Episode 20: You Can’t Biohack Your Way Out of a Broken Foundation

Everyone wants the shortcut. The peptide. The hormone therapy. The thing that's going to finally make it all click. But here's the truth, if your foundational habits aren't dialed in first, you're building on a shaky foundation. In this episode, we're talking about what actually needs to be in place before you layer on the advanced stuff, and why your environment, your job, your relationships, your daily surroundings, might be the silent thing sabotaging your results.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why peptides and HRT are tools, not solutions, and what needs to come first before they'll actually work for you
• The non-negotiable foundational habits of nutrition, sleep, strength training, and stress management that no supplement can replace
• How to honestly audit your environment and ask the hard question: Is my life set up to support my health, or is it working against me?
• The role your relationships play in your results. And what to do if the people around you aren't aligned with the life you're trying to build
• Why your job and daily stress load matter more than your macro split
• The difference between optimizing and compensating, and which one most women are accidentally doing
• How to build a lifestyle that makes healthy habits the path of least resistance, not a daily battle of willpower

Connect With Us:

@marcinevin 

@eats_by_dre_nutrition

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

My friend, how are you? Oh, I've been better. I'm fine. All all things considered, you know, things are good. I am house sitting yet again, and it has been the most stressful job that I have ever had. Most of them are pretty easy, but I am dealing with a dog right now that I've watched a couple of times at this point, but only for day visits. This is a two-night stay, and it has anxiety separ well, I should say separation anxiety. And so the first day was fine, but when night rolls around, it turns into a demon of a dog. So I tried to go to bed at my normal time on Friday night, and within a half an hour, it starts whimpering and then howling for hours and going back and forth from the room that it was sleeping in to my room, whimpering, howling. Yeah. So I think it finally shut up at around, I don't know, 2:30 in the morning and then started again at 5 45 on Saturday morning. It was fine during the day yesterday. I just kept the back door open to let it run in and out because it was such a beautiful day here. It was 75. So I wanted to be going in and out as well. And it was great. It was just playing in the backyard. And then I fed it. It came in, it went back out. And I ate dinner outside, which I always try to do this time of year just because it's so nice. Why not? And I went back in, sat on the couch for a little bit, was reading my book. I'm like, I gotta bring this dog in, like before it starts to get dark. It was impossible. First, I couldn't find it. I thought that maybe I had heard it come into the house. So I was going to the rooms and I couldn't find it there. So I go outside, I'm yelling for it. It doesn't come. Finally, it miraculously appears and uh it like runs away from me. So I don't know why, but for whatever reason, it's like terrified terrified of me. So I try to get close to it, it runs, and it is so fast that it'll just do like circles around the yard and it will not come. So um that was going on until 10. Finally, I had to call the owners and be like, I don't know what to do at this point. Like, I'm out here with my flashlight trying to get your fucking dog to come in, and it won't. They're like, Well, put me on speaker and maybe she'll hear my voice and come, like, go get some treats, go get the leash. No, that would not work. And so finally they said, Hey, we understand you're doing everything that you can. Like, this is not your fault. So just leave her, leave her out there. Clearly, she's happy as a clam. Leave the back door open, the light on, and she'll come in when she gets too cold or when she feels like it. And it was like, okay, because I was literally thinking that I'm either gonna have to stay on the couch or try to sleep on the couch so that I can maybe hear it if it comes in, or sleep outside on the the lawn chair just to like make you know what I mean? Yeah. Um, so yeah, they gave me permission to go to bed, which was really nice. And I woke up. So I it took me a while to fall asleep just because my adrenaline was so high and I was still a little bit nervous. So it was occupying my mind. So I finally fell asleep, I don't know, maybe 11, 10, I would say 11. And then I woke up at 12:30, 2:30, and 4:30 to this dog still outside and barking and howling. Uh, the people are having work done on their backyard, and so there's like this ditch that's been built right outside the back door, and I could hear the whimpering. I'm like, did this dog fall on the damn ditch? And so I went out there and I looked, and no, it didn't. Um, but and then I it sounded like maybe there was an animal that it was trying to fight in the backyard, but I think it was more an like another dog or animal on the other side of the fence. So it was growling and barking at that. Anyway, so at 4 30, I was just like, screw it, I'm going back inside. I don't know what to do. And I woke up this morning around 6 15 and it had finally come in and it was on the couch. But even this morning, like it's still terrified of me. It like won't let me get near it. It's crazy. So I'm like, I'm really surprised that the neighbors did not come knocking on the door and be like, get a hold of your dog. Yeah. Is it a small dog? No, it's not small. I would say uh 40-50 pounds, it's a terrier, it's you know, it was a rescue, so it probably has PTSD for some reason and yeah, refuses to go in. To me, that's a small dog.

SPEAKER_01 4:37

We grew up with dogs that were like 80 pounds.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

Oh no, no, no, and then next uh tomorrow I start this job that is two huge labs or not labs, golden retrievers. These dogs are bitter than me. I think the the big one that's younger is probably I would say like 120 pounds. Oh wow. And I went over to do the meet and greet last week, and it was like first, like it gets all in your business, right? Um, and then it was like jumping on me, and the paw like scratched my face, and this owner just sat there and like did nothing. She's like, Oh, oh, you know, she's still kind of a puppy. I'm like, four and a half is not a puppy, get a hold of your damn dog. Wasn't even apologizing, wasn't trying to get the dog off me. It was wild. So I'm like already anxious feeling. Oh my god. So anyway, that's what I've got going on. What's your story?

SPEAKER_01 5:28

Oh, you know, um, mom's back in the hospital, but as much as that has been very stressful, um, we think we have some answers and we think we're on the upswing. So I'm very, very happy. Um, but you know, that's still a stressor. Um, and another good thing, uh my my uh what's it what do you call it? Marathon of subbing has come to an end. I subbed 18 of possibly 19 days in May, and that is now done. I don't know how I made that, made it through that. Um, and of course it came at like the worst possible time, but that's now done, and uh that is a huge relief because even though it's not a hard job, um it still takes me away from home and the business and my family because I gotta get up and go and be there. Um, but that's now done, even though they still have another week of school. But um, I've already told everybody, yeah, I'm not coming in next week. I I need uh my time and my life back.

SPEAKER_00 6:28

So um rightfully so.

SPEAKER_01 6:30

Yeah, so so those are good. I mean, as it's been stressful, I told you. I've already cried twice today. Um yeah, but you know, that's a healthy just you know, because it's just been May has just been a shit show, but I'm very grateful for my health. I'm grateful for what I can do for my family, so it's been like perspective too, of just like you know, like I did a post or a story of you know how the gym is kind of in my only normalcy right now with everything going on, and I know I see people you know say it like this. Actually, you do it too. I I've seen you say, like, oh, today I get to, and you know, I really had that kind of moment of like, yeah, I get to do these things, especially like spending so much time in hospitals and then like you know, dealing with my grandmother, um, because she has dementia, like yeah, I get to, and I'm I'm really grateful that I've had like this one little piece that I've been able to hold on to, and so I am hopeful that we're on the upswing of things because this girl's very tired.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

Yeah, yeah. And I mean, I after my dad passed, and we were talking about this offline, have it on a Sunday, on Thursday. I woke up and I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I was exhausted because I had been, you know, pushing through. And yeah, there were like things that I had to do as well. Like I had all these jobs lined up, I had clients to train in person, you know, online work to do. It's like you can't, I really just can't. I mean, could I, yes, to an extent slow down? Um, but it does make me grateful that that lasted, that was very temporary. Yeah. And then now I'm feeling so much better. And like how resilient my body is. Like, I haven't gained a ton of weight or from like even inflammation. Um, my body feels good. I have my energy back. I'm able to train. And that is why we talk so often about the importance of building these foundational habits. Like, yes, so you can look better, but also so that you can move through these situations with more grace, more ease, and in a way that your body isn't just going to completely retaliate. And so that you do have also that grounding mechanism, for lack of a better word, to get through these hard times that the area sense of normalcy, because I completely agree. Like my training, and it's not because, oh, the gym is my therapy. No, that's not it, but it is some semblance of control, and it is very grounding for both of us.

SPEAKER_01 9:12

So that's so funny because I almost added to my story about how it's not that it's therapy, like I really wanted to differentiate. Although it can feel therapeutic, and I don't want to take that piece away, but like it wasn't, it was just this like grounding. I like that word that you use that like helped me just feel normal for like an hour, you know, three times a week, which is not much, right? But like it just helped me feel normal and like it was for me, even though sometimes it was interrupted by many phone calls, but um, yeah, it was just like that one piece. And and I'll say, like, I know we chatted, I don't know if it was last week or whatnot, that I I did exit my my diet because it's just like I I can't take on the stress of like under eating right now. It's not that I couldn't follow through, I could. That's fine. I don't I can do that fairly well, especially if I know it's limited, but it was like, but my body's already under stress, and so I'm really happy to like just be at maintenance right now, and like that's another kind of routine that's been helpful. Not so much being able to control my food, it's that like I'm just nourished and like and then I have these routines already where I'm just like, Yep, we're having the same breakfast and lunch. Like, I I don't have any bandwidth to think about new recipes or you know, being crazy. Like, it's so that's actually been helpful too, to just be like, that's that's taken care of. Am I eating crazy?

SPEAKER_00 10:37

No, like it's just very like repetitive and it you know, as a caretaker, it can be really easy to lose your sense of self or even for lack of like your identity. Yeah, so the fact that you can still lean on these routines, or as I like to call them anchors, that yeah, because like anchors can be grounding um that you can lean on is really important. And then also when you have the energy, the capacity, the mental, emotional, I could say mental bandwidth, emotional resilience, then you can be a better caretaker. That's why it is not selfish to prioritize yourself first. Um, I know it's really difficult to do in the moment. You feel like you should be catering to others first, but you know, what good are you to them if you are a shell of yourself and you're falling apart?

SPEAKER_01 11:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:30

So going back to what you were saying about the deficit, I mean, I'm sure we've all been irritable, hangry, you know, it's like hungry and angry at the same time. So, yeah, like especially with what you're going through with your grandmother who has dementia and is not the kindest person to be around. Like, could you imagine dealing with those emotions if you were already feeling, you know, physically not like your best self because you were trying to diet and you didn't have those reserves?

SPEAKER_01 12:03

Exactly. Like, I just yeah, I barely have the reserves to do it right now, so it was like, yeah, this isn't easy. This is not the time for it, you know. And I you and I both like to preach, there's never, you know, perfect time 100%. But there are little caveats where like I'm in a season that's very rare, you know, right now. And I call it a season because it's not gonna be forever. My mom's not gonna be in the hospital forever, and though my grandmother's condition will worsen over time at some point, like it will be my mom and I both caretaking, you know, like so um, and I don't know where you know, I think the next year is gonna be very pertinent in like what we change for her care right now. Um, so anyways, like it's a season, and like, you know, I I don't need extra. This is not the time to be dieting, right? Even though, yeah, there's never a perfect time, but this is certainly just not appropriate right now.

SPEAKER_00 13:02

So yeah. And how has your sleep been? Because I know sleep can really get disrupted when you're highly stressed.

SPEAKER_01 13:08

It's been kind of extreme. Like there's times where I sleep like shit, which has kind of been par for the course because of perimenopause. Like, I've been struggling with that, and then there's times where like the other um was a Thursday night, I woke up and like I felt tired. I mean, I didn't feel rested, but then I looked and realized, oh, I was in bed like eight and a half hours. I got seven hours of actual sleep. That was amazing to me that I even got seven hours. Um, so sometimes I'm just so exhausted. I think that I am getting more sleep, but it's like I said, I still woke up really tired because it's not enough. So I don't know. It was not great, it was pretty bad. But I also went to the LA County Fair and was out late, which I I meant to ask you about that.

SPEAKER_00 13:57

What were you eating? Oh, those were deep fried Oreos. Those were deep fried because I saw the it was there was like a chicken on it, uh on the tissue paper or whatever you want to call it, and I was like, that's not chicken because I see sprinkles on it.

SPEAKER_01 14:11

So uh chicken Charlie's is like the vendor, and yeah, there that like every time we go, like we gotta get deep fried Oreos. So that's just like tradition. So that didn't help either, like eating kind of junky. I mean, it was fun. I mean, it was honestly like I just needed a few hours of not being anybody's caretaker, and like everybody was good at that moment. Like, I had just seen my mom, we had you know taken care of my grandmother, and I was like, okay, everybody just needs to give me like three hours to just have a little bit of like fun, normalcy, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:49

And I was like, Yeah, we're gonna have some deep ride of horrorism, great, but it didn't do much for my sleep, so it's it's funny you say that because last year my mom and I went to our fair as well, and that's something that was a tradition when I was a kid. We would meet up with another family, we would go to the horse races, and then we would go to the what do they call it? Um, the midway or whatever, where it's to ride the rides. Yeah. And my dad and I would always get a chocolate-covered banana. So we want my mom and I wanted to go last year again, just to have normal sea, nostalgia, all of that. I'm like, and I'm getting myself a chocolate covered banana because it has been years, and I love sprinkles, so I did notice the sprinkles on your corneos. I'm like, that's the way to do it, whatever she's eating. Yes. Um, so I got yeah, I got one with covered in sprinkles, and it just was not good. Like the banana was like had like freezer burn, and oh no. It's like, oh, this is disappointing. So I didn't finish it all, but again, just that nostalgia was really nice to have. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:50

We were like kind of saying the fair was kind of, I was like, I don't know, maybe I've outgrown the fair, or it's just a little like it was not as well attended as it usually is, especially because today's the last day. So I was kind of nervous, like, oh god, there's gonna be just hordes of people um with closing weekend. But there wasn't, I mean, there was a good number, but it wasn't like where you can't move. And um food was okay, but I don't know. I I don't know if it just like mentally I really just wasn't all there, but it was fun, it was it did what it needed to do, but yeah, yeah, I kind of felt the same.

SPEAKER_00 16:25

So well, good stuff. Uh, what are we talking about today, my friend? Well, I'm actually forgetting because we had two, I think, topics. Um yeah, so we were gonna talk about peptides, hormone replacement therapy, all of these things that are trending recently that I think a lot of women want to use as a band-aid that can actually become more of a band-aid on a bullet wound. Um or I shouldn't say a band, they're wanting it to be the magic pill when really it's yeah, when really it's putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. And that you really do uh you have to um what am I how am I trying to say this? Um, you have to earn the right. So uh it's a so peptides are a privilege. Even I would I wouldn't want to say HRT is necessarily a privilege, but you could go that route. Um, you really have to have the foundations in place, or else, yeah, you're just adding gasoline to the fire.

SPEAKER_01 17:28

For sure. And I think, yeah, especially like HRT, which I actually have a um an appointment with my doctor in two weeks. So I'll be exploring that option for myself. Um I mean, I think it's life-changing for a lot of women, but at the same time, like I it's not gonna fix everything if you got a lot of things that still need, you know, fixing. And yeah, I think that sometimes, not always, I'm not trying to, you know, make this a black and white situation here, but sometimes people don't find success because there's just too many of you know fundamental things not there. And so it's like, yeah, this idea of a band-aid over, you know, a bullet wound, like it's what is it gonna do? Like, not even like ter temporary, like I just don't know what you know. Look at like women who are not in perimenopause or even postmenopause who are having issues because of let's say lifestyle, right? Like the they have the hormone profile, so it's not necessarily, you know, one thing. Um, and I like to always kind of say and remind people like the body is so complex, it's never gonna be one thing. It it's it can't be, right? Because one thing leads to another and it has a cascade of an effect over here. So, you know, at the very least, those fundamentals are like those have to be first before, you know.

SPEAKER_00 18:58

It's just well, and and also uh let's just be honest, and call it like it is. If you don't have those foundations in place, then you haven't uh exhausted everything that you could be doing to get better results, to feel better. Now we know that low hormones, progesterone, estrogen, especially, that can magnify the symptoms that you are experiencing from perimenopause. So hormones may improve that. Uh or it can, I should say it may magnify, yes, but it can make it more challenging because if those hormones are low, you are less resilient to stress. So progesterone, estrogen is like your body's armor, so to speak. Um, and so that's why things that used to work in your 20s and in your early 30s, when your your hormones were fully online, you could get away with, you know, working out more, kind of overtraining, not sleeping as well because you had that buffer, your body was more resilient and now you don't. So, yeah, stressors are going to impact you more. You're not going to have as good of sleep. So that's going to impact energy, hunger, cravings, your ability to, you know, get more movement, push yourself hard in the gym. So when women say, like, I'm doing all the same things, like, well, you know, are you really? Like, are you doing it as consistently as you had been? And I think that's where you have to get really honest with yourself. And until you are being, let's say, 90% consistent, which we've talked about on this podcast, uh, as a woman in perimenopause, you are leaving results on the table. And yes, these hormones might give you a little bit more energy. Um, and so you can push a little bit harder, but they're not gonna be a panacea for sure. No.

SPEAKER_01 20:48

Yeah, I mean, and I think just like can we really how do I want to say this? Um I think what like kind of trips people up is we don't see an immediate return on some of those fundamentals. I mean, sometimes, I mean, if you're really far from optimal, you might see some big improvements with very small improvements or changes, right? Uh, but for you know, I'd say a majority of like the women I'm working with, you know, they're trying, they're they're in the realm, they're doing some of the things, right? And so like when we start to put in these fundamentals, you might not see this big bang for your buck right away. So it's frustrating. And I I want to acknowledge that, yeah, it's kind of a slow process, which is part of you being in midlife and like at this point where, like, yeah, like you're not super resilient, you're not gonna, you know, it's wow, I did this one thing and like my body responded, you know, right away. Um, yeah, we don't have that responsiveness anymore. So anyway, I want to acknowledge that it it can be frustrating, but it doesn't make it not true, right? Those fundamentals still need to be there. Um, I I do think though, at some point, once you have Have a really good foundation, you can see much better results. It just takes time. And that has been actually my experience with clients who are with me long term. Like I have a handful of ladies who've been with me, you know, years. And like our first fat loss fat loss phases are often not as productive as later ones because we have just gotten into a better rhythm, they have way better routines, and they have bought into the process of like, yeah, I just I need to sleep, I need to de-stress, I need to, you know, XYZ. And then we go into fat loss phases and they're like, oh my god, this is so much easier. Or they're just like, you know, their body is much more responsive. I'm like, yeah, like I used to say, like, a healthy body is a responsive body. So if you're not responsive, there might be some things you need to like go look at. I love that phrase. I think it's on my website, but yeah, look at that.

SPEAKER_00 22:53

I credit brand, I credit Brandon DeCruz for that. Um, and I used to say it all the time when I was doing sales for nutrition dynamic and I was talking to people, I was like, Yeah, a healthy body is a responsive body. So if you were doing all the things and you're not getting the results, there's some sort of underlying issue at play, whether it's hormones, inflammation, you know, gut health, poor detox, nervous system dysregulation, all of it. And that's like going back to the peptides, I was saying like peptides is a privilege. So it because it's an amplifier and it's actually a stressor on the body. So if things are not good under the hood, then you know it can again be like adding gasoline to a fire. So you want to be really cautious of that. And to your point, I also am going to go on HRT. Again, I was on testosterone off and on for a couple of years. I never really noticed a difference, but like my levels were definitely low. So was my estrogen and progesterone. And I really think that it I mean, I have the foundations on lockdown, probably better than anybody. I'm gonna toot my own horn, and I have for years, but I think that the reason my hormones are still in the tank goes back to when I was in my 20s and all the damage that I did. And really, I have not been able to bring them back online, regardless of all of the work that I've done, the practitioners that I've worked with, uh, you know, all of it. So it is frustrating, but yeah, I know that just from like a protective mechanism, it is gonna be beneficial for me to get back on all three. And I am considering peptides as well. I'm just gonna put it out there, but I am gonna meet with a woman who is running very extensive lab work, and she's gonna look at what's going on and then be able to make recommendations. Here's the dosing, you know, maybe I'm not even a good candidate for HRT at this point. And then I'm gonna take that information to the company that I partner with that she's also affiliated with, and run it by them. So it's really important that, you know, you don't just go into your doctor and they're not running the labs and like based on your symptoms, like, oh yeah, sure, we'll give it to you. Um, yeah. So I think that's just something to consider. And I'm really excited to hear what she has to say. Uh admittedly, I'm a little bit nervous as well. Uh, but like the peptide that I want to go on is GHKCU, which for me is for vanity purposes, it's really good for mostly the skin, you know, nails, um hair, all of that. I also was watching a reel the other day where the guy said it can be good as a preventative for cancer, which was like, okay, then absolutely. Um, yeah. So anyway.

SPEAKER_01 25:51

I'd like to highlight that like this is a you have been through so many other things before you're going to peptides, and even that is still like maybe you're gonna do it, right? Like it's not like I'm not getting results, so I'm gonna go straight to I I just wanna highlight that you've have a long road of doing all the other things, and this is an add-on. And um, I feel the same way like about HRT for myself. Like, I've been I'll say suffering for a good amount of time now with the sleep, and I've tried. Um, now I think that one thing that can really be helpful is just like having two jobs um has not been helpful. And I I told you this beforehand. Sometimes, like the best thing you could do is not peptides, it's not, you know, all these, you know, trendy things. It's like maybe you just need to like quit that job that's like super stressful and is making you unhappy and gives you no time to yourself, or maybe you need to leave that person who's toxic. Like, sometimes that's actually the fix because that's the biggest bottleneck. I mean, I've had at least three clients that I have walked, not I didn't tell them to quit their job, but like it just kept coming up. Like, I cannot, there's no protocol I can give you to make up for the stress that you are incurring from this job. So that's on you. It's not my decision, but like, hey, you are choosing to continue this job. You just have to understand like the the roadblocks it's creating for you, and like how much harder it this is. And if that's fine because you can't leave the job or you really do like it, but I never thought that that was the case. That's you know, that's your choice, but just understand. And like they left their jobs, and then it was like, oh, we just like opened up the floodgates for them to actually get some results.

SPEAKER_00 27:45

So yeah. Um, and we were talking offline as well uh about a post that I saw from one of our former mentors, and he said, Is your functional health obsession just a midlife crisis? Yeah, and I said that's so funny. It's like some people quit their job, some people get divorced, some people buy a sports car, some people take 30 different supplements to kill parasites or, you know, optimize their hormones, whatever it's gonna be. And he said, you know, for most people, you're better off quitting the job you hate, getting that divorce, or buying that sports car. Those three options will remove stress, help you sleep better, and feel more alive than you felt in years. And I can completely relate. I know I've talked about the part-time job that I was working for about a year and a half that was sucking my soul. It was only eight hours a week. I when all things were said and done, more like 10, just with the getting ready, the commute. But and like the job itself was not stressful, but it was the person who I worked for and just his poor communication. I did not feel respected, valued, and it was just this constant drain on my energy. But also I constantly felt like my body or I was being chased by the tiger because every time I opened my email, I was worried that I was gonna get this passive aggressive one from him, you know, just all that bullshit. And so finally I left and it felt like this huge sense of relief. And immediately I felt more at peace. So um, yeah, absolutely that can make a huge difference.

SPEAKER_01 29:20

I think what we have to remember is that sometimes we want to compartmentalize health in terms of like, well, I just want to look better, you know, and like some people, uh most people, I think, especially in the the world that you and I live in, because we're coaches, it ends up being physique that people are looking for, which is great. It's fine. I, you know, I'm happy to help people with that. I also want to infuse health. Um, but what we don't remember is that like just because you want, you know, a certain look doesn't mean that like your stress load, your emotional bandwidth, your connection to people, you know, your sense of purpose. Like, there's so many other pieces to the puzzle, your health in general, um, that have to be in play. And like, yeah, we we can I can help you with nutrition, I can help you with exercise, um, I can help you a little bit with like stress management, um, but that's you know, you have to really take up that mantle to make it um take it seriously. But there's also these other pieces too. Like, do you have connection? Do you have a community that you know you are safe with that um that supports you and that you can support? Do you have purpose in your life? You know, do you have meaning in your job or just your day-to-day? Um, you know, that like there's so many other aspects that like it it's not again, not one thing. I mean, we can certainly I can help you with a piece of your the pie here, but we can't forget that that shitty job that it might be your biggest problem. And you don't need me so much as just take a hard look at what is really important to you and whether it's worth you know what it's doing to you.

SPEAKER_00 31:04

So I mean, because when you think about it, you're at your job just as much, if not more, than you are with your family. Uh-huh. So I may maybe not on the weekend, but during the week, you know, you spend eight plus hours at work and then a couple of hours at home in the evening with your family. So that makes a difference. But also your oh no, I'm just gonna say like environment matters absolutely, whether it's your home or your work. So if you feel uh unfulfilled, unhappy, unsafe, that right there is nervous system dysregulation, and it will be very, very difficult to get results.

SPEAKER_01 31:46

I will say, as just like a personal um example, I you know, I taught for 21 years, and I'd say the last 10 years where things really started, I was like, oh, this is hard, and like this is a long road. And then the last five years was just like, oh my god, I don't know if I'm gonna make it because it was just so emotionally taxing, and I just remember every morning that alarm going off, and I was it was awful the feeling of just like I don't want to go because I was losing a sense of purpose because you know, I I mean I could really go off on the education system, but like there just wasn't room for me to, you know, be an excellent teacher who was also healthy emotionally um and physically, and you know, obviously I don't teach anymore, and you know, now my job is very volatile because like especially compared to teaching. Teaching, I got the same. I I could have told you my check every single month. I was on a salary schedule, like that was very um stable. I had amazing insurance, like there were all these really great parts of it, and I lost all that, obviously, being a business owner, and there's no like stability. It's just like you have an amazing month and you have a terrible month, you have a gr uh okay month, and then you know, you're all over the place, right? And yet I am so much happier, even though like I've taken on that volatility, but just being able to have what I was really kind of being, which was really creating so much misery. Like, I have so much more purpose now because I have the freedom to help people the way I want to. I, you know, I have freedom over my time. Um, like right now, this month of just craziness was nice to be able to have time to like go see my mom and take care of my grandmother, and like that has made a world of difference, even though I did trade one stress for another, but it's a the trade was in my favor. Um, yeah, your job it's a huge piece. Jobs and relationships. Yep, I would say two of the biggest for sure. Yeah, I was gonna say before, I think there's a s a statistic that most people, or it's a high percentage of people who find like their spouse at their job because you spend so much time there. Like, yeah, you're spending so much time with these people. I would always turn that around with parents to be like, I'm spending so much time with your children, I am with them six, seven hours a day, 180 days for a year, like you know, it's important, like that relationship to me because I am a significant person for that year.

SPEAKER_00 34:28

Yeah. I don't think we're saying make any impulsive decision and get a divorce or quit your job, but this is just a pause for reflection and get honest with yourself.

SPEAKER_01 34:42

I feel like there's like I'm gonna call it a health wheel where like each piece is a part of this wheel, and you can kind of like color out like you know how fulfilled or happy you are in each section, so you can kind of visually see, you know, what parts of your health are lacking, and then you know, yeah, like you said, have some time for reflection on like what can I do to improve that. I mean, I get that like some people don't have a choice, you have to keep the job because you've got to pay bills, I get it. Um and you know, I don't know that anybody's health is ever at a hundred percent in all areas, but there's probably places that can, you know, can be improved. Um and it's worth a look at. I think if you're struggling, whether it's your health or weight or you know, you're you can't get the progress you want, is like, okay, well, are we looking at everything and what else you know might be lacking instead?

SPEAKER_00 35:36

Yeah, absolutely. And when it comes to the job piece, it is nice to be in the position where you have something that's stable. So you have the safety and the security, you're making uh money, uh, so you're not because that too can be really unsettling um and dysregulating to the nervous system if because like we are wired for safety and survival. So if that feels threatened, then of course like your health is gonna be impacted a hundred percent. Uh so yeah, you if you have the luxury to have this stable job, that then you can use your time off to look for something to look for another opportunity that is gonna be more aligned, then I would say absolutely do that. Like you are never stuck, yeah. Exactly, yes.

SPEAKER_01 36:27

I you know it's interesting. I've heard like I think it's Gen Z, they are the first generation that is not looking at the workforce as a career. Like I'm Gen X, where I I'm still part of like the mentality of like baby boomers, and even beyond where it was like, oh, you stayed at one job your whole career. Um, so I'm very much outside of like what my generation does in terms of leaving a career. Um, but Gen Z are very like, oh no, like we have a job to pay bills, and then on the side, we might do something that we enjoy. And I I just love that. I I'm sure there's like maybe a middle ground between constantly having different jobs, but like the idea that your job is just a job to like pay the bills for safety, right? That that lower level, uh, but then leaving a little bit of room for what you enjoy doing, right? And so you don't necessarily end up taking your job so seriously that it keeps you up at night and you're stressed, the FL and like you're just like uh, you know. So I'm like, I love that that they're able to like evolve a little bit with because I know like I listened to like baby boomers and the silent generation, and they're like, No, you gotta stay at a job for 30 years, and I'm like, why?

SPEAKER_00 37:44

No, you don't no, that's that that's so true, and I love that. And I actually had not heard that, so thank you for bringing it up. And for our parents' generation, that was the norm. You stayed somewhere your entire career, unless you get fired or you move something, you know. Um, but I think that it was very looked down upon if you were hopping to job from job. So if you do, then your next employer is looking a possible employer when they interview is looking at the resume, like, why have you moved jobs five times? Like red flag, and now it's so much more accepted that you bounce around, you stay somewhere for you know a year, a couple of years, you move on to the next thing. So I think that they really do have an opportunity there.

SPEAKER_01 38:27

Yeah. I just know when I went to college, um, I really taught or chose teaching. I did love working with kids. I always have, even when I was younger, like that was just a thing. Like I just loved working with kids. So it was a natural like job, you know, choice or career choice, but I was not thrilled about it. Um, partly because I wasn't um I was very meek. I I wasn't like a public speech, I didn't like being in in front of people, so it was kind of a stretch for me, but it was good. Um, but I mainly also chose it because it was a stable, stable job that I knew like you're always gonna need teachers, you're always gonna have kids, and so I just was very like safe. And I feel like part of my leaving the profession was that I outgrew that need for safety. Obviously, I mean I went to a complete opposite where it's just like very volatile. Although I'm at a place now where I don't worry about money, but like it's still like I still don't know. I don't have like a hundred percent, you know, um confidence that like it will always work out. I mean, you know, you never know, but I feel like I evolved to a place where it was like, okay, that's not my main priority anymore. Probably because I am safe, you know. I I I'm not like I don't worry that I'm gonna go bankrupt. Um, but like it's also like uh an evolution of like embracing volatility and um yeah, I I don't know, and I always was like, how how at 18 am I supposed to know what I'm gonna want to do at 50? Like, and certainly as I'm coming up on 50, I'm like, yeah, I've outgrown teaching and I'm happy that I've been able to like pursue another career, still in the helping profession, but yeah, people absolutely right.

SPEAKER_00 40:15

And I mean I went to school, I went to college and just got a journalism degree thinking that I was gonna write for Health and Fitness Magazine. And as I was going through the program, I said to myself, absolutely not. I do not want to be chained to a desk and be put on these deadlines. I want to make a lot of money. So I went into outside sales and realized right away that knocking door or going door to door, selling copy machines, I mean, that's not what I wanted to. I wanted to get into pharmaceuticals or medical equipment sales, but you have to start at the bottom of the barrel, that's for sure, or at the bottom of the totem pole and work your way up. And then I just realized like this is not what I want to do. Either well, I got fired from the second place. Let's call it what it is. And luckily I had my personal training certification that I could fall back on. But yeah, I don't think that I would have stayed in sales had I not been forced out. And, you know, during that time, my dad was really encouraging me to go into insurance, like property casualty, because he ran a sheet metal manufacturing company. That was his main career, but he always did life insurance on the side. Now, my brother does life insurance. My uncle, this is interesting. He was an electrician, got burnt out, but like he had, I think worked it was a union job. So he had the benefits and you know, probably a pension, all of that. So he was able to leave being established and having, you know, made good money. And then he started a second career, probably in his 40s, selling farmers' insurance and did really well. And then my cousin, he took over, he got his insurance license and started a business. And my uncle, when he retired, basically gave my cousin his book of business, and he is so successful. So my dad was always like, Go into insurance and you'll write your ticket because you're always gonna have that book and you're like recurring payments. So, like you're not really doing any uh technical work and you're just making this money. So I decided not to. My mom, who was in the education system, you'll appreciate this. She always said to me, Marcy, be a speech pathologist. You will write your ticket with that. You will always have a job. You can work for an agency, you can work for a school district, you can work for a hospital. So when I was trying having this kind of like quarter life crisis, deciding uh I don't think I want to be a personal trainer for the rest of my life, what am I gonna do? I did start taking classes to go back to school, either for nursing or speech pathology. And then I shadowed one of her co-workers, and I was like, nope, don't want to do this either. And then for the nursing track, it was gonna take me so long to complete the prerequisites because there was like a waiting list and all that. I'm like, I don't want to do this. So yeah, I kept with the training and now here we are. So well, like evolves, uh, it does. And that's and just like this conversation as always. They always take the detours, but I think you know, to sum it all up, uh, you're never stuck, whether that is with your health, your fitness, your physique, your life. Uh, there are always things that you can do to improve, but it does require taking the scary leap, the messy action. It's the only way around it.

SPEAKER_01 43:35

Really is. And I think it's even if it's a bumpy road, it's worth it, you know. I mean, I not a day goes by that I regret leaving teaching. Not a day. And every time I go sub, I'm like, yeah, this was the right choice. Um and I know I won't sub forever. Um this is just for right now, and I enjoy it because I get to see friends. At some point, they're gonna be gone. like you know the it's gonna just evolve um but yeah like every time I'm just like yep this is absolutely what I want to be doing and and who knows where I'll be in five ten years and I'm open to whatever you know wherever this path leads me but yeah you always gotta stay open to possibilities and just let the universe take you where it's going to yep because it always it always does work out even if you can't see it and you are wondering like why is life happening to me I always say you got to flip the script and say how is this happening or trust that it's happening for you. For you yeah I love that yeah that's always a saying I like yeah what what can I get out of this you know I mean what what is this teaching me?

SPEAKER_00 44:44

How can I be a better person human coach whatever through this even like you know we sometimes we chat about our clients you know even like a difficult client's like okay this is just an opportunity for me to sharpen my skills as a coach you know if I'm having a hard time or you know it's like okay so there's a there's something for me to learn here right so like I you know for the most part really enjoy what I do because I get better at it you know and it's a growth opportunity as well like not only are you possibly learning a lesson but it's asking you to step into this next version of yourself so to speak so is that setting the boundary having the hard conversation which can be really uncomfortable but it's only going to make you stronger and more resilient in the long run. Yeah so I think yeah sum it all up always have your foundations in place and that is going to move the needle the most know that hormones peptides even GLPs they're the icing on the cake um and yeah just really audit your environment so audit your external environment but also make sure that your internal environment is optimized um if not then it is going to be more challenging to get the results that you want and any of these kind of magic pills that you think are going to be the key and you know could be making things worse.

SPEAKER_01 46:14

Yeah I will just say there is no magic bullet.

SPEAKER_00 46:17

No sorry if there was you and I would be rich rich women but exactly because why do things the hard way right like I'd just be selling you the magic bullet I know I promise promising so all right all right my friend good chat I'm sending you love that things continue to improve you too I know you're on your own journey here too it's yours is a longer runway than mine.

SPEAKER_01 46:46

Yeah so well well I mean I think yours is gonna be a long runway with your grandma that's that's true yeah that's what my long runway has been yes you're right so I think I'm thinking like we just gotta get my mom home and then we go to phase two whatever that is so I was saying one one day at a time yes but absolutely I even break it down when you're really in the thick of it one minute at a time one hour at a time and just ask yourself what is the next right decision.

SPEAKER_02 47:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:19

And also this chew will pass.

SPEAKER_01 47:22

I may not know when but it will yes a hundred percent so yeah okay all right my friend all right we'll talk soon have a great week everybody yeah bye