Of Power Tools and Penises: A Cautionary Tale From the ER Told by Dr. Mistry and Dr. Jacomides

Thanks for tuning in to the Armor Men’s Health Hour Podcast today, where we bring you the latest and greatest in urology care and the best urology humor out there.

In this segment, Dr. Mistry and Donna Lee are joined by NAU Urology Specialist's own Dr. Lucas Jacomides, who helps Dr. Mistry recount a harrowing and humorous tale about the use of penile rings. While the professional term for these devices is an "erectile occlusive ring," many people refer to colloquially as "rooster rings" or "c*ock rings." Because they are used to stop blood flow from leaving the penis and thus prolong erections, occlusive rings can have great benefits when properly used, particularly for men suffering from ED. However--and this is a BIG however, as today's segment will make clear--when people use the wrong occlusive rings or use them improperly, they can become stuck on the penis with sometimes tragic results. The man in the story Dr. Jacomides and Dr. Mistry tell today nearly lost the use of his penis (or potentially the entire penis itself) because a titanium occlusive ring became stuck on his penis for 5 days. The ring ultimately had to be removed with the use of a Midas Rex drill, the same medical drill brain surgeons use to saw through the skull. The moral of this story is that while penile rings can be fun, anything you put on or near your penis should be well researched before use to prevent disaster. Dr. Mistry recommends plastic penis rings that have a latch for safe removal. Importantly, if you do get an item stuck on or in your penis, please go to the Emergency Room and they can contact a urology specialist to come in and remove it safely for you. 

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Dr. Mistry is a board-certified urologist and has been treating patients in the Austin and Greater Williamson County area since he started his private practice in 2007.

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Transcript

Speaker 1 0:09

Welcome back to the Armor Men's Health Hour with Dr. Mistry and Donna Lee.

Dr. Mistry 0:15

Welcome to the Armor Men's Health Hour. I'm Dr. Mistry, your host, here as always with my cohost, the wealth coiffed and always giggly, Donna Lee.

Donna Lee 0:26

That's right, I got a new haircut and I'm giggling, So. Thus, the description.

Dr. Mistry 0:30

Well, that's nice because they think you're the star of the show.

Donna Lee 0:34

I am the star of the show.

Dr. Mistry 0:34

Well...

Donna Lee 0:34

You forget, because I can do every show without you.

Dr. Mistry 0:36

That's right.

Donna Lee 0:37

Sometimes I have Dr. Jacomides on without you.

Dr. Mistry 0:39

That's right. I don't understand what's going on here.

Dr. Jacomides 0:42

It's my coiffe.

Dr. Mistry 0:42

It's your coiffe.

Donna Lee 0:45

That's right. It's job security on my part.

Dr. Mistry 0:46

This is a men's health show. I'm a board certified urologist. And this show is brought to you by the urology practice started in 2007, right here in Round Rock, Texas, and now all over Austin: NAU Urology Specialist.

Donna Lee 1:00

That stands for North Austin Urology.

Dr. Mistry 1:02

Not anymore. Right? It's NAU. Just like KFC does not stand for Kentucky fried chicken anymore. It's just KFC.

Donna Lee 1:08

It's just KFC? Is Kentucky fried chicken racist?

Dr. Mistry 1:10

It's branding.

Donna Lee 1:11

I feel like it's going to go away because of the little white guy on the bucket.

Dr. Mistry 1:15

Really? Oh my lord.

Donna Lee 1:15

Yeah. That's what I think. I don't know.

Dr. Jacomides 1:16

I thought you were making an anti-Kentucky statement.

Donna Lee 1:16

They're canceling everything. No, I love KFC, but they're canceling everything. Dr. Seuss got canceled, Mr. Potato Head.

Dr. Mistry 1:22

We are not talking about this on the radio, do you understand?

Donna Lee 1:25

OK, go ahead. Mr. Potato Head lives in my heart.

Dr. Mistry 1:25

They're going to turn us off on the radio.

Donna Lee 1:28

He will always be a he.

Dr. Mistry 1:30

So...It depends on which one of the little plastic parts you put on, sometimes.

Donna Lee 1:34

That's true.

Dr. Jacomides 1:35

What a great segue for what we need to talk.

Dr. Mistry 1:41

So Donna, this is a men's health show, but we are a urology specialty clinic. Why don't you tell people where we are and how to get a hold of us?

Donna Lee 1:48

That's right. You can like Dr. Mistry said, we're in Round Rock. We're also in North Austin, South Austin and Dripping Springs, Texas. I recently heard that we are just like Hays county is the biggest, fastest growing county in the country and that Rollingwood, Texas by Westlake is the number on, most family-friendly place to live in the entire country.

Dr. Mistry 2:06

That's right.

Donna Lee 2:06

I heard that on the news.

Dr. Mistry 2:07

Because I guess everybody there gets a BMW when you graduate or when you're 16. It's so friendly. It's so friendly.

Donna Lee 2:13

Graduate Westlake High School and you get a BMW. You can reach out to us by calling us during the week at(512) 238-0762. Our website is armormenshealth.com, where you can see Dr. Jacomides' and Dr. Mistry's handsome, smiling faces. And you can send your questions anonymously. We will answer them on the radio at armormenshealth@gmail.com. Please send us your questions, but today we have a funny story to share with the listeners.

Dr. Mistry 2:36

That's right. So Dr. Jacomides, thanks a lot for joining us today, Lucas.

Dr. Jacomides 2:39

Oh, it is always my pleasure. We are at the greatest place to be in urology in all of Austin is what those same magazines also said. So yeah.

Donna Lee 2:49

That's right. The best place to be in urology in Austin. Hey, I want to mention that on Facebook, there's a very cryptic posting that you made Dr. Jacomides that said something about a story that involved, and there was no real definition of what the story was, and then your response, Dr. Mistry was hysterical. So I think we should totally talk about that.

Dr. Mistry 3:05

Well, I think that, you know, people ask me all the time why I became a urologist. And I say, it's because of the jokes. But what I, what really prompted me is how diverse and exciting and interesting of a field that we're in. And we always have some kind of interesting story or something that happened to people. And now I get to add that we also get to use power tools.

Dr. Jacomides 3:26

Yes. There has to be some prefacing here.

Donna Lee 3:29

There's a penis involved, isn't there?

Dr. Jacomides 3:30

There is. And I think for purposes of not getting this entire segment bleeped, I will refer to this, implement that this gentleman decided to use as something that he used on something that rhymes with the clock, but we'll just call it the rooster ring. Okay. Because I, I think that's just, just to kind of a segment of what, what happens when you put your rooster ring on.

Dr. Mistry 3:50

This is a medical show. This is called a penile or erectile occlusive ring.

Dr. Jacomides 3:56

Okay. That's a lot to say. I like rooster.

Donna Lee 3:58

Occlusive?

Dr. Mistry 4:00

Occlusive.

Donna Lee 4:00

That's too big of a word for the penis.

Dr. Mistry 4:02

Especially sometimes it means dental or something. Anyway, so I get a call on a Sunday night from you to tell me that a poor gentlemen who has used one of these occlusive rings, had it got stuck on him for five days.

Dr. Jacomides 4:15

Five days. I think, just to say one thing that you and I am sure have seen is that the powerful pathology of male of men that say number one, either a I'm going to put this in my urethra, or I'm going to put my entire penis through this, whatever that element is. And so I'm sure you've taken things out of people's bladders all the time when they get stuck.

Dr. Mistry 4:38

For sure. Crayons.

Dr. Jacomides 4:39

Crayons.

Donna Lee 4:41

Glass rocks.

Dr. Mistry 4:41

Glass rocks.

Dr. Jacomides 4:41

Caulking was one that was really horrible that I took out once. Someone put tackle, like worm bait, also.

Dr. Mistry 4:48

You took a crochet needle out of one?

Dr. Jacomides 4:49

I took a crochet need a lot of a woman. Yeah.

Donna Lee 4:51

We had a patient use the Elmer glue into his urethra.

Dr. Mistry 4:54

That's all very interesting,

Dr. Jacomides 4:56

All horrible. But then there's the people that decide to make love to something and then can't get it off of them.

Donna Lee 5:02

The occlusion device.

Dr. Jacomides 5:03

The occlusion device.

Dr. Mistry 5:04

The occlusion device.

Donna Lee 5:06

Not the woman.

Dr. Mistry 5:06

Now, as a general rule in our practice, we use these types of occlusive devices very frequently. And they're usually made of plastic or have a latch to take it off the penis so that they don't get stuck. And we also encourage so men who can get like an erection, but then lose it quickly--we love the occlusive device because it's non-medication, you just buy at one time. They're fun to buy, you can buy them in a variety of colors. You know? Something the whole family can enjoy.

Dr. Jacomides 5:31

Correct. Not the whole family.

Donna Lee 5:32

Not the whole family.

Dr. Mistry 5:32

Oh, just the wife. Just the wife.

Donna Lee 5:34

Just the husband and wife.

Dr. Mistry 5:35

Just the husband and wife.

Dr. Jacomides 5:35

Or whatever makes you happy. But yes, the important element there is you get in, you get out like a Navy seal. You do not stick on there for five days. You got to take it off.

Dr. Mistry 5:44

So this particular patient, not only used a titanium, titanium ring, but left it on there for five days. And so for the listeners. So you understand when you put something like that around there and you see the blood get out of there, so it can actually kill the skin and even kill a lot of the penis.

Donna Lee 6:01

Could you lose the penis?

Dr. Mistry 6:01

You sure could.

Donna Lee 6:05

Oh, oh! This story got so tragic!

Dr. Jacomides 6:05

And certainly we consented him accordingly that it could happen or losing erections permanently. Because again, this is the world's biggest nightmare. It's not the four hour erection. This is the 120 hour erection because you've had it for 24 times 5, like that quick math.

Donna Lee 6:19

I bet his wife was so happy.

Dr. Jacomides 6:20

Oh my God. I guess she was happy until about day four and then said, OK...

Dr. Mistry 6:24

"Okay, maybe, maybe we should get this thing off."

Dr. Jacomides 6:26

"Maybe, it's Saturday night. No, it's Sunday. Now it's time to give it a rest."

Dr. Mistry 6:30

So taking a titanium ring off is not like you take a pair of pliers or a wire cutters or scissors. We're going to have to take out some power tools.

Dr. Jacomides 6:41

We did. And, you know, we had to research where to do it. First of all, I don't even wear a wedding ring because I can't stand the thought of it getting stuck on my finger for more than five seconds, even though I'm happily married to my lovely wife, Jenny. But I do wear my penile ring constantly, but the point is...

Donna Lee 6:55

On his finger.

Dr. Jacomides 6:55

On my finger, yes.

Dr. Mistry 6:56

It's the same size.

Dr. Jacomides 6:56

It's the same. That's so hurtful. But the point is we researched and found something called the Midas Rex drill that is used to cut into skulls when neurosurgeons do surgery. And so only we sent him down to a different hospital and we used about five or six drill bits, I think, you know, to get through this thing. But it took every bit of 15 minutes. And then we had to also very carefully protect somehow we were able to, by the grace of God, we're able to slide something between this ring and between this, this poor swollen penis, because that thing has a kick, Donna. Man, that thing is like trying to get a jackhammer, you know? And so you got to be perfectly still, or you will finish the job that almost got done, you know?

Donna Lee 7:41

Oh my God.

Dr. Mistry 7:41

It's a fascinating story of, um, of how, uh, you know, when you're a physician and you are confronted with less kind of common problems, you really have to have a little more of an engineering mindset. And we're very fortunate in this town to have an exceptional, exceptional hospital services. South Austin Medical Center, St. David's South Austin Medical Center was just top notch when it came to getting us the right equipment and getting us done. And you know, another part of the story was that I was so excited...

Donna Lee 8:12

Oh lord.

Dr. Mistry 8:12

...to drive down.

Dr. Jacomides 8:13

This is the best part of the story.

Donna Lee 8:13

This is the good part.

Dr. Mistry 8:13

I was so excited drive down to help take care of this patient, that Lucas and I were in a car--a sporty car I might add--zipping down, and I ran out of gas.

Dr. Jacomides 8:25

Yes. And, and, and we're, and we have got to get this poor man...not only ran out of gas, ran out of gas on the express lanes of Mopac.

Dr. Mistry 8:33

I'm a 45 year old physician and I ran out of gas on the, on the freeway.

Donna Lee 8:37

That is embarrassing.

Dr. Mistry 8:37

So the police came...

Donna Lee 8:38

...to protect you from getting slammed.

Dr. Mistry 8:41

And when they heard, when they heard what we were going to go take care of, they immediately transported Dr. Jacomides...

Donna Lee 8:48

In the back of the car.

Dr. Jacomides 8:49

In the back of a squad car.

Dr. Mistry 8:50

In the back of a squad car.

Dr. Jacomides 8:51

So, I thought it was fantastic to go from sporty car to in a back of a squad car. And I've been torturing everybody on Facebook to say,"Did you get pulled over? Did you do, did you street race? Did you steal the car?" I'm like, these are all great, wonderful theories, but this... Running out of gas is not, not the best punch line.

Donna Lee 9:10

Somebody on that[inaudible], one of your friends said, "If there's no pictures, there's no proof." So that's funny. Now you have proof.

Dr. Jacomides 9:13

So I will add one thing that line of the night that, first of all, thank you, officer Ramon for taking me down there cause that's saved this poor man a little bit of extra time. But, I will say this: that Susie, the scrub tech over there at South Austin Medical Center had the line of the night. She's like, you know, she's just like,"Why, why do people do this?" Like,"Well, you know, some people, you know, drive really nice sporty cars and some people need a rooster ring." And, and she goes,"Yeah, but you know that that sport car's a lot easier to get out of. I thought that was great.

Donna Lee 9:45

That's funny. That's a good point.

Dr. Mistry 9:46

Well, thank you so much for joining us today, Lucas. To our listeners, I'm sorry if you were offended by any of that, but really...

Dr. Jacomides 9:51

I was[inaudible] by the chicken. That was offensive. No.

Donna Lee 9:53

You can say c*ck ring. We can say that.

Dr. Jacomides 9:56

We can? Excellent.

Donna Lee 9:56

We can say it now.

Dr. Mistry 9:56

So Donna, how do people get ahold of us and how do people share their own urologic stories that, you know, it's like that show"Sex Sent Me To the ER," that's exactly what happened to his guy.

Donna Lee 10:08

That's right. We're going to say"sex sent you to the podcast." You can reach out through us through armormenshealth.com. That's our website. You can send an inquiry or you can just email us at armormenshealth@gmail.com. I will respond to you and let you know when you can listen to the show or I'll just send you the podcast. Our phone number is(512) 238-0762. And thank you guys so much for that amazingly entertaining story.

Dr. Jacomides 10:30

Oh, it was fantastic. It was my pleasure.

10:32

The Armor Men's Health Hour is brought to you by Urology Specialists. For questions, or to schedule an appointment, please call(512) 238-0762 or online at armormenshealth.com.