her the C-word, which was probably a mistake. Um, but she was in my face, yelling at her father, and a 60-year-old man. I feel I would have done the same to any 26-year-old woman who was in my face. Might be bad, but she blocked me and will not respond. So he called her a cunt.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:00

That's not that she sounds like she was being a bitch. Oh, come on.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:05

I said it before. He should start dating her friend, so that way that when she hangs out with her friend, she can hang out with her dad. That is one thing that he's fingers. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:15

I I'm not gonna I'm not gonna sit there and have you, this 60-year-old man calling his daughter a cunt and be like, he's cool. Yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:24

He's cool if he dates his daughter's friend.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:26

That's cool.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:26

Yeah, and he bought that ticket to the what was it?

SPEAKER_05 1:12:29

Was it Maggie Rogers or Phoebe Bridges? Phoebe Bridges. Oh, you did what? Cheated on Bo Burn. No, no, no, I'm saying like what concert were we talking about? It was Phoebe Bridges. Oh, I it could be Maggie Rogers too. You could do like a double ticket. You could do a double ticket, dude. Get her boy Genius ticket. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:46

Here's the thing. I'm spreading my like real wide when I say that. Yeah. Good. Good. I my parents got divorced when I was 21 years old, and I didn't yell at either of them about that. So give the guy a chance. No! Smoking a little weed. He maybe called his daughter a bad word, but it sounds like she was in a fit of rage.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:11

It's he says she's in a fit of rage. Yeah. She's fucking dealing with their divorce. Grow up, you're 26. I do agree. Grow up, you're 26.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:22

I would love to hear anyone else's side of the story other than this guy's. I also feel like that is his pivotal details that are missing.

SPEAKER_02 1:13:29

That seems like I think that he's a fucking loser smoking weed every day, not taking care of his uh responsibilities, watching The Walking Dead.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:38

He also asks for the divorce, maybe his wife is nagging him. No, I think he watches The Walking Dead too. Alright.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:45

I think when he has like when he brought up the drugs thing and then said weed specified weed, it makes me think it's more than weed. You know what I mean? I don't think so. I think he's on other drugs.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:53

Can can guys have hobbies anymore? Like watching The Walking Dead smoking weed all day, every day.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:02

I appreciate the other perspective, but I I simply cannot sit by and hear you uh puff up this loser dad. We don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:12

We know his name is Rick Grimes is a king. We know he's a loser dad.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:16

He's cool.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:16

No.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:18

No, he could not. He couldn't. There are plenty of dudes that we know that we're friends with that could have a similar use for him.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:25

Um, and he wouldn't be on Reddit, divorced dads asking how do I get my daughter to start talking to me if he was cool.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:30

He loves his daughter. Yeah. Looking for advice he doesn't know. He doesn't know how to use the internet. Who else is gonna ask?

SPEAKER_02 1:14:37

His daughter.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:38

Where the hell is the actor that plays Rick Grimes?

SPEAKER_02 1:14:41

I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:42

Get him on the case.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:44

That should be we should send Rick Grimes to his house and be like, hey man, you really messed up with your daughter. That would be a good thing. I lost my son, Carl.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:56

Carl. I lost Carl.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:59

Um really sucked. Last post from Divorced Dad is from Mother's Milk 69, which says when I use indigestion on my opponent, do I steal his base attack or his terrain buff as well? My opponent played a new combo, and I had a steal type on the board, so that card's attack is buffed. On my turn, if I use indigestion to steal that card's attack, would I only steal the base attack or the attack plus the new condo buff?

SPEAKER_05 1:15:25

Are you not telling us about the shit post tag that's on there, Jordan?

SPEAKER_06 1:15:28

This is on the divorced dads I've read it?

SPEAKER_05 1:15:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:30

Okay, this is the type of shit that starts to piss me off.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:32

Why?

SPEAKER_06 1:15:33

Because you have genuine, real, heartfelt messages from people like Rick Grimes is king. And then you get these trolls making fun of people that are going through it.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:46

No, there is a there's a there's a game called Divorce Dads. It's like a card trading card game. Is that real? Yeah, it's like Magic the Gathering, but it's called Divorce Dads.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:57

So who was on the wrong sub? This guy or Richard?

SPEAKER_01 1:16:00

Probably this guy, because all the other questions are about like if I slap my wife, is there a way to apologize to it?

SPEAKER_05 1:16:06

Nobody said that. The Astoria subreddit, every once in a while you'll get someone that asks a question that's like doesn't make any sense. It's for Astoria Oregon. And it's for Astoria Oregon. And people are very funny about it.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:16

I would jump on that so fast and really throw the whole book at him.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:21

But they're doing, you know, they're being funny about it. Because it's a thing. I wouldn't be banned.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:26

No, no, be nice. I'd say do your research. You'd be banned. Look, I have been banned from the Astoria. I've read it multiple times. I have to keep making new accounts. Oh my god. That's why he's boxed anyone who's mean to me at the bar.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:38

He started his own. Uh Jude, would you mind moving the cable just so it's like anchored by the book?

SPEAKER_06 1:16:44

This one?

SPEAKER_02 1:16:45

Yeah. No, the other the other way. Uh, so it's like on the other side of the book. There we go.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:56

This is getting way worse. Here's what I do. And I got me banned when the story is separated. You really did. If someone is mean to me while I'm bartending, I'm not gonna disclose which bar I work at. For legal reasons. I take a picture of their credit card and I post it along with what they said and did to me. Obviously, it is separated. And I say, have at it, everybody. Spend away. And I got banned. For what?

SPEAKER_01 1:17:25

For what?

SPEAKER_06 1:17:26

For being a rob- I'm a Robin Hood of Circles.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:28

You are kind of a Robin Hood of Circus, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:30

That's absolutely that's definitely a crime. I just don't know what it's called.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:33

It's called identity theft.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:36

Crime is, you know, I don't think that crime is morality. Yeah, what are you? A fucking cop? I don't know yet. Thank you. I'm still trying to figure it out.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:44

I'm still trying to figure this stuff out.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:48

Well, we're all trying to figure out our lives. That guy is trying to figure out his divorce. Yeah. Just rode by on a loud motorcycle. You know what? He's on the room. He's probably had he's probably got hinder in the ear pods. And he'll figure it out one day. He'll meet a nice woman down in Margaritaville.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:10

Yeah, dude, that's where the divorced dads probably flock to like a fucking fly trap, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:14

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:16

Like a fly trap, baby.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:17

Um last thing about doubt fire is uh when we're talking about like how the doubt fire. Divorced dads. Oh divorced dads. Um, is that you know you could you can do a lot of things with a divorce. You can turn your life around, you can put on an outfit, you can, you know, ingratiate yourself in your kid's life, you can, you know, then reveal that you are the divorced dad underneath that latex suit. You know, you can do a lot of things. Um I would never do that.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:43

I would keep the latex really tight.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:46

We did mention in like kind of the building of the new doubt fire suit, at one point a psychic bean is mentioned. Like, yeah, how does it function? And then a psychic bean is thrown out. And I just wanted you guys to question, because it's not really, we never talk about it more, but say like, oh yeah, like a psychic bean. And it felt like kind of the three seashells, the three clamshells in uh demolition man. Yeah. What is the psychic bean and how does it work? Oh boy.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:17

This is in our version of Mr. Doubtfire, I guess. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:21

Okay, so beans famously, there's a lot of them, I guess. Uh, so I'm interested in knowing, like, is it the same size as its brothers and sisters? You know what I mean? Or is it bigger and it does it like have like a pulse?

SPEAKER_02 1:19:35

Like Right.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:37

You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 1:19:38

I don't know what you mean.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:40

Does it come in a pod?

SPEAKER_02 1:19:41

Do you have to beans come in pods sometimes? Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:45

I think. But like what where is it grow? The psychic bean.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:52

I would say possibly in a lab in some sort of like petry dish is where you grow each psychic bean. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:00

Is there like an occult element or is it like actual, like, you know, science, or is a mixture of the two?

SPEAKER_02 1:20:07

I think because we're it's brought up in like how to pass on the doubtfire like suit or like legacy or whatever. And so in my mind, it's like it is, it's true. It's like technology and genetics mixed into one thing, you know. And so it like we they call it a bean, but it's actually just like a small flesh pot or something that has like a bunch of like nerve endings or something in it. You put it in your ear, yeah. You like put it in your ear, you swallow it, or you like push it under your eyelid.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:35

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it kind of like grows and fits in perfectly, and then it kind of starts to like alter your DNA like a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:42

Yeah, and so you maybe you change physically actually into the being the doubt fire or whatever.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:48

Yes, it's like the Baldur's Gate brain worms. Yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:54

Make you in a lithid.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:55

Yeah, I just beans the better. I just can't get the image of Harvey Feirerstein like in the control room being like, You put the bean under your ear. It's gonna make you more powerful, baby.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:07

Um, put the bean in your ear.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:10

Put the bean in your ear and listen to what it has to say.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:14

Alright, so finally we talked about Avatar with Jersey. Um Shrimps, what are your thoughts on the Avatar series?

SPEAKER_06 1:21:24

Um, well, I've only seen the first one. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:27

Yep.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:27

Um You know, it it was fine. I I really don't have that much of an opinion on Trick Told. I think it's overrated, but I also don't know if it's overrated because I feel like most people think it's bad. So it's a adequately rated.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:42

So, um, you know, just by numbers, like most people don't think it's bad. Most people think it's good. It's one of the most popular movies ever made, it makes more money than any movie ever all the time. True. Most people who like, you know, nerds and dweebs and fucking uh, you know, movie pieces of shit like uh you possibly me think it's bad, generally.

SPEAKER_06 1:22:07

We are movie pieces of shit.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:08

Yeah, we're movie pieces of shit. I did, Jude, I watched Avatar Three on the plane. Okay. Because I've been on planes a bunch of times.

SPEAKER_06 1:22:16

Yeah, I need to like fall screen with no 3D glasses.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:19

Honestly, slay. Um, it's good. Avatar three is fun. It's like the same as Avatar 2, which everybody says, but it's like a great time and it looks great. It's really long, right? It's real long.

SPEAKER_06 1:22:31

I gotta give him another chance.

SPEAKER_05 1:22:33

Would you um I mean we could do a quick segment here, just something I brought up. It's uh Deviant Art Spider Avatar, and I could describe to you what I'm seeing.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:42

Yeah, Spider is a uh human child born of like born like on the planet, Pandora, and he's a white kid with dreads, like shock white dreads. Yeah. And he really, I learned in the third movie, just really says things like, You buttholes, get over here. He's a child?

SPEAKER_05 1:23:02

He started as a child, he's like now an adult, but he still talks like in the James Cameron camp for like 15 years. Yeah. And they just grew his dreads out.

SPEAKER_06 1:23:11

He just keeps working on these damn movies.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:13

Yeah, and they make him talk like fucking, like, I don't even know, like uh Jeff Spicoli from Bast Times at Ridgemont High.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:21

It's so strange. Yeah. Because it's like, where did you learn that language from?

SPEAKER_05 1:23:27

Like it's like it's like a more like PG version of Beavis and Butthead. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:23:31

He doesn't even have like earth, or he has earth insults. He doesn't have Navi insults. No. No. That's interesting. Yeah. The insults, the way that you think the insults to talk like a three ninja. Oh, three ninjas.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:44

Yeah. That those are good. Alright, we gotta do an episode. Describe this Deviant art to us, too.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:48

Okay, so this is uh spider. Um it's very crudely drawn. It looks like it's MS Paint. Um he's holding a gem, and it's in Spanish, uh, the caption that says Akiri le encontra esta hermosa yema, que me le encontré bajo el mar, which means um Akiri um loves this beautiful gem that I found at the bottom of the sea. Uh that's what I'm looking at. And the next one, he's a navi and he's covered in sperm.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:25

What looks like human sperm? Because you can see the tails. Oh, they're big.

SPEAKER_06 1:24:31

Earth sperm.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:32

Um, this does kind of lead into one of the segments that I was uh I have for this, which is like, what's the coolest navi-branded merch that you can find? Especially like bootleg, because we kind of talked about that. Like there's a huge Navi kind of thing.

SPEAKER_05 1:24:47

Like the like the Bart Simpson, like Iraq war shirt. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:24:51

It's gotta be either a butt plug with the tail.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:56

Oh, that's good.

SPEAKER_06 1:24:57

Or a flashlight.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:59

That is very good. Um I mostly looked into t-shirts, and so what I found is there's like the body print t-shirt of a Navi, so you can make your torso look like Navi. That's cool as hell. Just cool.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:12

Kind of like like a cheetah print, but it's like the Navi like blue spike.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:17

That's cool. What about a bong? What about a big bong?

SPEAKER_02 1:25:20

Big Navi bong would be. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:22

Kind of shaped like a plant from from Pandora.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:24

It's or yeah, it's shaped like the fucking um psychic dread that they have. Yes. Yeah. And you just suck on it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:32

Oh, yeah. Something like sexual where you have to like make them touch.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:36

Yes, yes, yes. Um there was also one of the characters, and I think it's like Kiri or something, and she was doing the hand symbol, and it just said six, seven on it, which was pretty. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:53

She did like this.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:55

I could use a minions crossover. That would be good.

SPEAKER_06 1:26:00

Yeah, that would be cool. How big it's an untapped market.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:02

Because one of the things is that we we we know that the Navi are like rather large in scale. And then we realized that wait, the minions are very dominion. They're small.

SPEAKER_05 1:26:15

They are. Minion is right now.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:17

So that would be a fun fun team up.

SPEAKER_06 1:26:21

Yes. Small something smaller than normal and something larger than normal. Yes. Being friends. Yes. And getting up to who knows what. Because the minions, aren't they trying to destroy the world or something? With Gru? Yeah, well, they're helping Gru.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:36

They're attracted to the most evil person on the planet at any time, usually, I believe, is the lore.

SPEAKER_05 1:26:43

That's the lore? It's good lore. Okay, well, I don't want to get too deep. Well, people were pointing out there were like the the era between like 1935 and 1945. Where were the minions? They leave that out of the movie.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:55

They do.

SPEAKER_06 1:26:56

Oh, the minion lore goes back?

SPEAKER_05 1:26:58

Yeah, they goes back to like way back.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:00

I think the first minions movie, they do like a you know, cold open where it's like the minions through history, and it's like they're helping Dracula, and they're like, you know, teaming up with Attila the Hunt.

SPEAKER_06 1:27:10

How could you create this lore and not stop yourself at some point to be like, how do we explain this? They don't talk about it.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:19

I think they're like frozen in a glacier or something during World War II.

SPEAKER_06 1:27:23

Okay, so it is, but they're trying to get out.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:29

You see them vibrating in death.

SPEAKER_06 1:27:31

They know where they're trying to go.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:36

The calling rings in their ear.

SPEAKER_06 1:27:39

They're screaming inside the ice. Many of the myths of the Yeti and the Sasquatch are from hearing the scream to the bunker before Hitler shoots himself, like right before the bumper.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:56

It's just the classic, like, they're running and then the

SPEAKER_02 1:28:02

The door bangs open as you hear the gunshot noise, and they're all just frozen, and then after three seconds, one of their jaws just goes.

SPEAKER_06 1:28:11

You see a single tear come out of Bob's single eye. Oh my god. All their goggles start to fog up.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:21

Like one guy at the Nuremberg trial just has to like swat them away with like a fucking baseball bat.

SPEAKER_06 1:28:27

Yeah, because they're all trying to get the Himmler. Or whoever else is at the Nuremberg trial. They're all trying to get in because it still has easily level in the world inside the Nuremberg trip. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:38

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06 1:28:39

What about a minions like heist breakout movie where they're trying to break out all the Nazis from Nuremberg? Yeah. They don't want that movie to be made. They don't. For good reason. But it's basically, I mean, Nuremberg was not very good, the movie.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:56

Oh, I see.

SPEAKER_06 1:28:56

Like not the trial. Trial? I'm all for it. Hey blossom. I support the Nuremberg trial. I want to go on record saying I support the trial.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:04

Good, good, good.

SPEAKER_06 1:29:06

The movie I don't support as much. And I didn't think it was very good. And I think there is space for a new Nuremberg movie that could potentially be filled by the minions.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:29:19

Beetle Beatle.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:20

It'll bring a lot of people to, you know, a knowledge and a light that they probably didn't have before, and a lot of people that probably need that. Yeah, wake up.

SPEAKER_06 1:29:28

These are not all fun and games. They're bad people. Bing dong didle.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:32

I'm gonna ask you two couple hypotheticals before we close this out. Could Bane beat Anavi?

SPEAKER_06 1:29:39

Could Bane beat Anavi? Beat. Oh, beat.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:44

Um, like in a physic one-on-one in a physical fight.

SPEAKER_06 1:29:48

I think he would rip that one in half.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:51

Pandora's secret song, ripe for the taking, if one knows what the secret side is.

SPEAKER_06 1:29:58

Where is it happening? In the in three and a half feet of water?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:02

Yeah, it's like any true battle. Yeah, three and three and a half feet of water?

SPEAKER_06 1:30:08

Oh, toddlers would hate that. There was this uh It's the most dangerous animal in the world. Yeah, the animals fighting show, and every battle is in three and a half feet of water, so they could accommodate sharks. Yeah. So it'd be like a shark versus a lion. I think the Nobby would win.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:22

Yeah, bluefin tuna versus moose.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:25

Bluefin tuna was not on the show. Oh yeah. Bluefin tuna is losing most fight.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:28

Or like a kid. That's crazy to say. You think? Bluefish tuna's like one of the fastest, biggest th fish in the.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:35

They're fast, but like what if they're just slam too besides being fast?

SPEAKER_02 1:30:38

Slam their bodies. You don't want to get in a fight with a bluefin tuna.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:41

I'll fight a bluefin. Alright. I'll die.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:43

Alright, we'll make it happen.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:45

Um, I do think Bane would absolutely destroy it. I think Bane could take like five Navi.

SPEAKER_05 1:30:51

But the Navi can swim. I don't even think I saw Bane swim once. He didn't need to. No. No, I think Bane would lose.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:00

I think that at some point one of the Navi was would be like, I was born on Pandora. You nearly adapted adopted it.

SPEAKER_06 1:31:08

Okay, so it's on Pandora.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:10

Yes, yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_06 1:31:11

If it's a cage match, I think Bane is winning. If it is in do they have weapons?

SPEAKER_02 1:31:18

Um, you know, sure. They would have their natural weapons.

SPEAKER_05 1:31:21

Is Bane like a terrorist? What is his thing? Bane. He's essentially a terrorist, yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:27

Well, he's a hyper intelligent, um, hyper strong when he uses venom. Um and he so he's like super tactical and super strong.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:36

He's cool. Okay. I like to cause agents of chaos.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:41

Um I th I think I would give it to Bane versus just one singular Navi.

SPEAKER_05 1:31:45

I'm giving it to the Navi. Because the Navi would like use its swimming power to like go up and like crow grab his cross. Because we're in three and a half feet of water. You brought it up.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:56

We didn't establish it. Well you did. You established it.

SPEAKER_06 1:32:00

You're right.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:02

Um, if you could avatar into anything, what would it be?

SPEAKER_06 1:32:09

What? What does that mean?

SPEAKER_02 1:32:12

In avatar, they avatar into Navi.

SPEAKER_06 1:32:15

I forgot that that was the basic premise of the game.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:18

Yeah. If you it doesn't have to be it could be a person, it could be an animal, it could be an experience. Mark Zuckerberg.

SPEAKER_05 1:32:24

100%. That would be wild. I would expect that. You can grab the wheel of that one for a little bit and just. No, I'm not writing the ship, no way. I'm just having fun.

SPEAKER_06 1:32:38

I'll make it great. There is, but you have to consider the fact that you don't replace Mark Zuckerberg. So there's two Zuckerbergs running around, and you might at some point have to prove that you're the real one.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:51

I I'm saying that you're just putting yourself into the body of the thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:32:54

You like like uh thing still exists.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:57

Right? We're not we're not actually creating an avatar. That person's body is the your avatar. So like piloting. Yes, it's uh being John Malkovich situation.

SPEAKER_05 1:33:06

Okay, I I got it. That's right. Everybody would pick that one. Or or Elon Musk.

SPEAKER_02 1:33:12

Mine was close. It was Tim Allen. I was gonna be Tim Allen, and then I would just shoot myself in the fucking face.

SPEAKER_06 1:33:19

Do you die if the avatar dies?

SPEAKER_02 1:33:20

No, I just get instantly transported back into my.

SPEAKER_06 1:33:23

So you just are trying to kill Tim Allen. And that's the person you would choose to kill.

SPEAKER_02 1:33:27

No, I want Tim Allen to kill himself on an airplane.

SPEAKER_06 1:33:31

I don't know. That's a good question. Because there's like so much stuff. It's like, do you want to do something good? Do you want to do something personal? Do you want to do something naughty? I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:33:42

Be a little dog and like poop on the floor?

SPEAKER_05 1:33:45

Yeah, poop and pee. Yeah. I feel like Mark Zuckerberg, you can do all that. You can poop and pee on the floor, you could go like to a restaurant and act a fool. You could go water skiing, you could create a a terrible new thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:33:59

How long are we in the body?

SPEAKER_02 1:34:01

Until you die.

SPEAKER_06 1:34:03

Oh, until you choose to exit what the So if you were like, say, like an NFL player. And you were playing an NFL as then, would you feel the effects of CTE yourself?

SPEAKER_02 1:34:22

Oh. I mean, what a question. I don't know. We would have to test it out. We don't know the limits of the technology.

SPEAKER_05 1:34:33

I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 1:34:34

I don't feel like it would feel as good if you didn't like earn it yourself. The CTE? Just well yeah. But just I've I've earned my CTE. I paid my dues. But I don't think it would feel as good to be in the NFL if you didn't like go on the journey of getting there.

SPEAKER_05 1:34:48

Well, yeah, and also you wouldn't like have the skills. You would just be piloting the body. It would be terrible on every everything would be great until practice camp and the games. Yeah, and everybody would find out. Everybody goes, what the fuck is wrong with you, dude? You were so good, now you can't even block.

SPEAKER_02 1:35:03

I feel like it would be like that first scene of Jake Sully entering that Navi body where he he stumbles for a moment on his newfound legs, but then he runs. Dude, he runs. You feel you don't know the plays, you don't know the playbook, you haven't done the practice, but then you realize that this body knows exactly what to do.

SPEAKER_06 1:35:27

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:35:27

And then you tear your ACL. And then you tear your ACL.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:30

And then you go, I'm out. And then you're gonna go.

SPEAKER_06 1:35:33

I got five million guaranteed. And then you feel yourself as the player, and then it gets blamed on CPU.

SPEAKER_02 1:35:39

You write, yeah, you write a will that's like give all my money to shrimp beef.

SPEAKER_06 1:35:43

Yes. Thank you, dude. Thank you. Study my brain. Um yeah, I there is a lot of consequences. I do think being someone like a Zuckerberger is someone that's like ridiculously rich. It's a you don't have like there's no consequence to you being bad at your job because they're already bad at their job.

SPEAKER_05 1:36:02

Of course. Yeah, that's what I'm I'm not playing a game or anything. You know what I mean? I could just be like, I want um, I want a hamburger app. Yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:10

I'd say the same thing about Tim Allen, you know?

SPEAKER_06 1:36:14

I would still want to be someone that's like hot though, you know.

SPEAKER_05 1:36:18

Oh, like the new Pope? That would be crazy. He's whatever he says.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:24

And then you just canadize an e-saint.

SPEAKER_06 1:36:27

Yeah, the e-saint, the gamers ain't. Do you get their memories?

SPEAKER_01 1:36:30

Uh, yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:32

Oh, I don't want that. Oh, okay. Especially not if it's Marcus Uckerberg being a nerd in fucking college.

SPEAKER_06 1:36:37

All the children's blood he drank.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:39

Yeah, what a loser. What a loser nerd ass in college.

SPEAKER_06 1:36:42

You can't throw that on me like that. Maybe stone cold Steve Austin. What? Although he's not up much these days, but he lives a peaceful life.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:50

He does live a peaceful life.

SPEAKER_06 1:36:52

Um kicking ass is peaceful, brother.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:54

Well, Shrimps, thank you so much for wrapping up these movies with us. Oh, you're welcome. Um, I don't know if you guys caught on to this, but I'm really, you know, I'm I'm I'm in the midst of changing my life right now.

SPEAKER_05 1:37:06

Uh, you do you you're giving off an energy that I've only gotten from like very specific uncles.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:12

Thank you, thank you. Yeah, I uh I'm getting our old home cleared out, packed up, and I'm gonna be moving it down to Nevada, but in the meantime, I'm gonna be turning it into kind of a psychedelic psychic freak space.

SPEAKER_00 1:37:26

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:26

Um where I'm a psychic bean space. A psychic bean space where I will be developing the psychic bean um for the future.

SPEAKER_05 1:37:33

You're kind of like a divorce dad in a way, but that is kind of going away from divorce, which is like kind of a good energy.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:41

I'm divorcing myself from a lot of things that I truly held on to over the course of the life. So that does mean that um I'm having uh Gorillo's pickles right now, um, but I'm gonna be mostly like California sober uh for the next six months. So I'm weird.

SPEAKER_00 1:37:56

Really?

SPEAKER_02 1:37:57

It's just gonna be, yeah, it's gonna be uh weed and psychedelics. Uh and so I'm gonna try to, and I hope that this one keeps me honest. You'll see my journey in audio and uh in this space over the next uh like you know, four to six months. Uh I hope, yeah, it keeps me accountable, and I hope that you guys see a true change into bringing this into like a psychedelic freakish territory.

SPEAKER_06 1:38:20

Yeah, you get to see the disintegration of Jordan's point. In real time.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:25

In real time.

SPEAKER_02 1:38:26

Yeah, because we are actually mostly right now recording these like the day before they come out. And that's beautiful. Yeah, it's beautiful.

SPEAKER_05 1:38:33

You're kind of avataring into a new version of yourself. It is true.

SPEAKER_02 1:38:37

Into a divorced dad, which will then meet my new love who is uh Nevada wife. Uh let's see how she changes too by the time I get down there.

SPEAKER_05 1:38:47

Dude, yeah, she's probably gonna be like quite different as well. Yeah. She'll be like Nevada Sober. She's gonna be an F1 driver.

SPEAKER_02 1:38:53

F1 driver, Nevada Sober.

SPEAKER_05 1:38:55

Um, we are going to be releasing mini episodes where her and I will uh be gonna be doing those neck exercises for the F1 movie that like look we're so uncomfortable to watch. Like, I was like, I didn't know what those were. What were they? Well, they have a strong neck. What were they? I guess to make their neck strong, but I'm like, why do they need resistance?

SPEAKER_02 1:39:13

Oh, for the G Force and stuff.

SPEAKER_05 1:39:15

Okay, but I was just like, what the fuck? The G's, man. I gotta go to the gym and start doing that as like a flex. Oh yeah. Like, I'm doing this because you know I'm a I'm an F1 driver.

SPEAKER_06 1:39:24

Yeah, you can lie.

SPEAKER_05 1:39:25

You can lie about that.