Is This A YOU Problem Or A THEM Problem? (1909)

What’s holding you back—your fears or your environment? In this episode, Kevin and Alan dive deep into the big question of self-worth. How do we navigate moments when we feel “not enough”? From avoiding challenges to falling into the comparison trap, they explore how empathy, self-awareness, and accountability unlock growth. With relatable insights and actionable tips, this conversation will challenge your mindset and motivate you to take bold, meaningful steps.

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Show notes:
(1:33) A gym encounter and self-worth dynamics
(6:38) Explanation of self-worth theory and its effects
(17:33) How environments shape self-perception and growth
(19:12) At NLU, we want you to win! So, we’re giving tools and resources to ensure your success. Join our Monthly Meet-up every first Thursday of the month at 5 PM. https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(28:07) Villainizing success and its consequences
(32:44) Finding balance in feedback and personal growth
(35:03) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri 0:00

evolution and real self-improvement is having the awareness and the empathy to say yeah, no. I can definitely see why when I was in the best shape of my life and I would be at a party and somebody would spill something and I would take my shirt off to clean it up and I was jacked where you would think I was an arrogant asshole. 100%, 100%. I can see that I fit all the boxes. Yeah, sure.

Alan Lazaros 0:27

The question becomes everyone out there, where is your self-worth? What do you tie your self-worth to? I know some people, so I tie some self-worth to dressing nice, looking well-kept, having my fingernails done Kev. You don't tie self-worth to any of that and that's okay. I'm not making that wrong.

Kevin Palmieri 0:47

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.

Alan Lazaros 0:52

And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.

Kevin Palmieri 0:55

At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros 1:01

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri 1:08

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros 1:24

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri 1:33

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1,909, is this a you problem or a them problem? I have to change something really quickly. Okay, so Alan and I were having a conversation before this because, again, when we're deciding what episodes to do, we're talking about what we're going through, we're talking about what we're learning, we're really thinking of what would be a valuable place to go in this episode, and Alan and I were talking about A time where Alan was in the gym and there was somebody that Alan used to be very close with, who saw Alan at the gym and literally ran away and ran out of the gym, and we were talking about how that made Alan feel bad initially, like, did I offend that person?

Kevin Palmieri 2:32

Does that person not like me anymore? What is going on? I don't know what the reasoning behind that, the reasoning under that is. And then we started to have a dialogue about it and I said well, now, with the understanding that you have, you can imagine that that person felt. Maybe it was insecure, maybe it was intimidated, maybe it was shame, maybe it was embarrassment, maybe it was regret, it might have been a lot of things, and you unintentionally made them feel a certain way and then their response unintentionally made you feel a certain way, and then their response unintentionally made you feel a certain way. And it becomes this weird thing where we think people feel a certain way about us or think a certain way about us, when in reality, it might not have anything to do with you or it might not have anything to do with what you've done. It might have more to do with what you represent to that person. This is always kind of a conversation I have in my head.

Kevin Palmieri 3:33

I often wonder what people think about me from my past who I haven't talked to for a long time, especially people that I was really close with at the beginning of this journey. Are they villainizing me? Do they think I'm arrogant? Now I'm thinking about that very often, and the reason I think about that is I don't talk to them anymore, so it's not like they have an accurate understanding of who I am because I don't. We don't talk anymore. They see me online and ultimately, ultimately, it's what do I represent to them? What is the relationship they have with the person that they see.

Kevin Palmieri 4:06

So I thought it would be a cool episode because I think when you start to understand that the way you react to something is not necessarily the way somebody else is going to react to something, you might be able to see how your reactions in the past have offended people, made people feel insecure, whatever it is, and then maybe you can sift through the stuff that's happened to you and say, oh my goodness, that time blank did this. I felt this way and I internalized it and I personalized it when in reality they were probably going through their own thing. Last thing, before I kick to Alan, we've said this many times this is from somebody else's social media. I did not come up with this, but it's an explanation, not an excuse. So again, I'm not saying that there's no ownership needed on either end, but I do think it's a cool conversation to have.

Alan Lazaros 4:53

So this person and I used to work out together Often and this person had lost, I want to say, 125 pounds or something like that. When we first started working out together, they were above 300 and they lost, I think, up to 125 or 150. I don't remember the exact number, but it was over a hundred. I know that because I remember them surpassing the a hundred pound mark and I continued on this fitness journey and certainly am not maybe in as good a shape as I was during my fitness coaching, fitness competition days, fitness modeling, but I've definitely progressed and this person as scared as I am to share this on a public medium, but it's anonymous has gained a lot of the weight back Not all of it, but a lot of it, and they definitely don't look as well, in my opinion, as they did when we were lifting together and working out together. And so the point of this is what if they were running away to not want to see me, not because they don't care about me or anything to do with me, to Kevin's point but what if they are just protecting their own self-worth? And I was watching a TED Talk this morning. I've been trying to do my learning every single day, first thing in the morning, I'll do my protein and my learning and the TED Talk. The name of it is Self-Worth Theory the Key to Understanding One second worth theory the key and under the key to understanding one second. Where's the title here? Self worth theory the key to understanding and overcoming procrastination. And it was done at Princeton University and it's this professor and he talked about self worth theory and I actually looked it up. Kevin and I both did.

Alan Lazaros 6:38

Self worth theory is a psychological theory that explains how a person's self esteem and sense of self-worth impact their behaviors, emotions and decisions, and we've talked about self-belief versus self-worth dozens, if not hundreds, of times on this podcast. The theory suggests that people are motivated to protect their self-worth by avoiding failure and striving for success. Here are some key aspects of self-worth theory Self-acceptance Self-worth theory suggests that people's main priority is to find self-acceptance, which can be achieved through achievement. Self-esteem Self-esteem is formed through a person's experiences, interactions and the feedback they receive from others. Perception of self Self-worth theory suggests that a person's ability to achieve is directly linked to the way they view themselves. Self-awareness we talk about that on the show all the time. Do you think you're a winner? Do you think you're a loser. That makes a big difference of whether or not you manifest that Protecting your self-worth. This is the piece I really want to land.

Alan Lazaros 7:30

People will often go to great lengths to protect their sense of self-worth, even if it negatively impacts the outcome of their achievement. Boom, I'm going to read that again because that's the practical thing for anyone watching or listening. People will often go to great lengths to protect their sense of self-worth, even if it negatively impacts the outcome of their achievement. So let's say that being around me and working out with me did help this person get in shape, and it definitely did. I have no problem saying that, regardless of whether or not this person would agree. I helped them tremendously in fitness.

Alan Lazaros 8:07

Him running away from me. I got offended at the time. It hurt me, I felt hurt, I felt saddened. I talked to Amelia about it. I was like I don't understand why, why?

Alan Lazaros 8:18

What this person was doing, I think, is they were protecting their self-worth and Kev's told me this for years. He said when people feel bad about themselves, the last thing they want to do is go feel even worse. They don't want to go into environments where and again, I do want to share this from two frames. There have been times in my life where I've been very out of shape and very unhappy and very unfulfilled and very, very not fit, very not athletic, and I've been around people that are crushing it and I've felt worse about me around them. So I've been on that side of the equation before and it definitely doesn't feel good. However, for me and this is where I want you to jump in after for me that was always very motivating. So my fitness coach that I used to work out with was leagues ahead of me. I mean, it wasn't close. That was very motivating for me, what Kev has tried to help me understand.

Alan Lazaros 9:18

He said some people, if they don't have self-belief and they don't believe they can change it, have self-belief and they don't believe they can change it. It's just a big mirror, it's just pain, and people would rather not go in environments that make them feel worse about themselves. And so for everyone out there watching or listening, ask yourself this simple question of you have certain paths you have to take in life, certain things you have to do, certain rooms you have to be in to achieve your goals, but if you're spending your life trying to protect your self-worth, you might be avoiding the very people or the very mirrors that you need to actually achieve those goals. And so it's almost like you can choose to protect your self-worth in the moment or you can choose to actually achieve your goals in the long term. And I think a lot, of, a lot of why we don't achieve our goals is because we're trying to protect our own self-worth. We don't want to put ourselves in environments where we're not the smartest or we're not in shape or we're not as capable as other people.

Alan Lazaros 10:21

I have one client who said I'm too much for my past friends and they don't get along with me well anymore. But I'm not enough yet to be friends with people like you. Yet and he's a client we're not friends. I'm his coach. That's called Lonely Land. You're too much for the people you used to spend time with, who aren't willing to maybe take that next courageous leap of faith, or maybe they don't want to, but you're not enough yet to be the thing that you get feedback on. Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri 11:16

And I think that's why you need permission to give feedback.

Kevin Palmieri 11:20

Here's the thing you don't, if you don't know your feedback for someone else, it doesn't matter whether or not you have permission. If you, just being a human being, makes other people feel some type of way which it will sometimes it'll be inspired, other times it might be jealous, or other times it might be scared or intimidated. Whatever it is, it depends. It depends on the person. You can't really control that necessarily. This is what I was thinking. I want you to think of someone who is not currently confident in their body and if we think of it as kind of a spectrum, okay, version one doesn't feel confident in their body, so they don't go to the beach at all. That's version one. Version two goes to the beach but wears sweatpants and a sweatshirt and they don't take off any of their street clothes for lack of better phrasing. Okay, that's version two. Version three is somebody who goes to the beach and wears the most covering swim outfit they can. Again, I don't want to get into specifics, because number one I don't know, but let's just say it's a woman and it's a very covering one piece with the thought of I want to cover as much of my body as humanly possible Because I know style and I don't know. I don't know what's in. And then the next one might be somebody who has more confidence and wears a more revealing swimsuit. And then the last person might be somebody who loves to go to the beach and loves to be in a bathing suit, because they feel like they look really good and they get significance from that. But you can see how somebody who is struggling to go to the beach because they're thinking I'm going to wear my sweatshirt and my sweatpants the whole time Somebody that walks up who is in really good shape might make them feel a certain way about themselves, even without trying. It could be the kindest person in the world who just walks by and is having a good time. It might make you feel a certain way about yourself and that's a very dangerous game because then you might villainize that person and say, oh, that person's probably stuck up or that person's this, and I think the best example of this is money.

Kevin Palmieri 13:43

I was watching, so Taryn and I Taryn got home late last night and she brought me home food and I ate my dinner, and then I went and laid in bed and we snuggled for a little bit and she likes to fall asleep on me and I was watching this video of this guy. I don't know who he is, I gotta do more research, but he has a $30 million car collection. And then he went to his house and walked through his gym and then thought, shot a three-pointer in his gym like, my goodness, you have some money, sir. But curious, kev. I went to the comments of the youtube video. I wanted to see what people are saying and there was not a single person who villainized him. Not one why and?

Kevin Palmieri 14:27

everybody because he was a down-to-earth, humble guy who talked about how lucky he was to be where he was. Just a just seemed like a regular dude. That type of person, I think, is really probably helping a lot of people rebuild their relationship with money without even knowing it, has no idea, he doesn't even know he's doing it where other people who flex on social media and say if you don't make, if you make like grant cardone said this once. I'm calling him out if you make less than four hundred thousand dollars a year or something, you should be embarrassed. It's like grant grant. That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard in my life.

Kevin Palmieri 15:07

Whether he knows it or not, I don't know, but there's a lot of people who that's messing their relationship up with money even worse. And now they're going to villainize people who have money because there's this asshole who's saying if you don't make X amount, you're a loser and you're not good for your family. It's like so much of this is unconscious, so much of this is running under the scenes and we don't even realize it, and then we start villainizing things. To Alan's point, that would be really beneficial If there's somebody out there who has a course on how to make more money and they're aligned and they're heart driven and they're proven and they're real and they're authentic and they're a good human. But you see that and say that's, that's wrong. This person has money, they don't need any more. That could end up hurting you in some way, shape or form, especially if one of your goals is to be financially free. Right, if that's what success means to you in some way.

Alan Lazaros 15:58

I want to explain something that I think would help everyone, because when I first figured this out and this really landed for me, it changed my relationship with money forever, and I know that's not the point of this episode, but I was outside the gym yesterday and I saw a bank that was closed down and there was this forklift machine working on the building. No one was in it last night, it was empty, and I remember thinking to myself and this is how my brain works, so I just want to share this. So so someone bought that forklift machine for I don't know, probably 50 grand. Okay, they probably borrowed the money from the bank to buy it and then are paying a monthly payment for that. Probably the monthly payment is about $1,000 a month. So that person needs to make $1,000, more than $1,000 per month on average in order to make a profit off of that machine. What if there's no demand? What if that person doesn't have demand? What if no one's coming to them? Hey, can you redo my roof? Hey, can you? I don't know what these things do, so I can't talk intelligently about this, but hey, can you come fix my bank building or whatever it is right.

How environments shape self-perception and growth

Alan Lazaros 17:17

Money is the tool that enables you to live and be productive in the world. You stop villainizing money, in a way. So so, and then this comes down to back to the original point of the episode, which is what's your relationship with money and what's your relationship with yourself with money? Which is, what's your relationship with money and what's your relationship with yourself with money? Because, to make the point, land with the money thing in the example, with that machine, the bank benefits because they get interest from the loan that they gave the person. The person benefits because, let's say, they make $1,500 and they pay $1,000, so that's $500 profit. And now they have work. The building that is getting redone by this new forklift is now benefiting. This is how you construct the world. I wonder all the time how do these cities get built?

Alan Lazaros 18:23

Isn't it wild. It's wild how much human beings have built. It's crazy. Who Isn't it wild? It's wild how much human beings have built. It's crazy. Who owns that building? Well, the truth is, a bank owns that building and someone who owns that building quote unquote owes the bank $50 million and pays a million a month. And then whoever works in that building is leasing and spending you know, I don't know 50 g's each in each office. So so it's all.

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Alan Lazaros 18:53

Once you realize how money works, you won't villainize it anymore. That's point one. Point two is if you don't believe in your own ability to produce money, you are going to villainize people who have it unconsciously anyway, because it's going to affect your self-worth. Nlu listener, what is happening? I just wanted to jump in here and let you know if you want to get to the next level faster. We have a free virtual monthly meetup at the first Thursday of every month. You can connect with like-minded people and become a bigger part of this amazing global community. The link to register will be in the show notes.

Alan Lazaros 19:33

I think that self-belief can lead to self-worth if you do it right. The reason why I think I had lower self-worth than what I would have liked to have had is because of relationships with other people, not my relationship with myself. So, for example, if you were to work out with Kevin and I and you were to have not weight trained almost at all over the last decade, you're going to really have a hard time. We're going to be kind to you and we're going to help you and we're going to support you, and there's going to be a part of me that's like, honestly, this is kind of holding me back a bit. I'm here to do it, but I'm not a fitness coach, so I'm gonna want to go do my own thing. To be completely honest, however, we're not gonna make you feel bad, but you might just feel bad in general. I'll never forget this.

Alan Lazaros 20:17

I had a executive admin early on. Her name was amy and we were working out. It was me, emilia, bianca I don't think you were there and and bianca for those you don't know, she's, uh, of all ventures with Emilia and she's been working out for a very long time power lifting, bodybuilding, all of it and and Amy and Bianca worked out together. Emilia and I worked out together, same gym, same time, and I could tell Amy was freaking out because, the truth is, bianca's being held back because Amy's not as competent and Amy is having a really big mirror, because not only are there mirrors all around, but Bianca's in really good shape and Bianca's also a very, very attractive female and so and very strong, right, exactly, and so at the end of it, but but there are people that would wipe the walls with Bianca.

Alan Lazaros 21:03

So there's levels to everything. This is next level you. So, in order to get to the next level, you kind of have to. That was beneficial for Amy to be in that room with us. However, if her self-worth took a huge hit and that wasn't actually motivating but yet demoralizing, now I understand why someone might avoid that situation. And if Bianca wants to help Amy in that circumstance, bianca is going to wants to help Amy in that circumstance, bianca's going to have to go and support her at her level rather than kind of make the contrast really big and that kind of thing. So the question becomes Everyone out there, where is your self-worth? What do you tie your self-worth to? I know some people so I tie some self-worth to dressing nice, looking well-kept, having my fingernails done Kev. You don't tie self-worth to any of that and that's okay. I'm not making that wrong Very little.

Kevin Palmieri 21:59

You show up in a hoodie, very little. I feel slightly different when I've just gotten my hair done Slightly.

Alan Lazaros 22:10

It's slightly different when I've just gotten my hair done slightly not it's measurable, but not drastic was what I would say right. And what car I drive doesn't affect my self-worth very much a little, a little. I like the tesla a lot better. We were in a little nissan rental down in south carolina. I was like, oh, this is a step back, holy crap. But it's not affecting my self-worth that much, whereas if I were in a hoodie, with a hat, that would affect me. I it wouldn't feel aligned for me.

Alan Lazaros 22:34

I'm not making this wrong for you the the the point here, the the the the point here is every one of us ties our self-worth and self-esteem to different things, and and one thing that I really want to make land in this episode is people always say, well, don't tie your self-worth to how you look. And then they say don't tie your self-worth to how much money you make and don't tie your self-worth to what home you're in and don't tie your self-worth to your relationship and don't tie your self-worth to being in shape or not. Listen, I got to be very, very honest with everybody. There's a reason why I'm in better self-care than Kev, because I tie my self-worth to it. There's a reason he'll always have a nicer car than me because he ties his self-worth to it. Now, that can be toxic if you overdo it, for sure.

Alan Lazaros 23:16

But there is some correlation. When Kevin's making more money, earning more money, he is in a better mood. When you're more jacked, you're always in a better mood. You have so much of your value tied up in these things and, by the way, all human beings do.

Alan Lazaros 23:32

There are some human beings that literally feel terrible about themselves if they don't make at least five hundred thousand dollars a year. That is true for some people. I know some of them. There are also some people who are totally fine being completely out of shape and they don't. It doesn't bother them at all. I have one client I literally said does it bother you that you're not in like really, really good shape? He's like, no, not really. I said well then, don't put level 10 effort in it because he's trying to. He's like, well, I want to be, I want to lose 20 pounds, and it just wasn't happening. Wasn't happening, wasn't happening, wasn't happening. I'm like, dude, do you really care? He's like, no, not really. I'm like well, then, why are you trying to set a level 10 goal with level 2 caring? And so the whole point of this is what is your self-worth tied to and what are the person's, places, things and ideas that you might be avoiding that are actually necessary to achieve a goal that would actually increase your self-worth long term.

Kevin Palmieri 24:24

One thing I want to add before we get out of here, because I was thinking of this when you were talking. I think empathy is the answer, because there's two ways to look at it. Somebody who doesn't have a lot of money it's very easy to villainize somebody who does have a lot of money. That villainizes somebody who doesn't have a lot of money. And it becomes this freaking cycle of, of course.

Kevin Palmieri 24:50

Of course, if I was, let's say, I was somebody who was grinding my face off, going to a job that I hate every day and I was making $62,000 a year. And then I see that post from Grant Cardone saying if you make 400, less than $400,000 a year, and then I see that post from Grant Cardone saying if you make less than $400,000 a year, you are doing your family a disservice and you should be sad for yourself. I'm going to villainize him for sure, for sure. And then, when I villainize him, he's going to villainize me and say, yep, you're exactly the type of person who needs to see this post. And it becomes this cycle when I think evolution and real self-improvement is having the awareness and the empathy to say, yeah, no.

Kevin Palmieri 25:38

I can definitely see why when I was in the best shape of my life and I would be at a party and somebody would spill something and I would take my shirt off to clean it up and I was jacked where you would think I was an arrogant asshole. 100%, 100%. I can see that I fit all the boxes. Yeah, sure, 100%. Just like I can see somebody who has never been out of shape. Look at someone who is out of shape and say, well, they're lazy and they don't care, and they just don't try and blah, blah, blah.

Alan Lazaros 26:10

Now hold on here's the thing.

Kevin Palmieri 26:12

Hold on, okay, hold on, hold on. It can be true. Some people that take their we'll use my example that get drunk at parties and when somebody spills stuff, they take their shirt off immediately so people can see how jacked they are. They probably are arrogant and sometimes they are arrogant and they're not kind and they're full of themselves and all that stuff, just like. Yes, there are some people who are not in shape because they make excuses and they don't stay disciplined and they don't get any feedback and they don't set goals and they watch Netflix all day. Yes, that's a set of humans on both ends, but I do think empathy is the answer for someone who is trying to lean more into self-improvement, self-awareness, and I can understand why somebody would be offended, intimidated, villain, or me particularly, and I think that helps me. That helps me understand in a lot of different ways. So that's what I want to end with well, the.

Alan Lazaros 27:17

The last thing I would share is there's a way to flip this script to make it constructive for you. If you see kev rip his shirt off to clean something up and he's jacked, I remember playing bags with you way back and you basically weren't breathing because your abs were popping.

Kevin Palmieri 27:34

I got really good at breathing with my abs flexed. That was like a skill.

Alan Lazaros 27:39

You did, and I remember thinking like damn, and that was inspiring for me. Should Kevin be less to make me feel better? No. Does Kevin have to go out of his way to try to feel superior to me? No. And should I villainize Kevin for being in shape? No, because if I do, I'm less likely to be in shape.

Alan Lazaros 28:07

This is one of the things that I really, really, really struggle to articulate. You're never going to work hard to become something you villainize, so you have to be very careful with what you villainize. In other words, if you are villainizing money as the problem, you're not going to pursue and work hard to earn money. So instead of villainizing money, you need to try to villainize someone who puts people down. For me, I villainize bullies. That's the only villain. That I think is a villain Is anyone who is trying to make someone else feel less than so that they can feel more than I cannot stand bullies and other than that. These other things like being in shape or earning a lot of money, or having a large team, or being attractive or taking good care of yourself or wearing nice clothes a lot of that stuff is actually very positive, and when I realized and learned that you cannot inspire someone without ever triggering any envy. That's when I really started to lean into who I really am, because I do have a very enviable lifestyle. I work from home, I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the entire world, I have a magnificent relationship, I have my own business, we make lots of money, we have an amazing team, we have lots of status and credibility and I have tons of clients and we have this Wonderful life, this dream life, and we earn it every single day. But it's impossible for me to inspire someone without also having, and leading by example, the things that might be actually quite a mirror. And the very last piece of this is anytime you're villainizing someone else or something else, try really hard to ask yourself am I just trying to protect my self-worth from the truth? Because if I am, I might not actually face the fact that you know what, maybe I'm not that good at earning money and maybe I need to get better at that. Or maybe I'm not that in shape and maybe I really do want to be in better shape. Maybe I could get a personal trainer. Because every time you protect your self-worth, you're also potentially potentially protecting yourself from the growth that that could really improve that, because if you can't change it, you have to learn how to love it and accept it. I understand that, but if you can change it, if you can improve it, and you constantly are just avoiding mirrors, avoiding mirrors, avoiding mirrors, protecting, protecting, protecting.

Alan Lazaros 30:37

Running out of the gym who knows that person who ran out of the gym going to the beginning of this episode? I probably would have benefited them by the conversation we would have had. I think that conversation would have been inspiring. I think I would have uplifted that person. I think that they could have learned something from me and I do think that they would have been more motivated the next day. But they would have had to take the pain in the moment and ultimately maybe that's not true, maybe it would have been totally detrimental.

Alan Lazaros 31:01

Maybe that's me with high self-belief, not knowing, but what I do know is that you can't spend your whole life trying to just protect your current self-image and your current self-worth, because if you do that, you're basically shutting yourself off from being in rooms with people that that can really help lift you up and teach you and guide you, and and we all need mentors and coaches and you're never gonna, you're never gonna grow if you're not around people that are incredible.

Alan Lazaros 31:28

That's the number one thing 95% of your success or failure, based on a Harvard research study is your reference group, and if your reference group makes you feel less than that sucks. But it also is super important. My my client, bianca, says when I'm around you and Emilia, it's very hard for me sometimes to feel good about myself, but it also motivates the hell out of me, and so you got to figure out who and what all of this means for you and then try to turn the the tide in a direction that's actually going to help you achieve your dreams, because ultimately, you don't want to get to the end of your life and realize you know what? I avoided all feedback and I never achieved anything great because I was a big fish in a small pond who just kept running away all the time.

Kevin Palmieri 32:10

Well, you just got to find the. You have to find the, the productive amount, right. If you give a plant not enough water, it dies, and if you give a plant too much water, it drowns. You need to find the right, the right amount. And then again, I don't know anything about plants, so this is a total assumption. But I'm guessing that as a plant grows it can absorb more water. So maybe the amount of water that you give it today would have killed it if you gave it to it when it was just a little seedling. That's the ultimate goal.

Alan Lazaros 32:44

And then different types of plants need different amounts of water. So different types of humans.

Kevin Palmieri 32:48

The plant cast. Plant cast Next level plant cast. That's the next one. Today we have a ficus. This ficus is of the leafy variety. We have a fake ficus tree and somebody. I did a post and you could see it and they reached out and they said that is a beautiful ficus. And I said number one, thank you. Number two, his name is Frank and number three, frank is fake.

Kevin Palmieri 33:13

So that's why he looks so good, he's fake AF. All right. Next level nation. If you never want to miss an opportunity to get to the next level, if you are somebody who loves self-improvement although at times it is hard, although at times the mirrors are challenging make sure you are subscribed so you never miss an opportunity to get to the next level. Can I promise some of the things that we say won't trigger you? No, I cannot, but what I can promise is everything we talk about all the time is always from a place of the heart. That's why we say we're heart-driven, but no BS. Heart-driven but no BS means we want to tell you the truth based on what we think. The truth is based on what has worked for us, based on what we've studied, but we want to do it from the heart, and that's because we care. So if you're into that, make sure you subscribe so you never miss an opportunity to level up.

Alan Lazaros 34:04

I have so many clients who have said that I'll do more for others than I will for myself. If you feel like that is you. We let ourselves down all the time. If you had someone waiting in the gym tomorrow, sitting there waiting for you and it was someone you cared about, who you didn't want to let down, you'd show up and that workout would help you. That's what coaching is I have. I have one client who has done. She just got to 70 YouTube videos. I think she's done 40 since we were coaching together and not one of them she would have done for herself. She's doing it to win at coaching. She says. The point that I'm making is that accountability is powerful and without it, we will consistently let ourselves down and break the promises to ourselves. I will hold you accountable and that's the power of coaching. When you have skin in the game and you pay to play and it's pay as you go cancel any time. No long-term commitment reach out. I'd love to help.

Kevin Palmieri 35:03

As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you at NLU. We don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Alan Lazaros 35:11

Talk to you soon.

Kevin Palmieri 35:14

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros 35:21

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri 35:30

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.