Next Level University

#1454 - 3 Common Growth Myths

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

In this episode, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros talk about popular growth myths circulating and clouding our judgments about what's truly achievable. They set the records straight so we can have a more realistic and pragmatic approach towards our personal growth journey. But it's not all about breaking down myths. They also share some universal truths about success and how it's not a one-size-fits-all concept. They dive into the power of positivity, stressing the need to personalize success strategies.

Links mentioned:
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700
Next Level Life Coaching with Alan Lazaros, book a 30-minute call NOW - https://bit.ly/3WpxLLo


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Show notes: 
[3:13] Alan shares a story
[5:35] You can do anything you set your mind to
[10:20] You can do a lot more than people think
[13:36] There is one right answer for success
[16:18] Kim thanks Kevin for going above and beyond in helping launch the Peaceful Productivity podcast
[17:10] All behavior is belief-driven
[19:09] There are principles you can learn and apply
[20:51] You can put one of the pillars on autopilot, and it will just work
[23:49] Everything is either growing or decaying
[31:25] Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Speaker 1:

Next level nation. Welcome back to another special, as always, episode of next level University when we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. We hope you enjoyed our latest episode, episode number 1,453. People pleasers, have you experienced this? I enjoyed that episode very much. Hopefully you did as well today. For episode number 1454, one of Alan's favorite genres of episodes three common Put your put your thing back on three common growth myths. My goodness, for those who are just listening, alan likes to take the Foam off of his microphone occasionally, for some reason.

Speaker 2:

I don't know why I Every time I like to see where the little circle is, so I can make sure I'm speaking into it fair.

Speaker 1:

I appreciate that very much, okay, so we've done this many times, many, many different versions of this, and One of the reasons we started doing this is because we've realized that on social media and in various Platforms, you're really only getting the layer one truth, and While at times it seems like the layer one truth might be empowering, if you really dig into it and you live your life based on that, it actually might hold you back in many, many, many different ways.

Speaker 1:

So we've done many different variations of this, with different Topics or different points, but we always like to come back to these because this is what the heart driven but no BS thing is. The heart driven is you can trust that Alan and I are telling you what we're telling you because we care and we genuinely want to see you win, and the no BS part is sometimes those are hard truths, potentially that other people might not tell you Mm-hmm. So this is a little bit of a vulnerable episode for Alan and I, because neither of us want to come off as but heads for lack of better phrasing. But let's just get right into it. So we're gonna go through the three and then we'll add our thoughts and maybe our reframes on what they would be.

Speaker 2:

Can I provide a quick story first? Yes, you, yes, you sense it. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Come on All right listeners. Kevin and I one time we're driving from Milwaukee to Toronto and we passed the Canadian border and I Turned to Kevin and asked a question. I said how many people you think live in Canada? And he said, I don't know, 90 million, something like that. I was like, ah, it's got to be more than that. Right, it's a really big place, and I think I said 110 million. I don't remember. I would trust you with a memory. We googled it and we were both wildly off is Apparently 37 million human beings in Canada.

Speaker 2:

Now, the reason I'm telling that story is because what if you moved to Canada, thinking that You're gonna have a huge, amazing, wild, massive global economy with great job opportunities in corporate and this is nothing against Canada, by the way. There is probably a great economy up there in some cases. The point is is you can't make good choices without accurate data. That's like trying to say I want to go to the Philippines Because I want to buy a lot of land. There isn't a lot of land in the Philippines.

Speaker 2:

There's 110 million people on those very small islands, and so it's really important that the unpleasant truths that Kevin and I are gonna share with you today it's to help you make better choices, because when you have bad data, when you have inaccurate data, when you have mistruths or myth truths, it affects you, it affects your ability to succeed, it affects your ability to be fulfilled, it affects your ability to make good choices, and so hopefully that provides some context, and the idea here underneath this is that you can't make good decisions with inaccurate data, and If you were going to Canada thinking that it was gonna be a ton of people and a huge population, you'd be inaccurate. And so you know, if you are looking for a lot of land, you should go to Canada. If you're looking for a lot of people, you should go to the Philippines, and I think that that's really a story that I hope represents the value of what truth and accuracy can can bring.

Speaker 1:

I Dig that. Thanks, man. Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah, we're both wrong. You were more wrong than I was, though definitely.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I was. So we're both very wrong. You know, geographically it's larger than the US.

Speaker 1:

Georogically. I didn't know that, but now I do all right, let's let's get into these myths.

Speaker 1:

Mm-hmm. Okay, number one, and hang on for this one, because I know it's gonna sound negative. I'm gonna sound like, I'm gonna sound like a butt head. You can do anything you set your mind to. I was asked on a podcast recently so let's do this Two versions of Kev.

Speaker 1:

If you asked me five years ago let's just say five years ago this question do you believe anybody can do anything they set their mind to? I probably would have said yes. I probably would have said yes. I would have said yeah. Of course, if you work really hard and you believe in yourself and you surround yourself with the right people, you can do anything you want.

Speaker 1:

The one thing I believe I was missing I guess it's the one umbrella of things is circumstance. Alan and I were born in the US, which is the freest country in the world, and we have access to high-speed internet and we can plug our laptops in and see each other in 4K in different states. Somebody who doesn't have access to the internet is going to be at a wild disadvantage compared to us. In some ways, we're a privilege when it comes to that. You can do many of the things you set your mind to for sure, but it does at some time, I believe, become disempowering if you are shooting for stuff that just isn't humanly possible for you. Now, of course, there's always someone that makes it that nobody ever thought would make it, but statistically the number is so low that it most likely isn't going to be me.

Speaker 1:

Now you might say, well, you guys are successful podcasters and that's rare. Yes, but that has nothing to do with my height, it has nothing to do with my athletic ability. It has nothing to do with, I mean, I guess it has to do with education, but Alan's extremely educated. So that's brought me up. If it wasn't for Alan, I wouldn't be here in the way I am. If it wasn't for me, alan might not be here in the way that he is. A lot of things had to go right in order for us to get to where we are today. It would have been much harder if we didn't have access to a lot of the things that we have and we weren't born here. The second part of this is, again, there are some basketball players that are five foot. How tall was Mugsy Bowes? Mugsy Bow, whatever his name is five, six, something like that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, five six and could dunk. I believe he won a slam dunk contest, which is my plan, sir.

Speaker 2:

They might have graded on a curve.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah no, no, no. Have you seen it? Have you ever seen him do it? Oh my god, the man had ups. Is it unbelievable? It's one of the wildest things I've ever seen in my life. Yeah it doesn't make any sense. It doesn't even look real. It's wild. It's like a trampoline in the floor. Yeah, it's nuts. Now you could say well, that could be you, Kev, Me, no, probably statistically no, no.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, this. This was a freak athlete who had really good might not have had a good height genetics, but he had really good bounce genetics and was wildly wildly athletic.

Speaker 1:

I don't want this to be disempowering, and this is the other thing too. What if knowing this helps you set more realistic expectations, because you believe this at a deep level anyway? And when you go to events and people say you can do anything, you set your mind to. Your BS meter goes off and says can you, though? Can you really? Can I actually do everything I really want to do? That? That really is again the. It's a tough thing. I don't want it to sound terrible, I don't want it to sound mean, I don't want it to sound limiting, but I do believe you'd be better off and more empowered If you said what more can I do? Instead of I can do anything I set my mind to.

Speaker 2:

I can do anything I set my mind to is a little bit delusional, I'm certain. I just want to use myself as an example, because I want to lead by example. I'm certain that I cannot be the strongest man on earth. If you've seen those humans, I'm certain that I do not have the genetic gifts for that. There's no chance. I'm certain that I cannot be the fastest man on earth. I'm certain that I cannot be at this stage. I'm 34 year old American male. I cannot be the world's best gymnast. I am. I have giraffe legs. It's not, it's not, it's not gonna happen for me, and that's okay.

Speaker 2:

Now can you do anything you set your mind to. No, the mistruth that I want to transform into a truth is you can do a lot more than you are currently demonstrating, and you can do a lot more than most people think, and I think that that is so much more empowering. No, you're not going to swim faster than Michael Phelps. No, you're not going to run faster than Usain Bolt Probably not. Okay, unless you're one in a billion. You probably won't. But you can probably do a lot more than most people think, and I think that in those events when they say you can do anything you set your mind to. I think it's empowering as a start, but I think as you get older and you mature and time goes by and you work hard and you work smart and you get better and you grow, you start to realize a lot of that is fluffy and a lot of that is inaccurate. What is accurate is you can do way more than most people think you are capable of and, given enough time, you can achieve great things.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to do a bit of research here, because I was watching something one time I'll leave the person nameless but he was doing a training and he said everybody in here can be a billionaire if you do the right things, and I was like there was like 500 people in the room. I was like, okay, 500 people. I was like I wonder how many billionaires there are. So I looked it up and, as of right now it says 3,194 pretty close.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you're off by six Interesting. I looked it up back in 2012 and I can just do the math.

Speaker 1:

You're a freak, so 3,200.

Speaker 2:

I can't be the fastest man in the world. I can understand business 3,200.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you're telling me you can just get all 500 of these people to be added to that list. No, and you're gonna. You're gonna multiply that list by 20% right just today.

Speaker 2:

No the truth is, some of them probably could be given several decades.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, the truth is, maybe some of you in here could be, but not all of not all of you, or it's just that base of any. If you, if you really wanted to do what it took, you could do it, leaving out the fact that maybe the person who is a billionaire had some advantages, or maybe they they had some adversities that they went through that actually created advantages for them. Later. I was on a podcast today. I'm the very interesting, very interesting guy. He's 83 and he is a bodybuilder.

Speaker 1:

He's the oldest person ever To compete in the bodybuilding Show that he's doing. He's trying to get to the Arnold's, which the Arnold's are like a very big show. This, this, this guy, is impressive written. He Went through a world war two when he was a baby, ended up moving to Canada and he had the hitchhike to work. It was like a whole thing he is. If I Don't think he would say you could do anything you set your mind to, he would probably say you could probably do more With what you have than you realize, and I think that's empowering, just like I said, okay, number two strong work.

Speaker 1:

I love these episodes.

Speaker 2:

I know you do. I'm also obsessed with accurate thinking and truth.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that is a fact, All right. Number two there is one right answer for success. I was on a podcast the other day and One of the questions that I get asked often because it's in my bio is can you really succeed without struggling? And I always smile when, when they asked me that question. That's one of my favorite questions and I said I always want to preface it with this the size of your goals will dictate the size of your struggle.

Speaker 1:

If I Wanted to just have an okay podcast for the rest of time, alan would cut back to Alan and I would cut back to an episode a week. That's easy, that's not that much of a struggle. I wouldn't have to worry about growing the business. Life wouldn't be that hard all things considered. But obviously it is based on our goals and and we had a dialogue on that and she said and this great podcast? She said what do you think of the monks who live in caves that say everything should be easy and we can make it that way? What do you think of that advice? And I said well, maybe, number one. Maybe they believe that I'm not. I'm not arguing that they. They don't, but there's probably not a lot going on in the cave. If that's really what their life is like, there's probably not a lot going on. I said for some people. I think that probably is empowering, because there are people who they might wake up in the morning, spill their coffee, break their shoelace and think it's the worst day ever and think that they're terrible. They probably need some of that positivity. They probably need some of that extra positive thinking where if I do that, I'm not gonna accomplish my goals. I'm not gonna accomplish my goals now. Could you get to a place where you are so Transcendent where you think everything is easy? I don't know. I don't plan on ever getting there. I don't know if I even aspire to get there. I go to the gym and lift heavy. That's always gonna be heavy and hard, most likely. But I said it's it's polarity.

Speaker 1:

Some people Need the advice of hey, if you don't get it together, you're gonna lose. If you don't get it together, your business is not gonna exist in a year. If you don't start having difficult conversations with your partner, you're in trouble. If you don't start taking ownership, you're gonna get left behind. But the other side of the coin is hey, you need to stop taking so much damn ownership. If you keep taking as much ownership as you are, everybody's gonna walk all over you and then you're gonna get taken advantage of even more. You can see how one piece of advice Can't really land for everybody at the same time to the same level. So that's. Number two is there is one right answer for success. Alan's advice is gonna be different than mine. Alan's advice is based on what's worked for him and clients. My advice is based on what's worked for me and clients, but it might not work for you in the way it's worked for us, and I think that's very important to put out there.

Speaker 2:

The only thing I would add to that is it's contextual, based on the goal, which you already had mentioned.

Speaker 2:

If your goal is to build muscle, my advice has to be very different than if your goal is to lose weight. 100% and and I think that a lot of people, everyone is telling you all behavior is belief-driven, and that means everything we say and do. So everything I'd say and everything I do and everything Kevin says and does is belief-driven. And if we have beliefs that conflict with yours, that's either because we are more accurate and have a more optimal solution, or or we don't understand you at a deep enough level to give you good advice. One of the reasons we study our listeners, one of the reasons why we do listener calls, is because we want to get to know you. We want to get to know what are your goals, what are your dreams. You know primarily women in their 20s, 30s, 40s and 50s who struggle with courage, clarity and confidence, who want more Success and fulfillment out of their career and their intimate relationships. That we didn't just grab that out of thin air. That is typically our demographic and it has evolved a bit, as Kevin and I have evolved, but at the end of the day, I'm not a mom, kevin's not a mom, we, we aren't women, we don't Understand and we don't know what advice to give you in the mom realm or those kinds of things. And so, at the end of the day, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to success, because there is no one version of success.

Speaker 2:

There is principles that tend to be true, but the way in which you deploy them, the way in which you hone them, the, the amounts in which you use them. I was on the phone earlier with one of our team members and I said, when I was 24, this is what would have been optimal for me, but you need to. You need to ask yourself if that's aligned for you, and I honor whatever choice you make. And, yeah, maybe four years from now you look back on this conversation. You say, oh, he was right. Or maybe you look back and go, damn, I shouldn't have done that. But it's your choice.

Speaker 2:

And what I would say is this there's no one size fits all approach to success or to fulfillment, but there are principles that you can learn and those principles do rain true over time, but the way in which you deploy them, the way the amount that you use, like okay, right now, the best way to get to work is in America is typically a car, because we don't have as good a public transportation as some of the other countries. Okay, but which car you choose is entirely subjective. You can choose a Jeep, or you can choose a van, or you can choose a Tesla, or you can choose electric, or you can choose gas. There's a lot of subjective within the objective principles, and you could also do a horse if you wanted to, you could walk, you could ride your bike, you could take an airplane, you could take a train. There's a lot of options and there is no one size fits all. So anyone who tells you hey, this is the only way, they're not only wrong but most likely arrogant.

Speaker 1:

Speaking of vehicles, if you see me looking down, it's because Taryn's battery has died, so she has stranded and I'm trying to figure out. I said you could just take my car and just let me know. Let me know what you need. So if you see me looking at my phone, that's all. It is Strong work on all that.

Speaker 2:

There's a lot going on.

Speaker 1:

She could ride a horse. She could ride a horse. You can't ride a horse on a highway. Oh fair, what if you knew that or not?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah it's a law. I occasionally frequent highways on my horse.

Speaker 1:

Well, I assume somebody had to and they were like hey, we got to put a sign up. You know, under bicycle and chariot we have to put a horse.

Speaker 2:

We got to throw that under there.

Speaker 1:

We found somebody on the highway.

Speaker 2:

All right, third one. That's the third one.

Speaker 1:

You can't ride a horse on a highway. Third one, probably my favorite, honestly, all things considered you can put one of the pillars on autopilot. You can put one of the pillars of health, wealth or love on autopilot and it'll just work. That is something that Alan and I have been guilty of in, definitely in seasons for sure. Fitness, mostly fitness, but finances we made, we made, we had a really good quarter and then we took our foot off the gas and we didn't have such a good quarter the next quarter.

Speaker 1:

What you're putting effort and intention into is going to deliver direct results. If you're saying, well, I'll do this later. Well, you know, I know I haven't been as intentional in my relationship. I'll do that when. I'll do that when we get to a certain amount of clients. I'll do that when I get a new job. I'll do that when I move. I'll do that when, whatever it may be that, when most likely isn't going to happen, because it's just not a habit. Yet it's not a habit. I'll go to the gym when that's that. I mean. You hear that all the time. I'll go to the gym when new years comes around, when I move closer, when they get new equipment, when I have someone to go with.

Speaker 1:

There's a guy I follow, alex Hermosi, and he's a very intelligent guy. He is, he's a great businessman. But he said something he said if you really want to and I don't necessarily agree with this but if you really want to do something, try to do it when it's hard to start, because if you can do it when it's hard, you can always do it when it's easy. Now again, going back to the previous one, I don't know if that's the right answer for everyone, but I do find that if I start a habit when it's really really hard for me to do it, when things get a little bit easier, it's way easier for me to do.

Speaker 1:

I don't think that's for everybody. I'm not saying that's what everybody should do, but if you're putting something on autopilot, saying yeah, I'll get to this later, it's getting worse. Unfortunately, even if you don't think it is, my body, right, right, fitness is going down. If I'm not pouring into it. My relationship is not getting better. If I'm not making it better, it's getting worse. It's the same with the business. I would really hate for you, whether you're watching or listening, to say, okay, I'll get to this when I can take some time off of that. If you're not putting energy into it, if you're not putting intention into it, you're probably not getting. You're most likely not getting results and, if anything, it might actually be going backwards, which I don't want for you.

Speaker 2:

All right, kev. Yes, this one, my replacement belief. Yes, my empowering belief is what was the one? Because I have mine.

Speaker 1:

Which, what do you?

Speaker 2:

mean you can put one on autopilot. What was the?

Speaker 1:

exact one you can put one of the pillars on autopilot.

Speaker 2:

Okay, you can put one of the pillars on autopilot. False. My replacement is everything, whether we like it or not, whether we're aware of it or not, is either growing or decaying.

Speaker 1:

Pretty hardcore.

Speaker 2:

So if you are focused on health and wealth but not your intimate relationship, your intimate relationship is coasting, which means it's probably coasting downhill. If you're focused on love and health but not wealth, your money is coasting, which is most likely coasting downhill. Even people who have investment accounts that are building wealth over time, they still have to reallocate the funds. They still have to check in every quarter. They actually do that. They reallocate it's called asset allocation every quarter Because if they didn't, the stocks that aren't doing well would die. They need to reallocate, reallocate. So what you put intention towards, what you put effort towards, what you put time towards, we all know this right. The condo I live in if the landscapers were suddenly to not come, the housekeeper were suddenly to not show up, emilia and I were to just neglect it, the house would decay. One of our gutters is messed up and this is on the back end of my condo and it's very high.

Speaker 1:

This is like we don't even have a ladder to do this. I'll be. I'll be down, you know, come on down. It's on your horse. What are your?

Speaker 2:

thoughts and I've been putting it off. And, essentially, if I keep putting this off, the condo will eventually leak and decay and rot. That's the truth with everything. If you put off your health, you will get worse. If you put off your business, it will get worse. There's this book called the self managing company. I don't like it. It's not true, it's not real. Now can you lead leaders and then leaders run your company? Yes, but that requires you leading them, that requires time and effort. And so, at the end of the day, let's do this Kev real quick, let's read all three and let's each give our new belief. So the old, false belief is X, y, z and ours is ABC.

Speaker 1:

Number one you can do anything you set your mind to. Mine would be if you do the right thing that you're supposed to be doing, you can be way better at that than many other people. Just make sure you find the right thing.

Speaker 2:

Fire, mine would be. You can't do anything you set your mind to. No one can, because we all are born different. But you are capable of far more than you and most people realize if you are consistent over a long enough period of time. I dig that.

Speaker 1:

Number two there is one right answer for success. I would say there are many fundamentals that crossover. That would be beneficial to all of us, but every patient needs a different dose and a different medicine. Well said, yeah, thank you, good luck. Well said, good luck. What do you got?

Speaker 2:

Mine would be. What was it again? The one there is? There is one right answer for success.

Speaker 1:

Trust me, I couldn't say the my reframe. If you asked me. I don't remember what I said. There is one right answer for success.

Speaker 2:

There are fundamental principles to success. That's what I said Can't have that. I'm not done yet. Okay, there are fundamental principles to success. Yeah, that apply to all of us, but the way in which we deploy them and Understand them needs to be unique to us and to our goals.

Speaker 1:

Not terrible, well you know, I'm just.

Speaker 2:

Not my best work. Number three you can put one of the pillars on autopilot.

Speaker 1:

Not only can you not put the pillars on autopilot, but you can also put the pillars on autopilot. Not put something on autopilot, but putting it on autopilot actually makes it harder to get momentum back later. Well said, well said. I get to go first, I have the benefit of going first on all these two so technically going second gives me more time, so it should be better. Well, I see, I appreciate you calling yourself out. I gave you an out, of course.

Speaker 2:

I appreciate it. I wouldn't take that. That's not. That ain't me. So this is you can put one of the pillars on autopilot. Yeah, that's correct, mine is. You can't Very well, so mine is if you want a holistically well developed life, you're going to have to put time, effort and intention into health, wealth and love consistently.

Speaker 1:

Right on. I'm glad we did this because, again, I always get a little insecure when we do these, because I know some of the stuff we say might sound hardcore and the last thing I ever want you to do, whether you're watching or listening, is to think that we're not trying to empower. But I've just seen some of these things go some common mistruths, even though they're layer one. If you build your life around that, if you build your strategy around that, you might be in trouble. So we want to make sure we help you avoid that. Always, always, always, always Go ahead.

Speaker 2:

I love these episodes. That's it. I know that those are good yeah.

Speaker 1:

So one of your current myths is there are no people like me, nobody is like me, nobody will get me. I can't find people like me. Please join our private Facebook group, next level nation. It is filled with dream chasers just like you, and it's not a myth, I promise.

Speaker 2:

I heard a statistic earlier today. I was on my walk and I was listening to a book called the science of money and Brian Tracy was talking about how it's called the two two seven rule it takes when you start a business. Statistically speaking, it takes two years to run out of money, two years to break even and seven years to be successful and profitable. Well, statistically speaking, and 94% of businesses go out of business within a five year period.

Speaker 2:

If you want to start a business or have a business and you are struggling I adore helping people with their businesses I will help you make more money. I will help you design your business in a way that is more profitable. I will help you understand how to make sure you can succeed and set yourself up for the long run. It will be hard truths at times, but it will be based on the fundamentals that work. Kevin and I got here and we're about to cross the seven year mark and we got here because of business fundamentals that I can teach you and that I can, more importantly, teach them in a unique way that is suited to your business, your industry, your goals and your lifestyle, which I think a lot of people cannot do.

Speaker 1:

One of my favorite quotes we've ever gotten from a mentor was if I was in your skin. It's very weird and sounds very gross, but he was basically saying I could say if I was you or what I would do. I remember he said what's not what I would do, it's what I would do if I was in your skin. I'm like, okay, it's pretty gross. I've used that, though. I use that very often. That's what we're trying to do. What you would do in your skin.

Speaker 2:

I know who that mentor was Shout out to Kevin.

Speaker 1:

No, that was Nick, wasn't it oh?

Speaker 2:

was it? He was Nick. Oh, oops.

Speaker 1:

Shout out to Nick.

Speaker 2:

Shout out to Nick All right, we're going to go now and Nick, Next Elevation Tomorrow for episode number 1455.

Speaker 1:

Another way to create more accountability. I, alan, kind of teased this a little bit earlier this week. I don't remember what episode it was, but I'm going to reveal one of the reasons I am on fire when it comes to fitness and mobility. So we'll talk about that tomorrow. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU we turn to fans. We have family. We'll talk to you all tomorrow.

Speaker 2:

Keep living in the truth. Next Elevation Strong work.

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