Premiere Mobile Edition of Microphone Monkeys

This edition has the producer, Tripp, on assignment in North Georgia and the rest of the crew back home in the low country.  This episode features some of the regular gags along with some truly disgusting subjects not suitable for listening while eating....

Rebel Rabbit infused seltzers.  Get a free Microphone Monkeys button at the Inlet Dispensary in Murrell's Inlet.

Check out the Tripp (and Graham) has Issues podcast!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 1:04

So right, hey guys, this is Microphone Monkeys, and today we're doing the Mobile Monkey Edition. Yay!

SPEAKER_03 1:49

We are doing the D script uh uh mobile edition because we'll he he had to bring some truckload of something to another state, and it it's all not very clear what he's up to, but uh he's passing he's passing that marijuana along.

SPEAKER_05 2:07

He crossed the border. I have my rebel my truckload of rebel rabbit with me.

SPEAKER_03 2:14

So uh and some young Thai girls. I'm not sure what happened.

SPEAKER_02 2:18

Can you do that? Can you travel across the border with the rebel rabbit?

SPEAKER_05 2:23

Yeah, everything's North Carolina is fine. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:27

Um check the laws. What laws? Well, it seems like these laws. Seems like the blue states where weed's legal, they they might actually arrest you for having uh some sort of hemp drink. Georgia's kind of confused.

SPEAKER_05 2:46

Well, I'm here with family, so I need something.

SPEAKER_03 2:50

Yeah, that's that's his cover story.

SPEAKER_04 2:52

Yeah, yeah, I understand that one.

SPEAKER_03 2:54

Well, today we do not have Stone Cold Steve Hoffman. There may be technical difficulties, but uh the this is a laptop brand new app descript system that we had to do some test runs with. So uh uh but we have third eye Atherton. Hello? It's not I I usually do the I signals in person to you know we're just seeing sound waves on this one. Uh we have Dark Web Detmering, our executive producer slash interstate uh you know businessman.

SPEAKER_05 3:37

Interstate felon, yeah. Interstate felon.

SPEAKER_03 3:43

Just pay your taxes. Yeah, he had uh to escape his old embassy in Thailand, and now he's going state to state like Kenchimer. That's right. And we have Mafia Mike. Back on the news again. Back on and today I got there's actually quite a few stories today. It helps when I can just lay in bed and look for my phone instead of drive to North Myrtle Beach. Uh I didn't have to do Chat GPT while driving this time. Awesome. So we have micro drones shooting down insects, Russian warlocks and clairvoyance exploiting fuel shortages, hairy croissants, uh, air force engineers cutting down flock cameras, uh, roommates getting their mouths owned shut, robot weddings, Taco Bell diarrhea, diarrhea uh controversy, and upstate New York humanoid robot teachers. So we we have quite a wide array of uh news stories today.

SPEAKER_02 5:00

It's explosive diarrhea, right? It's not explosive, yeah, yeah, with parasites, so uh parasitic explosive diarrhea.

SPEAKER_03 5:10

Yeah. When there's paras shitty parasites flying around, that's that's not good.

SPEAKER_04 5:16

Hey, we got the lasers to shoot them down.

SPEAKER_03 5:20

Wait, didn't we just have we'll get the sharks with laser beams? Well, we'll get used to this this uh sound wave descript thing. This is our first time, so we're we're getting in the motion of it.

SPEAKER_05 5:33

My caution to everybody is if you see a straight line on the board for all four of us, jump in because dead air is dead.

SPEAKER_02 5:41

Yeah. So so these these little drones that fly around I let me guess here a little bit on the insect killers. Are they shooting salt?

SPEAKER_04 5:54

Why why would they be shooting salt?

SPEAKER_02 5:57

Because that's you know, like they blast the insects with salt to kill them.

SPEAKER_03 6:02

Well, see, I think the uh it's ultrasonic pulses. Ultrasonic pulses.

SPEAKER_02 6:09

Hey, that's gotta be good for you.

SPEAKER_03 6:10

Uh, those migraine sufferers will love that. Send in the swarm of those. Maybe it loosens up the uh brain plaque or something. Yeah, come here and blast my plaque. Yeah, I need some Doritos with that. Well, it says tech startup is working on micro drones capable of annihilating flying insect insects like mosquitoes by shooting them in mid-air. Engineers in Tornyall, that has to be in the South, an American startup backed by Y Combinator, have been uh working on AI-powered micro drones that can bring down the cost of mosquito eradication by a hundred times. Swarms of these tiny drones could hunt and shoot down mosquitoes in urban spaces, and instead of using chemicals and more uh expensive and hazardous control solutions. And it said Alex Toe Saint, one of the founders of Torn Yul, uh posted a video showing the company's first air-to-air kill where a small drone is pursuing and shooting down a moth in a control test area. Obviously, the moth is larger and not a mosquito, but this is a very big step towards developing drone capability. He declared his goal is to develop 40 gram drones that rely on smartphone microphones, ultrasonic sensors, and custom software to track and target insects. This could take a scary turn. Uh, the drones are designed to send out ultrasonic pulses and listen for echoes with an array of microphones because mosquito wings was it like bats.

SPEAKER_05 8:00

Yeah, the the unintended consequences of this whole thing is what gets to me. Because okay, we start killing off all of our small insects, and then that means that we start starving the birds, and then it just seems like it's just why why I mean I don't think we have yeah, I don't think we have that much problems with the uh with the insects, small insects of the world to actually just kill the mosquitoes, I'll be happy with that.

SPEAKER_02 8:32

Yeah, I mean forests, you know, yeah, you know what you're getting at is totally true because it's all interconnected, but think about it this way if the AI is smart enough to understand population, it hits a percentage of that population to keep the rest healthy and going, right? If it's smart enough to figure that out, but another weirdo thing here too is these little swarm bots flying around, their cameras and microphones. Do you think they're not paying attention to you?

SPEAKER_03 9:00

Yeah, yeah, we're worried about flying and snap next. There's an array of a spy drone.

SPEAKER_05 9:08

That's right. Well, and there was a they'll get in Randy's bedroom and get all sorts of evil stuff that comes out of there. I mean, that's gonna be scary.

SPEAKER_02 9:19

I don't even want to know.

SPEAKER_03 9:26

There was a Black Mirror episode where they had these like mini insect drones that could like smell or track human DNA and they would just find people and hunt them down and kill them.

SPEAKER_02 9:40

And you can inoculate them with whatever you want to do.

SPEAKER_05 9:43

Yeah, I mean sci-fi movie. That it reminds me of uh when we were at a uh state meeting and one of our fellows there was really having a uh a nasal assault from somebody else who is there with their perfume talk about smells.

SPEAKER_03 10:06

I don't want to name it. We have some strange characters that uh yeah. I don't think I even know this story.

SPEAKER_05 10:12

Oh, well, it was uh it was actually our friend Lee that was getting his nasal passages assaulted, but I don't want to I don't want to mention by whom, but he just could not take the the amount of perfume from this person.

SPEAKER_03 10:28

Incriminated there's a lot of uh strange people who wandered into our meetings, so oh true, including with various smells.

SPEAKER_02 10:38

Uh yeah. Well, this smells of Bill Gates to me. Well, the whole thing smells of like a Bill Gates funded sort of does sound like a Bill Gates population control.

SPEAKER_03 10:47

Well, listen to this. It says because mosquito wings create a distinct Doppler sound signature, the drones can tell mosquitoes apart from other insects, and they hope one day to swarm these micro drones to eliminate mosquitoes from whole urban areas, with 10 of them capable of clearing one square kilometer of winged bloodsuckers. So it is this is one of those things when you interfere with the voluntary adaptive way of nature, you get unintended consequences just like you do in the economy. And there's probably a fine line with that. But that's uh that's an interesting slash, maybe that might be one of the most horrifying uh tech stories we've talked about, if you think about the uh implications of that. Yeah, very true.

SPEAKER_02 11:34

It's got a ripple effect. That's for sure.

SPEAKER_03 11:37

Well, and if if you can have micro drones that are the size of like a mosquito, that's like the nightmare of the government recording you in your room. It's like they don't even have to bug you or try to hack into anything through your whole house.

SPEAKER_02 11:52

Dude, they've they've been talking, they've been modifying cockroaches for a long time and controlling them, right? So, and again, goes back to is like whatever they're telling us, whatever we're reading, their programs probably have something that's 20% at least better. So these little micro insect things, they've been doing that a lot for a long time for spying and for probably killing people, like instant heart attack, stroke, all the fun stuff. Oh, interesting.

SPEAKER_03 12:17

Well, think about it a mosquito can suck your blood. You could have a little micro one that injects poison into you. Far-fetched thing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 12:27

Well, now I gotta walk around in a netted suit.

SPEAKER_02 12:31

They seem to like pigeons too. I and the closeness between us and pigeons goes back a long, long, long time. So they're easy, malleable, right? So I can attach all these devices to them and modify them. Those pigeons will be killing you in about five years.

SPEAKER_04 12:49

Killer pigeons, it'd be uh the birds all over again. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:55

Hitchcock birds. Uh moving on, we do have quite a few stories today. Russian warlocks and clairvoyance are exploiting historic fuel shortage in Russia. Uh, warlocks and clairvoyants, they're they're speaking of them as if these are real. Uh are taking advantage of desperate motors.

SPEAKER_04 13:17

Is that their excuse for uh uh fuel shortage over there? I thought that was those are motorcycle gangs. You're talking about literal warlocks and so on. Yeah, making that more believable than the president and his little war over there.

SPEAKER_05 13:39

The warlocks here are they're a motorcycle gang. That's why when I ri originally heard the story, that's what I thought it was. It's a motorcycle gang type of thing over there, but you're talking about witches and warlock kind of things?

SPEAKER_03 13:55

Witches, clairvoyants, warlocks. Well, I guess uh I didn't know the warlocks. I know there's uh uh the Grand Strand is kind of uh, I guess like Hell's Angels territory on the talk speaking of biker gangs, uh, but there have been known to have pagans dip in here and there through Myrtle Beach. And uh I've heard stories of peg and hell's angels gunfights in uh surfside beach. But uh these are a different warlock. These are the type of warlocks there there was this famous thing in the Salem Woods trials where they accused this 80-year-old guy of being a warlock and they squished him with stones because he wouldn't admit to being a warlock, and if he admitted it, they were gonna hang him and take all his property, and his kids weren't gonna get his stuff. So he just got squished for three days and died. But his kids were gonna get the kids.

SPEAKER_01 14:47

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 14:49

I love it when Rome reaches out like that.

SPEAKER_03 14:52

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Well when you get the you you let these wild ass Puritans do whatever they want. See, people think it's all uh, you know, like Thanksgiving and early settlements, and they're you know, imprisoning five year olds.

SPEAKER_05 15:08

What do these warlocks and so on in in Russia, what what do they do to exploit the fuel problems there?

SPEAKER_03 15:17

Well, what it's saying because they're facing un an unprecedented fuel crisis, uh waiting to refuel at sky-high prices, and Ukraine hitting oil refineries, etc., the situation is unlikely to change soon. But the Russian news media reported that an increased number of magicians, clairvoyants, witches, and warlocks are taking to social media to promote all kinds of services, including lowering a vehicle's consumption to changing standard fuel into premium fuel through occult rituals.

SPEAKER_04 15:56

Yeah. This world is a mess. These people have got no sense in the head.

SPEAKER_05 16:03

Well, I wish they would come over to this country and wave their magic wand over my truck and fix the brakes. Did you see?

SPEAKER_04 16:11

Did you see the price of gas went up 42 cents in one day? That's because we're winning. We're winning. That's why. Well, we're winning, though. Yeah. Trump thinks we're winning. We're no, he's winning. He's winning. Well, this is the thing.

SPEAKER_05 16:28

If you think it's because of a lack of oil, you're insane because we released when we the Hormuz was opened thousands and thousands and tens of thousands of gallons of unrefined oil. So this is just all because of future speculation. Has nothing to do with the actual price of the tank of oil or actually what is literally going on in the war out there. It's just people's feels that are reported.

SPEAKER_02 16:58

They price this in, they price this in. So every time he starts and ends it, it goes up and down like a yo-yo, and you're making money out.

SPEAKER_03 17:08

Well, that's the thing, because all the uh the oil here is is priced internationally. Uh he might maybe his next step might be to nationalize certain oil things. We'll see between the midterms how's where's the drill baby drill?

SPEAKER_04 17:23

What happened to that? We've been hearing that for eight years.

SPEAKER_03 17:27

We are drilling. Yeah, it's just the it's just like the Venezuela thing, the companies you know price it internationally. So when this kind of stuff blows up, it kind of gets a little haywire. But there is another option. Clairvoyance can increase fuel consumption. Uh, they claim it may be due to a car malfunction, but a supposed hex, negative energy and foreign objects that someone may have left in the car could remove these impurities, including checking the engine, visiting a car repair shop. Customers are encouraged to perform rituals to lower their car's fuel consumption, rituals that these masters of the occult can prepare. So this is this sounds like this would go wild in the US. This would be people would run with this shit.

SPEAKER_04 18:16

Hey, if he while he's doing, why don't he ritual me a new engine for the truck?

SPEAKER_03 18:22

Yeah, ritualize a guy to repair your tire. Yeah. Exactly. It does also offer, it says a witch told a client that a curse had been cast on their car's fuel tank, causing it to burn through fuel faster, and they offered to spiritually lift the curse for the moderate price of 16,000 rubles.

SPEAKER_02 18:47

So that's pretty cool. And I mean, speaking of imperial empiricalism, uh watch the latest couple of episodes of the Wi-Files. You'll see some interesting stuff about uh Russians find it. Okay, yes, and and what they're actually doing, and how the CIA took that over, and uh there's some fun facts in there.

SPEAKER_03 19:10

Empirically I about the Wi-Files have a look at the gateway experience, the Monroe Institute.

SPEAKER_02 19:23

Do a little background on the Monroe Institute when you have some time. It's really fascinating.

SPEAKER_03 19:29

See, I I'm completely unfamiliar, and you're planting a lot of things.

SPEAKER_02 19:32

I'm just throwing it out there and planting viruses for you.

SPEAKER_03 19:36

Mind virus. The why but our conspiracy friend Bill, who we have to do a weekend podcast with, we'll have to set that up soon. And Will and Darren have been mentioning these Y-Files, and I have not been able to.

SPEAKER_02 19:50

Why files is gate, great. The gateway experience is freaking phenomenal. What came out of that from the U.S. military, amongst other sources, including the Russians. AJ the horse.

SPEAKER_05 20:03

Yeah, AJ, the host of the Y Files, is absolutely excellent entertainer, and then his uh his use of Heckelfish as you know, entertainment with it, is just you it really is. It's a it's it's a delightful thing to watch. Sounds like the show of the X-Files.

SPEAKER_02 20:24

Randy, when you're ready to use the mind machine over here, you'll be able to kind of experience the gateway experience.

SPEAKER_03 20:32

Darren has the uh the mind immersion helmet that that puts you into uh another dimension. I uh we'll have to we'll we'll do the surfing and stuff and get all prepped, and then uh maybe we can do the mind machine isolation tank. Uh no one knows all the shenanigans. They're talking about my room. Darren has like a freaking uh a whole whole lab set up in uh in his uh Hindu unit. Hindu unit. Yeah. But can can this guy perform esoteric practices to convert AI-92 gasoline into AI 100? Highly unlikely. I I think now. That's where the clairvoyance comes in.

SPEAKER_05 21:24

If you have enough rubles, you couldn't.

SPEAKER_02 21:26

Clairvoyance means he sees, it just means he sees. That's all clairvoyance means. Oh, like Nostradamus, like you see into the future. What do you think? He's seeing your gas tank being empty.

SPEAKER_03 21:39

I mean, God, these people could make a fortune here, especially in the south. Holy. This sounds like all the tarot card places that are already here doing the uh clairvoyance and warlock rituals.

SPEAKER_04 21:54

I got a pack of tarot cards here. I'll bring them to the I'll bring them over.

SPEAKER_03 22:00

Gas went up 40 cents. Get the Ouija board. Get the Ouija board. Let me check my mood ring.

SPEAKER_04 22:08

My mood ring's turning red, blood red.

SPEAKER_02 22:12

Gaia.com now has the tarot card reading every day if you want to do it with their AI. I've never done that.

SPEAKER_03 22:19

It's fun. You know, one of the great fun little experimental things since we've been golfing and going to strip clubs, and we're doing beach trips and gun shooting and stuff. We need to go to like a palm reader or one of these tarot card like readers.

SPEAKER_04 22:36

Be careful with the that'd be a scary thought.

SPEAKER_03 22:40

Be careful.

SPEAKER_04 22:41

You might find out the true meaning of me.

SPEAKER_02 22:43

Yeah, like with the with the mediums, you gotta do your homework. That's don't take that lightly. Do your homework.

SPEAKER_05 22:51

Well what w what about the palm reader?

SPEAKER_02 22:56

I mean, what what is it? Well, I mean, you know where I can. I'm very energy and frequency driven, and I think you need to be careful with with people. Yeah. You know, you gotta you gotta you gotta work with the right people to do that. And there's all sorts of interesting things you could do. Like you can do regressions, right? That's a step beyond going to a medium and a taracard reading, and and that stuff gets deep. There's a regression. A regression in theory is going back about past life regressions, but it also is going back through cyclic memory, right? And it surfaces stuff out of your conscious mind and your subconscious mind. Okay. And you know, there's there's a lot going on within your brain that we don't know about fully yet. And you put any hand of somebody else, you gotta be super cautious with that stuff.

SPEAKER_03 23:50

Have you guys seen this Oz Perlman guy where he like predicts people's bank card numbers and pen numbers and stuff? No. See, they there we there's so much in our crazy ass city we live in here, of uh the illustrious city of Myrtle Beach, that uh has been left unturned. But one thing laws like the what?

SPEAKER_02 24:15

The Fong Laws. Oh, are we talking about surfside?

SPEAKER_03 24:20

Yeah, they're on Well, I I will say transitioning, because I do have about ten stories today, but there is a Thai bakery that sparked controversy with risque hairy croissants. So the the this popular bakery is in Pataya, Thailand. It has been getting a lot of attention for its hairy croissant menu edition.

SPEAKER_04 24:55

Thailand people aren't even hairy. Where are they getting the hair from?

SPEAKER_03 25:01

Yeah, that's a great point. Are they are they importing it from well, they're South Asians, they might be looking at the or they're shaving it off a pig's back or something.

SPEAKER_04 25:09

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

What's the sell sales point here? Like, there's gotta be a point to this. Like, what are we missing?

SPEAKER_03 25:17

What they were saying is croissants have been a staple French cuisine for centuries, but never really considered controversial until this Thai bakery is looking to change that with its risque hairy croissants. And if I could show this picture, it literally looks like pee's attached to the cream on a that sounds so delicious.

SPEAKER_04 25:40

Oh boy. That sounds yummy. Got a little flavor with that too.

SPEAKER_05 25:46

Maybe have some. Something smells a little fisting ground. Maybe drink a little Japanese uh foot foot wash afterwards, you know, with foot juice to put it down.

SPEAKER_03 26:00

Listen, if I could get Alyssa Lou.

SPEAKER_04 26:02

So they got some old hairy lady in the back shaving her snack. Oh, good lord.

SPEAKER_03 26:09

It looks like it. What kind of freaking sardine croissant is this? Uh it says Arthit Crom Sawat, the owner of Pataya's popular Saiwan bakehouse, told Bangkok Post the unique croissant has become the talk of the town, inspired by the hairy cake. Now that's another tangent I don't think they go into. We'll have to look that up. The croissants, however, went viral internationally after being featured in French media outlet Prisme, topped with hair-like fat choy. So it must be some natural thing. Yeah. Now it's way less cool. Why would they have a cake when they could have just had a pie?

SPEAKER_02 26:57

Oh hairy pie.

SPEAKER_04 26:58

They have a pie. Hair pie. Hair pie.

SPEAKER_03 27:03

Yeah. The hairy tie poon tang pie croissant. Yeah, the hairy tie pie.

SPEAKER_05 27:09

Maybe maybe we should have a warning for the people. We should have a warning for people not to be uh eating or think about eating prior to listening to this podcast.

SPEAKER_04 27:22

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:27

Yeah. What a little side of STD with Mike Crissant uh and fish juice. Uh that's another thing we've left untouched in Myrtle Beach is all these Asian massage parlors, especially in North Myrtle. That's another trip we haven't taken yet. Well, we we have a laundry list of adventures to do.

SPEAKER_02 27:45

I'm gonna skip that one. I just yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:48

Oh later. I think they are all by that uh North Myrtle strip club, the dollhouse. Sure. Yeah. But it says the black edible algae, commonly used in Asian cuisine, is put on these hairy croissants and has sparked much debate. Some consider them poor taste and an uncanny resemblance of the fat choy to trimmed pubic hair, which is exactly what it looks like. While others appreciate the bakery for its originality. So all publicity is good publicity.

SPEAKER_05 28:25

Others appreciate the origin. Oh good lord. I I'm sorry. I mean, I like originality, but then there's you know that then there's just rolling a limit.

SPEAKER_03 28:38

Yeah, this is a good thing. This could this does look like it could be a menu item at the Masters Club. The uh Harry Christmas is definitely something.

SPEAKER_05 28:48

But I thought that was outside stuff. This is an Asian novelty. Yeah, obviously. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:58

This is part of understanding other cultures well. Uh this looks yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:04

Well we eat anything.

SPEAKER_03 29:06

Yeah. Yeah, I know. There's dogs, there's they cut up dolphins in Japan. Now we have hairy croissants.

SPEAKER_04 29:12

But too many of them, that's why. There's not enough food to go around over there.

SPEAKER_03 29:17

Yeah, they're they're getting inventive with it.

SPEAKER_05 29:20

Uh I know Randy's gonna be talking about explosive diarrhea here sometime soon. I know it's coming up.

SPEAKER_03 29:27

Yeah. Uh our next story, this is more of a uh a slightly political story. The an Air Force engineer is accused of cutting down 13 police cameras, saying they're unconstitutional. The first of them. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:46

I sent them over there to cut them suckers down.

SPEAKER_03 29:50

Yeah, they seem to be wearing big chains and were very Italian-looking. It's very strange.

SPEAKER_04 29:57

Is this in the the the the service men are just cover-ups?

SPEAKER_02 30:04

Is this in honor of Lindsey Graham's passing?

SPEAKER_03 30:07

It may be. I I uh this may be a ceremonial way to counter all the uh the tyranny that nice gentleman shared with our country for 30 years. Uh there's a meme. It's the first one. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_05 30:23

I said there's a meme going on. Go on. Go, go, go, go. Oh, about Lindsay Graham? No, no, no. I'm just gonna end what you're gonna say. No, I think it's a good idea.

SPEAKER_03 30:37

I made a very cool meme, but you know, it's not a different thing.

SPEAKER_04 30:39

Yeah, what's the meme about?

SPEAKER_05 30:41

You're talking about jail with that meme. The meme that I was gonna talk about was that there's one that's going around saying, do not uh buy these $12 um laser pointers and point them at flock cameras because it could damage the things. You know, it's tongue in cheek, but uh yeah, it's been real popular lately.

SPEAKER_03 31:04

Well, and it's as Jennifer uh Breckenshin, I think is her last name. She's yeah, spearheaded this in South Carolina about tracking all the flock cameras and organizing everyone around uh uh you know opposing them, and where we've actually been getting involved. We have a resolution we did at the state, we're doing a Nori County one. But what he did first, this guy, Jerry Rhina, he the first thing he did was the first camera was simply pointed the wrong way. That's how this started. And it says in early April 2025, Jerry Reina, leader of a local neighborhood watch in Harbor View area of Suffolk, Virginia, noticed that one of their six flock cameras in their community had been turned away from the road where it had been installed to monitor, according to testimony at a preliminary hearing. And the police sergeant who helps oversee the city's camera program soon found another aimed into a wooden line. By summer, entire poles were down. Some cameras were thrown from the Hampton Roads Parkway onto the Interstate 664 below, where they shattered the pavement, the sergeant testified, and the tampering continued for six months. Then in October, they arrested Jeffrey Sovin, 41, an engineer and mechanic in the Air Force, according to his defense attorney. He faces 13 felony counts of destruction of property, six counts of petty larceny, six counts of possession of burglary tools tied to 13 flock cameras that were damaged between April and October. And he's uh pled not guilty. It says the local vandalism case would normally stay local, but this has become a national boiling point over the ever-burgeoning fight of uh automated license plate readers, and privacy advocates across the country have donated more than 15,000 to his uh legal defense.

SPEAKER_01 33:04

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 33:04

But uh this is an interesting when you start this like North Korean police state, there's no due process, no warrants, no probable cause, and you're just mass surveilling everyone scanning their cars, scanning for crimes, doing all of this uh you know, surveillance behavior. Uh, you're going to get it. I'm happy there's been so much opposition to this. Yeah. Uh same hero. Despite some some you know, defending the morale.

SPEAKER_04 33:35

But it never stops. It never stops.

SPEAKER_03 33:38

Yeah. Yeah. Well, and there's so much uh grant money and lobbying and everything else to pay for these companies to install them and have contracts with municipalities and states.

SPEAKER_04 33:52

And they don't have the money to put them up.

SPEAKER_03 33:55

Yeah. And this is so unjustified. I know I think Surfside Beach PD, Conway, Myrtle Beach, uh, and different parts of Ori County have started putting up.

SPEAKER_04 34:08

Conway has a good bunch of them up by lows.

SPEAKER_02 34:12

Surprised not covered in them the way they're going.

SPEAKER_04 34:15

You're out there feeding the geese. I see you.

SPEAKER_03 34:18

Man, surfside's been going crazy lately.

SPEAKER_04 34:20

Darren's gonna go there with a baseball back and take out the geese. I can see it now. Forget the feeding.

SPEAKER_03 34:27

Yeah, well, Darren is usually Darren's usually the highly peaceful, emotionally controlled one, but you start regulating birds and then throwing up flaw cameras, things might get dangerous. Uh there may be some uh supernatural violence and uh it would be fun to visit their council meeting again and just drop in.

SPEAKER_02 34:53

You know, we love to see us last.

SPEAKER_04 34:56

Why don't we all go to the next council meeting raise hell?

SPEAKER_03 35:00

Yeah, oh god. Well, because we went for Ken Scheimer's thing and then they ended up backing off. Yeah, they could have backed off. Yeah, well, and one of our uh uh LP friends, who I won't name, and it's still I don't know how much he wants known publicly about this, but he got arrested and or not arrested, but charged with disorderly conduct for uh uh just saying something when someone was screwing with uh with them on the pier. And they sent three police officers and did a disorderly conduct for like one word he said. Then they're banning bird regulation things and how you can feed birds. I had uh uh my mom has this pretty big cleaning business, and one of her workers got uh ticketed for speeding one mile over the speed limit a few years ago.

SPEAKER_02 35:50

Surfside's always been super anal and up everyone's like like didn't they just oh so they have the no feeding bird ordinance, and now they're putting another thing out there. What is it, Randy? We couldn't even figure it out. It was so legally what is it?

SPEAKER_03 36:06

Yeah, they're they're trying to modify it to make it more draconian.

SPEAKER_02 36:09

The the wording it made no sense. Uh yeah, they're not even know what they're doing.

SPEAKER_03 36:16

Yeah, it's it's some shenanigans, and who knows what what's behind that either.

SPEAKER_02 36:21

Exactly. Some sort of revenue drive for donuts. We we showed up there, they looked at us like we were a pack of bikers when we showed up there.

SPEAKER_03 36:29

Oh, yeah. Oh, because no one they have it in like a little shed, their their town council thing. And uh they they're used to getting away with murder. Surfside's the worst. They're gonna end up being a big uh well, we're gonna end up there quite a bit, I think.

SPEAKER_05 36:44

Probably, but I think they have lockdammers up at Surfside just so they can make sure that they can get great photos of geriatrics driving um their uh golf carts and interfering with uh traffic. That's all it's for.

SPEAKER_03 37:02

I will say the one one thing as a property manager, if ever anyone's committing mass crimes, once you hit Surfside Beach in Garden City, people drive golf carts on 17 business. They drive golf carts on the house.

SPEAKER_04 37:18

It's freaking crazy. Especially during bike week.

SPEAKER_03 37:21

Oh yeah, during this last July 4th, it took like an hour.

SPEAKER_04 37:27

And just watch the bikes go by.

SPEAKER_03 37:30

Yeah, well, and on Atlantic Avenue, they have a whole golf cart path, and no one uses it. They just block all the whole Atlantic Avenue. Yeah, surfside's a problem. We're gonna we're gonna start cracking down on Surfside. Uh, but it it said on this uh block cameras are built as automated license plate readers, solar-powered cameras that photograph every plate that passes and store the images by that solar panel.

SPEAKER_04 37:57

Yeah, and they use their cameras that don't have that solar panel, though those aren't block cameras. I'm not sure what those are though.

SPEAKER_03 38:07

Well, and they have like DOT cameras and these other cameras that they always put up, but they're really going crazy with these flock cameras. I wonder if that has anything to do with the I know this is local, but it's just funny how certain towns and cities can just be super corrupt and do shenanigans. Surfside also just like randomly sent a half million dollars to the wrong address and it disappeared from their uh Yeah, I know they're going nuts down in uh Surfside Beach. Uh it says the software logs a vehicle's make and color along with identifying features such as bumper stickers. That's gonna get libertarians in trouble. That might be one of the most identifiable things if you're a libertarian or not, what wild shit you have on your car. Yeah, uh it says it now operates more than 6,000 uh uh in or nationwide. Hampton Roads has embraced the technology. More than 600 operate across the region, including 70 in Suffolk, Virginia. So this guy started uh chopping down the poles, he started defacing the face of the cameras. He uh it said the police finally found him. Uh, he admitted to investigators he damaged the cameras, telling them he used vice grips to disassemble the two-piece poles and kept some of the wiring, batteries, and solar panels was part of how he ended up getting caught.

SPEAKER_04 39:43

Uh I would have been there with a demo saw, just saw an okay, cut them right down.

SPEAKER_03 39:49

Get a chainsaw and a crowbar and just uh just a demo saw.

SPEAKER_04 39:53

Like they use the big wheel, crank that sucker up.

SPEAKER_03 39:58

Well, it says it says it's $800 a camera, $500 per pole, and it's a $350 solar panel. So yeah, this this'll be an interesting uh civil war fight over these uh these flock cameras. But I thought that was interesting. That that was a nice heartwarming story.

SPEAKER_04 40:20

Yeah. Who owns the flock cameras there?

SPEAKER_03 40:24

Well, I mean it must be the the company that's contracting out. It didn't really say in the article, and then the city contracts don't.

SPEAKER_04 40:32

Of course, they're not gonna tell you what the company is because then the people will go after the company.

SPEAKER_03 40:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 40:40

But I I did Oh, go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 40:44

Keep it secret. Yeah, keep it secret. This I think because they're just starting to pop up in Ori County, this will be a really fun thing to uh uh test each of these little cities. Yeah. Well, we have a history of if you turn the public. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_05 41:03

I was gonna say, this is part of their their stupid city uh initiative, you know, the quote smart city initiative that is failed everywhere, yeah, gone. And uh Myrtle Beach and uh Ory County has adopted that that same BS. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 41:25

We've had a lot of controversies over that smart city uh bullshit the last uh year. Uh but I moving on, this is I don't know if this would be considered a political story or maybe more of a rogue violence uh uh incident. A Japanese woman was arrested for sewing a roommate's mouth shut. This has kind of like a Hannibal Lecter vibe to it, I think. What roommate feel that?

SPEAKER_05 41:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 41:59

Well, you know, it's funny. I remember when the bath salts were a real big thing in like Miami. There was a story of uh a roommate guy, his roommate woke up to his drugged-out roommate ripping his heart out with his bare hands. He was like pounding into his chest and broke his rib cage and ripped his heart out of his body and ate it. Oh my god. Be careful with these roommates.

SPEAKER_02 42:28

Yeah, just don't keep people over that long.

SPEAKER_03 42:32

Yeah, you don't want people, yeah, you don't want to fall asleep with people still in your house.

SPEAKER_05 42:47

She said roommate drugs. Yeah, I was gonna say roommate. Yeah, well, it's a male or a woman. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:54

Well, it's woman. So a Japanese woman was arrested for sewing shut the lips of another woman she was living with, causing injuries that left her unable to eat or speak. Massei Sakurai, 49, a part-time worker, was arrested Monday in Koga, a city in part-time worker.

SPEAKER_04 43:14

Yeah, maybe, maybe uh the roommate was giving her boyfriend a blowjob.

SPEAKER_03 43:20

Oh, that that would be one that that's a good uh null hypothesis.

SPEAKER_04 43:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 43:27

You won't do that again, won't you? What are you saying? It said this lady, it's a city in Iberakai, uh, a northeast part of Tokyo, uh, did the attack on her 42-year-old roommate. Police say Miss Sakurai used a needle and thread to sew the woman's lips together at 1 30 p.m. local time, June 29th. They did not disclose whether Miss Sakurai had admitted to the allegations, but announced they were investigating the relationship between the two women. The victim escaped the house the following day while Miss Sakurai was out, so apparently this was also some sort of abduction story.

SPEAKER_04 44:15

It was tied up.

SPEAKER_03 44:17

Japan Today reported, wearing a white face mask, she ran to a nearby shop and handed a staff member a note reading, please help me, because she was unable to speak. The woman later told police uh fear of Miss Sakurai had prevented her from fleeing sooner. I was afraid I couldn't escape right away. The two women had been living together since April 2025, Kyoto News reported. Police said other people had been staying as well, and they were questioned as part of the interview, and uh they were questioning the possibility of some of them being present. And acquaintances of Miss Sakurai told local broadcaster TV As Ashahai that they had a history of allowing people. Who had left their homes to stay with her to help them find work. So that that's a long story. Slash maybe mental illness or can you imagine tying someone up and manually with a needle and string just sl slowly sewing their mouth shut? If she can no longer talk, what else did she do? Like go through her freaking tongue or something?

SPEAKER_04 45:33

Or I won't just start off with a Japanese girl again.

SPEAKER_03 45:40

They always say the Thai girls are the dangerous ones, or the Filipinos.

SPEAKER_04 45:44

They're the Japanese girls. They're quiet. The quiet ones are the most dangerous.

SPEAKER_05 45:52

What are they doing? They say the Chinese ones are more with their mouths. What are these Asians doing with their mouths? That's why I just want to know. They they're eating hair pies and they're sewing them shut and drinking foot juice and oh good lord.

SPEAKER_03 46:10

Well, I will say they they have this uh meme that like Chinese women are more direct with you and Japanese women they'll just like kill you in your sleep, so they're more quiet and plotting than the uh the other ones. That was a nice little revenge story.

SPEAKER_02 46:27

But uh, pleasant. That's a real pleasant one.

SPEAKER_03 46:32

If uh I will say, did you guys see uh I forget what award show just happened, but they had Alyssa Liu wearing like this, she had like her side tit out and a some dress up tight on her ass. I had a flashback to the feed juice story. I didn't know. I'd probably scrub up some of her feed juice. Oh lord.

SPEAKER_02 46:54

Yeah, oh I was like we don't visit the same sites, Randy.

SPEAKER_03 47:02

She was looking pretty juicy, I'll just put it that way. Oh, but uh moving on to uh back to Russia. Russia holds its first humanoid robot wedding in Moscow Library. So it Russia's going a little wild lately. They they have the clairvoyance, the warlocks, and now they're doing uh robot weddings. It said two humanoid robots exchanged vows uh created by artificial intelligence at Moscow's Pushkin Library. Russia's first robot wedding, according to organizers, was staged to demonstrate awareness of the nation's humanoid robotics efforts. The two robots were named Robert and Matilda, constructed by Russian company IT Imperial. There was no legal marital status, so the purpose of the event was to demonstrate the capabilities of these humanoid robots and greater public interaction with this technology.

SPEAKER_05 48:05

So I guess they're not gonna be able to do that. They won't have uh a later on uh the first humanoid robotic divorce uh going through. Um entertaining.

SPEAKER_03 48:25

Yeah, yeah. Oh, robot alimony, then you'll have robot killdozer. This can escalate. Yeah. It says Robert plays office worker while Matilda dances as a ballerina. And they also have Dogmatic, the robot dog.

SPEAKER_02 48:47

Oh do they have a little plastic home?

SPEAKER_03 48:52

Yeah, I I I guess.

SPEAKER_05 48:55

This is getting a little jets as long. Yeah, I can see that there would be like uh uh allegations of uh you know cheating on each other and doing strange things to the dog. Going out with the boat.

SPEAKER_03 49:15

Hey, what's he been doing with that vacuum? That's right. Well it's uh what's funny is you remember that uh that robot flipping out at the restaurant? Like it started malfunctioning and like injuring the restaurant workers? It just started like spinning in the circle.

SPEAKER_02 49:35

Dude, I love those. I like the ones where they go crazy in the parades and punch the kids. Those are my favorite in China.

SPEAKER_03 49:43

Remember, we had one from a few months ago where uh the robot was following some woman?

SPEAKER_01 49:49

Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_03 49:51

You can go a little haywire. Uh it said uh images and videos of the event went viral, and the event was described as symbolic and playful, uh, with no legal significance. But Robert and Matilda apparently got married. So can you imagine uh the I'll be back situation when uh she finds Robert putting his uh you know his crowbar into the the wand of the vacuum and the toaster's getting allegations, and all of a sudden uh, you know, he's driving a car through the window. So they this could this could escalate. And you know they have robot war things like uh at the convention center here. Yeah, we gotta go to that. I'll go to that. Well, that would be awesome.

SPEAKER_02 50:37

Yeah, let's go. Let me know when that happens. That and the flotation tanks. I'm up for both of those.

SPEAKER_03 50:42

Oh, yeah, we have to take a trip to Wilmington for those uh flotation tanks. But the most the most uh momentous story of the day, Taco Bell is pulling certain ingredients from menu items amid explosive diarrhea parasite outbreak. So is this really news?

SPEAKER_04 51:13

This is you know Yeah, yeah, there's something going around like 13 states where the fruit and vegetables are contaminated with parasites. Well, you know, they had the devil's diarrhea. The devil's lettuce.

SPEAKER_02 51:30

Yeah, shrub them vegetables down. This is on the loop in the 24-hour news. It just keeps cycling over and over again, like the diarrhea it is.

SPEAKER_03 51:40

Yeah, it seems to be a recurring theme.

SPEAKER_02 51:43

It's a diarrhea story.

SPEAKER_03 51:44

Well, and you remember the a week or two ago where the in South China they were seeing gnomes from the uh the fungi in their uh plastic.

SPEAKER_02 51:54

Yeah, that makes perfect sense in the simulation, totally. The gnomes are everywhere. The diarrhea, it's an after fact.

SPEAKER_05 52:03

That story actually hit the mainstream media now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:07

I saw it. I love it, man. It's it's empirical too. Those mushrooms are real. The mushrooms are real. And it went on for days. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 52:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:22

I'm taking a break from all that kind of stuff.

SPEAKER_03 52:25

Well, it wasn't like they were seeing a bunch of random psychedelic space warping things. They would just go along for 12 hours and then all of a sudden a gnome would pop out and interact with their surroundings.

SPEAKER_02 52:37

So they got that guy that I I don't know who he is, but they they gave him an injection of DMT, like an IV injection. So he was he was under DMT longer than you're, you know, a human should be. And he was seeing source code on the walls. Oh, really? Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 52:57

I like it.

SPEAKER_03 52:58

Well, well, here's the thing with our more local uh issue here. It says Taco Bell is pulling some fresh ingredients from his menu from its menu items as a parasite outbreak that causes explosive watery diarrhea is spreading across the country. The fast food chain posted signs at several locations, including in Metro, Detroit, informing customers that they are unable to provide a handful of produce items regularly on the menu because of a spike in cycloporiasis cases. Nearly a thousand people in Michigan had been infected with the new illness. The state typically identifies only about 50 cases a year, but it's not a good thing.

SPEAKER_04 53:46

That's just normal taco smell.

SPEAKER_02 53:51

I'm not sure what's uh you know, what if this is like they're practicing their hysteric runs, so they're just testing this again to see if they can induce diarrhea by showing this on the 24-hour news to see how many people just bring it upon themselves.

SPEAKER_03 54:08

Yeah, it's just like confirmation bias now. Every time you eat I know I've got the explosive diarrhea, honey. I have the watery diarrhea.

SPEAKER_04 54:15

Yeah, I was at Taco Bell last week. I got it. I can't get off the ball, it's strapped to my ass.

SPEAKER_03 54:23

This might be a Trump plan to take out Taco Bell.

SPEAKER_05 54:28

Or another reason not to show up for a work or that meeting you don't want to show up to. Oh, I went to Taco Bell, I can't do it.

SPEAKER_02 54:38

We've all got it. We've all got it. Even our neighbors have it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 54:43

Well, it does say exposure to cyclospora parasites leads to cyclosporiasis, a nasty stomach bug caught usually caught through contaminated produce, and cases have spiked, including Michigan, Illinois, Virginia, Ohio, and New York.

SPEAKER_04 55:02

So Well, where where did this thing come from? Because it just doesn't appear.

SPEAKER_03 55:07

The sedan like Ebola. It first it showed up in the motor city first here, so like I'm sure it it's came from some sort of uh f foreign tourism.

SPEAKER_04 55:18

Now, didn't Detroit have some pollution with the wall with their water at one time? It was a flint. Flint Michigan, right? So think about that. You have polluted water, they don't know really what's in it, and you're growing vegetables and stuff on the farm there, and that water is being used. Could that create the parasites?

SPEAKER_02 55:44

Yeah, and they there's a history, there's a history of using sewage water to spray crops, which causes this sort of stuff in the past. That's that's happened quite a bit, actually.

SPEAKER_04 55:55

Well, it's called well, gray water.

SPEAKER_02 55:58

Yeah. Well, untreated sewage water, they've been caught doing that before. I know in California that's been a thing. In the Republic.

SPEAKER_03 56:06

Yeah, the logic of uh yeah, they use manure on farms that that's different than taking nasty sewer water and spraying water.

SPEAKER_04 56:14

Well, what do you think your tap water is? That's just recycled water.

SPEAKER_03 56:19

Yeah, a bunch of uh body shit water that they've uh felt.

SPEAKER_04 56:25

Water is a little brown this morning.

SPEAKER_03 56:29

Is that rust or is the water treatment department not doing their job? I know uh it still doesn't get the PFAS out, so uh true. If you don't get the the parasitic uh diarrhea worm, then you just get that all of everybody else's medications that they flush down the toilet.

SPEAKER_02 56:48

That's what made that lady sew the other lady's mouth shut.

SPEAKER_04 56:52

Yeah, there was a psychedelic the the medication.

SPEAKER_03 56:56

She was just drinking the water.

SPEAKER_04 56:58

She was just drinking the water.

SPEAKER_03 57:00

She said she saw a scary gnome go in her mouth and she didn't want to come back out. There's nothing about the there it is. Yeah, there's the truth. Well, and here is a heartwarming story that I I think will uh this is the best trajectory. Uh upstate New York school district will deploy a humanoid robot teacher this fall. So uh when students return to school in Salamanca City Central School District in western New York, a new kind of teacher will be ready to greet them. The small rural district located on Seneca Nation Reservation. Oh, this is on a reservation.

SPEAKER_02 57:47

They're experimenting on the kids.

SPEAKER_03 57:48

Oh, experimenting on the indigenous.

SPEAKER_02 57:51

Such a good history with that.

SPEAKER_03 57:55

Taking a break from the central New York in the city experimenting on the Bill Gates found the perfect uh little test tube for his uh robot teacher. It said it will not replace the classroom teacher, but it is programmed to provide learning support for students and educators. At a board meeting last month, a tech company, Realbotics, along with an AI teacher's assistant program, is allowing students to interact with an avatar of the robot on laptops. The deployment in a working school district represents a landmark moment for both AI and humanoid robotics. Salamanca marks the beginning of a new era where humanoid robots and intelligent AI assistants become the standard tools in STEM education. The female robot's name is Sally, and she will have a lifelike appearance with silicone skin and long brown hair. It will be stationary in a seated position, but have a wide range of upper body movements and facial expressions. This sounds kind of hot to me.

SPEAKER_04 59:03

Sounds like hot for the teacher.

SPEAKER_02 59:05

Oh man. This is gonna go the way of the flock camera pretty quick.

SPEAKER_03 59:13

This could end up like some uh what some sort of robot bestiality, uh, the way that they're describing it. End up with a baseball bat to the head. It said students will use a unique identification code when interacting with the robot during class, allowing Oh, the number of the beast.

SPEAKER_02 59:32

That's their code.

SPEAKER_03 59:35

The robot beast. Wait a minute. Is this robot from Rome? You know an interesting thing about that? When in Revelation, when uh uh the number of the beast, the 666 passage is mentioned, that is code for Caesar. And in some of the other Bibles it said 616, which was the number breakdown to Caesar in Rome.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:01

It's Caesar, did he write the passage? What's that? I said not Caesar, did he write the passage?

SPEAKER_03 1:00:10

Well, see, he's here's what's interesting about Revelation, because when the uh the woman comes from the water and the like multi-headed beast, uh she's wearing purple and scarlet, which were the colors of the Roman Empire, and it mentions the uh the seven-headed beast as a reference to the seven hills of Rome, the main identifying thing of Rome. And then in Greek and Latin, depending on which one it was, they either had 666 or 616, which breaks down in their language to Nero Caesar.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:41

Yeah, but that's uh it all goes back to um the the Roman Empire, there uh the Pope uh eliminating original textbooks from the Bible that tell the real truth because those books that they were kept out of the Bible by the Vatican would uh they wouldn't be able to control the people and brainwash them.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:12

I think I think we're getting a little off a little askew here.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:19

Maybe maybe she has uh an outfit with those colors.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:23

Well, listen, if the beast ends up being some hot brunette with silicone skin, you know, it might not be that bad. Uh it said they they will refer to students by their number, such as, hi, I'm student1234, and the robot will respond, hi. We uh we were talking about this yesterday. Do you want to continue the conversation like uh an AI chat stream?

SPEAKER_04 1:01:46

So the kids are now uh just a number like everybody else.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:51

This is getting a little Orwellian feel to it. Oh yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:56

It says Celum student 234, you're misbehaving. Go to the principal's office.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:04

You screwed up PEMDAS, you're gonna get the cane now. It says Celamanca plans to introduce the robot on uh in its curriculum along with Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak to Prep Suit. So I know we're coming up on the uh on the time at the one hour mark, but uh this was a really fun little mobile monkey mobile monkey show. We had lips getting sewn together and teacher robots, so uh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:37

Yeah, it's getting getting there. Very good. Yep. Well, I hope everybody gets a chance to tune in to another episode of Microphone Monkeys. It drops every Thursday. And if you like more of this type of content, go to libertycrackmedia. Here we come!

SPEAKER_00 1:02:55

The looking title of the street got the gun no tax system. I'm free to trade.