Forgive YOURSELF

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Good morning. Come on in. I apologize for a delayed week, but we are here. I want you to come in slowly. I don't want you to rush. I don't want you to get ahead of the day. Just allow yourself to arrive here first before anything else starts asking something from you. And I need you to let your body settle into this moment, let your breath find its own rhythm, and give yourself permission to not be in a hurry just yet. You know the world will still be there for you in a few minutes, but right now, this moment is yours. And of course, you know that this is your gentle hour, your space to come back to yourself before you start pouring into anything or anyone else. And this morning I want us to sit with something that perhaps doesn't feel easy, but it's very necessary if you're going to move through your life without constantly carrying weight that no longer belongs to you. And this simple phrase is forgive yourself. When you forgive yourself, it's not later, it's not after you have proven that you've changed, not after you've gone back and mentally corrected everything that you wish you would have done differently. But right here, as you are this morning. Because in all honesty, a lot of us don't wake up on a clean slate. We do wake up carrying pieces of yesterday, conversations that perhaps didn't sit right, decisions we've been replaying, moments where we felt like we should have shown up differently, spoken up sooner, left earlier, or perhaps chosen ourselves in a way that we didn't. And baby, even if you don't say it out loud, you can surely feel it in how you move. There's a you know certain hesitation, a second guessing, a weight that shows up before your feet even hit the floor. But you know that holding on to something and learning from it are not the same thing. And often we do confuse the two. Because you know, somewhere along the way, we learn that if we just keep replaying it, if we just keep thinking about it long enough, then maybe, maybe we'll fix it in our minds. Maybe we'll redeem ourselves in some kind of way. Maybe we'll feel like we've done enough to deserve enough to move forward. But that's not how this works. You don't earn the right to move on by punishing yourself longer. You don't prove that you've grown by staying stuck in the same mental loop of what went wrong. And my babies, at some point, you have to allow yourselves to step out of that version of yourself. I want to pause. Let's take a deep breath in. And let's take a deep breath out. I want you to put your hand over your heart. And I want you to repeat after me. I forgive myself for the things that I didn't know. I forgive myself for the patterns I seem to repeat. I forgive myself for mistakes that I've made. And I forgive myself for thinking that I had to show up perfectly. Alright, let's inhale. And let's exhale. That was an intentional pause because I recognize that sometimes hearing the truth can make your heart feel heavy. Taking in many things can make you feel uncomfortable. So, we needed to take a break so that we can gather ourselves together. Now, what I want you to hear this morning is that you are not the same person that you were when you made a decision. You are not the same person who didn't know what you know now. You are not the same version of yourself that moved from a place of uncertainty, fear, hope, or even survival. You've seen more now, you understand more now, you feel differently now, and that matters. But baby, if you keep holding yourself to who you used to be, you don't give yourself room to become who you're trying to be. So, instead of staring out into the abyss, beating yourself up for what you didn't get right, I want you to finally let it go. I want you to, in this moment, I want you to shift your posture just a little. I want you to sit with yourself and ask, what am I still holding against myself? And listen, when you think of those thoughts, it's not about what they did, not what didn't work out, not what you can point to outside of you, but what have you been blaming yourself for? Maybe it's staying in something longer than you should have. Maybe it's giving your time, your energy, your love in a way that wasn't returned. Maybe it's ignoring what you felt in your spirit just to keep something going. Maybe my baby, it's choosing comfort over clarity or potential over the reality of things. Whatever it is, I need you to acknowledge it. And listen, this place is not a space of judgment. I don't want you to try to clean it up. I just want you to be honest with yourself. And then I want you to gently remind yourself that I did the best that I could with where I was. I want to repeat that again. I did the best I could with where I was. And it's not where you are, but where you were then. You gotta understand that you didn't have this level of clarity back then, you didn't have this perspective, you didn't have the same boundaries, the same understanding, or even the same strength that you have now. You, my baby, are learning. And learning doesn't it doesn't look graceful at times, it doesn't look like you made the right decision the first time. Sometimes learning looks like you know repeating something until it finally makes sense of why it doesn't work for you. Sometimes it looks like giving more than you should have just to understand where your limit is. Sometimes it looks like choosing something that hurts you, just so you can recognize what you truly deserve. So, my babies, why are you holding yourself hostage for being human? Why are you still holding on to something that was meant to teach you and not to trap you? This is where that forgiveness comes in. Forgiving yourself, okay? Listen, forgiving yourself is not pretending that it didn't happen, it's not excusing your choices or avoiding any kind of accountability. It is true that being honest about what happened and, you know, just recognizing your part in it. And it's also choosing to release yourself from the heaviness of what you've carried. It's you saying out loud, you know, I see it, I understand it, and I'm not going to stay here. Because you know, staying in something doesn't serve you. It doesn't help you grow, it doesn't help you move forward, and it definitely doesn't bring you peace. So this morning. This morning, before you get pulled into everything the day is going to acquire of you, I want you to sit with yourself for just a moment longer and say it. I forgive myself. And if it doesn't come out strong, maybe it's okay. You are not trying to force a feeling, you're just creating the space for it. Because forgiveness is not always a one-time decision. Sometimes it's something that you have to come back to, something that you have to remind yourself of when those thoughts try to come back and pull you into that past again. And maybe when they do, I want you to fight them very harshly. I don't want you to get frustrated with yourself or thinking about it again. I want you to meet yourself with the same kind of love and softness and admiration that you're learning right now. And gently bring yourself back. Remind yourself, you know, I've I've already learned what I needed to learn from this. I am choosing something differently. And you don't have to carry guilt into your growth, you don't have to carry shame into your next season, you don't have to keep reopening a chapter you've already read just to prove that you remember what they taught you. Oof. You can close it and still keep the lesson. So, as you move through your morning, I want to be mindful of how you speak to yourself. I want you to pay attention to those thoughts that try to remind you of what went wrong instead of agreeing with them. I want you to gently shift your mind. Choose to see yourself as someone who is learning, not someone who is failing. Choose to see yourself as someone who is growing, not someone who is behind. And choose to see yourself as someone who deserves peace, not someone who has to earn it through punishment. And most importantly, my baby, choose to forgive yourself not just in this moment, but as a practice because the more you give yourself that grace, the lighter you feel walking into the life that's ahead of you. Now, I need you to take a deep breath. Slow, steady, and let it go. Baby, you are allowed to start this day without having anything on your chest, without carrying everything from the last day. You are also allowed to move forward without dragging your past behind you, and and my baby, you are allowed to be someone new without asking permission to become the person that you need to be. Today I need you to move gently. I need you to take your time, and I need you to play this episode as many times as you need, and I'll meet you here again. Same space, same care, same love. Now breathe.