Boundaries are so important for allowing you to not only become your ideal self, but do it in the healthiest, most productive way while still maintaining beautiful relationships. So many of us are operating with really murky boundaries, while some of us don't have any at all. In this episode, I discuss HOW to create healthy boundaries in a sustainable way that actually FEELS good.
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Bring on these standards. They make my life better. It's a new standard for how I treat myself and how others treat me, and by extension, how I treat them. So as I raise my standards for how I treat me, I also raise my standards for how I treat others.
What is up? My fellow dreamers and Soul searchers? Welcome to the Roxy Talks manifestation podcast, your raw, unfiltered, and unapologetic source for all things manifestation related. I'm Roxy Lee, and for the last decade I have been researching and developing my signature 360 method, which combines behavioral science, quantum physics, and the law of attraction.
To help you manifest a life beyond your wildest dreams, visit roxy talks.com for more info. Now, let's get into it.
Today we're talking about boundaries. Boundaries are so important for allowing you to not only become your ideal, but do it in the healthiest, most productive way while still maintaining beautiful relationships. So many of us are operating with really murky ass boundaries. Like no offense, some don't even have any, right?
Some have very little. Some of us are really murky. Some of us are super low. We're allowing in way too much that we shouldn't, and it's causing us harm. It's affecting our relationships, it's affecting our self-esteem. It's affecting how we live our lives and go about creating abundance and happiness in our worlds.
So we're gonna talk about setting boundaries and most importantly, enforcing them because I find that. Usually where the issue comes in. Of course, having boundaries is very important, but do you enforce them? Because that's what really matters. A rule is only really a rule if it's enforced. Think about laws that people don't abide by all the time.
Actually, there's a bunch of fucked up laws in US history that we shouldn't abide by, thank God. So just think about it like that, that if you set a boundary in. Then there must be some sort of accountability for it. Because if the boundary is allowed to be crossed, then what's the fucking point? Why even have it there?
Why stress yourself even having the conversation. So the first part of communicating and setting boundaries is gonna be figuring out what it is that you no longer allow. What is your rule set? If we're talking relationships, what are people allowed and not allowed to do? Say and act like around you? What do you stand for?
What will you. Stand for. If you want others to abide by your boundaries, it's crucial that you know what they are first. So the first thing you're gonna wanna do is sit down and figure out what are my boundaries? What is my do not fucking Crossy line? What is your bottom rung? What is the lowest. Standard that you will accept.
And let's take it a step up, like how about this? Let's, what is your lowest standard? And then let's raise that a bitch. What is the lowest standard? And raise that bitch. Let's raise it a bit because I promise you it's way too fucking low. Even your lowest standard raise a bit is still too fucking low.
Let's. Start there. Okay. We don't wanna rock the boat too hard, okay? But you need to figure out what your standard is, what it is gonna be, what are the boundaries, where is the line? Figure that out. Then your job is not necessarily to communicate them right away. Not saying that you shouldn't of course communicate your boundaries, but there's a very important step in between that needs to be addressed, and that is that.
Need to become okay with your boundaries. You need to make them okay. You need to normalize them. You need to be so sold on them that it's not a question. And the thing is, is that you're already doing it. You already have boundaries and standards in place that you don't realize are there because it's your normal, it's your bandwidth of what you have decided you will allow as treatment for you on planet.
However that could be expanded, That can be changed. Just like any belief system, it can be adjusted and moved and worked on. So you're gonna decide now that what your standard is now, again, is no longer the minimum that's below bare minimum. We're raising the bar, we have a new bottom rung, and we are not gonna stand for X, Y, z blam No, no anymore.
Once you've done that again, now it's time. It feels good. I like setting this standard. I'm glad I put my foot down. It feels good to put my foot down. That boundary feels good. I like the way that sounds. That has a nice ring to it. I'm glad that people understand and respect the fact that these are my standards.
I'm glad that I set this standard for myself. This is a great standard to have. This is going to make me happy. I'm gonna thrive like this. I love the fact that I'm setting this standard for myself. I'm just making shit up. But what I'm not doing in those moments is being like, Ah, but what if? What if somebody, I don't know if, Yeah, but I don't wanna hurt anybody.
I don't want to make people mad. I don't want them to reject me cuz I did my standard, all that stuff, right? That's what I'm not doing and that's what's gonna help me rewrite this pattern in my mind and manifest a different reality where mother fuckers don't cross my goddamn boundaries. . Okay, . So I'm setting the environment up to allow myself to be okay with having standards so that when I do have to eventually enforce them, it's not so hard.
I'm not bridging this massive gap from, I don't deserve to have my needs met to, Oh fuck. Now I have to tell somebody They crossed the line. Yeah. A line I didn't even tell them was in place. Oh God, no. Nevermind. I'll just keep getting trampled on, right? No, no, no, no, no more. Hey, it's Roxy from the Future here.
Just stopping by to let you know about our Amazing Confidence Bootcamp live group program. I've never hosted a group program like this. Everyone that I do, I want to be different and special and unique so that anybody that's joining gets a fun, exciting, and transformative experience. And anybody that's coming back program after a program, or if you're in Synergy, of course, that's my monthly subscription that gets you access to all of my group programs.
I want it to feel special every time. So the Confidence Bootcamp that we are hosting for the month of October is gonna shake things up. We're doing it different. I'm pushing you out of your comfort. With love. There will be a net to catch you, but I wanna see you leap. I wanna see you make big commitments to yourself, and to your growth, and to your change.
And I'm gonna be there with you every step of the way, helping you build the confidence that you desire to achieve any reality you want. Sign up for the Confidence bootcamp@roxytalks.com. And in conjunction of course we're gonna be affirming that people are supportive of our new boundaries. They're supportive of our boundaries, period.
They're supportive of us having standards for ourselves. They're not angry, they're glad I said it. They're glad they know where the line is. Now they know where the line is. They don't have to worry about crossing it. Cause that's another thing is like sometimes people cross a line just cuz they don't fucking know there.
and we can't always be mad at somebody for crossing a line we didn't communicate to them existed, and we're feeling comfortable with it. We're becoming accustomed to the fact that there is a line, and we're okay with the fact that there's a line. We kind of like the fact that there's a line. The line protects us, the line keeps us safe, and the line keeps us in a place where we thrive.
Fuck yeah. Bring on these lines, Bring on these standards. They make my life. It's a new standard for how I treat myself and how others treat me, and by extension, how I treat them, because now that I know that I have these standards in place, what I'm not gonna do is treat you. Past my standard for how I treat myself and how I expect others to treat me because I'm an normal adult human being.
And I understand that. You get what you get, right? So as I raise my standards for how I treat me, I also raise my standards for how I treat others, and it makes my relationships better. And as I'm doing that, I'm also affirming, they're supportive, they're kind, they love it, they like my standards, and maybe they're inspired too, and they're setting their own standards, which is making their lives better.
So normalize the idea of having standards and boundaries. It's great to do it. I love my boundaries and standards, and I love the fact that the people around me respect them and get them and love me and appreciate me because of them. I want you to get into the idea that, I'm building something, I'm building a structure.
I'm building walls around me with love, not to keep people out, but to set the stage for what is allowed and what is not, so that I can continue experiencing the best this life has to offer. Now. If you are ready to dive into your own situation and get some help on what's going on in your world, manifests your ideal reality, head to roxy talks.com.
I have amazing programs and workshops you can get started on right away that will help you manifest anything in your ideal reality. We've also got an amazing supportive place for all of our manifestors to gather community dot roxy talks.com, and check me out on social media, podcasts, iTunes, Spotify, and more.
I'm kind of all over the place. I'm here for you. I love you. I appreciate you. We're all raising our vibrations together. You have the power. I believe in you.