Bravehearts Rising
Bravehearts Rising
Episode #40 - I'm Back + Notes on Navigating Transitions
Being human can be tough. Remember, you're doing your best!
Mentioned on the episode:
- Your Year Ahead with Jessica Lanyadoo - Tarot for the Wild Soul
- My Nourishing Notes Newsletter - Lisa Love direct to your inbox
As always, any feedback welcome to lisa@braveheartsrising.com
Hello and welcome to the Bravehearts Rising podcast. I'm your host Lisa Pascoe. If you're new here, welcome. And for my longer term listeners, I'm back. It's been more than a year. It has been a very strange, intense year, of which I'm sure I'll talk more about in future episodes. But for today, I wanted to just bring back this energy. I've really missed having these conversations with you with my guests, and now feels like the perfect time to come back. These aren't easiest of episodes to record, because where do you begin when it's been so long? But yeah, I'm gonna go with the principle that I follow. And I'm sure most of you do, too. And that is imperfect action for the win, and just be imperfectly perfect. Because I think so often, when we're perfectionists and we get into that headspace, we stop ourselves from kind of being in the world, the way that we want to be in the world, we we kind of minimise our impact in the world. And that is not what we're about here at Bravehearts Rising. So I am diving in imperfectly, and saying hello to all of you.
You may be wondering why now? Why bring back Bravehearts at this point in time? Honestly, I don't think any of us have really recovered since 2020, most of us are still exhausted and things only feel more and more intense. And bravehearts is all about that intersection between well being and having an impact. Because in order to have an impact, we have to have kind of the resources, the where with all the community like community is so important. And for me, brave hearts rising is so much more than a podcast. It's actually an idea that my wife and I came up with back in 2015, way before the podcast, I've always had this vision of a community and a space where people can connect and share resources and knowledge. I don't know how I'm bringing that into fruition yet or how that will come into fruition. But I do know that the podcast is a great starting point for conversations and for reminding each other that we're not alone, for inspiring each other. And remembering that like your ripple effects really matters. Because sometimes things can feel hard when we're reading headline after headline around transphobia, racism, homophobia, ableism. So many things happening in the world that really feel heart, like they impact your mental health. And I've always said, you know, you can drink for the green smoothies you like you can do all the meditation, the yoga, all the things. But if the minute you step out your front door, you're faced with oppressive systems, like that has an impact. We know this. And so it was really important for me to start these conversations again, it's just as important for me as I hope it is for you the listeners, because I am tired, but I feel hopeful. And I feel hopeful because of the people I see around me who want to speak out who want to make a difference, who want to connect, who want to create beautiful things, you want to talk from the heart, like being human is so messy and weird. But it can also be beautiful, and magical.
And so I'm here, basically, and this year for me is feels like a turning point. I'm turning 40 in March. So that feels like a whole fresh chapter for me. And also a transition, because you'll move on moving from one decade to another I really clearly remember turning 30 I remember all the things that I wanted to shift around myself and the different ways that I wanted to be in the world and I have learned a lot and so now it's interesting thinking forwards between 40 and 50. Like for me personally like what do I want to learn about myself? What do I want to do differently? What am I so ready to leave behind? Hello comparison and self doubt? Yeah, I'm finding I'm also coming out of a cocoon phase. My mum was diagnosed with cancer last June and that was really tough, tougher than I probably have processed yet and that's okay. Thankfully, she has two more treatments left and then touch all the wood. It will be a case of just recovering and going back to work and so it feels like some space Since lifting in my life, where I can find me think about other things other than, you know, my mom's health, we've been renovating the house, and that has taken up in an ordinate amount of energy as well. But finally, I feel like there is some space. And so I am here and we have a beautiful new moon in Aquarius on Saturday. So I'm really feeling that new energy feeling right now. So thank you for listening to that long intro. But it felt like after a year, I should, not should it felt like after a year, I wanted to, yeah, give some context about why I'm back. So thank you.
As I said, My mood is tired yet hopeful. And yeah, I'm really looking forward to connecting with more inspiring, awesome humans in the world this year. So what's the purpose of this episode other than to say hello to you all? I thought I would talk a little bit about transition, and give you a few reminders, if you too are going through a transition in your life. I listened to a Tarot For the Wild Soul podcast episode recently, which I will link to in the show notes. And it was interesting though, because they were talking about the difference between seeing something as a fresh chapter and a transition. And I'm sharing this with you because it's just an interesting way of thinking about it, but I hadn't thought about it. And I personally think both can be really helpful. And also, I can see why it doesn't work for some in so much as like when you think about like a fresh chapter or a blank page that can be really overwhelming. Like, what are you going to do with it? What goes in it, like sometimes things are unknown. And that's okay, but it can feel a bit scary, right? Like, you're like, Oh, my goodness, what is going to happen? I have no idea. It's very much where I'm at right now I'm in this very liminal space where I don't know what's happening. Next, I'm in between all the things at the moment it feels. So that can be overwhelming. But it can also be like really exciting. Like, I love nothing more than like an empty room and thinking about all the potential and you know, the potential opportunities, and I think it was probably the Pisces in me. And also, I think that word transition is important in so much as it. And also, I think the word transition is also important. And thinking about things as transitions can be really important. Because there needs to be then some kind of acknowledgement, and potentially, like a ritual around what was and what potentially will be. And all of those things I talked about, like, what are you letting go in this transition? Like, what are you bringing into this new chapter and through that the transition, so I feel like the two really complimentary things. What I really found useful in that episode now I'm just recalling is that they asked the question, how would I approach this differently if I saw it as a transition rather than a fresh beginning? And I thought that was an interesting question. And it's one I'm sharing with you.
So if you are going through your own transition via a breakup, divorce, a big birthday, a new job being made redundant, or any of these types of big life things. I want to share kind of four reminders with you. So firstly, it's okay, if you don't have all the answers. So often, I've worked with people and they're like, I can't believe I still don't know this or I can't believe I haven't worked this out by now. And so I want to say to you, it's okay, if you haven't worked it out by now, you're not supposed to know everything.
Being human is tough at times. And so please, please, please, this is number two. Be gentle with yourself. If you've been listening for a while, that won't come as any surprise but it's so easy for us to slip into a self criticism. Pull yourself together mode, because, hey, capitalism, productivity is value. So all that time we spend kind of in our emotions is time wasted. And also because it's very uncomfortable to be with our feelings at times, so we do like to go into fix it mode with ourselves sometimes or we'll go into avoidance. I'm guilty of it, I'm sure you'll have been guilty of it. Sometimes at times. It's one of those things. Again, it's human to want to not have to deal with stuff sometimes because it's tiring. And I want to tell you, that's okay. And you don't need my permission. But sometimes it helps, doesn't it? I found that people often like a little bit of permission, and it can just take a real weight off your shoulders going, Okay, no, she's right. She's right. It's okay, that I don't have all the answers. So a question I will put to you, and maybe it's one for journaling on is, how can I be more gentle with myself through this transition, or in this moment, because we know deep down how we can do things differently. But when we're on automatic pilot, we can just go into old old patterns, and they aren't always the healthiest or the kindness patterns at times. So if you are struggling, to be gentle, have a think about what are some small things that you can do. And often it can be the your thoughts, at the most basic level, start noticing what you're saying to yourself in your head. And think of a reframe, or think of something that you can say or as an alternative. So rather than, Oh, why don't I already know this, or I'm so X, whatever that happens to be think, you know, I'm only human, and I'm doing my best on whatever your equivalent is like using your own words is always the most powerful thing to do, rather than using what someone else tells you to do. So have a think about that.
Which leads nicely on to my next one, which is all of your feelings, and all of your emotions are 100% valid. So if you are feeling pissed off with yourself, or you're sad, or you're angry at the world, it's okay. I think the most important thing is that connection that you have with yourself and your self awareness around how those emotions are showing up in your day to day. Because what can often happen, and what I've seen is that emotions can come out sideways. So something might have happened in one area of your life, but the emotions are appearing somewhere else. And it's only when you take that moment to check in with yourself or maybe a threat friend is reflecting back to you or just making an observation and you'd like all okay. So what's actually going on here is I'm actually really sad about that thing that just happened, but I'm actually having an issue work instead, for example, very simplistic. And so I invite you to think about your emotions. And ask yourself, How are my emotions showing up in my life right now? Are there any emotions are getting more attention than other emotions? And this may sound strange, but I would also invite you to think about how you can bring some playful energy into this space as well, particularly if things are feeling difficult. Because that can be really helpful. I always remember seeing an image on I always remember seeing an image on Instagram, that is by someone called Britchida B-R-I-T-C-H-I-D-A and they had created something that basically said, play is the opposite of survival. And that really resonated with me and it was something that came up for me in therapy when I was so focused. There's part of me that was hurting a lot. And I was always trying to figure out how to make that part of me safe. And what I realised this that really she just wanted to have fun and play. And once I realised that that was a real game changer for me. So like everything that I do and all of my workshops on my work, I always say like take what resonates and leave the rest.
And this leads me on to my final reminder, and that is you are not alone and you do not have to do this alone. If things if your emotions are feeling too much right now too intense, reach out to a friend if you're finding things difficult or if you simply need a sounding board to talk things through often, we it can be so, so helpful. When we simply speak things out, it helps us process. So I often leave voice notes for one of my best friends, for example, and it just really helps me work through stuff. So reach out to someone. Often, they'll also be self referral services locally for therapy and counselling support. So if that's something that you need, look into that. And of course, there are things like coaching that can also really help if that's a better fit for you. I think, you know, the whole conversation around therapy versus coaching is a big one. And it's one I will tackle on another episode. But I have certainly worked with people who have been facing the birthdays, people who have been going through the menopause, people who have been changing job industries, people who've gone through bereavements. So, transition is one of those areas that I love to help people through.
And then finally, and this is something because it has kind of just come to me as I've been talking, is that there are also lots of really awesome creative things that you can do when you're going through a transition. So there are things like tarot, and the Tarot for the Wild Soul podcast is really great. If you're looking for someone who is anti capitalist and trauma informed and aware of oppressive systems, Lindsay Mack is amazing. So Tarot for the Wild Soul is great. Tarot can really help you work through metaphors in your life and make sense of things in a different more creative way. And there are things like journaling that can really help every month, I send out prompts in my nourishing notes, which you can sign up for in the link in the show notes. And also, I'll do monthly prompts on Instagram and LinkedIn. And, yeah, there are lots of journaling prompts out there that you can find, and they can really help you through transition, thinking about things like who am I becoming? What have I learned over the last 10 years, six months? What have I learned through this challenging situation? What am I taking forward with me? All of those great questions, I get really excited about asking questions, which is why I make a great coach. And while I've writing prompts, and why I love having conversations with people, it all comes down to asking questions and gaining insights and transformation, because that's what really excites me. And that's where the magic is for me.
And finally, finally, please know that you are doing your best. And that's all that you can do. I think that is a wrap for me for today. Thank you so much for listening. It has been really interesting. Coming back to the podcast, I going forward, I absolutely won't be doing seasons because it's exhausting. And I want to take a much more natural, cyclical approach for me as in working with my energy levels with my capacity going forward, because that's what makes it sustainable. And enjoyable. For me. That means this this is episode 40. Probably should have said that at the beginning, but hey, we went with imperfect perfect, right or perfectly imperfect. I don't see the irony in me getting that wrong.
Okay. Anywho. So this is Episode 40, which feels really good. And I will be making more of these episodes in the coming months. And I would love to know what would you like to hear me talk about what topics would you love to get some Lisa love on some insights on? And are there any guests that you'd like to see on the podcast as well? Please, please, please do email me at lisapascoe.com I'd love to hear from you. So thank you so much for listening. I really, really appreciate your time let's together support each other to be nourished and grounded on well and to have a greater impact because your ripple effect really matters. Okay, take care lots of love. Bye bye