Next Level University

#1852 - Reflection Is Such An Important Practice - Freestyle Friday

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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0:00 | 38:58

Are you giving it your all in life, or is there more you can do to reach your full potential? In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan dive into the brutal truths about chasing dreams, overcoming obstacles, balancing pushing hard, and practicing self-compassion. Tune in for an honest talk about personal growth and achieving success in all areas of life—health, wealth, love, and beyond.

Link mentioned:
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(3:40) Reflecting on past challenges and growth
(5:48) Technology’s impact on modern life and work habits
(9:00) Story of the first woman to swim the English Channel
(14:27) Pressure, growth, and handling challenges in life
(19:24) Next Level Dreamliner: the planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(25:39) Understanding the balance between pressure and self-love
(38:14) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Speaker 1

I think we're approaching a lot of people are approaching a peak when we're only 2% of the way to the journey. Maybe not even Alan would know better than I. This is 2%. Imagine what 90% would be like, but that's not going to be for another 50 years If you do aspire to reach your true potential.

Speaker 2

Which I do think is kind of the root underneath this show in general is holistic potential health, wealth, life and love.

Speaker 1

How do you?

Speaker 2

maximize your. We all get one life. Let's make the most of it. I think that's underneath this, and you and I are going to have to be more honest, as we get older and older and older, on what this really took.

Speaker 1

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Speaker 2

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life love health and wealth.

Speaker 1

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success Self-improvement in your pocket every day, from anywhere, completely free welcome to next level university, next level nation.

Speaker 1

welcome back to another episode of next level university, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1852, it's freestyle friday and if you're new to NLU, freestyle Friday means we don't really know what we're going to talk about. We're going to have a conversation. Obviously there's going to be self-improvement. Maybe it'll be some laughs, who knows? But before we do this and we haven't done this in too long and I'm not going to go through the whole list because that would be the entire episode but I want to give a shout out to some of the newer Next Level Nation members. And here we go Mallory Taylor, james, carissa, ryan, matt Dane, emily Gregory, marika Aswand, jay, matthew, mark Dana, jennifer Latasha and Moses. You know, moses, our buddy Moses.

Speaker 1

Yeah, he's in group coaching no, no, no, no, no different person. My apologies, my apologies moses is different.

Speaker 2

M not the same name different?

Speaker 1

m. Yes, both m's. Mufaro correct is in group coaching. Shout out to mufaro if you are listening. So yes, those are all the newer members of next level nation and the reason we're doing the shoutouts is based on the fact that I was going back last night, so finished at about. I think I finished around 5.30. Did some laundry Adulting at its finest and I was just in one of those moods when I'm really high emotionally, really low emotionally, trying to figure out who. I am going through an identity crisis. I just look at old content and I went back to some of our old episodes and I went back to when we interviewed Isabella Picard for the first time.

Speaker 2

Oh no.

Speaker 1

It was brutal, yeah it. No, it was brutal, yeah it was brutal.

Speaker 2

It was brutal.

Speaker 1

Everybody starts somewhere. Everybody starts somewhere. I went back to when we were in the studio, when we used to do live weekly episodes on Zoom. Remember that.

Speaker 2

That was back before Zoom was a big thing. Zoom was all I mean. Zoom's been around for a long time, but it wasn't until COVID the lockdown that Zoom conferencing became so ubiquitous.

Speaker 1

Ubiquitous. Why are you using that word? Why do? You try to make me feel stupid.

Speaker 2

I don't.

Speaker 1

You said it twice this week.

Speaker 2

I could have said uh normal, popular, accessible, common. Yeah, he comes with ubiquitous, you know how to spell that.

Speaker 1

Can you spell that?

Speaker 2

you know, I don't like language of origin. Please, you know I don't speak spanish. No, uh, that's a silly quote from a comedy movie. I don't know how to spell it.

Speaker 2

I'm not gonna spell it what I don't know either is how much the world has changed in such a short amount of time. I think we lose sight of that. I know that we do, I do, and that's why I love watching old movies. That's why not only old movies, we watched the woman Woman no Young Woman and the Sea, produced by Disney 2024. Phenomenal, kev. Every time you think your day is hard, go watch that I want you to think about. Yeah, well, don't go watch that.

Speaker 2

Every time you think your day is hard, go watch a film. No, but every time you think your day is hard, think about this. All right, this young woman is swimming the english channel is uh, is her name diana?

Speaker 1

is somebody very famous who is a swimmer? Diana niad, I think her name is. Is it the movie about her passed?

Speaker 2

away? Uh, because this is set in the early 1900s yeah, this is like is like 19,. I believe it's 1924. Very fascinating. And the reason I love watching period pieces old films is because just the progression of technology is fascinating. You and I used to be in an in-person studio. Five, six, even, let's say, 10 years ago, streamyard was not in existence.

Speaker 1

Most likely not.

Speaker 2

A lot of the things we use today everyone out there watching or listening to this a lot of the things you use today didn't exist 10 years ago. Like, let's real quick, I have an aura ring on. That didn't exist 10 years ago. Streamyard didn't exist 10 years ago. Stream yard didn't exist 10 years ago. We're using buzzsprout as our podcast platform. That didn't exist 10 years ago probably not no uh, these microphones probably didn't exist 10 years ago my underwear, my undies, you would come with that.

Speaker 1

You know this. Okay, so pretty so this, this film.

Speaker 2

She is swimming the english channel by herself in the middle of the ocean, hard pass, yeah. And all of a sudden the ocean looks very red, like the color of my shirt if If you're on YouTube it's like that color, probably a little lighter than that and there's a boat following her, not allowed to touch her, because then she can't break the record. She was the first woman ever to swim the English Channel. That was the thing, and back then women were perceived as too weak to do it and all this crap. Okay, and so there's a boat alongside to make sure she doesn't die or be eaten by a shark or whatever, but can't touch her. She has to do it herself, that kind of thing. All of a sudden they look ahead and it's a red, just strip of ocean. Jellyfish, all jellyfish, like thousands, probably a million jellyfish swims right through it. Man hammers right on through it.

Speaker 2

That scene was brutal for me to watch because, here's why, based on a true story, she actually did that. There's a biography about her that this movie's built on and I said to you I turned to you when we were watching because she adored the film. One of our clients she's a pilot, her name's heather shout out to heather she recommended we watch it because she's an empowered woman and it's a very empowered woman film women listening. Go watch this film. I promise you'll. You'll enjoy it because they were like, oh, women can't swim.

Speaker 2

And blah, blah, blah. She crushed every man's record. It's just awesome to see so anyway. So she swam through a sea of jellyfish and was stung hundreds of times and didn't give an f and was like fuck y'all, I'm doing this and just the epitome of someone who's willing to die for their dreams. Something about that is just so inspiring. Now she didn't die, which is why I'm here to tell the story, right, uh, so if she did, it would have been a significantly worse ending. However, she did do it and, uh, hopefully I didn't just give away the ending for everybody. However, I'm pretty sure everyone knows that she did it because it's a very historical moment to this day, real quick where are you going with this?

Speaker 2

you'll see. Okay, uh, real quick. Largest parade ever for any athlete in history. That woman when she came back from swimming the english channel where was she new york from?

Story of the first woman to swim the English Channel

Speaker 1

she was new york.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah, she grew up in new york city. The point of that story is dream chasing. For those of you out there who are struggle busing, who are dealing with the mundane, who have challenges, health, wealth, whatever just remember that everyone out there chasing their dreams is facing tremendous adversity, and it's better than jellyfish dreams is facing tremendous adversity and it's better than jellyfish.

Speaker 1

Yeah, I don't swimming in any any. I saw a picture the other day of I don't remember what it's called, but when you're in the navy there are certain days where you get like a free day for lack of better phrasing and you can swim in the ocean. Just imagine, like an aircraft, aircraft carrier, out in the middle of nowhere and just a bunch of people leaping off of it into the ocean that's awesome no, it's not awesome at all.

Speaker 2

No, never, never never, never, never, never. It's pretty awesome never I. We never talk about this because we don't talk about anything other than self-improvement. Right, I grew up, my stepfather had many boats and then eventually we had a yacht. It's like a I don't know 34 foot or something, I don't know, but it had one of those towers that you walk up and you can jump off the top of it. It was awesome. What was it named?

Speaker 2

The SS Minnow, but it had one of those towers that you walk up. Yeah, you can jump off the top of it. It's awesome. What was it named? The? Ss minnow john jeff the ss minnow johnson no it was not named.

Speaker 1

That I honestly don't know what it was named. I have a question for you. Let's, let's provide maybe a little bit value, just a sliver of value, in this episode. That's it. That's all I ask. I'm not asking for much.

Speaker 1

You and I had a conversation behind the scenes, okay, mm-hmm, and you said when you're really going through it and stuff sucks and it's brutal and all of that, you go find perspective in other things. Maybe you read a book, a Man's Search for Meeting, by Viktor Frankl, which is about some of the atrocities of a human, the atrocities that a human can go through, and you said that always helps me because it makes me realize what I'm going through is not anything in comparison to that. What advice would you give to somebody who doesn't get the same response? Because you and I had a conversation and you said one of my clients said it just makes them feel bad when they're going through something, and then then they it's like oh, you can't even feel bad about what you're going through, cause then you compare it to somebody else. What advice would you give to somebody?

Speaker 2

Well, I want to provide context to that. So I I coach a therapist and she said it's you have to be careful with that, because not only is your client sad, but now they have to feel sad about feeling sad, and for me that that's never the case when I watch films. So I was interviewed recently by someone who grew up during the genocides in Rwanda I think it might have been Moses and he talks about this publicly, so I'm not airing his stuff out. He's a podcaster and I remember feeling very humbled by that experience of how hard his life was in comparison to mine. To me that's very inspiring, how hard his life was in comparison to mine. To me that's very inspiring.

Speaker 2

I don't know, I don't really know what it's like to when you feel sorry for yourself. I go from. I don't do, I don't spend much time there, I and again I. I just want to be very transparent here and this is probably where the episode's going, which is good, freestyle friday. I don't know if I know what it's like to spend a lot of time feeling sorry for myself, because I I find that, uh, I guess I just can't empathize a ton because I don't. I mean nothing that you and I are challenged with right now. Is actually that challenging in comparison to what many people have gone through Not most people. I actually think we face more challenges than most people, statistically.

Speaker 2

The bigger your goals are, the more challenges you're going to face. I mean, no one needs to swim the English Channel, no one needs to do that. But that's what it takes to achieve great things is you have to endure massive, endure massive hardship, in this case in the form of jellyfish. But what is your experience with that?

Speaker 1

because not the same as you, I. There's almost a piece of me that feels guilty that I don't think that way. It's like when I watch. The pursuit of happiness is one of my favorite movies of all time. Just because of the visualization of the amount of suffering and overcoming. Yeah, it's a great film. Great film. The scene in the subway bathroom or the train station bathroom.

Speaker 1

My goodness, if I ever need to get emotional, I'll just go watch that. That'll do it every single time. But I don't. It's not that I feel sorry for myself. I think it's that I feel scared for myself, and not currently, not in this moment. But it's not, it's not. Oh man, my life, my life sucks. And it's not that it's more. This is the most pressure, or this is the most uncertainty, or this is the most the furthest I've been in this direction. Whatever it is, I think it's more that.

Speaker 2

Do you trust that your mind is going to adapt? I think that's one of the things, too, and and you and I have talked behind the scenes about how I think you're too soft on people and I think you think I'm too hard on people and it depends. I mean, we're both getting better, so I'm not I'm not blanket state statementing that there's a certain level of pressure that is constructive for everyone and it depends on the person. And the metaphor that I use in this is you're not gonna put massive pressure on a six-year-old when they're learning how to swim, but if you're 40 and you still don't know how to swim, someone has to come to you and say come on, get in the fucking pool. What are we doing here? And and I know that sounds like I'm being a dick, but the truth is, there has to be some level of accountability.

Speaker 1

There's an expiration date on being incompetent but you're assuming that the 40-year-old human has more exponentially more competence or capability or ability to receive feedback than the 6-year-old?

Speaker 2

Well, they don't if they've been babied their whole life. Right, and there is. I think there's the toxic masculine side which is too much, and I think that's you know. Throw them in the pool and if they drown that's their own fault. That's too extreme. But there's another extreme, which is don't hold anyone accountable to anything. There is an expiration date on blaming your problems on other people. I think that and it's very hard to find five and stay at five, and I do understand that right, I have some clients I playfully refer to as my navy seal clients.

Speaker 2

They're twice a week and I just there's a disclaimer that I give. There's a genuine. I mean, you don't go to the military. Imagine going to the military and boot camp and not having it be hard. You would have an army that is not competent. You wouldn't have, and then when the bullets start flying, everything's going to go horribly wrong. So there is something to be said for being cruel, to be kind. You can overdo that. I'm not saying to be like Sergeant Gunnery in Full Metal Jacket. I mean that's another level. But there has to be some level of suck it up buttercup, as long as it's balanced with empathy and an understanding of what is constructive and what's destructive. So if you just lost a loved one, I'm not going to be like dude, get your ass in the pool. But if you are soft and just chilling, eating cheetos on the couch, kev, what are we doing?

Speaker 1

son like you have got to get it together and we are going to go out of business if you, but that's me, though, that's different, but it's you have to be.

Speaker 2

You have to be that, that optimal, I know, amount for every person and you have to decide what's the point of the relationship. Is the point of the relationship growth, or is the point of the relationship to it to to be kind, and, and you have to, I, I can.

Speaker 2

I can be kind, but growth is first yeah so this is what I've had to learn and this is just me in my 30s, so particularly 35 because I've realized I have to decide. I can't be kind, like I can be kind and hard on you, or I can be hard on you and kind. I'm choosing the second one. I care about your growth more than your, more than anything else. It doesn't mean I won't be kind to you, it just means I care about your growth more than whether or not I put you into a little bit of pressure, and I know that I'm not doing that with everyone.

Speaker 2

I'm not at a barbecue like hey, what's your life goal and why are you lackadaisical? Like you have to pick and choose, of course, but parents deal with this all the time and I coach a lot of parents. They have a hard time understanding the level of pressure to put their children in Dude. When I went to college college I never talk about this, but I got financial aid and I was going to get kicked out of school if I didn't succeed. Right, I I would. I would have gotten kicked out. Like you can't afford this on your own and you have academic scholarships.

Speaker 1

You're there's something that happens when you and playing kevin, kevin's advocate.

Speaker 2

I don't like devil's advocate. It sounds, I don't like it. That's way better, a little bit better. I don't know what you should do. By the way, I love this kevin kevin's advocate.

Speaker 1

You also were capable enough to get into one of the most prestigious technical schools on the planet, so you should be able to handle more pressure than me, sir. I was pumping gas at a fucking gas station and you're out here going to one of the best technical colleges on the planet.

Speaker 2

Well, that's one of the things, and I've never shared this either on the show, but I'm glad we're having this conversation. I want to hear your perspective. I don't know how glad I am yet because I fired my shot.

Speaker 1

Now I have to wait for the shot to get fired back. This is always the point where I might regret what I just said.

Speaker 2

Hello, hello, hello. Nlu listener. Thank you, as always, for listening to Next Level University. Real quick, I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes.

Speaker 2

So I remember one time I was partying with some friends and there's a mutual friend of ours that we both are aware of. I don't know if we'd call them friends, but one of my close friends that I grew up with said oh well, he could have gone to WPI. He would crush it at WPI, he's brilliant. And I tried and I got really made fun of get off your high horse and blah, blah, blah. But I tried to actually break it down and I said no, no, he couldn't. And this person was dude, what do you mean? Get off your high horse? Like? What do you mean get off your high horse? Like? What do you mean? Of course he could. He's brilliant. And I'm.

Speaker 2

I said you're lessening the value of the people that are there, like, no, he couldn't. I know people way smarter than him. That can't either. And you know what it was. You know what pissed me off. It lessens what it took for me to do it. You can't just go to Harvard because you think you should. Whatever that is, man, I don't have that Like. There is no. Well, anyone should be able to go to MIT. That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. And I don't want to be unkind, I just want to be honest. Like that's like okay, should everyone be in the nfl? It lessens the value when you give it to everyone. But just out of, there's no like okay, I got straight a's in high school, kevin didn't. So who has earned it's not even just earned in like a I'm righteous way, it's more of you're not ready. Like if you went to WPI. And I'm not trying to be unkind, I adore you. I adore you as well.

Speaker 1

I do Now. Give it to me Now give it to me, you now could. You now could go to WPI. I'm not even kidding, not a chance. All right, you'd struggle, you'd struggle All right.

Speaker 2

With the right guide tutor, you could do it I know, I know, yeah, maybe, yeah, maybe, but I would hate you so badly. Yeah, yeah, that's fair. Okay, my point is is that you are now physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually developed enough to go and handle that kind of pressure, and that is true. You can handle that pressure now. Could you do laplace transforms and advanced calculus?

Speaker 2

no, and even that is point, proof of my point, which is you, you can't just throw someone in calculus and expect them to swim, right, just like you can't jump in the ocean and expect them to swim. You, you have to start with pre-calc, and then you know algebra one, algebra two, geometry, trigonometry, and, and you have to kind of build your way up, and all of us are building our way up, and so I think, one of the problems I think that we face as human beings you myself and our generation in particular I was just on a podcast with someone who was a, a baby boomer and he, he has a very he's not toxic masculine. He was very, uh, centered in this, but he said there's something to be said for, like, when you grow up on a farm, you eat last, the pigs eat first, and if you don't feed the pigs, you don't eat later. And and he, he made a metaphor and he said he said imagine, uh, going to a table of millennials or younger generation and saying, hey, who, who wants to help me build a fence? And everyone's like I'd rather play video games. And then, okay, well, who wants to help me feed the pigs? And I'd rather play video games. And then okay, well, who wants to help me feed the pigs? And I'd rather play video games. And uh, okay, well, who wants to help me? Uh, I don't know, I don't know what farms do, but stuff around the farm and everyone says no. And then he comes back with a big dinner, with the bread and with the pork, and and he said who wants to eat? And everyone sits down and eats.

Speaker 2

I think that that's a good metaphor for what's happening, particularly in countries of abundance, is, I think, that we're past generations have built a lot of what we now enjoy and we have lost sight of what built it. And I actually do believe that to be true, particularly because technology makes everything so accessible. You know, our grandparents had to go to the store and had to go to six different stores. I was asked, talking to emilia's mom about back in the day, and emilia and I use walmart plus and it gets delivered, that's great. And she said you know, back when I asked her, what's different? What do you notice? That's different, and she said we used to have to go to a different store for every one One store for meat, one store for bread, one store, for it used to be a day-long trip just to get groceries. And now it's just boop, it's there and that's awesome, but I just think people don't understand. I think it makes us inherently a little more lazy. It does. It makes us a little more lazy.

Speaker 1

And I have to constantly fight against that. Yeah, it's easy to get entitled. Yeah, it's easy to get entitled when there is quite literally magic at your fingertips. I needed dishwasher pods pressed about one button and they got here the next day, even dishwasher pods.

Speaker 2

It's like that saves time, right. So even that it yeah it's understandable.

Speaker 1

it's understandable. I just for me, I don't know what the right answer is for somebody out there. I think comparison is always dangerous and the last thing I want for someone is for them to feel detrimentally guilty about feeling a certain way and then comparing it to somebody else. I'm not saying it can't be constructive. I think some of the interviews you and I did early on it was so much perspective. Isabella was huge. Isabella was one of the most positive people ever and she had gone through a ton. Eric LeGrand when we went to his house there was a lot of inspiration and there was a lot of just gratitude during that. But for me I don't think it's not enough to get me through. I don't know if that's normal, I don't know. I think your way is probably more rare than mine. If I had to guess, but I don't know, I would agree with that. I would agree with that.

Speaker 2

But I also have been and I do feel privileged in this, which is such a weird duality but I've been put under pressure my entire life. So bad things have been happening my entire life, so I don't know how to. The best way I can describe it is I playfully said this about Kev you think a marathon is going to take me down, man? That's nothing compared to what I've endured, and so there's something to that. But to bring it back to you, I wanted to ask you how do you? Okay? So you work six days a week. I mean, I never used to say this because I was way too much of a coward, but I'm really leaning into who the fuck I am.

Speaker 1

You already used up your F-bomb. I'm going to have to fine you now. A hundred biscuits. I'm going to need a hundred biscuits. My F-in no.

Speaker 2

Well, I never used to say this because I was too cowardly, but I really haven't taken a day off since my car accident. I've never taken a full day off since my car accident and I, I am personally proud of that. I just don't think that's anything else anyone else would be proud of. But I also don't know. Maybe maybe I'm projecting, but usually when I say it people are like what the hell is wrong with you? And and you know I playfully joke at Kevin's been on one vacation in eight years and Emil and I are going to the the lake this weekend. But I'm gonna work every day and and that's who I am and who I aspire to be. So my question for you is how do you explain to your wife that you like so, for example, in a world where a lot of people, if you look at the statistics, are working less and earning more, more privilege for less work? Let's just say that is that fair, like this generation has had more privilege for less effort, that's what technology does?

Speaker 2

I would say so yeah, all right, awesome, so we can actually say that us included.

Speaker 1

Yeah, of course 100, yeah 100.

Speaker 2

So how do you explain? I actually think about this. I don't know if I've ever talked to you about it, but I actually asked myself how does taron deal with being with him? And I don't mean that like I know you're worth it.

Speaker 1

I don't mean it in that way.

Speaker 2

I mean, how does she deal with being with a partner who works six days a week, every week, like, how do you explain to her why this is necessary? Because, honestly, it's not necessary. It's just what we do.

Speaker 1

Well, it's necessary for me, this is what I want, this is what I want, this is what I signed up for, this is what I want to do. I don't want to do anything else, so how?

Speaker 2

would you explain it? Because if you go back to the whole earn it and work ethic and you and I are very unique in the grit side of things and earning it I think I've talked to a lot of people from a lot of other countries and I don't want to be unkind to Americans. However, I do think the general consensus that I've gathered is that America seems entitled and we just have by far the biggest economy, and it's been that way for a long time. So it makes sense. I'm not trying to be unkind to us. However, I don't have whatever that entitled American thing is, and that's not my words, that's what I've been told. I was just on with someone from France earlier today, literally earlier today.

Speaker 1

Paul-Eve, francais today.

Speaker 2

Yeah, I've never been, but I will be at some point. How do you explain it to someone who doesn't want to work every day?

Speaker 1

You don't get to get what I get. Yeah, you don't get to get what I get. That's all and that's okay. I'm not saying that from an arrogant. I'm going to get whatever I want. I'm going to get what I work for, just like you're going to get what you work for. And I think the sooner we accept the fact that most likely, unless you are extremely blessed, nobody is coming to save you and you most likely are going to accumulate what you work for. That's how I always say it. Here's the thing I love the fact that you've worked every day for nine years. You have to work every day in order to get what you want and you know that. And I don't think you're ever going to be somebody who wakes up one day and regrets it. I genuinely don't believe that. I don't think you're ever going to regret it.

Speaker 2

I think you'll regret it. I regret the opposite, 100%.

Speaker 1

Yeah, I regret not giving my all, so I just know what you're doing isn't good for most people, just like what I'm doing isn't good for most people. That's why I never advise people do it. I don't think you should?

Speaker 1

Isn't there something in it that is, I think, maybe the example more than the specific? Yeah, so I work very diligently in what I believe in and the conversation I've tried to have with Taryn is I know right now it seems like we're losing, but everybody that we're and again, I don't mean this in an unkind way, it's just, unfortunately it tends to be the way it happens A lot of other people in their mid-30s Alan and I are 35 and about to be 36,. Alan, they have the house and they have the kids and they have the two cars and the quarter acre and the six-figure jobs and all that stuff. But it doesn't really get that much. Better from here, I think we're approaching a lot of people are approaching a peak. Better, from here, I think we're approaching a lot of people are approaching a peak when we're only 2% of the way to the journey. Maybe not even Alan would know better than I. This is 2%. Imagine what 90% would be like. But that's not going to be for another 50 years or whatever.

Speaker 2

Well, it'll be 2, eight, 16, 32 math numbers right, and I guess my question for you would be so for anyone out there listening or watching. If you don't aspire to what we aspire to, then please understand that you don't have to not take vacations.

Speaker 1

You, you can live whatever life, you can be a millionaire and take two vacations a year.

Speaker 2

Yeah, of course, if you play the game right 100% there's ways to earn more, work smarter, and if you do want to maximize your potential, you are going to have to put it all on the court and you are going to have to grow and improve and work. So so, if you do aspire to reach your true potential which I do think is kind of the root underneath this show in general is holistic potential health, wealth, life and love. How do you maximize your the? We all get one life. Let's make the most of it. I think that's underneath this, and you and I are going to have to be more honest as we get older and older and older on what this really took. And if you want what we want, like I tell Emilia all the time, I say sweetheart, we're very, I'm very grateful that we both work from home. That's amazing. My commute is 30 seconds now. I also work seven days a week and it's I work late almost every freaking night you can hear your office calling you, since it's not that far from your bedroom.

Speaker 2

So there's pros and cons to everything and I I really do believe that a lot of us are trying to get pros without the cons. And this, this Freestyle Friday. If we were to wrap this in a bow and give you something to take away, I think it would be. Are you fulfilled? And if not, why not? Maybe one of the reasons why you're not is because you know you're not giving your all. And I have a client who is more successful than most people by a significant margin, and he told me and he was very honest, which I really appreciate, his candor, because you can see it all over him I'm putting way more out on the court than he is and I can just tell I'm more fulfilled, even though he's more successful in certain things.

Speaker 2

Uh, I think hanging out gets romanticized. I don't think hanging out's as good as people think. I think it looks really good in the moment and then most of the time, it's the people in the arena, bloodied and battered, that are actually really living the dream. Uh, in most circumstances, not all. However, he said I'm only given 20%. I said, brother, that is not fulfilling. You're not going to be fulfilled doing that, so let's dial it up, and I think that's what we all really want, which is meaning. And I think meaning comes from growing, and I don't think you can grow without seriously, uh, challenging yourself and putting yourself under at least some pressure. Too much pressure is destructive. I understand that. I honestly think wpi for me might have been a little too much pressure. I almost cracked like a freaking wall. I'm not even kidding computer engineering was awful it was so freaking hard.

Speaker 2

I failed my first engineering class and I was straight a's physics award guy. So for me that was, and granted, I partied too much, but way too much. But I I had to grow and evolve from that, because it was either sink or swim, and and I there's something to be said for that, even though I know it can be destructive.

Speaker 1

Well, I think too much pressure is destructive and I think not enough pressure can be destructive just in a different way. It's destructive now, too much pressure, versus destructive eventually with not enough pressure. That's why it's so hard to do episodes like this, because the truth is, some of you need to work more. You just do. The other part of it is some of you need to practice self love more and you need to give yourself a little freaking grace and you shouldn't be as hard on yourself as you are and we are trying to drive to five. That's what drive to five means. It means if you're, if you're, working at a level one and you expect level 10 goals, you're gonna have to bump that number up, you know but if you're looking, at least one, a couple notches if you're, if you're working at level 10 and you're burning yourself out and your family hates you and you hate yourself and you're letting your body go to shit.

Speaker 1

You need to dial it back and you have to get reacquainted with what's really important to you, and that's why these episodes are so hard Now. We don't have time to do this now because we have to jump, but this would be a conversation maybe for a different day. What's we have to jump? But this would be a conversation maybe for a different day. What's the difference between maximizing your potential and optimizing your potential? Because maximizing suggests freaking, redlining it and right now you are freaking, redlining it, uh, maximizing.

Speaker 2

I know we don't have time we don't have time maximizing it is does not imply redlining it. If you understand, optimal means five. Okay, if I, if I'm redlining it at 10, that's actually not optimal. Therefore I'm not maximizing. So there's another layer underneath that that I think you might be missing most likely.

Speaker 2

That's why I have a 91 sleep score. Dude, you don't sleep 10 hours and redline I. I am redlining. However, for me. I do think I'm a little past five, but not that much. I'm actually in my learning zone, my, my constructive zone. You, unfortunately, when I'm in my constructive zone, sometimes you're in your panic zone. Yeah, and, and that makes sense, and we've tried to work on that, which is why I'm the CEO.

Speaker 1

Well, I think we've done a good job of I'm not as connected to you as I once was, yeah, in like what Alan is doing, kevin is doing. It's not like that as much anymore, which is good, Because that wasn't maximizing Kevin.

Speaker 2

That was actually hurting Kevin. It was deading Kevin. It was deading Kevin.

Speaker 1

It was deading, kevin, we got to go Next on the nation. As you know, and as we did the shout-outs in the beginning, we have a private Facebook group. It's all about growth. As of today, we have 751 members. I think. So if you're looking to get into a group of like-minded individuals, if you want to get into a grope, you can join. Next on the Nation, link will be to have you positive content every day. Good vibes, self-improvement that's what we all aspire to. That's why you listen to this podcast. So if you're looking for a group, that's the place to do it I had a all right, here we go.

Outro

Speaker 2

Okay, new review comes to our email now. Love it. My new secret weapon five stars, no matter how upbeat and positive you think you are. I added the thank you. Even the best of us can use a boost. All caps, caps, every once in a while. This has totally become my new secret weapon to give me that edge to take on the day, every day. Love what you guys are doing. Keep it up, guys. We shall, we will, we shall, we're gonna Thank you to you. You know who you are. Thank you for listening, thank you for that awesome review, and if you have not yet reviewed the show, please, please, please do. We appreciate it so much. It means a lot, and I read every single one, and so does Kev. So please, let us know. We appreciate it. We appreciate it very much as always.

Speaker 1

We love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, we will talk to you all tomorrow.

Speaker 2

Keep reaching your potential. Next up, my nation.

Speaker 1

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Speaker 2

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Speaker 1

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

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Alan Lazaros

Host
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Kevin Palmieri

Host