Mile 20 Mindset Podcast Episode 017 - Featuring Athule Mbekeni

Introduction:  
Welcome to another inspiring episode of the Mow 20 Mindset podcast, where we delve into the transformative power of running. In this episode, host Allen Maldonado speaks with Athule Mbekeni, a passionate runner who shares his journey from casual running to conquering a marathon. Join us as we explore the profound impact running has had on Athule's mental health and personal growth.

Section 1: The Beginning of a Passion  
Athule's love for running began in high school, where he found solace in the sport during challenging times. Initially, running served as a way to pass the time, but it soon became a form of therapy for his mental health struggles. Athule recalls, "I dealt with a lot of mental issues at the time... running was actually part of something that would be healing for me." This underscores how often our hobbies can serve deeper purposes in our lives, offering clarity and a means to cope with life's challenges.

Section 2: Setting Goals and Challenging Oneself  
As the new year rolled in, Athule decided to set ambitious goals, including running a marathon. "I wanted to change... what better way to do that by achieving something like running a marathon?" This determination led him to choose the New York Marathon as his first marathon, recognizing it as one of the toughest races due to its challenging terrain. With the marathon scheduled for November, Athule began training in July, setting the stage for a life-altering journey.

Section 3: The Training Process  
Training for the marathon taught Athule invaluable lessons about perseverance and consistency. "One thing I learned about myself is that I can do hard things," he stated. This consistency not only improved his running but also positively influenced other aspects of his life, including his diet and daily routines. Athule’s commitment to training reinforced the idea that dedication and hard work yield results, changing how he approached challenges both on and off the track.

Section 4: The Challenges of Isolation  
Despite the benefits of running, Athule candidly discussed the isolation that often accompanies training, especially for long-distance runners. Living in North Miami Beach, he found limited community support, leading to many solitary runs. "Running is a sport that you do alone... it's you and your thoughts the whole time." While this isolation can be challenging, Athule appreciates running as an opportunity to confront and process personal thoughts, turning potential negatives into a therapeutic experience.

Conclusion: Key Takeaways  
Athule Mbekeni’s journey illustrates the profound impact running can have on mental health, personal growth, and resilience. Through his story, we learn that running is not just a physical activity but a means of self-discovery and healing. Key takeaways from this episode include:  
1. Running can serve as a powerful tool for mental health and personal clarity.  
2. Setting ambitious goals can lead to significant personal transformations.  
3. Consistency and dedication in training can positively affect all areas of life.  
4. The solitary nature of running can foster deep self-reflection and personal growth.  

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Hey, what's up? Welcome to another episode of Mal20 Mindset. This is a running podcast for elite runners, running enthusiasts, and even your novice runners are even those that just love to support the runners in their life. Um, I got an incredible runner uh today, a friend of mine, Adule Umbekeni. Welcome to the show.

SPEAKER_04 0:26

Thank you. I'm so honored to be on the show. Honestly, I I don't consider myself an elite runner, but I love to run. If there's anything you should know about me, is that I love to run. So I'm really, really honored to be part of to be part of this.

SPEAKER_02 0:40

No, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Um I'm excited to have you on. Um I know you personally, so I know about your love for running, but I don't know, like, where did where did it all begin? Like, where did your love for running start?

SPEAKER_04 0:58

Wow, it in high school.

SPEAKER_02 1:01

Okay, and it was it and was it because of just personal fitness? Like, tell me the why.

SPEAKER_04 1:08

You know, the why has now changed because in retrospect, I think back and I'm like, that's why I was running. But when I started running, it was just to I think at that time it was just to bypass time. But in retrospect now, because I dealt with a lot of mental issues at the time that I started running, but I didn't know that running was actually part of something that would be healing for me at the time. I mean, in high school, mental health wasn't really some a subject that was spoken about. And, you know, I loved sports. It was my way of just getting out to clear my head. And I I started running just because I loved it at the time and just because it was passing time. I mean, in high school, I lived in boarding school. There wasn't really a lot to do. So all I did was obviously go to school and play sports. But in retrospect, now I'm thinking it was definitely something that I did in order to have that mental clarity, in order to be a therapist to myself in a sense. And so when I think about it now, the best answer I can give you to that question is because I started running because I I needed to heal my mental, my mental health at the time. And it's it's still something that resonates even with me today.

SPEAKER_02 2:31

No, listen, I I I run for the same reason. It's it's my therapy, it's um it's a conversation that I get to have with myself. That I I'm unable to do anything, doing it any other way. Like running it, although I may be running away from where I started, I am I can't run from me, and that's why I love those sort of internal conversations that I have while I'm running. So uh speaking of internal conversations, um where did this idea, when did this conversation with yourself happen, like, oh, I want to run a marathon? Because it's like, okay, I'm running for for my mental health, but then like 26.2 like where where did that idea, how did that spark?

SPEAKER_04 3:20

Well, you know, when I started running, I never thought I'd run a marathon ever. It was never something that was ever in my mind. I actually ran my first marathon in 2024. Well, the New York, uh the New York Marathon was my first marathon, which come to find out, is uh a here, it's one of the hardest because of the heels. And I've got to start with that one.

SPEAKER_02 3:44

I was like, you started off with a bang. So so what was what was the the moment when you were like, was it a run? Was it like, oh, I want to challenge myself? Like, what was it about I want to do this and when when can you recall when that happened?

SPEAKER_04 4:03

I think at the beginning of the year, I set out to do hard things. You know, when the new year starts, you have all these resolutions. But I wanted to change. And with anything in life, if you want to make a change, if you want things to change, you want, you have to change yourself. And so I wanted to challenge myself to do hard things. And what better way to to do that by achieving something like running a marathon? You know, it's one of the hardest things. Not everybody can not everyone can even run a mile. And I was already I was already in love with running. I I love to run. And so I thought, you know what, I'm actually going to challenge myself and do a full marathon, not a half marathon, but a full marathon. So beginning of the year, I I wanted to challenge myself. I I took on that um that big goal. And I think New York Marathon really just came to me because I was looking for a marathon that's far out in the year.

SPEAKER_00 5:08

Like it's close to the end of the year. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 5:14

And so um, one of the last marathons in that year is obviously the New York Marathons, it's all the way in November.

SPEAKER_04 5:21

And so I was like, okay, I'll I'll have all this time to train. And I think around July was the time that I started training, because that's when I found out that I actually was able to run through a charity. I was fortunate enough to run for a charity, which also really resonated with me.

SPEAKER_02 5:38

Okay, so so speaking of speaking of training, um I would I would love to know what was like what did you learn about yourself through training? You start in July, you get this thing going, you gotta do you have a plan, like uh explain, explain getting to that training process.

SPEAKER_04 5:58

You know, when you're training, one thing you have to do is be consistent, right? Because you you you've set out this goal, and I think one thing through training that I learned about myself is that I can do hard things, one, and number two is that I'm able to be consistent, I'm able to do what I've set my mind to do. And so that really kind of helped me with other areas of my life that if I if I say I'm gonna do something, the best way to achieve results is by being consistent. And so with training, I realized that, you know, I've ran all my life, but I've kind of always ran the same distance, nothing really changed. I'd run maybe a mile, two miles. It was never serious. But with training, you start falling in love with your maybe your PR, you start falling in love with how you run. And so a lot of changes came about with just how I run. And also with just like mentally, like a lot of things changed internally for me. Like a lot of clarity, a lot of just you know, I have to wake up at six in the morning and therefore I have to sleep early. You know, you like my life became a little bit more organized than it was. And so certain things that I would partake in or do, I was like, no, I have to be a little bit more focused, even the way that I eat, you know. So a lot of things kind of became a lot better for me. I changed a lot of my ways. I became a little bit um, you know, better in terms of my mental health as well. And so I think it just impacted not just the way that I ran, but every area of my life in terms of um just being better off, you know, on and off the field.

SPEAKER_02 7:45

Okay. Okay, so so what was the the hardest part of training that I think no one talks about while going through the process of those mile after mile, day after day. What do you think was the hardest part of that?

SPEAKER_04 8:03

I think you know, running is a sport that you do alone. And I mean it's great. I live in Miami and there's a lot of people that you're able to run with. But at that time I lived in an area north Miami Beach. There weren't a lot of people that were running where I lived when I was training for the New York Marathon. And so it's something that you kind of that I had to push and do alone, right? I'd say, you know, part of it is kind of you you feel isolated when everybody's out having fun or everybody's, you know, just doing what we do, right? We live in Miami, people go out, they go to, you know, parties, whatever. But if you're focused on running and you know, you're training for this New York marathon, there's certain things that you can't always do. So there is that level of isolation that I think a lot of people don't talk about. And I think especially when you live in a city like Miami, where you know you see the Brick Row Run Club, all these you know communities, but it's not every community where you're able to go and join that. Like if you live in a place like North Miami, not everybody is running. It's not a community that has a lot of runners, it's not a community that focuses on wellness. And so I trained all by myself. I ran ran almost every day by myself. So I think you know, people don't really talk a lot about the isolation that comes with running because it's not a team sport. When you're playing soccer or exactly if you're playing soccer or nipple, you know, training consists of being with people all the time. When you're running, it's you and your thoughts the whole time. And sometimes when you're running, even though you know we talk about how running can be so therapeutic, you know, sometimes you'll go on a run and you know, thoughts in your head can come back and make you feel like, you know, oh damn, this is taking me back in my hole. You know, because you're isolated, you're alone. And so, you know, thoughts will attack you as you're running. You know, the the great thing about it is that you're able to deal you're able to deal with them out in the open instead of dealing with your thoughts, you know, when you're alone in a dark room, which is what I love about running. It's like if I'm alone in a dark room, you know, you'll always feel depressed, right? But with running, even though it is an isolated sport and you know, it is a sport that you do alone, you just have to have that courage by yourself to take yourself out of bed and get out and go running. That way you're able to, you know, kind of tackle whatever thoughts, because they will be there in your head. Whatever thoughts you have, you kind of have to tackle them, you know, by yourself because you don't have a coach that's going to, you know, can't nobody step in. Otherwise.

SPEAKER_02 10:49

Yeah, like it's it's um, it teaches, I feel like when you you know, it teaches you how to have a conversation in a relationship with yourself in a way you probably um aren't uh aren't able to due to the so many distractions in the in the world, your phones, families, work, survival, all those things. I think when Ronnie, that's that that's that running high you get is that sort of self-love in you being able to have that conversation with yourself and be honest, because nobody, nobody, you can you can only judge yourself, and what's the point of that? And um So take us take us to take us to to race day. Take us to race day. This is your first marathon. This is New York, because New York is crazy. I've I've done it three times. Take me to take me to race day.

SPEAKER_04 11:41

So before I take you to race day, actually, uh I I I want to go back a little bit because then you'll realize how impactful race day was.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

Okay, talk to me.

SPEAKER_04 11:50

So I when I was running, I got in with a charity and I was raising um, you know, obviously for children's cancer. My stepdad passed away a week before, and he passed away, he had cancer. And so I was going to cancel the whole thing and go to South Africa. My mom gets to South Africa because at the time she was visiting me in Miami. She gets home and she was like, the funeral is moved. It's actually, you know, a week before, so you want you're not gonna make it anyway. And so I was like, wow, I, you know, I'm I'm already in New York, so you know, I'm running for, you know, obviously the charity where it's ray I'm raising funds for children with cancer. And so it ties in. And so I was like thinking about him the whole time as I'm running. But obviously, before then, I'm I'm just numb, but I'm also thinking about all the, you know, when you're running the New York Marathon, everybody has an opinion, especially if you live in Miami. Oh my gosh, you're training background, it's going to be it's going to have heels. How are you gonna do it? So already I have those thoughts, and then I'm also carrying this heavy weight.

SPEAKER_03 12:58

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 12:58

So and what I mean is, like, what was you get you gotta take the ferry? Did you take the ferry over? Like, I you have all these thoughts in your head, you get to the starting line, you see all of these people, and then when you get over to the island, it's it's your survival of the fittest because it's freezing.

SPEAKER_04 13:19

You see so many people, it is so cold, you have all these clothes.

SPEAKER_03 13:24

Ellen, when I was training, I was training in a sports brand, that's it. And then come race day, I have three jackets and all these leggings, and it's 4:30 a.m. I have to figure out when am I getting this bus. Fortunately, I didn't have to take the ferry, I only took a bus. We took the bus.

SPEAKER_00 13:43

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

SPEAKER_04 13:45

You know, so that was because I was very scared about the ferry. I'd never taken a ferry, you know, in New York. And so I was like, oh my gosh. But I figured out a way where I was able to get to a destination, and I took the bus, took me straight um over to the island. But, you know, I again, even though running is, you know, a lot of people run, I was all by myself. I didn't know any other runners. And it's like thousands and thousands of people. Yes. But you know, you're still alone, and you know, all these thoughts are running through my head. I'm thinking, well, what? I I should have just gone home anyway. No, you know, what am I doing here?

SPEAKER_03 14:24

You know, so I think all those were just nerves. Like, oh my gosh, like I've never run a marathon before. So you know, and it's so cold, you know.

SPEAKER_02 14:33

It's freezing. So as you as you peel off, because when you get closer, they you know, you you kind of uh derobe and you take off the warm clothes and get ready for this run. And I don't know how, because you have sweats, people throw them to the side. Like you get to the starting line in your corral goes. What is going through your mind as you're taking your first steps in the marathon?

SPEAKER_04 15:00

The thing with the New York marathon, the great thing about it is that, you know, I think it's so celebrated. I'm yet to run another marathon, so I don't have any comparison yet. But even at the starting line, music is blasting. And so all of that was kind of calming my nerves. But as we're starting, I'm thinking, oh my gosh, am I ready? How am I gonna do it? And did I train enough? So all those thoughts are coming in my head, right? But because the music is so loud and everyone around you is obviously now getting excited, you know, all of that was now calming me down. And you start thinking about all the reasons why you you actually made the decision to do this. And I'm starting, I started thinking about, okay, you know what? I I've trained, you know, I'm ready, I can do hard things. I've sacrificed um, you know, going out, I've sacrificed eating uh, you know, a burger, or you know, like you think about all these things that you sacrifice, you know, like you know what I'm ready. And if I if I can do this, I can do harder things, you know, like and so I think because it was so many people and so many people that are kind of in the same doing the same thing as you, like your nerve starts to calm down a little bit. So as about to begin, you know, you're like, okay, we're doing this. You're head you're here now, there's no there's no turning back. The finish started, the finish is all over in the other.

SPEAKER_02 16:21

It's in motion. We are in motion. So, so this is this is let's get to the let's get to the good part. Let's let's go there. Let's go to the moment that I'm I'm sure every marathoner goes through, and that is the wall. That is the Mal20 mindset of when like whatever thoughts that have been stashed away in the back of your head, they they seem to resurface and you have to deal with them while running this marathon. When what mal was that? Let's when was that? Describe that moment, please.

SPEAKER_04 16:57

You know, it was so it was amazing because when I started running, I was like, okay, here's my strategy. I'm gonna run, you know, four miles and I'm gonna walk and I'll run another four just so I can finish this thing. My goal is to finish because I will not be embarrassed and not finish. The goal is to finish. Yeah, but as I'm running, I think, you know, New York has, you know, it's it's phenomenal because like the whole city comes to support you. And so as I'm running, I, you know, I I felt this energy, everybody's there. I mean, I don't know these people, but they're there cheering you on. And that kind of really that drove me through the miles. I think I ran the whole way without stopping until maybe mile 17. And then mile 17, I started to slow down. But then in my head, I was like, wow, I'm I'm actually doing this, I can do that.

SPEAKER_03 17:54

Wow, so from the strategy of four miles in okay, okay, okay, until 17 miles, but then mile 20 starts to creep in, and I'm like, yo, okay. I don't know, am I gonna finish? I cannot feel my legs, and so I'm I'm already here, like I have six more miles, I can do this, but you know, like the that mile, like all the way from mile one to mile 17.

SPEAKER_04 18:27

I I have to say, what really drove me was the crowd because I never you feel so celebrated, everybody's there cheering you on, and then it makes you realize wow, this I'm I'm actually this is a hot thing, and I'm doing it. Once you get to that mile 20, you know it, Alan.

SPEAKER_03 18:45

You you run like oh yeah, oh yeah, no, your mind wants to finish, and you're like, I can't do this.

SPEAKER_04 18:53

Yeah I'm still I'm still in this race, but your body is like giving in. It's like you can't go anymore. And so it's like a mental battle at this point, right? It's like a mental battle, but that also like it prepares you for life because it it makes you realize, and I think that's what I had to kind of trick my mind at that point that you know, life does get like this. You know, when you're closer to your goals, when you're closer to your dreams, it kind of it puts all these battles. And so this is the battle that I'm going through. This is not a race, this is life. And so, you know, whatever it means, you have to do it. If it means you have to crawl, if it means you have to walk, yes, you you know, at that at that point I was, you know, walking more than I was running. Right, right. At that point, you know, you're like, I I am doing this, you know, I'm gonna finish. This is what matters, I'm gonna get to that goal, right? Because this is what life is going to be like, this is what life is. You don't need to give up.

SPEAKER_02 19:55

So speaking of the goal, it gets tough. So speaking of the goal, um, what what did it feel like finally crossing the finish line? Point two of them things. You you did it. You you you had your strategy, you the crowd of New York hyped you up for 17 miles, and you push through to get to that finish line. What did it what did it feel like?

SPEAKER_03 20:23

You know, the first the first feeling I have to be honest, I was like, I'm so glad I'm done. I cannot feel my legs, my toes. Nothing is working, right?

SPEAKER_01 20:36

Like, I'm done. You know, you know, and you couldn't even so tired, you couldn't even feel nothing. That's when you can't feel anything.

SPEAKER_03 20:43

I can't feel anything. I'm like, what was I thinking? You know, and like that that's the first thought. I'm like, my goodness, this is done. Like, what was I thinking? Why didn't I do this?

SPEAKER_04 20:56

But then moments later, you look back, you're like, I did that. You know, like I I did such a hard thing. Like running a marathon is not easy. But then when you're done, when you when you're finished, yes, your body is going to your body's going to be asking all kinds of questions, like, do you hate me? But it's going to, you know, it's it's going to be like I was so proud of myself. And then I, you know, I I realized, I think it dawned on me at that point that this is a big deal. You know, I I I I don't think it had registered throughout the training, throughout the beginning, throughout the running, that you know, running a marathon is such a big deal. And so, you know, after those moments of you know feeling like I'm betraying my body, you know, I look back and I realize this is actually such a big deal. I'm so proud of doing this, you know. And in New York, you have to walk another mile to get off, you know, like

SPEAKER_01 22:00

After you finish, you gotta walk a whole nother mile to get out of there. No, that's a fact.

SPEAKER_03 22:05

I am looking for a wheelchair. Like, I cannot walk. I can't do anything.

SPEAKER_01 22:10

We hire the guys, the guys with the bicycles. Oh, they coming up that day.

SPEAKER_02 22:16

Yes, whatever they can charge me$2,000. I'm getting in there. You got me. I have no legs. Yeah, no. The bicycle cats around there around that time, they gumped, they coming up marathon. Yo, that that walk is brutal.

SPEAKER_04 22:31

And then you get to the train station, you turn down the stairs, up the stairs. This makes no sense.

SPEAKER_01 22:39

You see people walking backwards. No, no, I've done that too. I've definitely had to hit the subway app. Yeah, yeah. It's it's a it's it's a bad look. But everybody that sees you is still cheering you on, though. Because you have your coat on, you know, you're and you definitely got your metal, you definitely got your metal on. So everybody still rooting you on, even though they see you hurting, they still rule you on.

SPEAKER_02 23:03

So with that being said, uh what is what is running this marathon? Has it what has it done to you as a person outside of outside of running? What is what does this marathon mean to you and how has it impacted your life post-marathon?

SPEAKER_04 23:21

I think just the realization that, you know, it's such a big deal to run a marathon. And also just realizing that, you know, a percentage of people in the world are able to run a marathon. I think for me, that makes me realize that I cannot only do hard things, but I can do everything that I set my mind to do. And so, you know, throughout my life, I know that everything is possible. So just running the marathon makes me realize that I can achieve all my desired dreams and goals. You know, nothing is impossible for me. It means that I have to work hard, I have to be consistent. You know, it's like when you think about running a marathon, you have to train, you have to do, you have to, you know, sacrifice, you have to, you know, get up when you don't want to, you know. And so that's with every goal that I now embark on, right? I think about it as if it's training for a marathon. I think about, you know, the sacrifices. I'm like, I've done this before, I've sacrificed, and therefore, if I want this goal, it does life doesn't just hand things to you. If I want to be successful, if I want a certain achievement, I have to train for it. So that means I have to be consistent. I have to continuously do it. I have to sacrifice things that are not important to focus on just that. And so I think it has made a huge impact in just how I, you know, attain certain things in my life and how I reach for my goals.

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Wow. No, it beautifully said, um, I'll ask you one last question before we go to our our knees out speed round. Um, if there's one tip you can give to a person running their first marathon, um, what would it be?

SPEAKER_04 25:11

I'd say, you know, if you tell people, if you tell small-minded big dreams, they're always going to kill your dreams, right? It was like with me, when I said I'm gonna run a marathon, certain people would were like, oh, it's it's so hard, you know, why are you running New York, right? So if someone wants to run their marathon for the first time, I'd say you already are able to achieve the right the uh you already are able to achieve big things. So go for it. You know, like don't look back, be consistent, have the drive, and go for it.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Awesome, awesome, awesome. Okay, well, let's go ahead and um get to the knees out speed questions. Um Okay. So they're they're one word, they're one word answers, and knees out means yes, you know. Um shout out to the knees out coalition, that's my running crew. Um you already know. Um, but knees out is, you know, that's the that's the that's the the year to life, the year to running, get your knees out. And as we as uh I like to wear my knees out often with my short shorts.

SPEAKER_04 26:29

Um we know it. We've seen your knees.

SPEAKER_02 26:32

Exactly. That was that was before it was even cool. But anyways, um first question is was there any time in training that you thought about quitting and you still showed up for yourself?

SPEAKER_03 26:47

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 26:48

All right, of course. All right, all right, all right, and um do you believe that everyone has a marathon in them?

unknown 27:02

Oof.

SPEAKER_01 27:05

Yo, yo, I it never failed. Everybody I ask, they always be like, oh like everybody like honest truth, I want to say yes.

SPEAKER_04 27:17

Listen, I I want to say yes, I really do. I really do, but I'm gonna say no for today.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

Okay, okay, okay, okay. Hey, no, valid, valid, valid, valid, valid, valid, valid.

SPEAKER_02 27:31

Okay, so the next the next question is um do you think running a marathon is more mental or physical?

SPEAKER_04 27:40

Mental for sure. It's more mental.

SPEAKER_02 27:43

Okay, okay. And um, would you run another marathon after your first one?

SPEAKER_03 27:50

Well, yes, right? Like that's what we do to ourselves. I mean, once you run the first one, right?

SPEAKER_02 27:56

It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. That mouth I think the mouth after the New York is really when you be like, you know what, I don't know if I want to do this again. That is that conversation. That that long walk is where you be like, you know what, this ain't. Why did I, why did I chew? Why did I pay for this? I paid for this. I paid to be treated this way.

SPEAKER_01 28:15

Like, and I did it to myself. Like, do I really love myself? Like, all of these. All right, so last one.

SPEAKER_03 28:21

Way off because then you start thinking about, oh, damn, that was good, actually.

SPEAKER_02 28:25

That a couple days later, or even that evening, you're like, you know what? I'm signing up for another one.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

When is the next one?

SPEAKER_02 28:32

Yes, exactly. So, last question is um do you believe running can change someone outside of the mouths?

SPEAKER_04 28:41

100%. Yes. Yeah, yes. It's changed me. I'm I'm so disciplined in in life, and I contribute that to running.

SPEAKER_02 28:53

All right. Well, well, again, thank you, thank you, thank you so much for joining the podcast. Uh, that is uh the end of another episode of Mal20 Mind Sets. Everyone out there, please follow and subscribe. Till next time, peace.