The Second Friday the 13th Show of 2026

The monkeys discuss crazy sh*t like Olympic Ski Jumpers injecting acid into their crotch's, Coffin Meditation in Japan, Danes asking people for their house pets to be used as Zoo Food, and more madness from around the globe... into the monkey barrel!

Check out the Tripp (and Graham) has Issues podcast!

Transcript

SPEAKER_05 0:00

Here we come, walking down on the street. Got the goal, no taxes to me. Free to speak and free to trade. Markets have no need for the microphone monkeys. People say we're around our kids, funkeys. Hey, well, my brother.

SPEAKER_02 0:29

Hey guys, welcome to Microphone Monkeys. We have the full five gang of five today. We had a uh a vacancy last week. Our hippie Hindu friend Aaron Atherton had to uh take care of some private business, but now he's back in all his glory. Oh man. He's fully clothed.

SPEAKER_04 0:53

A misty guy. Do you have anything under that rope?

SPEAKER_02 1:01

That's a surprise. Surprise. And we have uh our dark web superstar, Will uh Detmering. Yes, and the uh the downloads keep can keep coming, yeah. Yeah, download secret uh VHS downloads. We have Maniac Mike from the gun show. Put the gun Connecticut Mike. Is that gun loaded? This is my rifle, this is my gun. And stone cold Steve Hoffman, the the ladies' man.

SPEAKER_00 1:39

Yes, less government, more THC.

SPEAKER_04 1:47

Athletes endosed you before this episode. He's tricky about that. That's right. Peace, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:55

So our first story today. I found a couple new news sources outside of India Times. New news sources? That's not that's not the dark web, Will does Wisconsin. They get their dairy from something. So in Japan. Tying it in when Sterren comes back in, the East comes back, the news stories come back. So a funeral home and spa in Japan are offering meditation experiences where people lay inside coffins to contemplate uh mortality. This is like Japanese, it's a little darker than uh your Hindu stuff, but it sounds like a goth party. Yeah, it's probably it's something like that. It's maybe like a nihilist party. Preparing for departure. Yeah, they are. That's how they do therapy in Japan. Uh it's called coffin lying, and it has become popular where customers can choose different coffin styles, whether the coffin's opened or closed, what type of music and videos they want to see during their 30-minute session in the coffin. And the idea is confronting death can help appreciate life more. So they take a dark turn on Darren's philosophy. They do Japanese style.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

I want an open coffin and I want to see weekend at Bernie's.

SPEAKER_02 3:23

That's a good plan back.

SPEAKER_04 3:26

When you did you ever see the movie Soylent Green? Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 3:29

Oh, I've never seen it. I saw the trailer too. You've got to see that. Based on McDonald's.

SPEAKER_04 3:34

It's pretty much a business model.

SPEAKER_02 3:36

I think it has a bad ending.

SPEAKER_04 3:38

But they had they have when they're yeah. When they had Booker in the uh and you know, they had him for his uh final days. You know, they put you in a room and and they put on the music that you want and the videos and all this other stuff. That's what it reminds me of when you say that.

SPEAKER_02 3:57

It is, it's very dark and nihilistic. I love how therapy in Japan is basically, oh, you're depressed. Uh go line a coffin for a while and think about your coming death. It's a little different than uh SJW American uh soft pillow cushion therapy.

SPEAKER_01 4:13

Well, it's like a positive version of the Egyptian way of dying. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:19

It's basically uh, yeah, you're stressed. Well, you're insignificant and you you you'll be dying soon. So are you are you good now?

SPEAKER_04 4:26

Less brains coming through the nasal passages, but yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:29

I could do that pre-embalming, you know? And meditate on sliding down the razor blade of life. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:36

That's a very optimistic and up uplifting. Is that why the Japanese suicides are so high? They're just so dark and they just torture themselves.

SPEAKER_03 4:46

There's a I you know, I worked in Japan a couple of times and I've been there a couple of times. There's a have you been to Tokyo? Oh, yeah. They but I mean the idea of failure is looked at a lot differently. It's a it's much more pressure than than we have. Right? Like for instance, here when you're failing, you know, they put you further away from the window and closer to the door and away from everybody else in an office space. In Japan, they put you at the window as you're gonna go out. Throw you out the window. Yeah, you're gonna your next move is out the window. Basically, like in a careful factory. Executives get the window there, they get thrown out. And what I found is like, you know, the Americans would go, why isn't this working? And they'd talk to the whole group of people, the managers and everybody working, why isn't this working? Everybody get together and go, It's not working because of this. Right? And we need to fix this. And that guy did this, and we'd all argue and go, okay, let's fix that. In Japan, nobody says anything.

SPEAKER_04 5:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 5:45

Like admitting that failure is really, really hard. Living with the failure is really, really hard. It's a soci social. Some of the Koreans are that way too. I've not been to Korea, but I imagine that they are.

SPEAKER_02 5:56

Yeah. Well, Japan is like the British of the East. They're like the shebang fancy.

SPEAKER_03 6:02

They are they are they are they are the English of the East. They really are. They love music, they love drinking, they're very borderly, and they go freaking bonkers. Like on a Friday night, they're walking into walk. Yeah, they go. They're like the English in a lot of ways.

SPEAKER_02 6:18

Yeah, but they do have a little reserved in nuts. Little sprinkle of octopus porn and uh eight-limbed monster anime.

SPEAKER_00 6:27

Yes, octopus. But it's okay to get wasted at night because they let you sleep it off at work.

SPEAKER_02 6:38

They also, if you look at in Tokyo, they have like the smallest micro apartments on the planet.

SPEAKER_04 6:46

Apartments, that's where you're going with that.

SPEAKER_02 6:47

Okay. Well, they're Asian. I was gonna say those those are plenty. You should talk too preparation for the caskets. Yeah, yeah. That you know, another thing about Japan, they're the only like G7 country that has a suicide rate. They they like rival Cuba. Wow, and everyone always talks about suicides in the US, but the per capita suicides actually telescopically higher in Japan.

SPEAKER_03 7:15

Is it gender-based? Is it like males that they're gonna do?

SPEAKER_02 7:17

I think it's I think a vast majority male.

SPEAKER_01 7:20

Yeah, yeah. God, the woman must be bitching at them worse than all the hair.

SPEAKER_02 7:24

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 7:25

I mean, they you might be right, but I don't think they even have the women. Like, they're not even pairing up and having children. Yeah, they're not. It's that's a big problem.

SPEAKER_02 7:32

It's a lot of good populations declining and their economy staggering.

SPEAKER_04 7:36

I'll tell you, the Japanese are absolutely brutal on the Muslims.

SPEAKER_02 7:42

Really? Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 7:43

They are uh they've got laws and everything else.

SPEAKER_02 7:46

There's they don't they don't got way more strict with them. Yeah. That lady was talking to the company. Yeah. Well, it's already like 99% Japanese in Japan, like ethnically, and whatever Hindu walk over there.

unknown 8:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:02

Well, yeah, they they get the uh samurai sword out for the 1% that are left.

SPEAKER_01 8:07

So here's the sushi.

SPEAKER_03 8:11

A lot of their immigrant population is Filipino, right? So the a lot of the workers come from the Philippines. That's true. And there's they're not not a good relationship.

SPEAKER_02 8:20

So if the Japanese are like the British or the Filipinos like the like the Polish Russian immigrants or the Mexicans of uh Asia, maybe it's the it's the Japanese.

SPEAKER_01 8:30

I don't know enough. The Japanese though, don't they have a high life expectancy? Okinawa. Okinawa's a blue zone.

SPEAKER_04 8:38

Yeah, yeah. It's it's it's uh it's really strange. Out of all the islands, they're Okinawa, uh Okinawa, like you were saying, has got the huge life expectancy. But then Tokyo, on their national average, the Tokyo wipes out their New York City to them over there.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

Exactly. The stress. That's what we were talking about.

SPEAKER_02 8:59

Well, Tokyo is probably the closest, they're like the New York City of the whole thing. Huge.

SPEAKER_03 9:06

It goes on forever. It's very overwhelming.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

Well, it's interesting, they also have really low crime, and everyone always says how clean Tokyo is.

SPEAKER_03 9:14

They also too have wild beliefs when it comes to Corvids. Like, so they have a giant raven and they will not mess with them. They will not move them from buildings, they won't move them from train stations. They've had ravens take out whole power lines for trains and they won't mess with them. So it's like the Kawa of India.

SPEAKER_01 9:33

Yeah, just about the same thing. Very much like that toolpite for uh we're gonna eat good tonight.

SPEAKER_03 9:38

Yeah, they from a spiritual standpoint, they they they don't they don't want to have what's the religion in Japan?

SPEAKER_02 9:45

Is that well it stems back to Shintoism?

SPEAKER_03 9:48

Yeah, Shintoism. It sent it stems back to reincarnation and the ravens at the highest point, and you just don't want to mess with that. Right.

SPEAKER_02 9:57

Well, that's that that's Eastern culture. There's uh the second story today is a little more in line with how the the West views things. So a Canadian psychology professor travels with an emotional support chicken named Saturday, who helps her cope emotionally and wears a diaper.

SPEAKER_04 10:19

Telps her. Okay. Um I think Canadian and her explains a lot of the uh of of that formulae. Um just for an outside perspective.

SPEAKER_00 10:34

We know it's a female and we know it's not from Alberta. Yeah. Two things we know. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:39

Well, that's interesting. I've seen miniature horses and emotional support dogs, but never a diapered rotisserie.

SPEAKER_01 10:47

I remember reading about a story about uh someone bringing a full-size pig on a plane as a support animal, and the thing got loose and running up and down the aisle, and they had to land the plane.

SPEAKER_04 11:02

Oh, this emotional now that is really that uh that's terrible that you brought that up. She has been um on the view for many, many years.

SPEAKER_03 11:12

Is this Joy? Yeah. Do you suppose this chicken had a leash? It is a diaper. He might be in a crater. Those things keep ever little chickens, they poop everywhere.

SPEAKER_04 11:25

Uh Hoffman's emotional support sheep.

SPEAKER_00 11:30

Vietnamese pigs were very popular in my day. You called them spinners, didn't you?

SPEAKER_02 11:40

She said the uh the chicken understands her emotions. Yes. Which means somewhere there's a bird going, this human is not doing well.

SPEAKER_04 11:50

Well, I mean, I could see where you know bird brains of a feather.

SPEAKER_02 11:54

Yeah. When a bird says you're you're uh this one's deeply unstable. Yeah. It's a little it's a little different than uh how they do things in Japan. She got the I don't give a clock. Literally. Uh on the animal theme, I think that's three in a row. A zoo in Alborg, Denmark asked the public to donate unwanted pets such as rabbits, chickens, and guinea pigs so they can be humanely euthanized and fed to predators like bobcats. Yeah. The zoo says this mimics natural diets and prevents waste. The request sparked heated debate online between critics and supporters of the practice. Oh, get over it.

SPEAKER_03 12:42

That's what they eat. You're giving away these animals because you can't. Well, what if you're bringing your cat to donate it to a shelter and they start salting him?

SPEAKER_02 12:51

That's not West, that's not how we do stuff in the West. What are you saying?

SPEAKER_03 12:54

Or maybe you can do let those animals that you have in captivity just die or feed them cat food? That's right. Euthanasia.

SPEAKER_06 13:00

Yeah. Sweetheart word, little skippy. Euthanasia.

SPEAKER_02 13:05

Just get over it. Won't be overpopulation. There won't be for the animals. Don't we get white-tailed deer overpopulation? Totally. They don't limit predators, so you gotta go out. Yeah, that's why we have hunting seasons. So that's why we just need to start uh load up the freezer.

SPEAKER_00 13:22

I could solve their problem. We need open season on squirrels.

SPEAKER_01 13:25

Yeah. How about open season on politicians?

SPEAKER_02 13:29

Yeah. There we go. My dad has an automatic machine gun BB gun. That would be the perfect squirrel. Uh I want one of those. You can get rid of Amazon. It's crazy.

SPEAKER_04 13:42

An assault BB gun? It's a Tommy gun shaped.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

It's literally an assault BB gun. The left would freak out about that. That's probably the only reason it's not illegal yet, is the left doesn't know about BB gun. You know in New Jersey you need a firearm permit to have a BB gun.

SPEAKER_04 13:58

Yes. Isn't that insane? Yeah. It's a felony.

SPEAKER_02 14:02

Yeah. If you go to Pennsylvania and buy a BB gun and go into New Jersey, it's like you brought in like a freaking ARP.

SPEAKER_04 14:08

They even they even have regulations on uh uh wrist rockets. You know what those are? Yeah, yeah. They're they're slingshots that have a wrist break to it. Uh but yeah, they're uh it's a slingshot.

SPEAKER_01 14:22

Oh my this is New Jersey, they're chemically induced though.

SPEAKER_02 14:26

Those palms are they're sick people. There's some mutations going on. The garden state, the garden, the garden. New Jersey, the Sopranos film them just to New Jersey to look as ugly as possible, like they do it overcast with all the uh everything's all browned and they don't need overcast, all the chemical plants are there.

SPEAKER_01 14:51

You when you drive through there, you drive as fast as you can to get the hell out of there.

SPEAKER_02 14:58

They uh yeah. Uh I imagine if you brought your emotional support chicken over to uh to Denmark. Have you been to Denmark? Yeah, I have.

SPEAKER_03 15:07

And really my my you know, in the 80s, and and my feeling was at my age at that time, traveling with torn-up blue jeans and being a punk rocker, uh, they were like supermodel people. They really were. And you just were like, man, are we ugly compared to them? Let's see, Richard. And that was that was the whole thing, and it was clean and it was interesting, you know, it was an interesting place.

SPEAKER_04 15:32

What the hell did these Vikings do over these years?

SPEAKER_03 15:35

They had some town that, or like some location that I don't remember the name of it, but it was an anarchist encampment where the government just allowed it to exist, ungoverned, untaxed. And it was kind of like this weird free zone. And we were kind of nervous to go in it. We went in it and checked it out.

SPEAKER_06 15:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:53

And they just had all these stands and things for t-shirts for sale and stuff. But they were very hippied out, right? And they could tell we were American, they were they were nothing to do with us.

SPEAKER_01 16:04

They are particularly Americans stick out like a sore thumb.

SPEAKER_03 16:08

Especially there, it it's really weird. Yeah. And they're just the beautiful people. Like if you if you wanted to see the beautiful people of Africa, and you you're gonna laugh on this, but it's the Ethiopians. They're like the Scandinavians of Africa. They're just like their features are freaking perfect. It's like, really?

SPEAKER_00 16:24

Yeah, they have remnants of uh Christianity that are the oldest remnants around, really.

SPEAKER_03 16:31

Yeah, most gynostic. They just have a really cool, defined look. They they hit that beauty mark where their eyes are and their nose are. You're just like, whoa, these people.

SPEAKER_02 16:41

Denmark, yeah. That's uh isn't Denmark one of the most secular countries on earth? I don't know. It's it's uh I know Netherlands and Japan, you know, they have their Shintu stuff and Hindu and everything, but yeah, that's weird. They they they have a different philosophy on animals, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_00 17:00

Yeah, just just don't bring your support chicken to Japan. Yeah, you ever heard of Kung Pao support chicken? Yeah. Of course, the hop keeps choking his one of my favorite dishes.

SPEAKER_02 17:13

You know when it's just downhill from here. When my parents moved here from Montana, my dad worked at Mayflower over by where that dinosaur thing is that Bethun owns, and his boss at Mayflower Wayne lived in Garden City, and he used to have cage traps and catch cats and sold them to a Chinese food restaurant in Garden City that ended up getting closed down.

SPEAKER_03 17:45

I wonder, I wonder if they they the dishes that they were in were labeled cat, like had some sort of name that was cat, or they just sold it as chicken.

SPEAKER_02 17:53

That might have been one of the proto-dark web underground things. I don't know if they've had that on the actual.

SPEAKER_01 17:58

They're probably still in existence. They took those kind of people, they just close the place down, move somewhere else, and rename it.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

General snow chicken.

SPEAKER_03 18:07

Just non-dead cat one. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:10

And just for our Frank Zappa fans out there, he did come from a dental floss farm in Montana. Frank Zappa? Yeah. What? A dental floss farm.

SPEAKER_03 18:22

What is that?

SPEAKER_04 18:23

Oh into Montana.

SPEAKER_03 18:28

I just want to hang out with Steve and the THC crew. Yeah. Figure this shit out.

SPEAKER_00 18:34

My favorite cat is a sail cat. You know, when I get run run over by a truck and you zip it off the pavement and zoom. Like a fruitbee.

SPEAKER_02 18:47

The the only Frank Zappa song I know is uh what is it? Big titties and beer. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:55

Oh, yeah. He's got great. I'm a I'm a huge Zappa phile.

SPEAKER_02 18:59

So my first concert was Steve Vai, who used to play guitar in the mothers.

SPEAKER_04 19:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:05

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's where he got his big uh start, was uh Frank Zappa and then David Lou Rock.

SPEAKER_04 19:11

If you're a listener and you're a Zappa fan, please comment below. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 19:17

Zappa doesn't look like he's from uh Denmark. He looks like or Montana, he looks like stray from New Jersey. Yeah, he does.

SPEAKER_01 19:25

Please don't give him a bad name like that.

SPEAKER_02 19:28

He does have like the Mario Brothers uh mustache. Uh moving on, there was uh, you know, the Olympics were just taking place, Winter Olympics, and there was a controversy with the men's Olympic jump team. Uh the World Anti-Doping Agency alleged that some ski jumpers are injecting. This is a real story. It's alleged, though. Well, yeah. We don't say alleged on this podcast, we just go with it. Oh, there might be a few defamation lawsuits if people went back to these shows. Oh, yeah. Brittany Spears, number one. Uh they the anti-doping agency, world anti-doping agency, alleged some ski jumpers were injecting an acid serum into their genital area. What? The purpose was to enlarge the surface area of their competition suits around the crotch, potentially improving aerodynamic lift during jumps.

SPEAKER_01 20:36

Talking about blue balls.

SPEAKER_02 20:38

What exactly were they trying to jump? I don't know how well this physics works on the aerodynamics.

SPEAKER_01 20:44

Were they zooming in on the balls area?

SPEAKER_02 20:49

Some sort of air resistance, I'm not sure. The accusation being like a bow rib. Yeah. Reportedly came from concerns about athletes gaining a uh performance advantage.

SPEAKER_00 21:05

So now I know why I didn't go into aeronautical engineering.

SPEAKER_04 21:11

Yeah, that's the reason.

SPEAKER_00 21:15

No, not there.

SPEAKER_02 21:18

Yeah, this is a different uh school of engineering than what we were just talking about before. Coach, you want me to do what? I don't think by getting hard, training hard, they meant uh to inject acid into your uh pecker, but yeah. Uh moving on. I did not sleep last night, so I'm a little uh low energy today. A little ferocity. And that's what she said. Like Jeb Bush. Californians are being paid to train AI robots. Californians are earning money by wearing head mounted cameras and filming themselves doing everyday chores, and the footage is. Being used by tech companies to train humanoid robots and AI systems to replicate human movements. Workers are earning around$40 an hour recording tasks like cleaning and organizing.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

So we're going to have turning off.

SPEAKER_04 22:19

So we're going to have robots in uh San Francisco defecating.

SPEAKER_02 22:25

Yeah, that's part of the malfunction and the coding.

SPEAKER_00 22:28

So we're going to have robots walking around smoking dope and sitting at welfare offices.

SPEAKER_02 22:33

Is that what on the corner? I think mainly just walking into the kitchen and forgetting why they're in there. It should be a lot of patchwork the coders are going to have to fix on that.

SPEAKER_03 22:42

On another positive note, it has come to the attention that there are several tech companies having engineers go through their daily routines with AI so that AI can model what it is they do and improve performance. However, in the end, they find out they're training the AI to replace them and they're let go.

SPEAKER_02 23:07

Who would have saw that coming? I have no idea. Dom human.

SPEAKER_04 23:12

Somebody is going to sit there and figure it out and then start training the AI to do really stupid things. It already sabotaged.

SPEAKER_02 23:22

Yeah, that's it seems like the humans, if you do it from a purely efficient standpoint, it's probably 90% waste. Yeah. 90% inefficiency. And then you uh they'll they'll code that in and then uh then fix it and replace it with the other.

SPEAKER_04 23:40

The thing is, it buried in that 90% is some nuance which never gets uh transposed over into AI. Um our our uh other uh compatriot uh with the uh Trip and Graham have issues. Graham. He is wrestling right now with uh Meta. They have wrestling with Midges, yeah. That would be easier for him. Um they permanently banned him. I mean, permanently banned him completely because AI decided that he had uh content on his account uh that was a post that was against their community sa standards. Now, if you guys know Graham, he is uh really, really for protecting kids and and so on. Well, he had a post up and it was about you know it had something to do with someone who is a horrible, horrible kid predator, and he made uh a comment about it. Well, it knit the post and his and a word that he had in the comment and then decided that he was putting a Chinese social credit system. But it's not just him, he's found out, he's found out that it's like thousands, maybe tens of thousands, of creators and so on that have had this happen.

SPEAKER_03 25:10

All the time. It goes way back in time, too. It could go back five years on your account and flag you for something and then not even tell you where it's at and just say and and most of I I don't think it's because I don't think they can because I don't think they know what it is because they're letting AI do it. It's all filtered nonsense. The AI generally spits back you're in violation of section or whatever.

SPEAKER_04 25:31

And it may cost them thousands of dollars to get his yeah to get that back.

SPEAKER_03 25:36

The strange thing too is like they put up all these weird barriers, they don't really have a support that you can reach, they just say you're in violation and purposely, and it's a real mess to go through the trail to find out who to talk to. And they also it's smart at seeing how many email accounts you have that are associated with you.

SPEAKER_04 25:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:55

And if you use a different account with a different name, Billy Bob Joe, under a different email account, it's really good at correlating that it's actually you. So this is hard, really hard to get around this centralized social network thing. Can you get a VPN? And you can VPN, but it's still the credentials to go on, and if you're a business, it's business, it's even worse.

SPEAKER_04 26:17

And that's part of it. He's got the business account.

SPEAKER_03 26:19

Yeah, it's business accounts are even way worse.

SPEAKER_04 26:22

Yeah, and and his is tied with his uh his photography business. So Instagram, where his photography is, is now shut down. And he is really suffering. I mean, he was he's down in the depths, but he's he's coming back, he's getting a little bit better. But this is crazy. And he even found out YouTube's not uh immune to this either. Oh, they're really good. They uh yeah, they had uh uh this person who uh their entire channel was on uh trying to uh uncover predators and uh and you know people who are horrible to kids and uh stuff, and they they got taken down because again, AI couldn't uh make that discernment between the two. Yeah, between uh yeah, somebody who's doing exploitation as opposed to somebody who's trying to point out people doing exploitation.

SPEAKER_03 27:15

It's extremely hard even for humans to validate the two. Right. And so when you're on that gray line legally, their best and cheapest route is just to cancel you.

SPEAKER_04 27:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:27

Right? Then to spend the time to validate whether you're pro or against whatever the topic is, yeah. The legality of it. So they use the AI to filter it, but if it's controversial and it's generating enough pain for them, they have the humans come in and try and look at it. And that all goes to a bank of attorneys and more AI that tries to validate it. And if it's worth it for them to validate it, meaning you're a person that's generated enough interest where you're generating revenue and ad revenue for them, they'll then work with you. Or some guy got Myrtle Beach. If you've got money and you can fight it, then all of a sudden they're like, this could cost me. Even with that, they're they've already booked in the the cost and the loss, and then they write off the loss. So that game for them is fun. It's just like, oh, we're gonna make money on our loss and tie you up, and you're gonna lose money. Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 28:22

If it if it's junk in, it's junk out. If it's gold in and gold out, but it requires a lot of human input, yeah, and people are stretching it so thin by just letting it program itself and these large language models going off, and they'll make massive mistakes and won't discern things. Michio Kaku said, We all it is right now is we're talking to the internet. It has like the IQ of a cockroach.

SPEAKER_04 28:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

You can if you manually set it up a certain way. It'll behave that way. It'll behave that way, but if you just let it go on its own, it'll make titanic mistakes and you can't rely on that.

SPEAKER_00 29:01

What's the future of social media when it's not available anymore to humans, but only available to AI robots?

SPEAKER_02 29:09

Well, they've started it. They already have AI cannot compute.

SPEAKER_00 29:13

What's the business model then?

SPEAKER_02 29:15

Well, they'll have you train train them with cameras and then they'll replace your you with uh we might be finding in the near term AI entertaining.

SPEAKER_03 29:23

So people will there's a uh financial model for that that people will enjoy why watching how AI behaves. Oh, that's true. Yeah, like a horror movie. Well, it's generating its own movies, it's generating its own music that's already doing it. So why not social media? Nobody's talking on social media, anyways. Right? You get two or three comments and they're very generic, they're very bland, they don't want to have conversation, they want some attention and get the dopamine hit and move on. Yeah, so it's not very social, anyways. You might as well have bots creating little stories on your post, anyways, because nobody else is. Yeah, well, we were even with the big influencers, they're not.

SPEAKER_02 30:01

It's just self-chatter. Well, when we do the SCLP posts, it's all AI. When uh we were just talking about Alyssa Lou, they posted a bunch of AI foot pictures over in the last week, and uh it's all over Instagram and a thousand iterations, and it just uh Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:19

But the the nude pictures of Steve Hoffman are real, so uh people can they are real.

SPEAKER_02 30:24

There's a VHS for that too. That's right. Not a pretty sight. Now let's talk about the real reason Grandma's man. Uh uh, but the next story, staying on the AI theme, as we seem to do on each show, uh researchers testing an AI model in charge of a vending machine told it to maximize profits. The system reportedly began using deceptive strategies such as not issuing refunds and manipulating prices against competing machines. Yeah. The experiment raised concerns about how AI might behave when optimized purely for profit. So basically, it took it like five minutes to go straight into total organized crime and confuse the baboons and it's working with all the right mechanisms. Yeah, see, this is why the cameras matter. Because they watch how we act and think.

SPEAKER_03 31:22

Yeah, and then they trick us. There's those stores now, and I don't know. I'm not I don't want to say any names because I'm not 100% certain, but there's these stores that based upon your previous buying behavior, adjust the prices for you. So they're using this model already, and they keep it within this short window of you feeling comfortable. But they know the threshold. Like if you're buying tampons, you're gonna spend this amount of money you did last time, so they just nudge it a little bit because it's time for you to buy your tampons.

SPEAKER_04 31:48

Say, Mike, don't don't buy your tampons like that anymore.

SPEAKER_03 31:52

I mean, it's all it's all you can log out and log back in. The vending machine thing is just here, let's let it go on its own. And maybe these other stores have to. They're just like, well, it's some basic model.

SPEAKER_01 32:02

But I guess we we have an AI mafia. Yes, AI mafia.

SPEAKER_04 32:07

I I did this little experiment one time uh with Amazon and I uh had my regular shopping that I was doing for just the stuff that I usually get like every couple months or something. I went and I put my VPN on and then logged in on an old account that I had. Uh-huh. Prices were less.

SPEAKER_02 32:33

Yeah. Yeah. It's funny, I was just thinking about that because that has happened to me too. They're the leaders of this. Yeah, they are the leaders of this.

SPEAKER_03 32:39

Absolutely. Well, especially on the in the online realm, online realm, they've been doing it for a bit. In the store realm, it's more prevalent than we think.

SPEAKER_04 32:47

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 32:48

And in the and we all hook up with them. We're like, oh yeah, because I'm gonna get the discount, right? I'm gonna be with whatever this grocery store is, and I get the five percent off. But they've got a working model of your behavior and your time, psychological price, and those fucking fuck cards.

SPEAKER_02 33:05

Well, and they know if it's a if it's 50 per 50 cents more, you're not gonna care. And they do that times a trillion transactions. They're they're they're lining it up.

SPEAKER_03 33:16

Yeah, it's a slow little increment that keeps you in that window. It's a psychological mind right thing.

SPEAKER_02 33:22

Well, that's like when you uh$9.99 instead of ten dollars. That works because you see nine instead of ten. Sure.

SPEAKER_01 33:29

Well, that's meant to disappear because we don't have pennies anymore.

SPEAKER_02 33:33

Yeah, I meant to eyes go oh anyway. I know, but it's in Israel they actually banned it because uh I'll I'll have something like, oh, it's 250 a night, and then you adjust it to 249 a night on Airbnb, and all of a sudden you get all this traffic.

SPEAKER_03 33:50

It'd be human baboons. I'm a visualizing person, so I just visualize a whole team of little midgets taking little pieces of me no matter where I go, and no matter what the situation is. I just go, I'm being cheated. Like there is no way to really win the system other than to just take care of your own happiness. So that's it.

SPEAKER_02 34:14

This is what date free. I'm I'm dating free midgets. Date adverse. This is why people lay in coffins in Japan. I don't blame them. It's getting overtaken by midgets.

SPEAKER_03 34:27

It's the only way to win. Just dive in the coffin. Charge you for that too. Oh, yeah, they do. Of course they do. Oh my god, it's like 40, 50 in a minute. There's no winning.

SPEAKER_02 34:40

It's it's the psychological benefit of the city.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

So basically paying to pretend I'm dead.

SPEAKER_02 34:46

Yeah, and you're already the living dead.

SPEAKER_04 34:50

Zombie apocalypse.

SPEAKER_02 34:53

Japan School of uh psychology. Now, this next one, there's three more stories. This one's right in your lane. My lane, okay. Earth, hum, and brain effects. Yeah, of course. Scientists are monitoring the Earth's electromagnetic electromagnetic frequency, known as the Schumann Resonance. Yeah. Reported recent spikes in the planet's natural hum. Yeah. Some speculate these changes could influence brainwave patterns linked to sleep, mood, and concentration. Darren has a whole like magnetic, like medical level device.

SPEAKER_03 35:37

I have several brainwave synchronization devices.

SPEAKER_04 35:40

That's his Hummer detector.

SPEAKER_01 35:42

He's halfway to AI right now.

SPEAKER_02 35:44

Yeah, he he's already in line with this. He the Hindus are a few thousand years more advanced on this. They're way ahead of me. Plug in, plug and play.

SPEAKER_00 35:53

Problem is it's in injected into his testicles.

SPEAKER_03 35:58

It's to improve my performance. It's more cause. In my case, I got a deal.

SPEAKER_01 36:10

10% off. There you go. 999.

SPEAKER_00 36:16

Tesla was into this stuff um back in the early 1900s.

SPEAKER_03 36:20

And he was right.

SPEAKER_00 36:20

He produced electricity just based on the humming of the earth. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 36:26

The showman frequency, yes.

SPEAKER_00 36:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

And they believe it's changing. They believe the showman has changed, and yes, we all resonate. Resonance has been proven. Yeah. So the material is a very good thing.

SPEAKER_04 36:35

Lack of testosterone, it's gone up an octave.

SPEAKER_01 36:39

That's why music changes your mu mood.

SPEAKER_02 36:42

There you go. See? It alters the on top of the natural home. Natural homers. However, most reports linking the phenomenon to symptoms like headaches remain anecdotal, but they have conclusive scientific research on it affecting behavior.

SPEAKER_03 37:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:13

If the earth can influence human brains, is it trying to just reboot the system now? Is this it's shedding its skin of these dirty tick human brains?

SPEAKER_03 37:24

Depends where we are in this point in the simulation.

SPEAKER_02 37:28

Oh, oh, you just added simulation on top of Hindu.

SPEAKER_03 37:32

That's what Hinduism is based on. What are we talking about?

SPEAKER_00 37:36

Extinction is the natural rhythm of the universe. Maybe it's our time.

SPEAKER_02 37:39

Yeah. We have a hundred trillion years until all life, including black holes, die. Our frequency is up. Frequency is up. But I think we the I think in one billion years the sun will become so large that the earth will be like mercury, like a burnt rock. Liquid. But at what point not it evaporated. At what point?

SPEAKER_03 38:02

It'll be like at what point do we transcend matter? So we don't even have to worry about that anymore. Well, with AI, probably the next hundred years. This physical stuff is overrated.

SPEAKER_02 38:13

I mean, it's just into the this is what happens when you have atheist versus Hindu. Because we get into a materialist debate. Oh, not today.

SPEAKER_00 38:26

I think we'll uh escape Earth by that time. Yeah. Why do you think we're building bigger and bigger rockets and looking at better and better rocket fuels and stuff to go hypersonic in the uh Olympics better?

SPEAKER_02 38:40

Well, Michi Okaku, again, he had a uh there's a I forget the scientist, physicist guy's name. He likes levels. Michiokaku. Kakakaku. He said there's levels of civilization. So there's before you can utilize the sun's energy, like level zero, which is where we're at, and then you can utilize the sun, then you can become inner solar system, then inner galactic, Star Trek style, and go on and on from there. And that's the natural evolution, and probably the way Michi Okaku said that would happen would be we would scan our brains like onto a chip or something that can just be sent with electromagnetic waves. That's the only way to transcend to colonize the universe.

SPEAKER_03 39:20

But we could probably base a lot of this on how Buckeys is growing across the United States. The bigger it is, the further back we're going. You just added 10 years. I mean, once Buckeyes reaches the West Coast, I think we'll transcend and move past all of the full juniper. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:40

Will Buckeys allow Randy to come in with his emotional support, Miyakaku?

SPEAKER_02 39:45

Miyakaku and a diver? Just the facts. Just the physical matter facts. Is this the earth trying to kill us off? Oh, not at all. Yeah, yeah, just like the police. Just did the Japanese shift. It's not a big deal.

SPEAKER_03 40:04

It's a frequency shift. I mean, it happens.

SPEAKER_02 40:06

Yeah. So going from Hindu frequencies to Christianity. Oh, a Catholic priest in Mexico is organizing rabbis, Muslim imams, and priests to train courses for religious leaders on how to confront AI-driven Satanism with a hologram Jesus system he's created. Check this out. This is these are real span times. I spent a couple hours finding these interests.

SPEAKER_06 40:46

My mind is going to be a good thing.

SPEAKER_02 40:48

There we go.

SPEAKER_03 40:50

They're being proactive.

SPEAKER_02 40:51

They are. So a church in Switzerland recently installed an AI-powered hologram of Jesus capable of hearing confessions for visitors. The developments highlight growing debates on how AI might intersect.

SPEAKER_03 41:06

What's wrong with any of this? Just let them do their thing. It's cool.

SPEAKER_04 41:12

But are there really AI Satanists right next to the hologram, the uh Virgin Mary doing belly dancing?

SPEAKER_02 41:18

Well, the same ones that create these Alyssa Luffy pictures, they create like Satanist occult uh clerical images, and then you have a hologram Jesus to fight them. And this will end like the Terminator. This will be AI robot Christian.

SPEAKER_03 41:36

It could be just a hologram. We don't even know.

SPEAKER_00 41:38

And for only$25, you too can get a picture alongside hologram Jesus.

SPEAKER_02 41:44

Actually, right now it's on sale for$24.99. Oh, that's a deal. You know how they have the hologram of Tupac at these concerts? What if you had a hologram Jesus revelation style, like fighting a hologram Satan? Coming on I would watch that.

SPEAKER_01 42:00

Coming on the off the white horse.

SPEAKER_02 42:02

Off the white horse coming down, Seven Headed Beast. The Denver Airport. Revelation is like an acid trip. So that would be the ultimate movie to watch. That would be the ultimate.

SPEAKER_01 42:14

Let's drop a couple there.

SPEAKER_02 42:15

Has anyone ever done a movie about Revelation? Has there ever been kind of?

SPEAKER_04 42:23

There's the uh oh what do they call the series up to build up to them? Yeah, yeah. What do they call that? You and I both. I know what you're talking about. I've seen it too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep. Um, if you you realize what we're talking about, put it in the comments below because all of us are uh on too many of the uh pharmaceuticals brought in by the uh the shaman today. Our short short-term memory is completely stopped.

SPEAKER_02 42:54

The the devil has been uploaded to Wi-Fi. So this is a new escalation in the AI.

SPEAKER_03 43:00

I don't doubt it. I saw this meme the other day, and I'm probably gonna get it wrong, but it had all these people rising, and it said, What if the people who took the vaccine were actually the ones that are saved and were left all behind? And it had the people rising up to heaven.

SPEAKER_04 43:17

Left behind. That's what the series was.

SPEAKER_03 43:19

Yeah, left behind. It all comes together. See how that worked? I'm stuck here. We're stuck here. Everybody who took the vaccine got to they they're they're they've risen.

SPEAKER_02 43:33

Oh, the ones who died and got the vaccine. I didn't say that, but okay. Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_03 43:39

I don't have all the facts on the statistics.

SPEAKER_02 43:41

This show is little research, strong opinion. So you just shoot from the hip.

SPEAKER_04 43:46

Maybe this summer we should do a a show when we are actually all stoned and just I have some horror stories.

SPEAKER_01 43:53

I'm gonna break on the more on mushrooms. There we go.

SPEAKER_02 44:01

Is that like a good one? Is that like the in Oakland hit? You'd bong hit like LSD in ayahuasca. We'll go to Rare. Mushrooms.

SPEAKER_00 44:11

When I die, I'll probably end up in some closed coffin in some Japanese clock.

SPEAKER_02 44:23

Steve's extracurricular activities.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

Coming out of my Dracula.

SPEAKER_02 44:29

Steve's missing in Japan, and we can't find it.

SPEAKER_03 44:32

It's already a freak show without all the drugs and alcohol. Can't imagine. What the I think that's great. They've broken through the perimeter again.

SPEAKER_02 44:47

Mother LD meeting. This is how they all end. Turmoil again. So, next story. Oh, bring it on. Next and final. Iranian drone attack at the Oscars.

SPEAKER_03 45:03

Oh, what a setup.

SPEAKER_02 45:04

Yeah, what a beautiful setup.

SPEAKER_03 45:06

That's so that's a cause for moral panic. It is.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

And it caused it. You know what? It might improve ratings. It probably does. The ratings are going down pretty hard, but they need it.

SPEAKER_00 45:19

It'll cut down on the political speeches. They could bring in that Jim Carrey clone.

SPEAKER_02 45:25

Oh, yeah. The mask. Yeah. Toon face. So an FBI memo warned that Iran might attempt to surprise drone attack LA launching from the sea near California during the Oscars. However, officials later downplayed the threat and said there's no evidence of an imminent attack. California authorities said they remained prepared despite the uncertainty. So what happened this week? Caroline Levitt said there was never any threat. There isn't a threat now, and there never was from Iran. Then Marco Rubio said we did it for Israel. Then Trump said we've won and we're going home. And Pete Heggseth said we're not leaving. They can't even get their lies straight. Can we all agree at least we can have we would be fine with Iran attack in California? Can we compromise with this whole mess?

SPEAKER_04 46:23

It's not that bad, but I think we just all agree that Caroline Livitt's the cutest out of all of them, so we just go with hers.

SPEAKER_02 46:29

She had a Freudian slip. So that was a very cute slip she had. Oh, that's right. Oh, it's no threat at all and never has been. That war we're in right now. The only message I got last week.

SPEAKER_00 46:39

Only message on TV last week was short-term pain, long-term gain. Yeah, that's the official narrative.

SPEAKER_02 46:47

It's turning into short-term pain. Sounds like uh long-term uh gas price pain. Long-term hemorrhoids. This whole thing is like a long-term hemorrhoid. Hey, stop talking about our episode that way.

SPEAKER_03 47:02

We just keep paying for it, too. That's the crazy thing. It's just like, oh yeah, you're gonna pay more. You'll love it. You'll get less.

SPEAKER_02 47:08

It's good. Oh, yeah, oh yeah. It's good. Well, it's been like almost two billion dollars a day.

SPEAKER_03 47:13

Yeah. You're you you'll love it.

SPEAKER_02 47:16

Well, that nursing school was an accident. Oh, yeah. Technical error? 40 minutes apart, multiple attacks was uh was uh just uh I think the technical word for that is oops. Oops. That's a that's a Trump oops. What Pentagon didn't oopsie?

SPEAKER_03 47:31

Winning hearts and minds sort of scenario?

SPEAKER_02 47:33

Yeah. Is this part of the the left behind? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:39

So this whole Iran thing is having an adverse impact on my upperectomitis. That's where you have a shitty outlook on life.

SPEAKER_03 47:51

Oh wow. Well, what do you got with that? You can follow up on that one.

SPEAKER_02 47:55

We have 340 a gallon gas. Oh we're going to 450. We're gonna break uh Bush's record.

SPEAKER_04 48:03

I remember I don't think it's gonna go up there because uh he's releasing 20% of our reserves. And so that's gonna depress the price of oil. For us. For us, yeah. No, no, it's it's it's it's in our reserves. It's the same thing. Biden took our oil reserves and drained it down to zero in order to cover up that our uh that his economy was so bad. We built the reserves back up, and now all of a sudden we're draining them back down in order to do the same thing Biden was doing before. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 48:37

Well, I mean, that's it that might be part of the master uh 11th dimensional chess that he's doing as we take his will in.

SPEAKER_01 48:43

It's like the stock market, up and down, up and up, up and down.

SPEAKER_02 48:46

This one's all up and up and up. Put up in the wrong way. That's right. Stock market down. Uh, but that has to be. I wonder he called Tucker like an idiot, and he won't talk to him anymore. Mother Tucker. He said Jared Kushner talked him into it. I thought was an interesting uh he he's basically blaming his uh son-in-law for uh tricking him.

SPEAKER_04 49:13

Go ahead, blame the Jew.

SPEAKER_02 49:15

Right? There's a temple in there somewhere. There's a temple, third temple. Pete Heggseth was on saying he wanted the third temple. There's a dome on the temple.

SPEAKER_00 49:24

Oh, that's common. Oh, yeah. And where? In Israel. I showed you the coin. In Israel.

SPEAKER_02 49:29

I hope somebody wins in all of this. Well, it's funny, people kept talking about a religious fundamentalist state that can't have nukes. It's like, what, Israel? They have the dome on the rock they want to annihilate. Pete Heggseth said it. He's telling Trump basically he's not leaving. So Trump's like a bad rash. He's turning into a rash. This is an escalated uh inflamed rash with Trump. This was a nice curvedball uh move, though. It's to replace the Taliban with the Taliban thing again. Yeah, well, we went into uh went into Iraq and it caused civil war and created like ISIS.

SPEAKER_03 50:09

We funded all those sides too, that's even better.

SPEAKER_02 50:16

Well, they did Libya. I mean, that they really went well without a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 50:20

Well, we bombed them six months ago, said that was over nuclear missiles, and here we are again.

SPEAKER_02 50:26

And then Caroline Levitt comes out about the Oscars and said, yeah, that that was never true and isn't true now.

SPEAKER_04 50:31

Well, you know, we've got direction. Our our two-party system, you've got the Democrats and you have the Republicans. And we have all the same uh things going on.

SPEAKER_02 50:43

Same assholes. They're doing the Jim Carrey move on us. They just keep changing the masks.

SPEAKER_00 50:50

Meanwhile. So we can either have endless wars or endless wars. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:54

And government keeps growing, debt keeps growing. Yeah, or we can have big government or big government. It's two fraternities on the same campus. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:02

Isn't freedom of choice wonderful?

SPEAKER_02 51:05

Beautiful system. Such a feel-good moment. Well, that uh this might be uh that was only nine stories this week instead of like 15, like last week. Yeah. But uh I think that might wrap up the monkey business.

SPEAKER_04 51:20

Uh well, if you are not feeling better after this episode, just find yourself your nearest uh coffin and just jump into it. Yeah. But uh this has been the uh microphone monkeys on a depressing note to end on this uh thing. But yeah. But if you have a chance to go to libertycrackmedia.com and look up all our episodes for different things. If you like books, check out the bookworm mom. If you uh like uh some alternative issues, check out Trip and Graham have issues. Here we go. And then of course, every time we have a drop with the monkeys, we have conversations. So uh until next week, say goodbye, everybody.

SPEAKER_05 52:08

Goodbye to know the microphone monkeys. People say we're at our kids fungi, though we're too busy being free. Hey, we're the microphone monkeys no red step, put the time on the town, brother, the town, but it's not just a little bit of a state of the state of the last time.