Manifesting Through Grief & Unworthiness ~ Mindset Monday Fall Series

 If you don’t feel deserving of what is coming your way, your mind can tell you to do all sorts of things to ruin it. STOP. You deserve it all. This week is all about pushing through the thoughts that make it feel impossible. You GOT THIS!

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Transcript

A lot of people are programmed to. When the good stuff comes in, that's when negativity comes in, because good stuff in this kind of programming gets taken away. So when we're down, there's positive energy because when you're down, there's like, I can make it. I can do it. You have this drive to succeed, like come from the gutter kind of thing.

When you're up top, it's like, whoa, shit shaky down here. This is a big. Fucking tower I'm I hope nothing topples. I hope I don't lose any of this. And that's what makes, makes you lose it.

What is up my fellow dreamers and soul searchers. Welcome to the Roxy talks, manifestation podcast, your raw, unfiltered, and unapologetic. For all things manifestation related. I'm Roxy Lee. And for the last decade, I have been researching and developing my signature 360 method, which combines behavioral science, quantum physics, and the law of attraction to help you manifest a life beyond your wildest dreams.

Visit Roxy talks.com for more info. Now let's get into it.

Got perfect SP but kept focusing on stupid things that are not even problems. I feel kind of uncomfy when I get my manifestations, but I know I'm worthy. It's kind of contradictory. I knew and still know I have. But then almost cannot feel happy for long and feel tense when 3d conforms. Yeah. Okay. So what you're talking about is classic, um, upper limit problem.

There is a book called the big leap by, by gay Hendrix. That is literally about exactly what you're talking about. Um, we even talked about this in 360, like sometimes, well, I'm gonna say two things. One of the things is that sometimes when we get our manifestations, it's actually like, even though we've worked on it a long time, it's not actually, we don't actually like it.

And we feel almost like we have to like, L like my analogy right here is like, if you ordered something you didn't like, but you ate it anyways. Cuz you felt bad that we do that with our manifestations. It's like you get it. And you're really like you to be real Frank. Sometimes your manifestations, by the time you get them, you're already outta that energy.

You've moved on and it's okay to be like, you know what, actually, I'm, I'd actually, I'd rather have this now or whatever and it's okay to send it back. But a lot of us, I think, feel like once we get our manifestations, you gotta eat it. You ordered it. You gotta eat. And so we get into this place where you end up resenting your manifestation, cuz you're forcing yourself to eat the plate of food that you didn't wanna actually eat.

You know, it's like when I ordered it, chicken fingers sounded good. But you know, in the meantime I watched a video about chickens. I don't know even gonna say anything, fill in the blanks. And now I'd rather really like some beyond tenders. So when those chicken tenders come to me, I'm not fucking eating.

And I'm sorry that this animal died and I fucked that up, but I'm not gonna make that mistake again. Right. So anyways, my point is normalize. You can find not enjoying the manifestation you manifested, who cares, how long you've been working on it. If you don't fucking like it, now, move the fuck on and get something better.

You always have that opportunity. The other thing is, again, this comes back to the upper limit problem is that a lot of people are programmed to when the good stuff comes in. That's when negativity comes. Because good stuff generally in, in this kind of programming gets taken away. So when we're down, there's positive energy because when you're down, there's like, I can make it, I can do it.

You have this drive to succeed, like come from the gutter kind of thing. When you're up top, it's like, whoa, shit shaky down here. This is a big ass fucking tower. I'm saying, I hope nothing topples. I hope I don't lose any of this. And that's what makes, makes you lose it. So both of those things I would say are coming up for me to tell you.

Definitely read the book, the big leap by gay Hendrix, because it's, it is this exact thing. And this thing is gonna get you in all areas of your life. Not just love, probably sometimes people just have it in one area, but a lot of times it's everywhere. So, um, definitely check out that book and. Understand that the, the reason why you can't feel happy for long is that because I'm just, I don't even know your story, but I already know that you probably have a, a.

In your life either. Good things have been taken away. There could be loss. There could be parents that work like weird hours or parents that aren't around there could be, um, moving or losing money or, um, like parents in the military. There could be lots of chaos in the home. Um, no real emotional stability.

These are the kind of things that will breed this kind of, uh, program. So. If that's the case for you, which is for a lot of people, um, you're definitely not alone there. You have to know that when you get to those happy feelings, when everything's okay. And as you start to feel dread, that's the program and you need to talk yourself.

Back down, right? You mm that's just my program. It's not, there's nothing to worry about. Actually, everything is taken care of. I'm not really worried. This is just, I've been programmed to do, you know, whatever it is that you have to say to, to tell yourself to not like, um, take that on and, and, and associate it with something like, for me, I'll tell you for my personally, I feel dread.

Okay. I wake up like, Not every night, but if I fall, like if I fall asleep on the couch, like sometimes I'll fall asleep on the couch, like watching whatever or something. Um, if I fall asleep on the couch and I wake up and it's like late, how do I FRA preface this? If I don't like, you know, like do my night routine and then go to bed, like a normal whatever, if I'm like kind of messed that routine up.

And I end up being like sleeping and then waking back up and then having like, you know, do my night routine, like do my face and stuff. For some reason in those like the wee hours, one, two in the morning, and there's nothing going on. It's super quiet. I just have this overwhelming sense of dread and it happens to me all the time.

And it, I just like, I, I guess now I'm thinking it's not only when I fall asleep, it doesn't matter. Who cares? You guys don't need to know exactly every detail about my life, every like where I'm sleeping every night. But, um, it's in my house.  it's next to my husband. Uh, everything's fine. But sometimes it's just, you know, like we will.

I'll sleep watching our stories, like nor I think people do that. Right. Um, but either way, my point is that I have a, I don't know why yet I haven't pinpointed what it is yet. That makes me feel so much dread at night, but I feel dread at night and I have to, and it's, it's related to security, like things being paid, making enough money to cover, pay all my employees and pay my rent and all those things.

Cuz that's my that's programming that I have. So at night I have noticed that I really have to. Always pop my affirmations on so I can not mine, but affirmations I can listen to so that there's stuff going on. It's not just completely silent. And I have to really be there and conscious with myself and talk myself out of the dread that my body feels like.

I feel the dread before my thoughts get there. So there's some sort of programming about the, I don't know what it is yet. I'll figure it out.  but my point is that, um, you know, the dread is the programming, the thoughts that go along with it may be programming as well, but I can do something about the thoughts.

I may not be able to do something about the fact that I'm triggered into feeling this like, oh, shit feeling, but I don't have to like, oh yeah. What? Oh, shit, I don't have to do that. I don't have to go down the road of what oh, shit means. I can think thoughts about things being okay. And soothe myself even while I'm feeling dread and that.

The best possible thing I can do in my opinion, because I don't wanna go down the road of what's down there. I already know what's down there. It's a bunch of bullshit.  doesn't really help me. It's like, what am I gonna do at 2:00 AM? That's gonna fucking make the, you know, everything that I'm worried about actually magically just go away, right when it's like, it's not even like real problems.

It's it's it's programmed problem.

Okay. Bell says bell cosmetics. Roxy, can you help me with my Instagram situation and growing my platform to attract supportive people? It's been two years in my account is full of majority haters and non-support okay. They're asking me to, I need to ask you, is your you're doing cosmetics. Is your cosmetics on a.

regular cosmetics account or is it off of your personal account? Oh, so what's the cosmetics. I, I, you know, I already, I can tell you, I don't know what your YouTube is, but I'm already confused. And I think that might be the problem, cuz just instinctively. I just felt that there was, there's a clash of what's you're presenting and who your account is targeted to attract.

Cause. I had, um, my personal Instagram account has like 40,000 followers on it. I haven't, I mean, I don't really post on there at all anymore, but

you said you're also transgender and some of your people from your Insta are from your past, you have some dances up this channel is for subliminals and mostly edits. Okay. Okay. So, all right. Yeah. All right. My instincts were okay. My instincts were right. What I really wanted tell you is start a new Instagram.

That's the answer. That's what's gonna ha I mean, yeah. Uh, yeah, I'm just gonna say it start a new Instagram. Um, so you, you also make sub, you used to make subliminals and you started showcasing your dancing. I, yeah, I think there's too much going on. It's not specific enough. It's not targeted enough. So for me, like I was saying, I had my, my Roxi Lee heart, Instagram has like 40 K on it, but none of those people gave a fuck about manifesting.

They wanted to see me in my underwear cuz I was modeling. You know what I mean? Like they. They barely cared about what I was talking about barely. And it wasn't until, and same thing on, on YouTube. I put these kind of videos on my music, YouTube channel and my regular personal Instagram that I had been doing my modeling off of and music.

I put modeling and music on it. It did not work when I put Roxy talks on its own YouTube channel, which you're watching right now, because remember earlier I said, I'd been doing mindset Monday for four years. This channel's only been around for three. I was doing that shit on another YouTube channel for a year before I started this channel, the YouTube channel and the Instagram themselves starting them off on their own brand is 100%.

The reason you guys are sitting here right now watching me talk, there is no fucking way. We would still be doing all this and having it be the, where it is now, if I had not separated off into its own brand. So like, you're, you have too many different genres going on and you're building off of an old account of people that don't give a fuck about what you're doing.

So there's like two things going on that need that. That's why I say start a new one, get like, figure out what your new brand is gonna be and get really fucking clear on it. Start a new Instagram. Tar and target just those people. And then even on your feed, just follow people that are in the same kind of genre as you, because then as you're interacting, you're, you're interacting with people who are into the same shit.

Your, so your, uh, search, feed's gonna be tailored to that content. It's just gonna help everything feed in on each other. But.  bell says when I post myself being pretty its attention. When I dance, I get some support, but majority just ignore my content, even though it's amazing. And some of those people were transphobic.

Yeah, exactly. That's my point. I know that. I literally just told you this. I did the same fucking thing. Like you're asking my opinion. I'm telling you . Yeah. Like I had an account where I modeled and did music and the people didn't give a fuck about what I had to say. They just wanted to see me in my under.

Fine valid GRA I mean, who does it? I'm just kidding, but like really, they were not my target market. They were not. You guys, you guys, the ones who are searching for manifestation content are the people who wanted to hear that. Not the people who had been following me because I was a tattoo model. They don't give a fuck about my, my manifestation content.

I'd say like 1% of my following came over and that's being really generous. And almost none of them are people for my real life. Almost none. I could probably count on like my hands, how many people from my real life, like are even like, right. There's probably like two, three people in my real life in here right now in this chat that follow my stuff.

10, maybe like it's literally done a lot. So you don't, don't go to your regular, ask people for a fucking audience. Don't go to the wrong audience for, with the different content, like go to the right audience with the right content, if you wanna post, like, okay, you being pretty, it's fine for people that wanna look at you, you dancing.

If they don't care about dancing, they don't give a fuck people that like your dancing are gonna appreciate your dancing and you being pretty, you know what I mean? If you think about it. So, so. I believe is my advice to you would be to get clear on what your new brand is, and then start a whole new page and don't ask, don't even give a fuck.

If those people follow you. Like I care 0%. If the people that search out my tattoo or was following me on tattoos came over here. Not that I don't care, but it was like, that was never the point. It was never the point to get them to come over because people would always say, oh, once you have an audience, you can just.

Translate that to anything you can put anything in front of. 'em not in my case, that's not what I found. That is not what I found once I, uh, separated the two picked one to focus on and then provided a, an environment for that thing to thrive. That's when it thrived, but it did not thrive again. I was doing it on another channel for a year.

I was doing it for a year or before you guys ever, some people were there. Some people have been there from the beginning. For the most part, no one saw my shit because it wasn't being put out because I wasn't targeted. Right. You know? So there are people who have feeds of just dance. That's a real thing.

So those people are gonna love everything that you put out, that's dance related. They're gonna love anything that you put out that's like face related. And if you come out with like, I'm not that you have to be like, I'm a trans answer. I'm not saying you have to do that. But if like, if, if. If you are like, it's part of the, the package that you're presenting then.

I mean, obviously the people are gonna hate no matter what you, if you, and if you're putting yourself out in the internet, people, there's gonna be people that don't that disagree with what you're saying. And they're gonna let you know. I know that first hand it's it just happens. Right. But if it's like, this is a trans dance community post, like Paige that's who's coming, right.

Like. That's who you want. Right? Like, so what I'm trying to say is that, like, if you, if you start over coming straight out the gate with, this is what it is, trans dance, pretty bitch do deal with it, follow it or don't, I don't care, but this is what it is. And, and not like, look to. The people of your past for validation, the people that are even currently following you, like literally if none of 'em come over, who cares great best case scenario, because you want the people that want beautiful trans people and cool dance on their feed.

That's what you want. That's the people that are gonna show you the most love and then be your, your community. Right. Billions of people are gonna be funneled into the category of dance as being something that they're an interest of theirs. Right? If they're do you get what I'm mind? I'm saying it's like, there's so many people that are going to resonate with what you do once you get the shit in front of their eyes.

I am offering group programs. We're starting one tomorrow, actually. And it's all about inspired action and working with inspiration with the universe it's called taking massive action. Roxy talk.com/programs. If you wanna check that out also, we have our. Monthly subscription synergy, where you just get all of the stuff we do.

So if you're in synergy, you get the master trainings, you get the courses 360 S coming back, you'll get to be in three, the new 360 round. You literally get everything that we do just part of it. And we're actually gonna start doing fun events. Like I was talking about with Tiffany, um, the event Leann and I have like a bunch of different events that we are planning on doing in synergy like numerology night, astrology night.

Wine wine, like different, all kinds, all kinds of different stuff that we wanna bring into synergy for those who are on our monthly subscription package, so that stuff's coming through in, um, that's gonna be coming down the line in synergy. Synergy gets you access to everything. We do all the programs, all the master trainings.

You already get. All my courses when you sign up anyways, that's already in there and, um, oh yeah. Lean's synergy also includes a manifestation library. So we have a bunch of curated, like anything that you're looking for. Manifestation wise, we have like all of the clips, like down to the minute lean has 'em curated in there.

So we have a lot of stuff in there. Any, you have a private community, so synergies is great, but that's our, that's our monthly program when you're ready for long term commitment and you're not going anywhere. Synergy is definitely where it's at. And then on top of that, I will say, I'm gonna be opening up, um, for mini masterminds soon at the moment, they're probably gonna be.

More business related, like what I, with what I was talking with, Tiffany, anybody that's like a coach or an entrepreneur or, um, a business owner, or is looking to kind of like make it branch out on their own. That's the kind of content that I wanna start working more intimately with people. So I'm gonna bring back.

It's not gonna be one on one and it'll be small groups, but we're gonna bring it back in, um, like that more intense coaching with the ma the mini masterminds coming soon. Um, that's what's on the line coming up soon. Doesn't mean that's what it will always be. Um, but that's what we have coming soon.

How do you reconcile, manifesting slash LOA with dealing with grief and trauma two pregnancy losses over the past year? Sometimes the grief is just overwhelming. Yeah, I agree. Listen can, okay. It's like, okay. How do you reconcile, manifesting? With dealing with grief. It's like, it's like asking, like how do you reconcile the reconcile?

The fact that there's gravity, gravity, and air and oxygen on planet earth. What do you mean? The gravity keeps my feet stuck to the ground. The air is what I breathe. Neither really. I mean, as far, I don't know how much they have to do with each other, but for conversation purposes here, neither one really has anything to do with the other, the gravity.

Isn't the oxygen, the oxygen. Isn't, isn't the gravity. I'm not sitting here. Wondering why do I have to have gravity when I already have oxygen manifesting and grief and trauma are part of life, period. How do you reconcile it? You're a human being. That's it? That's what life.  there's ups and there's downs.

There's the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. That's what it is. So understand that just because you know about manifesting doesn't mean that you're you're you're and forgive me if I sound like I'm, I'm not trying to sound accusatory. It's just my tone in my voice. Sounds like this. Sometimes you're here.

Bad shit happens on earth. People die, people die, you are gonna die. I'm gonna die. Everybody here is gonna. Everybody here has experienced death of a loved one. I mean, hope. I mean, if you have it yet, enjoy it. Well, it lasts no offense. And I've always said to people, if you've, if you never experienced the death of a loved one or the loss of someone or something that you love it's cuz you're the one you're the first one to go.

So it's gonna happen, period. So is manifesting period. There's gonna be oxygen on planet earth and there's gonna be gravity. Okay. And you know, like, just because you can manifest again, does not mean that you're, you're not still susceptible to what the human body goes through and also understand that like, okay.

I suggest you listen to, um, I just mentioned it earlier. There's a new interview on Lewis house channel with Dr. Bruce Lipton. I really suggest you listen to this. He talks about how well, for one, obviously we know from like even Dr. Joe and stuff like your mind creates illness. I'm not saying that you chose this, so please don't take that the wrong way, but everything stems from the mind.

Okay. The body is a manifestation of the mind. Bruce Lifton says that we're only conscious, like not, uh, 5% of our day. That means 95% of your day. You're unconscious. And what happens when you're unconscious, you're running the autopilot's journey. Like I talked about earlier, you're running the programming that you got from your parents zero to seven.

That's what happens when you're not paying attention, you're playing out. You're on the treadmill that you are on ages zero to seven when you're not paying attention. And according to Dr. Bruce Lipton, you're not paying attention 95% of the time. So if your subconscious is programmed, To worried out fear to think that this is possible to like, even just thinking that ha it could happen is, is enough of a possibility for it to happen for you.

And like, I don't under, I don't know all the inner workings of how everything works together, but you can't out manifest the fact that organisms die on this planet. You know what I mean? Like we, there's nothing we can do about. At this stage in humanity. So the grief I'm sure. Overwhelming. You're I'm sure, like, I don't even have anything to say about that, except I bet.

You know, like, and with love, like I can't even imagine, but that is it's part of what planet earth is about. Right. And I, like I said, the only way you can escape feeling grief and trauma is if you're the first one to go and then everyone around you has to feel it. So. I don't know why it's part of life.

It just is. I've always said, I think it's the worst part of human of human life is the fact that we lose and we have to grieve, or we, that we do grieve. It's the hardest part about being a human is losing the, what you love. So how to reconcile. This is to be easy with yourself. If it's time to grieve, it's time to grieve.

and not beating yourself up or, or placing blame on yourself for what has happened in your body, because that is only gonna make it worse going forward. I don't know why that happened to you. Um, obviously I, you know, I don't know any of the story. I don't, I'm not sure what the deal is, but what I can say is.

I'm just, this is, I'm gonna tell you what it says it want. They, it wants to be loved those two losses. They want to be loved, not the, not the, not who you lost. The loss itself is asking you to love it. Love the loss. I don't know why this happened to you, but it's all leading you somewhere. Why it has to be that I don't know.

And I'm sorry that it has to be that for you. And I'm sorry that you have to experience this. But this isn't, doesn't have to be the end for you. And there is light. There is like, I'm seeing like a rainbow at the end of a tunnel as where it's like, it's like, I'm seeing like two analogies, like golden at the end of a rainbow and a light at the end of the tunnel are doing the same thing in my head at one time.

I just feel there's something on the other side of forgiveness for you that you don't, you can't see yet. Right? So let the grief be there when it's there and love yourself through it. Be there for yourself. Don't beat yourself up. You did nothing wrong. This, I don't wanna say this had to happen cause that's not what I mean.

I just mean that there's something on the other side of this that you can't see yet, because you're not, it's almost like if it was on the other side of the hill and you're just not. Far enough over the hill to see what's on the other side yet. But that doesn't mean that it's any less, not on the other side of the hill.

You know what I mean? Like, just because you haven't Crested the hill enough to see doesn't mean that it doesn't, it's not still just sitting there waiting for you. You need to make space in your heart for the loss. I don't know what that means. And that's what they're telling me. You need to make space in your heart for the loss.

That's what's gonna allow, whatever else is coming to come through. We're here for you, for sure. And, um, you know, if you wanted to join our private network, again, it's all about support being there for each other. This community that we have is so, so supportive and so powerful. And so we're just kind of. I basically built a house for us to live for the community to live.

So community dot, Roxy talks.com free to join. Um, you can even get an app so you can go straight into it, off your phone and not have to like go on the internet or like log in or whatever. Or I don't know. I haven't, I haven't downloaded the app yet.  we just, we just started doing it. Um, so, you know, come in and, and, and be supported if you, if you want that, if you need that, we have a really supportive family.

So. Um, anybody I suggest go and join community dot Roxy talks. Dot com is our brand new safe space for Roxy talk stuff and manifesting, and support and everything.

All right, everybody. I love you. I appreciate you do your homework. Your homework is to every day you're gonna write your goals down and then you're gonna write things that you're proud about yourself. So. There's no number. You don't have to do any number, but I'm just saying for, for easy purposes, five goals, five things I'm proud about.

Again, it can be any number below or above that you don't have to keep. It said fast. They don't have to be the same amount. It's just an easy five things here. Five things. They're fine. Whatever. Or just one in one, one in seven, two in five. It doesn't matter. Um, but goals, write your goals down. And then what am I proud about of myself?

And then you be that person. Okay. And you, you know, that, that stuff's coming. And if you're ready to join the community, community dot Roxy talks.com, where you can connect with everybody, all of our mindset Monday fam our, everyone that's here is gonna be there. That's joined up already. I love you all. I appreciate you.

Thanks for everyone for showing up and being here for yourself. Thanks for contributing. And, you know, Being a fucking cool person, man. We're all raising our vibrations together. You have the power I believe in you.