Finding Your Way Back: Pelvic Floor Therapy, Motherhood & Learning to Trust Your Body

Most women don't realize pelvic floor therapy exists until they're already struggling.

In this episode of Connecting the Thoughts, I sit down with pelvic floor occupational therapist Anna Hurka to talk about motherhood, healing, entrepreneurship, and why so many women silently live with symptoms they assume are "just part of being a woman."

We explore:

• What pelvic floor therapy actually is
 • Why postpartum care shouldn't stop after delivery
 • Pain, leaking, scar tissue, and reconnecting with your body
 • The connection between the nervous system and healing
 • Building habits that actually fit into busy lives
 • Starting a business while navigating pregnancy and motherhood
 • Why women need community—and practitioners who truly understand what they've lived through

This conversation is about far more than the pelvic floor.

It's about learning to listen to your body instead of pushing through it.

Because healing isn't about doing more.

Sometimes it's about finally giving yourself permission to receive support.

Connect with Anna Hurka:
wholepelvicwellness.com
@wholepelvicwellness_

Chapters

00:00 — Introduction to Anna's (Background on 12 years as an occupational therapist across pediatrics, rehab, and acute care leading into pelvic floor therapy)

04:54 — Navigating Motherhood and Professional Growth (Balancing post-grad coursework, motherhood, and launching a business while pregnant)

09:48 — Overcoming Obstacles and Personal Resilience (Facing fertility challenges, home displacement due to Hurricane Helene, and a difficult pregnancy)

14:42 — The Reality of Pelvic Floor Therapy (The three main functions: elimination, insertion, and physical/organ support)

19:36 — A New Mom's Perspective and Managing Care (Dealing with a third-degree tear, postpartum recovery, and prioritizing self-care during COVID-19)

24:30 — Habit Stacking and Removing Barriers (Practical home exercise integration, habit stacking while brushing teeth or waiting for groceries, and the benefits of a mobile practice)

29:24 — Trust, Connections, and Finding the Right Therapist (The importance of feeling safe, finding the right practitioner fit, and local recommendations)

34:18 — Listening to the Body and Holistic Health (Navigating IVF protocols, pregnancy preparation, therapy, yoga, and nervous system regulation)

39:12 — Building Community and Knowing When to Reach Out (Recognizing stress coping mechanisms like pulling away, and the vital role of a women's support tribe)

44:06 — Conclusion and Final Remarks (Wrapping up the conversation and where to connect with the guest's practice)

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Like in order to make a genuine connection with someone, you really do have to like go deep and put yourself out there. Because if you're just talking about the weather, you're not gonna make like real friends.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

You experienced all those symptoms, how to tear, which is traumatic. So now your nervous system needs to process that, but no one gave you the pause.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

What what was my capacity? I felt the I felt the difference. Like when I started doing both. My dreams and goals professionally are important, and I want to be able to show my kids that welcome.

SPEAKER_01 0:35

Firstly, how I would like to start is how did you become a pelvic floor occupational therapist?

SPEAKER_00 0:40

I mean, I feel like that's a long and winding road. Yes. I'm an occupational therapist, so I've been an occupational therapist for 12 years. And I've worked in like many different settings. So I've done pediatrics, I've worked in rehab, I've worked in acute care hospitals. Um, and right now I do pelvic floor therapy. So pelvic floor therapy, you can be a physical therapist or an occupational therapist. It's like postgrad work. So it's really about like skill acquisition and like the desire to do so. So yeah, I mean, I just feel like throughout my career, like many times, it kind of was like, oh, like that's interesting. Like in my clinical rotation in college, I sat in on like a whole lecture. And then like nine years ago or so, I did a class. And then like seven years ago, I listened to some podcasts and just like it just like kept like prop cropping up in my life. And then I had my son five and a half years ago. I went to pelvic floor therapy and I was reminded that I really did like enjoy it. So around that time, I started taking like a lot of classes and like like thinking about it seriously. And yeah, it's kind of been the last couple years. I've done a lot, like a lot of education and all of that.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

So beautiful. Started that journey there. Yeah, started that journey while already being a mom now. So talk about how was that navigating motherhood and you know, going and doing schoolwork to become here.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Well, let's see, uh, it's a lot specifically. I went through I was doing like a lot of I've done like a couple weekend courses. I've done like a four and a half month training. Um, I've done like a lot of different ones, and I do feel like, you know, before you have kids, you're like, you have all the time in the world. You can work full-time, you can take classes, like you can do all the things. And then you also have to like care for this human, and it becomes like a very you have to want it a lot more. How about that? Yeah, no, because it's like when am I gonna fit it in? Like it's hard. And then specifically for me, I like launched my business when I was pregnant with the eight the baby, and that was like a whole other feat alone. So just you know, you really just make it happen.

SPEAKER_01 2:48

Yeah, you made it happen, but you definitely came through with struggles here, right? Like making up that battle and getting to here to this beautiful spot here. What were some things that were coming up for? I know like time, right? Time is a huge thing for us, and you said you had to make it a priority, otherwise, it would not have got done. What were some other things that you were experiencing besides like that time constraint?

SPEAKER_00 3:10

Like it really was like a matter of there was always something else to do. And I remember sitting on the couch and just being like, if I don't do it now, I'm never going to do it. He was like, Well then just do it. And I'm like, Okay. But at the time we um were we were going through fertility like our fertility fertility journey, which has been like a long and winding road. I was we also our house flooded in Helene, so we had then been like moved out of our home. We're trying to rebuild it, got pregnant with our daughter and had a very hard pregnancy. So just the energy was not there. Um, the motivation was not there. But at a certain point, I was like, if I don't do it now, like I'm just I'm never going to do it. And I've wanted to do this for so long. And I want to be able to like show my kids like your mom like went for it. Like I was, it's like funny because I was like reflecting back the other day and I was like, I have always been a little entrepreneur. Um, like I remember I was a middle schooler and I got a jewelry making kit for Christmas and started my own business, you know, like yeah, something like making jewelry and like selling it to like all kinds of people, like friends, family. I still see people that I know like have my jewelry that I made in like high school. That's so sweet. So like I've always wanted to like be my own boss. Like, I just like I like I want to do something that I feel like is making a big difference. I've worked in the hospital system for years. I could talk all day about how terrible our healthcare system is, right? Like it's awful, and you just at a certain point, like it's like exhausting. So I just wanted to be able to do something that I felt was like truly helping other like women that I could feel good about.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

I think that we wish that everyone in healthcare kind of went in this direction, right? And just really what is it that you want to help someone with and how to like get them there and help them with their health goals and just living their life? And you had your own experiences and just to come to pelvic floor therapy, what is that experience like for you just receiving the therapy?

SPEAKER_00 5:10

I I love pelvic floor therapy because I do feel like women in general, like we we need so many services and we're not getting them. Like we're a very it's a vulnerable, it's a very vulnerable state. It's a very like private area of your body. I had a couple experiences with pelvic floor therapy, like myself before I like took the dive. And I do feel like at a there's uh periods, um, at least in my life, and I feel like for a lot of people, where you might not be able to even like uh accept like touch, like even to like putting like a moisturizer on my body, right? That could be really stressful to myself or like having my husband touch me. Um, but for some reason, like a professional who's doing it, who like who's doing like body work to like help you achieve like some of your goals is a very different experience. And I have experienced that myself, like helped me with healing. And I just feel like I want to provide that to others.

SPEAKER_01 6:05

So wonderfully. I again I always say the word wonderful or beautiful, but it really is because it's the mind-body connection, right? Like what you're yeah, it absolutely is, and it's that nervous system regulation and honoring also what your body has been through that you need to go to get some pelvic four therapy, right? That you do need that safe container to be able to go to. So, yeah, what were some things that you were experiencing in your life that made you book the appointment?

SPEAKER_00 6:30

Firstly, yes, I had my son, and a lot of women find pelvic floor therapy after they have a baby. That doesn't mean that's the only time to go to pelvic four therapy. However, like that's a very like frequent time. So with my son, I had a third-degree tear. So I was having a lot of pain, having issues with my bladder. And actually saw a local, a local therapist. Her name is Lauren Kritz, and she's amazing. So shout out to her. I so I saw after my son. So for me, with that that time around, it was like a lot of pain with my scar, um, like the healing of that, just a lot of strength in my pelvic floor. I had a lot of disconnection and really trying to like reconnect that part of my body because really pelvic floor therapy, like the goal of it is to like the three main functions I think for pelvic floor therapy are like elimination. So being able to hold it in or let it out, like when appropriate, right? Being able to have like like insertion, so tampons, intercourse, whatever without pain. And then the third is really like support. So supporting your organs, supporting your hips, like all of that. Those are the three like big functions of pelvic floor therapy. So all like those three things impact your whole day, like your whole life. Because if you can't jump on the trampoline with your kid without peeing your pants, like that's terrible. Like no one should have to go through that, or you shouldn't like have pain when you're putting in a tampon.

SPEAKER_01 7:51

Yeah. And tell me what did this kind of like mindset-wise, you're taking care of a baby now, but you're also trying trying to take care of yourself, excuse me. How was that stress? Like just not just navigating, choosing you, right? And doing something for yourself, but also you're taking care of another human being, right? Like you're experiencing, and this is your son, so your first baby, so you're just experiencing everything and so.

SPEAKER_00 8:13

I mean, I'm very fortunate that because I'm a therapist, I know that pelvic floor therapy existed. I think it's a little bit more like people know more about it now, but five and a half years ago, I feel like a lot of people did not know that it like what it was. Um, and I I did. And so after I had him and I was like, I'm having all these issues, like it I knew that it was something that could be done, but like the doctor didn't suggest it for me. Like that was that was all just me like making that decision for myself. So I did have to prioritize myself, which is hard to do when you're a new mom. At the time, it was like I had him during COVID, so everything was kind of shut down anyway. So I didn't have as many responsibilities, we weren't going places as much. It was kind of just the three of us for a really long time. We were in a little bubble, but that kind of did allow me to do more for myself, honestly, because we weren't doing anything else.

SPEAKER_01 9:03

Right. It created the space for you to it freed up time for you, which we were talking about is like sometimes a constraint, right? And getting things done. Um but that did. So if you didn't have that time, do you think that you would have you probably still would have done it right because there's an innate like calling here and to go deeper into it? Yeah. What are some other things besides having that free time? And again, wanting to take care of yourself. But was there anything like deeper there that you were noticing that, like, if I don't do this now, how can I continue? Like, I'm a new mom, right? And I want to be able to take care of my son, myself, and other people as you're trying to have a business here, right? Like, what were some things that you almost had to overcome with mindset or just like in a physical your stress levels, right? Did you switch up the weight you were sleeping or try to make your routine a little different? What were some things like that that you experienced?

SPEAKER_00 9:49

So just kind of trying to figure out like how you can add it into your day, not just like go. So I feel like going to the appointment is honestly the easiest part, but it's like the like the home exercise program of it all, like the carryover at home, like those are the things that are harder. Um, and this is something that I experience now, like as a practitioner doing this work. For me, I was like, okay, when can I add in like my exercises? Because it's not gonna be, I'm not gonna have a dedicated time. It has to be like when I'm standing at the sink brushing my teeth, or when I'm sitting in my car, like waiting for my groceries to be picked up. Like trying to think about like how I could make it part of my routine without making it more like something to add on. A habit stack. It has yeah, so it has to be a habit stack, uh-huh. Which is like what I very strongly like suggest to all my moms now. Like it has to be habit stacking. Like, I'm I do not like to give like exercises unless it could be done in a habit.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

Something like an addition to something so that it just makes it easier because you're already doing that thing. Yeah, it's almost like a check, like, okay, I did that. I do have a like time to do this right now, so I'm gonna take action on it.

SPEAKER_00 10:54

Yeah, I'm I'm standing here anyway. Yeah, but there's no way I'm gonna add it on to my day. Like I like mentally had to make the shift of like how can I use that? Like, how can I be doing something else and then add it in? Because it is important. And like, yes, I want to be the mom that can like run across the field with my son and like chase him and pick him up and like not have issues. So that is something that I very strongly like I'm an advocate for now with my patients. I'm like, you have to have it stack. Like, I don't want to add to your stress level. Um, also just like for me now, I am a mobile practice, wow, which means like moms can have their babies there.

unknown 11:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:28

So that takes away some of this pressure of like having to then bring like their baby, like find care for their baby or whatever. Like they're already in their home environment. Their baby's at home, they have their toys, they have their little like whatever they need, it's all there. Um, so helping to remove some of the barriers. Remove that friction, yeah, totally. And I know how hard it is. So I'm like, okay, how do I remove barriers so that they can get the care that they want and they need?

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Yeah, which is so uh again, it's just so amazing because you walk through the experience, you figured out what worked, what didn't work, and now you have this practice that you're able to help other women. And we are gonna dive so much more deeper into this. I'm like, I do want to like, this is so cool, all of this, because so many of our listeners and just you know, our following on social media here that we are trying to build a community with, need to see that we've been through this, right? Like these experiences are not, it's wonderful that someone can teach to it, but when someone has experienced it and now can help you try to like, you know, achieve whatever it is you're trying to achieve, that piece of it is so valuable and important. And I want to know more about what was kind of that relationship that was built there with her that you now kind of offer to your clients, right? Like, how did that relationship influence how you now help your clients?

SPEAKER_00 12:44

So, yeah, I've always been a therapist, I've been a therapist for a long time. So I have always like, I like to help people, I like to treat people, I want to see them get better, I want to see them achieve their goals. So, me then going through therapy myself, like achieving my goals, it just gave me the perspective of like I can also do this for others because it is important. And there's there's just not enough pelvic four therapists, like in general. Like, there's so many women in this world that they're dealing with it, and like there's not enough therapists. So we always need more. And women need have so many needs. I don't know. I just it I had a good relationship with my therapist, and I just felt like it was really impactful for me.

SPEAKER_01 13:23

Did you have to kind of like search, or did you how did you find her? Like, how did you know to go to her for like your therapist?

SPEAKER_00 13:30

Because I'm like that, kind of also stems where I want to come from with the basis of this question is trust because therapist, honestly, that was an insurance situation. So she they took insurance, and that's where um I delivered my son at USF. Um, that's where they recommended, and I got really lucky and she was awesome. And then my second pelvic floor therapist um is pelvic soul, um, and Jordan actually recommended her to me, like I don't know, this is like almost four years ago now. Um, and so I went with her recommendation and I it was it was awesome. So I've always had really good experiences. Um, but it you do need to find like the right fit for you because it again it is really vulnerable. So like you want someone who like listens to you and just like you feel safe in their presence. Yeah. So but absolutely yeah, I think the first time was I got lucky and the second time was a recommendation. Beautiful, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

Yeah, which is awesome that that recommendation was so great, you know. Yeah, of course it was, and this is where you have your connections and your people out there that are of course looking out for you, right? And again, where that is stemming from and that trust layer there is so much again back to the nervous system, right? And so you experienced all those symptoms, like you had a tear, which is traumatic. So now your nervous system needs to process that, but no one gave you the pause to process that necessarily. You just keep moving. Your mom now, like I have someone to take care of. Yeah, then you start add on the layer of like incontinence, right? And now that is just as a woman or any human being, it doesn't even have to be a woman, right? That's another layer of just like something that we have to hold really processing. Exactly, yeah. Terrible, no one wants that. Yeah, the wheels are turning and everything. So, where did you find that other areas you were noticing that it was affecting it? Like that stress of that, just dealing with that, right? The physical pain, you're like not able to hold your bladder and stuff. Did you see the stress manifesting in other areas? Like you were a little shorter when you answered someone, or you were noticing that you're a little irritable in the afternoon? Were there like the signs that you needed to take action besides just the physical?

SPEAKER_00 15:28

I would say like it made me say, like, not want to like work out. Like that, like it would just kind of make me shy away from like things that I wanted to do.

SPEAKER_01 15:36

Yeah. Yeah. With shying away from that and coming back into it then. How did you start to expand and evolve after you went through your sessions? Because you no longer go to pelvic floor therapy. Do you?

SPEAKER_00 15:47

No, I no, yeah. I did go after I had my daughter too, because I'm like, I'm still going. Like, I even I'm a pelvic floor therapist myself. Like I am still going after I had her like trouble double check everything for sure.

SPEAKER_01 15:59

Coaches need coaches, mentors need mentors, we all need support. We're all human. Yeah, totally. Yeah, absolutely. So there was time between your babies, though, right? And so, how was that? How long did you go? I guess first, how long did you get pelvic floor therapy from?

SPEAKER_00 16:15

From like October to January. So, like a a couple a good couple months. I went like weekly, I think for a little while, and then I went like bi-weekly, and then it like was monthly. Okay. And it kind of just like transitioned into like independence. And the second time around, it's different, but so the second time around, I actually went to pelvic floor therapy for fertility, which is an another like option. And so that's been like on, it was on and off for a few years. So it wouldn't be like all at once, it would be like I went for like six weeks at a time, and then might be like a month or another month. It kind of was like on and off depending on like what my body needed at the time. But that was an ongoing, like ongoing process, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:52

And so you would listen to your body, right? If it was on and off, and what would make you book the next, what would make you go back when you were kind of like no what were the things that you noticed?

SPEAKER_00 17:00

It kind of depends. I like honestly, like I went prior to like IVF. So my second, my daughter is through IVF. Um, so there was like a protocol, like you would like depending on like where you were in your IVF cycle, like you would go and it was like a certain amount of time and things like that. So, and then I also went during pregnancy, like preparing for birth, um, and as I was dealing with some like medical things and then postpartum as well. So, like that was all just like listening to my body, like what it needed. Yeah. 100%.

SPEAKER_01 17:25

Did you do anything besides pelvic floor therapy? Was there any like, did you do yoga or meditation, or were you like doing any self-care practices?

SPEAKER_00 17:33

I guess I should say that I'm like definitely a proponent for therapy in general. I've done therapy for a long time and I feel like it's super helpful. And I love yoga, and I think yoga, like a movement practice specifically, whatever it may be, is like incredibly important for like everyone. So that's really I mean, yes.

SPEAKER_01 17:51

Yeah, well, I'm like you're doing so good and you're here. That's why I am like you've had such a journey, right? Like it wasn't easy. And so, where are some of the stressors that you were you have a great husband and he was supporting you so much? Yeah, but he's one person too, right? Like you're a team, of course, but you still there's only so much you can hold on your plate before it's like it starts to overspill. What were some areas that you were just experiencing, whether that be in family life or whether it be in your work life, right? Like booking clients or getting clients. What were some like obstacles that you were seeing?

SPEAKER_00 18:22

I personally like shut down. So I'm like, okay, like, and I I know myself and I don't like to ask like for help, especially when I'm like not feeling my best. So not talking to my husband, not really not necessarily like reaching out. So, like things that I know, like when I start to like pull away, I'm like, okay, I need to like actually reach out. So, like finding like my friend groups and like because yeah, you know, my husband can take me so far. So, like, who's my community? How can they support me in all the different things? All the like the personal aspects of my life, professionally, how do we work together? Because women have to support each other. So, like, my women tribe is like very I've really cultivated that for like all aspects of my life to be able to like do all that I do now.

SPEAKER_01 19:06

I think something I loved hearing one time, and not therapy is so beautiful, and I'm not telling anyone to not go to therapy, but I read something one time that said, like, people that don't need therapy is because their sisters, like their circle is so tight. Like I don't know the exact verbium of what it was, but essentially it was because you have them. You have your circle to vent to. You might have this person that you can talk about this like side of things with, this person you can talk about this side of things with. And that is also why I love that why I created this podcast, right? It's for that community aspect. So, what was it like finding your tribe? Because were did they all come at once and it just kind of worked out that way? Or how was it kind of just like navigating that uncertainty in that time?

SPEAKER_00 19:46

It took a long time to find my tribe. Honestly, I don't think I really started finding people for a long time. I we moved and I was like, we're not gonna stay. So I'm not gonna bother. Like, why would I make you know long-term connections? Like, I'm just gonna like move back in a year or two, whatever. So I kind of resisted it. And then after I had my son, I was like, I really like need like a solid tribe. Like that's when I felt like it wasn't just enough to just be like working and like have my husband. Like, I needed like other people. I joined like mom groups like in the area, so community rich collective used to be around, it's not around anymore, sadly. But been like a slow build, and we do have a couple family members down here, but it it was like very purposeful. Like, I felt like I was like seeking out connections because as an adult, like you don't it's so much harder than when you're like in college, like you're not like just like hanging out, making friends, trying to find the similarities because in college you're all it's almost like we have to be here, right?

SPEAKER_01 20:40

Like we all chose to be here, but we're here.

SPEAKER_00 20:42

Like, yeah, you're all in the same, like you're all in the same phase of life. So you're all like in college. Um, versus here, I'm like, do they have like a kid? Like, what are they into? Like, are we gonna be on the same page? Can we hang out? And then it's all you know, then so it makes it easier when they have kids too. Of course. You have to because you don't have to, but it just does make it easier.

SPEAKER_01 21:03

Naturally, because you're doing things, like doing the things, you're just doing the similarity. Like you're already for sure. Yeah. So then you get to fill your cup while your kids get to fill their cup too, and it's like everyone gets to win here.

SPEAKER_00 21:14

Yeah. I feel like a huge nervous system are set as like hanging out with my friend, drinking coffee while our kids run around.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

I love this. I love that you also said that it took time because that is something else I think that a lot of people like we're we want to build community so fast and so like, you know, we want to smack it. Yeah, but I think we sometimes miss that genuineness, right? Like it doesn't have to be all rushed in and flooded in at one time, right? Like we could have a conversation here and I might talk to you again in a month, but now I might talk to you more often. Now I might talk to you next week, right? Now I'm gonna talk to you every other day. It's one of those things where it's slow and study. Um, and the fact that you just honored yourself and you were like, I am gonna stay here and I need that. You realize like I need to fill my cup in this way. There's not anything else that is going to fill it. That way, right? What were some of those things that you were feeling? Because this is something we don't really talk about a lot, right? But that's a very lonely like feeling almost when you're like, I need my tribe, I need my community, I need my people. Yeah. What were you like? What was a day-to-day like? What were kind of like thoughts that were springing? What was there's no right or wrong again, you know? It's just like I'm I'll share some of my two, right?

SPEAKER_00 22:22

Like it's just real and where we're at. I mean, for sure, like loneliness, yeah. Because I I mean, I'm the person that I've had the same like best friends since I was like a child. Yeah. Like literally, like five and ten years old. Like, I make a friend and like they're my friend, like for like life. So I felt like I was lonely to the point where I needed other like people that I was like actively letting in. That's kind of scary because it's kind of vulnerable to like make that dive. And I do feel like in order to make a genuine connection with someone, you really do have to like go deep. Like you have to like put yourself out there because if you're just talking about the weather and like what the kids, like the surface things, like you're not gonna make like real friends. Yeah. So it's kind of scary. Yeah. Very vulnerable and like almost like not embarrassing, but almost embarrassing, where you're like, are they gonna like judge me for like telling them like this? Like, are you know, you like say something and like an hour later you're like like regretting every single thing you just said to like that? That made me sound like so weird. Like all I wanted was a friend.

SPEAKER_01 23:22

Yeah, yeah. But that's when you see the genuineness though, right? And the ones that are there, because you could go off on a rant and a rattle, and it's they don't even care. It's just like, okay, whatever, you know, we're gonna keep on keeping on and keep doing our thing. So getting a little bit into more of what you do now, yeah. I want to talk about what your day-to-day is like right now. I know you're mobile, right? What is your weekly kind of week like? What is the week like for you?

SPEAKER_00 23:47

I mean, it it fluctuates a lot, honestly. Okay, and like I still I do work part-time at the hospital. Um, I do like that because A, I get to see like coworkers. And then I also, you know, like I get to keep like like acute care therapy skills, um, which I do feel like is important. Like I like to have that. And then I also have my practice, and then I also have two kids. So it's just a lot and it always it shifts. So what I currently do is depending on the week, like I just I do all my booking personally. So if you reach out to me, like you're not scheduling online with like time slots. Like I'm I'm scheduling you personally because then it gives me a lot more flexibility. Um, and also when I have to drive between houses, I have to calculate like how long I need. So if I have something that's a little bit farther away, I need a longer break in between. And then also I have a baby and I'm pumping, so I need to be able to like do all those things in between. So, like my schedule really it varies. It makes me have a lot more like autonomy over my day, yeah. Which was another like reason I really wanted to own my own business because I want to just be able to be in control of like all the different variables. Yeah, makes it a lot easier to be like, oh, like he has a field trip that day. Okay, let me just not schedule any patients so that I can go and like do that and like show up for my family the way I want to.

SPEAKER_01 25:03

It's so real because it's back to the point again of just honoring yourself, honoring your body, honoring your stress levels, right? Like this is what works for you. Because that was what I was about to ask you, but you just basically answered it. You this is the schedule that you have found that you feel the most free. Like be to be able to have a little bit of both. You still love the hospital, like working in that. So I love it, I love having coworkers.

SPEAKER_00 25:26

Yeah, that's I was it's like really nice to have co-workers. It is.

SPEAKER_01 25:29

I do, I completely know what you're saying because I'm like, I do a little bit too here and there throughout the week because same. And it's to have that community aspect of it where there's like other people that are in my position, right? That I do just get to see, and we are taking it's we're taking care of people together almost, right? Like we're all helping someone. But yeah, I get I absolutely love that you love that. Did you have to give anything up? That's my first question. Did you have to give anything up to be able to have the schedule?

SPEAKER_00 25:55

So when she was like three months old, I started taking clients again, like very minimally, like one or two a week, because my husband would just like go into work late. He can like he can move his schedule around a little bit. So he would stay with her. And then in January, I was like, Well, if I want to like be able to have the flexibility to schedule people and like I I do need like care. So I did have to give that up. And I loved being home when she was a baby, like little, little baby. But that was a big adjustment for me because I always fluctuate between, well, if I just worked at the hospital and I didn't own a business, I would have more time for like the baby, and I thought like I would have more time like with my kids. So it like ma a little bit of mom guilt and mom shame. But at the same time, like my dreams and goals professionally are important, and I want to be able to show my kids that. And I'm not like working 60 hours a week, like, let's be honest, like it's very manageable. Yeah, um, finding the balance was hard, but it's great because you know what? If I have a busy week, I can just not schedule another person. If somebody reaches out, I'd be like, Oh, I'll schedule you in two weeks. Like, I I don't have to say yes. When you have the capacity, yeah. The capacity is very important to me. Like, what was my capacity for that week? Some weeks I have higher capacity and some weeks I have less. Yeah. I felt the I felt the difference. Like when I started doing both. Before I had her, not as hard, right? Like I was like, okay, like this is fine. Now I'm like, uh it's just it's everything is harder. Everything's more exhausting. Yeah, like I have to really, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

But I have to really, yeah. That's where it's like, that's where you know it's so real though, also when you're passionate about this and it is what you love to do and want to do, because it's almost like you're at a point where the alternative, it's okay. But now that you know that you are capable, yeah, you are honoring yourself and loving yourself enough to go after those things, even if some days it is a little or some weeks are it's a little harder, right? Which is natural and you've understood that ebb and flow. You had to go to a location for your therapy sessions, right? For your pelvis. Right. So even that is something that you saw, not that it was a bad thing, that was that business practice, but in your own practice, those are even things that like you could kind of not compare, right? But just things that you liked and didn't like about it. Things that are more convenient or make it a little more feasible for someone to be able to get the care that they need, right?

SPEAKER_00 28:16

And I love mobile therapy for especially like like postpartum and all of that because it just people feel more comfortable in their homes. Their baby could be there, their toddler could be there. Like I've had a patient not that long ago who had like a two and a three-year-old. And it it I'm not saying it's not challenging to also then get your session in because it is, but like it's real. And like, so I want to meet you like where you are and like also where you feel more like most comfortable. And like, would I love to maybe one day have a clinic like one day a week or two days a week? Yes. But I would always still offer mobile because I do feel like there's a huge benefit to it. Yeah, it's just like so much more relaxed for like your client, and we want them to feel safe and comfortable. Yeah. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:57

It is, it's it's meeting them. That was the key that you said is meeting them where they're at. Right where they are. That is what is so also needed. Like, we need more pelvic floor therapists, right? But even more so meeting someone where they're at and honoring that this is their journey too, right? Like what do they need? Yes, like what is it? And you're so in tune with that because you yourself were figuring out what your needs were and you were honoring those. And again, even if it wasn't the easiest decision, because like you said, mom guilt, right? And there's sometimes that's natural just if you're a human, of course. Yes, but I think showing up, and that is something that is so just you as a woman, you know, you as a business owner is so valuable because we need more leaders that can show up for themselves and show up for the communities we serve. And it was meeting yourself where you were at first and doing those stuff. And now in turn, you're able to meet someone else where they are, and like you said, that creates the safety for the change to happen. It's allowing that space to bloom, right? Like it's allowing that seed to just have time. What you know, you change soils, you change different water, the sunlight, what it needs. It's so adaptive. And I love that you, it's real life. That is the realest thing that I I love that you said this because this is something that I tell my clients all the time, you know, they'll be like, well, does it have to be this, this, and this? And it's not A, B, C, D. It's not cookie, cut or cut and paste. Like, we I want to know about your lifestyle. Cause sometimes they're, I think they're a little, oh, well, I can still do this, right? And that's not the point, is we'll get there, but in time, because if I make you bite off all of the things before I just like habit stack or something like you said, where I just meet you where you're at and make it a little bit easier for you to take a step forward versus fighting the wind, right? You're running through quick sales too. There's water, there's a million things coming at you that, like, okay, breath and I'm here with you. We can do this.

SPEAKER_00 30:51

What are you doing now that is helping? I always tell my patients, um, like, I'm not gonna like lead them. Like, I want to like walk alongside them in their journey because I feel like that is like again, creating safety. Um, so you're not like leading them, you're not pulling them along, like you are just like you're meeting them where they are, yeah, and you're walking together. It's one foot in front of the other.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

Yeah. I always do, I'm like you see me here. I'm always doing the hand holding. Yes. Because for one, what I tell them too is like, we're in the session, my sessions are 60 minutes, right? But I'm not with you for the rest of the day. You know, if we meet once a week, I'm not gonna meet with you until next week. That doesn't mean that we are not interacting. Of course we are, but I'm not standing right beside you every single second, right? So the way that I am walking with you is by meeting you where you're at. That's where they're a little like, wait, I can, but you are doing this yourself, you know. I am the guide and I am helping yes, I'm a guide, and I'm helping you get their walk beside you, but you are taking the initiative and the steps. I love it. It's so um beautiful when someone does say like thank you or whatever, but I always just stop and I'm like, it's you though. You didn't like you're making the change. Your body is doing the change.

SPEAKER_00 31:54

Like I'm I'm helping facilitate, but I'm not doing anything else.

SPEAKER_01 31:57

Yes, exactly. And it's we I've just have loved my experience too. And I know you have you see so many different aspects of life. Like you ever there, you have moms. Moms are never, they're not the same. There's no one mama that is the same as the next mama, right? They're so different, and which means their experiences are so different. And so to be able to meet someone where they're at is foundational for that safety and to let them open up. And why I'm bringing all this up is like to have that manual touch, right? And building that trust with someone, giving them that space to feel safe. Like, I'm gonna meet you where you're at. Like 100%, you know. Some of my sessions, I definitely in the first, you know, until we get that level of trust and confidence, I tap right for a stimulation, just neural stimulation, right? And before I do it though, I always ask because that is they'll be like, it's fine, right? And they'll say after the first one, they're like, you can just do it, but I don't. And I keep asking, they'll be like, you don't have to, but the moment I've and this is where I learned experience, right? And now I don't do this, is because the moment someone did tell me, but then I went to go to a different area, right? Now they're guarded. Now they have like refused and now I've rescinded where I was just bringing you to. And so, like, until we get to that place, this is trust, right? Like this big time, yeah. And there's nothing wrong with that too, because then I feel like that's where I also see shame start to come up, right? Because now they feel like I'm judging them because they're that way when I'm I'm the coach. Like, you know, I'm here to help you. This is the whole reason I'm here is to help you work through this. I'm not judging you at all. This is a beautiful place to be in, right? Because you are gonna feel whatever you're feeling and you are gonna make those connections in your body and you are gonna be able to move forward from it. So it's very much, you know, your pelvic floor therapy, you're helping them get back into connection, you know. You're helping them read Yoni, is what I call her, right? But like you're helping her just feel like you're connected to her again. Birth is so traumatized. It's beautiful, but it's so traumatizing. You know, it doesn't have to be either. I don't want to put it that way.

SPEAKER_00 33:54

Anytime you're working in pelvic floor therapy, you you always have to like think that you're you have to assume that you're coming from a trauma-informed like perspective because you don't know what that person's gone through.

SPEAKER_01 34:04

Not at all. And also sometimes those people don't even know because they've shut it some down somewhere. You know, like there's so deep of this that it could go. Yeah, that again, you're meeting where they're at. It doesn't even have to go that deep if you don't want it to, right? Like you're just giving them the space to make that connection however they need to. And again, I'm just touching on this because we need more of this, right? Like we and we need more conversations about getting connected to ourselves because that is a scary place sometimes. Sometimes people don't want to do these things because they don't know what to expect or experience, right? Or maybe that's not for me. I'm not right, you know, and I want these conversations to let women know that like we are allowed to feel what we're feeling, right? There's no right or wrong, and we can make it through to the other side, right? And so, like you have your own business now, and this is why I'm touching on it because now you can help other women get through this. You experienced it yourself, you know. You were talking about before why some woman would come is because of the touch, like you can't be at home, and you know, all those things.

SPEAKER_00 35:03

But I can come here and now, but yeah, as like you just it's like a different, yeah, you know, it's just different. It's separated from you. Yeah, um, and I do feel like as a provider, we are like very responsible for paying attention to how our patient or client is like showing up on the table. So, like being aware that again, you're you're doing like just the I what they're there for is usually such like like people don't want to talk about it, right? Yeah, they don't want to talk about pain. It's uncomfortable for them, but they're like they could have like a history of sexual trauma, whatever it is. Yeah, um, but like you have to be very aware of like how their body's responding because you don't ever know. Like it's just the act of them putting your hands on their body, they might tense up. Yeah, like they might start to freak out, and now you're not gonna get as far as you could. So it's your responsibility as a provider to like very much like be paying attention, yeah. Um, to see how they're responding and how their nervous system is like responding to your prior, like to your care.

SPEAKER_01 35:56

Of course. And you know this tried and true, right? The reason we kind of have those issues that come in the first place is that just the it becomes disconnected because we weren't connected almost in the first place, right? And so it's it's re-establishing connection that we had from like coming out ourselves, right? Like you know, from a baby, but now we're relearning it. That also takes time, that takes patience, it takes courage too to be able to do that because it is scary. And so, like it is care, you know, in your own feet, in your own journey, not to anyone else, but it's like you finding that place where you are able to work through that. Um, is just it you come to the other side and it's such a good place to be in. Yeah. Absolutely. So, kind of what do you see now with your mamas when they're coming in? Do you see some similarities and some differences with how their nervous system presents when you're like going to that? Is there anything that you notice?

SPEAKER_00 36:45

I mean, I just have to tailor myself. So there's some so I know a lot of people think that pelvic core therapy is like you always do internal work, but that's not the case. Like it really depends how that person presents. I have some people that I will never do internal work with because they don't feel safe with it. Um, and some people don't mind at all. It really just depends on like what they have specifically gone through, why they're coming to see me. Um, and so but I do feel like across the board, at least with a lot of my postpartum mamas, um, they definitely need to work on like re-establishing and just the connection with their body again because everything has been stretched out for so long. Like they've given birth to human. They are a whole another person like after having a baby. Like you change, like you just change. Like you're not you are still you, but you've also like now gone through this like huge event. Yeah. Um so I do feel like you do have to at least establish like a reconnection with like themselves. Yeah. Um, that's a big part of what I work on.

SPEAKER_01 37:43

Yeah. Which is huge. And so it's so powerful what you're doing, and we do. I keep saying it, but we need more of it because as you have also learned to connect with yourself, this is a deeper layer of showing another woman how to connect with her own body, you know. That's where it's come like the sisterhood and stuff, you know. Like, yeah, because you can't do it, but you know that you know the adventure. No, you can do it. Like, exactly. But it is, it is hard.

SPEAKER_00 38:07

Like it's definitely challenging. But I feel like honestly, like nervous system regulation, like breath work and like just like connecting all the pieces, that's like the cornerstone of like pelvic floor therapy. Before even like, before even like working on like pain or anything like that, like it's like nervous system, connection, breath, like all those things are like your like foundation. Yeah, you really have to like that is has to be looked at for sure.

SPEAKER_01 38:29

It's like the it's a core of it, right? Like it's just like the basics. It's like the foundation. And how you said a lot, yeah, like you're working with the hips too. This is all connected to the bigger. Low back, hips, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:37

All of it's connected together.

SPEAKER_01 38:38

Yeah, I see it a lot show up in the hips, right? So when I'm doing like assessments and stuff, girl, so much in their heads, so much tension, and it's like that's when I start to see where it's disconnect or connect, right? Because now as I walk them through those movements and now I'm focusing on breath, I can see where it's coming deep, you know, or that deeper, because now I break it down into rib, cage, and pelvis, right? Like I'm kind of seeing the differences here. Are you decorating breathing?

SPEAKER_00 39:08

Like everything should be moving out and in and like going up and down together. Yeah. Um, but like women, we hold so much, we hold so much in our bodies. Like, yeah, tight. Like experiences that you go through where they're imprinted on your nervous system and imprinted in your body. And then when you go through something that might, it might not be the same event, but like, for example, like you sit on a table at a doctor's office and your body remembers that you had a bad experience there. Maybe you had pain when they were doing like some sort of examination or whatever, like your body remembers that pain. So now it's gonna respond. Um, even though you're not in, like you're not going in that situation everywhere. Like it's happening again, like your body remembers. Um, so you do people hold a lot of like tension in their pelvis and their shoulders. The shoal, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:55

I hold so much in my shoulders, like I'm like, oh, I know. I know. Sometimes I'm like, okay, drop them. I had one time I was having conversation. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:04

And it's like you have to like manually remember.

SPEAKER_01 40:06

You're talking about it another time, and she said something about posture, and I was just like, oh my gosh, mine is actually terrible right now. Oh, it's terrible. I know.

SPEAKER_00 40:13

I'm like, if I'm sitting at the desk, I'll realize, like, oh my god, my shoulders are literally up in my ears right now. You can see the difference, and like people walk around like that. They're just like up. And I'm like, you need to just drop it down.

SPEAKER_01 40:23

Yep, uh-huh. Bring it back. Bring it down. Yep. Let's come down to our toes here. Bring it back in. Yeah. Stuck there. It is. It absolutely is. And so you probably do a little bit of something, something before or after a shift. How would you say you prepare yourself? Because you come in regulated to your sessions, right? Like, of course, you have, yeah. Like you have to find where whatever it is you need to fill your toolkit, right? Before or after, whatever that is, what do you use to fill your toolkit? You know, what do you use that helps you?

SPEAKER_00 40:53

I mean, for me, like I like to always get to somebody's house early so I can just sit in the car for like five minutes before I then go inside and like just like breathe. Like, okay, like let me just like sit and breathe. Because I do, I want to make sure that I'm showing up and like giving you my full attention. Yeah. Um, and like giving you like I need to be regulated in order for you to then be regulated, which is so challenging when you're dealing with your children. Yeah. Same concept, a little bit easier when you're dealing with another adult. Um, but you need to be regulated yourself in order to then like create safety for them. So I like to show up early, sit in my car, and honestly, just like take deep, some deep breaths um to calm myself before I go in. But like outside of that, I really just like to be outside. That's perfect.

SPEAKER_01 41:34

Nature is the greatest gift. Absolutely. Grounds, put your feet in the grass, like touch, like touch grass. Go outside too. This is I grew up in upstate New York, so very much like woods, country, not the city at all. And that's what we did. We played outside all day long, right? I miss those aspects. I, you know, in my earlier 20s, I kind of fell away from that a little bit and I came back to it. And I'm 32 now, but I came back to it in my later 20s. Um, it's it's just a as powerful practice. I'm like, there you don't have to do yoga and you don't have to sit down with things. You know what I'm saying? Doing meditation. Like they are all aspects of it, they all work in their own way. And so, do you like to go like to a certain spot? Do you have a certain spot or just at home? Do you like to go outside at home?

SPEAKER_00 42:12

I mean, I just like to sit in my backyard. Yeah. Honestly. Yeah. Like I have some really pretty flowers that are blooming right now. So, you know, just like, I mean, it's accessible and it's there. So yeah. If I was like think like back to like when I was doing a lot of therapy, it was always like like visualizing like your safe space. So if I'm like visualizing that, that's like the woods.

SPEAKER_01 42:29

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:30

There's not a lot of woods in Tampa. I know.

SPEAKER_01 42:32

Oh, I know. It's so different. It's so different. Did you also grow up kind of with that? Very, very rural. Yeah. Okay. Very rural. Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. Totally. A lot of outside. But you know what right there, I think about things I did as a kid. I'm like, we just knew then, right? I didn't think about it. Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:48

But like you think about it, like, I don't know. Every time you're like, as I was growing up, if we were crazy, my mom would say, go outside. And like now, like my son is going crazy. I'm like, you gotta go outside. You gotta do it. Because outdoor, like outside, like regulates you. It does. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:02

You have birds chirping, it's always a sign of safety, right?

SPEAKER_00 43:06

Calm your body down. Like fussy babies, take them outside.

SPEAKER_01 43:09

Yes. Like, absolutely. Let them just get that air. And they really, I've seen babies even like respond to these like you notice. Like human are literally just like, ah, okay. It's like they almost can feel the energy that's inside from electricity, all the other things, right? You know, we take them outside, and it's just like they calm down.

SPEAKER_00 43:26

So it's like we do too. Uh-huh. And like I feel like in our like as you like become an adult, you go to work, you do all these things, you're always in constantly.

SPEAKER_01 43:34

Yes. Outside. Inside, constantly trying to do something beyond something buzzed. I like, you know, because the lights, electricity, like it's always stimulated.

SPEAKER_00 43:45

And it's like you need to just like remove yourself. Yes. Like literally calm your whole body down. You feel so much better.

SPEAKER_01 43:50

Power of a pause that feels better. Yeah. Everyone does that. Everyone feels better. Everyone, which is why I know you like this is how why you sit in the car for five minutes beforehand. Because you know that that whole experience, just by you showing up, nothing could go right. And that I'm not saying it would be like that at all, but like everything that you didn't want to happen could happen. But if you show up, even that prep, staying faithful to it, right? Like being there before that session, you have already put yourself in a place to win. No matter what happens. I think that's well, I like to touch on capacity, right? And like you have built yourself, you have expanded your capacity to be able to hold things just even with that toolkit. Like just with that one thing in your toolkit to do, it doesn't have to be a million things, right? It's what works for you. Yeah. It what brings you to your center, right? And it is what helps you to be able to help other women. So yeah, I love this so much. This has been such a such a wonderful conversation. Is there anything else that you would like to touch on? I'm like, we could keep going if you want to. I'm like, we can keep touching on stuff.

SPEAKER_00 44:51

I mean, I just like to tell people, I'm like, just because like common doesn't mean normal. So like women go through all these things, whether I mean again, we talked a lot about postpartum, but it's not, it's women across the like lifespan. So I treat women across the whole lifespan. I want to empower you. Um, and like you might be experiencing like leaking, pain, whatever at any point in your life. And just because it's common doesn't mean it's normal.

SPEAKER_01 45:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

Um, and I feel like people just think like, oh, I had a baby, I'm gonna like pee my pants forever. Like, no, no, no, that does not, you know that's not like doesn't have to be the way it is.

SPEAKER_01 45:27

Yeah. Um, no, that's a great thing. That's a great thing for listeners to hear because we want to be so the same. This is where social media has become, you know, what it is sometimes. And I think we're starting to steer away from that. And this is where leaders we can like start to steer that ship and just be more authentic. But having something in common with someone does not necessarily mean that that's what's meant for your body, is basically the point. And that's where it's so cool finding your community and all of this, right? Because you find the people that are like you and are not like you. But my point is common is not it's not normal. It's not normal for that to yes, exactly. It's not normal. Um, and we see this so much in our healthcare field, right? Where people are told one thing and okay, you're gonna get time. That's for time, right? That's where we come back to time. Yeah. And it's fine. It's taking those actions, it's taking those steps to figure out what's going on with your body, right? Just getting to kind of that base layer of why is it doing what it's doing right? Yeah. And now how do I take care of it? And so that's where what that comes down to is they start to realize it's their pelvic floor, right? There's some things going on there, there's some weaknesses. We're just like holding tension. We've got trauma down there. Now, okay, what do I need to do for my body, right? That's where this is not, I don't want to be doing this just because people have this happen after birth does not mean that it needs to continue happening after birth, right? Like I can go back to my life.

SPEAKER_00 46:52

And you could be like five years postpartum. Like, you don't just because you didn't do it right away, doesn't mean you can't. Like you can like still enact change. Like anytime, yes. That's another one. And people are like, oh, but I had babies like 15 years ago. Like you can still enact change in your body. It's still a muscle, yeah. Yes, like there's 14 muscles in your pelvic floor, like there's and they're doing so much work. So like you think about it, like your bicep, right? Like your biceps able to like close and open, like it's taking load, like that's a muscle. Yes. Um, so your pelvic floor is the same. Like it has 14 muscles, right? Like it's a lot of it needs like help sometimes, and that's okay. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 47:26

So yeah, so it just needs support, it just needs training, like anything else.

SPEAKER_00 47:31

Yeah, you know, it's a I mean, it's the center of your body. Like it is such a like, yeah, I mean, a power, like it's a power, piece of power in your body. Yeah, like that's where you like you do like you grow babies, and like it's just it's your center. It's your center.

SPEAKER_01 47:44

Yeah, so it really like it needs love. Yes, it does. Absolutely. It does. That was a great thing that I love that you just added that because it does need love and it needs love for you and what your body needs. Because again, back to the point, like you are not the same, but we can be a little similar, right? But we're not innately the same down to that Yoni down in here. And so, what does she need for you? And uh, it's just so amazing what you're doing. It's so amazing that you're helping these women out in the community. It's a lot of fun, honestly. I know, I know it is. I'm like, I just see you, and I love I loved everything you share today, but I can tell that you connect with your patients. You really try to get to like you you try to get them where they want to be. I mean, I you do get them where they want to be. Not trying to do get them where they want to be.

SPEAKER_00 48:30

Yeah, I want to help people. Yeah. Again, like I've been a therapist for so long. Like, I like that's what I want to do, and I'd love to see change.

SPEAKER_01 48:37

So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

Um, yeah. Beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing all of this. Where can our listeners find you? You can find me on my website, which is wholepublic wellness.com. You can find me on Instagram, which is also whole pelvic wellness, and then Facebook is also whole, they're all the same. Just whole public wellness. They're all just like very super simple.