Ain't No Such Thing - Original Southern Horror Stories
Do you like a good scary story? Us, too! You're gonna feel right at home with us here at Ain't No Such Thing, our horror podcast. Each week, we explore the ghosts, haunts, monsters, and more urban & rural legends from across the world and across cultures, and we tell our own, original horror stories based on those legends! Our stories are narrated in Southern style by illustrator and comic artist Amanda Rachels and are accompanied by episodes including commentary and analysis by Amanda, host Jessica Hinds, and writer Kevin LaPorte.
Episodes
50 episodes
LEGEND: The Coosa River Monster - Dragon, Woman or Gar?
Consider the strange and varied circumstances of the 19th Century legend of the Coosa River Monster, a uniquely northeastern Alabama occurrence that was never quite what it appeared...and it appeared many times over those long-lost decades to b...
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Season 3
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Episode 6
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46:30
HORROR MOVIE REVIEW: Glorious
Join the Ain't No Such Thing crew as we discuss Rebekah McKendry's recent indie horror, Glorious, streaming now on Shudder. All four of us sat down to watch this homegrown Lovecraftian tale, and we shared some s...
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Season 3
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Episode 5
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13:24
SCARY STORY: The Baptist IV - The Bay of the Holy Spirit
Two friends on an annual alligator hunt discover hidden truths about each other and encounter a legendary gator and a supernatural force they could not have foreseen and might possibly not survive.Join our Facebook group for exclusive i...
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Season 3
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Episode 4
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22:40
LEGEND: The Melon Heads - Scourges of the Northern Woods
Join the Ain't No Such Thing crew for a dreaded foray outside the South in consideration of a decidedly Northern phenomenon - The Melon Heads, cannibalistic survivors of a mad doctor's machinations in a mid-20th century asylum, escaped...
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Season 3
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Episode 3
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51:27
SCARY STORY: Bitten - An Infectious Body Horror
A simple man tending his orange grove suffers an unexpected bite from a seemingly normal pest, but the wound that follows and the consequences for his body and his life are decidedly abnormal.Bitten is written by Erica...
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Season 3
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Episode 2
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14:49
LEGEND: The Casket Girls - Vampires or Victims?
Ain't No Such Thing is BACK after a one-year hiatus, with the story of The Casket Girls, "undesirable" women from the early 18th Century shipped from France to the U.S. Gulf Coast cities of Mobile, Biloxi and New Orleans for the sole p...
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Season 3
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Episode 1
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45:32
HORROR MOVIE REVIEW: The Night House
The whole Ain't No Such Thing crew saw David Bruckner's The Night House and had to talk about it. Amanda, Kevin, Jess, and Erica discuss this film along with hopes for the upcoming Hellraiser reboot, to be produced by the same...
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Season 2
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Episode 20
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28:56
SCARY STORY: The Men of Pinewood Lane - A Back to Nature Horror
Darryl's commute through the Florida pine woods has become routine. He sees the same trees, the same one pump gas station, even the same walking traveler on the road every day. He drives without thinking and without truly seeing until tha...
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Season 2
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Episode 19
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10:49
SCARY STORY: Turtle Soup - A Backwoods Cannibal Horror
A good ole boy couch-surfing on the rotting sofa of friends in BFE learns the fine art of harvesting roadkill from his hosts but soon finds himself in a unique quandary when a moment of impulsive anger brings together his new talents and the ba...
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Season 2
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Episode 18
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16:03
LEGEND: Robert the Doll - The Most Haunted Doll in the World
Our Legend series of hauntings continues with "the most haunted doll in the world", Robert the Doll. Kevin and Jess paid a visit to Robert while on vacation in Key West, and what they discovered was genuinely unexpected! Listen to their tale of...
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Season 2
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Episode 17
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1:13:14
LEGEND: The Myrtles Plantation - Haunted Travels
Amanda, Kevin, and Jessica discuss haunted travel experiences and Jessica's recent trip to one of America's most haunted homes, The Myrtles Plantation. She has a photo that may or may not show the image of Chloe, the most famous of the pl...
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Season 2
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Episode 16
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45:19
SCARY STORY: The Twisted Woman - A Haunting in the Trees
As an old woman's bizarre story of a twisted, beckoning tree creature unfolds, the young reporter interviewing her starts to wonder if the danger is in the swamp or from the old woman herself. The Twisted Woman is written by Er...
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Season 2
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Episode 15
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16:09
LEGEND: The Beast of Busco - Indiana Monster Turtle
In 1948, a northern Indiana farmer encountered something in his lake that terrified him, a turtle so large those who witnessed it later compared it to the size of a small passenger car. His successor on the farm went so far as to use bait...
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Season 2
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Episode 14
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30:51
LEGEND: Pope Lick Monster - The Kentucky Goat-Man
Just outside Louisville, Kentucky, there is a train trestle famous for its devious, dangerous denizen, the Goat-Man - The Pope Lick Monster. This scheming critter lures the curious and the daring onto the bridge with its arcane abilities, only ...
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Season 2
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Episode 13
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38:34
SCARY STORY - Winter of Bromeliads - Demonic Ritual Horror
A lone woman and her canine companion makes her way to a lonesome beach for a day of much needed solitude, only to find evidence of some arcane ritual. She soon falls ill and relies on the suspect generosity of the locals to keep her healthy an...
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Season 2
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Episode 12
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25:55
LEGEND: Arkansas Fouke Monster - The Boggy Creek Bigfoot
After two hurricanes, COVID-induced periods of remote work and remote learning, and months of changes in day jobs and growth in our comics publishing business, WE. ARE. BACK. Our first LEGENDS episode in 6 months is here, and it features the st...
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Season 2
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Episode 11
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35:53
SCARY STORY: Possum Princess - Backwoods Monster Body Horror
A parent's worst nightmare is helplessness in a moment of utter need for their child. When that emergency is life-threatening and happens in the depths of the Florida wilds, a frightened and desperate mother will turn to almost anyone. But to w...
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Season 2
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Episode 10
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16:34
SCARY STORY: Betty & Veronica - Giant Snake Monster Horror
Even the most skilled snake hunters take great care in the Everglades. Legends of monster gators and snakes and boars bounce around the bars and the message boards like rumors of cheating county commissioners, but every once in a while...every ...
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Season 2
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Episode 9
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23:34
SCARY STORY: Mudriders - A Southern Bigfoot Horror
Rawley just wants to kiss a girl...just about any girl...so, against his better judgment, he accompanies his cousin - the local stud - to a mudriding party in a local country dirt pit. Confronted with backwoods machismo and beer-soaked behavior...
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Season 2
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Episode 8
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16:00
SCARY STORY: The Baptist III - The Hayride - A Halloween Horror
Halloween, 1983. A shy young man joins his church youth group for a Halloween alternative gathering and hayride. Nothing goes as expected, as he finds himself the object of the affections of a girl he never before met and follows her onto a hau...
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Season 2
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Episode 7
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23:25
SCARY STORY: Mother of the Swamp - Bayou Occult Horror
You think you know what happens to folks out in the swamps...and why? You don't know nothin'. When people start to disappear from one diminishing little bayou village, everybody has a theory, but ain't none of'em right...or even close, for that...
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Season 2
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Episode 6
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22:21
LEGEND: Louisiana Rougarou - The Southern Werewolf
The Ain't No Such Thing tour of Southern, hirsute cryptids lands in Lousiana to check in on the most Southern of werewolves - the swamp-dwelling Rougarou! This lupine ole cuss not only morphs into a half-man/half-wolf beastie under the...
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Season 2
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Episode 5
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38:02
SCARY STORY: Kid Gloves - Creepy Clown Doll Horror
In the 1970's, empty parking lots spawned traveling carnivals, rife with rusted rides, grizzled barkers, and tainted games of skill. It was in one of these rancid attractions that a lonely little girl with a resentful, acid-tongued mother wins ...
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Season 2
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Episode 4
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16:50
LEGEND: Florida Skunk Ape
Ain't No Such Thing takes on the guise of Florida Man and dips WAY down into the Peninsula to look into reports of The Great Cypress Forest's own Bigfoot, the Skunk Ape (a.k.a. Swamp Cabbage Man, a.k.a. Stink Ape, a.k.a. Myakka Ape). W...
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Season 2
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Episode 3
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31:16
SCARY STORY: Aladdin's Castle - 1980's Mall Arcade Horror
In the 1980's, dismal mall goths prowled the corridors of retail riches, primed to show off their deviant looks and worry the normies. But, deep down, they ultimately wanted the same attention we all crave, from parents and teachers and...poten...
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Season 2
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Episode 2
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12:45