We're Not Experts

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Justin Butler Raleigh Jones Episode 16

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Episode 16 of We’re Not Experts is packed with takes you probably didn’t ask for—but definitely need. The guys dive headfirst into the swirling rumors around Mike Vrabel and Dianna Russini, breaking down the alleged affair and what it could mean (or not mean) in the world of sports media and coaching.

They also shift gears to college football standout Rueben Bain Jr. and his newly uncovered driving incident—does this kind of off-field issue actually impact his draft stock, or is talent still king when it comes down to it?

And somehow, Our Lord and Savior Donald Trump makes his way into the conversation, adding more laughs to an already loaded episode.

Justin goes a little more in depth about Parallax. 

Hot takes, questionable expertise, and unfiltered opinions—just the way you like it.

SPEAKER_02

Episode 16. Live From the Cave. From the Cave. Once again, as always, it's not a cave. Not a ruin yet.

SPEAKER_01

We're not experts. I'm Raleigh. I'm Justin. That's Justin Butler, Raleigh Jones. Find us on all your social medias.

SPEAKER_02

Really, just Facebook? My ex got deleted. I don't know why. Like I just got a shadow banned out of the blue. They knew that we're not experts was gonna blow up. They really didn't want me to reach the crowd that I was shooting to get to.

SPEAKER_01

It's okay. I don't have an ex, but I'm I'm gonna. We'll just make one. I'll just make a new one. We're just gonna be a we're not experts.

SPEAKER_02

I've gotta make like three. I've gotta make like three new ex accounts. I gotta get the personal, I gotta get the we're not experts, and then, you know, parallax. That's really gonna be the one that sets this thing off. Because if people don't like anything, if they don't like the content that of us having conversations, what they will like is winning money. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I like winning money.

SPEAKER_02

I would listen to something that I don't enjoy if it resulted in me making money.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but you're not everybody.

SPEAKER_02

I'm I'm just a guy with a lab coat who sat down with his lab coat on one day.

SPEAKER_01

And became a real scientist.

SPEAKER_02

Literally, yeah. Almost like a like a software engineer.

SPEAKER_01

Sounds like a scientist to do it. I've been coding. Dude. I uh you got anything going on in life exciting besides parallax?

SPEAKER_02

I mean, I'm getting engaged. Or I mean I got engaged, so I'm getting married, but I mean, other than that, nah, man, nothing, nothing new.

SPEAKER_01

That'll be a good day.

SPEAKER_02

You got anything going on in your life?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, brother. I start a new job on Monday.

SPEAKER_02

Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_00

No more towing trucks.

SPEAKER_01

It'll be it'll mean more. It'll mean more time for the pod. Man, I'm pretty excited about that.

SPEAKER_02

We're gonna be going hard because you know, now that we have that, we can just start cranking shit out.

SPEAKER_01

It'll be perfect for football season. Perfect. Oh man, can't wait. We'll be set. Speaking of football, man, we can get into it. Do you want to go straight in? If you don't think we're experts about sports takes, wait till we get into Mike Vrabel. Oh man. And what is her name? Diana Roussini? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And it makes sense. She was getting all the scoops. It's turned out she was also getting scooped.

SPEAKER_00

And flipped and folded and tossed and turned and everything in between. No way. So we might as well get into that first.

SPEAKER_01

Before we accuse Mike Vrabel of cheating on his wife and Diana Roussini cheating on her husband, we have to say that it is alleged, even though there's photos.

SPEAKER_02

He did that shit.

SPEAKER_01

And he also came out and said that there were six people having a good time that day.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. So it actually comes to find out that maybe that they were just having a little orgy.

SPEAKER_01

Mmm. Mike Vrabel's a swinger. Is that what I'm hearing? Roussini. I mean, or maybe they were just all getting down.

SPEAKER_02

They don't have to be swinging. Because typically, swinging involves spouses.

SPEAKER_01

His wife wasn't there at the at the resort. I mean, I'm not sure. Me either. That doesn't mean what's going on.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, if I'm Mike Vrabel, I certainly wouldn't be in a hot tub holding hands with Diana Roussini if my wife is also there. Yeah, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't do that.

SPEAKER_01

You know, it's it's kind of a like, what do you think? What do you think? I he seems it seems like cheating runs in the Patriots facility. Ah, he does like to bend the rules. It seems like it seems like cheating's an habitual problem at the Patriots facility.

SPEAKER_02

And he just passed it on. I mean, you know, he was doing some questionable things in Tennessee as well. I mean, we we talked it up to, you know, just finding loopholes in the rules and whatnot. But, you know, one would expect a dirtbag to do that. I might not be a man of integrity, you know.

SPEAKER_01

Maybe not the man we thought he was.

SPEAKER_02

I tell you what, man, as a man who's uh about to get married in the near future, and with you being a man who is married, I don't know if I would call uh Mike Vabel the kind of leader of men I would want to follow.

SPEAKER_01

At least in a personal standpoint, it certainly doesn't seem that way.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just saying. He absolutely was banging Diana Roussini.

SPEAKER_01

That is not confirmed.

SPEAKER_02

Confirming it. Because here's the thing. Here's the thing.

SPEAKER_00

That's our opinion. First of all, first of all, one also agree. It makes perfect sense.

SPEAKER_02

I just it's I didn't need the pictures. You could have just told me that Mike Vrabel was fucking Diana Roussini, and I would have been like, yeah, he is. Like, bro, he's had to not only is he currently doing so, but it's been going on. Bro, absolutely. Bro, she was getting all them, all them fucking screen for in Tennessee. It was almost like she was the exclusive like news person.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Like there was no news coming out from anybody breaking news. Diana Roussini, fresh off sucking Mike Vrabel's dick. And she also seems to know.

SPEAKER_00

Reports now that there's some turmoil in the locker room.

SPEAKER_01

It also seems the places where she's not banging the head coach, she doesn't get as good of scoops. Man. That's fucked up, isn't it? That's fucked up.

SPEAKER_00

She's been saying AJ Brown's coming to the Patriots whole time is because that morning. Insider information. She's insider trading.

SPEAKER_01

He was inside her and she was getting scoops. You just know she's gone to Couchy. No free shout-outs. Man. As busting with the boys would say. But you just know she went to a prediction market.

SPEAKER_02

She went to no. We don't fuck with Couchy. We'll shout them out because it's in a bad way. She went to Couchy because she would have got flagged for that if she would have gone to DraftKings and FanDuel. So she had to go somewhere where it's frowned upon. You was somewhere it's not even called gambling. Ooh, predictions. I predicted this parlay that I put in.

SPEAKER_01

Anyways. She went to the prediction market. AJ Brown is getting traded draft day. Nah, bro.

SPEAKER_02

She had the scoop. It's not draft day. They can't. It's too early. It's got to be a post-June 1 cut, post-June 1 move for cap space purposes. Ooh. We're 10 days out from the Turns out, turns out in the Super Bowl, they weren't going to feed Diggs because they didn't want him to eat and have to keep them because they needed AJ Brown. They knew a better option was coming. Speaking of which, there's a theory out there that says AJ Brown's not going to leave Philly. Ooh. It's probably an Eagles fan saying that.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, I could I could see AJ Brown not leaving Philly. Maybe he wants to bang Diana Roussini too. Maybe. Maybe it was just all a Kevin Petula problem, and he knew that. Maybe. Maybe he knows the problem's gone. So he's back.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but Jalen Hurts is your quarterback. He wasn't exactly like, I mean, they kind of stopped feeding him even before that. I mean, you know, he wasn't reading the book on the sideline with him.

SPEAKER_01

He reads a book on the sideline. That's a guy who went in the locker room. That's a guy. That's a guy that's gonna be a good thing. He's not dialed in. It's a guy that's gonna bring the team together. That's right. That's a guy. He said, guys, we can all sit back and read if y'all want to. That's a guy that you can you can ask. Like, how do you do it? He's gonna be like, I'm just relaxed. I'm reading a book. He's like, you should check it out.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I mean, who who else in the middle of a football game wants a good book recommendation?

SPEAKER_01

Dude, he's completely locked in on the game.

SPEAKER_02

You know, one thing they should have asked him was how much reading do you do in your personal time? Or is that just like an on the clock kind of thing? You know, is that like the equivalent of like boss makes a dollar, I make a hoop on the clock?

SPEAKER_01

It is crazy, isn't it? Because if it was at work and I just pulled out a book and started reading. I'd probably be in some shit. Like it's not gonna go over well. Like, what the f what are you doing?

SPEAKER_00

Bro, I can barely like I can barely pull out my phone without somebody looking at me sideways, and I work in a phone store.

SPEAKER_01

Oh man, I just you know, it is he kind of gets he's getting paid an incredible amount of money. Man, I I do not get paid an incredible amount of money, not even close. Like the people might even be like, that's an incredible little amount of money.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, look, especially for the work that you do, very hazardous, very hazardous, but you know, we're on the greener pastures. We are, man.

SPEAKER_01

I'm excited about it.

SPEAKER_02

Man, we're hey with no free shout-out, so we can't say their name, but I am going to be looking forward to being like, hey man, I got a 12-pack of if you want some, come get it. Yeah, yeah, right.

SPEAKER_01

And I'll be like, all right, bet. Yeah, I'm gonna don't worry, I'm gonna go to corporate as soon as I get in there and be like, hey, I got a thing going here. I just you know, I want to get you in early. I want to get you in early before it blows up, and you you want to get in here and sponsor the pie. Woo! Oh bro, if they did, I'm like, dude, let me my pitch is gonna be like, look, this is gonna we're in this together. This is gonna sell you so many items that you sell.

SPEAKER_02

You just don't understand these. This stuff's gonna be flying off the shelves, and we're gonna be dropping exclusive coupons that don't work just for people to get it there. Yeah, and they'll they'll get there, get it, and they'll be like, Oh, I got this promo code off, we're not experts, and then it's not gonna work. And they're like, Oh, we already got it here.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I might as well get it. Right. Yeah, it's genius.

SPEAKER_02

One thing we can do is some shady marketing, shady, we're men of high character and integrity in the real world, but like sometimes when it comes to putting your name out there, you gotta do some things that could be seen as egregious.

SPEAKER_01

Hey, look, I mean, in today's world, that's not that crazy.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, we got my vets. No, I'm not the political person, but I don't know why I thought about this. Did you see? Did you see the picture my man Donald Trump put out with him as Jesus?

SPEAKER_01

No, bruh. You want to do that?

SPEAKER_00

When he came out and he said, I thought I was a doctor for the Red Red Red Cross.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, because the doctor of Red Cross has light coming from his hand as he touches the guy's forehead. What the fuck are we doing? What the fuck is going on, bro?

SPEAKER_00

Hey, bro. So I want to tell you nothing's gonna make up for the cost and gas than some Jesus. Man, it wasn't even Jesus. This man put face swapped with Jesus.

SPEAKER_01

He did a face swap with Jesus.

SPEAKER_00

Oh my god, bro.

SPEAKER_01

That's gotta be in tears over here. When I tell you, when I tell you, when I read that shit, I thought it was fake. I thought it was too, bro. I said, I said, well, there's just no way somebody would let this happen.

SPEAKER_00

And then I saw the fucking press conference of him talking. The fact that he had to talk about that is crazy. I said, dude, there's just nobody would let this happen.

SPEAKER_01

Nobody would let this get posted. You think he made that shit himself, like on Chat GPT? He said, All right. He said, I already have my excuse for when people come at me, but he gets under Chat GPT and he says, he says, All right, ChatGPT, make me facewap me with Jesus healing a man. And I think I haven't completely looked over the photo, but I think people said there's like angels or something in the background. Yes, dog. There's like jets and yeah, it's just insane. It's incre it's incredible. It's whoever's idea that was to do that, it's not great. It's not great, it's not a great look. Bro, that shit was that shit was hilarious, dog. The fact that my man did that, it's almost as bad as Mike Vrabel banging Diana Roussini, man.

SPEAKER_02

And you know, back to the Diana Roussini thing, it kind of makes sense, bro. She was fucking Mike Vrabel and then getting on the air saying my husband's average.

SPEAKER_01

No way.

SPEAKER_02

I don't tweet, I don't tweet my husband because he's average. She did not say that. I swear to God. She said, if my husband was a 10 out of 10 or some shit like that, I'd I'd overpost him too. But he's just average. And then they posted a picture of him.

SPEAKER_01

Is he average?

SPEAKER_00

I mean, I guess, you know, I mean, I wouldn't, you know, he looks like someone who has money.

SPEAKER_01

Oh no.

SPEAKER_02

But he doesn't look like I mean, I would think I would consider him probably in a an above.

SPEAKER_01

Is that not a divorceable statement?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I mean, dude, look, if my wife gets out there and says some shit like that about me, like I'm supposed to be the best thing walking. I'm I'm hurt. You're supposed to be sending your friends pictures of me face swap with Jesus. Like, like that's who I should be the best.

SPEAKER_01

My wife went out there and said that about me, bro. I'm hurt.

SPEAKER_00

Man, that means you'll I feel like if you tell me that you don't like attract, you're not attracted to me. Man, I should be a 10 out of 10. You went to work and said that shit. Bro, you went to work.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00

I'm not even real work.

SPEAKER_02

Like, you're not even like a like a face like that. Like, you know, like you're there, like you're there for like reports.

SPEAKER_01

She'd be like, breaking news, Jackson Dart.

SPEAKER_00

You took your five minutes of FaceTime to the world to talk shit about me.

SPEAKER_01

Man, it's oh that's some cold shit.

SPEAKER_02

Man, and you know, what do you do in this situation if you're the spouses?

SPEAKER_01

I mean, oh man, that's the million dollar question. Because if it's if it's anything like Mike Vrabel said it was, they would have already known.

SPEAKER_02

Well, now they're like bro, she's under investigation. Oh, from the investigating her, like, bro, she hasn't like from where she with, like the New York Post or some shit like that, or well, Outkick, one of these media coverages, whoever she's with, the athletic, maybe, yeah. I don't know. Yes, bro. Like, she's under investigation. She hadn't had a story since. Yeah, well, there's probably Mike Grable shut down a press conference. Yeah, he was like, No, I'm not fucking doing it. I feel him. I wouldn't want to talk, I wouldn't want to talk about an affair, bro. Here's my thing with it. The fucked up thing about that shit is is I mean, you know, even if he is cheating on his wife with the reporter, who cares? At the end of the day, they're just normal people with jobs.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

It ain't like Mike Rabel's her boss. He's feeding her fucking insider information. That's no different than any anything in the world.

SPEAKER_01

It just makes it, it's it makes it worse because they're both public faces, right?

SPEAKER_02

But who gives a fuck? If anything, for me, I'm just looking at it like Diana Rossini reports on the Patriots. I'm like, uh, she just got that off some stick.

SPEAKER_00

Like, like, you know.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it does affect it, it affects uh it affects it affects Mike Vrabel as a as his character. I mean, he's like a mole. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Now it's like, fuck, we can't have shit because our coach is out here feeding these sources the bullshit. Man. And then you come in here, guys. I don't want to.

SPEAKER_01

My my thing is I will say this though, it's not like Robert Kraft's gonna look at this situation and care.

SPEAKER_02

Right, yeah, for sure. I mean, I mean, this my man's was out here getting rubbed off at massage parlors, right?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, he's not a it's not like he's a stand-up guy, right?

SPEAKER_02

I mean, yeah, I mean that's why he's not in the hall of fame. Him and Bill. Mike too now, I guess.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, yeah, Mike's cooked.

SPEAKER_02

It's just crazy, man, because it's just like I wonder how much this is gonna make people like outside, like people love Mike Brabell. Yeah, no, this will affect that. My fiance loves Mike Brabel. And if I go home tonight, I'm gonna ask her. I'm gonna say, Do you still love Mike Brabel? Are we still think highly of him? And if she says yeah, I'm like, you might you might go fuck a reporter. Jesus, I probably wouldn't go that far. I didn't mean that, but you know, what are you up to?

SPEAKER_01

Bruh.

SPEAKER_02

I don't support dirtbags.

SPEAKER_01

He he has definitely shown that even if it even if they didn't cheat, this is still a dirtbag activity.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, but I think the thing is, is I just feel like he I mean he asked. You could have played it off like most of you weren't in a hot tub with the reporter by yourself. You can't say six people were out here enjoying their time. And it was just two. And it's just you and Diana. Well, let me guess the other four were out at the bar grabbing a drink, just got out.

SPEAKER_01

I think I think both, I think your fiance and my wife would both consider holding hands with another woman anywhere, right? Especially a hot tub, bro. And not only that, it's cheating.

SPEAKER_02

Not only that, bro. Who the fuck hires a private investigator to look into Mike Vrabel and Diana Roussini? Yeah, it's gotta be one of their spouses, right? You would think you would think I have a conspiracy. Might be Amy Adam Strong.

SPEAKER_01

She hates him that much. Might be Amy Adam. She knew she was really atop of this.

SPEAKER_02

Because she was she was he knew why she was getting all the scoops. He was like, they had a meeting one day, and he's like, that's why he got fired. Because Amy wanted Mike to fuck her. Oh shit. You need to knock these cobwebs off.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my god. Why is Diana Roussini getting all these scoops? I was really hoping you were gonna be like, yeah, it turns out Amy Adams is really, she's really, you know, a good person. I don't like Amy Adams drunk either.

SPEAKER_02

So I'm starting. She's having an affair too. Is she even married? Yeah. I think so. Well, she's not gonna be anymore. If her husband listens to this, he won't be. I have insider information.

SPEAKER_01

It's fake news. As Donald Trump said in his tweet, only fake news can conjure this up.

SPEAKER_02

Oh man. Anyways, moving on. We got another interesting story. Let me hear it, man. A Ruben Bain is under investigation on the back end now for the football team questioning his character, I guess.

SPEAKER_01

Is this like a I don't I don't even know what you would say. Is this like a a crash out? Absolutely. Postponed? Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, unless he crashes out because of this, absolutely not. Because the intel that I've gathered, like, don't get me wrong, I'm a Miami Hurricane fan, so I probably didn't dive all the way into the specifics because I don't want to find out that somebody that I'm cheering for did some dirtbag shit and pulled a Rasheed Rice.

SPEAKER_01

Right. You don't want to find out he's Mike Vrabel.

SPEAKER_02

Right. Yeah. Or what's my any Georgia athlete. And but so from what I could see, he got arrested. He got uh like you know, maybe ticketed for careless driving, but someone got involved in a crash that he was driving. And he was in a coma and passed away. But he didn't get in. I don't I don't know, like that's the thing is I don't know if he got into a wreck. Like, I I don't have all of the specifics behind it.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. Well, look, hey, look, we do have a little, there's I mean, there's a little bit of data, and this is gonna be fucked up. So don't, don't, people at home, don't take this to heart. He is an athlete for Miami. I'm saying, all I'm saying is we have a little bit of data, and players that were driving cars where they killed somebody, and they turned out to be pretty good. Jalen Carter's solid. It's a solid football player. Henry Ruggs didn't get that opportunity. Should have done it in college. He wasn't very good though before he crashed the car. I don't know, bro. He was nice. He wasn't great. The statistics don't tell you.

SPEAKER_00

He was in Oakland. You know who his quarterback was? Who was it? Uh uh. I think we've gone a couple episodes. Is it Derek Carr?

SPEAKER_02

I think he did play with Derek Carr. I don't know. Did he? Yeah, I think he was a rookie the year Gruden got fired, wasn't he?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, he wasn't there for the he wasn't there for the big Derek Carr breakout. He just had to go 156 miles an hour. Yeah, it's crazy.

SPEAKER_02

I think my thing with it is with the Ruben Bain thing, is if he didn't actually do anything insane, like if he wasn't speeding or drinking or you know, anything like that, it sucks if he slides because you know shit like that happens. You know, people get in accidents, people get into wrecks.

SPEAKER_01

I just don't understand how we're just now hearing about this.

SPEAKER_02

And you're right, because I don't even remember hearing about this in 2024. Are are people are people so I've done zero? But it's all kinds of shit comes out. It's draft season. So like there ain't no fucking telling what's about to come out over the next 10 days. I'm sure somebody got raped.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, like the definitely oh man. There's definitely somebody in like the 20 range drop this story.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, you think it was David Bailey?

SPEAKER_01

Somebody who's gonna be a big thing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying it's one of these guys that's trying to climb. No, I'm saying it's a team that's picking in like from the 20th to the 30th pick. We want to get a guy. And they're like, we really need an edge rusher that's worth a fuck.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_01

They're like, look, he already has tiny arms. Like, we throw a little, oh, he killed somebody in a car crash story out here. We can get him.

SPEAKER_02

Well, it's funny because, you know, I wasn't necessarily going there with it, but I was thinking, you know, it would make sense if the Tennessee Titans did some shit like that to get him in the second. That's true. That'd be nice. What if it comes out to find out that the leak for that information was Robert Salah?

SPEAKER_01

Where are you at with character concerns and players? We want a high character guy. Is is it is it a is it a as a Tennessee Titans fan, we can we can kind of relate to the guy that's a little off the chain. And we've had a little bit of this in our past Pac-Man Jones, right? Script club. Yeah, I know you remember the script club.

SPEAKER_02

There's a difference between doing it once and like 15 times, you know. Pac Pac-Man was kind of like a habitual dirtbag.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but he gave us one of the greatest sound bites ever. Say it for the people. He's like, Roger, don't want me to go to script club. He said, I'm gonna go to the script club. He said, I love the script club. Hey, shout out Pac-Man. Hey, shout out Pac-Man Joe. And he was nice, he was a dog, nice, great returner. If I was his coach, I'm like, hey, bro, go to the street. If this is what you need to do, yeah, to be the guy, then you fucking you go out there, brother.

SPEAKER_02

I think for me, with the character concerns, it's dependent on what kind of character concerns that we're talking about. So, like, there are some things you can chalk up to like a kid making a mistake. Right. You know, like in some cases, like in this case, speeding. It's a bad decision. It's a bad decision. But we sprother, I have a ticket going 92 and a 55. I have a great. I had that at 19. So I've sped before.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I got arrested. Right. Yeah. For racing. For racing. Yeah, right. I did not go to Georgia. Didn't I have a chance? Didn't even get an opportunity to be on the University of Georgia's football team.

SPEAKER_02

Right. But you know, now if it's a George Pickens character concern where I'm sitting over here and I'm watching my man's trying to fight people on football fields, that's different. You know?

SPEAKER_01

I'm with it.

SPEAKER_02

I don't want to Aaron Hernandez.

SPEAKER_01

That's a major character concern.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, we nobody thought he was gonna be a killer.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. There's definitely you ain't never heard those stories where a dude I bro would tell people on the field I'm gonna kill you.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, like they're all like, I shit. He meant that shit for real.

SPEAKER_01

Man, can you imagine? Yeah, imagine, but I'm just saying you find out, you're like, damn.

SPEAKER_02

But we're talking about a guy who is just like off the fucking rails versus somebody who was doing some reckless driving. Yeah, you know, if a one like Jeffrey Simmons had that thing that made him fall along with the ACL.

SPEAKER_01

What was it? I think a DV? I think, yeah. We could say domestic violence.

SPEAKER_02

That's a one-time thing. That could be a one-time thing, you know. Good people fuck up sometimes too. I agree. And he's and he's shown, here's the thing: if you if we would have said, oh man, he had to slip up as an 18, 19-year-old kid.

SPEAKER_01

As a guy that's been given a second chance in life before, I think that second chances are necessary.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but you get that coming out of the draft. I don't want to see a 26-year-old man beating him up, but I don't want to see a Ray Rice situation because you you know better.

SPEAKER_01

You know what the craziest thing about the whole Ray Rice situation was? He beat the fuck out of her.

SPEAKER_02

It would have been cool if it was on camera. That was the problem.

SPEAKER_01

That was the problem, brother. Dude, did you he only got suspended like what two games when it initially came out?

SPEAKER_02

And then they then he then the video came out, and they were like, actually, after second, after upon further review, and they were like, oh, this is way worse than we thought it was.

SPEAKER_01

And it was it was real shit, yeah. It was way worse, it was way worse than anyone ever would have anticipated.

SPEAKER_02

And it kind of sounds awful saying that, but you know, it does like it doesn't really it doesn't really justify. When until you see the video of it, like you know, if and she would have been like, especially the fact that she wasn't out here, you know, oh he beat the fuck out of me, da da da da da. Like, just like yeah, it happened, I forgive him, dah dah. And it was like, Oh, okay, cool, why forgives him, we forgive him. And then it was like, Oh shit.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, there was like he knocked your ass out. Like, there's no forgiveness.

SPEAKER_02

You yeah, you could have had like some brain damage behind.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, they're like, This dude should probably be in jail, right? Like, you should not even probably, like, he should be in jail. Like, it's it's clearly not a butt you know, uh uh, guess what?

SPEAKER_02

That wasn't the first time, that wasn't the first time he did that shit. It wasn't the first time.

SPEAKER_00

Anybody that's gonna knock that girl out like that. That's a that ain't the first time. You don't do that.

SPEAKER_01

It's probably not gonna be the last either.

SPEAKER_00

Facts.

SPEAKER_01

Like he swung on her like again, no, like he swung on her like this was something that was regular. Man, like he was like he like like they went to the boxing gym together. She took that better than what I would have, bro. My head might have fell off my shoulder, bruh. Fucking CTE, I swear, she got just as much CT as Ray Rice got with that one. That one, it's not funny, it's not funny. But I'm just saying, like that was a hard hit. That was a rough hit. Yeah, bro.

SPEAKER_02

But if you know, if you do that shit, if as bad as it sounds, as an 18, 19, 20 year old, you know, you get to redeem yourself from that because you get to chalk it up to always a kid. Yeah. When you're a grown ass, when you a man's man, when you a 28, when you're a mid-20s, after you done been a man for a while and you're an athlete and making all this money, you know, you you you know better. You shouldn't be doing it.

SPEAKER_01

And hitting a woman's kind of a different scenario, but yeah, I mean, we don't condone that in any aspect. But driving a car fast as somebody who's done it and been caught, you know.

SPEAKER_02

I drive again. I drive the speed line. I bet uh have you raced since zero times have I raced. I bet you I can tell you somebody who did. Jalen Carter.

SPEAKER_01

Uh he I don't know if he was racing. He just might have been driving fast. Rasheed Rice. He's a racer. Jordan Addison. These are all guys that should be considered for Crash Out of the Year, but I think we have our winner already. I don't know if anything's gonna top my boy James Pierce and his five felonies. Man, insane work. It's crazy. Is there uh is there some type of is there some type of uh draft news you got? You got any scoop on draft news?

SPEAKER_02

Just 10 days away, man. That's all nothing really, nothing really like it's pretty exciting. Yeah, bro. It's that time of the year where everybody's about to either like be over the moon, super excited, overly optimistic, or they're gonna be real pissed off.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, this is like the part of the year where fantasy starts to come back, especially if you're in a dynasty league. I know I don't know about you, but I took a long layoff from fantasy. I didn't, man.

SPEAKER_02

I've been doing victory laps every chance I got.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's a good feeling, probably.

SPEAKER_02

Somebody talk shit about me in the chap or the chat. You know what I come in there and I say?

SPEAKER_01

How are you gonna disrespect the champs unit? I would be doing the same thing. How? I didn't. I took a I took a layoff. I've been off probably I probably haven't even logged into Sleeper until the other day for like a month. That's interesting.

SPEAKER_02

What have you been doing in fantasy in your mind in since then? About anything, anybody's on the bank, anybody you're targeting? You know, I know you and I aren't making any moves together, so you know you can tell me.

SPEAKER_01

I yeah, no, so I we still could make moves together, but no, I'm probably I've considered trading my first round pick away and just completely shifting my focus to 2027. A lot of people are doing that. There's some there's some receivers that I like in this class, but I don't think they're gonna fall to me.

SPEAKER_02

Where do you pick? 13.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah. I picked 13. Yeah, so there's a good chance I'm not gonna get anybody worth the fuck. I'm gonna be stuck drafting fucking Mike Washington. You know, he'll probably get drafted too.

SPEAKER_02

There's some solid, there's some solid options, man. See, I don't have a draft pick.

SPEAKER_01

I don't have a draft pick next year either. I you know, so I I I told you I thought that there was a there's I think that there's three really good wide receivers. I think that there's I mean, I don't know if they're Jamar Chase, Justin Jefferson, Puka good, but I think that there's three really good wide receivers. Put them in any order you want. Doesn't really affect me. So Tyson, um Lemon, yeah, and Tate.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And like my favorite out of those three is Jordan Tyson.

SPEAKER_02

You just I just it's you just don't love his injury history.

SPEAKER_01

You don't. You absolutely don't.

SPEAKER_02

And that's and that's big for you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I uh you're you're I just think that I think he's the one with the most upside.

SPEAKER_02

I can see that.

SPEAKER_01

I think he's the one that could be the the Jamar Chase type or the Justin Jefferson type, or I just yeah, you don't love his injury history. I Malachi Lemon scares the shit out of me. I mean his I don't know, bro. Talking about character concerns, he just looks like he's on demon time. I swear. Oh no, he's gonna probably be pretty good though. He is yeah, I I agree. I would probably put him second and then Tate third, but to be honest with you, I think you could put Tate first, and I wouldn't really argue with you.

SPEAKER_02

But then I think everybody has Carnell Tate. I mean, I don't love the 40 time. I mean, but I also like I don't I'm not a big oh combine guy. It's not like you know, you turn on the tape.

SPEAKER_01

CeeDee Lamb ran a four or five, too.

SPEAKER_02

Right. And you turn on the tape, and I mean the thing is, like you say, when you separate, like the separation is there. What what have you done on film against elite comp? And buddy, he's done it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_02

And he did it with Jeremiah Smith of Basodum 2.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, not just Jeremiah Smith. JSN.

SPEAKER_02

Like I had a memory pop up today, it was actually kind of funny. Um man, I actually may be able to be a better GM than a lot of these GMs. I should have said I said we should draft JSN at 11. What did we not do? We didn't. We could have had a dog.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but nobody would have been throwing to him. Oh, that is true.

SPEAKER_02

It was I mean shit. Gino's throwing the fucking JSN to start the emergence. Gino Smith's the reason why DK Metcalf got up out of there. They're like, fuck it. We don't need him.

SPEAKER_01

We got I mean we got JSN. That's partly true, yeah. He but you you knew. You just it's something, dude. It's Ohio State and LSU. If they go in the first round, buddy, you might as well take the bet. It's a good bet. As long as they got the dog because Parallax Parallax would tell me that that's a good bet.

SPEAKER_02

Speaking of parallax, give a little bit more insight, man. We're getting closer and closer. I don't know exactly how far out we are from an official release. But you got early release? You got early access to it? I do.

SPEAKER_01

Can I tell you my favorite part of it? Tell me your favorite part. There is look, this is for the dirt bags and the dirt bags only. But I'm so glad he put this in there. I didn't want to. It's it I know you didn't, but your boy, your boy's a he's a parlay guy. There's a tab. You guys don't see it yet because you don't have access, but there's a tab on the left-hand side of the screen. It says parlays. It's three down. It's four now. It's four down now.

SPEAKER_02

We have a my bet section above that that you can tell. So like you can go in here and tell this parlay and it'll put it in your bets.

SPEAKER_01

Buddy, it it just you can get three legs, five legs, seven. You can get a long shot, 12 legs.

SPEAKER_02

It's you can build your own parlay with the picks. Bro, we've really it's really crazy to think, dog. Like, I've really just been, and you said it, you said it to me as kind of like a joking way, but it's really true. Like, bro, I got in my bag with this, and like I just just it was like, you know, most people get in their bag for a minute, then they hop out of it. It's like I got in the bag, and it was just like it, I just realized that the bag was a lot deeper than what I expected. He can't crawl out of the bag. Yeah, we're just stuck in it. Like every day, bro. I add something to change something to make it better. And a lot of people that know about this, they really think that it's just, oh, this is just picks. Like it's just a guy selling sports picks, right?

SPEAKER_01

But dude, like which which is a common thing on social media, right?

SPEAKER_02

And it's not even, it's not, it's that, like, that's essentially the core of it, but like what you can do with this is incredible. So, like, just to kind of give some people a preview, because you know, the world's not gonna care about it until it's a thing. But the people that are tuning in right now, I'm just gonna tell you some of the things that you can do briefly. So you log in, you got your command center. When you walk in there, that's gonna show you how many bets we've got for the day, our overall win rate, our winning streak. It shows a profit and loss trend. So, like it's got like literally like a line chart where you can see if we're moving up, we're going down, we're staying stagnant, what's our win rate looking like, what's the mix of our bets, how many picks do we have today, what our bankroll looks at, how much value that we have, what seasons are in what sports are in season, which ones are out of season. Yeah. You got the picks, which obviously that's gonna have all of your picks, but you can it's gonna show you you can sort it by sports, props, games, tiers as rankings on the bets. If they're live pregame, you're one, lost, you've got my bets. And and this is really where it starts to get down to like the this is what's more than just me giving you picks. So you get the it's not just telling what I'm doing. You as a user will be able to go into this and every pick. You don't, I'm not saying pick all like for today, 29 bets. I'm not saying get in here and pick all 29. You go through here, you pick the ones that stand out to you. There's a button on it, it says tell. You hit the tell button, what does that do? It tracks that in your slip, in your porf, in your my bet. So it shows your history, what's your active, what parlays you have. It shows your dashboard. You got your parlay tab, which we've got mixes of three legs, five legs, seven legs, twelve legs, custom parlay features. You've got your near edge feature, which that'll show you picks that also the model thinks has some edge, but not enough to classify it as a pick.

SPEAKER_01

And and describe edge for the people that don't know what you mean.

SPEAKER_02

What this is is we're not necessarily a hundred percent predicting that whatever the thing is is going to be the outcome of the game, which that is a part of it. It is a significant part of it. But the edge is it's looking for the value of the line compared to the probability. So if the book has an implied line of minus, let's just say it's minus or plus plus 120, right?

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_02

But my model projects that this has a 70% probability of hitting, it calculates that the odds should be minus 200. So it says this is a good bet because we have value against the book.

SPEAKER_01

Right. Which is what you're looking for.

SPEAKER_02

That's what you're looking for because, like I said, this isn't for the parlay demons. This isn't for the ones that want to take $2 and turn it into $20,000 in a day.

SPEAKER_01

He's speaking to me directly.

SPEAKER_02

I'm speaking to a lot of people because guess what? You're not the only every person that I have given early access to has not placed a single bet off of this from the straits. Every one of them's been a parlay. Right. And that's not what this is for. This isn't this isn't your typical guy in a Discord that's trying to hit five plus twenty thousand every day. This is more like the stock market of gambling.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

That's the best way to put it. We're investing. So we're gonna take your bankroll and it's designed. So whatever you want to put into it in front, whether it be a hundred dollars, five hundred dollars.

SPEAKER_01

So if I yeah, right, like your point is is like look, even if you bet five dollars only, go in and bet five dollars on these single legs, straight bets, and win seven, win eight, right.

SPEAKER_02

And then win twelve, win fourteen. I mean, bro, like I've been giving it plus two twenties.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, take that eight dollars and then bet it on another single bet.

SPEAKER_02

Right. Or, or you just put your hundred dollars in and you put $100 in bets in at a time. We're just mad, we're just betting in volume and wanting to hit at a profitable clip. Right. And we're gonna do this, it's set up literally, it's designed for nothing but your long-term success.

SPEAKER_01

It is the smartest way to bet.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, and not only that, it starts even getting deeper. So we got the arbitrage page. So this runs, it's not, it takes too many calls, but every time it checks, it scans for lines that don't equal 100% probability amongst books. You can come in here and you take $100, and you know, it'll tell you to bet both sides of the bet where to bet it at, and you're gonna you might bet $50 on or $22 out of $100 on one side and $77 on the other side, and you might only win three or four dollars on it. But guess what? That's a guaranteed three or four dollars. It's guaranteed money. And we're taking this money and we're growing our bankroll. And let's say you start out with a hundred dollars. When your bankroll goes from a hundred dollars to a hundred and fifty dollars, your unit size recommend recommendation at one percent goes from a dollar to a dollar fifty. And then when it gets to two hundred dollars, and so on and so on. So this is designed to scale with you by being successful.

SPEAKER_01

So what he's basically telling you, you can track all this. Is don't be a dirtbag. Yeah. Please don't be a Mike Vrabel.

SPEAKER_02

I want I want to see the people win. And that's where this, like, this is really like the best way for me to describe it, and I think he can attest to it.

SPEAKER_01

And so so don't hear what he's not saying he's not don't hear what he's not saying. Don't he's not guaranteeing you parlay dubs. Right. That's not what he's doing. He's telling you that if you put in straight bets, you're gonna hit more times than you're not, and we're gonna make money consistently over time. Right. So don't be a me.

SPEAKER_02

And when you and by doing that, there's like what how could you lose? By not hitting the bet. Like all you have to do, all you have to do. I mean, but I mean, you're not, but so like you're not gonna ever blow your account.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_02

Because when are you ever going to lose that many bets? There's gonna be a day.

SPEAKER_01

You're gonna win it. No, check me out. There's gonna be a day, and it's gonna happen in football season, and it's gonna be the Packers versus the Browns. Remember this situation we were talking about the other day.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And Parallax might not get this one right. And I'm like, Parallax is saying Packers. I feel like it's the Packers. I think we're gonna put the whole bankroll on this bad boy. We're not doing that.

SPEAKER_02

Because it's you're literally if you just follow the rules, you know that you're not betting that much.

SPEAKER_01

But you know me, man. Rules are meant to be broken. So I'm gonna be the guy that does it, and then I'm gonna hit you up. I'm gonna be like, yeah, what the fuck, dude?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, and I'm gonna probably cuss you out. You told me.

SPEAKER_01

You told me that well, you didn't tell me, but Parallax told me. And this is why Raleigh v. Parallax is gonna be a thing. Man. With it's being introduced today. It'll start in week one because we don't bet on fucking pre-season football because we're not disgusting. Yeah, we have some dignity, we have self-respect for everybody that's betting on Korean baseball. Hold on, now I feel attacked. Pre-season football. All right, he's gonna be able to get it. You you know what about me now. You need to be stopped. You should call 1-800 gambler because you're a psycho.

SPEAKER_00

He's talking to me. You know how that feels what he fails to realize that.

SPEAKER_01

That's why I feel every time you talk about parlays.

SPEAKER_00

He fails to realize that the KBO and the MPB and EuroLeague basketball are all also coming to parallax in time.

SPEAKER_01

You know what? It's the one thing I hope doesn't happen.

SPEAKER_02

It probably won't because you can't bet player props on like FanDuel and shit like that.

SPEAKER_01

You shouldn't be able to bet on it at all. I promise you, if you are up at four in the morning watching KBO, you don't have to watch it, you just gotta bet on it. Yeah, well, that's even worse. But if you are one of these people that somehow manages to watch a Korean baseball game, stop it.

SPEAKER_02

Bro, some of the stars for tomorrow are in the MPB and the KBO, bro. That's fine. The third baseman for the Blue Jays, where did he come from?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I get it. I'm saying that's that's fine, but you don't hear me talking about the UFL.

SPEAKER_02

The KBO is better than the UFL. Yeah, maybe About actual professional baseball players, though. Yeah. This is where we've gotten literally all-time greats out of Ichiro.

SPEAKER_01

I get it.

SPEAKER_02

Otani. I get it. I get I hear what you're saying. Yamamoto. Roki Sasaki's here now, brother. You can't just say Yamamoto and not say his first Yoshinobu, Yoshinibu, Yamamoto.

SPEAKER_01

There you go. It just sounds a little fucked up when you just put it.

SPEAKER_02

That's just a long ass name, bro. Well, you didn't say anything about that when I said Ichiro. That's his name. No, it's not. A Suzuki.

SPEAKER_01

No, I didn't say that. I just said his last his first name. Yeah, but he's only, I mean, come on now. Did you say Ichiro? Everybody knows who you're talking about. If I say Yamamoto, you know who I'm talking about, too. I think you're talking about some random samurai in Japan.

SPEAKER_00

That's fucked up.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, we do not have. I'm just saying, like, this guy's got a first name, too.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, Ichiro's got a last name. We don't you know how many Ichiro's there probably are now?

SPEAKER_02

There's like seven. No, there's probably like seven billion over there.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, they're with their kids above replacement rates, not that high, so I guarantee it's not. We can get into that another day. I promise.

SPEAKER_02

I promise. That's funny.

SPEAKER_01

Brother, you got anything else?

SPEAKER_02

I don't, man. I don't, bro. Just be on the lookout for parallax to all the subscribers. We're only getting better. And stop and don't ask me when it's gonna be here because the truth is I do not know. Because I'm not gonna give this to you until I'm 100% confident that this is a polished complete product. Yeah. We're not in a rush. Like, don't worry, bro.

SPEAKER_01

Like, I'll be the first to tell the world that it's out. Right. Yeah, like if you think But I want y'all to have it too. Yeah, everybody's gonna have it.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just not gonna give you something that's not up to my standard, which is high, because this started out to get me rich. Okay, this is I was completely fine with doing this and gatekeeping it. I'm glad that that's not the case. But I'm like Robin Hood. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Like I'm taken from FanDuel and I'm given to the people. Man. I thought you were talking about Robin Hood the app, but I you're not. You're up to the room. I'm talking about the actual Robin Hood.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Yeah. I'm about to pull up in my lab coat and my glasses.

SPEAKER_01

Because a Robin Hood was a man for the people. That's right. Just like us.

SPEAKER_02

The only problem is, the only problem is, no, I mean, if it was up to me, this would just be like 10 people involved.

SPEAKER_01

It's just so much bigger than that. I put a lot of pressure on them, guys. Y'all can thank me later.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, if this was up to me, the world wouldn't have this wouldn't be a thing because like I'm a dirtbag. And not a not a I'm a bad person kind of way, but like I'm like a I want to help the people that I love and the people that I love only.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_02

Because the people that don't, the people that I love love me, and the people that I don't love don't love me, so fuck them.

SPEAKER_01

Well, don't worry, brother. If it's successful, everybody's gonna love you. And then they're loving me for the wrong reason. You're gonna be a well-loved man, I promise. Ah man, yeah. That's that's it, man. Episode 16. It was a banger. We're 10 days out from the NFL draft. I promise you.

SPEAKER_02

We will have a draft live, we will record live from the draft and have it out 10 minutes after the draft. Yeah, I'm not even we're not even gonna fucking edit anything out of that. No, we're going straight. Fuck, dude. That's gonna be a long one. It's gonna be like a three-hour pod.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, should we do the whole draft?

SPEAKER_02

Uh I mean, yeah, bro.

SPEAKER_00

We're here for everybody's teams.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, fuck it. We'll do the whole draft. You heard it. I mean, we might cut out all the bullshit in between. We ain't cutting out shit.

SPEAKER_03

All right, man.

SPEAKER_01

If we wanted out, if we wanted out the same day as the draft, we're putting it out live.

SPEAKER_02

All right. You guys heard it. I apologize in advance. It's already bad enough to listen to us to for five minutes or an hour.

SPEAKER_01

Lord forbid, y'all got to listen to us for three or four. Hey, if it's the most listened to pod, we might have a new model. We're Joe Rogan in it. Episode 16. You got a quote for us? Yes. You do?

SPEAKER_02

Yes, I do have a quote. And this one doesn't come from any special person or somebody that's famous or super impactful. This comes from me. Okay. I want this a little bit deeper than what people think it is, man. Let's hear it.

SPEAKER_01

Perspective shifts everything. Man, that's it. We'll see y'all. Holler at you at episode 17.

SPEAKER_02

Like, subscribe, share, holler at your boys. We'll see y'all on the next one.