#402: Be The Hammer 🔨 - Not the nail.

“Be the hammer, not the nail” sounds like a slogan until you’ve got someone’s weight across your chest and you have to figure out a way out. That quick jiu jitsu moment is the spark for a bigger conversation about mindset, resilience, and what it really takes to move forward when life feels heavy. I share how a simple reversal on the mat becomes a reminder that progress almost always starts with action, not wishing, not waiting, and definitely not freezing. 

We dig into the uncomfortable truth behind self improvement: nobody becomes great without losing first. Being second place, getting outworked, or realizing you’re not there yet can either crush you or sharpen you. I also talk about using clear metrics to improve, whether that’s in training, fitness, or creative work like stand-up comedy. Growth is easier to chase when you can measure it, and it’s more sustainable when you focus on being better than yesterday instead of comparing yourself to everyone else. 

Then we get practical about time management and productivity. You don’t “find time,” you create time by cutting waste and, if needed, starting your day earlier. Life isn’t just work and sleep, it’s a full mix of physical health, mental health, emotional balance, relationships, and ambition. If you want to protect what matters and become harder to break under pressure, jiu jitsu is one of the clearest teachers I know. 

If this hits home, subscribe, share the episode with a friend, and leave a quick review. What’s one area of your life where you need to stop being the nail and start making a move?

Transcript

Be The Hammer Mindset

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Be the hammer, not the nail. You know, one of the things that I love about jujitsu is it is a metaphor for everything in life, essentially.

A Jiu Jitsu Pin Sparks A Lesson

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Uh the other day, uh in context, if you don't train jujitsu, it sounds pretty mean, but it wasn't a big deal. The other day, a guy had his knee across my chest and uh he was putting all of his weight into it, and he was the hammer, and I didn't want to be the nail. So uh I reversed the position and uh I got out of there. But that that small moment made me think, you know what, I'm gonna make a podcast out of this just because again, jujitsu is life, it's a metaphor.

Movement Under Pressure In Life

SPEAKER_00 0:42

And um I feel like a lot of times when you're in a hard situation, you you have to move. You have to move no matter what you are, if it's emotional or physical in that circumstance or psychologically or anything like that to be able to move up in life, you know, because otherwise you're just gonna continue to be number two. And nobody, nobody that was ever a gold medalist didn't ever lose something. They didn't ever uh lose and were second place at something, which made them want to be first. Okay. I mean, I'm saying it didn't ever happen with an almost extreme certainty, right? Because generally speaking, when you're learning how to do something and you're working to be better than yourself, I mean you're always gonna be second or or less than that, right? But even when it comes to being better than you, even if you're first, how do you improve yourself if you're already the best at something? Ask yourself that question. I think about that all the time because I'm not the best, but I always want to improve my own everything, my own exercises and the amount that I lift, uh, judo, jujitsu, everything, everything. And of course, stand-up comedy, right? I have metrics that I do where I have I want to have a certain amount of laughs per minute. Okay. And then if possible, if I can get even in even more than that, that's even better, right? So um, yeah, I was just I was just thinking about that because it was so relevant and so um it really just hit the spot with a lot of things that were going on between uh just life itself, you know, your work schedule, your balance schedule, your uh exercise, if you do that, making time, creating

Create Time By Cutting Waste

SPEAKER_00 2:30

time. You know, nobody understands how I always tell everybody you need to create time. Well, it doesn't really mean you make you make it with like a machine. It just means that you cut out waste of your day, and if you've already done that, your next step is to get up earlier. You have to start your day earlier to get what you want, to get what you need into your life. Because your life, it isn't just a matter of going to work and coming home, okay? Your whole life should be like a Rubik's Cube of uh emotions and goals and objectives. And on one side, the way that your your loved ones look at you, okay, is a completely different way than your boss might look at you, than your coworker might look at you, but also that's on the outside looking in. On the inside looking out, you have to have different viewpoints, okay? You gotta have your personal ambitions, you gotta have your physical health, you gotta have your uh emotional health, your mental health, okay? You gotta do all of these things, but you need time to do it, right? So if you cut out waste in your day and you start your morning earlier, you will be creating time. You as I call it, making time, right? You gotta you gotta get these things done. These aren't a maybe, these are the only things that that matter the most, right? And whenever you start to get behind in life, maybe it's somebody that's doing it to you in life, or it's something, or it could be a physical weight uh or an obstacle or something like that. You gotta stop living is the nail, and you gotta become the hammer. Coming around full swing, no pun intended, right? If you're gonna be in a bad spot in life, you have the choice to be the one that's getting the pressure received or giving the pressure to uh to be number two or be number one. And in that moment, I said not today. And I I got out and I did a reversal, and uh, and then I the situation changed.

Why Jiu Jitsu Builds Real Confidence

SPEAKER_00 4:40

But again, if you wanna if you want to learn more about yourself, humble opinion, train jujitsu. If you want to learn more about um how to relax under pressure, train jujitsu. If you want to learn how to defend yourself, train jiu jitsu. If you want to learn how to protect your loved ones, train jiu jitsu, okay? I know guys that have lost over a hundred pounds doing it, and they're essentially killers now, okay? Because they're also doing something that's not just lifting weights above your head counting to 10. And I'm not putting down, I'm not saying anything bad against exercising, but you're not ever gonna walk into a gym and have a piece of equipment attack you. All right, and almost always, almost always, you probably don't have to you what's interesting about jujitsu, not going on a sidebar too much, right, is if a object is heavier and it's on you, if an object is heavier and it's on you, almost always you don't have to push it off of you. As long as you know how to do certain uh framing and taint changing your body and using your hips and stuff, you could usually almost always, I would say, if not always, get out without even using any of your uh pushing strength, you know. But anyway, I'm digressing a little bit.

Final Reminder And Sign Off

SPEAKER_00 6:10

I hope everybody has a beautiful day. Be the hammer, don't be the nail, and as always, if something that I said helps you in a point in your life, that's great. But at the very least, and as a bonus, this is always a mental note for me of what I gotta do, where I gotta go, where I'm coming from, and where I'm trying to get at. This has been well done. Check me out. Peace.