Next Level University

#1358 - How Kevin Built His Belief - Alan Interviews Kevin

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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In this episode, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros dive into the inspiring story of Kevin's journey in developing his self-belief. Alan conducts a thought-provoking interview with Kevin, unraveling the transformative process he underwent. This engaging conversation aims to empower listeners who are just starting their own journeys, demonstrating that success is not only possible but also within their reach.

Links mentioned:
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700 
Next Level Hope Foundation - https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/next-level-hope-foundation/

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Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

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Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

Email 💬
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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

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Show notes:
[3:50] How much did Kevin believe in himself?
[7:30] How did Kevin do it when he didn't have belief?
[11:04] Deeper understanding
[14:35] Nathan expresses his appreciation for the invaluable coaching services he received from Alan
[15:07] Troubleshooting is a deeper understanding
[20:19] Practice your failure in private
[27:07] Outro


Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Speaker 1:

Your confidence, your belief and your aligned self-worth are required for your holistic success, and I think the sooner you realize that, the sooner you understand that right now I have to go through what's perceived as difficult and uncomfortable, because eventually I'll be grateful I did.

Speaker 2:

But looking back in hindsight, you have a deeper understanding. Do you think you believe? I guess, how much do you think you believed in yourself? now, looking back, in comparison to most people?

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Next Level University. I am your host, Kevin Paul Mary.

Speaker 2:

And I am your co-host, alan Lazarus, at.

Speaker 1:

Next Level University. We believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for Dream Chasers.

Speaker 2:

We bring you seven episodes per week to help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth.

Speaker 1:

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, for free. Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we teach you how to level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. The reason I am laughing is because, for some reason, my other microphone none of my other microphones are working, for some reason, so I'm using the old-school microphone. I don't have a mic arm for it. But again, messy action Fail forward. We're going to get through the episode because that's what we do, but if I am sounding a little bit different or looking different on YouTube, that is the reason why my head is massive, because I have to lean in towards the camera. We hope you enjoyed the latest episode. It was episode number 1357. Three questions to ask yourself to have more clarity. Today. For episode number 1358, we don't have the title because we don't know what it is, but we'll make sure the actual verbage is there. Alan's going to interview me on something I don't know what. We haven't discussed it. Let's see what happens.

Speaker 2:

So, for the old listeners, who haven't heard Kevin's story in a long time, and for the new listeners which we have a lot and we're grateful we want to make sure. I guess my intention with this episode is simple. It's not just the message, it is the messenger. It's not just what you know, it's who you are. And so what I want this episode to be, kev, is to pull back the curtain on what it really took to get to the place that you are, because I think, in many ways, you've reached a level beyond what you thought was possible. And I want to get back to the grassroots of what Next Level U stands for. Which is Next Level U stands for a simple principle. There's always another level, and the idea is a really simple one.

Speaker 2:

If you want to get to the next level in your life your health, wealth, love or life you're going to have to probably go inside yourself at a deeper level. And the reason why is because there's really three things that need to align Who you are, which is your identity, the process by which you achieve your goals and dreams, and then the actual goals themselves. And so, when I first met Kev, he was clear on who he was, but not clear on his goals. And I think that you really need all three. Imagine someone who's absolutely clear on their goals, absolutely clear on the process, on how to get there, and very clear on who they are.

Speaker 2:

And when you reach a new level, you have to reevaluate who you are And then you have to reevaluate your goals And then you have to reevaluate the process by which to get to those goals, because if you change your goals now, you have to change the process. So my first question I guess it would be an open-ended one which would be you talk about how you didn't feel like you believed in yourself, and I think that's true in comparison to you now, but looking back in hindsight, you have a deeper understanding. Do you think you believe? I guess, how much do you think you believed in yourself now, looking back in comparison to most people? Because I think back then you thought you had zero belief, but I think you had sneaky self-belief because you did a lot of things that were quite reckless for someone who doesn't believe in themselves.

Speaker 1:

I don't know. When I look back, i still don't think I had that much belief because, remember we used to do we would do a live podcast every single week And the team would give us feedback and they'd say have you crushed it? or whatever. Usually I get really good feedback. Usually the team beat up Alan because Alan wanted more serious feedback than I. But I remember saying to you I don't care what people think of the performance, i care what's going on in my head, because that's all that matters to me, because what's going on in my head is what's dictating the performance, that I may have done a lot of reckless things, but my thought process during those was probably mostly fear.

Speaker 1:

I'm telling you there were certain things that I had a lot of belief in Anything physical. I had a lot of belief in My ability to lift a weight or run fast or whatever it is. That was something I had, but that was my body, because I knew I had a capable, a strong, capable body And because I had done that for a long time. It's like I was doing cartwheels and backflips when I was young, so I always felt confident there. I always had a lot of belief around that With a lot of other stuff, even my job. There were certain things I wasn't good at that I did not think I could get good at And I was 25. So no, looking back I do believe my perspective was very accurate. Where some stuff it probably looked like I believed in myself a ton, but it's probably because I just had a lot of reps.

Speaker 2:

Okay, now that you do have higher self-belief, which I do believe is the most important factor long term for anyone to manifest their dream life, their goals and to become who they aspire to be. I think self-belief is first. I think number two is who you surround yourself with because of number one and how much they believe in themselves. But for you, now that you actually do have quite a bit of self-belief, i guess, first question, statistically speaking, just being honest here and vulnerable, how much self-belief do you think you have from zero to 10? If 10 is the most you've ever seen and zero is the least self-belief you've ever seen, now that you kind of know that a lot of people are operating within maybe delusion or ego and not real authentic self-belief inside of themselves, eight, okay. So where were you at the beginning of the journey six years ago?

Speaker 1:

Four, three, four.

Speaker 2:

Okay, all right. It's interesting because usually you don't shoot for things above three or four, if you have a belief of three or four, and so you were shooting for things way past three, or at least you appeared to be.

Speaker 1:

I was. I just think for me it was. If I can, i'm just willing to suffer. I think that's one of the unique things about me is I don't always know how to do it And I don't always believe I can figure it out either. That's something that's. I had a very fixed mindset with that. But I did know if I get on a train that looks like it's going to lead to success. I'm pretty good at showing up every day That. I think that's why I did a lot of the stuff I did and the way I did it, but I don't I never. I was talking to somebody the other day and it was just very clear that this person had a lot of belief, just based on their decisions, based on what they said, based on their goals. It was very clear that they had a lot of belief and when I compare that to old Kev, it's not their way ahead of where I was For sure, for sure.

Speaker 2:

Okay, now that you have belief, how did you do it before without it? That's a really good question for our listeners who are struggling with this.

Speaker 1:

I got around you. It's hard. That's a hard answer because I know that's not replicable for most people. I got around people who believed in themselves, who kind of didn't understand that I didn't believe in myself, kind of, and then I figured out how to stay alive. It was almost like Okay, cool, this is a good frame and this is kind of a hardcore frame. But if you're a lion and all my friends are lions and you think I'm a lion, but I know I'm not a lion, i just have to do what lions do until you think I am one, and then I become one And then I can start acting like one. I think that's what I did. It was just Okay.

Speaker 2:

Weird analogy. Do you think you're a lion now?

Speaker 1:

I would say so yeah, yeah, okay Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Nice, okay, that's the brain science piece where you can actually change your brain. So what if you actually do believe in yourself? And so now you've reached a place where you believe in yourself and you know you believe in yourself even more than people who you used to know for a fact had more self-belief than you. Yeah, what's that been like?

Speaker 1:

It's very It's very reassuring That's the best way to put it. It's very reassuring that you're just in way more control than you think, or you're in way more control than you ever realized. I never felt like I was creating my future or my present. I never really felt that. When you don't have confidence, it's very hard for you to understand how you're impacting the rest of your life, because you're not really focused on that. You're focused on getting through the day, getting through the week, getting through the month. So there is a level of reassurance that's powerful, where I actually feel like I am in control of my results.

Speaker 1:

Now, not all of them, or I won't say not all of them. I'm not in full control of all my results, but I'm in more control than I've ever been. I feel really, really good about that. It's a very reassuring, connecting piece of oh interesting, i can kind of do anything I want within the realm of my capabilities. That I should spend as much time figuring out what my actual capabilities are, because that's going to serve me when it comes to goal setting, because I'm actually capable of way more than I ever thought. That's what I would say.

Speaker 2:

I would argue that you can actually shoot for things beyond your current capabilities.

Speaker 1:

I would say so too Okay.

Speaker 2:

Can you go into helping that land for someone who might be?

Speaker 1:

at a three or four. I don't know if that will land, because it's almost the. This is why I think reflection is so important to me, because when you go back and you look at what you thought was possible, when you reflect it allows, it's almost like okay, if I go back three years and then I figure out okay, three years ago I never, ever ever, believed where we'd be today is where, or where we are today is where we'd be, what does that mean? about three years from today, it's. I'm even. I'm way more off. Here's the interesting thing I'm way more accurate about where we'll be in three years, but I'm also way off because I'm way better than I thought I would be three years ago. So there's no possible way I don't get way better in three years than I got in the last three years, like exponentially better. I don't know if I can explain that, because it depends on. It depends on your relationship with the growth you've had since the last time you checked in. That's the best way I can explain that All right.

Speaker 2:

You and I in the beginning of this journey, we didn't understand. What we didn't understand makes perfect sense, and we've helped each other drive to five on many different things. I used to think I used to think that deeper understanding was really all that mattered, because without a deeper understanding, you can't make good choices And if you can't make good choices, you can't create great results. And that's just a very logical thought process. You loved tactics And now it's fascinating because you're like loving deeper understanding And I'm like focused on how to way more than I used to be, like I had the whole team send how to questions for the training we're going to do today. Because I now understand I value deeper understanding. Because deeper understanding I always felt like the how to was easy. In other words, ok, your microphone broke And or whatever mixer microphone we don't even know yet.

Speaker 3:

OK.

Speaker 2:

Kevin understands enough about microphones and mixers and audacity and podcast production at this stage, with all the shows we produce, plus the thirteen hundred fifty eight episodes we've done on our own show, to where you have a higher probability of troubleshooting and finding the root cause of this issue than I do.

Speaker 2:

Which is why when I came on the microphones today, i was basically like, should I even try to help him troubleshoot or should I just stay quiet and let him do his thing? because you were frazzled, but but by frazzled, frustrated not in a bad way, but frustrated at trying to figure it out. Trying to figure something out is frustrating. If you know a lot about cars and you bring the car to the mechanic when it's broken, they troubleshoot and find the issue quickly, just like you with podcasting. So it's almost like I want you to go back to past Kev, when I first met him six years ago, and from this new consciousness, this new awareness, this new hyper consciousness, i want you to troubleshoot what the real issue was for our listeners. In hindsight, what was the real issue?

Speaker 1:

I think it's the simplest but most complicated thing on the planet. When you don't believe in yourself, you don't try. When you don't try, you don't get results. When you don't get results, you get stuck And then you convince yourself you're not capable. I'm telling you, I think that was, You know, the biggest difference between six years ago, Kev, and today, Kev. I just try a lot more stuff, That's all it is really And obviously.

Speaker 2:

I've learned a lot. Why don't people try?

Speaker 1:

Because they think they're going to fail.

Speaker 2:

And honestly, they're most likely going to in the beginning. That's the that's a fact, yeah.

Speaker 1:

I think it's almost like that's why motivation stuff doesn't work.

Speaker 2:

And that's why tactics do, because they give you certainty enough to at least try, Because at least you know a tactic might work. But they don't. They don't because you can't just deploy a tactic in the same scenario and expect it to work the same way.

Speaker 1:

You can get started. Yeah, but, like, when I started this podcast, i googled how to start a podcast. That's what I googled And I found the equipment and I did all that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that was enough to get me going. Then it's like then you get deeper understanding. So in hindsight it's actually both you. you need a tactic to get started. If you don't believe in yourself, which gives you enough certainty to try, then you try and you inevitably fail. And when you fail you hopefully get deeper understanding as to why you failed. And then you fail forward And then you fail forward. so it's kind of like tactic try, fail, troubleshoot, try better.

Speaker 3:

My name is Nathan Schwerman. I'm from Lawrence Kansas. I've been a client of Allen's for coming on two years now And I really can't recommend this program enough. Allen's always there for me with great advice and holding me accountable every step of the way And really leading by example. I've grown a lot in his program, but he's grown alongside with me, so I'd really recommend joining up on the program and joining the community.

Speaker 1:

Troubleshooting is deeper understanding.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, 100%.

Speaker 1:

I think the tactic a lot of times is the external Do this, do this, do this. This is how you show up, this is what you do, this is the action.

Speaker 2:

And then, i think, a lot of times, deeper understandings, internal But if I give you a tactic, hey, kev, i want you to post an Instagram reel of you on the beach. It's going to crush it because I did it and it worked. But I'm like a I don't know, a 23 year old beautiful woman in a bikini and you're you. It's not going to work the same way, and that's. But that's why tactics mess people up, because it's not supposed to work the same way. You know what I mean. So it's not that simple. But if that gets you to post a reel and then you learn social media because of that last question, because I know we got to jump four minutes from now, all right.

Speaker 2:

I used to say fail forward all the time. I now understand that. I do believe now, having coached a lot more people like this. Fear of failure is very high. Fear of looking bad is like big People are really afraid to look bad And I look back and I was afraid to look bad too, but I kind of just said F it. Even some of my posts. Now it's like this is not going to go well with some of my followers. I know they're not going to like this, even the 450 days in a row of exercise or whatever like when I say that, i know that's not a positive bid. with people who follow me, you know what I mean. You know what I mean, but I can't not share it because if I don't share it I'm not being me, and that's worse than if I win all the time at social media or whatever it is So for you.

Speaker 2:

I used to say fail forward. Having been someone who fears success more than failure, i don't think I could ever explain it well For you. And look at that 450 days in a row. I'm not pumped to post that because I'm afraid of success. I don't want to be better than other people. You know what I mean. I don't want to showcase that I'm more capable. So weird For you it was the opposite. You don't want to be seen as less capable For people that also fear what you feared. Can you make fail forward actually land, because I never fully did.

Speaker 1:

I don't know. It's a super hard thing. I would say two things. One, most people are thinking way more about themselves than they are you Way more about themselves. Most people are insecure in certain situations. They're not thinking about your insecurity, they're thinking about their own. They're thinking about their own. The last thing on their mind is you and whatever goofy thing you're doing. Here's the problem The three people that do notice it and reach out to you. You think everybody is that, and that's just not true. That's just not true. That's part one.

Speaker 2:

Okay, what about failure?

Speaker 1:

It's not what people think it is. Failure is not making a mistake, Failure is stopping Again. My favorite thing in the world. Somebody comes to me and says I have a test to take. I'm afraid to fail. Can you retake it? Yes or no? Yes, you can't fail. It's possible. It's quite literally impossible for you to fail. I'll give you the 50 bucks to retake it. You're good, You can't fail. You just didn't succeed. Yet There's a difference. I think failure is final. This episode is only as important as the next episode we do. So if this is the last episode ever, this is we failed, in my opinion.

Speaker 2:

But if your goal is to not look bad, you with this crapier mic.

Speaker 1:

Well.

Speaker 2:

I hate it.

Speaker 1:

I have an interview later and I'm already thinking about it.

Speaker 2:

How have you overcome that? That's good. How are you overcoming that? right now, real talk listeners. We didn't want to do this episode with crapier mics. No, no, this eats me alive, but we'd rather do it than not have an episode. How did you overcome that?

Speaker 1:

At this point I think it's just the identity. When you do it long enough, it becomes.

Speaker 2:

But people can't have that identity unless they do it long enough, which they won't.

Speaker 1:

It's just the small stuff. It's small. That's the problem is, people will see us failing on such a grand scale now, but you haven't seen most of my failures, not you, you have.

Speaker 3:

But if you're listening, you haven't seen the day-to-day. I've seen at least one. This is a good one.

Speaker 1:

We have something we talked about. It's called the Out Here Jeffin Club, where we meet every other week and there is no agenda. We just meet and have fun. I did it for one week and then I got taken from me because I did it so badly I failed. quote, unquote. I want to be very honest. They're weed-whacking outside. It's raining.

Speaker 2:

I can't hear them, so you're good.

Speaker 1:

Well, it's because this mic sucks, perfect.

Speaker 1:

I literally had a moment where I felt bad. I was like, oh God, i can't believe I Jeffed that. I Jeffed that. The team's probably looking at me like I'm an idiot, alan's probably looking at me like I'm an idiot And they was like, whatever, what's the big deal? It's not that big of a deal. So I just think you have to start practicing your failures in private long before you start failing in public. But just like your successes, you're going to have a lot of successes in private long before you ever have them in public. Most of them, most of my successes, you will never see because they're not public.

Speaker 2:

Can you give us an example?

Speaker 1:

Man, it's hard because we are so big on our wins, because it's part of our business, but, like next level podcast solutions, i had a quarter of a million dollar a year business. Nobody knows that. Nobody knows that.

Speaker 3:

That's me They do now, i know And again for me.

Speaker 1:

I value that because I value that. you know the money and the impact and the fact that we've gotten where we have, but you would never know that if I didn't say it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And here's the thing I all okay cool. That means I won behind the scenes 45 times in order to get 45 clients. I also lost behind the scenes considering we've had 20 something clients.

Speaker 2:

How many times have you lost? Okay, so 45 clients. How many clients have you tried to get? Oh, my goodness gracious. So how many, how many strikeouts?

Speaker 1:

10 times that.

Speaker 2:

Okay, so 450. At least At least Okay To get 45 clients.

Speaker 1:

But here's the interesting thing This is the okay, this is a great, this is a really good way to look at it. The first year I started Next Level Podcast Solutions, I probably got one client and lost one client, Okay.

Speaker 2:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

Second year I probably got eight clients and maybe contacted 20 people. So you can see, as the success increases, the failure increases.

Speaker 2:

And you also lost. How many clients you lost? You lost at least three. The second year I don't remember, but you lost more than one. So the losses increase as well as the successes, right? Yes?

Speaker 1:

But it's almost that. It's almost the. I got one client, but I was also only capable of messaging 10 people that year and getting rejected by 10 people. Then say I got 10 clients next year, then maybe I can message 40 people and get rejected by 40 people. Rinse and rinse and rinse. This year I have no idea how many people I've tried to help And they've just said no or they've just ghosted me, like it just now is. I don't even really think about it.

Speaker 2:

Isn't it weird how you're getting ghosted more now than you ever have, but it's because you're shooting more shots.

Speaker 1:

Well, that but here's the other thing too. Again, it's the reps. I've just done it so many times behind the scenes I don't think about it anymore, Just like when you get in your car you don't think about it. You've just done it so, but in the beginning it was miserable It was challenging, it was difficult.

Speaker 2:

Here's the difference. Yeah, that Steve, one almost took you down.

Speaker 1:

He almost took me down. Here's the difference. Here's the difference. I've said this many, many, many, many times before If the necessity to overcome something is not there, you won't do it. There's a reason. A lot of us face certain fears Driving, riding a bike when we're young, swimming, whatever it is. There's a reason, because it's necessary for our success. Your confidence, your belief and your aligned self-worth are required for your holistic success And I think the sooner you realize that, the sooner you understand that. Right now I have to go through what's perceived as difficult and uncomfortable, because eventually I'll be grateful. I did. If you imagine, if you didn't take driving lessons when you were 15 or 16 and get laughed off the road by your instructor, you might not have a license, or you might not be able to ride a bike, or you might not know how to swim, and then you couldn't go here or there.

Speaker 2:

You wouldn't have freedom, you'd have less capabilities, You couldn't take your partner on a date, all of it. Your capabilities become infinitely less, Your possibilities, your opportunities become infinitely less. Because you didn't And I failed my first driver's license. I had to parallel park in Milford man, you didn't fail.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, i took it again.

Speaker 2:

You're right, you're right. That's a great point, awesome.

Speaker 1:

You made a mistake, definitely. I almost failed, i almost didn't succeed. Did you have to?

Speaker 2:

parallel park. Yeah, i remember.

Speaker 1:

I was in drive and I looked back and I forgot to put it in reverse. almost The person gave me a little like hey. I was like oh, my goodness, thank you so much.

Speaker 2:

Terrific That was terrifying Downtown Milford man. Worst place to take it ever. All right, yeah, milford mess, milford mess. That's it, man. That's all I had. I know we also got a transition.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, i'm gonna interview you next. It'll be world class, probably.

Speaker 2:

Most likely, you've failed enough times in interviewing, so you should be good by now.

Speaker 1:

I have. It's been a minute since I've you're easy to interview. I just ask you one question. You just go off for 25 minutes quotes, part dates, whatever it is. Next level nation. If you are looking for growth minded humans who can talk about belief, they can have these kind of conversations. Please join our private Facebook group Next Level Nation. Link is in the show notes.

Speaker 2:

Kevin and I, years ago, had a tradition, starting six years ago actually, where every Father's Day we would get together and everyone else was with their dads, and that was a traditionally sad day for us. Because, for those of you who don't know my story briefly So, my father passed away in a car accident when I was two years old. I had a stepfather from age three to 14. He left my family when we were 14. Kevin didn't know his father until he was 27, 27. So we both grew up without fathers and we know that Father's Day can be a traditionally very sad day.

Speaker 2:

So we created the Next Level Hope Foundation and we do two events a year. One of them is the Father's Day event coming up June 18th. Is that true, the 18th? Yes, okay, the link will be in the show notes to the website and all the information is there. If you are local, you can attend if you know any single parents or if you are a single parent. It's not just for boys without fathers, it's for children of single parents. So all the information you need is on the website. You can donate or you can attend if you're local, only if you are have a child of a single parent, only if you are a single parent or have a child. Yeah, the point is all the information is there.

Speaker 2:

I apologize, you can contribute if you're not local. Kevin and I will be matching funds. We're raising $500. I think we're halfway there already and we're matching an additional 500. So I put you with that. But please donate, please contribute.

Speaker 1:

Simple, through line. We have a charity and we would love if you would help us grow it and impact people.

Speaker 2:

Simple, simple, simple.

Speaker 1:

You're very welcome Tomorrow for episode number 1359,. Kevin interviews Alan. That's the current title And now I changed this. This was how Kevin built his belief Alan interviews Kevin, so we'll figure out a good one for tomorrow. As always, we love you, We appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU, we do not have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Speaker 2:

Keep believing in yourself. Next time on Asia.

Speaker 1:

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Speaker 2:

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get ahold of us is in the show notes.

Speaker 1:

Thank you again And we will talk to you tomorrow.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Alan Lazaros

Host
Head Shot

Kevin Palmieri

Host