Midlife Musings
Unfiltered conversations about the real challenges of navigating midlife
Midlife Musings
Episode 22: Things We've Changed Our Minds About (Fitness Edition)
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Some of the things we believed most confidently about fitness we’ve now completely changed our minds about. In this episode, we're getting honest about the fitness myths and half-truths we used to swear by and what we believe now after years of experience, research, and working with real women in midlife.
In this episode, we cover:
- The hard truth about weight loss. It’s simple, but not easy. And it is more challenging for some than it is for others, for a multitude of reasons that go beyond “not wanting it enough”
- Why lifting weights and walking, as great as they are, aren't the whole picture when it comes to true health and what else needs to be included
- How our thinking around what "healthy" looks like has completely evolved, and why health is no longer something we measure in the mirror
- Why more volume in your training doesn't equal more progress, and how we've shifted our approach to get better results with less
Loved this episode? Leave a review, share it with a friend in midlife, and follow along for more real talk on health, fitness, and feeling good in your body at every age.
Connect With Us:
Happy Sunday. Happy Sunday. I panicked for a moment. I was like, it's Sunday, right? It is. Getting lost in my days.
SPEAKER_00Still getting lost in your days? I remember a couple of weeks ago you thought it was a Friday when it was a Monday. Is that what it was?
SPEAKER_02Yes. You're yes, absolutely. Not quite as bad, but yeah, definitely. I kind of panicked yesterday because I always do um private episode for my clients, and I want it delivered Sunday morning. And I totally missed last week because I didn't know what day it was. And yesterday I thought it was Sunday. And I was like, oh my god, I missed it again, but I didn't. So we're we're closing the gap. Okay. I'm only a day off, not a whole week. Yeah, that is good. So how are you doing this week?
SPEAKER_01I'm doing well.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, uh, it was uh an interesting week because you know, I was supposed to have another dog sitting job that I am doing. It was supposed to be at someone else's house, which is what I usually do. And they texted me kind of at the last minute. Plans had already changed once, and then they changed them again and said, Oh, by the way, we decided to put our house on the market and we're gonna buy a new one. So we have to do all the prep work to get the house listed. Right. So you can't be there with the dogs, and like, we'll only need you to Tuesday. And then this is I'm talking to the husband who is a realtor in the area. So I mean, he knows everything that needs to be done to like put the house on the market. And he said, I will come get them on Tuesday, and then I'll board one of them. I'll drive the other one up to my mom's house, which was gonna be somewhat close to where they were being or where they were going, which is Tahoe. And I said, Well, I don't mind watching the dogs at my house if you're okay with them staying in a very small space. He's like, Oh, that would be amazing. So I said, sure. So he dropped the dogs off to me, which is a big golden retriever and then a medium-sized golden doodle. They are the sweetest. I love these dogs more than anything. But it's been a lot in a very cramped space. And the first day, both of them were well, the first the smaller one was up on my coffee table. Uh, the next day, the golden was up on my dining room table. So it's been interesting, but enjoyable nonetheless. So today's the last day. He picks them up at five. Okay. So yeah. Uh, and then I got a couple of days, and then I go to someone else's house for 10 days. So yes, it's just lots of things to juggle these days. Constant travel. That's exhausting sometimes. Yeah, it it is just because I'm having to pack up all my shit, take it somewhere else, then pack it up again, bring it home. You know, I have a day or two in between, and then you gotta do it all over again. But overall, it's fine.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00And I did have a nice weekend. I spent a lot of time with my neighbors, interestingly enough. So they're younger than me, you know, one's in her actually late 20s, another's I think mid to late 30s, but we get along really well. So I took them to my favorite Thai restaurant for dinner on Friday. I was talking a real big game. I'm like, I hope this place doesn't disappoint, but they loved it. And then yesterday we went to this country concert in the park. So we live a two-minute walk from this big outdoor lawn that's like part of the neighborhood library. Right. And so they'll have concerts during the summer. So we went there and sat on the lawn and just hung out, and it was lovely.
SPEAKER_02Yay! I love that.
SPEAKER_00I love summer for those types of things. Yes, once it starts cooling down, because it was 95 during the day, and I'm like, I don't think I'm gonna make it, but it did cool down and we had a nice time.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, it's been pretty warm down here too. Um, not 90. Did it get to 95? It was definitely in the high 80s, low 90s, which I'm hot at 80 degrees. That's my threshold. Once it hits 80, I'm sweaty. Okay, so it's not just me. No.
SPEAKER_00Like I I I literally put up an Instagram post yesterday that said, uh, what did it say? Just so you know, as soon as the temperature gets above 80 in the summer, complaining about the heat becomes my entire personality. But I'm like, is 80 really that hot? To me, 80 feels hot, but I think to other people, not so much.
SPEAKER_02But apparently, I mean, I will say I run hot normally, so that might be part of it. But absolutely, 80 is the threshold where I'm like, oh God, I'm gonna be sweaty and uncomfortable. And I sweat. I'm not like some ladies, they're like, no, I don't really sweat. And I'm like, how? Like, I don't think I drink that much water. I mean, and I stay hydrated, but at the same time, that's what people tell me, oh, you just drink a lot of water. I'm like, even on days I don't, I am still a sweaty mess. So I hate it just for that, because I just it's really hard to feel confident when you're sweaty.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, no, I totally understand that. And I'm actually the opposite. I run cold, but I get hot really easily when it's hot outside. And I am not a big sweater, which actually I think has something to do with my hypothyroidism and like my other health issues that I'm not like the best detoxer. So I remember last year when I was on another functional health protocol, I started to sweat during cardio and I was so excited. I'm like, it's working. And then now, I mean, I've been doing cardio in the morning. Um, like I would say around seven, seven thirty most days because I do not want to push it off later when it's gonna be hot because that and but even at you know seven in the morning, that place is a sauna already. So I have been sweating a little bit more. I I will say I like to break a little bit of a sweat when I'm doing cardio, not when I'm lifting. I want perfect conditions, and and I don't want to be overly hot when I'm doing cardio, but like I think it feels good to sweat.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I think people um you and I have definitely run into clients who feel like they need to sweat in order for it to be effective. But yeah, it's like a tangible, like I'm working hard, you know.
SPEAKER_00Dre, what that was like a softball for what we were gonna be talking about today, by the way.
SPEAKER_02Right?
SPEAKER_00You just like and we didn't even do this on purpose. I think it just happened. I love it though.
SPEAKER_02I will say though, I do not mind sweating when I work out. I actually, yeah, it feels good, like, and it doesn't bother me. I well, and I will say, even though I don't love the heat, I tolerate heat better than cold.
SPEAKER_00Okay, much better. Like, I I always go back and forth. I'm like, I don't know which I do. Oh, I'd rather be hot when I'm hot. Oh, I'd rather be cold.
SPEAKER_02There's definitely a little bit of that. I will just say because I've been with different in different environments with different types of people, and I will say, like, in the heat, I can be and I have been in very extreme heat, and there there comes a point where I don't get hotter, more hot. Um so it's like I'm already hot, like where I have watched people go into like heat stroke where that won't happen to me. I I don't know, I don't necessarily I don't know how extreme it has to be. I just remember being in Cancun once and it was like triple digit. We were out in the middle of a jungle, and there's pictures, and you could just see the sweat dripping down, and I was fine. Like, I mean, it was just like I'm already over that threshold, like it's hot, but cold, oh, I will bitch your ear off about how cold I am every 10 seconds and everything hurts and I'm dying.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00And it's also this time of year where it's really hot outside, but I will keep a long sleeve, not jacket, but cover up, let's say, in my car. Because if I go into the grocery store or to Target, which I had to go before we started recording, like I know it's gonna be freezing in there and I'm gonna be uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_02I get it. Yep.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I guess anyway, I can talk about this forever. We will I was gonna say we I could talk about this forever, but I'm sure we're boring the listeners with the weather chat. Yes. So okay, so we get into it.
SPEAKER_02Let's get into it. We're gonna continue last week's conversation about things we've changed our mind on, but this will be fitness edition. You want to start us off? Sure. So I'm gonna go big. I this is a big thing that I have changed my mind on. Um, and I'm really like grateful that I've had enough mentors to help me change my mind and be okay with changing my mind because I really kind of came into this space with this idea that fat loss, I don't want to say is easy, but like kind of is like easy for everyone, meaning like you just need to do the right things, right? And like have no nuance really around understanding genetics and how that influences things, um, how it influences your appetite. Obviously, like we've learned more more with GLP1s and that many people struggle with food noise. Something I don't think that if you don't really struggle with it, you realize is so problematic, right? Um, socioeconomic factors have a huge impact on what you eat, uh the quality of the food you eat, right? Uh resource availability, um, your environment, you know. I mean, those things have a huge impact. And I really think I was naive in the beginning in terms of, oh no, no, you just, you know, this is easy. Like you're just not doing what I'm telling you to do. Um and and I think there is a simplicity to fat loss, but at the same time, there's so many things like impacting it that I really didn't have the I didn't have the knowledge to understand and take into consideration. So that's been huge, I think, for me.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, simple but not easy. And I think as a coach, that's really powerful that you're able to admit that because it gives you more empathy and understanding for your clients. Because there have definitely been times where I'm like, uh, this is so frustrating. It's not that hard, you know, to like make a good choice when you go out to dinner. But again, I understand not everybody is the same. And I think that you and I are probably wired a little bit differently. And I know my mom says this to me all the time. She's like, Marcy, you are not normal. Like, I know, I know. Um, and you know, part of it is because I set my environment up for success. So I don't put myself into situations very often where I am overly tempted. So that certainly helps. But I would say that yes, I do have more willpower or the ability to restrain more than others for sure. Um, but to your point, what you were saying about even from like a genetic or internal landscape perspective, yes, some people do have stronger hunger cues and less satiety cues. They are genetically more wired to have food noise. And so that is absolutely going to make it more challenging because they can't necessarily as easily or at all, at least in the beginning, override those sensations.
SPEAKER_02You know, and part of I think where my change of mind happened was just having more um interactions with different types of people. And I remember in particular talking with my previous coach, and he was just like, I have no desire for like junky food, like it does nothing for me. And I was like, wow and you know, and having more conversations with him and even doing my own just like research, like, yeah, some people just aren't wired for like that dopamine hit is just different for some people. Um and so then it's you start to kind of look around and go, Oh, you know, people who are let's say like bodybuilders, um, I bet they just have a different um like reward system in that like they don't need they're just not as susceptible, right? Which is why they can be so uh susceptible there. And like you sort of alluded, like you and I are probably built a little different, like, yeah, I feel like too. I've been with people who can't help themselves in terms of like saying no, and I'm like, I I mean it's not like I don't like appeal, you know, like where my coach was like, I don't have there's no appeal, and I'm like, okay, that's very you're that that does seem pretty extreme.
SPEAKER_00And the other thing, and I don't know if he's always been like that. I know for myself, and this has been really interesting, and I would actually like to talk to someone who is more of an expert in these GLP1 medications because I admitted, I don't know however long it was ago on one of our episodes that I was on a GLP for a brief period of time when I was going through that health protocol. And it's interesting because ever since then, my desire for highly palatable junky food has, I don't want to say completely gone away, but it is greatly diminished. And not to say that like I used to be someone who had really intense cravings or anything like that, no, but it's just so much less now than it ever was. I don't know if it's because I just don't give into those things as much. And so what I was gonna say about it, it's Aaron that you're speaking of, right? Um, you know, has he always been like that, or is it because, you know, once he became more of like a bodybuilder himself or just immersed himself into that lifestyle, into that way of eating, that because he is eating such simple and not highly palatable food, that his reward centers got a little bit rewired. And so, because if you are constantly um kind of like hitting that dopamine center with those types of foods, then that reward pathway is always going to be turned on. So then you're you're gonna continue to want it and to crave it, especially if you were someone who was already more wired towards that. So, like, is it a little bit of both where he's just not that way in general? And then because he now lives this lifestyle, it's like yeah, it's just not even on my radar anymore. But please believe, when I was younger, oh I was eating that stuff all the time. I mean, I was a junk food eating kid. So it hasn't always been this way. I also really quick, one more thought. I also wonder if the reason it is easier for me is because I can't have gluten. And I choose not to eat dairy, so like you know, that very rarely will sneak in. But if I was able to eat gluten because I wasn't intolerant to it, would I have the I don't want to say would I have the ability, that's not the right verbiage, but would it still be as easy for me to avoid those tempting foods? Or is it like it's just completely off limits? So I I don't crave it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, like if that makes sense, yeah. You don't have to even think about it. Like it's an okay, yeah. Yeah, which you know is an interesting conversation in and of itself because I have gone through periods of time or periods with clients where I tell them, like, hey, I think actually removing like alcohol in particular, but just doing like a dry January or you know, 30 days is actually helpful because then you can stop having that mental friction around should I or should I not? Sometimes it's easier to just go, I'm not gonna drink right now and then be done with it, you know. And I think with the right person, because some people obviously extremes or even restriction can just be problematic. But sometimes, yeah, that's just easier. And I have done that myself too, where I'm just like, okay, I'm not, you know, doing XYZ, so now we're done. We don't even have to make the decision. Um so I I certainly think yeah, what you're saying here. I don't know. Like, I didn't have that conversation with him to know has he always been like that. My guess is probably um partly because he is a very, and I'm sure like I I don't know how much interaction you've had with him, but he is a very even keeled guy.
SPEAKER_00I can tell.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, even in watching him and his demeanor has always been very and I don't I don't mean flat in a bad way, but yes. And so like to me, that is not somebody who is really excitable and you know, like so I am gonna make an assumption that means there's probably not this huge like dopamine hit probably with food or anything really. He's just one of those people that's very steady, and that's a great thing. Um so I I think that that might be probably more of it, but certainly I know that I feel like I saw social media posts that he used to drink. So like it's not like he never was uh indulging in you know what we would call unhealthy habits or food. Um but certainly gosh, the more you move towards food that is productive, it's just easier to stay there.
SPEAKER_00It is, and especially because you know how you feel when you don't.
SPEAKER_01Yes.
SPEAKER_00And I was having a conversation with a client uh at her check-in this past week, and she very rarely, for lack of better words, slips up. I don't even like to use that verbiage, but she is very stressed right now because she's a teacher, end of the year, and she has a lot of extracurricular things on her plate that she does, and she's been very busy and overwhelmed. And so there are these donut holes that were out somewhere where she was at a school event, and she ate, I don't know how many, but like more than she would have liked. And in the past, like maybe she would have passed those up completely. And she said, I just did not feel well after. And I she was telling her husband this, and I said, Did you not feel well mentally, emotionally because you felt guilt, or did you not feel well physically? And she said, No, it was physically. I was like, Isn't it so interesting that when we stop eating that food or food like that, our body almost rejects it when we do? It's like, oh no, this is not something I want. She's like, absolutely.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, or like the like gap between feeling good and feeling bad is so wide now that you feel it rather than like I just think so many people walk around feeling like shit and don't realize they feel like shit.
SPEAKER_00They get used to feeling that way, and so they don't even remember what it looks like or what it feels like to feel good.
SPEAKER_02Yes, so they move away from that, right? I mean, and this is the wonderful part of coaching is like you start to help someone move away from that, and you know, like little by little they're feeling better and better, and like they don't realize how far they're going away from where they used to be. So, yeah, whenever there is like a I don't I think you're right, I wouldn't call it a slip up, you know, it's an intentional, like, no, I want to have the donut, I want to have the pizza, and they have it, and I mean, clients tell me all the time, oh my god, I feel terrible. Like, I I can't believe I felt like that all the time. And I'm like, I know, you know, like you just didn't even realize. And now you can see how far you've come, too, how great. Because sometimes that's intangible too. We forget how bad.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, so uh somewhat similar on that note, I have a client who uh gets very hungry after more intense workouts. So she does orange theory, which is very high intensity, and she notices that she is ravenous on those days. And what's interesting about that is because again, everybody is different when it comes to how certain things affect them from a hunger perspective. But I saw a post yesterday from this guy who I mean, he's not a bodybuilder, but he's very athletic, jacked, muscular, trains his ass off. And he said that you know, when he trains really hard, his appetite actually diminishes. And I know Brandon DeCruz, I don't know if you follow him, he talks a lot about the studies where the more movement you do, the less hungry you end up being. I think that is certainly the case for me. You know, when I'm walking 10, 10,000, 10 to 12,000 steps a day, when I'm training four days a week, like I mean, yes, I'm eating a good amount of food, right? It's not like I'm eating 1200 calories. If that was the case, then I would be ravenous. So I'm sure that has something to do with it as well. But I don't feel this insatiable hunger, even on the days where I'm training really hard. Whereas for some people, whether it's intense weightlifting or more cardio, and that used to be something that I guess I've changed my mind on, and not even from personal experience, just from what I had heard in the you know research that oh, card uh cardio more long duration is going to increase appetite. And I just don't think it's true across the board for everybody. Yes, for some, but uh, yeah, it's not the case for every person. So it's kind of like knowing thyself and then also knowing your clients. And one of the reasons why she was struggling with adherence before she started working with me is because she didn't have that awareness to like put the pieces together. So once I was able to start the conversation and ask her these questions, she was able to come to the conclusion that, oh yeah, on the days I go to Orange Theory, uh I want to eat the house. So we put a strategy in place so that that didn't happen anymore.
SPEAKER_02Yep. Yep. I would agree. Definitely. Like people's appetites are just they're gonna be influenced by your genetics and whether, yeah, more exercise makes you more hungry or not. I mean, it can go either way. I mean, I definitely feel like the more active I am, as long as it's not super intense, my appetite, yeah, kind of diminishes. And part of it is because it means I'm just moving around a lot and I'm not thinking about it. Like when I'm sedentary sitting around in the house, believe me, I'm like, hmm, what can I go? You know, I find myself at the fridge, you know, like um, but I think high intensity for me definitely drives my hunger up, but obviously I'm blowing through more energy stores, so yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Well, that was a good one.
SPEAKER_02Yay, okay. You can go next if you'd like.
SPEAKER_00Mine will be that walking and lifting is enough to be healthy. I shouldn't say healthy, I should say like to fully optimize your health. And I used to swing on the complete opposite end of the spectrum where when I started my fitness journey, I was doing mostly cardio and only because I didn't know any better and I didn't have weights available to me. I remember seeing my dad lift weights, but for some reason it didn't register. And so all I knew to do was grab my mom's Kathy Smith VHS tapes and start doing those, thinking that that was going to make me lose weight. Um, and then I would say, oh, maybe middle school is when I got a membership to a gym and I did start lifting, but I was still doing a lot of cardio at that point as well. So it's not like I still believed, like, oh, cardio is the only thing that I need to be doing. I was blending both. And then at some point I would say, oh, my mid-20s, again, like research was coming out saying, oh, if you do any cardio whatsoever, it's gonna increase your cortisol, you're gonna kill your gains, you're not gonna gain any muscle. So then I swung to the complete opposite end of the spectrum, and all I did was lifting and walking. And then when I turned 40, things started to swing back more in the middle. And it's like, oh no, you got to be doing what I call the trifecta. So lifting is gonna be your foundation for gaining strength, building muscle. It has so many other benefits, which we've talked about at nauseum. But if you want your heart to be healthy, then yes, you do need to be incorporating cardio. And you know, there was this woman, her name's Jen Sinkler. I don't even know what happened to her, but she was a very prominent finger in the online space. I would say, ooh, 10, 12 years ago. And she coined that phrase, um, oh god, like just lift weights faster for cardio. And people totally jumped on that. And now it's like that has been completely debunked because um, yes, you can get your heart rate up lifting, especially if you're doing more high-intensity activity, but it does not have the same effect as doing longer duration bouts of cardio. So once I realized that, I was like, oh, I'm definitely leaving, you know, not gains on the table, I guess health gains on the table. Um, but yeah, so I started incorporating that and I actually feel way better for it. Do I like doing cardio? Absolutely not. I dread it every single time I go. It feels like the longest 45 minutes of my life, but after the fact, I always feel really good. So I am glad that I started to incorporate it. And then of course, continuing to walk as well.
SPEAKER_02Agreed. I I have a whole section here, like on cardio, uh, as things I've changed my mind on. Um, and certainly uh cardio doesn't matter. I definitely was in that camp for a while, and then um cardio kills your gains, no, it doesn't. And you know, that actually um part of my change in mind with that was when I was also working with Aaron, because at some point my gains were actually being held back by you know not having a better cardiovascular health. And it's like weird because you don't think those two are, you know, helping each other because uh, yeah, there's a lot of like uh misinformation that like, oh yeah, cardio kills your gains. Actually, it's like if I'm out of breath and I'm you know lifting heavy, like I am going to be limited by you know my lung capacity, my heart capacity, my VO2 max, right? And so it was like, oh yeah, we need to start doing some cardio if we, you know, you're at the basically he was like, you're at the point where your gains are going to be limited by cardiovascular endurance, right? And so it would behoove you to add some cardio in if you would like to, you know, break into that next level. And it was like, oh, okay, that makes sense, rather than just, you know, we're burning up muscle. No, you're not.
SPEAKER_00I mean, right. Especially if you're eating enough as well. And let's be honest, take someone who's deconditioned and make them do a heavy set of Bulgarian split squats, they are gonna be gassed.
SPEAKER_02Yes, yes. Especially like any lower body stuff that you're taking to, you know, a pretty high intensity, you're absolutely gonna be limited. And you know, part like so. For me, um, I'm not a typical female in that like I'm have a stronger lower body. I've always just been much stronger upper body than lower body. Um for whatever reason. I mean, I remember starting CrossFit and I could press more than I could um back squat.
SPEAKER_01Oh, interesting.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, so um lower body stuff has just never been fun. It just it's such it's so hard. I like I really have to like I'm actually the same.
SPEAKER_00I'm very weak when it comes to my lower body. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02But like pull, I can do pull-ups, I maintain pull-ups even when I'm not necessarily training them. Like um, I can do you know, multiple of them, push-ups, love doing push-ups. I can do like 25 in a row, weighted, whatever, like all that stuff. Love it. I'm great at it. Ask me to like do a hack squat and I hate you.
SPEAKER_00I I am, I will say, I am really grateful that my gym doesn't have a hack or a pendulum squat so that I don't have to do it. The last gym that I went to for about two years, it did. I'm not even kidding. I wasn't strong enough to do the pendulum squat, it was so heavy. Yeah, they're heavy. Oh, they're so heavy. Yeah, and you know, my back was like really bothering me at that point as well. So I think that had uh that contributed, but I'm glad that I don't have the option for either.
SPEAKER_02I actually found my gym has yes, the pendulum and a hack, and it has like a 45-degree leg press and a lying leg press. And I've been playing around with a lying leg press, and that just puts me in a very advantageous position for my anatomy as well as my back, where it is just all quads. And I think too, I've also just gotten out of like my own ego, out of my own way to be like, it's okay if I'm not putting stacks of 45s on here, like um, and really kind of leaning in lately, especially because of my back. Um, very slow and like paused, let's say a line like curl where it's like a four-second descent, hold for two seconds, and then you know, oh my god, you can just absolutely destroy yourself with lightweight.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because the the body does not know weight, it just knows tension. Yeah, and you can put tension on it with lighter weight as well. Yeah, so anyway, so going back to the cardio conversation, yes, so it's going to help with your capacity during your training sessions. I think it does help with your recovery.
SPEAKER_01100%.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and then to your point, because I know you were in a building phase when you were working with Erin, and cardio does help with nutrient partition partitioning. So if you are not doing cardio, then you're abil like you're gonna be less insulin sensitive. You're not gonna be burning fat as effectively, and so you are at a greater risk for more, I guess, fat storage or just like insulin issues.
SPEAKER_02I think what people will hear, I think, in both of these episodes is that number one, there's nuance that needs to be considered, but also like it's always gonna come down to I don't I don't love the word balance, but kind of, yeah. Like, do you need to strength train? A hundred percent, especially the older you get. Do you need to do cardio? A hundred percent, especially the older you get, you know. Do you need to walk? Yes, absolutely. Like we're we're actually very much um built for, you know, a lot of that, you know. I I've actually noticed lately because of uh my mom being in the hospital that I'm getting like 12 to 14,000 steps because I'm having to walk to the car in her room, and you know, uh there's just more work, more walking happening, not on purpose, just it just does, right? And like sure, my feet sometimes get sore or my ankles or whatnot, but like I can obviously handle a lot and it doesn't necessarily really um tank me, you know. So, anyways, it's it's all of it, like it's not just one. We you kind of need a little bit of everything in in tandem.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so one of my in-person clients, she's 78, and she unfortunately was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Oh, so yeah, it's it's awful. She's still coming to see me, which I appreciate. You know, I mean, this woman is amazing. She and her husband, he just got diagnosed with cancer. So they both had cancer before. This is his second round, and then now she has Alzheimer's. They run a very successful demanding business, and she is like, nope, I'm gonna keep doing this, which good on her. But where I was going with this is when she met with her doctor, she did say, I'm working with a trainer, I'm lifting weights. She's like, Great, continue doing that, but you need to be doing five days a week of cardiovascular activity as well, which my poor client felt so overwhelmed at first. She's like, I don't know if I can do it. I was like, meet yourself where you are, you know, do what you can. But yeah, cardio is really important for your brain health. And that is one of the reasons why I started it as well, because 40 was around the time that my dad started getting sick, and I already had dementia, Alzheimer's, heart disease in my family history. So he's like, You better believe that I'm gonna do everything I can to protect myself from that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, for sure. That's taking responsibility for what you can control, right? I mean, you can't control your genetics, but yeah.
SPEAKER_00Genetics loads the gun, environment, lifestyle pulls the trigger.
SPEAKER_02Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00But all right, you're up.
SPEAKER_02All right, um, I have some more cardio ones, but I think actually I'm gonna go another direction just because I think we killed the cardio one. Um so definitely have changed my mind on what fit and healthy looks like. Um because for a long time, I mean I was just like, I want abs, you know, and like I've always been a healthy weight. Um, although I I mean I was very underweight when I was growing up, but that was like not really because I wasn't eating, like I actually had quite an appetite. I just was burning through energy like crazy. That was just the type of metabolism I had when I was younger. Um, but certainly as I got older, I was like very like physique focused, and like that can get really disordered really fast. Um, and I think also the messaging, like you and I are I mean, I'm I think six years older than you, but like we still grow up in the same time when we got the messaging that like thin was it, and like the skinnier the better. Um we don't realize that what we're seeing in social media, in just in the movies, like celebrities is not healthy. And I mean, I think we're like back to that now with this craze with GLV1s, and like I'm just watching celebrities waste away. And I'm like, so when do we say something? Like, when do we say, uh, I'm gonna stop liking this person's posts because you know, are we just pushing them, you know, to an unfortunate place?
SPEAKER_00Like it's just well, and and you you know that there are gonna be tons of comments on their posts. Oh, you look so amazing, body goals, you know. Yeah, so that's just reinforcing it. I made a post on Monday, and it was very off the cuff. It was a talking head reel, just saying how concerned I am for our younger generation, and not just because of the GLPs and what that is doing, and the fact that we are seeing these celebrities, like you mentioned, waste away before our eyes, and what is this the message that that is sending to younger girls? But I work in a gym where I am seeing these kids, so I'm gonna say junior high up until college, you know, early mid-20s. And what they are doing is wild to me. So, oh gosh, junior high kids drinking 200 milligrams of caffeine energy drinks at five o'clock in the afternoon, the high schoolers and the college kids having those nicotine pouches. I overheard a college kid talking about a steroid cycle that he was going to be running. Uh, another one who was probably like early 20s, this was a couple months ago, saying that he was getting on a GP GLP one to like shred up for summer. I was like, what is apps, what is actually going on here? And then I posted about it on Instagram. Well, I made the post, but before that, I posted about it um in my stories, just saying that like I overheard this conversation of this kid talking to his friend, like, oh yeah, you know, our steroid cycle. And I wanted to go up to them and to be like, you really need to be careful. And also, can I have the number of your parents because they need to be called? And it's like these kids can just like get this shit easily, you know, and they're very smart when it comes to technology and figuring their way around the internet, which is so scary. Um, but yeah, it it really does concern me. And I heard of a 19-year-old girl getting Botox. It's just I know, I know.
SPEAKER_02You know, it's interesting. I saw um a TikTok this morning that was that talking about how children who were raised by mothers who had Botox have a more tendency towards what did I say? Um like I I want to say psychotic, but that's not net actually the word they use. Like because they weren't watching micro expressions, they could not be as empathetic. And so it's more sociopathic. There we go. Yeah. Behavior with children raised by moms who use Botox, and like it's crazy. We don't realize how much people are reading your face and then little micro expressions, and 19.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, 19. I think sh I heard it was because she was in a dance recital, and so the mom wanted to make sure that she looked good on stage. You know, it's really interesting to me because I went for two years without doing Botox because I really started to freak out about the health ramifications, especially with all of my autoimmune issues. And then I started doing it again about eight months ago. I'm really trying to spread out the amount of time I do it per year. So, you know, maybe once every eight months or so. I do have an appointment on July 1st, I'm going to admit. Uh, but I was watching some TV shows. This is probably six months ago when I was still going back and forth. Oh, do I do it? Do I not? And these TV shows of like girls, you know, in their teens and they all have facial movement. And it's like, isn't that interesting that facial movement can still look youthful? But in our 30s, 40s, I mean, gosh, even you know, 20s now it's happening. We are trying to paralyze our faces so that we look more youthful when it's really the opposite. I was like, oh, that's fascinating. I just don't want static lines. That's why I do it. It's not so much that I mind the movement when I'm emoting or anything like that. Um, but going back to what I was saying, I had shared that on Instagram in my stories, and I saw or someone replied to me and she said, Yeah, I'm seeing this too. And it's called looks maxing. And it's happening with a lot of guys, more so even than girls. I was like, oh, that makes sense. Yeah, but it's scary.
SPEAKER_02It is, it is absolutely scary. Um, I'm gonna wrap this up to say I think part of like this change for me has been that fit and healthy can look a variety of ways. And like lean doesn't always mean healthy, you know, like we're seeing now, lean could be um you're in an unhealthy place, as well as having more body fat than maybe society says is you know, attractive does not mean that you can't still be fit. And so I actually started to move away, I don't even know how long ago now, a couple years now, from goal weight. I mean, I'll if a client has a weight, I will say you can tell me that, but what I'd really like is to understand like what is your what's the look you're going after because who cares what the scale says, because that's gonna fluctuate, you know. Like if we're really trying to build a physique, then let's figure out what that looks like. And then also guiding them to say, hey, FYI, you know, for women, anywhere between 20 and 30 percent body fat is healthy. This is where we see the best health outcome. So we really want to stay within that and then understanding if you want to be on that lower end, do are you really willing? Because it's a lot of work to get there and then to stay there. Like it this is not a like, oh, I achieve and then it's easy to keep. It's not, and so it's like thinking broader, but also again, healthy looks, it can look a variety of ways, and yeah, uh yeah.
SPEAKER_00So no, I agree with that. Also, I'm not gonna mention names because she is an internet friend and colleague of mine and yours as well, but she's been speaking out a lot about, you know, make just be careful of who you're following because some of these fitness professionals or influencers who they do stay really lean year-round. They're likely not divulging everything that they're having to do. And it's probably a nightmare to maintain that. I actually disagree. I think it can be true for some, but I think that there are some people who can maintain a leaner physique and still be healthy and also not doing it in a risky way where they're overexercising, they're under eating. Again, it all goes back to genetics, and every person is different. So, to your point, as you've mentioned a couple of times, yeah, there is nuance to all of this, um, which is why you've got to be so careful on social media because so much of it is smoke and mirrors. You don't know with certainty what's really going on behind the scenes. So you've got to follow your intuition as well. And just, you know, keep your blinders on, you know, make sure that you are getting your lab work done, that you're listening to your own biofeedback, and yeah, responding accordingly.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I will add to that. Um if you are seeing very lean females online, it is highly likely they are unhealthy, even if they're trying to present it as healthy. But I agree with you, it does not mean everyone is, but then I also tack on they are the exception, not the rule. And so do not set yourself up with the exception, you know. She, I'm I'm thinking of someone we both know, I think is absolutely the exception. I don't think she's unhealthy mostly. Um, but that is not typical.
SPEAKER_00And I am never self-I'm confused. Are you are you referring to the person that I was referring to? I mean, I don't know specifically who you're no, I don't I don't think we're talking about the same person because this person who I'm referring to is speaking out against the people who are maintaining, yeah, a very lean physique year-round and saying, like, oh, this is just so easy for me. Got it.
SPEAKER_02I'm thinking of someone we both know who is very lean, I think extremely lean for uh a female. Um I don't think she's being unhealthy, I but I do think she's the exception. Uh, I would question a few things, but I don't think she is. Oh, I'm gonna follow exactly what she's gonna do and I'm gonna look like her. You will likely not. She is an exception, she's a rarity, I think.
SPEAKER_00Well, you're gonna have to tell me who that is offline because now I'm here. I have no idea who I have no idea who you're talking about. No.
SPEAKER_02Okay. I'll tell you. Yeah, because I don't want to bash them. I really like her. Um yeah.
SPEAKER_00Well. Okay. Any others?
SPEAKER_02Um Um, no, that was really it. Like I said, I have I had one about hit, but I think that kind of goes under cardio.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And I think the only other one that I would say is the amount of volume that you need to make gain, so to speak. I mean, I used to be a volume whore. And I would I would have someone like very uh what's the word I'm looking for? Smart people like Brett Contreras. What Brett Contreras wrote my programs for a very long time. I was a part of his group, and I would take those and then I would add more exercises to them. Because like, oh no, this isn't enough. Only two sets, nope, I need three or four. Only four exercises, nope, I need five or six. And no wonder why I wasn't getting the results that I wanted because I was doing too much. And so now, again, like I am kind of a research junkie, I should say. And I follow a lot of different accounts where they are talking about the new studies that are coming out. And it is amazing how much less volume you need to do to not only maintain your muscle, but to actually build it than we once thought. It was, you know, what, like 10 to 30 sets per week. And now it's you can build muscle on as little as four. And that's for fractional sets. So a fractional set is gonna be if you're training your back, your biceps are a fractional muscle group. So it's really interesting.
SPEAKER_02Um, and you know, I'm actually living that right now because life is very abnormal for me. Um, I had already I it I didn't do it intentionally, but I looked back and was like, well, I guess I have moved myself down to three times a week. I I have been a four-time a week gal for years. Um, and it just I can't make it to the gym that often with my mom in the hospital and caretaking for my grandmother. Um and I'm fine. I mean, I'm maintaining, am I like making gains? Not really. I mean, how can I when like my mind is not in it? It's not that I don't have enough volume, um, but certainly pulling one day has not done anything. This week I didn't even realize I only went twice. I and I was sure I had gone more than that. And I was like, well, I guess that's what this week was because time just got away from me, and you know, I'm still holding steady.
SPEAKER_00Like I'm well, I think even two days can be enough to build when you when you are doing the right things. So when you are eating enough, when you are taking your sets, you know, close to or to failure, because I'm part of Jordan Lips's group program, and he has options for two, three, and four times per week. So that is clearly showing that it's a hypertrophy program. And you know, he does say, like, is this gonna be optimal? No, not necessarily. Yes, a little more volume likely is better, but you can still build muscle even with two days per week.
SPEAKER_02I think what's missing, you know, in that part is that like going to let's say two days, right, allows you more bandwidth to increase the intensity. Because I don't think you can get away with two days at half ass where you're just like the motion, right? So I want to be clear that like, you know, if you're someone who only has time to do two times a week, that's you you can absolutely yes, make progress, make gains, you can maintain as well. But like you have less room for error in that, like you gotta get in the intensity, you know, like you cannot just have like a and I think that's actually what's been beneficial for me going from four days to three days is that four days was kind of burning me out as I was trying to do everything, and like just dropping down to three has allowed me to be present and like push harder than trying to, you know, um spread that out over four times, right? And so we can't like I don't want to lose that message, like the intensity gets a little more important because you're losing out on opportunity with volume.
SPEAKER_00So well, that's so true. And I'm really glad you brought that up because with my clients, the ones who I do write programming for, which isn't everyone, I typically am not having them only do two sets because I know that they are likely not bringing the type of intensity that is needed. And you know, that's no knock on them. I just don't think a lot of people understand how to really take it to the house like you and I do. Um, so and I still do like a little bit more volume. So with Jordan's program, everything is only two sets. I feel like I'm eating enough, I'm recovering well enough, I have the time that I can do three sets and be totally fine. But yeah, if I was to put someone who doesn't know how to take a set to actual failure, maybe they think it is, then I would err on the side of three sets instead of just two.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00No, no more than three, not like four sets. I mean, you could, but yeah, I would say three is probably better for that type of population.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02I think in this case, you're doing like uh a mass program, right? Um, and so that's something to consider too, is that because you have the knowledge and wisdom, you can alter it to go, oh, I am capable of more. Whereas if someone were writing it specifically for you, they might have actually included uh three sets instead of two, you know what I'm saying? Because they understand your capacity and your, you know, whatever your goals are. So that's something to consider too. But if you don't have the knowledge to do that, I would I would still stick to the program, you know, mostly as is and watch watch biofeedback, right? Unless you have maybe a coach looking over your your shoulder.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, do as I say, not as I do.
SPEAKER_02Well, you have the like credentials to do that, right? To step outside of the lines, you know, and and the body awareness, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I think to that point, like I actually try to encourage the three to four times because I don't think that most people have the intensity. So I am gonna lean on volume because I I I just don't think the average, let's say, female who has not lifted and not trained is gonna go into the gym and do two days effectively.
SPEAKER_00No, no, and with you know, the so I have four in-person clients right now, and one of all of them train with me two times per week. Another one does one day on her own, but I trust, and she knows who she is because she listens, that she is pushing herself hard enough. Uh, the other women, because they're only doing two days, like I'm pushing them hard. Even my one who is 78, like she is taking her steps almost to failure and in in a safe manner, right? Like we're doing everything with machines, so she is stable and all of that. Um, but she loves it, right? And and she can push herself that hard, so she's willing to. She's like, oh no, don't hurt me. I this is too challenging. No, they're loving it, which is great. I love that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's like a great like plug for either having a trainer, even if it's just like once a week or once every two weeks, just somebody because that's gonna up your game. Just having someone to perform for, even though that's not the goal, but certainly having someone watch you. Um, or you know, having a workout buddy, you know, for spotting or you know whatnot, but like you're just gonna push a little harder when you have an audience, and that can use it to your advantage. I miss that. I miss that from CrossFit, my CrossFit days is like having the audience to push me, you know, not when people were watching me, but you were doing it as a group, right? So it's like, oh my god, I want to keep going. That also worked against me as a very competitive person.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it's interesting because I I am very competitive with myself and yes, with others, but I don't like being put in an environment where I'm being competitive with others, if that makes sense. So when I was doing the power lifting, it was a group format and I hated it. I did not like other people seeing me lift. I mean, when I was getting hitting a PR, sure, but when I, you know, failed to set, no.
SPEAKER_02Oh, I loved it, but it absolutely was not uh a good healthy space for me. Yeah, I'm way too competitive. It was really hard for me to just like have a day where I was like, I'm gonna pull back where I can do that now that I train on my own, and like, you know, that that's my ego. I 100% um can admit that and know thyself. So I took myself out of CrossFit.
SPEAKER_00Smart move. And I bet you're getting better gains because of it, aren't you?
SPEAKER_02You know, a hundred percent. This just works better. You know, people will tell me, like, oh, I don't like going to the gym alone, it's boring, you know. I'm like, oh, I got a whole competition going on in my brain. Yes, you know, like I and with myself, it it's not that I'm like competing against somebody else in the gym. I I don't even know who's around me unless they come talk to me, which PSA men stop talking to me in the middle of a set.
SPEAKER_00Why? I know one of my like gym friends, I love the guy, although he did back into my car yesterday and dented it. Super bad. I know, right? Uh, so he will be paying for that. Yeah, I was doing my cardio this morning. He was in there and I was getting off the step mill to go do my jump roping because I was going back and forth. And like, right as I pick up the jump rope, he's like, So, Marcy, what's your opinion on what cardio machine? I'm like, John, are we really having this conversation right now?
SPEAKER_01No, no, sir.
SPEAKER_02Yes, so PSA. Not that many men listen to this, I don't think. Any, considering it's called midlife musings. Right.
SPEAKER_00But he was asking about our podcast, actually. Oh, okay. He's like, Oh, what's the name of it? Can you get it on Apple and Spotify? Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Please don't listen.
SPEAKER_02Oh my god, yeah. It's just like ridiculous sometimes the things men will say to me. And I'm like, Do I not look unpleasant enough? Like, I and then I don't know. I'm not paying attention to my face because I'm usually like very much in my head. Um, and I'm always just like, what are we doing? No, no, no, no, no. Like you would be so upset if somebody bothered you in the middle of and it's not that they're talking to me while I'm lifting, it's like in that in-between the rest time, but like I'm zoning in on and you're over here telling me I had one guy, the last guy, told me he came over, made me take my AirPods out to tell me how proud he was of me that I was using knee sleeves because he doesn't see many women use knee sleeves.
SPEAKER_01Oh, interesting.
SPEAKER_02It's just like, sir, do you not hear how condescending that is? And go away. Yeah, please.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I know. They they really have no awareness whatsoever. It's one thing if you don't have the headphones in, it's a completely other if you do, and especially midset as well. I agree.
SPEAKER_02That's why I like being there when no one else is. I know. I gotta figure out when that is. My gym seems to be I can't predict.
SPEAKER_00No, it's tough. I can't predict at mine either. You just never know.
SPEAKER_02Sometimes I'm like, okay, it's three o'clock. That's when it's you know the least busy. And then I'll go random, you know, Tuesday at three, and it's full. And I'm like, dang it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that happened to me the other day. I was like, oh, it's two o'clock, no one is gonna be in here, and it was the busiest I've ever seen. Like, go away with all the annoying college kids. So anyway.
SPEAKER_02All right, I think that wraps it up. I think it does. That was good. I this was a fun little series, and you know, maybe down the line we do another ver another round.
SPEAKER_01I think so. Because I'm sure our mind will change at some point. Yes. Yeah. All right. Well, you have yourself a good week. You too. And I'll talk to you next Sunday. Until next Sunday. Alright, bye. Bye.