Reclaiming Your Closet: Your Closet is a Map of Your Past Selves

Your closet is not just clothes. It's a map of your past selves. Old identities. Old chapters. Old versions of you that you've outgrown. And if you want to reclaim your life, you have to reclaim your closet. In this May series kickoff, Nyomi shares the story of her 15-year-old coats in the Las Vegas desert, the Mel Robbins post that stopped her cold, and why she's teaching this AGAIN even though she already did an episode on this years ago. Because growth is a spiral, not a line. And sometimes the universe has to remind you: there's more work to do. This is Season 5. More intentional. More action. This month, we're reclaiming our closets—and our lives. IN THIS EPISODE The Divine Timing:

• Nyomi was spring cleaning (AGAIN) while planning May content for Ask Nyomi's Love & Mental Health series
• Mel Robbins' post about closets came across her timeline and STOPPED HER COLD
• She KNEW this was the May series: "This was the message. This is what we're doing."
• The universe/God had other plans than what she originally planned

The Story: 15-Year-Old Coats in the Desert:

• Nyomi cleaning her closet (her "Achilles heel")
• Cleans it out several times a year, donates bags, yet it's STILL full
• Pulling out old garments from her design days, pieces that don't fit, haven't worn in forever
• Multiple coats fall down—had them for OVER 15 YEARS
• Living in Las Vegas (THE DESERT!) where she barely wears coats
• "Maybe I wore them once or twice, if that"
• Why kept them? Expensive, loved them once, represented a version of her that felt "fancy, put together, important"
• Looking at them now: felt NOTHING. They don't fit who she is. Just taking up space.

The Honest Truth: She Taught This Before:

• "I have to be real with y'all. I've taught this before."
• A year or two ago: episode called "Clearing Space to Receive: A Journey of Physical and Mental Liberation"
• Talked about clearing closet, clearing life, making space
• THOUGHT she had done the work
• But those 15-year-old coats? STILL THERE.
• When Mel's post appeared: "That was definitely God. That was definitely the universe reminding me: there's more work to do, Nyomi."
• "There's always another layer. Growth is a spiral, not a line."

WHO THIS EPISODE IS FOR ✨ Anyone who's cleaned their closet multiple times and it's STILL overwhelming ✨ People holding onto clothes from old chapters, old bodies, old versions ✨ Anyone who feels stuck when they open their closet ✨ Those ready to do the deeper work (not just organize—RECLAIM) ✨ People who resonate with "growth is a spiral, not a line" KEY TAKEAWAYS Divine Timing:

• Mel Robbins' post appeared EXACTLY when Nyomi was spring cleaning
• The universe/God redirected her May series
• Sometimes the signs are that obvious

CONNECT WITH NYOMI Personal IG: @TheRealNyomiBanks (spelled N-Y-O-M-I) Podcast IG: @TheSeasonofSelfLovePodcast Website: AskNyomi.com Tell Nyomi: What old identity is hanging in YOUR closet?
2026 YEARLY THEME: RECLAIMED & UNASHAMED May 2026 Monthly Theme: Reclaiming Your Closet - Unashamed Letting Go Week 1: Your Closet is a Map of Your Past Selves ✨ SHARE YOUR REFLECTION After listening, journal on the 5 reflection questions and share your biggest takeaway on Instagram. Tag @TheRealNyomiBanks or @TheSeasonofSelfLovePodcast so Nyomi can celebrate your journey with you. What old identity is hanging in YOUR closet?




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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Your closet. Your closet is just, it's not just clothes. It's a map of your past selves, your old identities, your old chapters, old versions of you that you've outgrown. And if you want to reclaim your life, you have to reclaim your closet. Hey my beautiful people, welcome to the Season of Suffolk Podcast. It's your girl, God is Nami Banks here, and I am so glad that you are here with me. And y'all, y'all, we are kicking off this Maze series. Um honestly I did not plan it like this, but the universe God had other plans because the other day, the other day as um, the other day as I was scrolling through social media and I was planning for um our maze series over there at Axe, Naomi for Love and Mental Health Awareness. A post from the amazing Mel Robinson came across my timeline, right? And it stopped me dead in my tracks. And it was all about closets. I know, I know, I know. I was closets, yeah. And I knew, I knew this is what my May series was all about. This was the message, and this is what we're we're doing today. And let me tell you why, because I am in the middle of doing spring cleaning. Um, and I know you heard me several different times on several different occasions that I'm cleaning out my closet. But I am, but I am, but knowing that this is a new a new season, a new era. I knew that I needed to start off this season with a new message. So I want to welcome you to May. I want to welcome you to season five. I want to welcome you to Reclaiming Your Closet. So let me welcome you properly to this show. Welcome to the Season of Self Love Podcast. I am your host, Naomi Banks and I am so glad that you are here. As we continue to transform in life, so does this podcast. In season five, we're moving differently. More intentional, more action, less learning, more doing, less waiting, and more living. This is a space where we don't just talk about self-love, we practice it. We don't just discuss transformation, we live it. Every episode is an invitation to do the work with me. Not just listen to me talk about it. This podcast is brought to you by Ask Naomi and Elevate Me Self-Discovery. We believe that loving yourself intentionally is a foundation of true transformation. So get ready. Get your job. Because it's season five. We're doing the work together. Now let's get started. Alright, my beautiful people. Well, before we dive into the story, we're going to round ourselves with the 60 second god of meditation, alright? So today we're opening our eyes to see our closet differently. See our closet differently. Not as storage, but as a map. So, wherever you are right now, if you can just close your eyes and get comfortable, alright? So wherever you are now, just close your eyes if you can and be comfortable. Put both of your feet on the floor. Take a deep breath in. Now slowly release. And I want you to say quietly to yourself, I am ready to see my closet as a man. I inhale. Exhale. That I've been holding on to. Inhale. Exhale. I'll say I am ready to honor the past and create space for the future. Inhale. Exhale. I am open to what this world will reveal. One more breath in. Release. And I'll say, I am ready to reclaim my closet. And when you are ready, gently open your eyes. And let's begin. Right, my beautiful people. Well, let me tell you what happened the other day. So, you know, I've been doing spring cleaning again. And you know, I do this several times a year, right? In my closet. My closet. My closet has been, has always been my Achilles heel. I clean it out. I organize it. I organize it. I donate bags, bags and bags of stuff. And somehow, somehow it's still full. It's still overwhelmingly full. It's still holding things that I don't need. So the other day in my closet, and I'm pulling things out, old garments I created from my old design years ago, pieces that I don't even fit anymore, pieces that I haven't worn in forever, right? And then these coats fall down. Multiple coats. And y'all, I've had these coats for over 15 years. 15 years. Mind you, I live in a desert. I live in Las Vegas. Where we don't even really wear coats, not the coats that I had, the petticoats. I think I probably wear them maybe once or twice, if that. If that. But I've been holding on to these coats for 15 years. And why? I don't even know. Maybe because they were expensive, maybe because I loved them at one time. Maybe because they represented a version of me that I felt fancy or put together or important. But when I looked at them the other day, I felt nothing. I felt nothing. They didn't fit who I am now. They didn't serve me. They were just taking up space. So I thought, okay, progress, right? Okay, I'm gonna let them go. I'm letting them go. I'm moving in the right directions, right? Right? And then I seen Mel Robinson post. Mel Robins post. So Mel Robins posted that, you know, that she had this carousel about closets. And the first slide says, Your closet is not just closed, it's a map of your past selves. And I stopped scrolling. I stopped scrolling because it hit me. Now I have to be real with y'all. Because I've taught this before. I taught this about cleaning the closet, about releasing old things about a year or two ago, and I did an episode called Clearing Space to Receive, a journey of physical and mental liberation. I don't know if y'all remember it, but if you do go back and listen to it. And I talked about clearing your closet and clearing your life and making space for what's coming, right? And I thought that I had done the work. I thought that I have done the work. But those 15-year-old coats that were still there. And when and when mailposts came across my timeline, that was definitely God. That was definitely the universe reminding me there's more work to do, Naomi. You see, there's always another layer. You know, so this isn't me standing on a mountain saying, I mastered this. With this scissors, this is me saying, I taught this, I lived this, and I'm doing it again because I needed the reminder. Because that's the real work, y'all. Coming back to the same lesson at a deeper level. I'm gonna say that again. That's because the real work is coming back to the same lessons at deeper levels, at deeper chapters, and get this with more wisdom, with more wisdom. So let me tell you what Mel Post said and why it hit differently this time. So she went on to say that most closets are filled with clothes that no longer fit, clothes from old chapters of your life, and clothes you bought for a version of you that never arrived. And y'all, when I tell you, I felt seen, I felt seen. Those 15-year-old coats, old chapters, the version of me who wore fancy coats. I wasn't even living in the desert then. But she no longer exists, she no longer exists anymore. But here's what got me when Mel said your closet should support who you are now and who you are becoming, and I realized my closet is not supporting who I am now. My closet is not supporting who I am now, it's holding on to who I was, and not even the real me, but the version of me who I thought that I should be. Man, that post was a sign, it was a message, it was a nudge from God, it was a nudge from the universe saying, Naomi, there's more that you need to let go. You're not done yet. You are not done yet. So here's what I want you to understand. Your closet is not just about clothes, it's about energy, it's about identity, it's about you holding on to what you're ready to release. It's about holding on to in what you are ready to release. See, when you open your closet, you're not just looking at fabric, you're looking at the job that you used to have, you're looking at the relationship that you used to be in, you're looking at the body that you used to have, you're looking at the life that you thought you were going to live. You're looking at the person that you thought that you were supposed to be. Every piece of clothing in your closet, it tells a story, and some of those stories, they're not yours anymore, they're not yours anymore. Some of those stories in my closet, they're not mine anymore. But what we do, we hold on. We do hold on because I spent money on this, or maybe I'll wear it again someday, or this used to make me feel beautiful, or I'll fit into it again when I lose weight, or this reminds me of a good time, and all of those reasons, they're keeping you stuck in the past, they're keeping you attached to all identities, they're blocking you from becoming who you are meant to be. So when Mel says something else in her post that hit me hard, too. She said, You are not choosing an outfit. What you're doing, you are confronting old identities. I want you to read that again. I'm gonna read that again. You are confronting old identities. So when you stand in front of your closet every morning trying to figure out what to wear, you're not just picking clothes, you're deciding which version of me am I going to be today? And y'all cannot tell me that y'all have not felt that way. I felt that way this morning, just trying to figure out what I'm gonna wear to go work out in my gym. No one is going to see me but me, myself, and I. And if your closet is full of old versions, versions that don't exist anymore, versions that never existed, a version that you're done being, then every morning is a confrontation. Every morning is a reminder of who you're not. Y'all hear that? That shit is exhausting, that shit is draining, and that's why your closet feels overwhelming. Because it's not about the clothes, it's about the identities that those clothes represent. So let's talk about the three types of clothes that we hold on to. So let's break them down, the three types of clothes that fill most closets, and these come from Male's posts, but I'm adding my own spin because I live this. All right, type one, clothes that no longer fit. And I'm not just talking about size, I'm talking about fit for your life, fit for who you are. You know, those 15-year-old coats, they don't fit my life anymore. I don't go to those events that I used to go to. I don't live in the climate that I used to live in. I don't move the way I used to move. They might still zip up a button up, but they don't fit. They don't fit, they don't fit, they don't fit my lifestyle. And then type two, clothes from old chapters of your life, the corporate job that you left, the relationship that ended, the city that you moved away from, the version of you that was trying to be someone that you're not. You see, these clothes hold the energy of those chapters, and every time you see them, you pull back into that time, that identity, that story, and in type three. This is a good one, y'all. The clothes you bought for a version of you that never arrived. This the one. This is the one. The dress you bought for a fancy event that you never got invited to, or the workout clothes that you bought when you were going to start going to the gym every day, the someday when I'm that size jeans, or the clothes that represent a fantasy, a version of you that you thought you should be, or a life that you thought you should have, and they taking up space, physical space, emotional space, mental space. So then what happens when your closet is full of old identities? What happens when you're surrounded by clothes that don't fit who you are now? You feel stuck, you feel stuck, you feel like you can't move forward because you're constantly being reminded of who you used to be, or who you tried to be, or who you thought you should be. And you start to feel overwhelmed because every time you open your closet, you are confronted with too much, with too many choices, with too many memories, too many versions of yourself that you're trying to hold on to at once, and then you feel disconnected from yourself because nothing in your closet, I mean, nothing in your closet reflects who you are, who you actually are. It all it's all a reflection of who you were or who you thought you should be, and that disconnection, and that disconnection that shows up in your life, in your confidence, in your clarity, in your ability to move forward. So here's where we bring it back to our theme: reclaim it on a shame. Because if you want to reclaim your life, you have to let go of the old versions. You have to release the identities that no longer serve you, you have to clear the space physically, emotionally, energetically, for who you are becoming, and you have to do it without shame. No shame for the money spent, no shame for the body that you used to have, no shame for the dreams that didn't come true, no shame for the person that you used to be. What you do is that you honor those versions of yourself and you thank them, and then you let them go, you let them go. That's unashamed letting go. That's what May is about. That is what May is about. So here's what we're going to do this month. For the entire month of May, we're reclaiming our classes, not just organizing it, not just decluttering, but we're reclaiming. We're going to confront the old identities. We're going to release what no longer serves us. We're going to clear the space for who we're becoming, and we're going to do it unapologetically. Unapologetically is what we're going to do. So, week one, this week, your closet is a map of your past selves. So we're identifying the old identities and we're naming the stories. We're seeing the map for what it is. And then week two, how does this make me feel? We're learning the one question that changes everything. Not should I keep this, but how does it make me feel? And then week three from pressure to possibilities. We're transforming our closet from places of pressure and shame into places of possibility and joy in week four. Unashamed letting go. We're physically releasing, donating, and clearing and celebrating the freedom that comes with letting go. This is season five. This is more action. This is more. More action is more intentional. And this is doing the work. All right. All right. So before we close, I want to give you some reflection questions for this week. And these are going to help you start seeing your closet as a map. All right. So question one. Question one. What old identities are hanging in my closet? What old identities are hanging in my closet? I want you to think about it. What chapters of your life are represented? What versions of yourself? Is it the corporate woman or the corporate man? Is it the new mom or the new father? Is it the party girl or the party boy? Um, is it the trying to be someone that I'm not version? What chapter in your life are you are being represented? And question two. What clothes am I holding on to that represent who I thought I should be instead of who I actually am? What clothes am I holding on to that represent who I thought I should be instead of who I actually am? The fancy dress for the event you never went to, the workout clothes for the routine you never started, or the someday clothes. And question three. What stories am I telling myself about why I can't let go? What stories am I telling myself about why I can't let go? I spent too much money. I might wear it again. I'll fit into it someday. Question four. How does my closet make me feel when I open it? How does my closet make me feel when I open it? Does it make me feel overwhelmed, ashamed, stuck, excited? Does it make me feel supported? Or does it make me feel drained? How does my closet make me feel when I open it? And question five. If my closet could only hold clothes that support who I am now and who I am becoming, what would I keep? I'm gonna say the question again, one more time. If my closet could only hold clothes that support who I am now and who I am becoming, what would I keep? This is the vision question. What stays and what goes? What stays and what goes? All right, those are your reflection questions for the week. All right, so before we close, I want you to repeat this with me, alright? I want you to repeat this with me, y'all ready? My closet is a map of my past selves. I honor who I was. I release who I am no longer. I make space for who I am becoming. I let go without shame. I am reclaimed. I am unashamed. I am ready. Beautiful, beautiful. All right, my beautiful people. Well, welcome to May. Welcome to Reclaiming Your Closet. This month we're doing the work. We're confronting old identities. We're clearing space and we're letting go. And on Action Wednesday, we're starting the actual work. We're going to do inventory on our closets. Identify the three types of clothes and begin the release process. And if this episode has resonated with you, please share it. Leave a review and DM me on Instagram at the real Naomi Banks. That's spelled with the Y-N-Y-O-M-I. And tell me what old identities is hanging in your closet. Or also you can follow us at this, excuse me, at the season of self-love podcast on Instagram as well. So until Action Wednesday, this is your girlie goddess Nami Banks, reminding you to be good to one another and yourselves and always keep it sexy. Love yourself first so you can love others well. Have an amazing day. Have a good one.

SPEAKER_00 27:32

The season of self love is brought to you by Ask Naomi and Elevate Me Self Discovery. Don't just listen. Do the work, transform your life. For more, visit asknaomi.com or follow us on Instagram at the Season of Self Love Podcast.