Next Level University

Do You Have To Be COLD To Be “Calculated”? (1927)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Unlock the secrets to harnessing your decision-making power without compromising your warmth. In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan explore why people associate strategic thinking with a lack of emotion and how to break that stereotype. Discover the secrets to blending warmth with competence, why intent matters in leadership, and how to avoid common financial traps. Whether you’re a dream chaser or just looking to level up, this episode offers practical advice for making smarter, kinder choices.

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Show notes:
(2:42) Book insights: Strength Vs. Warmth
(4:21) Calculating probabilities and cognitive biases
(11:36) Leveraging credit cards effectively
(17:07) At NLU, we want you to win! So, we’re giving tools and resources to ensure your success. Join our Monthly Meet-up every first Thursday of the month at 5 PM. https://bit.ly/49SyVHz
(20:25) Manipulative marketing tactics versus authentic influence
(27:09) Balancing competence and warmth for better relationships
(29:53) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Kevin Palmieri

They give you $200, you bet all the $200, and then you win $1,000. And you just made $1,000. But then you have to have the understanding to take the money out and never gamble again, which no one is doing.

Alan Lazaros

If you're really, really savvy, you can use a credit card for something called leverage, which means if you give me a hundred bucks and I make 150 and then I give you 30 of it, I still netted 20 with your money. That's what we did in business, and even us. I think we were stupid. I think we should do better. Now, when I say stupid, I don't mean stupider than anyone else, I mean stupider than we could be Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success Self-improvement in your pocket every day, from anywhere completely free.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University, Next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1927, do you have to be cold to be calculated? So I am not allowed to go to book club. I've never been invited to book club. In fact, I am actually locked out. They lock the door behind them. I can't even get into book club, Even if I wanted to. I wouldn't even know how to.

Kevin Palmieri

But Alan said there was a very deep conversation in book club about the connection of calculation, or being calculated, and being cold and I thought that would be a cool episode because I think it's. I mean, this is an awareness thing and we've often talked, talked about what's your relationship with money, what's your relationship with fitness, what's your relationship? This is another one of those examples of if your relationship with somebody who is calculated means that they're cold, the likelihood of you becoming more calculated and we can kind of go into that is probably pretty low and there's some benefits of being calculated. So I'll kick it to you because it was your idea let's keep the monologue to a minimum of 60 minutes, please. How many 60 minutes?

Alan Lazaros

please, oh, okay, yeah, I'll keep it under an hour. Thank you, sir. So do you remember way back I was reading a book one of our mentors at the time recommended we were down in Florida. It was when we lived in Florida and I talked about Strength vs Warmth.

Kevin Palmieri

Ooh, yes, yes. What's the name of this book? Yes, it's decent.

Alan Lazaros

The Strength vs Warmth thing is world class. Yes, it's decent, the strength versus warmth thing is world class. But the book was kind of garbage.

Kevin Palmieri

You remember what it was called? Let me think on it. It was a whole series. This person had a whole series of. I'll find out.

Alan Lazaros

Okay. Well, so there's this concept about strength and warmth, and I was watching an interview. As all of you know, now my YouTube escapades in 2024. I was watching an interview.

Kevin Palmieri

Compelling people, yes, compelling people, yes, nice, compelling people, the hidden qualities that make us influential by, please hold, please hold, john Neffinger and Matthew Kohut.

Alan Lazaros

There's some valuable insights in there, for sure, definitely, but again, not my favorite book, the one insight in there that I think is really valuable here in the context of this. So number one shout out to amy. She was on book club and we were talking about the cognitive biases. The art of thinking clearly is the book we're reading in book club and we were talking about calculating probabilities. It's called probability. Error is one of the biases. Basically, being more afraid of planes than cars is just mathematically silly. But most people are afraid of planes more than cars. Right? Kevin's one of them. He raises his hand. I calculated it You're 121 times more likely to die in a car than a plane.

Kevin Palmieri

Strong numbers. I watched Taryn go home from work one day last week and I was in the bedroom watching something on planes.

Alan Lazaros

I was like I'm studying one in 12 million, according to the person that said it so I want to make this as clear as possible too the 121 times more likely to die in a car than you are, statistically, than you are in a plane. That's with the little planes, like the non-commercial, like the little, like those, and that's where the majority. So I looked it up yesterday 358 plane crashes deaths. Uh, last year I think and again, don't quote me on this, I did it quick, well, in book club, so don't quote me on any of this, but in my very quick mathematical research I just wanted to see how irrational it was to you get in your car every day, totally cool, not afraid at all, but yet planes I actually told a story about bianca almost crushing your hand.

Alan Lazaros

Yes, when the turbulence and in your defense that was a little bit bianca is very, very strong. She, uh, that time on the way home from florida was that was a. That was the most turbulence I've ever experienced in a plane.

Kevin Palmieri

That was pretty bad yeah, yeah, it was not good.

Alan Lazaros

That was not a fan I went into rationality, I went um I think same, we're gonna be fine, I need they test.

Kevin Palmieri

They test where, like, they can literally like bend the wings almost all the way up. Those wings can handle an extreme amount.

Alan Lazaros

Shout out to my client Heather Pilot Was a chief pilot. She knows the things. She reached out last time I talked about planes. Okay. So my point of all that Amy said there's something about. So we were obviously calculating probabilities and so I'm considered very calculated and I I asked everyone how often do you calculate probabilities? Because for me I'm always like what's the problem? What's the statistical probability of success in this circumstance, best case, worst case, most probable case, what are the chances? And, amy, you know, isn't it interesting how people associate calculated with cold? And there's this movie that's about a robot. Megan Fox plays the robot or whatever, and I don't know anything about the movie. I just was on IMDB and I saw a little something when I was looking up a movie we're going to watch, Little Women. It was pretty good, pretty good again again, for for film lovers, I think it's powerful, especially for empowered women. I mean, it's, it's very good, but anyways. So megan fox is a robot in that film and apparently it's like freaking people out or something because she's so calculated and she's so cold there's no emotion

Alan Lazaros

she's a robot, okay. Well, the point that I'm making is I think people associate cold with calculated, because robots are calculated and human beings are too. I mean, everyone's calculating everything. You just might not know that you are. So every one of us has a cost value analysis in our head of why we're wearing this hat. Why am I wearing this hat? Why did I choose blue? Okay, well, I like blue. Okay, well, why. Why am I wearing the next of a whole foundation? Well, we have an event later and we want to represent. So everything you do is calculated. It's just mostly done with your subconscious and your unconscious, and what we're trying to do in this podcast shout out to the old hyperconscious podcast is bring your subconscious and unconscious up to the surface and then go oh wow, I'm calculating some pretty unintelligent things. So my point of all this is just because it's calculated doesn't mean it's cold, you can, and Kevin said this. He said I think people associate calculated with being manipulative.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, I don't think people associate it with robots. Oh, is that just me? I think so. When I think cold and calculated, I don't think people associate it with robots oh, is that just? Me. I think so when I think cold and calculated. I don't think robots.

Alan Lazaros

Oh, have you seen Ex Machina.

Kevin Palmieri

No.

Alan Lazaros

It's world class.

Kevin Palmieri

I've heard great things about it, but I just. I don't really watch movies anymore. I watch series, we watch. There's a show called Carry On. Supposed to be great Meh, it was okay.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, not doing it.

Kevin Palmieri

The problem I have with movies is essentially you know what's going to happen from the first scene. The main character never dies, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever other than Titanic, but like other, ever, ever, ever, other than titanic, but like other than that. I'm sure you could probably count on maybe, maybe I won't say that because 300 the main characters die, but like there's a lot of movies where the main character dies. Brother, yeah, but you kind of know they're gonna die 300, 300.

Alan Lazaros

You want to argue with me about the?

Kevin Palmieri

merits of film. I will argue with you about fucking anything. Dude shows are just longer films, son. Shorter films, son.

Alan Lazaros

No, no, no Longer films yeah but it's Mike Will. Shorter films within longer films.

Kevin Palmieri

So I can watch an episode and I can be done for the night.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, no, it is more practical. I understand.

Kevin Palmieri

It's more practical.

Alan Lazaros

I'm sorry sorry, I swear at you, I just love film I I support it you can uh, I support what do we? Call it f right off with that. Yeah, yeah, we're gonna see this, we?

Kevin Palmieri

this is a problem when we say we're gonna, we were talking about swearing. After the last episode, we're like I don't know, do we want to swear?

Kevin Palmieri

should we edit it out. Now there's too much uncertainty. Now there's too much uncertainty. Now I'm now I don't know if I should swear at all. I I don't think it's from robots, I think it's from the fact that, okay, so think about this. We talked about this recently.

Kevin Palmieri

Online gambling is an epidemic in the us and it's going to continue to get worse and worse and worse. A thousand percent. It's too easy to put invisible money on things that aren't real. It's too easy. I saw a commercial recently where they said all new sign-ups get $200 in bonus bets. $200? I could win a million with that $200 for free. It would cost me anything. I'm in, where do I sign? I didn't really. But then you start thinking about it. It's like, okay, well, why are they giving away $200? Well, they must have determined that the lifetime value of a new customer is way, way, way, way, way more than $200. So, best case scenario they give you $200, you bet all the $200, and then you win $1,000. And you just made $1,000. But then you have to have the understanding to take the money out and never gamble again, yep, which no one is doing.

Alan Lazaros

Especially not if you fall for the original $200. 100%, that's the paradox.

Kevin Palmieri

And then worst case scenario, by the way, that's not actually $200.

Alan Lazaros

It's $0. $0 to them.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, right, okay.

Alan Lazaros

So now that you're a business owner. How cool is this to never get it.

Kevin Palmieri

But, yeah. But how calculated is it? That they know all of these numbers and they can make it seem like it's a good idea for you to do it, even though it is a terrible idea for you to do it.

Alan Lazaros

Yes, and this is. I was on with a client yesterday and she said I have two credit cards and one of them and I said what's the interest rate? Because we're just listen, you just gotta be smart. That's it Like which over one has the highest interest rate, let's pay that one first. Done 30.1%. I said that is fucking criminal. That is criminal.

Kevin Palmieri

Now what is that? Okay, explain that. What does 30%? Do you know like the APR and how that all works? I don't understand what APR is and it basically.

Alan Lazaros

So essentially, what's happening is, if you the best way to describe it is every dollar you spend on that credit card, you're only getting to spend 70 of it, uh, 70 cents of it. So let's do this you spend a hundred dollars on that credit card, you really only get 70 of it. They're just make, they're just taking 30 right off the top of every 70.

Alan Lazaros

You it's the it's the easiest way to think about it and again that we can do an episode on that another time if you, if you're curious, I'm trying to get better at communicating math.

Kevin Palmieri

I feel like it's valuable Because I think that it's criminal.

Alan Lazaros

I mean that's brutal, it's criminal.

Kevin Palmieri

Now.

Alan Lazaros

If you're really, really savvy, you can use a credit card For something called leverage, which means, if you give me 100 bucks and I make 150 and then I give you 30 of it, I still netted 20 with your money. That's what we did in business, and even us. I think we're stupid.

Kevin Palmieri

I think we should do better Now, when.

Alan Lazaros

I say stupid, I don't mean stupider than anyone else. I mean stupider than we could be Okay, and I always realize that I lose credibility all the time. It's like I don't think we're stupid, I don't I just, I just think it's stupid things, because we made better decisions.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, we could have. You always could have. We could have made way better decisions, yeah, of course, but we made better decisions than all not all, but most other business owners. I don't think we're statistically stupid or anything. I think we didn't do as well as we could have and I'm always gonna think that, because that's the truth. Okay, back to the point.

Alan Lazaros

I said this to her. I said two things. One, that's criminal, I'm so sorry, and that's the one we pay off first. Number two here's the thing, here's the problem. You still used the card like that's on you, because that's what's within your control. Now, are they educating people? Are they making? No, they are calculating that and they know you're going to use it. And my mentor said the credit card companies are lining their pockets with your ignorance Not my ignorance, but like the collective you. Now, if you don't know numbers, start learning them now, because your future will just immediately get brighter. The people who said I love math and how much money they made, it would be nuts 80% of the world's wealth. I believe my theory is in the hands of people who grew up saying I love math. That's just my truth. Now, that said, that's not what this episode's about. This is about calculation. This episode is about being cold and calculated. What if you're warm and calculated? Okay, that gambling fucking website is cold and calculated.

Kevin Palmieri

You're taking advantage of people. It's not even just one.

Alan Lazaros

NLU is calculated, but for good, it's not calculations, that's the problem, it's what you do with it. And so I actually coach a woman named Hannah and she's the GM of a pet store and we are crushing it. She's like, well, I need to hit this number in order to get this bonus at this time. Win, win, win, awesome, wonderful person. I said you know what's really cool about this? You have all the advantages of my brain, with none of the disadvantages of being hated. It's funny, right? Because it's so true. It's like let me just give you the cheat codes. I can her successful Easier than I can make me successful in some ways, because, unfortunately, I turn people off Because they are triggered by my calculation brain.

Kevin Palmieri

That's very interesting.

Alan Lazaros

Well, that's an advantage you have too. I'll give you my brain, and then you go be Kev.

Kevin Palmieri

Put it inside of my head. I'm trying I'd run away. See you later, man. I'm trying I'd run away.

Alan Lazaros

See you later man, I'm out, I'm out.

Kevin Palmieri

Now I have the computer. I was going to say something that was probably super valuable. Maybe the most valuable thing that's ever been said in this podcast Slipped my mind, that's really unfortunate. As my grandmother would say. It must have been a lie. That's what Mima used to say, anytime I'd forget something or she'd forget something. It must have been a lie. It's like where did you get that from?

Alan Lazaros

How long have you been saying that, Mims? How long have you been saying that? Shout out to Mima and your mom for donating to the Next Level Hope Foundation.

Kevin Palmieri

Alan says Kevin is overly charitable. That is where I get it from. I get it from my mom and my grandmother, for sure.

Alan Lazaros

I'm just saying, calculated charity is better than reckless charity, that's all I'm saying, one of NLU goes down Kev we don't get to be generous. No, no, I understand.

Kevin Palmieri

One of my goals. Again, this is going to be potentially highly unrelatable and maybe sound arrogant. I'll throw that trigger out there. I want to. I have an amount in my mind that I'd like to donate in my lifetime. That's how focused on donation I am, but you have to make a certain amount here's the thing, you gotta make a certain amount of money to donate that it's gotta be a lot more than that.

At NLU, we want you to win! So, we're giving tools and resources to ensure your success. Join our Monthly Meet-up every first Thursday of the month at 5 PM.

Alan Lazaros

This is what I was gonna say. Nlu, listener, what is happening? I just wanted to jump in here and let you know. If you want to get to the next level faster. We have a free virtual monthly meetup at the first Thursday of every month. You can connect with like-minded people and become a bigger part of this amazing global community. The link to register will be in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Strap in because this is going to be the most valuable thing you've ever heard in your entire freaking life. Cold and calculated, I think. Think suggests I am going alan was quite literally taken aback by what I said. I'm quite literally going to reverse engineer how to get an outcome regardless of your feelings or well-being that's cold and calculated.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, I think warm and calculated is how do I get Alan to sign up for this thing that I know will be supremely beneficial for him, and I know there's almost no downside and I know he'll thank me for it eventually, that's positive intent and leadership versus manipulation it's influence.

Kevin Palmieri

People hear influence and think it's a bad thing. Potentially. There's a book called Influence by Robert Cialdini. Alan recommended to me a long time ago. I really like it because it highlights both sides. Yeah, it highlights both sides. There's a is it a religious group? Karishnas, something like that. They used to stay at the airport I think they probably still do and when you're walking by they would give you a flower and they say it's totally free, you don't need anything, you don't have to give us anything. But after you took the flower then they would ask you for donations or something.

Kevin Palmieri

And since they gave you something. There's a bias called the Reciprocation bias. Reciprocation bias, which means if somebody gives something to you, you feel indebted to give them something back. That is cold and calculated. That's kind of cold.

Alan Lazaros

No, no, it's totally free.

Kevin Palmieri

By the way, we did just give you that flower. Kick us a five spot.

Alan Lazaros

Ten, five, ten, very last thing I know we got to jump. We were in book club, shout out to book club again, and we were talking about intentions, approach and results. Some people care only about the result but they don't care about the intentions and the approach. If you intend to do something good and you take a good approach and you know it's effective and then you get a good result, that's great, that's good, that's good for the world, that's good for you, like that's a win-win-win-win-win situation. But if you do that, that's bad intentions, kind of a manipulative approach and, yeah, maybe the result is good because their organization grows, but it's not good because your intentions and your approach were off. Nlu again, I use us as an example, leading by example. If I can get you to come to book club and it changes your life, that's a good thing, but I'm not going to give you a flower, so you come to book club.

Manipulative marketing tactics versus authentic influence

Alan Lazaros

We're not manipulating anyone and it's very hard, you and I. It's hard to grow a business In a world where people are manipulating. It's very hard to grow a business without using these tactics and we've chosen to do that like we won't. We're very, very transparent. We're very, we're very careful not to ever do anything like that it's hard, but not it's hard.

Kevin Palmieri

It's not hard not to do it, but it's hard to compete with people who are for sure, exactly, it's challenging. It's hard to compete with people who are for sure, exactly, it's challenging. It's challenging. There's very, very rarely do I again. Sometimes when I'm naming episodes, obviously it's a little bit hyperbolic. I try to do that less and less, though I don't know. I'm just I'm trying not to play that game, but we don't. We tend not to use a lot of sensationalized words.

Alan Lazaros

Well, these are the three quick tips to become a millionaire overnight, a trillionaire, did you know that? Trillionaire, oh, trillionaire.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't care about a million, I don't care about a billion, it's not enough Trillionaire, and I want it today too.

Alan Lazaros

Three quick tips yes, and we're also sending flowers.

Kevin Palmieri

Send us your P box.

Alan Lazaros

I was gonna say that if you want to send us your address, we will, and for nothing you don't need anything.

Kevin Palmieri

You don't need it, we don't. We're not gonna ask for anything. Yeah, yeah, it is brutal. It is brutal out there. Be careful. Yeah, that's, I think that's the thing.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, be careful kids get preyed upon. You remember those commercials back in the day when you're a kid. It's. They make it look amazing. You ever get the toy and it's like, oh, this is terrible.

Kevin Palmieri

Isn't that every fast food marketing? Still, yeah, man.

Alan Lazaros

Marketing versus reality. We got to do an episode on that, I know.

Kevin Palmieri

We were with Evan Carmichael and we were talking about marketing and I said, isn't marketing just making something look better than it is? And he's like, no, no, that's not what it is. I don't know, ev. I think it is now more than ever brother, more than ever brother. I think not all marketing is. I think some marketing is good, but I don't know. Again, I've never gotten a Big Mac that looks the way it does on the commercials. Mine looks like it's been run over and torn apart by a school of sheep. Still delicious, I'm not mad about it. Last thing, last thing, I was going to say okay, hold on, where did it go? It? Hold on, where did it go? It was about what we were talking about cold and calculated. Yeah, it was an example of cold and calculated. Warm and calculated. Say phrases until kevin knows I don't know, I don't remember, oh yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

This is why it's so important to just be aware, because there are a lot of people, companies, things out there that there that are cold and calculated and they're trying it's not that they're trying to take advantage of you. I don't know if they know there's any other way to do it. It's just the way it's always been.

Alan Lazaros

Some of them are trying to take advantage of you.

Kevin Palmieri

This is what I was going to say. I think this is why everybody hates car dealerships Because you go into the car dealership and it's this shit show of. I can't tell you the numbers unless you sit down at the desk. Okay, now you're sitting down at the desk, let me go talk to the manager. Well, this is the best the manager can do. Well, could the manager do this? I don't know, got to go talk to them. Here we go.

Alan Lazaros

And then it's this whole, the whole thing's a yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

And then you get to the back room after you've decided like, oh, this is how much the monthly price is, and they're like all right, cool, so this is your monthly price. Now do you need the door ding coverage? I think you probably do.

Kevin Palmieri

That's going to be another 40. Do you need the rim and tire protection? I mean, we live in New England. It's some of the worst potholes. That's going to be another $70. So you go from saying my payment is $300 a month to you getting the back row, and now you invested three hours, so it's the investment bias.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, it's a whole thing, it's a giant, just like auctions never go to an auction. Worst idea ever. An auction is every bias all at once. Just the ability to make an effective choice, like a smart, intelligent decision at an auction, is next to zero.

Kevin Palmieri

I want to go. I'm gonna go try it.

Alan Lazaros

So you, I made this reference in book club and we'll go. Uh, I playfully said this for anyone out there who has ever seen star trek, particularly the newer movies with chris pine. Captain kirk is a lot like you and I'm a lot more like spock.

Kevin Palmieri

Spock is vulcan, he's just very calculated yeah, he's not cold you would say that wait, chris pine, I'm chris pine yeah, I accept that that is a, that is a studly human right there, nice, but and you have been in wonky years right yeah yeah, spock is just much.

Alan Lazaros

He's just very calculated, but he's not cold and calculated.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, yeah, I'd rather be chris pine than calculated. I feel like if you're chris pine, you don't have to be. You just show up and smile. Everything, everything happens. You know what I mean, depending on your goal. I mean that he's a good looking dude.

Alan Lazaros

Those movies I think were awesome. I think they were good. Not awesome is probably a little.

Kevin Palmieri

Now I'm going to ask you one question before we get out of here. Okay, are you or are you not going to watch? It's a Wonderful Life. This year I should.

Alan Lazaros

I don't know.

Kevin Palmieri

I really think you should, yeah, I should, we got the projector man, the home theater.

Alan Lazaros

I put up the shelf it's. I don't want to hear it. I don't, seriously don't want to hear it until I get it, till I see a picture of it, come true, I don't even care, because in my mind it doesn't even exist. It's the best. Yeah, I'm sure I have an 83 inchinch TV in our bedroom, haven't turned it on in months.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't believe anything you say, because photos, or it didn't happen. Photos or it didn't happen.

Alan Lazaros

You have my direct line. You have my direct line. Perfect, I'll send it to your new PO box. Thank you so much.

Kevin Palmieri

It's actually an actual address address.

Alan Lazaros

thank, you so much. Whatever man, you need to watch it. Yeah, I think it'll give you a ton of perspective. You don't watch any of the movies I recommend. What are we doing here, man? All the movies that you? Every time I talk to you about a movie like I don't really like movies suck, they all suck, they don't all suck. Man, you're full of it. Titanic is awesome. There's certain movies that are awesome.

Kevin Palmieri

This is the best christmas movie of. This is the best Christmas movie of all time. Rated Best Christmas movie of all time Bar none, not close. It's from 19. 29?, 46. Oh, black and white Old school, really good. Acting Jimmy Stewart, I believe his name is Great actor.

Alan Lazaros

Just Selling it. Chief sales officer selling it. One last thing the lessons in it Fair.

Kevin Palmieri

That is the way to sell it.

Balancing competence and warmth for better relationships

Alan Lazaros

We do have to go, so you have like three seconds. Okay, three seconds. I opened with a book reference to strength and warmth. They've done studies on this. If you appear very, very calculated, calculated, people will consider you more cold. If you're more playful and funny, people will consider you more warm. Apparently, 80 of your first impression is just those two things. It's competence and warmth.

Alan Lazaros

So if you're very competent in real life, you have to come off extra warm if you want people to like you. That's very hard because if you want to be authentic, it's, you know it's harder. But, uh, if you are not very competent, you actually have to, like, portray confidence and act a little more stoic. And this is why people who feel like they're, uh, not very put together, they struggle sometimes with vulnerability and that's why they puff up and pretend to be more competent than they are.

Alan Lazaros

Because basically, everyone oh, don't judge people Well, everyone is unconsciously judging each other. That's just a fact of life and that doesn't mean the judgment's good, bad, ugly, whatever, like that's a whole nother conversation. But ultimately, the cold and calculated thing if you are someone who is a math thinker, who is calculated, you are gonna have to learn how to dial up warmth and I went to school with a lot of engineers. They, they don't know how to do that sometimes and they, a lot of them, came to me for help because they didn't know how to talk to girls same I do now though.

Kevin Palmieri

Married, got a wife. I'm smooth with it, I'm not. I say some dumb stuff often. Pretty often do I say some dumb stuff, not toxic Dumb, just dumb. I say dumb stuff with you too, for sure.

Alan Lazaros

Would you say you're more warm or competent? That was a test. You're supposed to say.

Kevin Palmieri

Kev, some of the stuff you've said has just been so impactful. I think it could. Course it could change the course of Life Time. I've got a couple that I quote of you For sure. I appreciate that I say some stuff that you've said too. A couple things, nice, nothing to write home about, you know, but it's okay, it's a good start. Alright, we're gonna get out of here.

Alan Lazaros

Alright, you can tell Alan and I are recording on a Sunday. We'll see you in an hour. Man, this never happens.

Kevin Palmieri

We don't ever record on Sunday.

Alan Lazaros

So it's a different energy man. This is all we have to do today, other than, obviously, the event. But it's different, right, because usually I'm just In the pressure cooker.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, we're going to play sports today we're going to play some b-ball. For sure we're going to play sports. I like a football. Let's play football. I like to throw the football around too.

Alan Lazaros

We'll see what happens All right Next Level Nation.

Outro

Kevin Palmieri

If you are not subscribed and you want to make sure you never miss an opportunity to get to the next level, make sure you are subscribed on whatever platform you are watching or listening on. Excuse me, and Saturday, 1230 Eastern Standard Time, book Club. Alan has been talking about Book Club a lot lately, so right now they are reading the Art of Thinking. Clearly, you don't have to have read the book, you don't have to participate in any way. You can just show up and be a fly on the wall. If you've been looking for a book club or you've been looking for people who really enjoy books, this is a great place to start. So I'll have the link in the show notes for that as well. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Kevin Palmieri

Keep after it. Next Level Nation. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

Head Shot

Alan Lazaros

Host
Head Shot

Kevin Palmieri

Host