Dance Battle Gone Wrong

“Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of Unscripted After 40, where we celebrate the moments that remind us we are not as young as our playlists suggest. If you’ve ever injured yourself trying to prove a point… this episode was for you.”

A kid at a cookout didn’t just challenge me to dance. He looked me dead in the eye, walked up, tapped my chest, and hit me with, “What’s up, old man?” And because my pride still thinks it’s 25, I stepped into the circle like I had something to prove. What happened next was equal parts hilarious, nostalgic, and brutally educational for anybody living in that over-40 reality.
 
 I break down how it started with harmless cookout staples: burgers, hot dogs, line dances, and that feeling of safety when you can still nail the Cupid Shuffle. Then the DJ slides into 90s hip-hop and crunk energy, the crowd tightens up, and one confident 10- to 12-year-old turns the park into a dance-battle arena. He was sandbagging at first, then flipped the switch and started moving like a trained performer. Suddenly, I’m doing mental math on whether my knees and back remember what my brain is demanding.
 
 The turning point is the mistake every grown dancer makes at least once: trying to match athletic tricks instead of staying in your lane. I talk about the cost-benefit ratio, why “I still got it” can be true and still not worth the injury, and how to prep for cookout season with smarter, age-appropriate moves that still get a reaction. If you love stories about confidence, competition, and learning the hard way, this one’s for you.

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Transcript

Summertime Energy And A Warning

SPEAKER_01 0:38

Man, I am out this week. Like I say, summertime is coming, and I just watched Stomp the Yard. And the reason why I watched it because last year I got caught up in a dance battle with this 10-year-old, maybe 10, 12-year-old, and unfortunately, I got served. But don't worry, I'm gonna tell you the story, and I'm gonna tell you how I'm gonna make sure it don't happen this summer when cookout season comes. Welcome to another episode of Unstripted After 40, the podcast. And like I was saying earlier, I watched Stomp the Yard. It came out in about 2007.

The Cookout Where It Started

SPEAKER_01 1:17

And it's this movie about, you know, these fraternities and they're stomping the yard. They got these pretty much, it's like dance battles against each other, right? And reason I'm watching this because as we all know, the summertime coming. Cookouts are on the rise, the heat makes people do crazy things, and one of these crazy things that I'm gonna do out there because I still got it. I'm gonna start challenging the young cats to dance battles, okay? Because last year I got called or got trapped into a dance battle. And I'm gonna tell you why I say I got trapped into a dance battle. So we're gonna back it up, back it up to last summer, okay? Last summer I went to a cookout up in VA, okay? And like I said, it was one of the friends' house cookout. I, you know, I just went to get some chicken, some hot dog, and burgers. The normal stuff you go get a cookout, and maybe a Coke or two, you know. And this cat, like I said, as always, you know, the music comes on and do the line dances and stuff. Everybody's sitting there, we're doing the cupid shuffle, right? I know I do the cupid shuffle. Then we then we sit there, you know, do the cuff it dance, you know, with Beyonce, and you go there and do the thing. So the line dances, I I got it. I'm I'm in the head because I still got the moves, you know. I still got the moves, but then they start playing some 90s hip-hop music. You know, the ones that get you crumped up in we get things, like um with a club at, and it start hitting like um, they're doing some TI, Outcast, and all the good hits, the golden hits, right? But as they're playing the music and I'm eating my burger on the sideline, I'm watching, you know, the little kids I ate dancing, reminding myself, like, man, I remember when I was their age and I knew I could dance better than everybody else, right? And I used to call adults out. And I'm thinking myself, like, this not about to happen to me. But what I am looking around, looking at all adults, I see this one kid, he's getting it. And as he's getting it, he keeps looking at me, like looking me in my eyes. Now, at first, I was saying, he's not looking at me. I'm imagining things. Because, like I said, when I was younger, I used to call out adults and dance battle them and school them, right? And I'm like, you know what? He's not looking at me because I'm that cat that used to do what he used to do. And he's not about to get me because you know, as the

The Kid Challenges Me Directly

SPEAKER_01 3:46

adult I am, I knew this day was coming and I was gonna be ready, right? I was gonna be ready. So I'm like, I'm in shorts, I'm in a shirt, I like I'm pretty in shape. He's not gonna call me out. But as he kept dancing and doing his little moves and doing his handstand with his clap up in the air with his feet with clip feet, clap like that, I like, oh no, this cat might be looking at me. So I might be imagining this. I I am imagining this. He he's not looking at me. So I look to my right, I look to my left, and I realize he's not looking at them. He is looking at me. And to confirm that he was looking at me or that he was calling me out to get served, he came up to me and hit my chest. Okay. Y'all know when somebody touch you, okay, that is a call out and that is fighting words, okay? And as the man I am, I have to defend my reputation. I have to defend my honor, okay? So at that point, I knew he was calling me out. And then to confirm what after what he did, he was looking at me, he came to me, he flicked my chest, and he said, What's up, old man? You ready? I'm like, he is talking to me. So I handed my plate to my partner to my right, and I gave it to him, and I brush myself off, and I say, DJ, hit it. So the DJ started

He Unleashes Next-Level Moves

SPEAKER_01 5:25

playing the song, right? And look at it, I said, nah, you know, let's see what you got, little man. Hey, when he started dancing and started doing his moves, it was at that point I knew I fucked up. You know how you bait and switch somebody? He was out there showing me that his his little fake moves, that he was just testing the water, trying to show people thing. He would, he, he didn't even bring out his best stuff. He was showing out the little small stuff that kind of get people to think that he can't dance. So when they get out there, he can, you know, like he said, like he's about to do to me, serve me. He's about to embarrass me. And when he started dancing, that little kid had some goddamn dance moves on him. You would have thought he'd been trained by Chris Brown, goddamn whole dance crew. I mean, that cat was moving. He did a like a three-flip in the sky and dropped down to a goddamn split. I'm thinking to myself, I don't even think I could do a backward flip now. I ain't did a backward flip in about freaking 10 to 15 years. I can't even follow what he was doing. And it was like, I don't know, it was like Chris Baum mixed with Michael Jackson, mixed with Neo. He was just goddamn doing it out there. I'm thinking to myself, this motherfucker done set me up, got me out here about to get embarrassed. But now remind you now, I I could dance still. I still got some moves in my head. I'm like, I'm not gonna let him totally embarrass me in front of all these people. But at this point, I let him go first. And this cat is actually fucking good. I mean, real fucking good. And like I said, he was only about maybe 10 or 12. But at this point, I like okay, I fucked up. So as he watching, I'm sitting here with my arms fold, I'm bobbing my head, I'm looking at him, I'm like, okay, and the crowd. Now, when this started, it was maybe about six of us around here watching these kids dance. Now it's a square of people, and mine is like a cookout in the park. So it was a lot of people at the park, maybe about 100 to 150. At this point now, all 150 of these motherfuckers want to come now and see this kid dance when he was dancing the whole time and nobody was watching him dance. But now that he done called me out to the dance floor, everybody in the goddamn mama's out there, okay? And they done form a goddamn square. I'm like, this motherfucker done set me up, okay? So, and like I say, he was getting it. So now he's getting it. They know he challenged me, and now I have to get ready, and they done formed the goddamn box. And you know, I backed up a little bit, and you know how you're trying to back up out the ring and get out of the situation? Nah, they they they looking at me like, Jay, you got to get them now. Jeff, don't let them do you like this. And you they just acting it on. I'm like, in my head, like, yo, this cat just did a backwards flip in the sky and came down to a split, dragged himself up, and then moonwalk back into the thing, and then did some other goddamn stuff. I don't even know what it was. I can't even describe the dance moves he was doing, but what if he was doing it was freaking outstanding and impossible for me to goddamn replicate. I'm like, how the hell did I get caught up into this dance battle? What the fuck? So now I'm thinking my head, it's a setup. They done set me up. They knew what's happening. That man or whoever child that was, they knew this was gonna happen. And I was just the sucker that they got. But I'm thinking myself, I'm good. I'm dancing mania, I can dance. So I'm flexing, I'm scratching. I'm like, okay, I'm getting ready. I gotta get my body ready, cause I gotta scratch my body out, right? Because, you know, DJ done hit it. The DJ about to play my music a little bit, right? And then he's gonna play some stuff, you know, like um, I forgot what it was. It was some 3-6 mafia, right? I think no 3-6 mafia or what thing, whatever it was. I can't remember the song out of my head, but what if it was a crump song? It was one of Lil John songs, right? Um, no, it wasn't Lil John. I'm I remember right now. It was um, what's the day? Everybody come to Found the Night. Ah god, I can't remember the song. If y'all remember the song, but Pyrock! That's what it was, Pyrock. So that was my song he started playing, right? So, you know, I can do a part right. And then say, everybody shuffling. Then I got then I can start getting my bands, and I got it. So, because when you say everybody's shuffling, that's when I my terms come in, right? Because like I say, the kid done finished, everybody went, ooh, then he's like, DJ's like, everybody shuffling. That was my signal to get myself ready and go into the dance battle. So I start shuffling to the dance battle,

My Backflip Split Goes Wrong

SPEAKER_01 10:35

right? So I did my stuff, start shuffling. Everybody like they ready. And like I say, now it's a crowd of people around me, like a square. Now the kid done killed it. I mean, when I say he killed it, he killed it. And I knew I had to do something to get myself out of this situation. So every doing the potty rocket song, I didn't around, did the little the thing, the what it called the the dizzy squares or dizzy feet or whatever, and started going around doing stuff, and I like, okay, I got it, I got it, I'm feeling it now, okay? I'm feeling it. It reminded me back when I was a little kid. So I'm getting them. I'm like, I'm getting the moves in, I'm going right. And then as I was halfway through my routine getting it on, right, my bright idea was that I think that I can do a goddamn backflip like he did. I don't know what the fuck I was thinking. Like I said earlier, I haven't done a back flip in about 10 to 15 years. Let you know, it's not like riding a bike. You know, if you ride a bike in 10 to 15 years, you can get on the bike and ride a bike. But riding a bike is not as dangerous as trying to do a backflip, okay? Now, I could have just stuck to what I knew and did the dance moves that I was doing. Because the dance moves I was doing was hitting, okay? It wasn't hitting as good as what the little kid did, but it was hitting it. It was like, okay, you know, everybody knows I'm old. You know, they knew we were just having some fun. And the kid was just having fun, right? And in the end, I didn't care that he beat me, but I still wanted to give him a good show, right? Um, in my head, I saw what the little kid did. I saw the backflip he did, right? And then he dropped down to a split and then came back up. I knew I can do that. Because like I say, although I started working out more this year, I was still in shape last year. I wasn't in a bad shape. So I like I can do this. So I got up, you know, like we in the middle, and then he talked about everybody shuffling, everybody shuffling, everybody, and that was that defeat. He kept hunting, right? So while he was doing that little mix, I came up, I I I run around the little circle camera thing. I got to the back corner, and I like, okay, I'm gonna do it. I can do this flip. I can I went, I did a back flip, right? Barely dropped into the split. When I dropped into the split, my childhood and everything went away. My nuts hit the ground so fucking hard, you would have swear that somebody kicked me from hell. Now, mine now, I sucked it up like a champion and I pulled myself up. But as I pulled myself up, the tears was coming out my eyes because it hurt so bad. And then I shipped back to the crowd and I fainted. Right? But they thought it was part of the dance move. No, I fainted for real life. Um, yeah, that that backflip, it took everything out of me when I went to the split and hit the ground. It was horrible. Um, I never felt so bad in my life. Like someone kicked me from the gates of hell, and they thought it was the best thing ever. Um, it was not the best thing ever. I made it look good, but in my mind, my body was done. Now the kid, he went back out and started dancing. I waved them off like as I'm limping away. Now, might not as a little back flip. It's like a mortal combat thing. You know how they show and say you you doing thing? My wrist now was hurting from that, okay. When I hit the ground, my back, when I hit the ground and the thing, my back hurt. And then, like I said, to top it off, I fucked my balls up. Okay. I'm never ever in life doing a backward flip with a split again. That part of my life is is gone.

Rules For Dance Battles After 40

SPEAKER_01 14:48

Um But I am gonna get ready for the dance battle this summer, because like I say, I'm gonna do moves in my head that are appropriate for my age. Um, that back for flip, bad idea. I first of all, I knew I was getting set up. I should have recognized I was getting set up, but I did not. Um That was my first mistake going out and doing the dance battle. That was a whole mistake. I I should have never done the dance battle. I should have just brushed it off and just, you know, left and not let my pride write me a check that my ass could not, you know, cash. Even though I did okay and I did pull it off, but at what cost did this happen? Because the cost-benefit ratio was not there. I failed horribly, but it's okay. This summer, this year, I'm gonna be ready with appropriate dance move for a person of my age. And when you call me out this year for a dance battle, for any of y'all out there listening, Jeff's gonna be ready, okay? I'm not doing backflip, I'm not doing the split. My back and balls and wrists can't handle it no more. But I'll be ready to give you whatever you want, and I will have my songs in my head. So for all y'all ready, little kids out there waiting for me or waiting for any old person, remember, we are ready to get you served. So if you're 40, start getting ready to make sure these kids get served, okay? But that's my rant for this week. Like I say, dance battles are coming, okay? Thank you for rocking with me.

Subscribe And Send Topic Ideas

SPEAKER_01 16:35

Please subscribe. Make sure that you push this to your friends, and let me know what kind of topics or you know suggestions that you got there, and we'll keep rocking it. So until next time, thank you, thank you, thank you. Dance battles are on, baby.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

Let me tell you, I'll give up.