Q&A: You Asked, I Spiraled

we’re almost 6 months in (!!) and close to episode 20, so it felt like the perfect time for a q&a.

i’m answering everything from la highs & lows, dating, and the acting industry… to friendships, going back to people you shouldn’t, doing things alone, and the thoughts that live in my head way too often.

a mix of a chaotic, honest, and a little vulnerable “get to know me.”

thanks for being here :)

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Editing by Julie Bishop

Cover Artwork by Angelina Richeson

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hinge for state. He did not murder me and I did not end up in the lake. So it was good. But was showing to her that my location was in the middle of a body of water, in the middle of the lake. So she was texting me like, Are you alive? I just see that your body or your location is in the middle of a water. Please respond. SOS and all her coworkers were like around it all day until I responded and tracking it. Welcome to Casually Spiraling. With me, Julie Bishop, just a tall girl in this world trying to make sense of life, dating, money, relationships, identity, culture, you know, all the things. I've learned that my thoughts don't always land with the people around me, so I'm here to break it all down, talk it out, probably overshare, and maybe find some who don't think I'm totally crazy after all.

Intro

SPEAKER_00 1:03

Hi, hi, hi, beautiful people. Welcome back to another episode of Casually Spiraling. Thank you so much for being here. I still every week am so grateful if you're listening and following along. So I appreciate it so much. How are y'all doing? How are y'all feeling? We're getting into April now. I actually can't believe we're already in April of the year. It feels like it was just Christmas. But you know, not complaining, not complaining. It's gonna be a summer before we know it. And yeah, how are y'all feeling? How are y'all doing? Hopefully good. Um, we are on episode 19, which is crazy. I think in about a month will be six months of casually spiraling, which, like, yeah, who who would have thought we'd still be here? But we are. So we're on episode 19. So I thought it was about time we do a little QA. We're almost on episode 20. So I thought, you know, we're getting close. We're getting close to six months, we're getting close to that 20 episode. Um, so yeah, I asked you guys to ask me anything, send in whatever questions you may have, um, do a little QA, get to know me a little bit better, and yeah, I'll give you the best answers I got for your questions. So yeah, let's just get right into it. Um, I posted on Instagram um the stories. So if you're not following along, I do a lot of posts on there asking for you guys stories, takes, questions, whatever it may be. So follow the Instagram, DM me, respond to the stories. And if I don't get through all of them today, um, because I have a lot here, then I'll do another episode of part two at some point, and every once in a while just go back and get to all the questions. So yeah, keep on sending, even though this episode is coming out today. Keep on sending um for future episodes. Okay, uh, let's see what you

Living in LA

SPEAKER_00 2:53

guys gave me. What is the best and worst thing about living in LA? Okay, the best thing, so many. There's so many options of things to do, whatever kind of things you may be into. I feel like everyone knows this. This is why people pay to live here. But if you're a beach person, so many beaches, if you're a hiking person, a mountain person, so many mountains, if you're a city person, so much city um experiences, and there's just it's a big city, right? So there's so many different areas that have each their own different vibe. So I feel like you're not just stuck to one thing if you live here. You can find your place. Each like area can be so different in how you feel and how you feel when you're living there. So I feel like it's very open for almost everyone finding a place that they love here. Um, and yeah, I just I feel like I've been the most busy since I moved here in the best way possible. I've met friends the fastest than I ever have because there's just so many people here for so many different reasons. And yeah, I mean, of course, the weather. I love being able to walk to like like I said before, coffee places or walk be in walkable areas sometimes. Um, I love the beach. I love hiking. I love there's so much in driving distance. There's national parks around. It's easy to get to other states and other areas. There's so many places in California I want to explore, like in driving distance. Um, about to go to Santa Barbara, as we know, and like even so much more up and down the west coast. There's so much in driving distance, so much to explore, so many different vibes here where you can find your place. And yeah, I just I love it. So many cool people, um, good food, all the things, yeah. So many good things, and the worst thing, um, probably being far away from my family and friends. Majority of them live on the east coast, so definitely the worst thing is being far away from from my people. Um that would be the worst thing for sure. I mean, of course, everyone knows about traffic, but like I'm not gonna say that's the worst thing for me because that's not gonna determine my life. Um, okay, next

Women, Being Alone, & Pickup Lines

SPEAKER_00 5:23

question. How should women help other women? Good question. Um, obviously, women supporting women, I think there's a few things. I think, especially maybe when people are younger, certain situations, a woman always goes to blame the other woman when I think that shouldn't be the first the first thought and the first reaction. Um, and then also I guess being a woman, women are typically in the minority of certain situations. So just remember that we can all win and supporting each other because I feel like sometimes women might feel like, oh, there's only room for one of us, so we all have to be in competition all the time because only one can win. Um, so really getting rid of that and recognizing there's room for all of us and we can all win, and we don't always have to be in competition with each other. Um, I think I think that's a big one. Um what is the best thing you've done by yourself? I mean, moved across the country, moved a few different times. Um, but I've had I've had help like people physically helping me for that, I guess. So I don't know if that counts as by myself. I mean, I did the moving, I moved on my own. Um but like activities. I mean, I loved going to my beach volleyball rec leagues. Um what else have I started doing by myself? I mean, we'll see. I'm about to do my solo trip, so maybe that'll be my new answer. But overall, definitely moving. Moving to new places, seeing new places, starting to explore, explore new places all on my own without having known anyone in those cities that I've moved to. Okay. Next question. What is your best pickup line? Oh, I don't know if I have one. Hey, are you single? Um, I'm really bad at approaching. I need to practice it more. Um, so I don't even know if I have one on my own. I think, oh, but my friend, shout out Emily. She gave ideas that I need to try. One is just um if you're like out in a bar scenario, she said just like go around and start high-fiving anyone you pass. If you're like moving along with your friends, and then like high-five the person you think is cute, and then if you get like a good vibe, you can stop and talk and have that conversation and initiate that conversation, or if it's like not interested, then just act like you're going around high-fiving other people, so it's not it wasn't even a like a big deal or a move at all. Um, that's one, and then literally just walking up to them. This was the other one she gave. So these are all credit to her. Literally just walking up to someone with your phone on the keypad and just holding your phone out in the keypad and not even saying anything at all, and then see where it goes from there. Um, I haven't tried these yet. And yeah, I don't even think I um maybe go birds if they're wearing eagle's gear. Um, yeah, I need I need to practice approaching more because I'm shit at it. Just shit. I try to just make eye contact, and that's my pickup line, and just keep making eye contact to give them permission to then approach. You know what I mean? That's that's my move. Um, okay,

Acting Industry

SPEAKER_00 9:01

if you could change one thing about the acting business, what would it be? Oh my god, just one thing, just one. Um there could be a few. Um, probably to start out, the fact that 2% or less of actors actually make their living off acting. It would be nice. It'd be nice if that percentage wasn't so low. And it could be higher. We would we would love that. We would love that so much. Um, what else? I know you said just one thing. I'm not gonna name just one thing. Um, maybe like the feeling like sometimes the impossible catch 22 standards, like you're not gonna make your money off acting, but in order to succeed or get anywhere, you have to put so much money into it. Via coaches, via headshots, via self-tape setup, via whatever it may be. It feels like it's something that is impossible to make money at, and but you have to put so much money into it to succeed, hence why less than 2% people can live off of it. Um, and then also just like needing to be available all the time for taking all these risks, but again, you need to have a job and stability in order to support yourself. So just there's so much contradiction. I guess all the contradictions that feel sometimes impossible and that they're fighting against each other. And then probably one other thing that comes to mind is the lack of control. Um you can be you can just all you can control is yourself and the work you put in, the work you do, and you could be like so talented and great for the role, but they already cast someone with the same hair color as you, so you don't know that's why you're not getting role, but that's why. Or you know what? You're taller than the main your romance interest, so sorry, like just certain things you don't have control over, um, that you don't even know maybe the reason you're not getting a role. It's just all the unknown. You could be so good and they loved your um performance, but just lack of control of other factors that play into it. And maybe it being less about who you know and more about your talent a little bit, that would be nice. A little bit less of that would be great, but you asked for just one thing, and I sure did not just name one thing, but you know, there's a there's a few things there that come to mind. Um, and then going off of that, the next question was what is your dream job? Either TV show, movie, or music video. Um, it's always been TV show. I would love TV show or movie, but I think it's always been TV show from the beginning, from when I was a wee little kid, I was obsessed with my TV shows. I was obsessed with seeing the dynamic that the casts build because you ha you're spending so much more time together and over a long period of time that it felt like like summer camp or like a school year where you have these uh long few months that you're all like spending so much time together. And I love just like watching the behind the scenes of onsets and stuff, and just an ensemble of people becoming friends and having so much fun, um, and then getting to do that if you have multiple seasons like over and over again, and like having more time period to grow a character and develop it versus a movie, it's just like three months in and out, um, which also there's pros to, but from the beginning, from when I was a kid, I just was obsessed with TV shows and would watch them over and over and over again, and I just wanted that dynamic and that experience. So that is still the dream job, and it's a little more stability for a little bit at least, you know um that for a certain period of time you'll have work. Um and yeah, so that's always helpful. What's

Dating & Friendships

SPEAKER_00 13:05

your ideal first date? I'm really pretty simple. I don't even know, but I feel like the best dates that I've had for first dates is where there's an activity and then like a sit-down after. So for example, one of my dates was like a morning hike, and then after we got brunch. So like the hike, the fact that there was an activity and other things going on, I feel like it was so like took the pressure off so much. So then everything just felt so natural. The conversation was flowing and easy, and it didn't feel like a sit-down interview. It felt way more natural and fun, and we had something to do, and but we were still getting to it was still an activity where we still could talk and get to know one each other instead of being in like a movie or something. You can't talk, so you don't know the person. But like being on a hike, yeah, and he brought his dog along, and I feel like it just made it so easy and so natural. And then afterwards, we got brunch or breakfast, so then we could sit down more and really just focus on each other and talking. Um, but it started off with that activity to I think loosen things up and take the pressure off and ease us into it and be more natural. So maybe not that exact date, but that was a nice one, but like just that combination in some way of having like a light activity and then like opportunity to actually chat more and or like focus on each other more. Um, but funny story about that. So that was a hinge first date. So I've never met this guy before. I didn't think anything of it, but the night before I was on FaceTime with my friend Meg, and she's like, Oh, what are you doing tomorrow? Whatever. I'm like, uh, I'm going on this date. You know, it's one of those where at first you don't really want to go, but you go anyway, and then it ends up being good. But I was like, Oh, I have this date tomorrow morning. She's like, What? Why don't you tell me? I'm like, oh, you know, it's just a hinge date. Another one, it was in a time where I was I was going on a lot of first dates. So talking about just any other first hinge date was really nothing. Um, but she's like, oh, what are you doing? I'm like, oh, we're going on a hike. She's like, Shuly, you can't go on a hike with a man you've never met before. That's a little dangerous. I'm like, oh yeah, I guess I didn't really, uh, I felt fine. Um, but she's like, okay, I'm going to be tracking your location tomorrow and making sure you're safe. I'm like, okay, cool, perfect. So our hike was like around a lake or by a lake. So she's literally at work the next morning. She's telling me she her coworkers are hovered around her, hovered around her phone, because they just see my like circle location in the middle of a body of water. And just because we were hiking right next to the lake, I guess you know the dot was just off, but was showing to her that my location was in the middle of a body of water, in the middle of the lake. So she was texting me like, Are you alive? I just see that your body or your location is in the middle of a water. Please respond. SOS and all her coworkers were like around it all day until I responded and tracking it. Um, so yeah, that was funny, but he did not murder me and I did not end up in the lake. So it was good. That was ideal. Okay, next question. What do you do when all your friends are busy or in relationships? Ooh, okay, okay. Um, okay, to start off, I think there is an if you're single, I think there is an importance to having single friends. Um, so if all of your friends are in relationships, I encourage you to seek out a few new friends who are single. I think it's important to have those people for during that time so you can be in the same space as someone. Um, but if you're looking for a more immediate answer, you don't you don't have that time right now to make new friends and you just want an immediate answer, I would say um, I mean, there's a lot I've talked about. You can join a club, you can join a rec league, something that puts you around other people. So your social cup gets filled. Immerse yourself in a situation that you're immediately around other people, um, and then opens you up to new people, and then you can be social in that way if you're missing like some social aspects because all your friends are in relationships or busy. Um, I'm kind of in this, not exactly in this place right now, but a lot of my friends are in relationships at the moment. But I have my two single friends here in LA, and it's just nice to have that balance and to have them or a few single friends here in LA, but a lot of my friends that actually um don't live in LA, my like best friends prior, they're all in relationships, but a lot of my friends actually here are single, so it's nice to have them because I can talk to them about certain things currently that my other friends can't relate to at the moment, and I can just vent to them and complain to them, and we know we want to go out and we know we want to be social and this and that because we are single, versus like maybe my friends who are in relationships are more prone to staying in more. They're not gonna relate so much when I'm venting them about the dating struggles, they're out of it and this and that. So, first off, I think it is important if you're single to you have to also have a few single friends at least for those times when your relationship friends are with their partners or want to stay in. Um, so it's good to have those to go to. Um, but then yeah, joining a club or some situation where it puts you around other people to fill your social club. And then, I mean, I've talked about this before, but you can also do some things on your own. I wouldn't want anyone, if there's something you really want to do or see or go do, I wouldn't want you to miss out on it just because none of your friends are available to go to. It's like, oh, I want to, it's as small as going to see a movie or going to the beach one day or trying this new food place. You're like, oh, I really want to do it. Can anyone go? And if no one can, because they're all with their partners are busy, are you just gonna stay home and not do that thing you want to do? You know what I mean? Like, you could reschedule it for a different day, but if you can't, then like, why would you stay home and not do it when if it's something you want to do, then you can just go and do it on your own. And then another thing, maybe if you feel like all your friends are busier in relationships at this time, make sure, like maybe take that time to focus on your own passions and goals and put a lot more into those and then see what comes from that. Maybe that'll put you in situations where you're meeting new people and being social, where it'll take you down an avenue of growth. Um, but yeah, that's what I got. Those are some solutions, hopefully. Um, for that question. Okay, next question. How do you stop thinking about someone you know isn't right for you? Ooh, I mean, no contact, unfollow, block, mute. Like, there's just no way to stop thinking about someone in a day of social media if you're following them and they're popping up on your feed all the time, or if you're like noticing if they're watching your stories or liking your stuff, or this or that, that's just gonna no matter how much you want to tell yourself that that's not affecting you, like that's just gonna force it to always be on your mind. So like get them out of sight, out of mind. No, no messaging, no calls, no social media, no seeing them anywhere. Out of sight, out of mind, and then just start focusing on what you're doing and your goal, your goals, and keeping yourself busy, and then before you know it, you're so busy with whatever you're doing, and you're not seeing them pop up anywhere in your life. So then who are they? What was their name? I don't know, can't remember, can't remember not important. You got out of that, out of those rose-colored glasses, they are off, and you're doing your own thing, and you're experiencing who actually is in front of you out of sight, out of mind. Period. Next question Have you ever gone back to someone you knew you shouldn't? Damn. Damn, damn, damn. Um maybe, yeah. Um, haven't we all? Please um don't expose me right now. Um, yeah, yeah, I have. And was it uh the right thing? Never, never, never, never, never, never, never. Um but I think we all have at some point or another, and now I have much more. More of a clearer mind. So I don't let that happen as much these days. But you know, I feel like your gut is always right. So you need to listen to that more. You know what I mean? You need to listen to that more and trust it. We love to be in our emotions and our feelings and think, oh, we can make things work even though everything else is telling you it's not right. Um, yeah, so ignore that. Um, feelings aren't facts. Um listen to your gut. And breakups usually happen for a reason. There are reasons behind a breakup and getting back together to make yourself feel better. Those reasons are probably gonna come back up. They're just gonna come back up, and you're just gonna elongate the hurt and the the ability to move on. So, yes, I have gone back to someone that I knew I shouldn't and definitely regret it. Well, live with no regrets. It's whatever at this point. But I'm like, damn, I kind of feel like I kind of like lost my power when I did that. And um, but I was emotional and stuff happens, but thankfully, thankfully we realize why did I do why? Well, thankfully we can look back and be like, what the fuck was I thinking? Um, yeah, no, never again. Never again. Breakups happen for a reason, or even if it's not like a full-on breakup, whatever it may be, trust your gut, know how you should be treated, and don't fall back on that.

Random

SPEAKER_00 23:38

What's your current random obsession? Ooh, randoms. Okay, what are some random things I've been loving lately? Hmm. Okay. Trader Joe's has this um like three different kinds of hummus in one thing, I guess three different layers, and one of them's like a spicy one, one's the original, and one's like a different flavor. I've been loving that. Um, that's in my fridge right now. Oh, yeah. I have been watching a lot of reality TV. Um, I probably should stop, maybe. Not really, but there are other non-reality TV shows I want to watch, but I keep putting them off in order to watch the drama of reality TV. Cause uh by the time I get in bed at night, I just want to turn my brain off. Some other shows that are so great, I feel like require more brain power, and I feel like by the time of my day I actually get around to watching TV, it's like gonna be just for a little bit before I fall asleep. So my brain just doesn't want to think whatsoever and just wants to shut off. So that's kind of why I go to that a lot. Um, but it's okay. Guilty pleasure, love it, no shame, nothing wrong with it. And then, oh, okay, yeah. You know what else? Bedazzling has been a new thing. Actually, someone needs to take away my kit from me, and I must be stopped. I must be stopped. So I got a bedazzling kit back when I hosted Galantine's um in February, so I wanted us to have an activity, so I got us a bedazzling kit and told everyone to bring an item to bedazzle, and that's where it started. I bedazzled a pepper spray, and everyone else was bedazzling, and it was just so soothing and peaceful. It's like back in the day when you like had coloring books and one color, and like you can l have something on in the background that you're listening to as you do it, and yeah, I just it was just we just had a great time, and then just a few nights ago at the Hannah Montana anniversary party, the bedazzling kit made a reappearance, and I got into some more bedazzling, and then I've had the kit with me in the past two nights. I've been bedazzling and I need to stop. I have keys bedazzled, I have a makeup brush bedazzled, part of my phone case is bedazzled, and it's it's it's gonna be too much. I need to stop, but it's just so soothing and I like it. I was thinking about but after watching the Ham on Tyana special, I'm like, I should bedazzle my podcast mic. Um, so that would be the next thing that I would do. Um, because yeah, I bedazzled everything else already, so that's a current random obsession for sure. Okay, what something you do that you know isn't good for you, but you still do it. Um, I mean, kind of like I was just saying, watching TV and scrolling before bed. We're told over and over again, you're not supposed to do that, but I still do it. I still do it. I feel like I don't really scroll any other time of the day. That's like the only time I have when I come down and lay in bed at night. Um, I've been trying to scroll less. I actually haven't too much recently, but um definitely that and watching TV before bed. I have two books on my nightstand right now, both half started, and I just I can't, I can't get myself to read. It's so hard for me. It's so hard. That's just not what I want to do again. Like I was saying, my brain just wants to turn off because it's tired from the day. I don't want to read. I just I try have to force myself to make time for it. The only time like I actually get any reading done, I feel I feel like is on the beach. Um, besides that, the books are just sitting on my nights down staring at me. They're staring at me, wanting me to read them, and anytime I try and like I would have to actually write it into my schedule, and even then I'm like so not motivated to read. I just I just don't like it. I don't like it at all. Alright, next one. What's something you've been avoiding? Ooh. Ooh, ooh, ooh. Opening up my bank account app and my credit card apps. I'm in a constant avoiding of open those. I sometimes I'll like open it and like cover the top of the screen that I know the money is gonna show. Um, yeah, I hate looking at that. So I avoid opening those apps as much as possible. I only go on there when necessary. And sometimes I like shut one eye and like try to avoid actually looking at the screen. Um, I avoid those all the time. Um besides that, what else? Oh, like probably decorating nicely, um, like my space or the apartment. Me and my roommates talked about doing more with our space, and it just hasn't happened. I'm bad at interior design. I see Inspo, I see other people do it. I'm like, that how'd you how'd you put all those things together and it looks so good? Like, I wish I had that brain. My brain is not good at interior design as much as I want to. So um, yeah, probably decorating spaces. Um I wish, I wish, I wish I was good at it. I wish I did it more. Um yeah, is there anything else personally I've been avoiding? I don't really know. I don't think so. Um, okay, next question. What's a thought you have way too often? I'm hungry. What am I gonna eat next? What am I eating today? Um, in reality, yeah. I'm always planning around my food. It's important. Um, but besides that, probably when is my career and life all gonna fall into place? Mainly my career. It's like you can work so hard at something for so many years, and you just it's hard to not have that recurring thought of like, okay, when is this all gonna work out? When is this gonna get to its peak? When is it gonna fall into place? When am I gonna have my I told you so moment? I can't wait for it, it's gonna happen. Um, and I dream about that day. But yeah, so I guess it's just always my mind when when is this gonna win work out for me? Um and get to the the points that I want to be at. Um, okay, let's see. What's something you wish you cared less about? Um the for real for an answer, I guess like in the sense of appearance, my stomach. I talked about this in the body image episode. Like, why are we so uh why do we put so much energy into thinking about like our stomach or this and that? Like that's just so stupid. So probably in that sense, um, that's like annoying, you know, when you go through those periods of, you know, as I talked about before, you go through confident periods and not confident periods. So definitely wish like that just wasn't a care at all. And then yeah, I guess when people ask, like, what do you do or ask about your career, and I feel the need to explain myself. Um, so I don't feel embarrassed. I wish I didn't care whatsoever about that or how people's first impressions of that are, um, and just own it. Not that I don't, but sometimes I feel the need to overexplain myself. Like, yeah, I work at a restaurant, but I'm pursuing this and pursuing that. And no, I haven't worked with anyone famous, but that doesn't mean I'm not succeeding in other ways and this or that. Um, sometimes I just overexplained because I care too much about the reaction. Okay. Next question. Are you more in a going out or staying in phase? Ooh, okay. I love going out, and I love like a little maybe midweek activity. Maybe if it's not even a going out big thing, but like an activity or a get together and then one on the weekend. Um, I don't like freak out if I don't have plans on a weekend. Like there's weekends, like I had my sister's bachelor art weekends. We were obviously out all weekend and a lot of drinking and this and that. So the next weekend I stayed in the whole weekend, and I was not frazzled by that whatsoever. Like, I just go with the flow, but definitely still in a going out phase. I want to be out there, I want to have plans, I want to be doing activities and yeah, having fun, um, enjoying the nights. Um, yeah, and especially we got summer coming up, and I'm single, of course, so I still like to go out and socialize and all that. What kind of energy are you trying to have this summer? Ooh, speaking of summer, let's see. I'm in a making money energy, uh, spending as much time with my friends, being outside, feeling so happy and so confident and on top of the world, feeling for the summer. As summer should be, the vibes should be high, electric, and yeah, just feeling super happy and confident in all the aspects of what I'm doing and having fun and traveling and yeah, but that's how I want all seasons to be, but you know, especially summer, especially summer has got that an extra spark in there, I feel like. Um, okay, next question: what's your current era? Ooh, what is my current era? I think I'm in a I'm taking it one step at a time era, one week at a time era. Um, especially with my birthday coming up, and you know, every year you're getting older, and then you start thinking about a whole big picture of life and where you're at, and this and that. Some kind of era of trying to not freak out about that and just take it one week at a time and make the most of that one week, and then the next week will come, and then you'll focus on that next week instead of like freaking out about a larger picture of things. I'm in my era of one step at a time, there's no need to rush. It's like learning to love or falling in the, you know, Jordan Sparks. I'm in my Jordan Sparks one step at a time, era. Okay, what's next? Um, what's something small that means a lot to you in relationships? Mmm. I love an I miss you text or uh I'm thinking of you little text randomly throughout the day. Um, which is crazy because I know I speak a lot about how actions versus words and that guys love to talk, but um, and they love to tell you the world, but if they don't put things into action, then it doesn't mean anything. So it's kind of ironic because I think my love language is words of affirmation. Like I love a little reminder, I love to know I'm being thought of and just being told that. And I love like on a birthday or something, um, or in some scenario where you're getting a gift, something that means way more to me than a gift itself is if there's a card and that person like wrote in the card whatever how they're feeling or something, like that means more to me than anything. But yeah, so I do love words of affirmation. But of course, this is in relationships where you trust them and you already know like that their actions and their words mean it. Um, this isn't like a beginning of a relationship thing. I feel like this is when you're like already in a relationship. Um But I mean, yeah, that was the question. What means do you a lot in a relationship? So yeah, just those little things. Um, don't have to be talking all day, of course. I like having our own lives, but just a little quick reminder here and there, like, hey, I am still thinking of you, or this or that. Um, okay, what do we have next? What's your most irrational fear? You know what? Getting on escalators and getting off escalators. Um, yeah. You ever see um what's that movie? Final Destination? In one of them, someone gets eaten up by an escalator, and I don't know why. Like getting on an escalator, like you should witness me in an airport. People can just walk on there, no hands. In that scenario, it cannot be a no hands girl. I have to have at least one of my hands free to hold on to the side railing thing. I can't step onto an escalator, especially if it's going down. And I hesitate a lot. I always make sure, like I try and make sure like people aren't directly behind me when I'm getting on an escalator because every single time I will hesitate, but I can't just step on those things. I hesitate and I have to have one hand free to hang on to the railing. So I usually have to put my I have to step aside, put my phone away because my suitcase is in my other hand, and I have to have one hand free, and I don't know why I getting on an off-escalators is my most irrational fear. Um, yeah, you should you should see me in an airport. It's probably funny. Um, okay, next one. Sweet or salty. I'm a sweet all day. All day uh person. Um I have a huge sweet tooth. Um usually if there's something where like a normal adult would be eating it and they're like, this is too sweet, I'm like, that's either not sweet enough or that is perfect, and I can keep eating that forever. Um versus other people are like, oh, I can only have one or two bites of it. It's too rich. Um in my head, I'm like, why are you being such a Debbie Downer? Like embrace your inner child and like get over yourself. Um, because sweets are the best. And yeah, and I always want a sweet treat every day. Okay. The next question um would you rather binge a show or have like weekly episodes? Huh. Okay, this is this is tough because oh, sorry, I'm yawning. Okay, this is tough because um I've been loving recently like certain shows having like an episode, one episode a week, and then I listen to some podcasts that like break it down or they talk about it. Um, so that's been a nice like filler in the week. So I like having that combo. And there's definitely certain shows where this worked well, like over the summer, the summer I turned pretty season three, or tell me lies season three this year. Like those shows came out weekly, and like I was fiending once you watch the episode, I was like, Oh my god, I can't wait till next week. I was counting down the days till the next week. I was re-re-watching that episode all week long until I got to the new episode and like was thinking about it a lot. So, in a sense, that's exciting. In a sense, obviously, you wish you had um the episodes, but I liked it. I did like it because it was exciting again. It brought me back to how things used to be and being left on a cliffhanger, and like I feel like it made me more emotionally invested in the show and in the characters, and like wanting to find out what happens. Um and yeah, so I liked it. It brought back some excitement. Um, and I think then there's like more community when it's weekly, because then people are waiting for that day, and then it's like the next day after it comes out, everyone's talking about it and breaking it down. So I did like that. There's like certain shows where I feel like that's not necessary for, and it's like, come on, just give us all the episodes. Like, what are you doing? But um, I did, I did enjoy, and then it made it, it made it last longer instead of just watching it all in one night. I like had the season over a whole summer, and I'm like, thankfully, because I loved it, so it made it last longer.

More Dating, Friendships, & Self

SPEAKER_00 40:31

Okay, next question Have you ever ghosted someone? Um, sure, like someone who we either only went on like one date with, maybe back in the day again when I was going on a lot of first dates, or someone who we maybe never even went on a date with, like just had my number and I wasn't interested, um, or someone maybe I gave my number to to get the conversation ended, but was never interested in the first place. Um so definitely in that sense, but never anything serious, or even when I was going on a lot of first dates, I was trying to not ghost. Um so I did have in my notes app like a set thing written up, and the note was like called no ghosting. And whenever I went on a first date with someone and like wasn't interested, I would just send copy paste, maybe fill in a few details that are specific to them and send it. Um I may still have that in my notes app. I'll have to look. But yeah, so I try not to, and I definitely was making an effort to not to, and I haven't in a very long time. Um but yeah, nothing in a serious situation where there would be more than one date and not in a long time. What's a version of yourself you miss? Aww, sad. Um sometimes, I mean, I don't feel it right now, but I feel like every once in a while, if I'm in like a sad period or something, I'm not carrying myself around as goofy as at some points I may have. And I just I do miss that freedom sometimes. Um yeah, maybe I'm in a little bit of that right now, but yeah, that if that goofy side is not always there in how I'm carrying myself and that freedom in my body and in myself, then I definitely I definitely go through phases where I miss that. Miss that part of me. Next question. Do you think friends can outgrow each other? 100%, yes. It is it's I mean, you know a friendship is real when you've been friends for a very long time because it's tough to not outgrow friends sometimes as you get older. Uh yeah, this happens all the time and it's totally normal. Um, people just grow to be different and maybe not meant for each other anymore. Like, definitely have had some friendship breaks ups in my time. Um so yeah, totally normal. They suck. This worst feeling. Um, but yes, 100%. 100%. Have you ever had a summer fling? Ooh. Oh, I did in high school a little thing back back in the day. I think it was my my first summer fling, I'd say. Um in high school, summer, I think after sophomore year, before junior year, maybe, and it wasn't even really a flang, but it was like my first real crush, and I didn't have my driver's license yet, so I couldn't drive myself to his house. So when I could, my one sister was home from college. I would try and have her drive me, so I didn't have to have my parents drive me. Um, but then at some point, my parents did have to drive me, and I remember my mom. Said she had to introduce herself if she's gonna drop me off at this guy's house. So one time she walked up to the door with me and introduced herself to him and maybe his mom, I forget, and I was so embarrassed. Um, but yeah, I feel but young Julie had a little a little summer hangout with uh with a crush, but that was that, I think. But yeah, I would try and get my sisters to drive me there instead back before I had medicine. Um, and then besides that, I mean, I don't know. I feel like definitely when you travel on trips in the summer too, like you meet someone on a trip, and it's like you have your little fling for however long you're there, you know. Um, okay. Next question: something you wish you could tell your younger self. Ooh. I do think about this sometimes. Um, when I was younger, I feel like I was in my head so much, and I would beat myself up about like being socially awkward and not just being myself. Like in my head, if I was in social situations, I would like get shy and quiet. But in my head, I would beat myself up. I'd be like, just be yourself, just be yourself. Because when I was around people I was comfortable with, I'm like, oh my god, they love me. I'm normal, funny, fun, whatever, social. But when I got around like new people, I would like be so shy and like not have anything to say. But in my head, I was beating myself up. Like, why can't you just be yourself? I don't get it. I beat myself up about that all the time. Like, just be yourself, be yourself. What are you doing? Say something, just say anything. Um, so I'd probably go back and tell her to relax, to not beat herself up so much about that, because one day you are gonna be able to do that, and it's gonna be awesome, and you're gonna find your confidence, and you're gonna be able to be yourself in all sorts of situations like that, and in new situations, and it is gonna happen one day because I think back then when I was younger, I just couldn't understand and I beat myself up so much about it. So just reassuring her that you will get there, and it's all gonna work out, and you will be able to be yourself, and you'll figure out who that is, and you'll find your confidence in that. Um, so it's not gonna be like that forever. So give yourself a little bit of a break. It's gonna be okay. Don't beat yourself up so much about it.

Conclusion

SPEAKER_00 46:29

And yeah, I feel like that that seems like a good one to end on for today. Um, thank you so much for sending in questions. I have more here um to get through, so there definitely will be a part two. Um, and keep sending them in, keep listening, keep following along, and I appreciate you all so much. So we will see you next week. Happy, happy Thursday, happy day. Follow, like, subscribe, and send in your questions. Okay, bye for now.