Reciprocity

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Well, hey my baby, welcome back to Gentle Hours. Let me apologize. Many of these gentle hours are scheduled, and I've been having some issues getting them to load in when they're supposed to. I did contact someone, and so from this point on, gentle hours should be consistent. Thank you for your patience. Before we begin this morning, I want you to settle into wherever you are. If you're driving, just let my voice keep you company. If you're at home, allow your shoulders to relax, unclench your jaw, and remind yourself that for the next few minutes there is nothing else you have to be. Take a slow deep breath in through your nose, hold it for a second, now let it all the way out. Again, breathe in and breathe out. One more. Fill your lungs completely and release. I pray that whatever followed you into this morning doesn't keep you from receiving what your heart needs today. This morning, you know, the word that we're going to be sitting with is reciprocity. You know, I think one of the hardest lessons we'll ever learn is recognizing the difference between loving someone and caring someone. Because, you know, those are not identical. One day you just realize that you're exhausted, that you're empty, that you're wondering how a relationship that started with so much promise becomes something that only survived because of your effort. A lot of us were taught that love meant giving, you know, giving grace, giving practice, giving another chance, giving understanding. And while there's beauty and generosity somewhere, you know, many of us forgot that healthy relationships were never designed to become one-way streets. Reciprocity isn't about keeping score. It isn't waking up saying, Well, I'll do this for you, so now you owe me. Reciprocity is the natural rhythm that happens when two hearts understand that relationships require both people to water the garden. Because flowers don't bloom simply because one person keeps showing up with a watering can while the other keeps pulling the roots out of the ground. Eventually, even the healthier soil becomes tired. And maybe that's why, you know, some of us find ourselves, you know, just genuinely tired. Not angry, we're not necessarily bitter, we're just tired, tired of always being the first one to call. We're the one to apologize first, the one to check in first, the one to make the plans first, the one to fix what didn't we didn't even break. And after a while, you know, you stop asking yourself, how can I love them better? And then you begin, you know, asking yourself, why am I the only one protecting something that belongs to both of us? And that's a fair question. Because love shouldn't constantly feel like you're trying to convince someone to care. You shouldn't have to beg someone to consider your feelings, and you shouldn't have to, you know, make yourself small to expectations all the way down to the floor to keep somebody from stepping over them. I think sometimes we confuse, you know, consistency with overextending ourselves. And we'll then tell ourselves that we're loyal, you know, we're just being patient, we're just being understanding, but every now and then, it's healthy to stop and ask yourself whether you're being calling of the survival in you, or you're calling it by another name. Reciprocity doesn't demand perfection. And baby, there will be seasons when one person carries a little bit more because life happens. Someone gets sick, someone, you know, loses a loved one, someone just needs an extra hand. That's what love does. It steps in while life becomes overwhelming, but healthy love also knows how to return it. You know, it'll let you carry something for a while, but then you realize it's my turn to hold something as well. The greatest gifts that we can give to one another is being human enough to give. It's the ability to give and let rest without making you feel guilty for being tired. I learned that people reveal what they value by what they consistently make room for. Reciprocity feels like consideration. It also feels like a partnership. It feels like realizing that somebody else's heart is just as invested in protecting yours as you are in protecting theirs. You are worthy of relationships where care travels in both directions. Whether that is family or friendships, marriage, or the people you simply choose to do life with, you are worthy of not always, being the strongest one in the room. You are worthy of receiving the same gentleness you've been giving away. And maybe that's what God has been trying to teach some of us. That's, you know, receiving is just as holy as it is of giving. Because if all you ever know how to do is pour, eventually you forget that you are created to be poured into. Now, before we leave each other this morning, I want you to take one more breath with me. I want you to breathe in. I want you to hold it. And then I want you to simply let it go. As you move through today, I want you to pay attention to the relationships that leave you, you know, feeling seen, heard, and considered. Then pay attention to the people who don't just celebrate what you do for them, but who also care for the person doing it. And if you've been caring relationships that only know how to receive from you, I pray you find the courage to ask yourself whether your heart deserves the same care you've been willing to give away. Because, my baby, it does. And my baby, I love you. I thank you for spending a little piece of your morning with me. I want you to have a beautiful day and a beautiful week, and I'll meet you right back next week at 7 o'clock for another gentle hours. Until then, I want you to be gentle with yourself.

unknown 6:01

Bye.