Don't Be Rushable: Someone Else's Emergency Is Not Yours | Nervous System Regulation

When you rush, you're not just moving faster — you're broadcasting a frequency of panic, and your nervous system pays for it. In this week's edition of The Weekly Recharge, Renae shares the story of her last day in Mexico: a travel companion spiraling into full chaos mode over airport timing, a can of tuna eaten like a feral cat on a balcony in paradise, and how refusing to rush led to a free private transport upgrade, an empty security line, and perfect timing every step of the way.

Drawing on her years as a firefighter paramedic, Renae breaks down the fundamental rule that made her job possible — someone else's emergency is not my emergency — and why that same nervous system regulation skill applies to your inbox, your group texts, your deadlines, and your family drama.

In this episode:

• What being "unrushable" actually means (hint: it's not being unavailable)
• How staying regulated when others panic changes outcomes — for you AND them
• The paramedic training rule that applies to everyday life
• This week's practice: one small thing to stop absorbing urgency that isn't yours

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Transcript

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When you rush, you're not just moving faster. You're broadcasting a frequency of panic. And your nervous system pays for it. The more you worry, the more resistance that you create. But when you stay regulated, things flow. And here's the kicker. Your calm is contagious. Regulating your own nervous system doesn't just change your day, it changes everyone else's around you. Welcome to the weekly recharge. I'm Renee, your host. If you gandered over here from the House of Rebels, welcome. Feel free to subscribe. This is my weekly newsletter where I've made it into a video, podcast, whatever the fuck you want to call it, so people have easier access to it. Then you can subscribe, you can get a little bit more nuggets sometimes in your email. Sometimes people just don't fucking care about emails. But here we are. So if you want to subscribe, feel free to. Otherwise, I'm gonna hop right in. I saw an Instagram post the other day about being difficult to rush, and I feel like it hit a bit different. And go ahead and check it out. I don't know which side I'm gonna put it on. There it is. But here's the thing: it's not about disappearing or not being there for the ones that you love. It's about staying so grounded in your own timeline that other people's panic doesn't become yours. Most of us think that being unrushable means being unavailable or purposefully difficult. But that's not it at all. Being unrushable means you're present, you're there. You're responsive, but you're not permeable to someone else's urgency. You don't absorb their panic like it's yours to carry. I learned this in Mexico on the last day with a business group that I went with. I found out that I had the same flight as someone else in the group. She was spiraling about getting to the airport, convinced that she needed to switch her transportation, texting the group in a full-blown chaos mode. I felt that pull too, that instinct to match her energy to panic as well. But instead, I sat on the balcony with a can of tuna like a feral cat on my last date in paradise. See, someone had graciously brought back a couple of cans of tuna earlier in the trip, and I decided I'm keeping my pre-planned $40 shared transport trip, and I'm going to savor this moment, looking out to paradise. When 740 rolled around, I checked out, headed downstairs, and there was my flight partner, along with a few others and the transport company. It turned out someone had actually booked an extra large private suburban for 730, and they never showed up. So they offered it to us. Private transport, 45 minutes early at no extra cost, which, by the way, was $190. So thank you to whoever didn't show up. Because I didn't scramble, the better option found me. Then it kept going. Security was completely dead, almost suspiciously dead. And then we breezed right through. My friend turned to me and said, We almost could have stopped at Starbucks. And then I literally looked to my right and said, Well, there's your Starbucks. We got our coffee, browsed a little shop full of Mexican trinkets, and by the time we looked back, security was slammed. It was perfect timing every single step of the way. We walked down one hallway through a set of doors, and literally there was our gate, right there. And she turned to me and said, I guess we didn't have to rush. Nope, we didn't. And here's where my paramedic brain kicks in. We were trained on one fundamental rule. Someone else's emergency is not my emergency. If I absorbed every patient's panic, I couldn't do my job. I couldn't think clearly, act efficiently, or actually help anyone. Staying calm under pressure wasn't optional. It was the skill that made everything else possible. That training didn't stay in the ambulance. It's nervous system regulation. And it applies to your inbox, your group texts, your deadlines, your family drama, all of it. See, when you rush, you're not just moving faster. You're broadcasting a frequency of panic, and your nervous system pays for it. The more you worry, the more resistance that you create. But when you stay regulated, things flow. And here's the kicker your calm is contagious. My friend didn't just make her flight, she relaxed. She saw with her own eyes that the urgency was never required. By the end of it, she told me, I need to travel with you more often. That's the ripple effect. Regulating your own nervous system doesn't just change your day, it changes everyone else's around you. So this week's practice is gonna be one small thing. This week, catch one moment when someone else's urgency tries to become yours. A frantic text, a tone in a meeting, a deadline that isn't actually yours to carry. Pause. Name it. That's their nervous system talking, not mine. And then I want you to check your own timeline. Did anything actually change? Usually no. And then I want you to stay your own pace. Don't speed up to match their panic. Notice what happens in your body, in the outcome, and then in them too. And if you're feeling extra fancy, write it down somewhere. Put it in your phone notes, speak it into your AI, or go old fashioned, maybe write it down in a notebook, but keep a record of it so that you come back to that moment that you held your ground and see how the rest of the day transpired afterwards for your proof. And then this week on Hustle Rebels Podcast, in case you'd missed it, we actually had a double feature. So if this week's newsletter resonated, the episode I'm about to talk about will definitely deep dive into that. I sat down with Suzanne Duchard-McFarlane, an integrative clinician with over 30 years of experience in speech pathology and craniosacral therapy, and we got into why burnout isn't just mental, it's physiological, and why your body eventually forces you to slow down and why pushing through isn't resilience. Also, why babies literally co-regulate through your nervous system. So, moms, this one's gonna be for you. So if you're dealing with chronic stress, postpartum overwhelm, or nervous system dysregulation, the conversation I had with Suzanne will definitely change how you think about healing. Suzanne also has a free download for new moms navigating postpartum hormones, new family dynamics, and going back to work. So you're gonna be able to grab it through her links in the show notes when you click on that episode. And then the second episode is with Erica Ando and Michelle Ann Miller, What If Good Enough Raised Your Standards, which is where I'm joined by the co-founders of Interval Paper and the creators of The Good Enough Guide, which is a pocket-sized guided journal for anyone that is trying to untangle themselves from the hustle culture. The sneaky force whispering, you're not thin enough or smart enough or successful enough, and why the antidote isn't lowering your standards. It's embracing good enough, paradoxically elevating them. They're also hosting an online summer retreat, July through September, where they're going to be exploring joy, enoughness, and time. So you can visit Erica and Michelle at intervalpaper.com to explore the Good Enough Guide and their summer retreat. They also have a very special listener offer for Hustle Rebel listeners, and you can check out their episode, grab the offer, and add the code to their summer retreat checkout. But don't sit on the code because it expires on July 18th. You can watch both of these episodes on YouTube and you can also listen to them on your favorite platforms. As I said earlier, you can feel free to subscribe, or you can have all of these links easily accessible in your email, but they're also going to be in the show notes as well. So until next week, take your time out there. Everything always ends up working out. See you next week.