#1830 - Reaching Your Potential… What Does That Actually Mean?

Have you ever wondered if you’re truly reaching your potential? In this engaging episode, Kevin and Alan break down the meaning of “reaching your potential.” They explore how to push past your limits by focusing on growth in different areas of life—fitness, relationships, or self-development. Alan shares personal stories about staying ignited and the power of belief in oneself, while Kevin offers his perspective on balancing ambition with well-being. They also highlight the importance of consistently working on weaknesses to achieve success rather than coasting through life. Their candid discussion offers practical tips for anyone wanting to grow and achieve more.

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For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

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🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Transcript

Speaker 1 0:00

it doesn't necessarily require you to do anything wild. You just got to do stuff consistently for a long enough period of time and you'll get really good at stuff, especially compared to other people, because people most people are doing very minimally negative stuff for a long period of time.

Speaker 2 0:19

But I'm going to fail the goddamn course if I don't study the shit I suck at. And so you learn through massive pain, suffering and failure that you pretty much don't get to succeed at high levels unless you work on the stuff.

Speaker 1 0:34

You're terrible at Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.

Speaker 2 0:40

And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.

Speaker 1 0:43

At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Speaker 2 0:49

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health and wealth.

Speaker 1 0:56

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness. Topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

The role of pain and failure in growth

Speaker 1 1:18

Self-improvement in your pocket every day from anywhere, completely free. Welcome to Next Level University. Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today for episode number 1,830, reaching your Potential. What Does that Actually Mean? Before the inception story, I will explain that very quickly and then we'll get into the episode.

Speaker 1 1:48

We have this thing on, depending on what podcast platform I think you listen to us on, called Fan Mail or something, and you can click a button and you can text us and somebody shout out to. It doesn't really say who it is and there's no way for us to communicate with you through the text app. So it's kind of pointless in a way. But somebody was asking about the Next Level Fitness Accountability Group the link will be in the show notes. So if you click I don't know if you have to click show more, but if you scroll down as you're listening to the episode, you'll see the show notes. We'll have the WhatsApp link in there and if anybody has any other questions or comments or anything they want to give to us, feel free to click. I think it says send a text message or whatever, so I don't know. It's something that platforms are trying out now. Okay, alan texted me today at 9.42 am. He probably had just woken up, wiped the sleepies from his eyes and said I'm going to text Kev.

Speaker 2 2:45

Sir, I had been up for at least an hour and 20 minutes. 12 hours? Probably 12 hours at that point.

Speaker 1 2:53

You got to go to sleep, to get up. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, exactly, he said on one of today. He said hey, boss on one of today's episodes. Can we talk about what it means to reach your potential? And I said sure, and he hearted it. And then he did flex emoji and I oh no, yeah, and then I hearted that. And then here we are, Now we're talking about it. So why did you want to talk about it? I didn't send you a flex emoji, you sent me a flex emoji.

Speaker 1 3:25

I sent about it. I didn't send you a flex emoji. You sent me a flex emoji. I sent you one. Maybe you sent me one.

Speaker 2 3:28

Okay, there's a flex emoji in there. There's a flex kevin flex on it every now and then on it for sure, every more often than we should probably.

Speaker 1 3:34

Where did this thought process come from?

Alan’s “day in thirds” strategy for staying motivated

Speaker 2 3:37

I. I think that it's. I don't know if it's a core value or a core aspiration. I think it's both, probably, and I don't know why, but I just feel like it's not talked about enough. I don't. I've been lately trying to figure out what books, what courses, what trainings, what? Okay, so every morning my day is broken into thirds First, third for me, second, third for service, third, third, for fitness, food. Okay, so every morning I my day's broken into thirds first, third for me, second, third for service, third, third for fitness, food, and family and the first third for me in the mornings. I really want to. I want something that ignites me. I'm looking for some, something motivational, inspirational, something that's intellectual, something that gets me going. And so today I was watching a speech by Michael Burt on YouTube. It's a speech he gave in San San Diego.

Speaker 1 4:31

No, I don't know where he was. It was in Texas somewhere, san Antonio. Is that in Texas?

Speaker 2 4:36

Yeah, and it's super motivational. He talks about prey drive, he talks about staying ignited, he talks about staying in momentum. These are my words, not his, but it just gets me. It gets me going. I need something to ramp me up in the morning. And he talks a lot about potential in that speech. That's probably where that came from, because I do think that that's what drives me most. If I were to and you know what else. Now I'm realizing why this came up.

Speaker 2 5:05

I was on with a client on monday morning, 10 am on a monday morning, and we were talking about him reaching his potential and he said brother, I don't, I feel like I'm winning, but it doesn't take a ton of effort. For me, it always felt fairly seamless and he's doing very well and I'm proud of him. I think I talked about this anonymously, but I said zero to ten. How much time and effort. It always felt fairly seamless and he's doing very well and I'm proud of him. I think I talked about this anonymously, but I said zero to 10, how much time and effort are you putting in in terms of maxing out? So if 100% of you pouring your mind, body, heart and soul into something is 100% okay, what are you at? And he said 10%, maybe 20%. I said, brother, that's not going to do it, you're not going to ever be fulfilled. Letting it ride now. Does everyone need to max out and be obsessive? And I think we all have our own unique potential and I think we all have our own unique flavor of trying to achieve or reach our potential. But I do believe and this is my thesis, so I'm saying this with the humility to know that I could be wrong I don't think that I am, because I've coached hundreds of people for thousands and thousands of hours at this point, all different walks of life, and people are always more fulfilled when they are growing toward their potential. And as much as it looks cool for a week to be hanging out chilling, and that's great and there's a place for that, I don't think that. That's why we're here and I don't think that you can be fulfilled.

Finding purpose through consistent self-improvement

Speaker 2 6:30

I have one mentor in particular who is a ridiculously successful multimillionaire and I can kind of tell he's less fulfilled than I am. And it's so interesting because if you look at his life versus my life, trust me, I look like the one with the worst life. For sure. I have a way better relationship. I'm in way better shape, but in terms of finances I mean this this dude is rich as it gets and his lifestyle is Bahamas and private, flying private. It looks like he's living the dream, but the truth is behind the scenes. I am significantly more fulfilled than him and I'm trying to figure out why that is, and I think I know why. It's because I'm closer to reaching my potential. I'm ignited, I'm, I'm in alignment with reaching my potential and I it's my favorite thing in the entire world and I I realize now that it's not necessarily a sexy topic, but I do think that everyone out there watching or listening I think you will be fulfilled to the extent that you reach your own unique potential, and that is my truth and purpose.

Speaker 1 7:30

I think purpose is a big thing of it, a big piece of it too. You and I we were talking about that on the group coaching after call with Amy and we're very. We have a lot of purpose in our lives, which I'm very grateful for, and it's I think that's one of the things that makes the biggest difference. So I have an interesting perspective on this, because my perspective is going to be different than yours, as always, because my perspective is always different than yours, because we're different human beings.

Speaker 1 7:59

I think at times on this journey I have operated beyond my, which is one of the reasons I had mental health stuff, I had anxiety and I think at times I resented my potential, because every time I was trying to maximize my potential I was burning out and doing damage, like doing physical damage to myself. Maybe it won't land, but I'm weird with stuff like this. Every time I get into an elevator I see how much weight it's rated for Almost every time and I always have the thought in my mind of that's like a safe number. That's not how much weight it can actually hold. You remember that elevator in Toronto? It was terrifying, that thing was shaky.

Speaker 2 8:44

Yeah, it was number. That's not how much weight it can actually hold. You remember that elevator in Toronto? It was terrifying, that thing was shaky. Yeah, it was terrifying and we were on the 26th floor or something 34th or something like that. It was zooming and it was shaky.

Speaker 1 8:57

Yeah, you should have to buy a ticket to get on this thing.

Speaker 2 8:59

Not a chance.

Speaker 1 9:01

Shout out to anybody who lives in a high rise, my goodness gracious. But I can understand why somebody might not want to maximize their potential or they might not want to reach their potential, because I think a lot of people maybe not a lot of people, I don't know my experience has been when I'm trying to reach my potential, it usually requires me to live beyond it for a long period of time and then I need to go back and like recalibrate, I need to get back to. I need to get back to like a neutral speed, to figure out who I am, to figure out what's actually doable for me.

Speaker 2 9:35

That makes sense, yeah yeah, 100, I think what is the constructive? And this goes back to even childhood development. I've been emilia has been studying a lot of this and through her I'm learning, which is often the case. But if you're a seven-year-old, what is the constructive level of challenge for a seven-year-old physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually? This is the conversation. I'm 35, gonna be 36 in nove November. The version of me now can handle more physical, mental, emotional and spiritual weight and financial weight and responsibility than me at 22.

Speaker 2 10:14

And I playfully joked about in corporate when I was working for a company called Sensata Technologies. I was responsible for an 80 million dollar portfolio and I was in my early 20s and I was supposed to grow it to 120 million. And I remember thinking I am screwed, I don't know how I'm going to do that. And I remember you and I, we were in the studio this is in the early days and, god, we sound so old, this is in the early days. This is in the early days. And you said how do you know all this? This is when we first started getting into spreadsheets before. I mean, now we run our entire business through spreadsheets, but back then you didn't know what I knew and you didn't know any difference between you and me and all that kind of stuff, and I was also hiding it in your defense because I'm a freaking coward but now, less of a coward now thank you, the.

Speaker 2 10:56

I remember you saying dude, where did you learn all this? And I remember thinking to doesn't everyone know how to do all this, these graphs and all this? I don't think often on there's very little amount of time and effort that I put into seeing where I'm already great. To me that's a waste of time. Back in college I remember I was studying. We were pulling an all-nighter for a signal analysis test, which was just an awful class.

Speaker 2 11:26

I mean, you want to talk about humble pie, start doing laplace and four-year transforms and hard pass picture me texting kev and it going to a satellite and then going to his phone and the signal analysis that goes into all that. This is what I was learning. And I remember I was with a group of what I considered geniuses at the time and I said I just like studying the stuff I'm already good at, and they laughed out loud because that's the dumbest thing ever, right. And when you're around really smart people, a lot of times they make you feel bad because they're, they think you're, an idiot. And honestly, there are some environments where that's constructive, because if you say stupid things all the time, it's probably important for you to have the mirror of really dumb thinking. But they made fun of me quite a bit for that and I remember thinking, oh damn, yeah, that was pretty stupid and so I just made sure I got smarter after that. But ultimately, iron sharpens iron or whatever.

Speaker 2 12:22

But the point of that story is I was I. Of course you like studying the things you already know well, but I'm gonna fail the goddamn course if I don't study the I suck at. And so you learn through massive pain, suffering and failure that you pretty much don't get to succeed at high levels unless you work on the stuff you're terrible at, and so that's kind of the problem with reaching your potential and to your point, you went beyond what I think was constructive. You were probably forced beyond what might have been constructive. I mean, if you play basketball and you want to get better, you need to play with people a little bit better than you, a little outside your comfort zone, but you don't want to step on an NBA court because then if you get that much pain and suffering and that much injury or failure, you might never play again.

Speaker 2 13:13

And I think that's it's not that you don't want to reach your potential, it's that you probably ended up so far outside your comfort zone that it was destructive instead of constructive. What's the difference between destructive and constructive? Constructive means to build up. What's the difference between destructive and constructive? Constructive means to build up. Destructive means to tear down. So I think some of the things that we've done on this journey probably built me up and tore you down.

Speaker 1 13:38

Well, I think that's kind of a through line. We've learned that for sure. How do you know where your potential is? How do you know? How do you figure that out? What does it mean to reach? Because in theory, you're never actually going to reach it. Technically speaking, it's not, it's not, never going to happen. How do you know, I guess? How do you know when you're getting closer?

Speaker 2 14:01

I had this really weird conversation one time with Emilia, because Emilia and I believe in ourselves a lot and we believe in people more than anyone I've ever met and we pour a lot and we believe in people more than anyone I've ever met and we pour into people constantly Because we believe in people's potential. I mean, if you meet me, I'm going to see your potential and I'm going to pour into that version of you.

Speaker 2 14:22

I don't see just Kevin. I see what Kevin could be and I pour into that and I now know that that's weird, not some other people just see.

Speaker 2 14:34

Kevin. Hello, yeah, that's Kevin. I don't see that at all. I see what could be. I see what you could be. I see what you're. That's why I cried at your wedding, because I saw your potential manifested.

Speaker 2 14:46

You grew up in an environment you could have been nothing. We talked about that on an episode. We both could have been nothing, given where we started, and so to me, there's nothing more inspiring than someone overcoming adversity and reaching their potential through suffering. I think that's what creates meaning and, again, I'm very biased in this, but I also think some of that is inherent in the human condition. So I had this weird conversation with Emilia. We were talking about this person I was working with at the time and I said Sweetheart, I have this really big breakthrough thought what if we're seeing potential that isn't there? What if you and I were born gifted? And what if we don't know what it's like not to be? And what if other people don't believe in themselves? Not because they're wrong, but because they don't have the same quantum abilities we do? And I'll give you an example. So I'm never going to win a strongman competition, no matter how hard I work. So what if I don't believe in myself in strongman competitions, not because I'm selling myself short, but because I actually can't win a strongman competition.

Speaker 2 15:56

Some of these dudes are built different. I was on a podcast with a guy from germany who looked like a horse. This guy was huge. I couldn't even believe it was like an arnold schwarzenegger, but like bigger, it was wild. I was like what do they feed you over there? Man, right, and I'm german too, so I'm you would eat me, sir. But but I know that I have higher potential than him in certain things by a significant margin. That's just very, very clear. And one thing that I will share too and this is super scary to share, but I want to be a less of a coward you can tell when you're around someone who has higher potential than you. I think you can tell. Very rarely has that happened to me, but it does happen. Like that dude in in athletics, no question. I'm certain right there was someone who I was around that I my. Are you smarter than me? Is this like? It was weird for me. It was one of the first times in my life I've ever been insecure about my intelligence.

Speaker 1 17:00

I remember talking about that with you, yeah.

Speaker 2 17:03

And this person. They played nine instruments. It was actually 11. They're like no, no, it's technically nine, I don't care, sir, you're 15. It's awesome. Now I believe I believe in myself a lot, so I just want to learn. I went into learning mode immediately. He showed me his 3d printer and he told me about the base 12 algorithms he was doing and he, it was awesome, but I remember thinking I was is this a prodigy, Like? What the hell is this about?

Speaker 2 17:32

I think we know what our true potential is and I think we're either scared of it I think we're all scared of it. We're either scared it's not enough, or we're scared that it's too much. All of us and what I've found about you, kev, is that you have very, very high potential in certain things, one being physical suffering, and I noticed that you are a little bit less outward in amplifying that around others. And I think it's fascinating because you're a statistical anomaly in that I can say this and it doesn't come off arrogant Kevin can suffer more than almost anyone I've ever met. Physically, you can endure more suffering than most people. Most people are soft compared to you, in my honest opinion, statistically speaking. But, kev, you don't amplify that because you don't want anyone else to feel bad and or whatever. You have your own reasons.

Speaker 1 18:25

One of the big reasons is because I don't know if it would be worth it for anybody else to suffer at the degree I have. That's a big piece of it for me.

Speaker 2 18:31

You don't know if it would be constructive right.

Speaker 1 18:35

Yeah, I think people might regret it. They might get to the end of the road and say, like I don't know if it was worth going through all that. That's a big piece for me. Why I don't amplify it.

Why self-belief and potential are linked

Speaker 2 18:45

Well, when you asked, how do you know your potential, I think deep down we know and I think we're afraid of it. So, for example, you know that you're not going to be in the NBA, no matter how hard you try. If you really wanted to be in the NBA, you don't care because you don't care, right, you don't try to be in the NBA. But if you really wanted to, you would be afraid that you can't and then delude yourself into thinking you'd be insecure. It would create insecurity. But if you know you could have been and you didn't, that eats away at you that thing, that's you think I eats away at me every day.

Speaker 1 19:29

Not the.

Speaker 2 19:29

NBA, I definitely couldn't be in the.

Speaker 1 19:31

NBA. But you said to me like Kev, you don't think you could have played in the MLB. No, no, I don't, Not a chance.

Speaker 2 19:39

How do you know you're right and I'm wrong on that?

Speaker 1 19:41

I don't, but all I'm saying is it doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 19:47

Self-belief and true potential are connected, but they're not. No one is super accurate on them. In other words, I always joke. I say, well, I was right about you. You didn't think you were capable of this, and I knew you were. And I can say you know I was right, but also I was a part of that. Yes, and if you took me out of it, would it have been same? The answer is no, and I I never used to want to believe that, but it is true. So who? Who was more accurate about you, me or you? Because I believed in your potential more than you believed in your potential. And one of us was more accurate. I think we were both probably delusional. I think you were delusional under, and you were actually capable of way more than you gave yourself credit for, and I think I was delusional over, and I think you are probably capable of less than what I I would agree want to believe you are capable of.

Speaker 1 20:38

I think most people are capable of less than you want to believe, honestly, just because the way you're but more than they believe.

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Speaker 1 20:48

A lot of the time right, yeah, I would say so yeah, they believe a lot of the time, right, yeah, I would say so. Yeah, yeah, I think it's kind of always that it's always somewhere in between those two places. Next level nation. What is happening? If you've thought to yourself I want to try coaching, but you don't really know where to start, group coaching would be a wonderful place for you. That's really why we created it in the first place. We start a new round every 90 days.

Speaker 1 21:15

So if you're hearing this, go to the website nextleveluniversecom and we have the landing page where you can actually hold your spot right now. Even if there's a group going on right now, you can still lock your spot for the next one. The biggest thing that we've seen is, as we get closer and closer to the date, unfortunately, some people end up missing. The group fills up and they can't do it, and then they end up regretting that. So please head over to the website. The link will be in the show notes and we would love to see you there, but I think it's very hard.

Speaker 1 21:45

The thing that doesn't land for me is how do you understand your potential if you don't understand time now? Yeah, I genuinely believe I can be the best speaker on the planet eventually, just because I mean, who's doing as many reps as we're doing at this point? I mean, there's people out there, for sure, but but it's not going to be this year, it's not going to be next year and it's not going to be when I'm 40. It's not going gonna be when I'm 42.

Speaker 1 22:11

We're talking 55, probably, right yeah we're talking years and years and years and years and years. But in the beginning I couldn't think of things that way. That's not how it worked. And now I know, because I am in my relationship, I'm you, because I'm always like 10 years, babe, 10 years it's gonna be fine. It's like that doesn't land With anybody, that doesn't really end. Yeah, no, decades, a long time. Did you know you were gonna be? I want A rhetorical question did you know you were gonna be doing this when you were 26? I didn't. I had no idea I was gonna be doing this when I was 25, because I'm 35 now, 10 years, so much can change. It's hard to imagine, you know.

Speaker 2 22:54

We had a mentor that said that long-term strategic thinking was stupid and that no one can predict 10 years out. And I said no, you're inaccurate about. Long-term strategic thinking is one of the most important things in the entire world, for sure, without question. I mean, there is. I don't even want to defend it because just that was dumb what he said and wrong and inaccurate. And he's like well, if, if that's the case, then you should be president. And I said person's name.

Speaker 2 23:36

I said sir I decided not to be president when I was 14 years old. I was going to be lawyer, politician president or it was going to be engineer. Mba fortune 50. Ceo of a tech company but for you that's normal. But what if I could calculate it and other people can't? So what if it is possible? What if?

Speaker 1 23:58

Yeah, it very well may be, but all I'm saying is, if nobody has ever experienced a human like you, they're going to think you're off your rocker, that's all. What if all of the, all of the reactions you have gotten in your life has nothing to do with you or your capabilities, but it's all to do with the fact that most people have never met someone like you, so they couldn't possibly, if anything, I'm weird as shit now because of you in a good way, not a bad way. Just because I'm now it's like, yeah, we talk about 10, 15, 20 years down the line All the time, routinely, like every time we talk we're talking about the future. But in the beginning I thought you were freaking nuts.

Speaker 1 24:46

But you didn't tell me that Because it was like I don't think he's bullshitting me, I don't think he's just like saying stuff, but I have nothing to point to that he knows what he's talking about. I have no idea how he knows. I say that on other podcasts. I say he's, he's a wise wizard. I don't know how to explain it. I don't get it. I don't know how to explain it. I couldn't sell you on it. I couldn't give you a list of reasons why Like, here's the proof I couldn't. I don't know how to do it, I couldn't do it. God that sucks. But I also understand why people would struggle to Anybody. If anybody got triggered when Alan said that I decided not to be president. Sit with that because it's's just, it's a different level of self-belief. No, I want to make it clear. I didn't guarantee I could be. I know, I know, I know, but even that Broken home, born in the US.

Speaker 2 25:37

Like I calculated it, father died at two Intellectual politician. I could, I could certainly I have a solid probability Of that being a possibility. Yeah, yeah and.

Speaker 1 25:47

I'm not disagreeing a solid probability of that being a possibility. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and so I can't guarantee it. I never said I guarantee I'll be, but I was gonna go for it, yeah and I decided not to after that law class, by the way.

Speaker 2 25:57

Well, I, yes, so I am the one who I'm not kidding. That was hard for me affected the 2050 presidential election I'm not kidding. That was an identity crisis for me. Are you happy it turned out?

Speaker 1 26:11

the way it did.

Speaker 2 26:13

Yeah, thank you For sure Because if you weren't.

Speaker 1 26:15

I don't know, but I remember thinking that was brutal.

Speaker 2 26:18

I showed up with a full suit we had.

Speaker 1 26:21

So you lost your first case. You convicted her for first degree murder. She knew what she was doing? No, she didn't. Man.

Speaker 2 26:34

She did what she was doing? No, she didn't, she did she. Literally our our uh teacher said I will never forget it you, the jury goes back. Kev, you were best friends with the with my opponent.

Speaker 1 26:40

Rule number one when you're picking a jury, you have to know who's who. Son, that's on you and our teacher.

Speaker 2 26:46

I almost said professor, definitely not our teacher. Hutch, yeah, hutch, definitely not Our teacher. Hutch, yeah, hutch, my man Hutch. He said, well, I know my choice. And we were talking to him and he said it's a clear, you guys are good Wrong. Head of the jury convicted of first degree murder for the woman who accidentally did drugs while she was pregnant. Nobody accidentally does drugs, okay, fair, but it's not premeditated, so like she tried to murder her own baby. So anyways, this is a mock fake court case kevin and i's we got.

Speaker 1 27:19

Blood goes way back so you wouldn't let me win, no matter what you weren't winning, no matter what, yeah, no no, I would've it was. The jury was fixed, son. Hey, I kid you not.

Speaker 2 27:30

Your friend Sean. He Handed the same Paper. I swear to god, picture me and my my friend Ryan. We're in a full suit In the middle of School. This is a mock court case. We're lawyers and Kevin's best friend, who he lives with which I didn't know at the time, I didn't live that. We got for the assignment and Kev one of the things you said, I kid you not. Well, he handed us stuff. He handed us research. He did no, no, no. He handed you back the piece of paper.

Speaker 1 28:08

He went above and beyond. He went above and beyond I'm crying because I'm laughing he went above and beyond. You didn't do any of that. You came in with a suit on your high horse thinking you were gonna win us over with your good looks and your wise words, and you're not gonna do it in my prepubescent demeanor.

Speaker 2 28:24

Yeah, what are we doing here? Funny?

Speaker 1 28:26

yeah, you lost. When you walked in with a suit. You guys had full suits on. I said you guys, you guys need to get it.

Speaker 2 28:31

For some reason, the world doesn't like try hards.

Speaker 1 28:33

I was trying to be a professional because I thought not being not trying hard was cool which you. You were definitely on the side of the majority, for sure, yeah and it it did come back to bite me in the butt many times later in life, so I it's probably not the way to go but anyway.

Speaker 2 28:49

So I know we gotta get back on it. You go ahead, what were you gonna?

Speaker 1 28:51

say the. The only reason I wanted to say that is because I understand. I understand how I understand how somebody could take that. Yeah, I understand Somebody might hear that and be like you are out to lunch.

Speaker 2 29:07

Okay, and again real quick. Someone has to be president. Yes, yes, yes, you know how you say. People play the lottery. Someone has to win. Well, at least president's more in my control than the lottery Fair by a significant margin. I mean, I'm much more likely to be president if I'm trying to be president than me winning the lottery.

Speaker 2 29:27

But people play the lottery all the time, right? So I think it's just hard because mathematically, you can calculate the probability of outcomes in advance, and when I say you, I think that that's a superpower I've always had. So I don't know what it's like to live in a world where you can't do that.

Speaker 1 29:44

It sucks, it's not great.

Speaker 2 29:47

Yeah, it must feel very out of control.

Speaker 1 29:49

I think it feels normal. I don't know, I don't know if I would identify as out of control, because it's normal, right? I remember people ask me how did you play baseball blind in one eye? I don't. This is what I see. I see what I see.

Speaker 2 30:01

I don't. What do you want me to tell you?

Speaker 1 30:03

I would love to see what you see Like, didn't you know?

Speaker 2 30:05

Like a blurry ball. How would I possibly know? Yeah, you wouldn't know. How would I?

Speaker 1 30:09

possibly know. This is what I've seen my whole life. It was never a vision thing. My depth perception is horrible. There was a point, I think, maybe after Little League, my eyes got worse because it was like if you hit a pop fly when I was playing high school baseball, anything could happen. I'd be like right under it and I'd be like, yeah, here we go. And it would be like 15 feet to my right. I have no idea how the ball got over there, no clue.

Speaker 2 30:39

So yeah, that's a little bit about my illness. So every time there was a pop fly coming your way, you were shitting kittens.

Speaker 1 30:42

Every time, yeah, ground ball, whatever. Give me whatever you want, give me the hardest ground ball you want. Whatever, I'll just knock it down with my throat. I don't care, pop flies. It's a coin flip. It is a coin flip.

Speaker 2 30:55

It is bad. That's how most people feel in life. That's how I felt.

Speaker 1 30:58

That's how I felt, for sure man.

Speaker 2 31:01

For sure.

Speaker 1 31:02

But I just say that because I think there's a little piece of me that wants to protect you against anybody who thinks that's delusional. That's all. Just because if I said that it would be very delusional. I'm not.

Speaker 2 31:12

I wasn't going down that road in life Quote behind me. It says here's to the crazy ones the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. It's a Steve Jobs quote. Steve Jobs was crazy enough to think he could change the world and he did. And you know, did he make mistakes? Yes, and you know, he's no longer my hero. We're all a warning and an example. But the truth of the matter is that quote always resonated because everyone always thought I was crazy. And people are realizing that I was less crazy than they thought, because we are a little more successful than we were in the beginning. A lot more successful than we were in the beginning. But the cool part about potential is we're at the very beginning. I mean, we're barely scratching the surface of our potential.

Speaker 1 31:52

But that's a time thing I think it's really hard to. I have that now. I understand that now. So can you sell?

Speaker 2 31:57

it. What are your thoughts on potential?

How to measure progress toward your potential

Speaker 1 32:05

I know we got to jump, but what did you used to think about reaching your potential versus now? I used to think that I am the way I am and this is it. I had a very fixed mindset I am as smart as I'll ever be. I'm as good of a speaker, as I didn't understand that if you do something for long enough, you will most likely get far better at it. Does it mean you'll be the best in the world? No, it doesn't mean that. Does it mean you'll be the best you could possibly be if you do it for long enough? Yes, in theory right.

Speaker 1 32:32

If you do something until you're physically incapable of doing it, you'll eventually be the best you ever were at it. Eventually, yeah. It's just that it doesn't necessarily require you to do anything wild. You just gotta do stuff consistently for a long enough period of time and you'll get really good at stuff, especially compared to other people, because most people are doing very minimally negative stuff for a long period of time. You'll get really good at stuff, especially compared to other people, because people, most people, are doing very minimally negative stuff for a long period of time, so they're actually getting worse at the same rate, and worse, I just mean in terms of physical, mental, emotional, spiritual health relationships, financial decisions, whatever it is, they're getting worse at the same rate you're getting better. So it's actually you're going twice as fast, exponentially faster than they are.

Speaker 2 33:22

I don't know if I can sell it.

Speaker 1 33:24

I just said exponentially. I would never resonate with that. I'd be like what the hell are you talking about, dude? Really, exponential's math man. I had to cheat to get through math. You know, mr Silvestri did not like me very much 1795 boss, you remember when he used to talk to the whiteboard.

Speaker 2 33:46

Do you remember that?

Speaker 1 33:47

I don't know.

Speaker 2 33:48

Yeah, he used to turn to the whiteboard and say no one's listening to me. It was actually pretty funny.

Speaker 1 33:53

Shout out to any teachers out there. I feel bad. I look back and it's like yeah, I was not a. I was not a good student. The teachers probably felt very unseen, unheard, unappreciated, you know yeah, it's not easy to.

Speaker 2 34:08

Yeah, shout out to the teachers for sure. Shout out for sure. Two of my clients are teachers. I love it. Yep, shout out to them I love it. One of them's an ex-teacher, but yeah, they were both.

Speaker 1 34:18

They were both educators once a teacher, always a teacher, that they were both educators.

Speaker 2 34:21

Once a teacher, always a teacher, that's what I'm saying Once a teacher always a teacher.

Speaker 1 34:23

All right, what's your lesson, your takeaway here?

Speaker 2 34:27

sir, I guess how focused are you on reaching your potential? The more you focus on something, the more you'll invest in it. The more you invest in it, the more likely it occurs, and that is mathematically true. And so how much are you investing in reaching your potential? How much do you care about it?

Speaker 2 34:47

Because most of the things you want in life are a byproduct of that. I mean everything I've achieved in life. There's no way I Last thing, emilia is 29 years old. I call her my young hot tamale. I'm joking, but I'm 35, about to be 36. There's no way me at 29 could have attracted her now. Her now is brilliant compared to me at 29. It's not even close. Me at 36 can be with her for sure as a peer.

Speaker 2 35:15

And so most of what you want in life I've always wanted a relationship this amazing. I've always wanted to be with someone like her. I just wasn't capable of it yet, and I think that that's. It's just the truth. Most of what you want to achieve in life. You have to grow into your goals. You want a mansion on the beach. You want your dream car. You want your dream relationship. You want your fulfillment. You want to reach your physique goals.

Speaker 2 35:43

All of those are a byproduct of you reaching your potential and I don't think a lot of people know that and that I found that out when I was 26. I used to work hard on everything outside of myself and then at 26, I went all in and I realized the cheat code. I realized the real answer is focusing on improving me, because I used to improve at basketball and at snowboarding and at spreadsheets, and I used to improve everything around me and everyone around me. That was always the case, but I never focused enough on improving myself and after 26, I started doing that and I went broke eventually. But the stuff that I was doing at 27, 28, 29 built the foundation that you and I are still building upon today.

Speaker 1 36:25

Yeah, I think that's a really good way to put it. If your goals are greater than what you currently are capable of, you achieving more in terms of your potential is what's going to get you to your goals. That's all it is.

Speaker 1 36:38

When you get a goal you have of your potential is what's going to get you to your goals. That's all it is. When you get a goal, you have reached your potential in alignment with what it took to get the goal ultimately, and then, when you set a new goal, you got to do it over again. Oh, it's time to. Yeah, I know that I used to be able to, I used to have the opportunity to do this and I I could hit snooze and still accomplish my goal, but now I have to reach a new level of my potential. I have to get up on my alarm, whatever it is All right.

Speaker 2 37:04

Appreciate it, it's great it was great, one last question.

Speaker 1 37:09

Yeah, sure, I don't have anything to do when you and I first started seven years ago.

Speaker 2 37:13

Yeah, how much do you think you multiplied your potential since then? So this version of Kev is what? 100 times more capable than when I met you or when we started working together?

Speaker 1 37:31

I don't even know Numbers, numbers.

Speaker 2 37:33

Could that version of Kevin ever handle what we're growing?

Speaker 1 37:36

through no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, god, no, no, no, I don't know. I don't know what the number would be. I generally don't know. I feel like I would just be making up a number. I don't know. You know better than I do because you know the numbers. But yeah, I would say at least a hundred times more capable, yeah. When I first met you you couldn't even hang in.

Speaker 2 37:52

A makes it sound bad, but but you were cognitively burnt out within an hour and a half of a deep conversation.

Speaker 1 38:00

Turns out you need sleep. Turns out you can't get four hours of sleep every night.

Speaker 2 38:06

No, you cannot reach your potential at four hours of sleep. I didn't realize it, didn't know. Anyways, it's very inspiring, I think.

Speaker 1 38:13

Well, I appreciate it. I appreciate it. I think this is one of those things where I just I don't know. I don't have the answer to this. I don't have the answer to potential. You're more dialed in on potential. You've been looking for it for your whole life. I really haven't. I'm just figuring out where my potential is now. You know, and I still don't know. We've only been doing this for seven years. It's not that long in the grand scheme of things. Right, it's not that long. Seven, how many years are how many years? Was I in school? I was in school for 12 years so.

Speaker 1 38:46

I still have five more years of doing this before I, when I'll catch up to how many years I spent in school.

Speaker 2 38:53

Well, it sounds like you invested those very wisely. Well, I didn't. I didn't at all.

Speaker 1 38:57

So if anything, I expect to grow a lot more here, because I'm actually focused on it. Yeah, all right, group coaching starts on October 8th at 5 pm Eastern Standard Time. If you use the discount code NLULISTENER, you'll get 30% off. It ends up being $96.60 per month and you get four calls per month Two with Alan and myself and amy, and then two with amy. And what do I feel about group coaching? I, yeah, I keep saying this, but this is what jumps off the page most for me. You will be the most consistent, fulfilled version of yourself, because you are going to have specific goals and you're going to know exactly what to do in order to get them, and kind of like we were talking. I know what it's like to feel lost when it comes to goal setting and goal getting. We will help you with that. We are very bad at many things most things, in fact but that's something that we are very, very good at, so we will help you. We'll have the link in the show notes. Alan still has coaching spots available.

Outro

Speaker 1 39:55

If you need help with your podcast, just reach out. I'm happy to help in any way. I can. Free call coaching, whatever. We'll have all the links in the show notes for that and yes, real quick. The fan mail thing. I don't know, if it says fan mail, I would consider it family mail because we don't have fans. But it either says that or maybe it says send us a text message, we will get it and then we will respond anonymously on the podcast. So if you've ever wanted to get a question on the podcast, whatever, that's the way to do it, as always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Speaker 2 40:31

Please reach out.

Speaker 1 40:34

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Speaker 2 40:40

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Speaker 1 40:49

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow. Thank you.