Grey on the Rocks
No scripts. No pretending to have all the answers. Just honest conversations, good stories, different perspectives, and plenty of laughs from two guys who have seen a little bit of everything.
A podcast about life, laughs, and the world on the rocks.
Grey on the Rocks
Why the Big Pause
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This season finale is a bit earlier than we'd planned. Thanks to all our crew for hanging with us; we will be back in a few months or so.
In the meantime, keep in touch with us and keep being good humans. Patreon is paused until we're back for season two.
Cheers!
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Doing it line. We are going line. Welcome to Parade on the Rocks. Mike and I just finished the one of the longest pre-shows probably in the morning. Yeah, we're almost an hour looking at the clock.
SPEAKER_01It uh we needed the pre-show though. This one, this episode has been two weeks in the making. Episode 10.
SPEAKER_00Well, two weeks and 26 years. Yeah, probably so true. Yeah. Uh it's it's uh the 29th of September. Yes. And it's uh eight o'clock a.m. central time. So the rocks part is not about whiskey this morning. And I don't know, I mean, I guess I don't know what you have in your coffee, but this is a good thing.
SPEAKER_01No, I definitely have just coffee.
SPEAKER_00So uh thanks for joining us. And I know we've missed the last couple weeks, and our dedication, just like it always has been, was every week and uh just life. And uh here's here's where we're at. Should we should we start off with what we're doing? Yes, uh, because I I think it's important. So uh we've we've had this is our tenth episode, we're in season one of uh Gray on the Rocks, and we are gonna take a break. We're we're gonna pause uh Patreon. So those of you that are that are uh making the monthly payments, thank you, and we're gonna pause that until we come back where you don't need to pay for our vacation.
SPEAKER_01Yep, appreciate that.
SPEAKER_00That wasn't that wasn't part of the deal. Um, so we're gonna pause that and uh uh and we're gonna take some time because and we'll explain here in a little bit what's going on. We're both just at a busy time, and rather than adding the stress of trying to keep this going, we wanted to let you know where we're at uh and and and kind of go from there. So uh I guess Mike, anything to add from that perspective before we get into the nuts and bolts of no, I think not really.
SPEAKER_01I think it's important that we set the expectation right away that you're not gonna get something every week for a while now because of life, all the things, right?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So we'll start with the easy one, me. I've got so I've I've got a uh a grandson, new grandson that uh he's uh you know, it has been a couple weeks because the last time we got together, he was just bored, and and you know, now some weeks later he's off uh the the the hoses and and all that stuff. I think either today or tomorrow he might be able to go home from the NICU. And and I still go back, you know, uh a baby born in that 32 weeks when we were kids was scary, right? Like that was a family preparing for a service. Like I remember, I remember that's all it was. And and now it's it that's just what we do. We just have babies early and and we get them up strong enough to, and there are parameters that they have to meet, including one I didn't realize this to be is it 60 or 90 minutes in a car seat, uh, to be able to do that before they can go home. Like there's some tests that they do. So once he passes all this stuff, then he gets to go home and and the family will be all together. Um, and that's that's a joy for me. Like, that's not even a stressful thing, but it is a thing, right? So this is where we're at. And what's what's taking my time these days, I've talked a little bit before we did a whole show about starting up a business, and uh, I'm I'm feeling the the pressures of that now, and not not in a bad way, just in a way that okay, I need to focus on that, and and I've got some things that I need to accomplish. And this doesn't take away the time of it, but it does take away the scheduling of it, if that makes sense. You know, Mike and I both have uh things in our lives that we've been able to sort of schedule around. And each time we've done a podcast, all both of them, we get we get to a point that, oh, you know, as as much dedicated as we are doing this, trying to find, you know, and and realistically, we need to set aside three hours to do a show, even though it doesn't last that long because we've got the prep time, and then you know, and then we do have the production time and and putting it out, and and we're just at a point that right now it's not easy to do that. You know, our intent was at a time when we could obviously have our whiskey together, and and that just hasn't worked out for a few weeks now. Uh so we're doing it in the morning when we have extra phlegm, and uh, you're welcome.
SPEAKER_01That's free of charge.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's free of charge. And and you've had a bunch of that extra phlegm anyway, so that's been part of the part of the struggle. Um, so that's you know, that that's basically where I'm at is I'm winding down, excuse me, I'm winding down a day job. I still have that until November 6th. And at the same time, I'm winding up some things and and uh joyfully doing some things with my church and around the community that are uh they're filling my my soul up, right? These are these are things, and and with you too, Mike. I mean, you've got some some medical stuff I know you'll talk about, but you're also the busyness comes from things that fill up your your soul also, they're things you enjoy, and and we're both kind of at that point in our in our careers, right? Your retired career and my need to earn a living career, that that uh that they're they're good for us, and they do take the time. So uh our our commitment, and and this is my commitment to Mike, and and for everybody that's listening, uh, you all know that this is the therapy for Mike and I, right? Like this is our the therapy that we've built up over uh you know almost three decades now. Yeah. Um that that we'll continue to do this. Mike and I will get together, uh, but basically it's just gonna be pre-shows the whole time. Maybe we'll record little snippets to put out there, but it's not gonna be what we want for this show. Um, so we're we're gonna pause it. And and I think, you know, Mike, we talked a little bit about this when you know, looking at your schedule and things that are coming up, uh maybe December at the very earliest, but probably into next year before we really come back for a second season.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, there this winter it really got booked out for me fairly quickly. I was very surprised. Plus, you're gonna be in a phase of your business where it's gonna take a lot of time, both physically and mentally, investment to move that forward. That's I remember what it was like when we opened Spectrum. That first six months, man, it it it's it's your whole life. Everything revolves around that, yeah. And yeah, so for me, we uh um I fly, I'm teaching a counter-abduction course on Saturday, and then I fly out on Sunday for a week of training in Mesa, Arizona, which I do every year. Um, then I come back and I'm home for a week, but uh several medical appointments, and then I'm gone for another week. I leave that Saturday to drive to my home state to pick up my brother and my dad because we are going on a road trip to Mount Pleasant, South Carolina. For those of you who don't know, it's it's it's near Charleston, but and you can see Fort Sumner, which is kind of cool. I've actually kayaked around it. That's how I know where the the we're going to see the the USS Yorktown CVS 10, the aircraft carrier, the fighting lady, the second Yorktown. The first one is at the bottom of the ocean in the Pacific. Um I got to see it years ago when I was a field office commander in Grand Forks, North Dakota. We did a leadership summit in Charleston, did a kayaking tour.
SPEAKER_00You didn't kayak from Grand Forks out to I mean, I was gonna, but they said no.
SPEAKER_01They wouldn't pay the per diem every day. Take me, do do the Lewis and Clark route.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, there you go.
SPEAKER_01Um, so I got a chance to find out that that's where the Yorktown was. And I thought that was really cool. And so this has been uh years in the making, like um almost 20 years in the making. So we're taking him out there.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, what a cool trip, man. I'm I'm excited for that one for you.
SPEAKER_01Just so we can spend some time, me, my brother, my dad, and hear him tell some stories about his time on the Yorktown because that was one of his um favorite parts about being in the Marine Corps being stationed in the security detachment on that aircraft carrier. Now it's a dry dock, not dry docked, it's it's a docked um it's a wet dock. It's a wet dock uh museum that you can go through. And the Marine Corps detachment's still there, and it's just gonna be really awesome to drive there and back. Um, and then that puts me in a November, yeah. Which um the first weekend of November, I'll be in Montana for a wedding.
SPEAKER_00Uh, and then in in can I can I say where it's at? Yeah, go for it. It's in Bozeman, which we just learned which one was it? Was it Gibson?
SPEAKER_01Gibson, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, Gibson has their their like their production is is there in I didn't know it was that close.
SPEAKER_01It was kind of great for me to know that that's where it is.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I've been to Martin, which is in New Jersey. Uh also weird. I didn't know that happened until I got there. Drove around the curve and boop, there it was. So uh so yeah, so you okay. Before we get in, so that's that's happening too. So that's yeah, and that's all just your schedule stuff. And what I wanted to point out here now, now that you kind of get a picture of of what's what's happening, um, for for Mike and I to try because we did. We started talking about well, if we do it on this Tuesday evening in a couple weeks, we could maybe do a show, but you're gonna be somewhere else, and you know, the the logistics of getting it all set up, possibly we could make it work, but that's at the end of a busy day for both of us, and we both realize that okay, that's not gonna happen. So this is the big pause. That's that's what this is is just we're we're done for now because we can't give you the quality that that we think is important from yeah, perspective either.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and and we just don't have time to look at relevant issues either, like for us, like because that's kind of what this podcast is.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we're gonna have our own issues, yeah. Yeah, and yeah, I mean we're gonna have a lot to talk about. Yeah, um, so that's that's just the scheduling part of what's happening in your life right now, Mike.
SPEAKER_01And oh yeah, and on top of I'm teaching uh a course for a college, right? I forgot about that in October, in between all of this stuff. Uh I'm teaching uh um a subject control course for a local college for their corrections officers.
SPEAKER_00So and also don't you have uh uh what do you what do you teach for the uh school of massage?
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, I got pathology that starts in January.
SPEAKER_00So all right, that'll be the next thing. So yeah, I that one hasn't interrupted us in the past though, because that's just a part day.
SPEAKER_01Yep, in the morning, two hours twice a week. Yeah, I just taught CPR this weekend, so man, yeah, that that's a lot. This this uh fall is probably the busiest with training and travel because I just came back from um Canada doing a training trip, counter-obduction trip that I got paid for. So this has probably been the the busiest schedule out that I have been so far, honestly.
SPEAKER_00And fortunately, I mean it's a busy schedule, but you have toned your body and your skeletal structure to be the strongest of any human being in the entire universe. So I mean you're you're you're fully, I mean, you are essentially Superman. Um, if Superman had uh Kryptonian uh injected into his bones. That's basically just to bring it around full circle to what reality is at this point.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no kidding. Yeah, because I've got all of that happening, yeah. On top of having a upper respiratory infection that I just can't seem to kick at all.
SPEAKER_00I just spilled coffee all over myself here. I thought you were the one with the shakes. What's going on?
SPEAKER_01Um I think I might have given them to you. Did you give me MS? I didn't give you the MS. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's my gift to everybody. I try and spread it.
SPEAKER_00Stop.
SPEAKER_01You didn't realize it was infectious.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, all right. I think I'm okay.
SPEAKER_01It's gonna wake up for you.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01So on top of all of that, yeah, there you go. Uh on top of all of that, just so our listeners know, there are some medical procedures. I know this will surprise everybody. That I I uh have now become kind of like critical mass. We're reaching that critical mass point where I have to do something. Um, I do have to have another fusion in my cervical spine. Uh, and that kind of like we knew it was coming, but yeah, it just it was fine until it wasn't like a week ago, and then it really wasn't. And so, and I was out for the entire weekend, like drugged up, had to wear my cone of shame, all that stuff.
SPEAKER_00Um, if you're if you're watching, you actually will notice that Mike is more of a bobblehead these days because it's it's at the top now that we're dealing with, right?
SPEAKER_01Like, yeah, it is, it's right above my current fusion, so I have to get that taken care of. I gotta go see my neurologist, and we're gonna get a neurosurgical consult. Lots of imaging done in between my traveling weeks. I'll be going to Fargo and Bismarck to get imaging done because I go through I don't go through the local hospital to have anything done. It's a bad idea.
SPEAKER_00Your former employer?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, my former employer. I don't let them touch me for surgery. Yeah um, so I have to travel to like a lot of times it's Fargo to get stuff done. But for Fargo, the hospital in Fargo that my neurologist works for has the best MRI machine in the state. So with the best resolution, all of that stuff. So she prefers that I go there, which is fine. I just go out there the night before, stay and come home. And then on top of that, we found out well, what we thought was like a tear in my right hip, which I've had on my left side before I got replaced, is actually there. But the doctor took the image of my current my right hip and overlaid um the old image of my left hip uh on on the um x-rays uh of because I have a full hip replacement on my left side, and it looks my right hip looks exactly like my left pre-surgery, like it's like smashed into each other.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, what you're saying is I get a whole brand new one at some point. So what are those made out of? Is it ceramic or titanium or combination?
SPEAKER_01Uh so the the the cup itself inside your hip, because it'll dig out a little bit of your your pelvic bone, and then they'll put a cup in there and they'll drill it in with that's like ceramic and silicone. Okay, yep. And then it's titanium. I yeah, I have four pounds of metal in my left hip.
SPEAKER_02Huh.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and it actually created about a quarter of an inch height uh length difference in my legs, which makes sense.
SPEAKER_00It broke your other hip then, yeah.
SPEAKER_01It took about a year for it to finally settle in, and because I was compensating so much, and and um, like my previous life of all the things that I used to do, jumping out of planes and endurance running, and all that didn't help it, it wore it down.
SPEAKER_02Right.
SPEAKER_01Endurance running is not healthy for your body, like you uh people get addicted to it. I was I would go out and run 14 miles on a Saturday for fun, geez, but it is not physically healthy for you. So, anyway, everything's kind of coming to a boil, and we have to start marching out what is more important than right now. Cervical spine is more important, so I get hip injections to cover the pain there so that we can march out the surgery for my spine, and the recovery for that is long. Yeah, I couldn't drive when I had it done the first time. I couldn't drive for six weeks. Can't even drive yourself, yeah. And if you're a passenger, you really you gotta wear your cone of shame and you gotta oh yeah, yeah, I suppose. I tried not to leave the house for six weeks.
SPEAKER_00You can't you can't sneeze, god forbid, yeah. You're gonna blow everything out if that happens, yeah.
SPEAKER_01So we're marching all of this out into next spring, basically, is when things will all of the things will be done.
SPEAKER_00And one of the yeah, and it one of the also also MS, right? Like there's yeah, so there's and but that the reason that is important, I mean you've had some incidents and and you've been able to isolate those and and you know work on those, uh but that also all you know, among all of that then reduces your uh ability to fight any kind of illness. So it does and I mean of all the things to choose to do in your retirement, you're you're teaching kids to roll around and snot on each other, and you're in the middle of all, yep. And and so, you know, the you know even even the times when we have clear schedules, and I'm not putting putting extra uh stress for you, Mike, but it is for us, right? Like trying to get that worked out because even if all of the stars align and everything is set up, and and it's not just you, why it could be me. I've uh got stuff too, you know, weird things come up and and family and and illnesses and and also just don't wanna, right? Like we've okay, we've finally got four hours of we could fit a show in here, uh, or kill some zombies or or something, and we just need that downtime. And it's not that this is stressful, this is healthy uh for both of us, and and we appreciate that you're part of this journey with us. Um, it's just that we we need right now this pause, and and we'll we'll we'll come back to this because the other the other side to this then is we will take a pause for a couple months and we're both gonna get uh itchy and scratchy and and jumpy and like man, we need to get back and and and communicate with people again. So uh we just we love the fact that we've got folks that want to listen and and watch and and talk with us about this kind of stuff. Um, and it's a way to stay connected. And and as a as a result of all of this, what we've done through our podcasts has been instrumental in starting this business that I'm doing. By the way, I want to give a shout out uh to my uh uh brother and sister-in-law up in in Williston. They do, if you can see it right now, that's my logo for the business. They do they do woodwork and and uh lasering and and things like that. They they sent me some pretty cool stuff. So I'm gonna work with them to get some more and and uh start these shows up. Um, I've got my first client starting tomorrow. We're gonna get the tech stuff set up, we'll start recording, and I'll figure out what production is gonna look like. And um, you know, even for this show that that we've done over the years, when we first started this show, and this was the first time I really got into uh producing for online content, I've been using a program called Hit Film Express. And as I started looking into the business, and you know, maybe I should you know get something more than just the free version of it, I discovered three years ago or more now that it was bought by a company that just decommissioned it. So they it was a company that got rid of it uh because they were a competitor. I can't even buy the add-ons anymore, it's not supported, it's it's antiquated in in that world. So I found another program called uh Da Vinci Resolve uh that also has a free version that I could use. So I'm I'm starting to transition to that one because it has support and and it does some things that this one doesn't. Um, so just a lot of stuff, a lot of lessons learned, a lot of new opportunities with software and um you know, just learning some of the ins and outs of being a business person.
SPEAKER_01Well, yeah, there's there's a ton to learn, man.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, and all the little things that you have to do, like okay, no, I need QuickBooks. I knew I was gonna need something. QuickBooks is a way to go. I've got questions for my accountant, I've got bank accounts and all these things that just need to be set up. And that's if if I have enough clients for this to be my job, this is all worth it. If this becomes uh a side hustle and I need a full-time day job, and and this is just something I do on the side, this is a lot of work for that, and and I could still make it work. But uh that's that's kind of a that's also uh on my plate in the next couple of months, too. Like I have uh in November and December is my big push that I get enough clients to justify this as what I do, and and you know, this is this is how I earn my living, or it becomes this is what I do, and also I need to get a job and go through all of that process and then have the job and balance that with doing this also. Um wrapping it down or or whatever it is. I haven't spent so much money that I can't just walk away from it right now, and I don't know if I would get to that point because I'm I'm certainly not borrowing any money, I don't need a grant to get this started. We already have the equipment, you know. We've been joking for years that we we did this to justify getting the things that we've just wanted. Like I wanted this command center that I have here, and and I don't know you felt the same way. Yep. Um, it wasn't about earning money, it was just so we could have the things and and we could justify it in doing what we're doing. Well, now I have this and I don't need to pay more. You know, I've had to buy a couple things and spend money on a couple things, but not any more than you and I have spent on gadgets in a quarter, right? Like that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, we've spent more on dumber things.
SPEAKER_00More on moron. More on moron. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01It's a true statement. Yeah, it's it it'll be a pivotal time for your business. I I remember the big push for clients when we first opened, man. We it it's tough to get your name out there, get a reputation built, a good reputation in whatever yeah, whatever industry you're in, yeah, and then keep it right. Because we're in what year nine, I think, of being open. Yeah, almost a decade now that we've been open.
SPEAKER_00I think a lot too in in terms of how your business has morphed over the years, um, because it was it had a completely different focus at the beginning. Um, you're you're you know, the you guys always called it the backside, right? The uh uh the the butt of the business, if uh if you will. Um martial arts has has evolved some, but it it's martial arts is been the focus, and it's been essentially you're the face, right? Like you're you're the the part of the business that runs that. And then the other side has has uh changed a little bit in terms of what's been done with the with the space and What the focus has been. And you know, School of Massage wasn't even on your radar uh when you guys started the business. So I mean, to say that nine years ago you guys were in this position and to look at where you're at now, and that's that's a lot of uh effort and dedication and uh uh commitment to making that dream come true. And and you know, kudos to you guys for making it happen. And it is an inspiration for for others that are you know thinking about what are we gonna do with life. And I'm excited. We have a business uh or board meeting coming up this weekend, right? Yeah, this weekend, yeah, on time. And I've I've heard that there's conversation of a five-year plan on what's gonna be happening with the business. Um, and yes, you know, it won't be something that we talk about here, obviously, unless it's relevant, but it's it's exciting to me to be part of watching how the businesses come together and and learning that okay, there's a plan for what's gonna happen with it. Because, you know, as we've we've talked about, you know, we're we're middle-aged dudes. That's how this happened, this show, uh, talking about middle-aged dude stuff. And part of that is succession planning, whatever that looks like. It might be succession planning, as in who's gonna be mowing my lawn in 10 years when I don't want to anymore, who's gonna take this business over, what is my role in the business look like? Um, how am I gonna wipe my butt? You know, all of this stuff that we have to think about. Like, how are we gonna how are we gonna handle these things? Uh, so I'm I'm excited to hear how that's gonna go. And I think that's a part of of you know the the business leadership also.
SPEAKER_01One of the things that uh a quote that I heard about a martial arts school that really stuck with me, I heard probably about four months ago that if you have a martial arts school that cannot run without you being there, you don't um you don't own a business, you have a hobby that pays for itself.
SPEAKER_00So hopefully pays for itself.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, one of the things and luckily, luckily our program does. Um we our just our kids karate program alone, we think have man, we I think last class we had 22 kids in it.
SPEAKER_00Nice, wow.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's a lot of and we have more on the rolls that don't show up, like we have the kids come and go, right, with whatever's going on in their parents' life, but um that are still paying, and then our kids' jujitsu program on top of that, and then adult karate and jujitsu, but our kids' programs usually keep gyms open, yeah, dojos open. But um getting to a point in that where I can not be the guy that teaches every single class is tough because it takes years. The front of the house is morphing very well, and the five-year plan there is awesome, and it's I think it's gonna work. I'm excited to talk about it at the business meeting at the board meeting, but for the school massage, but the back side of the house, I don't know if I can not be there for a long time still.
SPEAKER_00Well, and that's yeah, well, that that is you do love that you've you've stepped away at times when you have had other leaders, and I know that that that wears on your soul. I've seen that, yeah, because you that is the part that is fun for you and and and feeds you. Um, so how how is that gonna look? And you know, maybe you don't have this fully vetted yet. How is this gonna work when you're out of commission? Because you will legitimately, for just out of this conversation, at least 12 weeks of recovery, and that's at a bare minimum that you're not gonna be able to be at the school, right? Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01We so we have a bunch of coaches, which I really appreciate those guys uh on both sides of the aisles, Jiu Jitsu and uh karate that step up to the plate. Like me being gone for the next week, we we program out coaches for that week. There are times though that we just have to cancel class, and that sucks because we don't have any coverage because these guys have ex other lives. My coaches are not full-time coaches at the gym, they have other lives and other jobs, and they just step in when they can. So, man, yeah, I don't know how it looks post-surgery. Yeah. We will see. I mean, I'm usually on the mat sitting within two weeks of having a surgical procedure. That doesn't take long for me. I'm not doing anything, but it doesn't take long for me to be just be there on the mat.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because that's what the doctors want is for you to be there and be attempted to. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And it's funny too, people like those. Uh there's jokes um still to this day about um those those times in in the gym because I, of course, am on pain medication as I'm I'm sitting there on the mats trying to teach, and my senior students have to kind of steer the lesson. Like sometimes I forget in the middle of the lesson what the lesson is. I just look at them and they'll tell me, like, no, we're we're we're learning this. Oh yeah, that's right. That's right. Yeah, back on track. Yeah, luckily I've been doing it long enough that I can just pull it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, pull a lesson out. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01And our curriculum is pretty standard. I mean, all all the coaches know because we write the lesson up what lesson it is they can they can do it.
SPEAKER_00Oh, well, that's helpful. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01It's easy. I've got it, I've got it pretty standardized now so that I don't have to be there and somebody who's a coach can walk and be like, oh, it's lesson four for fundamentals. I know that lesson. Yeah. Here we go. We'll see. I don't know, man. It's it's gonna be a weird winter time for the back side of the house. We'll we'll see how it goes. Yeah, but it's filling up. Well, that's good. Yeah, which is a weird time to to not be there. That bothers me quite a bit.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Such is like man, it yeah, it's it's it's um I I got very frustrated um when I got both diagnoses from the for my neck and my hip from the doctor. I spent a day being kind of mad. And I need to get I need to, I always need that. I have to get that out of my system, and then we just move forward. Yeah, there because there's nothing I can't stay mad. There's nothing I can do about it.
SPEAKER_00My most important question then, on that day, what did you snack on? Oh, don't tell me it wasn't anything.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, oh no, uh, yeah. Ah man, there was some I bought.
SPEAKER_00Did you go to the wait? Did you go to the store after you got the diagnoses?
SPEAKER_01I did, yes.
SPEAKER_00Oh, oh, okay. This is gonna be good then. Bring it. I got some let's play fat poker. What did you get?
SPEAKER_01I got the giant cinnamon rolls with the cream cheese frosting. Oh, yeah. All right, so that's the sweet side. What's the savory?
SPEAKER_00What do you balance that with? Tell me about the chips. Come on, that kid is excited over here.
SPEAKER_01Dude, I got two bags of um uh salt and vinegar vinegar chips and then two bags of barbecue because it was like two for whatever.
SPEAKER_00Well, yeah, you gotta get a good deal.
SPEAKER_01Obviously, I'm losing money if I don't. Obviously, and then of course oh, more. All right, more, more, more bunch of um breaded chicken fingers with um baby ray's barbecue sauce. And so I came home and I baked the chicken fingers, I ate it with the barbecue sauce, shoved a bunch of chips in my face, and I finished it with a warm cinnamon roll. And I felt so disgusted.
SPEAKER_00In my mind, you're wearing a white wife beer with with mustard stains for some reason, and you're having a schlitz. It was so bad. Somehow you you a tooth fell out, and you just it was bad, man.
SPEAKER_01It was it was I felt I was disgusted with myself, and then that takes a lot.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's that's part of the cycle, man. Uh I would have been I would have been concerned for your mental health had you not done that that part of your process. And oh man, I wrecked it. I wrecked it hard. And I can attest to this two days later, uh, because you had recovery from that. Then two days later, uh one of the texts you sent me was that you were adjusting your workout routine to to account for where your body is at right now. And then I thought, okay, so and and I even said to you, okay, so we're at that point in in grieving now. You're you're taking as much control as you can. There's got to be one thing that we each have to control, right? Yep.
SPEAKER_01And it can't be food because I have no self-control when it comes to food.
SPEAKER_00So I've I've uh I'm on a path right now. Um just the sweets are gone because my issue in working at home and and just in general is well, I I'm I crave a piece of chocolate now, but that isn't just a piece of chocolate, it's a row of bars or or a box of cookies or whatever it is. So I'm uh and I I will still from time to time have it. We had a really nice meal on Sunday, and at the end of it, uh Janita made these little these buckeye bars. So I had like a probably a two-inch square piece, like like all together. No, it was an inch. It was it wasn't that big. Anyway, so I had that and I was fine. I didn't have to follow it up with the ice cream bar that they brought over with them, the guests that we had. I didn't have to have another one later or one yesterday or anything. Uh my my uh my treat in that sense are these protein balls that Janita makes with flaxseed and peanut butter, uh and and a little bit of chocolate chips in there, just just enough to give it that little bit of like I'm I'm I yay! Finger twiddling, like ooh, yeah, yeah, I I believe I will. Yes. This is delicious. It is delicious, and and it's uh maybe once a day I might have one of those if I'm feeling that that twinge, but um, it's a slippery slope for me, and and I have to be careful with that. And I'm we're different in that you eat all of your feelings and then you're done. I eat my feelings all the time, like it's just it's a constant grazing of feelings. So let's just get away with let's get away from those and and still watching the portions. And uh we we talked in our last show about the ruck that was happening with my church, uh, and and it worked out like that that weekend was when you had just started to learn about your hip. And I think that might have been the weekend that your neck was falling apart, like when you realized it was falling apart. Um, so you didn't make it down for that and understandable and and and did that walk, and it turned out to be more like two and a half miles because I took a wrong turn. Um, it's funny because I had talked to I talked to one of the other guys that said, Hey, maybe we should walk this thing ahead of time just for safety and get a feel for it. And they're like, Well, maybe we could drive it, and and then we kind of did what you and I do. Eventually you talk yourself out of it, like we don't need to do it, it'll be fine. We got there and and I wasn't really paying attention, and we took a turn, and one of the guys on his watch were heading back, and he's like, This is not anywhere close to four miles, and then his watch actually mapped where we had walked, and I realized, yeah, we missed a whole portion of the walk that I'd planned, but it was still good, we didn't lose anybody.
SPEAKER_01It's still fellowship, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and it was, it absolutely was. There's 10 of us that walked and uh had some good conversation, and um shout out to to Pastor Carl. We had some good conversation as we were walking along there. Um, so yeah, and and all of us. Um, and and things are things are really good with our church right now, and that that is another thing that's important in my life. Um, for the last year, I've been on the the board for the church, which is really an advisory board. We're we're what's called a um unorganized church, so we don't have the official bylaws that a lot of churches do. We're part of church in Nazarene, and there are some, you know, there's a book that you follow and yada yada yada, just like you know, any any corporate structure. Um ours is because we're a small church, we don't have all of that. So essentially the pastor makes the decisions. Uh, he's chosen to have an advisory board from both our locations that help uh with those decisions and and you know keep a conscience going and everything. So uh it was a great time for me. I love the leadership part of it. I plan to continue in a leadership role in our church. I think that's it's important for me. I like to serve in that way, and and I've got the ability. You know, we're the body. We we talk about that a lot as Christians. We are the body that we've that we've been given together, all of us, and and our family needs that leadership. Well, I've been given a talent for that, whether I like it or not, so I'd rather use it for good. And and uh so yeah, we'll we'll continue to do that. And I I feel blessed for it and glad to be I was able to hand off the leadership role to a couple of other people um that are going to flourish in it, like this is their turn to to to lead and to kind of grow through that. So I'm excited for them, and I think that's an important part of what we do there. So I don't know what that was all about, but I needed to talk about it, I guess.
SPEAKER_01New seasons, man. We're we're both heading into some new and busy seasons of life, yeah. And it it just it just goes to show you it doesn't matter your age. Like I remember being in my 20s and thinking it was a busy season and my 30s, I was deploying all the time. Oh, this is a really busy season, and then I retired and I was in my 40s and got another job. Oh, this is a really busy season, and now mid-50s, and I'm like, oh my god.
SPEAKER_00Well, we're we're differently busy though, and and I think that's important for us to recognize that uh, you know, and you know, I'll go back to church because that's where I see these different seasons most apparently. We have friends most so our friends are often in the similar season as we are, right? So you you might not recognize it, but in a in a family like that, you see, you know, people with with little little kids and people with grade school and high school age kids, and those are those are busy, differently busy seasons because you and I aren't scheduling around having to pick kids up or drop them off or deal with schoolwork or we can't go on a trip because it's school time, any of those kind of things. But it's different, like we have different priorities and different needs, and and uh we see the world certainly differently than we did in our 20s or 30s or even 40s.
SPEAKER_01I I think the and the focus changes, your priorities change a bit. You know, my priorities are more centered around trying to get to retirement at some point, and faster than I thought I was going to have to get there, yeah. And spend you know, like I get to spend a lot of time with Odin. Like I get to take him to school multiple times this week, so which is an added thing, but it's a lot of fun to do. So yeah, different priorities, still busy, but different priorities. And I think um both of us have to have that. I know some people that don't. They're our age and they can just do nothing. I don't understand that at all. That makes no sense in my brain.
SPEAKER_00I think I would go crazy, but yeah, we all have uh different and it's it goes back to different purposes while we're here, right? Some and and I I look and fo I used to think, well, those are just lazy folks and good for nothing, yada yada yada. But they're they're just they're in either a season of rest or preparation or maybe even recovery. Maybe they've already done their purpose and and they're they're they're here to you know enjoy life. And God bless you, whatever, whatever your thing is. We we had a conversation at our most recent men's group uh about the Quran, and and one of the guys brought up that well, those they they promote uh child marriage and the jihad, and you know, they're they're just immoral, and you you know, you can't trust anybody that believes in the Quran, and they're absolutely wrong. And and it got to the conversation, and I said, Well, that's I've I've not read the Quran, but I know people that have studied it, and I know Muslims, and I don't believe that that's what they got from it. Now, that doesn't mean you're wrong or right, that's just not what I understand it to be. And so where we ended up though, and it was a long conversation, I won't go into all the ins and outs, but there is a need for that perspective, I think, and and by God, if that's where you're at, you need to do something about it, right? That's that's your responsibility then to either either have an outreach and understand it differently, or if that's where you're at and that's important to you, if that's the calling that you have, what are you gonna do about it? That's if that's a purpose for you, if you need to get something out of that that mindset that you have, do something. Don't just sit in it and and muck around in that that that filth of feeling that way towards other people. Do something about that. I don't have that. My my purpose in that situation, and I I believe this in in all of my heart, is that if that's what I understand about something, then I need to learn more about it because that doesn't make sense on a human level. Um, and it certainly doesn't make sense in the religion that I understand. Like Jesus doesn't preach hate others. There's nothing that we can find that says that. So if I hear that there's a group of people that that wants to do something I consider immoral, then I need to understand more about that so that we can come to them in love. And and I don't mean for this to be real preachy or churchy here, but that is something that I feel is really important. And I I struggle to think of a religion that doesn't come from love. So if we're all called to love one another, why are we fighting so damn much? Right. So man, I don't know. If that's the body when it comes to we all have these different seasons and these different things that we're supposed to be doing, if it's not all coming back to love, then I would challenge any one of us on on what we're really doing with this this life we've been given.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's my tagline is just go be a good human. If you're if if that's not what you're doing every single day, yeah, being a good human and taking care of people and being an asset in your community, yeah, then I think you're going about life incorrectly with with whatever your endeavor is.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, if you're living in angst, if you're living in discomfort and you hate something or someone uh or politics or religion, if there's that hate building in you, what are you getting out of it? What are you what joy does that bring your life and what are you doing to the people around you as a result of it?
SPEAKER_01Hence the reason why the uh um gray man no longer exists as a as a podcast. Like, what are you getting? Like, what was I getting out of that? And as a guy who's actually read the Quran and spent a significant amount of time in the Middle East and around Muslims, I can tell you that there are there are things in the Quran that um are that people would go like, oh, that's immoral, or that you like we that's against our our modern society. But there are things in the old testament, that's exactly it, yeah. Bro, you you can't be doing that. And and the that part of it for me, having been in the Middle East for you know like a decade, um is just xenophobic, in my opinion. Um, it's it is what the news is telling you to be mad at. So stop it and just be a good human, man. Just go out there and be good human and learn more.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, please, yeah, please, yeah. That growth, growth, growth, growth. We if we're not getting better, we're stagnating and slipping backwards. That's that is till till I'm not on this earth anymore. I need to be learning, and I think that is part of a difference in in some people in this life, right? Like some of us do yearn for that, and others they have enough information, right? And that there again, whatever your calling is, then whatever you got going on, if it's for good, if it's for God, if it's for love, go for it, right? So, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01If it's just to be upset about a thing, probably not the right thing. Yeah, I don't discuss politics and world events anymore.
SPEAKER_00No, not much. So we would we we did talk about this in the pre-show. Um, you know, just that one little nudge that we would want to give in the in the show here today is midterm elections are coming up, and that's where you can make a difference, right?
SPEAKER_01That's that's yeah, yeah, and you can make a difference locally too. I I I look at the most significant votes you can cast are in your city and you in in your state, so you can have the most effect on your life by doing that. And when you choose not to do that, then you allow somebody else to make the decisions for you, and therefore you forfeit your right to be mad about the outcome.
SPEAKER_00Amen. And even I've had to I've had to get to a point that even even when I vote, I'm not giving myself permission to be upset about the outcome.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I I did my part, I tried.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I'll go and I'll go into it knowing I'm voting in a way that isn't going to win. And I just need to do that for my for my soul, for my conscience. I need it helps me sleep knowing that I I I gave it my best. And if, and here's the next part of that, then if that isn't my best, if I if I leave an election uh cycle, like if it on the other side of it, wow, none of that went the way I wanted it to, and that thing in particular really bothers me. It's up to me as a citizen then to do something about it, not just revel in the the garbage. Yeah, and man, we have a tendency to do that. I do, I misery and the rhetoric.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, man. Oh, it's super easy to get caught up in that misery and rhetoric because it's catchy and it's in front of us 24-7.
SPEAKER_00And oh, yeah, that's what I was gonna say earlier. It's more than the news, it's like people aren't just getting upset about news anymore. The news is almost like a side thing, yeah. It doesn't, it's it's it's all the social media, it's all the media, it's all the social, it's everything online. Man, they talked earlier about uh um how things were when we were kids. Uh the the availability and the mess that we've created from the internet as a species. Um, you know, don't we we've talked about AI already. We're not gonna go deep diving into it. Uh, but uh, but uh where we're going with all this is is still scary. If we were doing the gray man podcast, we would, you know, your your uh your temple would be throbbing right now here. You're not wrong, man. Your brain vein would be going off, and and yeah, there's there's some scary things happening, but uh do what we can each day and and just be be prepared to live a good life.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, be a good human, man. Yeah, that's yeah. At the end of the day, and that's What we're gonna do for the next couple months while we're taking a break, trying to be a good human and work on ourselves and stay healthy because I mean that is really important. It's important when you're young, but it becomes vitally important as you get older. Like in your I it's weird to think that I'm in my mid-50s. Like my brain still thinks I'm much younger than that, but my body's like, no, bro, you're like 900.
SPEAKER_00Your your spouse sent out to the uh the family thread. You see that when you took oh okay. I'm gonna I'm gonna share it with you here. Um, being in your 50s is confusing. I think a lot of our people are gonna appreciate this. On paper, I'm 56. In my head, I'm 37. At a concert, I'm 25. After 9 p.m., here we go. After 9 p.m., I'm 87. Getting up off the floor, I'm 104.
SPEAKER_01That is 100%.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, someone makes me angry. I'm 14. I get that one. Uh, but when an 80s song comes on, and this this one really hit me. I'm 17, drunk in a field, and my mother thinks I'm at a sleepover. Amen, sister. That is she she described my life in sending that out. Man, that was exactly it. But just for the record, uh, she that was uh that was something she didn't write all that out. I don't want to, I don't want to accuse her of being 56. That's uh uh that's a mortal sin. She's much younger than that.
SPEAKER_01So 39 again.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, but she's uh she's definitely got the uh the the feelings right. So I think we got it.
SPEAKER_01That was 100% correct, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Getting up off the floor. That's actually that's something that's really important to me. I test that on a regular basis to make sure that I can still comfortably get up without using my hands. Um, but there are those days when it can be difficult. It's helpful to have it's helpful to have little dogs because I gotta get down and play with the dogs. They give me the exercise.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah, that's why I try to exercise. I gotta be able to move up and down stairs and still be healthy. I've got a grandson turning six who's like four foot one and sixty-nine pounds.
SPEAKER_00Dang, man. Not carrying him around much anymore, then.
SPEAKER_01No, I I try to lift enough weight that I can pick him up with one arm still. That's always my goal. It's like I just grab him, scoop him up with one arm, and I can still do that.
SPEAKER_00Pay for it for two weeks. Yeah, yeah. You're you're one you're one doctor visit away from getting that that uh that scooter that'll take you up and down the stairs to your basement there, man.
SPEAKER_01Well, I'm hoping that I get the platinum room executive suite next time I'm in the hospital. I've been there enough.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. Your punch card should be full.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, maybe an extra free sandwich or something. I don't know.
SPEAKER_00Get you a sandwich.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, pudding cup.
SPEAKER_00I would take the pudding cup over a uh hospital sandwich, probably.
SPEAKER_01Hospital sandwich and a pudding cup. That's what I'm getting for free. Get the share of room, but I get those two things next week.
SPEAKER_00And it's with a corpse for some reason. I don't know why. Yeah, I'm in the morgue.
SPEAKER_01Obviously, he's dead.
SPEAKER_00Hopefully, if they're in the morgue. Yeah, it's gotta be better close to it. Yeah, I think we've done some good things here today.
SPEAKER_01We have, man. This has been good.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, appreciate everybody, and uh thanks for understanding. Always, always reach out. We'll keep an eye on the the socials and and uh obviously if you have our contact info, you're welcome to reach out as well. But uh uh yeah, we're gonna go do life for a bit, and when we come back, we're gonna do it at a time when we feel we can give it uh the due diligence and and give you something that is worth uh listening to, not just uh the the drivel that sometimes we've had to do in the past. Mumbling. Guilt can be a powerful thing, but uh no, we we wanted this to be a clean, clean uh ending for now, and then uh we'll we'll have a dirty beginning, I guess. Yeah, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01We'll be back for season two with another series of things that we can talk about.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, and we'll have lots to talk about, man. Everything coming up, we'll keep notes and uh we'll catch everybody up and uh we'll go from there. So take care of yourselves, get some rest. Whatever stage of life you're in, man, just take care of yourself. That's gotta be number one. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01Go out there and be good humor.
SPEAKER_00All right, God bless. Take care, everybody.
