BOOST Your Comeback By Reading These 6 Books | Part II | 21.2

Want to stop overthinking, reduce your stress, and finally understand how to show up as a high-value man in relationships?

In this episode, I review 3 more badass books that will level up your mindset and your life after a breakup or divorce:

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson – How to stop caring about the wrong things and focus on what actually matters

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle – How to get out of your head, stop ruminating about the past, and live with less stress and anxiety

How to Be a 3% Man by Corey Wayne – The principles of masculine leadership, attraction, and understanding relationship dynamics with women

These three books together will help you build real confidence, dramatically lower your stress levels, and give you a much clearer understanding of how to navigate relationships without losing yourself.

If you’re tired of overthinking, people-pleasing, or feeling anxious about the future, these books deliver practical wisdom that can accelerate your comeback.

Stop settling for average.

Start becoming the man who thinks, acts, and leads differently.

Let’s keep rebuilding. 

#BookRecommendations #SubtleArtOfNotGivingAFuck #PowerOfNow #HowToBeA3PercentMan #MensMentalHealth #BreakupRecovery #MasculineGrowth #HighValueMan #PodcastForMen #BadassComeback

Hosted by Chris Ryan - Professional Life Coach | B.A. Psychology

Breakup and divorce recovery coaching for men

For coaching inquiries and general questions, email: coachchrisryan@gmail.com

*The BCP is 100% self-funded and does not run ads.

Keywords: breakup recovery for men, divorce recovery for men, rebuilding identity after breakup, masculine qualities after divorce, feeling incomplete after breakup, reclaiming masculinity post-breakup, life after divorce for men, men's self-improvement after breakup, healing from heartbreak men, post-breakup identity crisis men, divorced men recovery, broken up men healing, men's mental health after relationship ends.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Let's go. Welcome back, guys. Today is part two of our badass book series. We are covering three more that are guaranteed to boost you along your journey. Last week's books were about self-discipline, responsibility, and tuning up how you show up in your relationships. Two of today's books are going to be more about letting go of things that do not serve you. And we're going to top it off with perhaps the most underrated book as far as understanding women and how you can attract the perfect one for you. So let's dive right in. Book number four, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson. I've read this book three times, guys. And you know what? There's tons of information out there on what things you can add to your life to make it better, but rarely do you hear about things that you have to get rid of in order to create more room for those new things to thrive. The subtle art is going to make you look at your life in terms of what you put your energy towards, or rather, what you give an F about. The truth is, just as there are only so many hours in a day, there is only so much energy you can give. If you are giving your energy to non-important things, you won't have enough energy to give to things you should give an F about. One of my buddies growing up had parents that were a classic example of this. They both worked too much, and instead of taking care of him beyond the bare essentials, they spent their free time glued to the TV and getting all worked up about politics. He would ask his mom to take him to the store with her or to even help her with chores, but she always said, No, son, mommy is too tired and stressed out. He would ask his dad to play with him, but his dad also gave him some type of excuse as to why he, quote, couldn't. My buddy watched his parents just go on and on about the president, the governor, and tons of other things that they couldn't control. As a result, he was always on his bike riding around, asking any one of us if he could hang out and play simply because he didn't want to be home. He didn't feel loved. And when he left for college, his parents actually started getting mad at him because he wasn't calling them as much as they would have liked. It took them basically his entire college career to realize that they had wasted so much time doing anything but enjoying their time with him while he was young. The main takeaway from the subtle art that we can apply to us is that you have to stop putting your energy into things that aren't moving you forward in your badass journey. The less energy we waste, the more we have to spend. But it's more of an investment, if you really think about it. So that's even a bigger reason to protect it. Here are some common energy wasters you can severely reduce or get rid of today. Ready? Social media, doom scrolling, TV shows, junk food, adult content on the internet, political stuff that is anything but cold, hard, factual, unbiased news. That's hard to find these days, I know. But this concept also goes beyond things. Let's go deeper. Toxic people, especially toxic women you might be talking to, bad friends, people who are energy vampires, people who take without giving anything in return, people who don't take accountability for themselves, people who complain, are negative, entitled, lazy, etc. And how about this one? People who have walked out of your life. Ringing any bells. Guys, there really is no limit to how much you can cut out of your life, or at least significantly reduce to save your energy for the things that matter. And this book will help you find what those things are. As your life changes, you will find more opportunities to shed unnecessary things. I read this book five years ago, and to this day, I still find energy wasters I can get rid of. And I have to say, as someone who struggled through anger management, reading this book unlocked a new level of calm for me. I was 100% putting my precious energy into things that pissed me off. But once I started detaching from those things and people, I found that I was just more relaxed and happy with life in general. My anxiety and depression levels have dropped significantly as well. So I owe Mark Manson a massive thank you if I ever get the chance to meet him. The subtle art of not giving a fuck. Get ready to feel lighter and happier with your life in general. Alright, book number five: The Power of Now by Eckhart Tole. Just listening to this book will help you become more present to the moment. Eckhart Tole's voice alone will put you in that nice initial stage of meditation, regardless if you're reading or listening to this in bed or at work. He was a guy who battled crippling anxiety and depression until he discovered the power of being in the present moment. He's able to word things in such a way that helps non-meditators like me understand what it means to be present and out of your head. And I did have some preconceived notions going into this when I started reading it. I thought it was just another book on how to meditate properly. And I'm super high strung. So no, I do not like meditating, even though I know it would probably do me a lot of good. But when I started reading this, something interesting happened. I realized that you can access a level of peace and centeredness without carving out time to sit and do nothing. And no, you don't have to drive to the countryside to see beautiful things. And this isn't just about observing Mother Nature and stuff like that. You could admire the architecture of tall buildings in a city. You can feel joy when you see another human being. You can be thankful that you are alive and you can give positive energy freely without asking for anything in return. Ekhartole is not really the most in-shape guy you will meet, but he is damn successful and a total modern day enlightened spiritual master. And in my book, that makes him a badass. Guys, this book will be super beneficial to you in every stage of your badass comeback. Not only will it help you reduce some of that anxiety and depression that you might be feeling right now, it will help keep you sane when you are further along and going through badass challenges in your future. Because honestly, pulling out of post-breakup slump is an awesome feeling, and you can fill your life with new challenges, goals, and action steps. But if you want to stay charged up and fresh, you have to zoom out and slow down every once in a while. Like I said, you don't have to go into a special quiet room and sit cross-legged to do it. You can do it for short increments throughout your day. At work, I do it whenever I'm walking to and from my car, just enjoying the environment around me and being thankful for two legs and plenty of oxygen to fill my lungs. I also do it in the car. And I still pay attention to the road, but I let the soothing sounds of the engine and the road be a nice frequency to relax into, if that makes sense. And it actually makes me a more alert driver, which is obviously a good thing. I also do it when I take a shower, feeling the cool water against my skin, etc. You can tap into this sort of piece wherever you go and whenever you want. And that's the coolest part of this, is that you can make it your own. And of course, the more you practice it, the more it will just become part of how you operate. You can expect a clearer mind, more accurate decisions, and less worrying about things you can't control. And those are badass qualities right there. All right, finally, book number six, How to Be a Three Percent Man by Corey Wayne. I have mentioned this book a few times already in this podcast, and I do so because I think every man should read it. This book is basically my Bible to understanding women and the masculine role in relationships. Now, I don't completely agree with everything Coach Corey writes, but 99% for me is good enough. If you really want to learn how to decipher feminine language and put yourself a cut above 97% of guys out there, read this book as many times as you can. And no, 3% man doesn't mean being 97% feminine. It's the percentage of guys who truly understand women. And yes, it really is only 3%. And you're going to realize this. And it's getting smaller with each passing day. If you have ever been confused as to why she says one thing and does another, why she starts arguments out of nowhere, why she's bitchy at times, why she doesn't want sex, all the common complaints that you hear from guys as far as trying to figure these things out, this book clears all of that up. Fair warning though, once you crack it open, you're most likely gonna have some head slap moments of, oh shit, I do that. No wonder she was reacting that way. I had those moments when I read this plenty of times. I realized how many blind spots I had in my prior relationships. There were so many things I was either doing wrong or not doing at all. And there were good things I was doing, but I had no idea I was doing them. Before I read this book, I wasn't getting as many dates as I wanted. I would spend way too much time trying to get to know her through text instead of going for the date and getting to know her in person. She would then get bored and ghost me. If I did get her on a date, I'd wound up doing most of the talking and then she would eventually get bored and then ghost me. And if I did get a girlfriend, I would stop going to the gym and doing all my masculine things that made her attracted to me in the first place. And guess what? She would get bored and then leave. And this whole time I was thinking, what the hell is wrong with these women? I'm doing what every other guy does and I'm not getting the results I want. And of course, that was the problem all along. There are a lot of things us guys do to quote, get her to like us more, but you're gonna realize that 90% of those things have the opposite effect. There are things in this book that are gonna sound counterintuitive, but they will start to make sense as you progress through the chapters. What you think will attract her to you may not be what she is actually attracted to, and 3% man clears that up. But there is another element that surprised me. In order to successfully attract your ideal woman, you don't have to learn pickup techniques or go out and meet a bunch of women to get rid of approach anxiety. And don't get me wrong, you can totally do that and you can have massive success if you go down that road. But I think what you should do first is what this book suggests, and that is tap into your masculinity further and ground yourself in who you are before you go out to meet new women. This book will help you do that and fast. It took me reading through it four times to finally realize, oh shit, I do have these qualities inside. I just didn't know how to bring them out. And now I'm learning about it. This book also outlines the importance of that list that I've mentioned. This is a list of qualities you want in your ideal woman and a list of qualities that you absolutely will never tolerate. Once I made that list, I found my wife the very next week. So, guys, crack this book open and read it as many times as you can. Corey Wayne suggests reading it 10 to 15 times, and I'm in the middle of read number 12. When I first started, I listened to it seven times in two months a while back, and I still come back to it every few months to get refreshed. Nothing in this book has steered me wrong. In fact, it helped me steer away from women who were not good for me and helped me get over a couple of my toxic exes. Nowadays, I can look at a dysfunctional relationship and pinpoint where the guy and girl are going wrong. My friends come to me for relationship advice, and when they apply it, they always get good results. I've even talked to women who are dissatisfied in their relationships and help them figure out what they are actually upset over. Most of the time, it's not the things that she says she's upset about. It all comes down to how her man is showing up in their relationship, unless she is really screwing up in some way. Confusing? Yes. Unless, of course, you read this book. You're gonna realize that feminine nature makes a lot of sense and you won't ever be confused again. And that about wraps it up, guys. Each one of these books has a place in your badass comeback. You should also expect more confidence, peace, and clarity in general. Once again, they are The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson, The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, and How to Be a Three Percent Man by Corey Wayne. Leaving you guys with a quote from Eckhart Tolle. Quote If your mind carries a heavy burden of past, you will experience more of the same. The past perpetuates itself through lack of presence. The quality of your consciousness at this moment is what shapes the future. See you guys next week. Thank you for joining me in another badass episode, brother. If you want to accelerate into this new chapter in your life and get a boost into your badass journey, sign up for a free 45-minute consultation for post breakup or divorce coaching. All the info is in the episode description. Also, please remember to like and comment. And if you know anyone who could use this info in their badass journey, please share this episode with them. None of this will be possible without you guys, so thank you again, and I will see you in the next episode.