Next Level University
Confidence, mindset, relationships, limiting beliefs, family, goals, consistency, self-worth, and success are at the core of hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros' heart-driven, no-nonsense approach to holistic self-improvement. This transformative, 7 day per week podcast is focused on helping dream chasers who have been struggling to achieve their goals and are seeking community, consistency and answers. If you've ever asked yourself "How do I get to the next level in my life", we're here for you!
Our goal at NLU is to help you uncover the habits to build unshakable confidence, cultivate a powerful mindset, nurture meaningful relationships, overcome limiting beliefs, create an amazing family life, set and achieve transformative goals, embrace consistency, recognize your self-worth, and ultimately create the fulfillment and success you desire. Let's level up your health, wealth and love!
Next Level University
#1591 - 1 SUPER Powerful Question To Ask Yourself When You’re Overwhelmed
In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to find ourselves overwhelmed by the sheer volume of tasks and responsibilities that demand our attention. In this episode, Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros delved into this feeling of being inundated, which can lead to a sense of paralysis, where the uncertainty of where to begin or what to focus on prevents us from taking action. Moreover, it is possible to navigate this overwhelm by employing specific strategies that can bring clarity and empower us to act decisively.
Links mentioned:
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700
Book Club Registration:
https://zoom.us/meeting/register/tJMkcuiupjIqE9QlkptiKDQykRtKyFB5Jbhc#/registration
______________________
NLU is far more than just a podcast, and we have so many more resources to help you achieve your goals and dreams.
For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇
Website 💻 http://www.nextleveluniverse.com
_______________________
Any of these communities or resources are FREE to join and consume
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700
Next Level 5 To Thrive (free course) - https://bit.ly/3xffver
Next Level U Book Club - https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/next-level-book-club/
Next Level Monthly Meetup: https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/monthly-meetups/
_______________________
We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email.
Instagram 📷
Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/
Facebook ✍
Alan: https://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros
Kevin: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.palmieri.90/
Email 💬
Kevin@nextleveluniverse.com
Alan@nextleveluniverse.com
_______________________
Show notes:
(2:20) One Thing vs. Nine
(6:27) Unlock the breakthrough
(9:21) Two formulas
(11:39) Identifying and rectifying the sources
(14:34) Tarryn, host of The Business Of Happiness podcast, shares her wonderful experience with Kevin and the Next Level Podcast Solutions team.
(15:26) Multipliers
(17:42) Certainty vs Uncertainty
(20:30) Manufactured or Genuine
(28:15) Outro
Next level nation. Welcome back to another episode of next level university, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. We hope you enjoyed yesterday's episode, episode number 1590. Another thing Alan and myself are polar opposites. With today for episode number 1591, wild will hit 1600 next week.
Speaker 1:One super powerful question to ask yourself when you're overwhelmed. I was on the Zoom machine today with a client and we were talking about podcasting. But we very rarely actually talk about podcasting. My podcast coaching is all over the place. Sometimes we talk about relationships, other times we talk about leadership. You never know. You never know what topic will get pulled out of the bag of topics.
Speaker 1:And this is the first time I've seen this client in the new year and I said catch me up, what's going on? And they said oh man, there's so much going on. I'm super overwhelmed. This has to change and this has to change and I have to do this and I have to do this and I got sick at the beginning of the year and and all this stuff. And I Don't know about you, alan, I'm sure you probably have a similar Process or a similar way it happens. It'll make sense when I explain it with this client. It's very easy. Things just kind of come to me and then we have a conversation about it and usually things just work out really well.
Speaker 1:I don't really prep, I don't. I just go in and we have a conversation and then I try to just use my intuition and I lean that way Into my intuition, pop this question, ask this question this is it. This will. This will help us. It was. It's really two questions.
Speaker 1:What are your current 10 out of 10 certainties, the things that you are 100% certain in, you have hyper focus on, you know they're fine, you're not worried about them, oh, them at all. And what are the zero out of 10s? What are the things that you have? Probably what it sounded like as well to this client what are the things that you have zero out of 10 certainty? You feel like the floor might fall from underneath you and we sat with it and she said okay, interesting, let me. Let me think about that for a second. I haven't really thought about that. And then she started off rattling 10 out of 10. This, this is a decision I need to make. This is a decision I need to make. This has to happen on this date. All right, cool, and just listen. Okay, what are your zeros? And I think the only zero was I Don't know how to do it yet the uncertainty was how to execute, not what to execute on.
Speaker 1:So this person at the beginning of the call Definitely was more overwhelmed or felt more overwhelmed than they actually needed to be. By the end of the call, they had a really good understanding that you're really good in nine out of ten places. You're certain. You know exactly what you're doing. The one thing is you just didn't know how to Execute that thing. All right, cool, let's look at the strategy and then you'll be off to the races when we're overwhelmed. I think it's again. We've done many episodes and overwhelmed, but I think one of the reasons is we're focused on the, the smaller portion of things. We're focused on the one thing we don't know, rather than the nine things we do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, definitely and for a lot of times, or for a lot of us and a lot of the time that can cause Hesitation, that can cause procrastination, that can cause some self-doubt, and then it usually results in somebody not taking action and then you don't get the credit for doing the nine things you actually know you should do. Is this weird thing? It's this, it's this one screw that we have to screw in that actually helps us screw in the other nine. But if you don't screw it in, everything kind of falls. So I wanted to do an episode on that because I thought I know, alan, I'll have a unique perspective on that.
Speaker 1:But whether you're watching or listening the, the early next level nugget is where do you have ten out of ten certainty? For me, I have ten out of ten certainty. Alan and I are gonna do three episodes tonight and then we'll do however many we need to to get through the week and that's gonna happen. I'm not worried about that at all. Where do you have zero percent certainty, alan and I? We're talking about a book Last night that I may or may not write. Oh yeah, I don't have zero. The podcast playbook.
Speaker 2:Actually, we'll see.
Speaker 1:I don't know the name, the podcast. We'll see.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I exist, the one and only Kevin Paul.
Speaker 1:I don't know if it exists perhaps ghost writer. We'll see.
Speaker 2:You know, we're gonna see what happens you used to ghost ride the whip and now you're gonna be the guy who has a ghost writer and Makes the stuff happen.
Speaker 1:We're gonna see we're gonna see what happens. I don't know yet. I don't have ten out of ten uncertain.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't have ten out of ten certainty.
Speaker 1:I don't know how this even humanly possible for me by this, by the date we have determined, july 1st.
Speaker 1:So even if you, even if you, sense the energy With the way I said the first one, we're gonna record three episodes today. We'll record however, however many we need I don't speak to see my life However many we need to get through the week. When it comes to the book, I have very, very, very low certainty, which means I'm probably not gonna do small behaviors that would help me get more certainty. Luckily, you helped me with it. So talk well, we talk about what we're talking about here.
Speaker 2:We, we at least created certainty around the outline. Yes, so for those of you who don't know, kev has a A. We created a pyramid of you know, foundation all the way up. Of course it was a pyramid, yeah, of course. And the fundamentals of how to start, grow, scale, monetize a podcast, and each one had we the outline is those ten chapters. So there's an introduction, there's ten chapters, there's a Conclusion, and then each of those ten chapters that are sandwiched within the intro and the conclusion have three sub chapters, and so the outline is done. So you have certainty on the outline, I have certainty on the outline, and that's basically it. Yeah, that's. I would say that's it. No other certainty whatsoever none, yet None yet none, yet, none, yet.
Speaker 2:Okay, this concept. I do this in coaching constantly. Two things I want to share that I think are really valuable. One is the metaphor of the dialing in the lock. So a lot of people come to me and they think that they need to start from scratch and they think that they're lost and struggling, overwhelmed, and they think, okay, I don't know any of the numbers in the lock, so imagine, like a six. What's a good example of this? Okay, imagine your iPhone or your android and there's a pin and the pin is six digits. I think you can choose four or six, I don't. I think I choose four, but anyways, there's six digits. A lot of people come to me and say I don't have any of the digits. Help me, what's, what are the digits, when in reality, they actually have a lot dialed in. They just need a couple Numbers left. They need one. I'm looking for the one digit You're missing to unlock the iPhone or to unlock the breakthrough.
Speaker 2:That's always the goal and, to your point, kev, you mentioned trusting your intuition. That's really what it is. I get on the Call and last year I used to ask for intentions and I used to have people that I coach, come with an intention. I stopped doing that in 2024 because I want to trust my brain and my intuition to come up with it. If what you wanted was what you needed, you'd already have it, type of thing. Okay. So we get on the call, I say, catch me up. And they just start talking About everything going on in their life and all of a sudden there's this moment where it's like boom, I know what we have to do, we have to work on this, and a lot of times it's actually a courageous moment for me personally, because I don't necessarily want to share this. So I was coaching someone earlier today and I had to tell her that she was very naive, and not from a negative, detrimental, mean place, but from a that. Was that True or false? You were really naive to let that person back into your life. She said true. I said, okay, why? Now it's going to the why.
Speaker 2:So anyways, to bring it back to the certainty thing, a lot of times, to Kevin's point, you have nine things that you're certain about and you're focused entirely on the one that you're completely uncertain about, which is keeping you sort of lost and outside of momentum. There's these two little formulas that I use. One is called the downward spiral of failure, the other one is called the upward spiral of success. I've blogged about this. Very, very simple, kevin, see me do this on coaching calls, team calls, department meetings Okay.
Speaker 2:Less certainty creates less action, creates less growth, which creates what? Less certainty. So less certainty creates less action, creates less growth, which creates less certainty. Another way to think of this is you don't believe in yourself, so you take no action. And then, when you take no action, you don't grow, and when you don't grow, you believe in yourself even less. Okay, what we need to do with that downward spiral of failure? Kevin calls it the confidence conundrum you don't believe in yourself, therefore you take no action. Therefore you get no feedback, therefore you believe in yourself even less type of thing. Okay, so that's called being stuck. In order to shift that into the upward spiral of success, you need three things you need clarity, you need competence and you need confidence.
Speaker 2:And the way that you do that believe it or not is actually facing uncertainty. And I do this on department meetings. All the time I say what are the sources of uncertainty? So it'll be our production team Shadow to Ron, me, ron and Kev Christina Okay, what's everyone's sources of uncertainty? And Kev will say, honestly, I'm a little uncertain about X, y, z. Ron will say I'm a little bit uncertain about ABC, and Christina will say I'm uncertain about W. I don't know. You know what I'm saying. Usually I'm a little uncertain about KEV.
Speaker 1:That's usually what it is. I'm a little uncertain about Kev Kev.
Speaker 2:I'm a little, a lot of times yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm uncertain about Kev, and here's all we do on those sessions. My goal is to figure out how to mitigate the sources of uncertainty. So every call my clients will say I feel so energized, I feel so ready, I feel so inspired. It's really just identifying and rectifying sources of uncertainty. And so everyone out there listening or watching to this, watching to this, we're in trouble. Anyone out there watching or listening to this? There you go.
Speaker 2:What are the sources of uncertainty other than whether or not you want to consistently listen to us anymore after this episode? But what are the sources of uncertainty in your life? Is it finances that you're most uncertain about? Is it your relationship that you're most uncertain about? Is it your fitness regimen that you're most uncertain about? And it can be really annoying to constantly look at where you're uncertain, because at first it creates what? More uncertainty, more pain, more overwhelm. But ironically and this is the funny, comical part of life that sucks focusing on the uncertainty is the only way to overcome it. Otherwise you keep avoiding it, keep avoiding it, keep avoiding it, which we've all done and we all do called procrastination, and it makes us what? More uncertain, more uncertain, more uncertain. So it's death by a thousand cuts instead of one painful moment of. Okay, let's look at this and let's figure out how to get clear on what to do about it.
Speaker 1:This would be an extra next level nugget. I don't know. I've never verbalized this. This is the first time I've ever thought of it. I don't know how it'll land. If it will land, I think of it as uncertainty is a multiplier that pushes things over the edge, so to speak. So think of yourself. If you are certain of nine things and uncertain of one thing, how much does that affect you? I was going to use the analogy or the example of baseball, just because it's easy to use numbers that way. Again, you might not play, you may have never played that sport. Think of your own unique thing. But I like to think of it from if I went up to bat three times, let's say four times and I got I like to think of that sport as the sport of anxiety.
Speaker 2:Baseball yeah, because there's so much you can't make an error ever on defense, yeah, there's a lot going on and on offense. You're basically going to strike out 70% of the time You're not strike out.
Speaker 1:get out. You're going to strike out 70% of the time, but you won't be safe 70% of the time.
Speaker 2:I've coached a lot of baseball players. I'm telling you there's a correlation of massive anxiety with failure and that sport. I'm just saying it's fair?
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, it's fair. It's you and a pitcher, and then the best person wins the whole team lying on you and the best person wins If you drop the ball or miss the ball, you basically lose the game for people. Potentially, yeah, potentially.
Speaker 2:Let your entire team and the entire crowd down. I will lose, I will lose my team.
Speaker 1:Thank you. Well, no, because that I don't know. This is the point I was trying to make. If I got three hits out of four at bats, I would probably be upset that one time I didn't get a hit. I think that's potentially good. It can be constructive if you use it the right way. What would your opinion be of yourself in whatever example you're going to use? It might not be baseball or softball or hockey or soccer or basketball or whatever. It might be something completely different. Do you get hijacked by the one loss even though you have nine wins? Do you get hijacked by the two things you did wrong, not the eight things you did incredibly well? That that's really my thought with this, because I think the failures or the uncertainties or the insecurities, those have a multiplier Like well, yeah, I did that really well. But here are the three things I did really wrong. If you're multiplying each of those three things by three, they're not actually three, they're nines, if that makes sense.
Speaker 2:If you do hit the ball three times out of four, you're the best. You're the best. All you do is focus on the miss. You're going to feel the worst. I think that what you should probably try to compare to is the statistics. That's why I love numbers. I just compare to the statistics because if you miss one out of every four, you're still statistically great.
Speaker 1:Yeah, if you miss one out of four, you're the best ever of all time. Yeah, if you hit three out of four, you're batting 750. That's not even a thing. No, no, no, no, I think 400. No one in history no no four. I think the highest ever was four. I believe it was Ted Williams. He batted like 420 or something.
Speaker 2:Nice, nice Baseball analogies, side tangent Kev. I reviewed you and I's first episode and I talked about this and I keep going back. I've been doing a lot of that lately. I watched a video of us and the amount of certainty we used to speak with is fascinating, because it was fake certainty. If you've ever witnessed someone with pretend confidence, I've come down to realize I think that arrogance is pretend certainty. I think it's an energy and I think people can smell bullshit. You and I speak with way less certainty now Well, even this, but yet we're way more certain this episode.
Speaker 1:I would just rather call it out and say I don't really know what's going to happen in this episode, and this might be one of those ones you leave with more questions than you came with, but I don't think that's a bad thing.
Speaker 2:But in the past you and I would have, we would have tried to know it or show that we know it. And again, this was unconscious. It's not like we were consciously trying to be, arrogant by any means.
Speaker 2:But when I look back at those first episodes, it's very clear that you were trying to communicate with a ton of certainty, even though you had very little. And now I think we have way more certainty inside but we're portraying much less on the outside. It's like this weird thing, and what we're really trying to do is just portray the right amount of certainty, and I think that's why we can be playful and joke when we screw up and all that, whereas in the beginning I think that would have actually bothered us. Yeah, so anyway, it's just a little side tangent. So, for those listening or watching, where are you the most certain? Because it's real, you really know what you're doing, you've done it before, you can do it again and you know it. That's bucket one. Bucket two is where are you pretending to be certain when you're not, and it would be vulnerable to admit otherwise, but useful. And then bucket three is which I think is hilarious because I thought it was gonna come. I've done that so many times.
Speaker 1:Those only two buckets, the three things that I suggest, and after I said the first one, it's like oh no, I don't even know if I'm gonna have to make up a second one. I Appreciate the ownership.
Speaker 2:I appreciate the ownership yeah you got.
Speaker 1:This is one of those. This was literally a thought that I had at 2 pm and we're recording this at 4 30 pm, so it's only been two and a half hours. Alan and I have never talked about this before, so it was very it's very fresh. It's a very fresh idea, but I thought it would be valuable. I thought it would be valuable From a self-awareness standpoint, for all of us to sit back and think about it, because I'm I'm very similar I have to have these conversations with myself of Something happens we lose a client or something. It's almost like I'm uncertain of that. I'm uncertain of how that affects all the things. I'm certain and it's something that I'm working on just as much as anybody else can work on it. So I'm practicing it.
Speaker 2:I have a question for you. Yeah, sure, I Think could be wrong, but I want your take on it, honest take. I think you used to and I used to Without knowing I was doing this, without you knowing you were doing this you factor certainty versus Having genuine certainty.
Speaker 1:Talk about it. I would argue I probably knew I was doing it. I Don't think it was unconscious. I think I was aware that I was trying to seem more certain or confident than I actually was. But I think that's In retrospect. I think that's what I had to do to get through you and I. I had no business Interval. I didn't feel like I had any business interviewing Laurie harder 34 episodes in that. I Didn't feel like I had any business interviewing certain people that early. I had to pretend I was more certain than I was. I Felt like I had to. Now I think I probably could have just been funnier and More curious and more myself, but at the time you don't really know that.
Speaker 1:So yeah, and when you look back at old content, that's clear. Yeah, I would argue you less than I. I Think you had it less than I did.
Speaker 2:I think when I get triggered From other people's insecurity or uncertainty, I get really. I think my insecurity comes from being disliked. So if I felt like I wasn't gonna fit in or belong or or I was gonna be villainized or disliked, I would. I would puffer fish and manufacture certainty when in reality, I was actually really vulnerable inside. I was feeling really vulnerable because I was afraid to be not liked and, instead of owning that and sharing that, I was uncertain or scared.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I think I would manufacture certainty and pretend that I which which I think came off as arrogance Unintentionally, so I'm starting to figure that out, but anyways. So for the listeners, that's hopefully a golden nugget for you of a A lot of the people out there that are manufacturing certainty. Don't feel bad if. If you feel less certain than other people, because a lot of that is fake. You're not. There's no one, I'm telling you. There's no one, who's fully certain about everything. There's no one. We coach a ton of people, so the coolest part about being a coach, I'm telling you, it's just all the perspectives. You just know that everyone's uncertain about something. They're just not all uncertain about the same thing.
Speaker 1:Well, and the other thing is, if you've ever heard Alan or I say something that made you think God, that was a good thought. I'm sure we've had a few. Hopefully, in the 1600 episodes I hope there's been a couple we're. A lot of the episodes we do comes from conversations that we had behind the scenes, so there's, it's always. No, I think we have the best job in the world because we get to talk about deep stuff and we get to work on ourselves every day for a living as wild.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that I agree with thousand percent, the fact that we get to work on ourselves and help others do the same best job in the world, I would say so. Hardest, one of the hardest, I think. Definitely challenging, yeah, one of the most difficult to sell definitely challenging for sure it was joking about that earlier.
Speaker 2:I know we got a jump, but I said you know the person that I said I was scared. I admitted I said I'm scared to tell you this but I know. You know that I'm trying to help you. That was you know. I think you were pretty naive there and trust me mr Naive over here.
Speaker 2:Right, so I get it. I own it too. But this person is coaching with me. Coaching is the hardest thing to sell. Hey, come, pay me to basically have you look at all of your inadequacies. And it's more than that, obviously. I'm an inspired, motivate, educate. But it sucks to look at all your weaknesses, all your blind spots, all your inadequacies, but you actually build certainty with that.
Speaker 2:When you look at the castle and you go, oh, there's a hole in the moat and a hole in the moat, there's a hole in the castle, there's a bridge on that moat or whatever. There's vulnerabilities. And then you shear them up. All of a sudden you will have real certainty instead of manufactured certainty. And then, after that, what else can you do? What else can you do? What else can you do? And then you get to a next level pun intended and then it reveals more blind spots. And then you shear those up, and then you get to a next level, and then it reveals more blind spots. And it goes on and on, and on, and on and on. And the higher you climb, the more levels you go to, the more you realize oh crap, we need more oxygen tanks in the climbing a mountain analogy? We didn't. It's like oh my snow pants have a hole in them. Crap that kind of thing. And you gotta go back sometimes to the previous level and retool.
Speaker 1:Very clear to me that you did not take medieval architecture in your college years, sir.
Speaker 2:No, definitely not. The moat is a hole.
Speaker 1:If there's a hole in the moat, you're going to the center of the earth. You know what I'm saying? All right, we're gonna get out of here before things get super, super weird. Next level nation. If you have not yet joined our private Facebook group, please do so. One of the hardest parts of growth is doing it alone. Growth is hard enough, but nevermind if you're going at it all by yourself. Surround yourself with like-minded people who want growth as much as you do. You can be vulnerable, you can be authentic, you can be yourself in our Facebook group. Next Level Nation Link will be in the show notes, as always.
Speaker 2:On YouTube. I'm showing the book, the book For Book Club the courage to be disliked. I don't know how to pronounce these names. I will try Ichiro Kashimi and Fumitaki Koga. This book was recommended to me by Jenna. Jenna's a community member, past team member. Shout out to Jenna. And it is awesome. Great book. We're gonna do five chapters a week. They are short, short, short chapters. If we did, I think there's 50 chapters in this book, but they're really short. And this book is built on this really cool idea where there's this wise old philosopher who has studied psychology and all that and there's this young youth who is trying to learn and is basically challenging this wise older person's thinking, and what comes of that is just awesome. So join us on Book Club. I'm super pumped about this one. This is definitely different than the ones we've done in the past. The link to register will be in the show notes and you don't have to be having read the book or not. You can join anytime and listen in, or you can participate as much as you'd like. Book.
Speaker 1:Club is a party. From what I've heard, it's good, real good. I can hear the music over the fence. You know what I mean. I can hear the music every once in a while. Beach ball pops over to my side of the fence, I pop it, throw in the trash.
Speaker 2:screw you, you're not getting it back Book Club is the real deal.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying it's not, I'm saying quite literally I had a client recently.
Speaker 2:I said what's made the biggest difference? Because she said 10 out of 10 fulfilled. And when I first started coaching her years ago, she said four and she said Book Club. I was like, oh my God, that's awesome. I'm gonna need you to record that. Yeah, right.
Speaker 1:I support it. Put it on a billboard. Put it on a billboard, all right. Tomorrow for episode number 1,592. Is your vision and your goals aligned? Alan and I were talking. Is it? Are your vision and your goals aligned or is? I think it's is, but it sounds weird when you say it. So if it's grammatically incorrect I apologize. But yeah, that's what we're gonna talk about tomorrow. Almost all of this week's episodes are from today, whether it's coaching sessions or yesterday, when Alan and I were in person for the entire day. So this week should be very aligned, probably very connected episodes would be my guess. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.
Speaker 2:Talk to you soon, next sub-nation.
