Next Level University

#1743 - How Often Should You Revisit Your Past?

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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In this heartfelt episode, Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros delve into the balance between nostalgia and growth. Reflecting on the journey from simpler times to achieving great success, they explore the duality of longing for the past and embracing the future. Tune in for an engaging conversation that will leave you reflecting on your journey of growth and the nostalgia of simpler times. Whether you are striving for personal success or seeking to understand the balance between past and present, this topic is filled with valuable lessons and heartfelt discussions.

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Show notes:
(2:27) Take a trip back
(5:37) The five buckets framework
(7:50) The value of nostalgia
(12:20) Personal stories and reflections
(18:12) Meet like-minded people and jumpstart your journey to ac

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🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Speaker 1

Next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. We hope you enjoyed yesterday's episode, episode number 1,742. We're going to work right through this the three types of clarity. The reason we're laughing is because I said something funny and usually when we finish an episode we shut off the audio and video and then Alan and I will tease each other, but we left the audio and video on because we were recording back-to-back episodes. Yeah, it's a whole thing Today.

Speaker 1

For episode number 1,743, how often should you revisit your past? I wanted to talk about nostalgia in Freestyle Friday. Alan wanted to talk about classic rock and alternative rock and then he wanted to talk about sleep and testosterone and everything under the sun. So I said, hey, can we do an episode? Can we do an episode on nostalgia? Because, number one, I think we I think I'm probably guilty of in the past equating nostalgia to bad Because we have the five buckets we talk about and you can, if you want to go through those, you can as the framework, jeff, but one of the buckets is nostalgia.

Speaker 2

So the five buckets.

Speaker 1

I'll let you tell the story because I don't really know. I know how it came about, but you remember how, like we had one, and then yeah, bernard, and yeah, you could tell the story a lot of old episodes coming back.

Speaker 2

I love it old frameworks because and by old I don't mean bad, they're great. So in the early days of the hyperconscious podcast, kevin and I did a lot of traveling. We went up and down the california coast and we did events and we went to Arizona and Florida and all kinds of stuff.

Speaker 1

New Jersey.

Speaker 2

A lot of exploring New Jersey, canada, toronto. Yeah, we've been traveling. We used to travel a lot, and that was when we were doing in-person interviews Before COVID. We went fully virtual after that. So, anyways, we were in. We were at a Brendan Burchard event again, just like the last episode. I'm pretty sure we started there and that's. I don't know if it was the same one, because we did in 2019, we did High Performance Academy and then we did Influencer, which I think was the next year.

Speaker 1

This one, I believe, was Arizona.

Speaker 2

Which is Influencer?

Speaker 1

Arizona was the first one.

Take a trip back

Speaker 2

Because San Diego was the second one Was the second one. Okay, so which one is the one?

Speaker 1

The first one. The first one, okay.

Speaker 2

All right. So in Arizona we went to High Performance Academy. Yeah yeah, this is turning out to be an excellent episode.

Speaker 1

We got this. Yeah, it will be yeah.

Speaker 2

It is what it is. So we're in arizona and we're at a bernard bouchard event and he talked about the three buckets, and one of them was a growth bucket. The two buckets he didn't have were the ones we created, which was wisdom bucket and mentee bucket. So he did have the nostalgia bucket, he had the maintenance bucket and he had the growth bucket, and his hypothesis was that your life will succeed to the extent that you fill the growth bucket. He also has an app called Growth Day. He's big into personal development. Okay, awesome. So then we fly from Arizona to or drive.

Speaker 1

This is turning into a hell of a story. We flew from Arizona to Boston at the end, but wait first we went to Steve's Place.

Speaker 2

Steve's Place is in Arizona. Okay, well then, we drove from the venue to Steve's Place, the Infinity Pool. I'm having trouble telling the story because this is a long time ago.

Speaker 1

I kicked it to you because you're supposed to have the master memory and you seem to have forgotten. The whole thing has left you.

Speaker 2

This has been a long day.

Speaker 1

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2

Seven episodes in a row, and last week was tough. We had an event yesterday, so, all right, I got this.

Speaker 1

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2

High Performance Academy, Brendan Burchard. Boom, three buckets. You've got the nostalgia bucket, the maintenance bucket and the growth bucket. Then we drive to interview a man named Steve Ryder, overlooking Arizona, Scottsdale, Arizona, and there was three security gates to get there Infinity pool, big, beautiful mansion.

Speaker 1

It was beautiful, it was awesome, great interview.

Speaker 2

And at the end I talked about the buckets that Brendan talked about at the event, so excited I was learning about them. He said, well, he's missing a bucket. I was like, what do you mean? He's the wisdom bucket. You need a bucket of people that are mentors, 10, 20, 30 years ahead of you. Like, I would consider myself in your wisdom bucket. Alan got it, boom, awesome.

Speaker 2

Then, on the flight home to boston, kev came up with the mentee bucket because he's like well, okay, we've got the nostalgia bucket and I'll go through them now. The nostalgia bucket is people from your past high school friends, kids you grew up with that kind of thing family. Then you've got maintenance bucket, which is you have a lot in common but not everything, and it's certainly not into growth. And then you've got the mentee bucket, which are people that are into growth but they're your way ahead of them, okay. So when I first started bodybuilding with Kev, he was ahead of me. Okay, but I was ahead of him in corporate, he was ahead of me in bodybuilding. So we were in each other's mentee bucket, so to speak. Then you've got the growth bucket, which is peak performance partners. These are your peers. These are. Kevin and I, both in podcasting, are kind of on the same level and same level, and when I podcast with other podcasters that are new, I can tell that I that I can't play at the same level. Although this episode is not a testament to that, what's not indicative, yeah.

The five buckets framework

Speaker 2

And then the last one is the wisdom bucket, which is people that are 10, 20, 30 years ahead of you, ahead of you and I. I had dinner every weekend, every friday night, for like a long time, with a man named dr robert scott who we interviewed for one of the I don't remember what episode, but he was in his 70s and he was teaching me a lot. He was in my wisdom bucket. I had another, the ceo. I have another mentor who runs uh, is the ceo of a robotics company still actually a different one now but he, I would get dinner with him and I would ask him questions like what's the hardest part about being a ceo? And I learned a lot. I learned a ton from the wisdom bucket. But now the the point is is that we called the nostalgia bucket the nostalgia bucket. I guess it was brendan burchard who did, and I think that we have an association with the nostalgia bucket that maybe is less positive than maybe it should be.

Speaker 1

I would say that's accurate, because even when we talk about it, we talk about how it's. You're going back to old world and you're kind of going back to a world that no longer serves you, but you're going back to visit people that you maybe miss. And my thought was so this came because I went down to Allen's and then we went to our Next Level Hope Foundation event, and when I go down to Uxbridge I usually plan for like an extra 10 or 15 minutes and I'll just drive around town. I'll drive by the middle school and I'll drive by the elementary school and I'll drive by the baseball fields and all that stuff, and it always I don't know it like inspires me, but it makes me sad too, but also fires me up.

Speaker 2

Can we go? I don't know what all those emotions, yeah.

The value of nostalgia

Speaker 1

Why, I don't know. I think I mean, the last time I was driving around there was the last time I felt lost, the last time when I last lived in Uxbridge. It's when I had just broken up with one of my partners and I moved in with family friends, when I was staying in that bedroom and then from there I got my own place. I ended up getting my own place and then I ended up moving to New Hampshire.

Speaker 2

So why? So it inspired you. The emotions you said was I was inspired, but also sad. But also, what Fired up? Fired up. Okay, let's go through each what inspires you about it, because there's the value of nostalgia right there, I mean.

Speaker 1

Yeah, okay.

Speaker 2

I think it's super valuable.

Speaker 1

But I do think it's important to figure out what it is, what's underneath it. So I appreciate that.

Speaker 2

And the reason why we associate the nostalgia bucket as maybe more negative or less constructive is because usually that's the bucket that's too full yeah and and now that we have so much wisdom bucket and growth bucket and mentee bucket, for us it might actually be not enough in the maintenance there is very little nostalgia bucket, very, very, very little, which is great.

Speaker 1

Very, very, very little which is great. It's by design. It's by design. But what was the first one that I said fired up Inspired, Inspired.

Speaker 2

You said inspired, sad and fired up.

Speaker 1

Inspired because when you go back to where you like this whole thing started, everything seems a little bit smaller and everything seems a little bit smaller and everything seems a little bit more simple. And I was driving by people's houses and it was like that person went down a really dangerous path and I don't know where. I don't even know what they're doing, I don't know where they are, I don't know what they're up to. A lot of people I knew, people that I dated, good friends of mine, people that I just knew of. A lot of them went in very different paths and it just inspires me that we didn't and other people didn't.

Speaker 1

But that just going back to where this all started and remembering how insignificant I felt and remembering how hopeless I felt and remembering all the mistakes I made, that that I mean that's it's always going to be a big piece of who I am. And like going, driving through the center of town and just seeing the town square, like the bank. I used to go to the subway, that I used to go to Harry's Pizza, that I used to go to it, just subway that I used to go to Harry's Pizza, that I used to go to it, just reminds me of oh Harry's Pizza.

Speaker 2

Man Still great, yeah it just reminds me of all that stuff.

Speaker 1

So I think the inspiration is because I never thought I was going to evolve into anything. And now when I go back there it's like, oh, you've come a long way since you were living here.

Speaker 2

That Okay, so that's inspired. Next would be sad.

Speaker 1

This one might be hard for you, but I think it's important I think it just brings up all the old feelings of not not enoughness, driving by the schools that I used to go to, like that and just remembering how again alan and i's high school experiences were were different. But driving by the old high school, like I remember just feeling like an outsider I we were joking recently about going to lunch and just hoping someone that you knew was at the same lunch as you so you didn't have to sit at the table by yourself.

Speaker 2

That high school I felt like a giant loser in high school same I felt like a giant until senior year I didn't feel that way at all. But I would say freshman and sophomore, for sure junior and senior. I felt like I really came out of my shell again. But yeah, freshman and sophomore year were for me were just awful. Years at home and in high school were awful, yeah yeah they were, they were dark, uh, and again, not, not, not dark, dark, but they were. Yeah, yeah, they were pretty bad, yeah, they were pretty bad. I'm not gonna sugarcoat it, yeah, at home.

Speaker 2

And yeah it wasn't good, it was not.

Speaker 1

Not a fan not a fan, well don't? You? Don't get any of that when you drive around.

Personal stories and reflections

Speaker 2

I do. I definitely do when I go on other shows. This is actually really hard for me, but I have to have courage. So I'm just going to just understand that this is a blanket statement, but I playfully refer to where Kevin and I grew up, as the Boulevard of Broken Dreams no-transcript. And and again, relative to where we are now and the way we think. Now, I'm not trying to be unkind, I, but I also can't dance around my truth. My truth is we grew up in a small minded town and it's a small town and it's that's okay. I'm not, I'm not. I think there's a lot of really good things. I think oxbridge is gorgeous Uh, the forest that I live in. I mean, dude, there's some places around here.

Speaker 2

We did a photo shoot. So for anyone listening, who does also listen to conscious couples podcast, emilia is working on a new intro, outro and intro, because the old one is literally us talking from a teleprompter. It might as well be it was hi. Welcome to the conscious couples podcast. We are together and we want you to be together too. I'm'm joking, that's not actually what it is, but it's brutal, especially on YouTube. We're looking like not at all at the camera, rookies, but anyways. So she's redoing it and we did this photo shoot. That's gorgeous.

Speaker 2

I mean that's in Uxbridge, the place that we were. When you see this forest and some of the B-roll that we got that in uxbridge when emilia first found this house, this condo. We're in a beautiful condo complex. I'm so grateful it's. It's unbelievable here. But I remember being like, yep, that's the spot, we're in our own. I actually was showing christina our coo because we did the whole google earth thing. Kev's like oh, so this is what you do on the chief officer's calls without me. I went to to Google Earth and saw her where she lives. I do this often actually not only with clients and team members, but I like to see you can literally just use Google Earth and go and look at someone's house.

Speaker 2

I mean it's a little bit alarming and also awesome, and so we showed each other context, because they hear stories about where I grew up and the town I'm in and so now they get context to it. So it's anyways. When emilia first showed the home, when we were looking at homes, I was like, yep, that's the spot. It's far enough away to where we are in the forest and and have solitude where it's not city and it's beautiful forest, it's. The quarries is wonderful, but it's close enough to the highway where we're right smack dab in the middle of western providence, so we can. I mean, there's a lot you can do here. It's great, and I'm a big fan of new england anyway, even though a lot of people hate the winter, I actually like it but anyways. So why was I talking about that? Yeah, so it's.

Speaker 2

It's very challenging to to share your truth without offending anyone. My truth is it is a small town with mostly a small-minded town. Now, I also love and appreciate my upbringing in so many regards to like. Some of the teachers were unbelievable, some of them were not. Some of the role models were good, some of them were not. Some of the role models were good, some of them were definitely not, and everything's different based on the perspective. So all of us who have gone back to our high school or have gone back to our old home I mean, even when you and I fished a couple father's days ago at the home I grew up in I mean it felt smaller to me too. It's also gorgeous, though. It's beautiful.

Speaker 1

I think I miss it. It, I think I miss it. I think that's one of the reasons I'm sad is because I miss it you miss the simpler times I miss the simple yeah, I miss the simpler times life used to be.

Speaker 1

It used to be more challenging in many ways, but it used to be easier in other ways too. Definitely, and I think I have that it's's like. Oh yeah, I remember I drove by my first serious girlfriend's house I didn't this time the last time I came down and I used to be over there all the time and we would jump on the trampoline in the back and we would. I remember me and my friends would literally just go for rides and we would. There would be five of us in five cars just driving around the town, just wasting gas, because that's that's just what we did yeah, when you first get your license.

Speaker 1

It's such a yeah, it's such a thing that that's where I lived when I first got my license. A lot of my firsts happened there First job, all of it. First job, first girlfriend, all of that stuff, first car All of that stuff happened there.

Speaker 2

Virginity yes, that is also.

Speaker 1

The first podcast episode ever. It wasn't in Uxbridge, but it was close.

Speaker 2

My man, danny, danny, danny g no, that was in new hampshire.

Speaker 1

No, no.

Speaker 2

The youtube remember when I was on your youtube channel that was in that's only 10 minutes away, so I connect that to uxbridge so, yeah, I think it makes me, it gives me all those things, because it brings me back to a simpler time.

Speaker 2

So so when you say sad because it makes me sad too, Everything's opposite for Kevin and I. That's why it's so cool to learn both ends of everything. For me, it's sad because I'm sad for the people who get stuck there and who will never experience what we've experienced. That makes me sad. For you it's sad. It makes me sad For you, it's sad. It makes you sad that you'll never have simpler times again.

Speaker 1

I won't say never, but yeah.

Speaker 2

I mean, you never will.

Speaker 1

The pressure is more.

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Speaker 2

I talked to you about a book called Flowers for Algernon. I'll go quick with this. We've been watching the Planet of the apes movies the newest ones and they essentially are trying to cure alzheimer's and they end up creating this virus that improves brain function and that apes end up getting smarter. It's a whole thing. It's. They're actually phenomenal. Films like two and I mean you want to talk about a movie that sounds dumb. That's actually magnificent. This is the one great, but anyways. So we just finished the whole first trilogy and there's another trilogy, that's we saw the first one, kingdom of the Planet of the Apes. It was just. I think it's still in theaters. Actually it's awesome in my opinion, but anyways. So the book Flowers for Algernon is essentially a book that's written in the first person from someone who's mentally challenged. I don't know if that's the proper term.

Speaker 1

Mentally challenged.

Speaker 2

Developmental disabilities Okay.

Speaker 1

Yeah.

Speaker 2

Cognitively developmental disability. Okay so, and then they are given a drug that makes them smarter over time. And it's such a fascinating study. It's hard to read because it's written terribly at first and then it gets better over time, but it's kind of like a journal entry book of as algernon gets smarter and smarter, and smarter, he realizes that all of the people that he thought he was having fun with were actually making fun of him.

Speaker 2

It's the ignorance is bliss thing. You'll never be ignorant like that again. You'll never be able to enjoy those simple things to this in the same way as you did back then, and neither will I. And that's the duality of, and the paradox of of growing and evolving. Is you kind, by the time you achieve the things that you wanted, you won't value them in the same way. You'll still value them, but you won't value them in the same way.

Speaker 2

I wanted to talk about this quickly because I told Kev this is about nostalgia and it's very in alignment, because I remember it was a couple nights ago, last week, so it was last week, four or five nights ago, maybe this. But I went in emilia's office and I said because it was a me day, and I said I just want to talk to you about this. It's weird. I I'm gonna go back and watch. I didn't want her to come into my office and see some naked girl on my screen, because that's just ridiculous. So I watched american pie again and it came out in 1999 and many of you listening will recognize that. Many of you won't, because it's just a stupid movie.

Ignorance is bliss

Speaker 2

But when I was a kid I watched that movie and I remember my best friend at the time's dad said you should not be watching that movie. And now I get his perspective, because my sister was three years older and, honestly, even she should have shouldn't have been watching it, probably, and so I needed to go back. I told kevin this behind the scenes. I said I have to go back and I need to re-watch the movie so that I can understand what I, what was influencing me back then. Is it racist, is it sexist, is it, is it alarming? Like what was influencing me? And I I remember watching the movie and I told kev. I said it wasn't actually as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was still probably, for an 11 year old, not great, okay, but and and I said this to kevin, this is just my truth and, again, please don't villainize me for this, but the girls are not nearly as hot as I thought they were when I was a kid.

Speaker 2

When I was a kid, those girls were like the unattainable. Oh my god, these are, and, quite frankly, I consider Emilia far more attractive than anyone in that movie by far. And that's my life now and I'm so grateful. But will I ever? Will I ever value these things that I've achieved in the exact same way as I did back when I first dreamed of them up? And the answer is no. I mean, dude, if I had told you when you were 15 years old, hey, you're going to be making 400 000 a year with alan lazarus in your own business, right, half a million dollars coming up on it you'd be like, oh my god, that would be unbelievable. And the truth is it is unbelievable.

Speaker 2

Yeah, for sure, but it's not what you thought it was going to be.

Speaker 1

Well, I don't think anything is.

Speaker 2

That's kind of my point.

Speaker 1

Yeah, I don't think anything is. I think that's the reason I like Sunday so much is because it's light. It's not. You have to be here at this time and this moment for this amount of time. Nah, you have to be here at this time in this moment for this amount of time. That it's like. I love sundays. I love mondays too, but I love sundays because it's different yeah, and that meant that goes into the responsibility thing.

Speaker 2

Like you and I have taken not only responsibility for our own life but responsibility for our family and then responsibility for our extended family in some extents, and then responsibility for the nlu company some extents, and then responsibility for the NLU company, nlu team, nlu community and responsible for changing the world in our own unique way. And that is heavy as hell.

Speaker 2

That is heavy, but that's how you grow and evolve. And so, if you can reorient yourself and I heard a quote recently that I thought was really powerful which is how do you aim at the highest possible good that you can achieve and then reorient your entire life toward that greater good and take on the responsibility in advance for doing that? And there's nothing better you can do with your life Now, again, that is what I believe to be true. I do believe fulfillment comes from doing all you can with all you have, toward a meaningful thing. I think most people are fulfilled, achieving meaningful progress toward meaningful goals for a meaningful purpose.

Speaker 2

You know, this episode is one pebble toward a milestone, toward a goal, toward a dream and the purpose underneath it right.

Speaker 2

So it's meaningful progress toward a meaningful goal, toward a milestone, toward a goal, toward a dream and the purpose underneath it right.

The weight of responsibility

Speaker 2

So it's meaningful progress toward a meaningful goal, toward a meaningful purpose, and the meaningful purpose is help people improve their lives and become more successful and fulfilled, because if everyone's more successful and fulfilled and has higher self-belief and self-worth, the whole world becomes a better place, because fulfilled people typically I've never seen a fulfilled person go out of their way to hurt other people and I do believe that's the root cause of all human suffering is people that are deeply unfulfilled. But of course, that's my own unique perspective and that's the mission you and I are on. And so, dude, it's hard for me to go back to movies like that, and I literally walked into Emilia's office 20 minutes in saying saying I don't even want a me date, I don't want to watch this damn movie anymore. I want to hang out with you and can I really go back and enjoy it the same way? And maybe it's different for you, maybe you actually do like to do that more.

Speaker 1

I don't know, I don't like to. No, no, there was a, there was a big to do about a, a show on netflix that's supposed to be super funny and the comedian, shane gillis, he's a like very big comedian and I was like I'll give it a shot, let me see.

Speaker 2

And it's like no, I know, it sucks man yeah, I feel dirty.

Speaker 1

And again, if you watch it you like it shout out to you that's good, good for you. It's just not my cup of tea anymore. One of my favorite shows of all time is was, and really it's not. I don't think I could ever watch it again is Eastbound and Down, and so many of the quotes that I like, the funny quotes that I have come from that movie Come from that movie, come from that series, but it is just too low vibe I just feel dirty.

Speaker 1

Yeah, it's a bad influence. Yes, I would say so, I would.

Speaker 2

And unfortunately a lot of comedy. It's hard to get a good comedy.

Speaker 1

That's not 100 low vibe yeah if you again, I listen to certain music that I'm sure is not a great influence.

Speaker 1

So you do you yeah, it's yeah yeah, it's just not my cup of tea anymore, and I think that is the beauty of going back to the previous episode clarity and being more specific and having less options is, when you have less options, you have to. Really, I will never stop watching mixed martial arts, ever. If I can have my way, I will never, ever, ever stop watching mixed martial arts. But if you said you had to pick between, okay, well, that means you're never going to play video games again. Cool, take them away. That's fine. Mixed martial arts is the thing. That's my R&R Mixed martial arts. You can never watch movies again. Whatever Can't Mixed martial arts. I want to watch mixed martial arts, but I think that just comes from more simplicity, and more simplicity usually comes from less options, and less options come from lack of time Lack of extra time.

Speaker 2

I know we got to jump, yeah, but my alarm just went off. I know you got to jump, but my alarm just went off. I know you got to go because you got to travel tomorrow, bright and early and you want to make sure you have quality time with Taryn before travel. That I do Very important.

Reevaluating influences and simplicity

Speaker 1

And burgers.

Speaker 2

Quality time and burgers. Also burgers For someone who how do I say this? For someone who didn't? I'm just gonna say this kev wanted big goals but didn't know the level of responsibility it was going to take to achieve them. You can't like say, hey, I want to be a multi-millionaire and then like, hang out at the beach. You, you have to take the responsibility for the metrics, habits, habits, tools, tasks, systems, choices, skills, values, resources, awareness, beliefs, environments and influences, standards and potential. Like you can't achieve a new goal without setting a new standard, and you can't set a new standard unless you take responsibility for whatever it takes within your character to get there. Within your character, that's the key right. Doing whatever it takes is actually easy compared to staying in integrity to do it. Um, which is why I talked about that story of stealing sunglasses. I didn't want to talk about that. I just need to, because it's important to know that there are always shortcuts that are never going to fulfill you for sure.

Speaker 2

And that's just a lesson we all have to learn, and I had to learn that too. So anyways, as someone who set these huge results goals, I mean you've set really big results goals. I mean first it was 2 million, then it was 70 million. It's just up, up, up, up and net worth goals and wealth and your own movie theater. You want a car that's 250 grand or whatever it is Like. That's not normal Statistically speaking. Can you explain the responsibility that comes with that? Because I wonder if people would choose differently if they understood this whole ignorance is bliss versus evolution versus nostalgia versus responsibility thing.

Sacrifices for success

Speaker 1

I mean, I think it's just a conversation of how much are you going to have to trade in order to get what you really want? That's really what it is. Yeah and again, this isn't a bad thing. This is what it takes right. This is what I signed up for. If I ever decide I don't want this, I'll talk to Alan and I'll make a different decision, but I don't anticipate that day ever happening. I just you just have to understand that if you want results that aren't typical, your life is not gonna be typical and you're not going to be able to make typical decisions and do typical things. And when I say typical, I'm not speaking down to those. But yeah, I don't go to bachelor parties. I don't really do anything other than podcasts, speak, coach, spend time with Taryn and then spend time with our family.

Speaker 2

But that's minus a couple of the rager weekends you've been enjoying. Yeah, I've had a couple of those, just for the listeners they're like well, I don't know.

Speaker 1

Yeah, yeah, if you just if you just started listening, you probably think I party all the time.

Speaker 2

Those are like the two times put down, a quick 12, or yeah, yeah, the two times in the past X amount of years.

Speaker 1

But here's the truth, though. I shouldn't be doing that, not if it was just about business success. That's a mistake.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 1

That's a mistake. That's the hard part. It's almost like there's always your goals, are always looking down saying like, yeah, you can do it, you can do it. If you want to do it, do it. But just so you know it's going to take you a little bit longer or it's not going to happen, or whatever. This is the analogy I always used to use. Nobody cares if you cheat on your diet.

Speaker 2

Nobody cares If anything. They actually like you more when you do Seriously.

Speaker 1

That's like a thing I used to tell people all the time when I was much more into fitness and doing shows of. People would ask me for advice and they'd say, like I have a birthday coming up and it's really important to me that I be there. And I would literally say this Right now this is the exercise and caloric regimen you're on. Are you okay with getting to?

Speaker 2

your goals later. Later meaning more time it taking more time?

Speaker 1

Yes, it will take you an extra week, hypothetically, if you want to do this, this and this. If so, go ahead. If not, stick to the plan. Yep, that's fine, and it was always so. It's the same thing. I think it's the same thing. So it's the same thing. I think it's the same thing. In some weird land that doesn't exist, that is filled with unicorns and rainbows and pots of gold, you can accomplish all of your goals by sitting around doing nothing. That's not real life.

Speaker 1

And I can tell you I've worked with a lot of people who it looks like that's what they're doing. And it looks like they're getting really good results. They have someone who is paying the bills.

Speaker 2

Just so you know.

Speaker 1

Every time, every time. Oh yeah, my partner makes really good money. Oh, okay, that makes sense. That's why we're just hanging out, and your content is always you hanging out and doing nothing. Okay, cool. That's not going to set you up for success, though, so I don't know if I could eloquently answer the question, other than the fact that you have to be willing to trade in a lot of things that other people won't be willing to trade in because they don't want what you want, and that's okay the three emotions at the beginning that you said were like pointing this at you, sorry, pointing my, pointing my pen at Kev, kev.

Speaker 2

The three things. It was inspired. Yes, it was sad and then it was fired up. What makes you fired up about going back the nostalgia bucket?

Speaker 1

I don't know. I have this like deep-seated, probably not real and maybe partly real, but I'll explain it. That nobody Believed in you Believed in me, yeah, yeah. When I don't think that's fully true, I do believe I was the biggest thing holding me back. I do, I know, because there was a lot of people that always would say they believed in me.

Speaker 2

There was people who thought you'd turn into nothing, though, who didn't give you the time of day, who didn't put respect on it yeah, but I think it's less than most when.

Speaker 1

When you hear most people's stories, it's like I couldn't catch a break. You know, nobody gave me any chances and nobody believed in me, and I don't think that was the case I think it's fair and, again, this is just my perspective.

Speaker 2

So I need to say that I would say it has been interesting for kevin and I to be on this journey.

Speaker 2

There are certain people who value him a lot more than me and there are certain people who value him a lot more than me, and there are certain people who value me a lot more than him. And I would say, statistically speaking, with many exceptions, the people who are more successful externally tend to value me more, and the people who are more emotionally driven, heart driven, tend to value Kevin more. And the people who are more emotionally driven, heart driven, tend to value Kevin more. And I don't think it's because I'm not heart driven and I don't think it's because Kevin's not successful. I think it's because we fit the mold. I fit the mold quote unquote of the credentialed professional more than Kev, and Kev fits the mold of the humble underdog more than me, even though both of us are definitely both. But I think it's been a fascinating study, as my observer and scientist has been witnessing that. So I think there's truth to that. Dude, I've watched people look down on you for sure, especially successful people. I've watched them write you off.

Speaker 1

Yeah.

Speaker 2

Whether you're even aware of it or not. Trust me, some people wrote you off. Oh, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1

Well, if I wasn't aware?

Speaker 2

of it. I don't know if it would have bothered. You know what I mean. I yeah, I think energetically.

Speaker 1

You can feel that, though Maybe, maybe I always say on other podcasts like I feel like I was the biggest thing that held me back.

Speaker 2

I mean we all are right, but yeah. I don't, I don't think people went out of their way to bet on kev.

Speaker 1

I mean seriously no, but I don't think people went out of their way not to exactly yeah, I don't think they were trying to tear you down either.

Speaker 2

Yeah, well, right, so I tear down an underdog, right that's? That doesn't make any sense. Yeah, I think I feel like I was torn down more, but I also think a lot of people believed in me, right, yes, yeah.

Speaker 1

So that's all I'm saying is, I didn't. I don't think I had a rallying troop of people who believed in me, saying you're never gonna be anything. Yeah, so that fires me up, even though I don't know if it's real.

Speaker 2

It's like f you town I'll prove you wrong, baby.

Speaker 1

You know how dare you if an?

Validation and motivation

Speaker 2

investor came in to uxbridge high school back in 2007 at our graduation and they said I want 10 of the success of that kid, kevin palmieri. Yeah, my man, I don't. That investor would have done that right. They probably would have picked the valedictorian somewhat accurate. You know what I?

Speaker 1

mean that's, that's somebody who can look at a stock and know, yeah, yeah, I know, this company looks like a pile of dirt but. I invested things you did, alan, I was that investor, you were that investor unfortunately for you. You get very little of me really. In the grand scheme of things it's like I think I got. I got off better in that than you did well, there's the lesson I invested in me first yeah and then I invested in kev second.

Speaker 2

So it's the way to do it and it worked out very well so far so far, so good.

Speaker 1

Nostalgia, what an interesting thing I like it.

Speaker 2

I love that we came from the same town. I love that we both didn't have fathers. I love that we are becoming the male role models that we wish we had. I love that this has all worked out the way that it has, and by worked out, I mean I am grateful that, through massive amounts of time, effort and yes, failure, failure we have created something of real meaning and value. I'm very grateful.

Speaker 1

Likewise, Likewise, my friend. Likewise. Next elimination Explore your nostalgia, whatever that means. We have a private Facebook group if you're looking for like-minded individuals who are into growth. Again, I know a lot of people don't get self-improvement. They think it's weird, they think I don't know, they think self-help is a weird thing, taboo, whatever. Shout out to you for doing it because you're going to be a better person because of it. So we have a Facebook group. That's all about that. If you would be so kind to leave us a review, we would appreciate that very much. On whatever podcast platform you are listening on, and make sure, as always, you subscribe so you never miss an opportunity to level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Subscribe on YouTube. Subscribe on whatever podcast platform you are listening to us on.

Speaker 2

If you've not read the blog number 18 on my LinkedIn, it's gotten some good love. It's about how to create a magnificent career that you adore, and it's very much about looking at your past from the frame of what fulfills you, what you're really good at and what makes good money, and finding the center point of that. So check that out. The link will be in the show notes.

Speaker 1

As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you.

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Alan Lazaros

Host
Head Shot

Kevin Palmieri

Host